Should A Woman Make The First Move?

Should a woman make the first move on a man when dating? If you'd like more dating and relationship tips, sign up at modernlove.life...
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Should a woman make the first move? There is often a misconception in the dating world that being passive is the same as being feminine.
Don't get me wrong, of course, it would be NICE if the man would make the first move, but in many instances this just will not happen.
For better or worse, most men are not in the habit of approaching women that they are attracted to.
Which means that if you only wait for men to approach you, you will only be approached by men who typically approach women -- primarily players, pickup artists, and occasionally very friendly men.
There is nothing wrong with this, just know that you will likely have to weed through a great deal of players and pickup artists in order to find the right guy for you.
Or... you could realize that being feminine is not the same as being passive. It can take a more proactive role in making connections with men who seem interesting to you.
This of course doesn't mean that you need to approach a man with desperation or neediness. Simply strike up a conversation and see if he seems interesting.
Remain emotionally uninvested and explore if he is the kind of man you may actually want to get to know better.
Once he sees that you are friendly, he may actually take the initiative and ask you out.
**** IMPORTANT ****
This is an internet video, and it should be obvious, but this video and other videos on this channel should not be taken as a substitute for the evaluation of a psychologist, therapist, counselor, etc. This video and other videos on this channel are intended for informational uses only, and only reflect the personal opinions of the creator. The creator of this video is not responsible for your actions or choices or the consequences of your actions or choices.

[@ClayAndrews]

Thanks for watching this video. If you'd like more dating advice, be sure to sign up over at: modernlove.life/quiz

[@davidnyro19]

Absolutely spot-on observation about passive=female. "Feminine Mystique," etc. I also know, from actual conversations with many women, many feel like ALL men are always on the make and so they, the women, are almost always in "defense mode" thinking all guys have that hidden agenda. Yes, there are a lot "pick-up artists" and guys on the make, but it's not all guys. But it's understandable that women are on alert or defensive with all the "hits" they get, from the rude, sexist catcalls they get on the street to the fact that nearly every woman I've ever known well has been sexually harassed, assaulted, raped, etc.
Is it any wonder women are "on guard" and even worrying about their safety? Women have a whole other reality than most/all men; they have to think and act differently about so many things, from where they jog, and when, to where they park their car, what they wear, what they say, and on and on and on. Things guys don't even think about. Not part of our reality.
So what we end up with is a lot of stalemate, difficult, conflicted scenarios: women and men being apprehensive - with good reason and understandable - and why we need alcohol - liquid courage - and such, in bar situations to overcome these fears and concerns, or the relative safety/facade/insulation of online dating, or other modes to engage. Sometimes I think it's a wonder ANYONE ever hooks up, but the answer there is that our drives to connect, those chemicals and our reptile brains and Darwin, are SO powerful that they can overcome a lot of these fears, insecurities, and so on.
I concur with Clay in that a lot of men - good, decent men - might be interested in a woman, but will not approach. If that lack of confidence, shyness, etc., rules that guy out in that particular woman's mind, as Clay touches on, fine. But I think Clay's guidance is valuable that women should consider letting a guy know they're at least open to conversation. Clay's right in that men rarely get approached by an interested woman. Sure, that woman might face rejection, but that's something guys have had to deal with forever: rejection by women. "Welcome to the club!" If you're a woman that can't handle any kind of rejection, then this wouldn't be the tactic for you; though I would gently suggest you examine your own issues around rejection. That's probably not something that serves you. Doesn't serve anyone to live in the reality of always fearing being rejected. We miss out on things. We miss out on opportunities. Yes, we might avoid some pain, some loss, but we miss out on life. Good luck, everyone, and don't forget to walk in other's shoes!

[@dreamer75438]

I know your comment is 3 years old but just want to tell u that I enjoyed reading it. I think you are very intelligent and understanding. Yes, women are on high alert a lot of times. You have no idea how many times I've been followed. I just wanted to let you know that just bc a woman doesn't ask a guy out, it doesn't mean she fears rejection. I'm a southern Christian woman and we were taught that a man pursues. I will throw out signals, lots of signals but won't pursue bc I believe a man should lead. Thank u for your comment and input

[@BrayzenPaddles]

No.

[@lazybill5830]

More women could approach men.
Looking for a girlfriend I don't want marriage or kids.
Well I am curious to see what happens.

[@dreamer75438]

You will learn a lot about a man by not pursuing and watching what he does and u have just proven why a lot of women don't pursue. You want a girlfriend but not marriage or kids. A classy intelligent woman knows if a guy doesn't pursue he is indecisive, not serious, not that terested. Do u want to get laid? Are you expecting a woman to initiate sex? Will she be called too "easy"? No woman will fall in your lap

[@lazybill5830]

@@dreamer75438 You decided to reply to me, I'd say I'm on the right track.

[@simoneracioppa5733]

Yeah, actually I want to see them fail and be depressed. If some girl or female approaches me I will reject her so badly that she will run away crying like a baby.

[@windmill676]

Should i contact him? Although hes the one who dumped me?

[@ClayAndrews]

It doesn't matter who would initiate the contact. What is important is that we have healed from the past and removed our self from being in Damage Control mode. At the same time, we are detached from any form of outcomes and in acceptance of any results.

[@windmill676]

Clay Andrews thank you for your response. We just broke up last month after of 8 years of relationship. He just dumped me so easily

[@almsg2051]

No. Men chase if they’re interested. If not, moving on

[@brodemfamalam7178]

🤦🏾‍♂️

[@almsg2051]

@@brodemfamalam7178 I’m allowing the men to step into their masculine energy..... I can strike a conversation but I will expect the man to make the first move which equals interest

[@clementex2]

@@almsg2051 Any men with some sort of self respect wont chase, they dont view women as someone to conquer but a fellow individual. If you expect men to chase, you will only get players because chasing is what they are good at. But thanks for filtering yourself out because now a high value woman who approach and make the first move can be with those very men with self respect.

[@vedanshsingh5251]

@@almsg2051 so easy of you to define what masculinity is when you aren't even a man.

[@almsg2051]

@@clementex2 would it had triggered you less if I said that men pursue when interested. My point is semantics matter and casting all that judgment for a high value woman does not benefit you….

[@gerardoa9179]

No, thats a masculine behavior