What Adrienne said about feeling the need to entertain people when they stay over is facts. This is one of the reasons I don’t like people staying over, that pressure
Yes, my mother in laws friends came.along with ber when she came to visit from out of state bc they wanted to see California. And my mother in law said my daughter is relaxing with family time, shes not a tour guide, and told them to go rent a car if they wanted to site see.
OMG I felt that too! I tell people this all the time and they go like "you won't even notice I am there" and I am like "that's you but personally I'd feel obligated to entertain" which can get exhausting. When I am working from home having a guest over slows me down
Omg I was looking for this comment. I was crying, and the rest of them just listening with smiles…while I’m snorting and all types of nonsense lol. “I’m 56 I might get hurt”
As an African I never enjoyed staying over at people’s houses. Going to your aunts’ house meant you were going to wake up early to clean. Especially as a female, you had to cook and clean, whereas your male cousins would hardly have to do something. I understand that you have to help out as a visitor, but don’t treat me like a maid either.
This is soooooo true. There's always an uncle or aunt's house that my mum would say we should stay at. As an adult, I don't even tell anyone when I'm in their city. In and out!
Violated that man fr frrr 🤣😩 but I love it though Loni is so private about her life I love getting little glimpses of what her and James relationship is like lol
Adrienne, I feel you. I am not so good at getting into other families' routines. Feeling guilty about the house chores, what if I want a cup of tea at 3 am. What if I want to wake up at 11 am?
Some people have no shame for real!! I do not like taking over people’s spaces. If I must, you’d think I was a ghost because I wouldn’t leave an inch of a trail of my presence and I’d probably offer to clean the whole house and wash all the dishes lol. People’s homes are their zen so there’s no way I’m overstepping anyone’s boundaries in their own house.
Or their own lives???? Our home life is so busy, five days a year is all we can sacrifice for a mini famy vacay, do those people not have family or lives lmao
I don't mind houseguests IF: I know you, and I have advanced notice. Nothing annoys me more than a family member coming to town, the day of, accompanied by a random person I never met 🙄
Why is that the rudest thing ever to me...when people bring unknown people to your house without advanced warning? Nothing makes me more mad when my family does that.
I don't let people get to comfortable with me to the point where they are asking to come or inviting themselves over. My home is my sanctuary, and I am not trying to have people's spirits and nonsense in my home. People can come to your home with clandeistine motives, and I don't have time for that. People get nosey and too familiar.
I remember when I got my first apartment. I had a friend that was a couple yrs older come over, to see my new place. We wee sitting at the table when she picked up one of my teddy bears and started rubbing it all over her hair. It was so weird I asked her what in the world was she doing. She just kept smiling and rubbing the bear in her hair. The whole thing was so uncomfortable I ended up taking her home and never had her over again.
I also hate when I have friends over for the weekend and on Sunday evening people are still hanging around. Like go away, I need to decompress, and prepare for the new week. Why don't people know when to leave? I start planning when to leave as soon as I wake up in someone's house
I feel you, but it’s better to just communicate in the beginning, no? You can make it a joke! “I’m so excited I got ya’ll over for the weekend! Don’t play me come Sunday tho, I got shyt to do by noon, don’t make me drag yo ass out!” Or a bit passive, “Let me know if you’ll need a ride on Sunday, I’ll be heading out by noon.” Or direct, “I’m happy ya’ll are staying over, should be a good time. I’ll need my place by noon come Sunday so I can clean up and prepare for the week. You good with that?” Bam! Easier said than done tho sometimes, takes practice!
@@ms.hjohnson6820 Thanks for the advice. I will put this in practice. I think my problem has been assuming that these things are common sense. Like someone knowing to leave on Sunday cause we all need to prepare for Monday. I guess not. I'll communicate more
@@ken4722 You didn’t ask for advice. Sorry about that. I just learned to be direct to avoid prolonging issues and wasting energy. Glad you didn’t take offence. I hope my suggestions work should you need them :) I’ll try to take my own advice lolll
@@ms.hjohnson6820 no no.. no offense taken at all. I loved the advice. I love mature conversations, they are difficult to come by on the internet. Your suggestions were much welcome.
Nothings worst than being the first of your friends to get their own place 🤦🏾♀️ they always want to come over. Same as if you’re the first of your friends to get a car as teenagers,,l everyone always wants a ride somewhere
Everyone I know is super respectful as a guest,and I’m happy to use our space like a hotel for our friends. We live in Beverly Hills with a spare bedroom, and hotels are so expensive. I’d love to help my friends be able to travel without worrying about accommodation
This is how my family and I are too. Come come all. The door is always open. You hungry, come ill make you something. I love this about my family, and I appreciate you are cut from the same cloth. We need more hospitable people who don't judge, and make you feel welcome.
Well we aren't on that celebrity payroll, so yeah they don't know what working an normal 8-5 is. I just ignored that comment bc most of us will never relate to a Hollywood's lifestyle.
I don't mind low-maintenance house guests. Meaning I will have food there for you but you have to cook it. You get fresh sheets but if you spill something in them you need to wash them. I will not be entertaining you. Don't bother me after I go in my room for the night, unless you dying or somebody done broke in.
Lol yesss! I would love to be a low maintenance host. But also don't want people to think I'm rude so I end up feeling inclined to entertain my guests and have a full itinerary for them. I know I put this weight on myself and that's why I don't like having guests. One overnight guest per year!!
@@mixedmamiiD Hey, to each its own. The same way you can order food at a hotel, you can order food. You can decide to cook whatever but I am not going to feel obligated to cook unless I invited you. If you invited yourself then I will have food for you but how it gets made is up to you.
@@valeries3829 Lol!! I mean I make sure the house is clean, and there is food & snacks. I even have toothbrushes, lotions, etc for them. And I always buy brand new towels, rags, and a snack bag that I put on their beds. But cooking every day and entertaining I just can't. Especially, if it's during a time of year when I am still working and it's just someone who asked if they could stay with me and I didn't invite them.
@@ashleyrogers1930 Lol, yass! But some people are salty AF and even though you do the things you named like making the place perfectly self sufficient people still expect you to play tour guide and spend every waking moment with them even. Completely unable to entertain or occupy themselves. So annoying! No time for that, agree with you esp if I’m working. 🙄
If you're not invited, you're not coming over. Plain and simple. I don't like unwanted guests. I think it's rude to invite yourself into someone’s home. Be polite. I love how animated Loni is with her stories. She is hilarious. Her story about James was great!
The circumstances are everything!! If someone’s in a pinch and I care about them, family etc. stay as long as you need. If you’re just dropping by to Kiki or want a vacation, you’re not sleeping over lol. I only like guests if it’s for 1 or 2 days and pre-planned months in advance.
Was Adrienne talking about staying with friends? She has mentioned before about always staying with her mom or sister. And a few others before she got her own place.
I would just say, "Hey so glad that you are coming. I'm so busy but let's meet for lunch or brunch or something." If they actually then still ask, say, "I wish I could but my house is such a mess and crowded, but I can point you to some great places to stay." If you have the money, then you can also say, "Oh well I can pay for your hotel/motel stay while you are here if you want." I personally hate having people over because growing up and post that my parents would have everyone come stay in our house. I have had so many things snooped through, used, and destroyed by people I did not even care for.... And my family picked my room to hand out to people because I would decorate it so well in every place we lived. But that my parents love showing off to strangers and fake friends and put family second is another story. So anyway, I also do not stay in anyone's house when I travel now. I would rather not burden another nor be indebted to people when I can pay for my own stay. And if I stay at their house they feel like their family, acquaintances and friends now have a free pass to live with me.
I honestly don’t even really like having company over to visit, unless it’s close family or close friends. I feel like I have to feed you, let you control the tv, and worst of all entertain you. It would be super awkward with someone staying the night.
You just ignore the message or you have plans, as simple as that. I’m a people pleaser but learned that I needed to put boundaries in place for those “special peeps”because you do feel the pressure to entertain even though they invited themselves over! 🧐🤨 Not only that, we take care of and pay for everything.
I don’t have extra bedrooms that aren’t being used for something so theirs no room so that’s how you avoid your house even being an option. I also don’t like staying at anybody’s house that’s not my moms and definitely don’t like staying at his moms house ever!
Ah, this makes me sad. I love my mother in law. We don't stay with her much anymore bc of covid, however I miss spending time cookout or hanging out in the garden with her. It's unfortunate some people won't experience the love of a kind M.I.L.
I thought this was an introvert problem. I definitely went through this before but with my own friends. 😫😅 and its so hard to not come off as an asshole lol and thats so funny about James. I literally cant picture him getting mad at anyone lmao
I think the convo was less about the challenges that come with being invited but more about the challenges that come with being uninvited… asserting oneself in another’s home. I feel you though.. never had that happen.
I love what kandi brings to the table but anyone else wondering where Jeannie is at? I hope she didn’t leave the show like tamera. I love Jeannie and her energy that she brings to the conversations.
I was put in an awkward position last year, my friend came from overseas knocked on my grill, when I went out she just said 'open the grill'🤔🤔I said why and she just casually said I'm staying by you. I was disappointed and I felt disrespected 😤 and used. She stayed for three days and the worst thing about it she always goes out and eat then come home and sleep. Total shock.
@@ms.hjohnson6820 it meant grill, in jamaica 🇯🇲 we grill our houses. she did tell me she was coming to jamaica but I had no idea she was planning to stay at my house.
@@joanhall3808 You grill your house in Jamaica?? Is that putting on a fly screen door? Okay, I understand that she stayed with you. Hell to the no on that!! That sucks bc she puts you in a difficult position of having to turn her away and ruin the friendship, or, dishonour yourself and let her in for fear of ruining the friendship. That’s a loose loose. Sorry that happened :/ yikes
It’s common in Norway to spend weekend at someone’s house when visiting someone who lives far away from you. This can be really nice IF no one overspends their welcome, and the guest shows gratitude, is wiling to partake economically and help out with everyday chores etc. I live in rather small apartment with two female flatmates. We are all students with exams and such to concider, so when someone wants to stay over we really have to check in and make sure all three are okay with it. I’ll usually be okay with short time visitors, but there is a difference between when I am the one hosting vs. when my flatmates are the ones responsible for the guest. If my flatmates are the ones responsible, I usually won’t mind having a guest over a few nights, and I don’t really mind being the host as long as it doesn’t crash with the times when I’m the busiest. We live in the capital, and I have several friends who lives elsewhere but take on gigs here from time to time. Some of them only need to spend a night or two, which is usually fine (- They just need a couch to crash on and not much attention from us otherwise,) but we’ve had people stay for a month and that was a lot.. Also, certain people are much easier to house than others: like what A said about there being people whom you feel like you have to entertain and do every single thing with and for them, whilst others are very autonomous. Some guests buy their own food and clean their dishes etc, whilst others truly act like they’re staying at a hotel. We had this one guest who stayed with us for several weeks without ever buying any groceries. The reason this felt a bit economically invasive is because all three of us who live in this apartment are students, whilst SHE was staying with us to WORK without having to spend money rent a place. It felt a bit like the “You give an inch and they take a mile”-situation. If the roles were reversed, and I the one working and in a stronger financial situates than her, I wouldn’t have minded it. But it made me realize how important it is to not take blessings and peoples kindness for granted, and to be aware of others circumstances. Another guest I had: He came over in the evening and i set up a bed from him in the living room. I understood that he hadn’t brought any food for breakfast (which was perfectly fine since he was only staying one night) and told him where the different foods are and that he can take whatever he needs in the morning (because I like sleeping in and wont wake up to cook for this grown man. Also: this guy had been at out place several times before. ) I woke up at 11:30, and this man had been awake and hungry since 07:30 without eating anything. I felt guilty,, even though I had warned him that he would have to make his own breakfast. Whenever this person stays over, I know now that I’ll be responsible from his meals and to entertain him, because he’s shy and awkward, and wont dare to do anything on his own. He is someone whom I can’t have staying over when I can’t make time to take care of him. So the lesson is: As a guest, show consideration and gratitude. If you stay for several nights, be even more considerate: offer to split bills or pay for groceries if you can, try to help out with chores where you can. At the very least be autonomous enough to be able to make yourself a meal and not be totally reliant on the host - cuz she ain’t your mama. Also, I know some people can be reluctant to take others food because they want to be considerate (which is actually very sweet), and in those situations it can be wise to bring a little something: Either a snack for yourself to munch on when hungry or something that you bring to the household so that you don’t just “take” their food but you are also contributing. But if you’re hungry and someone tells you that you can take some food, it really is okay to do so, (as long as you don’t go bananas or literally steal from them.)
Sorry to say but people do avoid guests with kids like hell. They imagine their home will be upside down and they don't have power to discipline your child, it's also more expensive coz it's 2 mouths to feed
Unwanted guests? Absolutely NOT. I also have rules. IF you are invited, you can't stay for more than 3 days AND you have to be tested for covid. That's just to be able to sleep here. There are more rules once you are allowed. Lol. If that doesn't sound appealing, go to a hotel ✌🏼
Omg Kandi you have two mansions next two each other just have them stay in the other house and you never have to see them if you don’t want to. Also I agree with Kandi everyone isn’t Michelle Obama if you go low I’ll go lower me being the bigger person won’t teach you nothing
This!! If I was rich I'd have a mega house or two houses right next to each other. I'm an introvert and my home vibes are my everything so its not that I don't like my family, I just don't like people funking up my space with their various energies. We can hang out for some period of time but after that, I need my own space. Oh the problems being rich would solve.
I totally agree.. some people need to learn for the next time, if there's a next time for us. I'm a really really nice Taurus but don't disrespect me cause it won't be good for you... I don't play like that.
@@egyptscott4801 Some people just don’t understand. I’m a Leo but a Taurus moon. Comfort and vibes are everything. Please do not disrupt my peace it won’t be pretty 🔪
Dang, well when I didn't have kids I'd always go visit my siblings from out of town. And I'd stay with them, never thinking twice about it. Now that I'm married with kids, I'd feel like it's too much. I guess I should had been more respectful, and asked. I'm the youngest and I'd assume I'd always have a place to call home when I visit family.
My soon to be ex husband had no shame about asking to stay over at people’s houses. I think if you come from a close family where it isn’t an issue, it’s okay, but I would feel strange asking a friend to accommodate me. Anything beyond a week feels a bit too long if you aren’t making the trip to spend time with the person and with an invitation.
Yeah, I stayed at a friend's family house for a couple of days during a hurricane watch. I ate all the meals with them and even made conversation with them and I then chilled in the room they gave me because I'm an introvert. Then my friend came at me like you need to apologize to my parents because they are offended. I was like seriously? I then sat uncomfortably with the family, but I refused to apologize cause now you made me uncomfortable when you're the one that invited me over and it's the way you went about it. How about knocking on my door and saying, " Hey the kids are playing a game, would you like to join?" that would be less awkward than you sending your son over to tell me your offend cause I'm not hanging out with you. I'm still cool with the mom, but yeah never sleeping over there again next hurricane watch I'll just stay home lol
This new generation where people don’t want to talk laugh with family and friends stay with them it’s just not it! what is wrong with communication talking over breakfast having sleepovers ,like I really don’t understand this new generation everything is bad and negative.
I hate having people stay over at the house specially my nieces and nephews they trash up the house and they are very loud and annoying it’s not even my house I’m ready to have my own place I don’t want people staying over at my house not even a month like i am a person who doesn’t like living with people who are messy
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What Adrienne said about feeling the need to entertain people when they stay over is facts. This is one of the reasons I don’t like people staying over, that pressure
Yes! Then you end up uncomfortable in your own house because you feel like you have to look after and entertain someone 😂
Yes, my mother in laws friends came.along with ber when she came to visit from out of state bc they wanted to see California. And my mother in law said my daughter is relaxing with family time, shes not a tour guide, and told them to go rent a car if they wanted to site see.
@@livinglachandra3120 facts 😭😭 feeling uncomfortable in your own house
😂😂😂😂😂🤣🤣🤣😍😍🤣
OMG I felt that too! I tell people this all the time and they go like "you won't even notice I am there" and I am like "that's you but personally I'd feel obligated to entertain" which can get exhausting. When I am working from home having a guest over slows me down
Loni's story about James was hilarious!! LOL!!
"Do you wanna take to the streets" I cracked the hell up James a trip lol lol those male egos!!
Why does she do that voice! 😂😂😂😂
Omg I was looking for this comment. I was crying, and the rest of them just listening with smiles…while I’m snorting and all types of nonsense lol. “I’m 56 I might get hurt”
@@MissTreStar Garcelle really laughed, the others were lost in the story.
I was rollin! "He's just one of those people that like to fight" 🤣🤣
She told all his business
As an African I never enjoyed staying over at people’s houses. Going to your aunts’ house meant you were going to wake up early to clean. Especially as a female, you had to cook and clean, whereas your male cousins would hardly have to do something. I understand that you have to help out as a visitor, but don’t treat me like a maid either.
Yes and I like to sleep in
I know that feeling
Ma'am, I couldn't poo at my cousins' house. Didn't feel clean showering and would wake up early because I FELT UNCOMFORTABLE!!!
This is soooooo true. There's always an uncle or aunt's house that my mum would say we should stay at. As an adult, I don't even tell anyone when I'm in their city. In and out!
I feel u✊🏽
Loni stays playing James on national tv 😂 she don’t have to do him like that 😭
Violated that man fr frrr 🤣😩 but I love it though Loni is so private about her life I love getting little glimpses of what her and James relationship is like lol
That was too funny!!!
Adrienne, I feel you. I am not so good at getting into other families' routines. Feeling guilty about the house chores, what if I want a cup of tea at 3 am. What if I want to wake up at 11 am?
Yes I’m odd, I do things at all hours of the day and night lol I don’t want to be judged for washing laundry at 3 am 😂🤣😂
@@Msladyrae92 Exactly. Nothing beats the freedom in my house 🏠. 😂😂😂😂😂
THIS IS IT!!!
@@Msladyrae92 same!!
Loni's story has me deceased!! 🤣🤣🤣
I died laughing because of how she laughed too
The VOICE!!!
I hate staying at someone's house I can't be myself totally. I prefer a hotel where I have room service and housekeeping
Your husband’s friends staying over for a month? That’s absolutely ridiculous. Do people not have any shame? Lol
Some people have no shame for real!! I do not like taking over people’s spaces. If I must, you’d think I was a ghost because I wouldn’t leave an inch of a trail of my presence and I’d probably offer to clean the whole house and wash all the dishes lol. People’s homes are their zen so there’s no way I’m overstepping anyone’s boundaries in their own house.
Well technically Kandi has a separate guest house so they’re not exactly in the main BUT I get it tho!
Or their own lives???? Our home life is so busy, five days a year is all we can sacrifice for a mini famy vacay, do those people not have family or lives lmao
@@rbmiddleton1979 But does she have to entertain them during that period 🤔 1 month and above 😂
Taking advantage of their rich friends. And I’m sure Kandi and Todd aren’t even home for the full month, they travel often
I feel you Adrienne, I also don’t like when ppl insist on coming over and you don’t want visitors.
I don't mind houseguests IF: I know you, and I have advanced notice. Nothing annoys me more than a family member coming to town, the day of, accompanied by a random person I never met 🙄
Why is that the rudest thing ever to me...when people bring unknown people to your house without advanced warning? Nothing makes me more mad when my family does that.
Oh God, African family 🌚
I hate this too!
I like the anonymity and peace of a hotel room over staying as a guest at family since there is an expectation of obligation on either side.
And most times that obligation is never fully communicated but assumed leading to major disagreements 🤣🤣🤣🤣
I don't let people get to comfortable with me to the point where they are asking to come or inviting themselves over. My home is my sanctuary, and I am not trying to have people's spirits and nonsense in my home. People can come to your home with clandeistine motives, and I don't have time for that. People get nosey and too familiar.
I remember when I got my first apartment. I had a friend that was a couple yrs older come over, to see my new place. We wee sitting at the table when she picked up one of my teddy bears and started rubbing it all over her hair. It was so weird I asked her what in the world was she doing. She just kept smiling and rubbing the bear in her hair. The whole thing was so uncomfortable I ended up taking her home and never had her over again.
Adrienne looks so pretty with her hair like that.
Yes, it fits her so much!
James story is hilarious!! Laughted so hard🤣🤣🤣🤣
I also hate when I have friends over for the weekend and on Sunday evening people are still hanging around. Like go away, I need to decompress, and prepare for the new week. Why don't people know when to leave? I start planning when to leave as soon as I wake up in someone's house
I feel you, but it’s better to just communicate in the beginning, no? You can make it a joke! “I’m so excited I got ya’ll over for the weekend! Don’t play me come Sunday tho, I got shyt to do by noon, don’t make me drag yo ass out!” Or a bit passive, “Let me know if you’ll need a ride on Sunday, I’ll be heading out by noon.” Or direct, “I’m happy ya’ll are staying over, should be a good time. I’ll need my place by noon come Sunday so I can clean up and prepare for the week. You good with that?” Bam! Easier said than done tho sometimes, takes practice!
@@ms.hjohnson6820 Thanks for the advice. I will put this in practice. I think my problem has been assuming that these things are common sense. Like someone knowing to leave on Sunday cause we all need to prepare for Monday. I guess not. I'll communicate more
@@ken4722 You didn’t ask for advice. Sorry about that. I just learned to be direct to avoid prolonging issues and wasting energy. Glad you didn’t take offence. I hope my suggestions work should you need them :) I’ll try to take my own advice lolll
@@ms.hjohnson6820 no no.. no offense taken at all. I loved the advice. I love mature conversations, they are difficult to come by on the internet. Your suggestions were much welcome.
Kandi has been killing it on her guest co-host rounds the past month. Love her personality.
I was trying to understand why this segued into a James story, but I'm so glad it did because it gave me everything that I needed. 🤣
Kandi: don't talk to me to death 😂😂💯
Nothings worst than being the first of your friends to get their own place 🤦🏾♀️ they always want to come over. Same as if you’re the first of your friends to get a car as teenagers,,l everyone always wants a ride somewhere
Everyone I know is super respectful as a guest,and I’m happy to use our space like a hotel for our friends. We live in Beverly Hills with a spare bedroom, and hotels are so expensive. I’d love to help my friends be able to travel without worrying about accommodation
This is how my family and I are too. Come come all. The door is always open. You hungry, come ill make you something. I love this about my family, and I appreciate you are cut from the same cloth. We need more hospitable people who don't judge, and make you feel welcome.
A month? So, they don't have a job? 🤔
I wish I could take a month off work and just stay at a friend's mansion for a month lol..
All I know is if I hear her tell this story, I am never going back to her house.
Well we aren't on that celebrity payroll, so yeah they don't know what working an normal 8-5 is. I just ignored that comment bc most of us will never relate to a Hollywood's lifestyle.
Garcelle needs a fashion channel cause she looks good on every show! Gonna miss this show so much 😭
I don't mind low-maintenance house guests. Meaning I will have food there for you but you have to cook it. You get fresh sheets but if you spill something in them you need to wash them. I will not be entertaining you. Don't bother me after I go in my room for the night, unless you dying or somebody done broke in.
Lol yesss! I would love to be a low maintenance host. But also don't want people to think I'm rude so I end up feeling inclined to entertain my guests and have a full itinerary for them. I know I put this weight on myself and that's why I don't like having guests. One overnight guest per year!!
I'd rather be at a hotel. I'm not cooking at your house. 🥴
@@mixedmamiiD Hey, to each its own. The same way you can order food at a hotel, you can order food. You can decide to cook whatever but I am not going to feel obligated to cook unless I invited you. If you invited yourself then I will have food for you but how it gets made is up to you.
@@valeries3829 Lol!! I mean I make sure the house is clean, and there is food & snacks. I even have toothbrushes, lotions, etc for them. And I always buy brand new towels, rags, and a snack bag that I put on their beds. But cooking every day and entertaining I just can't. Especially, if it's during a time of year when I am still working and it's just someone who asked if they could stay with me and I didn't invite them.
@@ashleyrogers1930 Lol, yass! But some people are salty AF and even though you do the things you named like making the place perfectly self sufficient people still expect you to play tour guide and spend every waking moment with them even. Completely unable to entertain or occupy themselves. So annoying! No time for that, agree with you esp if I’m working. 🙄
Loni's impersonation of her man gets me every time 🤣
If you're not invited, you're not coming over. Plain and simple. I don't like unwanted guests. I think it's rude to invite yourself into someone’s home. Be polite.
I love how animated Loni is with her stories. She is hilarious. Her story about James was great!
The circumstances are everything!! If someone’s in a pinch and I care about them, family etc. stay as long as you need. If you’re just dropping by to Kiki or want a vacation, you’re not sleeping over lol. I only like guests if it’s for 1 or 2 days and pre-planned months in advance.
Loni is Hilarious 🤣🤣… Gosh im gone miss this show when it ends 😩😩
James story is hilarious!😂😂😂😂
I’m 100% like Garcelle. I’m not arguing with anyone and I’m quick to unfollow/unfriend permanently when someone disturbs my peace.
James said, “I’m crazy, not stupid!” 🤣
I would never stay at someone's place for their and my own comfort.
This was a really good segment 😂😂 I’m gonna miss these ladies.
When you live out of town friends and family will try to use your place as a free vacation spot . Assert boundaries
Was Adrienne talking about staying with friends? She has mentioned before about always staying with her mom or sister. And a few others before she got her own place.
Loni talking about James had me rolling!
I hate that they canceled the real!
Its good to hear such honestly concerning the feelings about houseguests.
I like Kandi. She’s pretty and it feels like we can hang out with her and have a great time 🥰
If your a person that wears out your welcome and it has to take that host saying “ alright it’s been fun” for you to leave it’s a problem 😭
I would just say, "Hey so glad that you are coming. I'm so busy but let's meet for lunch or brunch or something." If they actually then still ask, say, "I wish I could but my house is such a mess and crowded, but I can point you to some great places to stay." If you have the money, then you can also say, "Oh well I can pay for your hotel/motel stay while you are here if you want."
I personally hate having people over because growing up and post that my parents would have everyone come stay in our house. I have had so many things snooped through, used, and destroyed by people I did not even care for.... And my family picked my room to hand out to people because I would decorate it so well in every place we lived. But that my parents love showing off to strangers and fake friends and put family second is another story.
So anyway, I also do not stay in anyone's house when I travel now. I would rather not burden another nor be indebted to people when I can pay for my own stay. And if I stay at their house they feel like their family, acquaintances and friends now have a free pass to live with me.
James is crazy!😂😂 but he ain't no fool 😂😂
I don't like sleepover with family homes
I'm with Adrienne
I like my own space😂
Loni using "the voice" to mimic James. 🤣🤣🤣 that almost took me out
I honestly don’t even really like having company over to visit, unless it’s close family or close friends. I feel like I have to feed you, let you control the tv, and worst of all entertain you. It would be super awkward with someone staying the night.
Haha for real. Got me worrying if you're thirsty, hungry, cold, hot and if you are having a good time or not. Its so exhausting to host people.
You just ignore the message or you have plans, as simple as that. I’m a people pleaser but learned that I needed to put boundaries in place for those “special peeps”because you do feel the pressure to entertain even though they invited themselves over! 🧐🤨 Not only that, we take care of and pay for everything.
I am 56 years old I might gt hurt 😂😂😂
I don’t have extra bedrooms that aren’t being used for something so theirs no room so that’s how you avoid your house even being an option. I also don’t like staying at anybody’s house that’s not my moms and definitely don’t like staying at his moms house ever!
Ah, this makes me sad. I love my mother in law. We don't stay with her much anymore bc of covid, however I miss spending time cookout or hanging out in the garden with her. It's unfortunate some people won't experience the love of a kind M.I.L.
I thought this was an introvert problem. I definitely went through this before but with my own friends. 😫😅 and its so hard to not come off as an asshole lol and thats so funny about James. I literally cant picture him getting mad at anyone lmao
The James story had me CRACKING UPPPP
I feel Adrienne 100%
Do not invite me to your house if it is messy, unorganized, or a hoard. Disrespectful!
I think the convo was less about the challenges that come with being invited but more about the challenges that come with being uninvited… asserting oneself in another’s home. I feel you though.. never had that happen.
Adrienne is giving me major Leah Remini vibes with this hair and look. ✨
Very true
I love me some Leah Remini 😍
Garscell looks so beautiful and classy
Always😊 the definition of sit still and look pretty 😄
im so opposite i dont like people coming over but i loveeeee spending time staying over my friends and close family !
Nah if he drove to the park and got out the car he gotta finish what they started💀he in too deep na 😭
I love what kandi brings to the table but anyone else wondering where Jeannie is at? I hope she didn’t leave the show like tamera. I love Jeannie and her energy that she brings to the conversations.
Well the show is ending this is the last season so Jeanie doesn't need to leave. She probably just took the day off
@@bellaapple2166 damn I didn’t know that! The real is one of my fav talk shows.
This video cover so much 🤣🤣🤣. "James, do a breathing exercise"
Adrienne's white dress is the cutest thing! She needs to tell us where she got it from!
I just tell them that they are getting on my nerves and they need to go
Put them to work!! Great idea!!
Loni story about James lmaooooo omg 😭
It’s called: GET A HOTEL!
I was put in an awkward position last year, my friend came from overseas knocked on my grill, when I went out she just said 'open the grill'🤔🤔I said why and she just casually said I'm staying by you. I was disappointed and I felt disrespected 😤 and used. She stayed for three days and the worst thing about it she always goes out and eat then come home and sleep. Total shock.
Does open the “grill” translate to “door”? And when she said I’m staying by you.. do you mean “with”? … or was she next door?
@@ms.hjohnson6820 it meant grill, in jamaica 🇯🇲 we grill our houses. she did tell me she was coming to jamaica but I had no idea she was planning to stay at my house.
@@ms.hjohnson6820 I didn't really understand the comment either, I'm like who pops in town to use someone's grill.
@@bellaapple2166 😂😂
@@joanhall3808 You grill your house in Jamaica?? Is that putting on a fly screen door?
Okay, I understand that she stayed with you. Hell to the no on that!! That sucks bc she puts you in a difficult position of having to turn her away and ruin the friendship, or, dishonour yourself and let her in for fear of ruining the friendship. That’s a loose loose. Sorry that happened :/ yikes
It’s common in Norway to spend weekend at someone’s house when visiting someone who lives far away from you. This can be really nice IF no one overspends their welcome, and the guest shows gratitude, is wiling to partake economically and help out with everyday chores etc.
I live in rather small apartment with two female flatmates. We are all students with exams and such to concider, so when someone wants to stay over we really have to check in and make sure all three are okay with it. I’ll usually be okay with short time visitors, but there is a difference between when I am the one hosting vs. when my flatmates are the ones responsible for the guest. If my flatmates are the ones responsible, I usually won’t mind having a guest over a few nights, and I don’t really mind being the host as long as it doesn’t crash with the times when I’m the busiest.
We live in the capital, and I have several friends who lives elsewhere but take on gigs here from time to time. Some of them only need to spend a night or two, which is usually fine (- They just need a couch to crash on and not much attention from us otherwise,) but we’ve had people stay for a month and that was a lot.. Also, certain people are much easier to house than others: like what A said about there being people whom you feel like you have to entertain and do every single thing with and for them, whilst others are very autonomous. Some guests buy their own food and clean their dishes etc, whilst others truly act like they’re staying at a hotel.
We had this one guest who stayed with us for several weeks without ever buying any groceries. The reason this felt a bit economically invasive is because all three of us who live in this apartment are students, whilst SHE was staying with us to WORK without having to spend money rent a place. It felt a bit like the “You give an inch and they take a mile”-situation. If the roles were reversed, and I the one working and in a stronger financial situates than her, I wouldn’t have minded it. But it made me realize how important it is to not take blessings and peoples kindness for granted, and to be aware of others circumstances.
Another guest I had: He came over in the evening and i set up a bed from him in the living room. I understood that he hadn’t brought any food for breakfast (which was perfectly fine since he was only staying one night) and told him where the different foods are and that he can take whatever he needs in the morning (because I like sleeping in and wont wake up to cook for this grown man. Also: this guy had been at out place several times before. ) I woke up at 11:30, and this man had been awake and hungry since 07:30 without eating anything. I felt guilty,, even though I had warned him that he would have to make his own breakfast. Whenever this person stays over, I know now that I’ll be responsible from his meals and to entertain him, because he’s shy and awkward, and wont dare to do anything on his own. He is someone whom I can’t have staying over when I can’t make time to take care of him.
So the lesson is: As a guest, show consideration and gratitude. If you stay for several nights, be even more considerate: offer to split bills or pay for groceries if you can, try to help out with chores where you can. At the very least be autonomous enough to be able to make yourself a meal and not be totally reliant on the host - cuz she ain’t your mama.
Also, I know some people can be reluctant to take others food because they want to be considerate (which is actually very sweet), and in those situations it can be wise to bring a little something: Either a snack for yourself to munch on when hungry or something that you bring to the household so that you don’t just “take” their food but you are also contributing. But if you’re hungry and someone tells you that you can take some food, it really is okay to do so, (as long as you don’t go bananas or literally steal from them.)
Jameeeeeeessssssssss! 😂 😂 😂 😂. That was very funny! Thanks for making me laugh today Loni! 💕
I don't know how this went from bad house guest to James. 🙄😴.
I liked this episode, lol. Cause EVERYbody is different about the way they handle guests! 😂
People know I have a kid so they avoid us 😂
Sorry to say but people do avoid guests with kids like hell. They imagine their home will be upside down and they don't have power to discipline your child, it's also more expensive coz it's 2 mouths to feed
I love sleep overs but I guess that fades for some people lol
Love Kandi's shoes
That story about James SENT me!
James walked right back into that truck 😂
Im not a houseguest (i like my privacy) but i love my culture for its houseguest culture excluding the extremes. We dont charge people etc
Unwanted guests? Absolutely NOT. I also have rules. IF you are invited, you can't stay for more than 3 days AND you have to be tested for covid. That's just to be able to sleep here. There are more rules once you are allowed. Lol. If that doesn't sound appealing, go to a hotel ✌🏼
James!!!! Nooooo! 😮😲😳😆🤣🤣😂
Kandi and the lady who said Todd was on the come up. Kandi gave her a thorough finishing
Uncle James aint no punk....well...lmao
Omg Kandi you have two mansions next two each other just have them stay in the other house and you never have to see them if you don’t want to. Also I agree with Kandi everyone isn’t Michelle Obama if you go low I’ll go lower me being the bigger person won’t teach you nothing
This!! If I was rich I'd have a mega house or two houses right next to each other. I'm an introvert and my home vibes are my everything so its not that I don't like my family, I just don't like people funking up my space with their various energies. We can hang out for some period of time but after that, I need my own space. Oh the problems being rich would solve.
I totally agree.. some people need to learn for the next time, if there's a next time for us.
I'm a really really nice Taurus but don't disrespect me cause it won't be good for you... I don't play like that.
@@egyptscott4801 Some people just don’t understand. I’m a Leo but a Taurus moon. Comfort and vibes are everything. Please do not disrupt my peace it won’t be pretty 🔪
I’m unfollowing you, I’m not gonna deal with this. Givenchy
💀😂😂😂
Maybe it’s me but I just don’t like to stay over at someone’s house when I happen to be on my period that time LOL 🤷🏽♀️
I am in love with Kandi
A month is ridiculous! I see a week, a month...get a hotel..
There's no place for anyone to stay at my house. I don't entertain anyway. I don't have that problem.
how can I find the way out of this troublesome situation...✈️
Dang, well when I didn't have kids I'd always go visit my siblings from out of town. And I'd stay with them, never thinking twice about it. Now that I'm married with kids, I'd feel like it's too much. I guess I should had been more respectful, and asked. I'm the youngest and I'd assume I'd always have a place to call home when I visit family.
Not the Givenchy 💀🤚🏼😂
My soon to be ex husband had no shame about asking to stay over at people’s houses. I think if you come from a close family where it isn’t an issue, it’s okay, but I would feel strange asking a friend to accommodate me.
Anything beyond a week feels a bit too long if you aren’t making the trip to spend time with the person and with an invitation.
Yeah, I stayed at a friend's family house for a couple of days during a hurricane watch. I ate all the meals with them and even made conversation with them and I then chilled in the room they gave me because I'm an introvert. Then my friend came at me like you need to apologize to my parents because they are offended. I was like seriously? I then sat uncomfortably with the family, but I refused to apologize cause now you made me uncomfortable when you're the one that invited me over and it's the way you went about it. How about knocking on my door and saying, " Hey the kids are playing a game, would you like to join?" that would be less awkward than you sending your son over to tell me your offend cause I'm not hanging out with you. I'm still cool with the mom, but yeah never sleeping over there again next hurricane watch I'll just stay home lol
Omg the james story 🤣🤣🤣
This new generation where people don’t want to talk laugh with family and friends stay with them it’s just not it! what is wrong with communication talking over breakfast having sleepovers
,like I really don’t understand this new generation everything is bad and negative.
You and James need a show!!!!! Please
I’m with Adrienne on this.
I love my Birthday tiwn kandi ♉️👑❤️❤️❤️🎉🎊💯🤣
James bless him
I love kandi.. my husband friends does the samething lol.. I took notes.
People shouldn't come to town without having a place to stay
I can see Loni being that person dropping in .
Lmao 😂
@@bsbgirl85 what
I hate having people stay over at the house specially my nieces and nephews they trash up the house and they are very loud and annoying it’s not even my house I’m ready to have my own place I don’t want people staying over at my house not even a month like i am a person who doesn’t like living with people who are messy
Adrienne, a word. 🗣
🤣 taking away James street cred with that story poor man going to get squared up more often now