THE PILLARS OF PATRIARCHY 3: THE SIDELINING OF WOMEN

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 15 พ.ย. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 408

  • @AndyCroat-v6d
    @AndyCroat-v6d 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +125

    The great Lily Tomlin said it 50 years ago: "Even if you win the rat race, you're still a rat." Dismantling is the way to go, absolutely. Enjoying your series.

    • @ladybug3380
      @ladybug3380 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Okay but what will it be replaced with.

    • @AndyCroat-v6d
      @AndyCroat-v6d 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      @@ladybug3380 What do you want it to be replaced with?

    • @anointedspirit2418
      @anointedspirit2418 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@ladybug3380matriarchy. Look it up.

    • @ajmosutra7667
      @ajmosutra7667 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Bok hrvate😂

  • @BlairWaldorf2013
    @BlairWaldorf2013 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +184

    The more and more women think about it, the more women will start to look at each other as if you’d have to be insane to deal with this just to be with them and endure so much.
    There’s literally over 8 Billion people (the earth 🌎 is over us) and there’s just nowhere left to keep doing this and at the same time be vilified for doing it and shamed for not doing it.
    That’s why the happiest people are unmarried, childfree, women. And I’m actually quite thankful to be amongst that group these days!

    • @navideology
      @navideology 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +15

      🎯🎯🎯

    • @veganbutterfly3652
      @veganbutterfly3652 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Not all women with children are unhappy. My life is very happy with my child. But I am very happy that I am not married. Marriage equals slavery. Never marry ladies. I am a single lady 🎵I am a single🎶🎵 You will be happy.😂

    • @powerhouse2024
      @powerhouse2024 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

      @@BlairWaldorf2013 so. perfectly. said. Vilified for doing it & shamed for not doing it. This is a hell realm nobody can change my mind.

    • @Secretzstolen
      @Secretzstolen 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      #4B!!!!!!!!

    • @BestversionofKP
      @BestversionofKP 15 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Yes!!!!!😊

  • @CNS_0507
    @CNS_0507 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +193

    This video reminded me of a time when my grandmother asked me if my husband helps me. I asked her what she meant by that and she elaborated by saying she was referring to chores. I said he does chores, but I didn’t view it as help since it’s equally his responsibility. I cannot explain the shock on her face. She said she was happy for me and that she had to give up on that with my grandfather. Thank you for another informative video!

    • @briannyob7799
      @briannyob7799 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +22

      As a man, I've said the same thing when asked if I helped with my then young son. I always said no, I'm his parent, and I look after him. I'm not babysitting.

    • @jessejules2092
      @jessejules2092 13 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Right. If a man says to me I'm helping you do such and such.....I say 'No, I'm helping you...' Then leave the work for him to do and for him to ask me for my help.

  • @AlterEgoPerspectivewBronxGirl
    @AlterEgoPerspectivewBronxGirl 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +44

    Girl you are not to played with. I am a 43 year old woman. And you don’t know how much I appreciate you. I love your younger generation for the teaching and informative content 😊

    • @yv_edit
      @yv_edit  4 หลายเดือนก่อน +11

      @@AlterEgoPerspectivewBronxGirl thank you so so much that really means the world to me 💗✨🥰

  • @RasheedahNizam
    @RasheedahNizam 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +93

    I remember when my oldest son left for university in another country. He had arranged for accommodation in a rented home with three other guys. He arrived to the home incredibly jet lagged and exhausted. He called me to say that all he wanted to do was sleep but that he couldn't because house was too dirty and messy for him to relax. He had been so excited to spend some time sightseeing in this new country.But instead he spent his first 2 days cleaning the place top to bottom. I know he spent some time guiding them as to how to keep the place clean themselves. All of the boys who were his roommates were part of our same community and we tend to do everything for our sons under the excuse that we need to free up their time for their studies. But to this day all three of those other men are single involuntarily and my son is happily married. Patriarchy sometimes teaches us to patronise men and treat them as if they are too dull for basic tasks like making a bed or passing a vacuum. In this new era of women working and contributing to bills, being too dull to load a dishwasher will keep all men single who wish to be partnered.

    • @truckin_babe
      @truckin_babe 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Congrats on raising a son that gets it!

    • @justynawisniewska1213
      @justynawisniewska1213 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +23

      They can absolutely learn all these skills as adults if they weren't taught as children, there is a lot of free resource online for them to learn basic housekeeping. And they absolutely should before anyone couples up with them. But the thing is they rather refuse to and blame it on the women in general that they can't find a partner because that's easier, the line of least resistance. I mean it's best if they are taught and expected to know how to do all that from childhood, but then again we can't blame it just on their moms for not teaching them, it's never too late to learn. When I was a kid I only did a few of the chores, did not know how to do it all and learned most when I moved out. For some I asked my mom for advice, for some I looked it up online.

    • @PungiFungi
      @PungiFungi 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      It appears the patriarchy also let women avoid doing the down and dirty job that maintain our civilization. Guess who collect the garbage, guess who maintain and build our infrastructure?

    • @EC-yl7xk
      @EC-yl7xk 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Thank you, Amen.

  • @talkingtochapri
    @talkingtochapri 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +27

    I have never met a 50/50 guy in real life, but if ever met him I'll ask him to pay 150k surrogate money per kid, and 1k escort service money each time. If women actually started doing 50/50 for everything they are providing, most males cannot afford to have women. For some reason they keep forgetting how expensive women bodies can be 🤷🏻‍♀️

  • @theodorathompson2034
    @theodorathompson2034 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +93

    Looking back over my 70 years of life, I realise that my efforts have been about diminishing myself and minimising my achievements, to not make the men in my life look less….which they inevitably were. Anyone who tells you to be modest, is not your friend. Loud and proud girls and women!

    • @kikijewell2967
      @kikijewell2967 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      Thank you!🎉💪

  • @jennab.6723
    @jennab.6723 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +100

    Thank you for reminding me I made a good decision by opting out of marriage at a young age. It just doesn’t benefit women unless he’s rich, emotionally intelligent, and loyal.

    • @anka6356
      @anka6356 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Unless he's a unicorn

    • @dominikaszymaszek45
      @dominikaszymaszek45 19 วันที่ผ่านมา

      And IF he exists 😂

  • @TheModernMuses
    @TheModernMuses 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +124

    My hubby is working his way out (if any of us ever fully can 😅) ingrained misogyny and he watched your last two videos intensely and has been waiting on this. A huge thank you to you!!!

    • @yv_edit
      @yv_edit  4 หลายเดือนก่อน +29

      that’s amazing thank you so much!! ❤

    • @justynawisniewska1213
      @justynawisniewska1213 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +20

      What an amazing husband you have then, so lucky! Most dudes would say this is men hating BS and get mad at you for showing this to them.

    • @aliciaerickson9862
      @aliciaerickson9862 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +12

      This is so heartening. You can’t change what you are unaware of.

    • @PungiFungi
      @PungiFungi 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Wait until you have to the work he has to.

    • @anka6356
      @anka6356 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@PungiFungi We found the brainwashed incel talking nonsense

  • @vickimerritt2832
    @vickimerritt2832 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +46

    Any issues women bring forth is called emotional, nagging, or dismissed as being " on the rag or being a nag".

  • @FishareFriendsNotFood972
    @FishareFriendsNotFood972 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +53

    It's such a double bind that women cannot win. Absolutely. Also the 'good guys' I've learned are not really allies, they are the 'good cop' in the 'good cop/bad cop' routine.

    • @TARAdubbleyuu
      @TARAdubbleyuu 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      Great observation

    • @jsChelimo
      @jsChelimo 19 วันที่ผ่านมา

      💯💯💯

  • @missinterpretation4984
    @missinterpretation4984 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +125

    Omg yes! The amount of gaslighting that happens when we’re told 100 hoops to jump through to get basic decent behavior out of them. Speak softly, don’t push, don’t expect too much, blah blah… so he’ll take out the trash! 🤬

    • @skarac3224
      @skarac3224 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +42

      i think this is why so many women are opting out of the nonsense because we can never win. and men are still trying to play.

    • @lr1698
      @lr1698 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +22

      Im in the midst of a divorce from a man who treated me badly. He rather divorce than work on himself. I thought I married a butterfly but he was a fire breathing dragon.

    • @powerhouse2024
      @powerhouse2024 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@missinterpretation4984 That day. Then you need to find the new pretzel to twist yourself into to get him to do it tomorrow.

    • @Greenplanet949
      @Greenplanet949 14 วันที่ผ่านมา

      It never works anyway. Being soft and nice just means you get flattened quicker and easier.

  • @ak-47intelligence75
    @ak-47intelligence75 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +85

    If a man cant hold a job down, doesn't have his finances in order, cant provide for his woman and family in this patriarchal system , then nothing can help him.

    • @wingnut71
      @wingnut71 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      That's not Patriarchy, that's down to women. It would be exactly the same or worse in a matriarchy.

    • @marys2406
      @marys2406 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@wingnut71 Cry Harder

  • @wanjirunjoroge5942
    @wanjirunjoroge5942 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +52

    As a child, I never imagined myself with a wedding dress. My grandpa was physically abusive to my grandma yet made sure my mum, the 1st born got the education and independence. The irony. My mum swore to never depend on a man and sure enough she has been success financially and my dad was probably attracted to this because he does absolutely nothing except exist. He has a job, he is a Professor but my mum has paid 90% of the bills and was still in charge of the wife role. We had help but when she went on vacation I took over as the 1st born out of 2 girls. My mum says she wanted a man who wouldn't be abusive and who would let her fly, she says she is happy so. I have been self sufficient and ever relationship I've been in, the men want to humble me or put me in a cage and want me to lose my identity nd that is why I always leave. 4B for life.

    • @jibarabicha4853
      @jibarabicha4853 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      I too share your point of view, I tried a marriage similar to your mom’s but they also wanted me caged and had to walk away. I realized that I am not the type of woman who can bend for this system. Every time I tried to participate, I always ended up feeling humiliated or in a never ending power struggle to preserve my sense of identity and independence. I have come to terms with what you have said in your comment and it’s been a sad but liberating realization.

    • @Secretzstolen
      @Secretzstolen 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      4B!!!

  • @anhangamirim
    @anhangamirim 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +39

    Patriarchy is disgusting and abusive. Patriarcal workshipers are too.

  • @cloudypolly22
    @cloudypolly22 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +61

    This series is so informative. You use the perfect words to explain how patriarchy hurts women. And I know people say it hurts men too, but if that was true, they would want to get rid of it.

    • @---Dana----
      @---Dana---- 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Patriarchy creates hierarchies to run all of the systems it creates and only those at the top benefit in any hierarchy so most men are left out along with women and minorities. Most men don't understand that they're getting screwed also as long as they can feel superior to and dominate women or a minority. Some do see it though like my husband. We think of Patriarchy as a giant Ponzi scheme.

    • @lesliegrace5986
      @lesliegrace5986 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Ppl are addicted to sugar because it tastes good. But it kills them too.

    • @peacefreedom4930
      @peacefreedom4930 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      It hurts men. It’s made them dependent on women, incompetent, entitled, immature, manipulative, emotionally underdeveloped, unbearable. The paradigm shift is causing men to have an identity crisis. They have been enabled and encouraged to be mediocre. But most people don’t like change. They feel powerless oppressing women and they can force women to make up for everything they lack.

    • @A_Womans_Worth
      @A_Womans_Worth หลายเดือนก่อน

      It also benefits them though, that’s why they uphold it. They are not suffering hard enough yet 🤭🙃 We need to make sure they jump through hoops and actually provide, before talk of a relationship. They need to be comfortable being a simp.

    • @PalisUK
      @PalisUK หลายเดือนก่อน

      red pill mentality would say that patriarchy was long dismantled. they describe society as 'gynocentric'. a gaslight, of course.

  • @margauxwalson8474
    @margauxwalson8474 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +39

    Thank you for doing this labor!!! I’m so excited to watch more of your work.

  • @olganova3058
    @olganova3058 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +55

    I can't scream enough on how much I'm in love with this girl ❤

    • @musicdd2
      @musicdd2 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

      girl crush material definitely!!!

  • @powerhouse2024
    @powerhouse2024 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +28

    Omg the exhausting truth of what happens in therapy is so real. Makes me so so thankful for my decade of 4B before it was called 4B. Let somebody else do it. Never again. These males are not worth it.

  • @susannehuber3996
    @susannehuber3996 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +72

    I saved my exes life by diagnosing testicular cancer in him early. I stayed with him during his whole treatment, cared for him, was with him 24/7. in his eyes I didn’t do anything to deserve respect because I’m just a woman (making 3 times as much money as him). The mistreatment I had to suffer after his recovery was insane. I broke up with him 2 months after his full recovery. Whatever you do as a woman YOU ARE NOT WORTHY OF RESPECT IN MENS EYES

    • @princessmorebucks
      @princessmorebucks 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +12

      You were an angel he did not deserve. I'm so sorry. I hope he lives with regret and more 💜

    • @kikijewell2967
      @kikijewell2967 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      You "made the mistake" of outshining him, and he tried to overturn that injustice to the Patriarchy.
      This is why men leave women when they get sick - because that labor is beneath them. It makes them look like the status of women.
      (The men I know who stayed with their sick wives have this cowed look of wanting to escape but can't. Literally. I don't know one who doesn't. They feel the pressures of the Patriarchy even if they fight it.)

    • @kikijewell2967
      @kikijewell2967 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +11

      And by the way, I'm so sorry you wasted your time. You came away both with a free conscience and a whole lot wiser.

    • @wingnut71
      @wingnut71 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I'm sure you're just perfect lady, never put a foot wrong do you, always right, and he is always wrong. I hope he gets a lot of alimony from you since you earn so damn much. Make a nice change from women taking money from their ex husbands.

    • @ddanielsmc
      @ddanielsmc 6 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

      So sorry for you. I do despair at some of the manchilds out there. I won't use the word 'man' as this should be reserved for the good, decent men that support their families.
      You did an excellent job in saving his life. You are a credit to society. I wish you a beautiful future

  • @desiagriffin9689
    @desiagriffin9689 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +35

    It’s so crazy that the courts worry more about a young man’s future than a woman’s after he’s done something heinous

    • @Iquey
      @Iquey 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +13

      We need more female judges, who did NOT go to a religious or conservative law school.

  • @KathleenFulton-u1x
    @KathleenFulton-u1x 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +39

    There is no girl code. If a woman works, has children and the housework is not done, other women will point out that it is not done and look down on her.

    • @Himmiefan
      @Himmiefan 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      We all know that's not true most of the time.

    • @NidzShah-ps6kr
      @NidzShah-ps6kr 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Nope no working women or homemakers do this simply bcz most people don't see how homes are run. They have no viewpoint to such a thing. Homemakers are undervalued, their labor isn't even recognised in most cases and working women know the struggle and will most likely relate.

    • @Iquey
      @Iquey 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

      ​​​@@Himmiefan depends on how your family is. If you have supprotive women in your family maybe it's different and better, but if you're surrounded by pickmeshas, it's hellishly lonely.

    • @rebekkagasmi9451
      @rebekkagasmi9451 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      ​​@@HimmiefanWell, one must literally be BLIND to not see that it's only too true... 😮

  • @marilynwarbis7224
    @marilynwarbis7224 2 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    Absolutely. And the old sayings summed it up succinctly - e.g., "A woman's work is never done", and "What's sauce for the goose is sauce for the gander."

  • @annmarieknapp
    @annmarieknapp 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +24

    The only way to winnthisvgame, is to NOT play. They don't deserve us.

  • @Himmiefan
    @Himmiefan 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +31

    The sidelining of women is really bad in any conservative religion.

  • @alexavasquez1992
    @alexavasquez1992 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +21

    This is by far the most depressing of this series yet. Thank you so much for putting words to what many of us have felt downtrodden by since childhood.

  • @alyssamaze5812
    @alyssamaze5812 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +40

    I really enjoy these in-depth videos about the patriarchal abuse and it's truly important for women to know these aspects of a cruel, callous, and oppressive nature of this screwed up system. Sorry but not sorry- men wouldn't survive a day, let alone centuries of what women have suffered and to continue suffer with.

    • @Jamhael1
      @Jamhael1 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Men suffer as well - the oppresion is there, its just not the same.

    • @alyssamaze5812
      @alyssamaze5812 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      @@Jamhael1 I am aware of that. The patriarchy harms everyone. Men's suffering is different and not the same as women's.

    • @Jamhael1
      @Jamhael1 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@alyssamaze5812 and now what? All I see is the woman putting ALL the blame on men, and you are seeing that complaining and nagging are only pushing the men away instead of pulling them to your cause.
      So, there is the conundrum - if men suffers under the patriarchy, but you pushing the blame on ALL men, then how in the Nine Hells you are gonna pull men towards YOUR CAUSE?

    • @NidzShah-ps6kr
      @NidzShah-ps6kr 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      ​@@Jamhael1 you joking right?

    • @Jamhael1
      @Jamhael1 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@NidzShah-ps6kr and here we go...

  • @vickimerritt2832
    @vickimerritt2832 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +33

    The cost of child care is not factored into why staying home is often a cost saving decision in marriage and that sacrifice does not weigh as financial contribution.

  • @ninipaints
    @ninipaints 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +12

    “the game is set up to knock you out of it at any tier, to use you conveniently and then toss you once you’ve served your purpose - your advantage lasts only as long as it ALSO advantages men/a man” THAAAAAT, nearly not talking or acknowledged enough but as women we all know it, we all feel it, we have all seen it over and over again

  • @rudetuesday
    @rudetuesday 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +29

    Thanks for laying these ideas out so plainly, with multiple examples. I can't help but think about how so many traditional marriage traditions involve women leaving their families to live with their husbands' family and community. The women lose their kin groups and community ties, and enter a space in which their closest social connection is to the person they're married to. This has been going on for a long time.

    • @pwh5805
      @pwh5805 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +11

      They always refer to divorce as ‘breaking up a family’, but isn’t getting married exactly that? I lost two sisters due to marriage.

    • @rudetuesday
      @rudetuesday 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      In some traditions, the bride's family weeps as she leaves their home. I'm sorry to hear about the sad loss of your sisters, @@pwh5805

  • @idreadFell365
    @idreadFell365 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +22

    This happens in media too, media such as movies, cartoons, and especially anime. Female characters are often just there to prop up or uplift the male characters by being a damel in distress or a love interest that very much centers men.

    • @idreadFell365
      @idreadFell365 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

      Mf will say, “it’s just fiction” but they let these fiction influence their perception of women. There’s kinda this cycle where a man’s perception influences their writing and then the writing influences life or common viewpoint and the whole thing loops throughout the modern age.

    • @destroyraiden
      @destroyraiden 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      right they like to pretend that watching something that reinforces the same thing 1000 times has zero baring and you not seeing people like you (aka lack of mirroring) has no harm or issue upon you yet both these things are the domain of the subconscious so yes they do girls learn they can only be heros in love when they're trying to keep a shitty partner with them, or a horror when they're being hunted and need saving and even when you get action movies the woman is taken down a peg somewhere in there as default coding so women don't get too many ideas.
      They omit and remove 99% of women's history on purpose keeping the bare minimum in and making women's history month a race to find the smallest most digestible morsel fact to say to some kids while "the real history" is told them them day in & day out in shows, their schools, their media obliterating any morsel fact the tired teach could find via a fast google search and those results were done deliberately to not showcase really awesome cases like Frau black death a 17yr old Commander in WW2 who won over 40 medals on the front lines as a heavy machine gunner. Nope we'd rather make a WW2 white guy pov instead with battles that had women in them like the battle of berlin.
      As once dev said on Assassins Creed "we just can't find women in history to use for these games" and then the women proceeded to iridate them & some even gave examples of about or in the same time periods. Then they said "we just can't rig a female skeleton together to perform the complicated move sets of stealth kills and walking" and female gamers pointed out they have background women who had to be rigged up and proceeded to show them how to rig female skeletons, and how they already did it in their own spin off games basically they were BS why can't they have female protagonists cuz they couldn't put in giggle physics.
      The brain needs to see people like them doing the x in question so they will then make moves to do the x in question yet you need alot of this reinforcement hence males get upset when 3 movies in a year do not have males in them yet 99.9% of all the other movies released for that year will have male leads. They know how vital it is to have constant and relevant and new material with someone like you in it and do not want anyone else to get that ability or else they'll become competition for them in real life.

    • @ladybug3380
      @ladybug3380 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      That’s why they hate when we’re self sufficient. They’ve been taught that we’re supposed to be weak and unable to take care of things.

  • @Datb2
    @Datb2 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +25

    Def ain’t dating anymore I’m not opposed to life long celibacy

  • @jessejules2092
    @jessejules2092 13 วันที่ผ่านมา +2

    I love that Christ - a man, challenged the patriarchal society through his respect of women embracing them as equals and entrusting them with the highest responsibility over men to share with the world spiritual concepts of enlightenment. Mothers embody the principle of all life.

  • @catherinebanks6420
    @catherinebanks6420 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    I've done the 50-50 game. Never again! I'd rather be single.

  • @ST-rj8iu
    @ST-rj8iu 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +22

    "Damned if you do, damned if you don't"

  • @tinachristine4573
    @tinachristine4573 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +30

    New sub, also you are amazing. The first men to kick me out were my own brothers and it continued throughout my life and I am now wary of men. They want to hoard power and to wield it against us.

  • @annmarieknapp
    @annmarieknapp 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +16

    Happily 4B!!!

  • @halliadams5987
    @halliadams5987 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +84

    The more and more I learn about patriarchy, the more angry, frustrated and sad I become.
    It will always be a lose-lose for the women.
    Time to opt out Ladies! The ONLY way to get this system to change is by withholding access to our labor. Let these men see how far they can get without exploiting women.😖

    • @KamalianCiranoush
      @KamalianCiranoush 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +15

      I feel the same. It saddens me that I live in a country where the "traditional" path (marriage & kids) is still very much one that the majority takes, without questioning it very much. Straying from the path has proven to be a very lonesome experience, especially because my friends, too, are centering men and marriage and are projecting their own desperation onto me.

    • @annmarieknapp
      @annmarieknapp 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +12

      Go 4B!!!

    • @nonotorious1467
      @nonotorious1467 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      What labor?

    • @JCX-yb8nm
      @JCX-yb8nm 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      @@annmarieknapponly the old ones are willing to do this

    • @JCX-yb8nm
      @JCX-yb8nm 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Just stay single or go for women. You’re not supposed to be with a man

  • @lr1698
    @lr1698 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +15

    Omg I’m overwhelmed listening to part 3. 😢 it ain’t nothing but the truth!

  • @AwsomeEnforcer
    @AwsomeEnforcer หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    I wish I had this knowledge as a young woman (early 2000's, such dark time for pseudo-feminism, porn as liberation and girl boss mantra's) I had wanted to be an animator ever since I was a child, I was a very talented cartoonist. What I didn't know is that it is a male led industry and I was bullied so heavily by my peers and male lecturer that I ran screaming into the arms of a female led field instead (nursing). I will never forgive the patriarchy for taking away my dream ever since I was nine. Never!

    • @MemyselfandI8716
      @MemyselfandI8716 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      ❤️ I’m so sorry. You should try stepping back into it. There’s so many more outlets nowadays to be creative. I hate this happened to you love but don’t give up!

  • @sirius_lily
    @sirius_lily 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    What a great series... you describe all tactics perfectly. Sometimes it's hard to really grasp why something feels wrong or unjust, but these breakdowns shed a light into it. Thank you so much 💜💜🌸🌸💜💜

  • @ameliaannhouck2670
    @ameliaannhouck2670 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +34

    YOUR PODCASTS ARE ABSOLUTELY BRILLIANT AND BEST EXPLANATION OF THE PATRIARCHY!! KUDO'S !! ESP FOR SOMEONE SO YOUNG , SO BRILLINANT MIND !! YOU SHOULD HAVE 1 MILLION VIEWERS !! YOU ARE THE GOOD ! SO EVERYONE SHARE THIS SO SHE CAN GROW HER PODCASTS !! DUE TO HER BRILLIANCE AND COURAGE !! THANK YOU FOR YOUR HARD WORK !!

    • @yv_edit
      @yv_edit  4 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      omg thats so kind and really means the world to me!! thank you so much :))

  • @vickimerritt2832
    @vickimerritt2832 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +17

    Look at how many negative lables their are for women and men dismiss women with thoses lables rather than address the issues she verbalizes.

  • @suolainenomena7631
    @suolainenomena7631 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +12

    Thank you. Your videos have been like a breath of fresh air

  • @alicec.6195
    @alicec.6195 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +20

    13:01 I am going through this right now. My (now ex) partner has done something really bad to me, involving other women that don't even know about it yet. So bad police could be involved soon.
    Somehow he is the victim now, his family is protecting him. It is UNBELIEVABLE.

  • @Jean-p3y
    @Jean-p3y หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    I really appreciate this topic. It is so true. There is the brotherhood. However, this system elicits women to being against other women.

  • @elzaocean
    @elzaocean 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +13

    Gem, you are a pure gem. Please never stop spreading the message.

  • @cosirecat263
    @cosirecat263 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    So blessed to have found your videos! Thank you so much for putting into concise wording the mechanisms of patriarchy, what a gem.

  • @tinyshepherdess7710
    @tinyshepherdess7710 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +18

    Sexual harassment, assault and blacklisting of women goes on in academia too. How many women have been driven out of master's and PhD programs?

  • @Hffefhjjhff
    @Hffefhjjhff 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

    I use to work as a cleaner at a hospital...our bosses were women...and except 4 male cleaners we were all female employees...I found our bosses did not expect such a high standard as the women....and if any of us women didn't do something...feels like the whole hospital was going to fall apart...and will be penalised.... however if the male does not do his job to the minimum standard....they will be promoted to a better position which pays more ..

  • @velislavaart2214
    @velislavaart2214 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +12

    Thanks for everything. ❤ From Europe.

  • @Guiltyangel605
    @Guiltyangel605 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    Your series on this topic is dissertation worthy. Absolutely fantastic work!
    💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯💯

  • @kieleleron85768
    @kieleleron85768 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    Loving this series you've written some great compréhensive stuff its encouraging to see younger women talk about this stuff

  • @kikijewell2967
    @kikijewell2967 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +11

    8:24 I read a study - picture of a messy room, "this is Steve/Sue's room. Describe Steve/Sue." Men described as "busy, ambitious," women as "lazy, scattered."
    Women put on makeup because _they are judged harshly when they do not._
    Women "like to clean" more than their husbands _because the husbands are not judged, but the women are._
    This judgement us not overt, it is covert, and it's impossible to point to, like fist fighting a cloud of gnats.

    • @oreocarlton3343
      @oreocarlton3343 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      that is because there is a social function for those values, its legitimate to expect that, not illegitimate.

  • @pythosdegothos6181
    @pythosdegothos6181 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I had always wondered what became of those women from that....video. I am dead honest here, when my "friends" showed me that vid, thinking I would find it funny, I flat out said things they did not expect, and I did ask "WHAT KINDA LIFE DO YOU THINK THOSE GIRLS ARE GOING TO HAVE FROM HERE ON OUT?!! YOU THINK THAT'S FUNNY?! " It was actually one of those days my faith in humanity took a header, but that was also a rather tumultuous time of my life.

  • @aprilswill9204
    @aprilswill9204 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    I LOVE this video!! I always hated the way I had to present information to a man to get support from him.

  • @WynnWynn-gl3fk
    @WynnWynn-gl3fk 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    Join 4B, try ladies, enough already.

  • @shans1986
    @shans1986 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +16

    Women must make a. new game in which to play.

    • @destroyraiden
      @destroyraiden 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      They tried before the witch trials the males took 4 years to work themselves into frothing rage then kicked off the witch trials so yeah while we need a new system and game women can not back down again it's burn the ships times and extinct the human race if need be every time women back down they're re-enslaved.

    • @wyleecoyotee4252
      @wyleecoyotee4252 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +10

      It's called 4B

    • @deirdremorris9234
      @deirdremorris9234 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

      No games. Education to the max!

    • @princessmorebucks
      @princessmorebucks 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      ​@@deirdremorris9234Both. Mën love games.

    • @ladybug3380
      @ladybug3380 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

      we need to take care of each other and the earth. That’s the game we need to play.

  • @Fkpatriarchy
    @Fkpatriarchy 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    Great work, really enjoying your series and learning a lot about why ive been confused for so long. Didn't see clearly the environment in which i was operating.

  • @morganhumphrey5587
    @morganhumphrey5587 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    WE LOVE UR CHANNEL. TH-cam NEEDS A FEMINIST ALGORITHM

  • @cynicalvixen9290
    @cynicalvixen9290 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

    The reason the GOP still stands is because of political bro code... You stand together even if it turns your stomach because in the end the reward will in some way be beneficial to all and the ends always justifies the means

  • @wyleecoyotee4252
    @wyleecoyotee4252 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +12

    4B ladies...4B

  • @estherlawrence6
    @estherlawrence6 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +10

    About the Amber Heard and Johnny Depp issue, I want to give another perspective to look at it. Let’s see Johnny Depp as the weak man in terms of patriarchy standards, in the sense he’s considered nice and caring to women, let women do whatever they want (remember it’s patriarchy view) and Amber Heard as the woman in destructive rage mode. We already know men are ruled by a certain level of hierarchy so weak men are seen as a problem to the male image, so sometimes instead of handling it themselves, they give them to the woman in destructive rage mode to deal with. From the woman side, she came from a place where her abilities where stifled and she being treated like an object. It is normal for her to feel rage towards this, towards men in general. However she has no power to pick which man to pour her rage on. That’s where the patriarchy hands her the weak man. By doing so, the patriarchy sends a message to men that being ‘weak’ is not an option, cause even the women you become weak for would destroy you.
    But patriarchy still wants to uphold the image that it cannot be defeated by mere women, and weak men are still men. So the patriarchy saves the weak man from the woman in destructive rage mode and send the message to other men that ‘it’s better to harm a woman than be weak and let her harm you but don’t worry if you with that kind of woman, only a man can save you’ This is shown by how the law ‘Big Daddy’ saved Johnny Depp.
    As much as rage is normal to feel as a woman, let’s try not to let it be used against us.

    • @princessmorebucks
      @princessmorebucks 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

      Wow. And no one ever asks about Amber's trauma. Why is she full of rage? Who did that to her? 😢

    • @Iquey
      @Iquey 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      ​​@@princessmorebucksthis. All this is why if you become a serial killer, use a male alias so the police dont actually use all their resources to catch you the way they would get more excited about a female serial killer. Or better yet, use the name of a genderless monster to keep them guessing.

    • @TARAdubbleyuu
      @TARAdubbleyuu 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      Johnny Depp is not a weak man. He's a good old boy misogynist with a southern drawl...a good cover, sir. He's a deviant wanna be rock star who ended up an actor. His best friends are people like Marilyn Manson, who also abuse and literally torture women. Weak men who are seen as good men do not talk about killing their wife, having sex with her dead body, and then burning her, as was revealed during that court case. Johnny Depp is one of the most powerful male actors ever, a raging alcoholic and violent drug abuser with multiple failed marriages who was tearing up hotel rooms and acting unhinged while Amber Heard was still in elementary school. He is NOT a weak man, according to your description of such. He's just another entitled man with power. Also, he was MUCH older than Amber Heard and manufactured an entire world around her of his own self-appointed handlers, which was also plain to see during that televised court case.

  • @darkage9897
    @darkage9897 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Thank you, great words!

  • @skarac3224
    @skarac3224 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +18

    this stuff makes me so angry

  • @EeeeVeee231
    @EeeeVeee231 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    TYSM for calling out mainstream western couples therapy...it makes me want to pull my hair out how usually the issue is women coming in about the political as the personal...such as misogyny in the home - unbalanced/unreciprocal division of labor & gendered invisible labor yet no one says that these women are gaslit & told its their harpy tone & demanding expectations. I want justice, equity, respect & holistic accomodations in response to social conidtions & conditioning & oppression in all relationships. Also couples therapy isn’t effective (more harmful actually) in abuse scenarios, narc abuse, weaponized incompetence included...

  • @zacharybosley1935
    @zacharybosley1935 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

    and I'm back!
    just gonna whip up some popcorn for this comment section.

  • @laurettaleone6482
    @laurettaleone6482 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I also have studied our society and finally learned about "patriarchy" , decades into trying to understand what was going on in life. Listening to your video's I see you are well researched. Bravo for all that you are presenting in such a well laid out way, with facts that back the unhealthy dynamics in heterosexual patriarchal relationships that have been programmed for generations and causing so much damage and disconnection. Something I found interesting was, when I was listening to you outline the set up womyn face when they go to counselling, "sounds like you are taking on leadership roles and of, you know, your tone is really harsh. When you go to your husband you should tell him all the things you are thankful for. When you bring up a concern you need to use this very soft tone . You need to make it a compliment sandwich. Don't expect anything to be done on your timeline, expect things to be done on his timeline. Definitely don't nag him, don't bug him. The status quo stays exactly the same. Nothing changes for womyn. It doesn't take womyn's experiences into account. It just aims to make things equal arbitrarily . It is a very surface way of dealing with these issues or trying to equate these things that can't be equated" The oppression of womyn, that you are outlining, also hits womyn, when they have adult children. The same things you JUST outlined, when EVEN going to a counselor/therapist for help in the unhealthy dynamic that starts happening with Adult Children as they NOW have internalized patriarchy and scapegoating womyn (mothers, are womyn and people) this very thing you have outlined is used against ELDER womyn, who are NOW exhausted from a life time of oppression, who had children they deeply LOVED and cared for , to the best of their ability in this oppressive system, NOW turn ON THEM and expect servitude, silence, obedience. CareGiVING not care RECEIVING balance. OR the daughters take on too much and do not find balance with the men in the family , and get burned out but BLAME the mother , or punish HER. And counselors will add fuel to this in the form of patriarchy scapegoating once again. If you look at the questionnaire done by one of the leaders in the field of Adult Children and Parent counselling (ADMRQ) by Julie Cwikel. The questions are ONLY asked by the ADULT CHILD's perspective. ugh. Womyn/girls in patriarchy are oppressed at every stage of life. And when mother's finally get through the deeply important stage of raising their children and look forward to enjoying their grandchildren and supporting their adult children through the trials of that busy stage, they are blackmailed with grandchildren being taken from them, or their grown children ghosting them, censoring them, silencing them. This SAGE stage that is about passing on "wisdom", as their bodies now are deteriorating, and energy is much less etc, this stage is to share wisdom/advice...yet this is NOW shamed..and they are sequestered to old age homes etc...away from family, company they know, people they lean on for safety , security and support and love and companionship. This AGE STAGE is elbowed out at a time they are very vulnerable. IT is framed as "work". Something a mother would not reach to use for raising her children. Patriarchy is about disconnection. SAdly. Thanks for daring to call this out. It takes GREAT COURAGE! Our generation, those that dare to do it, shake. The FEAR that has been instilled to stand up against oppression is GREAT. WE have witnessed the terrible backlash by family and husbands...ugh. You BRING HOPE for LOVE, CONNECTION, HEALING, HEALTH...that democracy in relationships offer. Thank you! Love & Light

  • @jul.escobar
    @jul.escobar 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Benefiting some at the cost of others ... well said!!

  • @Lysistrata2025
    @Lysistrata2025 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +7

    Yay! a new video!

  • @Mady8015
    @Mady8015 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    Could you do a video on how to emotionally deconstruct the role assigned to women within patriarchy? When we’re young we are programmed to believe that our value is given by centering men and we build our lives on that. To deconstruct all of that after the age of 35 when you start to see the system more clearly brings with it a lot of grief and loss of self.

    • @yv_edit
      @yv_edit  2 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      Great question that I have a lot of thoughts on! Video coming soon 👀🥰

    • @Mady8015
      @Mady8015 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      @@yv_edit I look forward to it! 😊

  • @redadmiral5623
    @redadmiral5623 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    Speak the truth sister.❤

  • @janelliot5643
    @janelliot5643 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Well done. Appreciated. Shared

  • @CultureCritic17
    @CultureCritic17 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +22

    They're just so horrible!

  • @waldowheres3681
    @waldowheres3681 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    Future was cheating on her with La La Anthony. La La was literally another married woman, married to Carmelo Anthony. one of the greatest players in the NBA in my opinion. Future broke up 2 marriages, not including his own. and men are somehow saying Ciara downgraded when she ended up with russel wilson? seriously?

  • @alise4eva
    @alise4eva 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Thank you so much 🤍🐇

  • @Asenueh
    @Asenueh 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +29

    TH-cam psychiatrist Healthy Gamer GG (Dr. Alok Kanogia) will do everything he can to avoid addressing patriarchy as a causal factor of male dysfunction and when he does reference patriarchy, he mentions it barely in passing and in a dismissive way.

    • @amandaeye11
      @amandaeye11 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +15

      Ok, I’m not the only one getting that vibe! I’ve enjoyed some of his content but it’s a glaring blind spot for him!

    • @Asenueh
      @Asenueh 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +17

      @@amandaeye11 Instead of guiding young men to treat women as actual people with full agency and not prizes in patriarchy, he'll blame "society" for male disconnection, but never tell young men that as stakeholders, they are empowered by their day-to-day actions to incrimentally evolve society toward a more functional paradigm.

    • @ejenglin
      @ejenglin 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +17

      Exactly. I watched a few of his videos and got the distinct impression that he avoided deep, structural issues for pseudoscience and man-child handholding. He is not about to lose viewers by telling men the truth about themselves.
      He is deeply unserious.

    • @EverythingLvl
      @EverythingLvl 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      He's just a grifiter catering to males. NEVER LISTEN TO MALES. ZERO of them are worth listening to.

    • @trustmaker1014
      @trustmaker1014 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +8

      I didn't really trust him from first impressions... then I knew he was full of shit when he announced his family vlog channel.
      No psychology expert will ever think a family vlog is healthy in any way at all.
      Just another example of exploiting the family (the wife's labor that maintains the family) for appearances and profit. And all she really gets out of it is more labor.
      Of course, family vlogs are dangerous for countless more reasons than just what I mentioned here. However, this is what pertains to the subject of this vid/comment.

  • @iamwhole8910
    @iamwhole8910 2 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Therapy does not even begin to look at the shadows of all the isms. This is the true shadow work. The social conditioning creates this MANTRICKS. I opt out and awaken to high levels of existence.

  • @jackshaftoe1715
    @jackshaftoe1715 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Opting out hahahahaha !!!🤣 So no one wants to call "Boss Babe" ?

    • @MemyselfandI8716
      @MemyselfandI8716 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Man that ONE collective XY braincell is so strong. Every where a male comments it’s always a =😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂. You poor things. There’s no hope.

  • @theageofgoddess
    @theageofgoddess 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

    💯Thank you so much for your service to humanity 💯🙏🏽✌🏾

  • @Id.rather.be.a.dragon
    @Id.rather.be.a.dragon 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    You can truly do an actual theses on THE BOYS 2019.
    Also FURIOSA and BATMAN THE DARK KNIGHT 2008

  • @Alexvkei.2002
    @Alexvkei.2002 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

    Yeah ❤❤❤

  • @la1bella82
    @la1bella82 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    I love your videos! Is there a way to get this translated to Spanish?

  • @batelshimoni1078
    @batelshimoni1078 11 วันที่ผ่านมา

    36:15 Love this part so much (^.^) This is why the best trajectory is to focus on US AS WOMEN individually and as a collective.
    The fictional organization I'd like to emulate so much is the Bene Gesserit, a sisterhood order of witches who have trained themselves physically, mentally, philosophically, psychologically and spiritually to transcend human limitations.
    Since the Dune Series was written by a man, the sisterhood is still beholden to the male Kwizats Haderach, who is himself a product of the Sisterhood's centuries-long breeding program. But the Sisterhood only evolved and strengthened further. After the last Kwizats Haderach God Emperor died, the Bene Gesserit and their offshoot/rival the Honored Matres combined into a stronger Sisterhood.
    I hope that one day, women can start truly developing ourselves. The Bene Gesserit is fictional, but we can emulate parts of their philosophy and endurance.
    (Males cannot be Bene Gesserit because their final exams would literally k i l l males that are NOT Kwizats Haderach. Only biological women can be Sisters of the order.)

  • @triloization
    @triloization 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

    Thank you for this whole series. It is such a good summary.

  • @ClaireGreen-wd2gm
    @ClaireGreen-wd2gm 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

    Hes a comment for the algorithms because im at work and cant watch it yet but soon.

  • @GardensFlowers-f7k
    @GardensFlowers-f7k 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    👏👏👏💯 thank you!

  • @EvoEcoGirl
    @EvoEcoGirl 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    Excellent series! Keep it up 👏🏽

  • @meganh4896
    @meganh4896 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    Loooove this and you!

  • @olympiaelda1121
    @olympiaelda1121 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

    Finally!!!

  • @Angel-rd3mi
    @Angel-rd3mi 18 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I loooove your Videos you safed me❤❤❤

  • @marleyofficialmedia
    @marleyofficialmedia 11 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Great work! So glad I found your channel. I would love to see you interviewing feminists and experts..

  • @juliebella1221
    @juliebella1221 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Excellent 😊

  • @SandKeats
    @SandKeats 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    I love this thank you

  • @KateBennet-do1ed
    @KateBennet-do1ed 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Thank you so much ❤

  • @jessicagerou4132
    @jessicagerou4132 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +4

    Men did start the 🔥!

    • @rayyf69
      @rayyf69 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      It was Prometheus and he was a man, yes. It wasn't always burning since the world was turning but has been for millennia, however it has started to dim and with it civilization.

    • @snakewarlock5291
      @snakewarlock5291 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      Eve gave the humanity knowlage

  • @JayBee-hk7ej
    @JayBee-hk7ej 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +16

    Kudos for mentioning Amber Heard and Johnny Depp.

    • @redleeks6253
      @redleeks6253 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Whats with those two? Havent watched yet but commenting for engagement

  • @arlett6477
    @arlett6477 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Can u stitch the hope peddlar link u talked about in the end of the video? Thank u... ❤

  • @navideology
    @navideology 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    💯

  • @Id.rather.be.a.dragon
    @Id.rather.be.a.dragon 4 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    🧡 🧡 🧡