I made an algorithm to run through my photos and put all the pet pics in one album… 11k and counting in only five years. I have ocd and find it hard to delete pictures, so safe to say I think I understand the wife on that front lol 😔🙏
I wrote a 23 page research article on the neuroanatomical signatures of hyperphantasia in youth, including sections on materials, measurements, results, limitations, and recommendations. And my non-researcher husband read every damn word of it lol
my bf studies in a field I understand nothing about and I still read everything important he writes... its just caring about you partner's time and passions
I was never lucky enough to find a partner who took interest in my work, but I sure am lucky enough to have a dad obsessed with it, showing me what it's like for someone to value your professional side. Thanks, dad! To all the girl dads out there: make sure your kid knows what love and appreciation look like, so they don't end up on reddit threads like these✌
If you don’t mind to share the title and where to find it (TH-cam tends to delete comments with links), I’d appreciate it very much! As someone who developed a weirdly vivid and immersive imagination as a kid (probably as a result of my innate ADHD and nurtured trauma and dissociation), the term hyperphantasia surely perked my ears up
she coouuuuuuld be a spam picture taker. maybe she takes multiple photos and multiple angles… and then painstakingly sorts them all into a dedicated album… i’m trying my best here
That's what makes me think it's just a quick photo before she falls asleep and then when she wakes up, or maybe there are duplicates from one night he looked cute and she took like 3-5. Not to overly justify that, it's pretty strange to have so many, but that's just the only thing I can think of. I take the occasional photo of my partner in the morning every few weeks, or if they're napping, especially if our pets are with them.
Haha this is great. When I came out to my husband he then went and found a bunch of articles that talk about how awesome it is to be married to someone who's bisexual 😄
That's D'Angelo's take on the situation. Dave, however, cannot have a take on the situation since he used to immediately resort to violence on the drama that took place on real Greek forums 500 years ago.
Alas, we shall never know what take Dave had on today’s video. Much like fans of Timothée Chalamet, we need to accept that we have no control over our idol and whether or not Dave chooses to bless us with a take in any given video is up to him. 😝
Remember guys, marriage won’t fix your relationship it’ll only make it harder to leave Soo only get married if you truly want to live your life with that person 😊
oh! and I completely forgot-bringing other people into the picture (making your relationship open or poly) to “fix” things just makes them harder too! If you’re having problems communicating or working with 1 person, adding others into the mix WILL NOT MAKE THAT EASIER.
@@eleventhclara Right??? Don't bring someone into your horror house in the hopes that they'll fix it. So many people looking for poly relationships end up being the newly assigned therapist who isn't being paid and has to deal with alllllllll the emotional fall out.
My wife wants me to read her book and I refuse. I just don't think I'd like it. But when I hear about it I don't say shit. Not my genre, not my book, and Iove her. Of course I'd never say anything bad about it. Especially without even reading it!
@@darkkit1994but you don't like your wife enough to think that you might like things about the book that she wrote? That's what's so confusing to me. Do you not believe that the author influences the work? Are you *actually* scared that you'll think it's badly made and you don't want to have to lie about her skill? Just "I'm not interested in the genre" is such a bs excuse to not *read one book that your partner created*.
@@keladry12you can like someone and not be the same person and have different likes and interests, unless you want to date your mirror image which sounds boring
After my husband passed away, I discovered he had a file within a file labeled, "Other Pics." I was screen-sharing at the time with a local organization's president who he had been volunteering with. The main file was their documents and photos. I was helping them get files he was working on when he passed. I opened the file and found mildly zoomed in butt pics. There are SO many butts. He was not a 'butt guy'. I was shocked, confused, and suddenly concerned. The person watching my screen gasped. I immediately stopped sharing and excused myself. The deep dive into the folder made me nervous. I'd heard horror stories from other widows, but it had been months, and nothing sketchy had popped up. We were in love, and he was a stand-up guy. I could tell they were candid shots. The locations and outfits were different. It took me a few minutes to realize they were ALL of me. I've never taken pics of my own butt from a distance, but apparently, he had. I'm not sure he ever intended me to see them. While it was weird, it was mostly funny and a bit sweet. I didn't go through any of the rest of his files. We were always careful with each other's privacy. I'm glad I found the pics. It was like he was winking at me from the great beyond. The org's president and I had a good laugh about it later. I deleted the file and live on knowing that while he may not have been a 'butt guy', he sure liked mine.
It aggravates me so much when someone acts unprofessional, but then when you react understandably confused or annoyed, they call *you* unprofessional. It seems for a lot of these egomaniacs "professionalism" just means sucking up to them
"shane" is so blatantly unprofessional in that conversation, meanwhile OP was actually very kind, courteous and professional given the circumstances. I want to rip my hair out
Idk maybe she applied to a scammy job listing or something. Her replies were soo polite but he still managed to get annoyed about it, made it seem like he had a too good to be true opportunity she was missing out on?! But then again a scammer would probably be more keen to respond lol
I love having D'Angelo curate this subreddit for me, I stg half the time the posts are like, "am I overreacting to my husband stabbing me 28 times a few minutes ago?"
@oDM0o hey I was actually in Detroit twice in the past 5-6 years for concerts and it was actually quite nice and not scary. The only issue I had was stumbling upon human feces near a statue while playing pokemon go 😂 that was quite a shock
the skinny dipping one is crazy, the wife was literally like why do you have to be naked and they both brushed it off. definitely something happening between them... poor lady
that's what i thought! like people who are just so so opposed to reading as if it burns are so silly, (and don't have any condition that makes it unpleasant) so much that when your Wife PLEADS for you to read her book you just shut her down? it gave off the feeling that he didn't believe in her and thought it was gonna be bad, so he didn't even attempt to humor her. also with all the advice and stuff. yall talk about boundaries as if reading YOUR WIFES BOOK BC SHE ASKED YOU TO and she values your input was the biggest sacrifice 😭 it's possibly one of the most harmless things you could do!! why are we validating him when his attitude sucks?
@@mim_mimm legit. I’m writing a book right now and i have friends who don’t even like reading that much and are willing to read it just because i wrote it! Lol. And i wouldn’t even expect them to. Like books are not that big of a time commitment. Just take 30 mins out of your day and read for 30 mins. No one is saying he has to read the entire book in one day
@@Spracker333 I don't know. I have friends that want to read but never actually manage to finish a book. I love reading, but I only read about 3 books a month and find it really really hard to to that. And if you recommend me a series or movie, it will likely take me years to watch that. That you personally find it easy to do something doesn't mean that it's easy for everyone.
I think the husband that wont read the book is in the wrong. It's not about enjoying the book its about supporting your partner. My partner reads all my school papers and he doesnt care about the subject but he knows its important to me so he reads them. Obviously a book is bigger than a few essays but still spend a few hours at least reading part of it just to support your spouse.
I read my husband's research papers, including his mind-numbing work term reports, and work he was actually proud of, because it was important to him. I think you should show up for your partner the way they want to be shown up for, not the way that feels natural to you. 🤷♀️ Reading an entire manuscript is a big commitment, but he could have compromised and offered to read a chapter or an excerpt, and I am sure it would have meant the world to her.
@@nad_bell_ that's what I'm saying! Like I can't imagine my partner writing a whole book they are proud of and me refusing to read any of it?? I get maybe not the whole thing but man's can't even skim the first chapter? I would be devastated!
I understand supporting your partner. However, as someone who has read stuff people who are important to me have written in a genre I have no connection to, you can deeply hurt feelings by mistake. Does the person want notes? If not you might be fine to have just read it and it's not your genre. But reading someone's art that is not a genre that you are not connected to can be a minefield. I'm always proud of someone for writing a book. However, because writing a book is very personal and tough "I'm really proud of you for writing a book" can feel dismissive to people (or at least that's what I've had people tell me) I always want to be supportive of people I love. However, I sometimes don't know the right way to do so that doesn't hurt feelings if they are doing something I don't have a connection to. That being said, the guy in the story is not being supportive IMHO
This. I quite literally have dyslexia, I struggle immensely to read more than a few sentences but when my partner has asked me to read his law assignments I’ve done my best to read through it. They want my opinion and to show off their work, and I love being able to do that. For the long papers I’ve started putting them on txt to speech so I can actually absorb what’s happening. Being supportive should not be a chore
Seriously why is it on r/aita alone a quarter of the stories are women questioning if they're being a holes for not wanting to put up with their lazy manchild husbands/bfs? I mean...we know why. But the misogyny still leaves me awestruck in horror.
unless the stories are fakes. but from my own experiences 3 out of 4 boyfriends have been pretty much a ‘’man-child’’ in the relationship dynamic, so i don’t think it is too unlikely that many other women have dealt with it too
I think aita is a modern version of gossip circles from women in history. The circles they outlawed and deemed witch craft. Women's social network is their biggest safety measure. When a woman in a bad relationship has been isolated, or if her social circle is equally unhealthy, reddit can be their first reference of healthy and normal. Most people who're being abused have some level of instinct that their treatment is wrong. One stranger online can feed that instinct enough to leave.
The getaway-trip husband feeling like that is so valid… but in adulthood it is SO HARD to even just grab a cup of coffee with your besties unless you’re blessed with the same zip code. Also, if someone surprised me with a wholeass trip, I’d be so conflicted 😅 But then again, I got the autism that hates abrupt plan changes.
My autistic self had the same thought like. I'd much prefer to go on a planned trip than a surprise one, even if I'd normally prefer to go with the other person. I need to be prepared and I hate hate HATE abrupt changes in schedule. I don't plan much because if I did it would drive me bonkers every single time someone I love with good intentions would make plans not realizing they've accidentally added 15 layers of stress. Hoping OP and them did go on a nice trip later that everyone had time to put together.
yes :( like i'm sorry but a planned trip with multiple friends?? it might be rude to my husband but i think it would be ruder for me to cancel on All my friends (like consider the schedule changes abd sacrifices they all had to make, etc.) because my husband wanted to surprise me without asking if i was free he's not overreacting but in married life you tend to lose connection with friends bc you often don't make time for them while prioritizing your partner, and putting it off when you do have the plans... idk
@@softestshade7813 I hope so too! Obvi can't speak for them, but my attempt at a solution would be a sort of compromise. I'd try to follow through with friends and make some sort of special effort to spend time with husband later. Then again, it's just hard for me to imagine being with a partner who would be unaware of my immense discomfort with something like "surprise! we're going to Cancun weekend!" 😅
@@mim_mimm Agree with you 100%! It's like Trolley Problem: Vacation Edition. 😅 Postponing a getaway with my 1 highly-trusted life partner (whom I see every day, and presumably knows how little time I get to relax with friends) makes more sense than canceling on a complex multi-person trip that my friends went through the trouble to plan for my birthday.
@@Ghost-lt4sf Fr!! My boyfriend is also autistic so we only to get roped into social outings together from other people! The most “surprise” I ever get out of him is that he brought home snacks for us 😭 Maybe this is just a sign to be grateful for what I’ve got lol
The photos aren’t necessarily creepy, I take photos or videos of my husband too when he sleeps but I almost always show them because I think it’s cute. But her not showing him and the amount of photos is really weird. I have OCD and that OCD comment could be possible, but if she doesn’t have OCD it seems really weird.
Exactly this. Or if I'm video calling with my partner and the screen freezes with him making a funny expression, I'll screenshot it and then immediately send it to him so he can share in the laugh. He does the same to me. I feel the weird part is the sheer volume of photos, and that she wasn't showing them to him.
Yea for real looking at the love of your life sleeping thinking theyre so pretty is NORMAL ??? Thats a sign of love you're married its not creepy to take pics of them at all.
@@93runninggiraffes Yes the amount and her not telling him made it weird, but I literally have thousands of photos of my husband and some of them are like also do screenshots of FaceTime conversations. But he knows because I send them and tell him how cute or funny the photo is.
@@christopherbrown5409 no it isnt. He is my husband, if he thinks i look cute sleeping that's adorable. Although i look terrible in the pictures. He cant show them to anyone obv.
I think physical appearance is separate from pretty much divorced from actual values, like when i see people act in ways that are kind it kinda shapes my "type", it's important to know a person to lol
I think the big thing is that she never told him about these photos. I have taken photos of certain family members (like my dad) while they were sleeping because they were doing something cute, like cuddling with one of our pets or something. But once they wake up, I show them the photo and ask if they want me to delete it or something. I also don't share the photo without their permission. It's also a subtle way of gauging their comfort levels and seeing if they are generally uncomfortable with this kind of thing. The fact that she never made him aware of these photos is concerning to me.
My son is the most beautiful sleeper ever so I do have a bunch of pics of him sleeping but he is very aware that I have them and at 20 I don’t have more than 100 of them.
I think this is a valid point, but I also think it’s the volume. I might take a picture of someone while they’re sleeping because they’re doing something cute, like you said, and then forget about it and never bring it up. She took these THOUSANDS of pictures, put them in an album, AND kept it a secret. Even if she took a few secret or forgotten photos, I’d be like, okay, interesting… but thousands is intense.
@@U5678-hl7oi A thousands is intense yeah. Though it has been 11 years, but still. I love taking pics of my girlfriend (shes always cute) and even I don’t have that many 😭 and she deletes the ones she doesn’t like and I’m not allowed to post anything without permission. There are ways to make your partner feel comfortable about snapping photos, and hiding them isn’t it
Maybe the hunky british guy knew they had incompatible stars signs and at that point he just knew he could not hold up the charade no longer, now he knows she was into them. So had to slip his Hugo boss shirt over his rippling abs and run off into a rain storm, with one glance back before never being seen again.
Some people are legitimately so easy to manipulate and gaslight or they will just believe anything someone tells them or that they read online 😭😭 When it's a result of abuse or a really bad upbringing or being 22 years old (💀) I can forgive the naivety because they just don't KNOW, but then there are others who just straight up don't BOTHER to think for themselves and don't even bother to consider what their values and opinions are and it's both maddening and sad
I got so mad when the book lady said she knew she overreacted and had apologized to her husband. GIRL YOU DID NOTHING WRONG DON'T LISTEN TO THE NECKBEARDS
i'm kinda icked by the second. Romantasy is not a hard to read genre, the fact that husbad didn't even bother to read even the first few chapters is very sad. As a hobby-writer i would be so upset. I think it's heartbreaking how little somebody's life partner cares about something that makes their partner happy.
i think the romance genres are some of the hardest to read. it can get cringey so easily. i rarely read them, and get tired of them very easily, it's just taste. maybe the dude just don't like reading because he can't picture things in his head, or has a hard time with literacy, or hates narrative driven stories. idk. it's still icky that he wouldn't at least try and then honestly say it's not for him.
Given how... 'TMI about what the author's into' some romance writing can be, I can kind of sympathize with the husband not wanting to read it. Imagine reading a sex scene between the maiden and the werewolf, and you _recognize_ it.
True, he could’ve sucked it up, read it and made her so happy. I’d be super interested to read something if I knew who wrote it… unless it was a family member who wrote something romancsy lol
@Eloraurora I feel like having your partner write out their fantasies like that is literally like receiving a manual on how to take sex to the next level for them. That's the opposite of a problem imo
@@cousinmajin I guess I was thinking in terms of publishing. If the book stays within the relationship, or is published anonymously, it feels less weird; no chance of some acquaintance going, "Just finished your wife's book." 😏
"If HBO contacted me by texting me 'lol sup?' like you did, I would similarly assume it was a creepy guy trying to pick me up and brush them off. But HBO doesn't do that, Shane. Only you reach out to people in such an unprofessional way that you sound like a creep. Seek professional help, and I don't mean HR."
18:03 if someone "surprised" me with a trip the day of, i would probably throw up lol. i need 24hr notice for anything that requires me to leave my house
The man who said he had no serious issues but he wants to leave his wife over the series of pictures she took while he was sleeping. I don't believe they haven't had any other serious issues because yeah it's creepy very very creepy but also three children 11 years, there's other reasons why you want to leave this woman. I cannot think it's just because of the creepy photos. There must be other creepy behavior. Or misaligned beliefs or some s***
I mean- he could have also been forgotten what having serious issues in a relationship is like, which is why he would overreact and jump to divorce.. when you've had no serious issues for 11 years, you probably assume you never will, so having something like this come up could be really concerning/alarming, and he might have just jumped to the worst case scenario
I don't know man he mentioned being afraid of sleeping next to her, when something messes with your feeling of safety when sleeping things can go from 0 to 100 super fast.
Definitely super crazy. It was giving vibes like he just took their information from their resume and was reaching out to them on his own accord. He said he was told to reach out but not until pretty deep into the convo which is so sketch!
Yep! I don’t understand why she didn’t kick the friend out and the husband, for good measure. I guarantee they are already sleeping together or having an emotional affair at the very least.
Right? That's clearly against the agreements of their relationship from the way she's describing things, and both the best friend and husband know damn well it's not the same as when they went skinny dipping in a big group together. I would be so hurt if my partner chose to do something so blatantly in front of me of ANY kind that was something they knew would hurt me so badly, and we had both agreed is a thing just for us, like hanging out naked alone.. I could give them the benefit of the doubt somewhat if they hadn't gone out of their way to avoid checking in with OP until after she blew up in frustration, too, instead waiting until she had to have such a large reaction to get their attention. Why couldn't they have cared when she asked them why they kept wanting the stakes to be nudity? Or when she left from a mixture of not feeling well and being uncomfortable? Or when she came back to check on them? YIKES, the disrespect from them both towards OP is astounding.
Only vaguely related to the random text story-when I was in high school I got a random text from an unknown number and I was like “hey sorry you have the wrong number!” and then THEY responded saying “what the hell are you talking about??” and then for the next few class periods we were arguing back and forth between breaks on who had gotten whose number and who had texted first, until I brought it up with a classmate in my creative writing class who I had done mock trial with the year before. As it turns out, for some reason I received a text that she had sent me THE YEAR BEFORE as if she had just sent it-and obviously, since we didn’t text about anything but the case which was now over, she had since deleted the conversation long before. So from my phone, it looked like she had sent me a text out of nowhere. From her phone, it looked like I had sent her a text out of nowhere. I still have no idea how that happened or why, but it was truly an insane couple of hours.
there was a period of like a few days in the mid 2000s where people who were customers of a certain cellular provider were receiving texts from over a year prior. it was a huge number of people, you can look it up online. people were receiving texts from loved ones numbers who had since passed, etc. i think i was in high school at the time as well so it was likely between 2006-2010, probably.
23:41 Shane is 100% a scammer haha, he didn’t offer any details linking him to any company, OP was the one who divulged that they applied for the internship
The internship one is so dumb bc no professional company will text, let alone text in that manner. I’ve never had a job reach out via text, only email & phone call where they state who they are & the company they represent. Valid to assume it’s a scam if you get a text from a random number saying “hi” w/ no additional context
Yeah, so, when soneone you love pours an extraordinary amount of work into something, even if it's not your 'thing', your a$$ better show up & appreciate it. You watch the sport game even if you don't sport. You take time to appreciate their art even if you don't art. And you read the book, paper. Novella, short story, even if you don't read. If you truly love someone you should be there to celebrate their wins. You don't need to love their thing, you just need to love them. And this is one of the many many reasons my 2nd marriage ended. So, now I'm twice divorced, which means I'm extra fancy, lol
I kinda agree. Even if it takes 10-15 hours to read, this is one of her greatest achievements of the past few years. It's a small sacrifice relative to how much this probably means to her.
Ehhh I half disagree. There are plenty of other ways to show support encouragement and appreciation for someone outside of directly engaging in that thing. I generally avoiding reading, even when it’s my loves ones writing, because I have dyslexia (and a vision issue on top of that tbh) which makes reading a miserable and frustrating experience.
right! like i dont care for sports but if my partner is playing for a sport team hes passionate about, i’ll show up and support him because i know it means a lot to him and im genuinely interested in his interests
10:57 I am a writer and tbh I would probably break up with someone if they did not put in the effort to read something I labored so long over, that was so important to me. ESPECIALLY if they kept trying to making edit suggestions without having read it!!!
Yeah, I feel like it's a little bit one or the other. I know a lot of people who struggle to sit down and read whole books, especially if it's not a genre they're into, so I could see being with someone who might not read the whole book right away (though I'd appreciate them making an effort for it), but... If you're not gonna read the context, how could you even make editing or story suggestions? You can't properly tell what works and what doesn't without reading it, so if it's beyond the brainstorming stage and there is a text, then either read the text or be increeedibly respectful about any suggestions...
I'm a software engineer and I wouldn't dream of expecting my wife to give a shit about the software I write. Just because your job results in an output that many consume as a hobby, that doesn't entitle you to universal engagement. Sure, the edit suggestions aspect is weird, but doesn't even make sense if he's refusing to read it. Not just the "why" but the "how".
Why can’t a loving partner support your work and efforts without reading your work? I personally cringe when reading romance novels, I’m not going to like it no matter how great the writing is. My husband writes short stories as a hobby. I’ve read some of his works but not all of them. I show my support by bringing him tea and snacks while he’s writing.
As someone with ocd I do get it ngl. I have to take a photo of my cat everyday or something will happen. Obviously 9,000 photos is crazy but I also kinda understand
Yeah but you get the difference between a cat and a human being right? If she was doing this without his consent, and actively trying to hide it from him, then that is incredibly problematic. OCD might be a reason but it is certainly not an excuse to do it.
Not at all minimizing your OCD and having intrusive thoughts about what would happen if you didn’t, but taking a picture of your cat everyday is such a mood. How can you have cats and be like “no photos for me?” 😂❤
@@Marc-nw9mpWhat’s the difference? They’re both family members and if the OCD says you have to take a picture of them or they’ll die, that’s the same compulsion. The difference is that cats wouldn’t get creeped out by you having photos of them, but if it really is an OCD thing it makes sense that she might be embarrassed or even afraid to tell him about the photos, like if she feels like something will happen to him if he knows about the photos or if she’s just embarrassed by the OCD and isn’t ready to talk about it especially in a context where she’d be admitting to violating someone’s privacy in a way.
8:43 So as a writer with a “not really a reader partner” I’ve found that sharing bits a pieces/infodumping is a fun compromise. I talk about my books for a bit and then he tells me about horror movies and we have a good time
I did a good surprise once: bc the trip wasn't the surprise. The location was. I cleared the wkend w/ them then said we were going away & the weather where we were going. But I didn't tell them the location. That part was a surprise. It went over really well!
Thats so nice of you! My boyfriend surprised me like that and also told me we've already been there. I have PTSD and am very fast triggered so he did everything he could to make the surprise nice for me. It was such a nice time and I like to remember it.
As an adult, surprises will only really work if it’s small. A surprise gift, maybe a surprise movie night (when both parties were just gonna do nothing), but a surprise trip??? That’s way too much in a schedule to not need time to accommodate for. Least the guy was trying to do good instead of what usually happens with girls trip posts?
I surprised a friend with a promise to buy tickets to a museum once we work out a date. That's about as "surprise trip" as it gets for us grown ups. Maybe if the trip is a life dream with a limited timeframe, like the Beyonce Renaissance tour, and you give them the tickets months in advance so they can plan for it.
Quite possibly. Scammer, or at minimum a slightly toxic workplace. That would be my assumption. Nice big red flag right at the start... Which is actually rather helpful of him lol. Accidental-GG shane let OP know to avoid that company.
Seeing my husband and my best friend being naked and splashing each other water in a pool = Getting a divorce right away, no questions asked!!! This one is probably the only actually SERIOUS case among all the posts mentioned here in this video. I simply just would NOT accept this disrespectful behavior! No mater how long I have been married to my husband or known this friend. So no, it's not overreacting at all! The fact that the wife here has to ask if she is overreacting, tells me that she has already probably been emotionally neglected and abused by her husband for many years. She needs to leave him, ASAP!!! Otherwise worse things will definitely happen. The next thing you will see very soon would be he and your friend being naked playing with each other in bed...
15:40 Dude, the guy said she planned the girl's trip first, and he didn't tell her about his plans until after she asked him if he was ok with her leaving. This is totally on him.
Your rant about surprises was so real. I hate surprises and had to tell everyone I know not to give me any surprise gifts because they’re usually underwhelming and not knowing what I will get gives me anxiety.
2:19 Best case scenario: the photos are or are the equivalent of Live Photos on an iPhone and his wife has been concerned her husband may have sleep apnea
As someone with ASD the amount of information paradox is so infuriating!!! I naturally just give too much detail bc my brain sees it as relevant, and people think that's dishonest, but then if you dont tell them enough, then its also perceived that way? 😂 There's just no winning. someone will think you're lying no matter what!
Reading a book YOUR PARTNER wrote is not that huge of a commitment, honestly. Showing interest in what your partner is doing is literally the bare minimum, and writing your first book is *monumental* . It takes so much work and dedication, and when you finish it, it's not only one of the best feelings in the world, it's also a giant accomplishment. I'd be so hurt if my partner refused to read it. I just finished my first book and all my friends and family- some of them aren't readers at all, some of them don't like the genre I wrote- excitedly offered me to proof read it and told me how excited they were to read it. The thing is, I don't expect this from my friends, but I would absolutely expect this from family and a partner. He doesn't have to read every single book she writes. But the first one? Come on. Even if you aren't a reader, can't you just suck it up this one time for her? If you can't even commit to reading ONE book for your partner, that's sad, and if I was the one refusing to read my husband's first book that he's so excited about because I can't be bothered to, I'd be REALLY embarrassed to see that even casual friends who aren't big readers themselves are willing to. Think of a different scenario: a man gets to play soccer in the world cup for the first time, but his wife hates sports and doesn't watch a single one of his games.
The dude whose wife chose girls' trip got the hard end of birthday surprises. Her friends knew she needed time with friends, while he failed to ask if his surprise was something she wanted. It sucks and it hurts, but it sure does teach the value of communication.
A surprise trip sounds like a NIGHTMARE to me. Either a.) You expect me to use time off I was already prepared to use for something else (stressful) or b.) You expect me to get time off on short notice (impossible). That, pared with the fact that trips I am prepared for, while fun, already have their own stress attached, just makes the whole situation sound awful.
Yeah, i dont think i could be in a long term relationship with someone who earnestly beleives in astrology. Be interested in it, read your horoscope because its fun, sure, ive done that before, but if you _truly_ think that the positions of stars and planets at ones birth influences their personality... I cant trust your judgement. I want some compatibility in our belief systems and thinking. Eg I wouldnt want to be with a religious woman either. Have some spiritual or esoteric beleifs or whatever, but if you are certain that your diety(ies) is(are) the absolute truth of the universe, compatability becomes an issue again. Edit: that isnt to say id be a dick about it though. Whether its astro or religion or anything like that, its all fine.
First one is not overreacting in general, his feelings are valid. A divorce is a bit much tho. I see couples post about their significant other sleeping all the time, so while I don’t think it’s strange, it obviously has this person unsettled, and that should be addressed
@christopherbrown5409 for some reason i feel like if there was a man taking over 9000 photos of his sleeping wife for years there would be more backlash from commenters. many have a bias within them that they probably don’t think about and i noticed i had that too a little bit before reversing the roles and i felt very grossed/creeped out. i tried imagining if my man would have done this to me. so i thought i should be equally against it if a lady did it to a man
@@helixxia9320divorce over taking photos? I think that is a overeation. He’s not overreacting for feeling creeped out but I think what he should do then is to have a conversation of tell her to stop, then if she doesn’t that’s grounds for a divorce.
You started posting daily around the time of my first major relationship break up. These vids are one of the highlights of my day and have helped distract me and make me feel happy for having my own interests again. thank you
6:22 I haven’t dated in years & was pondering it today & spent 15 minutes deciding that, no matter how small the dating pool for me is, I absolutely cannot with horoscopes
was mid cutting my hair into a 'weird' cut compared to my usual look by the end of the video, and to hear D'Angelo go "don't do it" scared thE SHIT OUTTA MEEEEE but thanks for saying it looks fantastic!!
17:54 my anxiety response is more like me wondering what the surprise is gonna be until it happens lol. its like a more positive version of being a worrywart. if i dont forget about it, it will keep popping up in my mind 😅
The bisexual post reminded me of the time that I felt comfortable enough to come out as non-binary and wanted to try my name, and my bf at the time that I had been with for a year told me (“jokingly”) that I waited until he was comfortable so I could trap him 💀 sometimes you’re just done with trying to hide who you are. And while I get that it’s a shock, most of the time comments about being uncomfortable with it screams insecurity and lack of communication
literally. like the fact that you’re coming out to your partner with such personal (and potentially endangering) information shows that you really trust them… and it fucking SUCKS to see that same partner turn around and accuse you of secretly cheating or tricking them or whatever. it takes a lot of trust to come out to somebody and that kind of reaction makes it CLEAR that your trust is not reciprocated
@@cyrus7107 exactly! It was me coming to terms with myself and feeling loved enough to start telling people and then I felt so awful. Now my current bf has never misgendered me and when he does HAVE to use my dead name he apologizes and talks about how weird it feels 😇
i feel like its slightly different in that this could be a case of just insecurity ("why did she wait so long to tell me? is she in love with another woman?" maybe he thinks shes looking to cheat because of the changing appearance) im not saying thats how it is but thats the best case. no defending your experience with your partner only explaining how i think the reddit situation could just be insecurity and not biphobia
The first story made me feel guilty for taking pictures of my partner sleeping sometimes, BUT mine knows I do it bc I send them to him on Snapchat 😭 He talks in his sleep, so it’s usually to catch a picture of his face after he yelled something that made no sense bc a person grinning from ear to ear while asleep looks goofy 🤣
Yea I had to be like "just for reference I do take pictures of you sleeping because the cat likes to sleep on your head like a fluffy hat and it's Hella cute"
Once in awhile I take pics of my husband sleeping in the morning cause I think he's beautiful, but he's aware of them and they are really rare. Over 9000 is really odd and grounds for a conversation, but not an immediate divorce
The book one strikes a nerve with me. My ex promised to read mine, even took on one of my characters as his own... AND READ LIKE A PAGE. (and tried to edit as he read) That was it. We were together for yearrsssss and I'd been writing longer than I'd known him.
I think the key here is TIME. You've given this woman 11 years and your family. Things like this are 100% valid to feel violated by and want to stop immediately, BUT all that time and love and shared life shouldn't be thrown away without give her the grace and space to ACCEPT that reality and YES I'd feel this way if they were a man too, snarky anti-fems. Something THIS outside the norm is probably going to take some effort and conditioning to reverse her feelings on. She clearly takes some kind of comfort or joy in this and what's absent is how YOU'D feel, since she never let you know. I believe though, that if that 11 years was really a good 11 years, it's worth the work and effort to try and fix. If she's not receptive at ALL, then sure you have a real problem but even that could be addressed by OPENLY and LOVINGLY asking for her family help (You were wronged, but if you want it fixed you have to again, have some grace for your family. In this case your wife) and if that has no luck, TELLING HER that this is bad enough to risk your trust in the marriage and see how THAT effects her view of her own actions. BUT this is what makes me 100% sure this is fake. There is just ZERO other info and anyone who this ACTUALLY happened too would either explain how INSANELY out of the blue this is and explain how other wise great their Wife is, because they are genuinely baffled and hurt. OR They would be listing off other red flags from before this, because this post would basically be them trying to console themselves about how the divorce they've BEEN thinking about is justified, cause Strangers also found this to be an insane last straw.
I took a handful of pics of my then-bf sleeping but I told him they existed and I can't imagine taking that many or being so secretive about it. The reason I took them is because he looked cute or in a position that was so strange I had to show him later. And we just laughed about it. Having so many and keeping it a secret is saddening. OCD or another mental health issue is definitely a possibility. Compulsions come in endless shapes and forms and obsessions frequently center around the safety or security of loved ones. As for the astrology one. I'm suspicious because there's this whole thing about people (men) who refuse to date anyone (women) who are into astrology so it seems either made-up or inauthentic/dishonest. Now taking astrology incredibly seriously to the point of it being your personal gospel isn't a good idea. I enjoy astrology because it's fun. Sometimes using horoscopes to guide my normal everyday decisions or know which direction to look. Discriminating between people of certain signs is dumb. Bisexual wife is probably having an identity crisis. It's a pretty normal part of realizing or finally admitting to oneself that they're queer or trans. But also she may just be trying the haircut. I really don't like it when men (and women, but mostly men) who suddenly feel their relationship is in danger when their partner realizes/reveals they're attracted to other genders. It's probably based on the myth that bisexual people are more likely to cheat on their partners to "fulfill" some type of innate desire to be with other genders which is bi/panphobia at its most basic. Also girls born after 1993 obviously "charge they phone" but I think we need to append to that meme, "charge they vape" lmfao
Aw, as someone who takes a bajillion photos of anything before I find one I like, I can see how it might be easy to accrue that many over time. Her only “weird” thing is not deleting the ones she didn’t like. Back in the day, I saw this tumblr meme that said something to the effect of “we take photos of what we love”, so I imagine she just finds you really precious. Unless you’re nude in the photos or really compromised, she’s probably just capturing moments she loves you and hates to delete them. Alternatively, maybe she’s getting off on watching you sleep? In which case it’s also a compliment in a way because she’s stoking her own fire with you
Every night i am so happy to be able to watch another one of your videos, partly because i love the videos and partly because i am happy that you seem to be doing well these days, which inspires me to also try to feel better by cutting our things that drag me down and investing more time in things that give me energy :)
20:21 All some of these scams only require you to respond. They just need to know the number works. So, probably best to not respond to unknown numbers.
Idk, I do actually know a guy who is tall, British, athletic, very emotionally available, and a nerd... and also a fucking doctor, from a well-off family. Some people are just insane like that. I bully him for it, because he sounds like a description out of a rom com, or the male lead in some YA book.
Shane the weird business owner reminds me of an internship that I applied for when I was fresh out of college and stuck in my small midwestern hometown. The owner wanted me to work full time for 6 months for free and I couldn’t do it, so I politely declined. He sent me an unhinged voicemail about how I was ungrateful, spoiled, and he would ruin my reputation so I would never get a job in my field in my hometown again. (Never mind that the “job” I applied for was literally the only opportunity I had in my field.) luckily my mom knew his dad through church, so I used the gossip train to get him yelled at and moved to California. 😅
The surprise one is weird to me maybe just because my friends talk to my partner. So if its her bday and he KNOWS they wanted to have a girls' weekend, why not just check with her friends? Because of course her friends are going to want to do something for her bday. I dont think anybody did anything wrong. It's just such an easy thing to avoid.
From what the post said they also don't get time for just them two , its either kids stuff or work so him assuming or really both sides assuming she would want to spend time with them for a birthday weekend isn't really crazy to me. Maybe there should have been some talk before but thats how surprises go so really its just unfortunate
I legitimately would not date someone who heavily believed in astrology, and I would tell them it’s a dealbreaker. I’ve spent my entire life becoming me; every single person alive has a different lived experience, dif genetics, culture, hair, skin, etc. that all inform how we begin and who we become. Anyone who wants to tell me who they think I am based on something as insignificant as the day I was born will not be a part of my life. I’ve had complete strangers look at me with DISGUST because of my birthday. I’ve been atheist since I was capable of forming intelligent thought and I cannot stress enough how insane it is that people think they know anyone because of a BIRTH. DAY.
People that astrology dictate their lives are weird because it’s only part of the picture and it’s why it’s not accurate they go in surface level and make it their personality maybe it’ll be more accurate (but not completely) if they used the houses but if you ask any person that does astrology about the houses and stuff they blank when it’s the actual meat of the philosophy 😂
I had someone on a dating app say she could tell I was a Pisces by how my eyes are shaped… I’m not a Pisces. That opening line gave me such an ick. Would my eyes have been shaped differently if I was born two days later as a different star sign? It was a complete deal breaker just for being a very stupid thing to believe.
Yeah same for me. Surface level, I don't think I could date anyone who believes in a faith-based theology. Deeper than that, I think there's something cruel about a person who says that things about you that you can't control (like the date/time/location of your birth) in some way predetermine who you are as a person. Obviously it isn't the same thing, but it gives off the same vibe to me as people who think people of certain genders/races carry certain traits "by nature". I'm never going to be comfortable with someone who doesn't look at people as individuals before anything else.
The 9k pictures one feels really gross to me because yeah, *straight* to divorce is a worst-case-scenario sort of conclusion but it’s not just ‘talk about it’ weird. She’s taking the pictures without asking- and because it’s the guy’s wife and not the other way around, a lot of people try to explain it away. Stop and think for a second how scary it would be to find out your spouse has taken *NINE THOUSAND* pictures of you without asking OR even telling you. You have no idea they’ve been snapping pictures this whole time. If one of my boyfriends did that I would genuinely call my dad to come sit with me while I talked to my partner. I would be *terrified.*
If you’re trying to plan a surprise and want to make sure she’s free… wouldn’t you communicate with the friends and say “hey this weekend don’t plan anything!” And hey SHE asked if she could go… he didn’t ask/confirm she was free that day…
My former partner was creating a medical education course based on his and his coresident’s research. Best believe I could recite his research paper, gave editing recommendations, sat through the finished modules, and even partook in the little quiz questions they’d throw in. That’s just how partnerships work, genuine interest in what your partner’s doing. The wife said it means a lot to her if he read her book, responding with “I don’t like reading” isn’t good enough.
Man, I really feel the horoscope thing. I’ve had a billion more awful experiences with people who truly believed in horoscopes than good ones. The assumptions they make about you as a whole-ass human being because they found out your birthdate are insane, and in my case legitimately harmful.
Yeah, like say the story's real, the girl COULD have been doing it without thinking deeply about whether or not it's true, but even that carries the implication that she is very capable of following beliefs without thinking deeply about whether or not they're true
Yeah the desire some people have to categorise others and explain away all of their actions/behaviours as predestined/attributed to/traits of whatever category they're incidentally in is.... dismissive of individuals, I think
there are so many potential issues with surprise parties/trips/whatever. the loss of control, being put on the spot, everybody watching for your reactions... you need to be a very specific type of person to take all of that in stride
I personally dislike astrology because it seems like an easy way to scam people, when they write incredibly general things in the weekly prediction thing and such. I also hate it bc im an aries so im supposed to be a strong leader and determined and i wish i was but i'm shy, indicisive and antisocial instead.
Honestly, i appreciate how D'Angelo those these react to reddit post. Because he doesnt read them word per word then give an opinion. He summarizes it for us and then state his thoughts. He also includes alot of posts into one video. Making it more entertaining. Like small thing but makes him of the best content creator out there.
i love listening to d'angelo wallace speak because i feel like he explains a lot of my autisitc traits (even if he isnt autistic) such as that needing things simple, and he explains it in a way i could genuinely never. ehh, always appreciate you man O.M.W to binge every video over and over again
Yea for that first one, as someone who has thought about taking pictures of my partner while sleeping bc I think they're adorable, I have stopped myself bc I think "how would I feel if they did this to me??" Creeped out. I'd be creeped out. Especially if it was anything more than maybe 2 pictures... 😬
"I just found 9,631 photos of me asleep on her phone."
- My cat
Maybe the husband IS a cat. Or the wife THINKS he’s a cat 😅
I sincerely hope she isn't married to a cat
I would possibly be guilty of this as well
caught
I made an algorithm to run through my photos and put all the pet pics in one album… 11k and counting in only five years. I have ocd and find it hard to delete pictures, so safe to say I think I understand the wife on that front lol 😔🙏
I wrote a 23 page research article on the neuroanatomical signatures of hyperphantasia in youth, including sections on materials, measurements, results, limitations, and recommendations. And my non-researcher husband read every damn word of it lol
my bf studies in a field I understand nothing about and I still read everything important he writes... its just caring about you partner's time and passions
I was never lucky enough to find a partner who took interest in my work, but I sure am lucky enough to have a dad obsessed with it, showing me what it's like for someone to value your professional side. Thanks, dad!
To all the girl dads out there: make sure your kid knows what love and appreciation look like, so they don't end up on reddit threads like these✌
I would be more inclined to read a research paper than a romance novel tbh, it's more interesting !
If you don’t mind to share the title and where to find it (TH-cam tends to delete comments with links), I’d appreciate it very much! As someone who developed a weirdly vivid and immersive imagination as a kid (probably as a result of my innate ADHD and nurtured trauma and dissociation), the term hyperphantasia surely perked my ears up
That's absolutely wonderful! I love neuroscience.
Over 9,000 photos is equal to at least 2 photos of him sleeping a night. Every. Day. For. 11. Years.
😳
well there is no way that would be real
she coouuuuuuld be a spam picture taker. maybe she takes multiple photos and multiple angles… and then painstakingly sorts them all into a dedicated album…
i’m trying my best here
That's what makes me think it's just a quick photo before she falls asleep and then when she wakes up, or maybe there are duplicates from one night he looked cute and she took like 3-5. Not to overly justify that, it's pretty strange to have so many, but that's just the only thing I can think of. I take the occasional photo of my partner in the morning every few weeks, or if they're napping, especially if our pets are with them.
@@emiilyshe I feel... that this is maybe just her 1 quirk, if the spouse has no other issues with the wife. They should just stay together. Right?
I came out as bi to my husband after 21 years of marriage and he replied … “Um. I knew? … Did … you not know?”
How did he find out?
I love this
@@yolenda_loves_to_singUnless you're actively hiding it it's going to come up that you find people of the same gender attractive.
💀 DID YOU NOT KNOW SENT ME
Haha this is great. When I came out to my husband he then went and found a bunch of articles that talk about how awesome it is to be married to someone who's bisexual 😄
Wait wait wait what’s Dave’s take??? WHAT’S DAVE’S TAKE
This is very important.
These are the answer we need
I think we should respect Dave's privacy at this time. He may have past trauma and decided not to comment.
That's D'Angelo's take on the situation. Dave, however, cannot have a take on the situation since he used to immediately resort to violence on the drama that took place on real Greek forums 500 years ago.
Alas, we shall never know what take Dave had on today’s video. Much like fans of Timothée Chalamet, we need to accept that we have no control over our idol and whether or not Dave chooses to bless us with a take in any given video is up to him. 😝
The book one is gross that he won't read it but still makes suggestions. It means he doesn't care about her inner world but does want to control it.
Speak 👏 On 👏 It 👏
top comment worthy
just reading it made me eugh
preach!
this was worded perfectly
Remember guys, marriage won’t fix your relationship it’ll only make it harder to leave
Soo only get married if you truly want to live your life with that person 😊
also kids. or pets. don’t do either of those things to “fix” your relationship problems either.
oh! and I completely forgot-bringing other people into the picture (making your relationship open or poly) to “fix” things just makes them harder too! If you’re having problems communicating or working with 1 person, adding others into the mix WILL NOT MAKE THAT EASIER.
@@eleventhclara THIS
@@eleventhclara Right??? Don't bring someone into your horror house in the hopes that they'll fix it. So many people looking for poly relationships end up being the newly assigned therapist who isn't being paid and has to deal with alllllllll the emotional fall out.
yes, with that person, as they are.
Not for who you think they could be, or who you want them to be, or who they are under the right circumstances....
Dude doesn't have to care about his wife's book, or read it. But if he ain't gonna read it he needs to QUIT MAKING SUGGESTIONS holy shit bro
Yes! That would be so annoying!
Right? Literally stop, I’ve never gotten a good idea from someone saying “you know what you should write???”
My wife wants me to read her book and I refuse. I just don't think I'd like it. But when I hear about it I don't say shit. Not my genre, not my book, and Iove her. Of course I'd never say anything bad about it. Especially without even reading it!
@@darkkit1994but you don't like your wife enough to think that you might like things about the book that she wrote? That's what's so confusing to me. Do you not believe that the author influences the work? Are you *actually* scared that you'll think it's badly made and you don't want to have to lie about her skill? Just "I'm not interested in the genre" is such a bs excuse to not *read one book that your partner created*.
@@keladry12you can like someone and not be the same person and have different likes and interests, unless you want to date your mirror image which sounds boring
After my husband passed away, I discovered he had a file within a file labeled, "Other Pics." I was screen-sharing at the time with a local organization's president who he had been volunteering with. The main file was their documents and photos. I was helping them get files he was working on when he passed.
I opened the file and found mildly zoomed in butt pics.
There are SO many butts.
He was not a 'butt guy'. I was shocked, confused, and suddenly concerned. The person watching my screen gasped. I immediately stopped sharing and excused myself.
The deep dive into the folder made me nervous. I'd heard horror stories from other widows, but it had been months, and nothing sketchy had popped up. We were in love, and he was a stand-up guy.
I could tell they were candid shots. The locations and outfits were different. It took me a few minutes to realize they were ALL of me. I've never taken pics of my own butt from a distance, but apparently, he had.
I'm not sure he ever intended me to see them. While it was weird, it was mostly funny and a bit sweet.
I didn't go through any of the rest of his files. We were always careful with each other's privacy. I'm glad I found the pics. It was like he was winking at me from the great beyond.
The org's president and I had a good laugh about it later. I deleted the file and live on knowing that while he may not have been a 'butt guy', he sure liked mine.
"winking at me from the great beyond" made me crack up! But it is so oddly sweet, he must have lovedyou very much. Im sorry foryour loss
@@botanicalitus4194"crack up" on a comment about butt pics made me snort laugh but then I am really immature
he may not have been a butt-guy but he was your-butt guy!
This was lowkey so cute. It made me giggle. He loved you. ❤️
but why were you screen sharing at the same time tho 😭
Using "kinda" and "fck off" is CRAZY while coming at someone for being supposedly unprofessional. Dog what
Dude doesn't even know what professionalism is if he thinks "Hi" and nothing else is a good way to start a business conversation 😂
It aggravates me so much when someone acts unprofessional, but then when you react understandably confused or annoyed, they call *you* unprofessional.
It seems for a lot of these egomaniacs "professionalism" just means sucking up to them
"shane" is so blatantly unprofessional in that conversation, meanwhile OP was actually very kind, courteous and professional given the circumstances. I want to rip my hair out
Dog
Idk maybe she applied to a scammy job listing or something. Her replies were soo polite but he still managed to get annoyed about it, made it seem like he had a too good to be true opportunity she was missing out on?! But then again a scammer would probably be more keen to respond lol
I love having D'Angelo curate this subreddit for me, I stg half the time the posts are like, "am I overreacting to my husband stabbing me 28 times a few minutes ago?"
OH MY GOSH, SAME. It gets very draining to see people questioning their sanity and safety for an individual. I wish I got more quirky ones x.x
"TWENTY. EIGHT. STAB WOUNDS" (Reminded me of Detroit become human 😭)
@@oDM0o DIDN'T WANNA LEAVE HIM A CHANCE, HUH? 😂
@oDM0o hey I was actually in Detroit twice in the past 5-6 years for concerts and it was actually quite nice and not scary. The only issue I had was stumbling upon human feces near a statue while playing pokemon go 😂 that was quite a shock
@@leahvogelsimpson Have you played DBH?
the skinny dipping one is crazy, the wife was literally like why do you have to be naked and they both brushed it off. definitely something happening between them... poor lady
The writer is absolutely not over reacting and had nothing to apologize for. This was not a happy ending.
Hard agree. It made me angry to hear that she apologized…
that's what i thought!
like people who are just so so opposed to reading as if it burns are so silly, (and don't have any condition that makes it unpleasant) so much that when your Wife PLEADS for you to read her book you just shut her down? it gave off the feeling that he didn't believe in her and thought it was gonna be bad, so he didn't even attempt to humor her. also with all the advice and stuff.
yall talk about boundaries as if reading YOUR WIFES BOOK BC SHE ASKED YOU TO and she values your input was the biggest sacrifice 😭
it's possibly one of the most harmless things you could do!! why are we validating him when his attitude sucks?
fr that mad me so mad
@@mim_mimm legit. I’m writing a book right now and i have friends who don’t even like reading that much and are willing to read it just because i wrote it! Lol. And i wouldn’t even expect them to. Like books are not that big of a time commitment. Just take 30 mins out of your day and read for 30 mins. No one is saying he has to read the entire book in one day
@@Spracker333 I don't know. I have friends that want to read but never actually manage to finish a book. I love reading, but I only read about 3 books a month and find it really really hard to to that. And if you recommend me a series or movie, it will likely take me years to watch that. That you personally find it easy to do something doesn't mean that it's easy for everyone.
I think the husband that wont read the book is in the wrong. It's not about enjoying the book its about supporting your partner. My partner reads all my school papers and he doesnt care about the subject but he knows its important to me so he reads them. Obviously a book is bigger than a few essays but still spend a few hours at least reading part of it just to support your spouse.
thats not usual at all for someone to read all your school papers tho, I'd never do that 😂 idc
I read my husband's research papers, including his mind-numbing work term reports, and work he was actually proud of, because it was important to him. I think you should show up for your partner the way they want to be shown up for, not the way that feels natural to you. 🤷♀️ Reading an entire manuscript is a big commitment, but he could have compromised and offered to read a chapter or an excerpt, and I am sure it would have meant the world to her.
@@nad_bell_ that's what I'm saying! Like I can't imagine my partner writing a whole book they are proud of and me refusing to read any of it?? I get maybe not the whole thing but man's can't even skim the first chapter? I would be devastated!
I understand supporting your partner.
However, as someone who has read stuff people who are important to me have written in a genre I have no connection to, you can deeply hurt feelings by mistake. Does the person want notes? If not you might be fine to have just read it and it's not your genre. But reading someone's art that is not a genre that you are not connected to can be a minefield. I'm always proud of someone for writing a book. However, because writing a book is very personal and tough "I'm really proud of you for writing a book" can feel dismissive to people (or at least that's what I've had people tell me)
I always want to be supportive of people I love. However, I sometimes don't know the right way to do so that doesn't hurt feelings if they are doing something I don't have a connection to.
That being said, the guy in the story is not being supportive IMHO
This. I quite literally have dyslexia, I struggle immensely to read more than a few sentences but when my partner has asked me to read his law assignments I’ve done my best to read through it. They want my opinion and to show off their work, and I love being able to do that. For the long papers I’ve started putting them on txt to speech so I can actually absorb what’s happening. Being supportive should not be a chore
Seriously why is it on r/aita alone a quarter of the stories are women questioning if they're being a holes for not wanting to put up with their lazy manchild husbands/bfs?
I mean...we know why. But the misogyny still leaves me awestruck in horror.
Because there are plenty of women (and men, and NBs) who weren't told it's okay to have boundaries
i guess it is just that common of an issue
unless the stories are fakes. but from my own experiences 3 out of 4 boyfriends have been pretty much a ‘’man-child’’ in the relationship dynamic, so i don’t think it is too unlikely that many other women have dealt with it too
and all the redditor comments will be like "yes you are"
I think aita is a modern version of gossip circles from women in history. The circles they outlawed and deemed witch craft. Women's social network is their biggest safety measure. When a woman in a bad relationship has been isolated, or if her social circle is equally unhealthy, reddit can be their first reference of healthy and normal.
Most people who're being abused have some level of instinct that their treatment is wrong. One stranger online can feed that instinct enough to leave.
The getaway-trip husband feeling like that is so valid… but in adulthood it is SO HARD to even just grab a cup of coffee with your besties unless you’re blessed with the same zip code.
Also, if someone surprised me with a wholeass trip, I’d be so conflicted 😅 But then again, I got the autism that hates abrupt plan changes.
My autistic self had the same thought like. I'd much prefer to go on a planned trip than a surprise one, even if I'd normally prefer to go with the other person. I need to be prepared and I hate hate HATE abrupt changes in schedule. I don't plan much because if I did it would drive me bonkers every single time someone I love with good intentions would make plans not realizing they've accidentally added 15 layers of stress. Hoping OP and them did go on a nice trip later that everyone had time to put together.
yes :( like i'm sorry but a planned trip with multiple friends?? it might be rude to my husband but i think it would be ruder for me to cancel on All my friends (like consider the schedule changes abd sacrifices they all had to make, etc.) because my husband wanted to surprise me without asking if i was free
he's not overreacting but in married life you tend to lose connection with friends bc you often don't make time for them while prioritizing your partner, and putting it off when you do have the plans... idk
@@softestshade7813 I hope so too! Obvi can't speak for them, but my attempt at a solution would be a sort of compromise. I'd try to follow through with friends and make some sort of special effort to spend time with husband later.
Then again, it's just hard for me to imagine being with a partner who would be unaware of my immense discomfort with something like "surprise! we're going to Cancun weekend!" 😅
@@mim_mimm Agree with you 100%!
It's like Trolley Problem: Vacation Edition. 😅 Postponing a getaway with my 1 highly-trusted life partner (whom I see every day, and presumably knows how little time I get to relax with friends) makes more sense than canceling on a complex multi-person trip that my friends went through the trouble to plan for my birthday.
@@Ghost-lt4sf Fr!! My boyfriend is also autistic so we only to get roped into social outings together from other people! The most “surprise” I ever get out of him is that he brought home snacks for us 😭 Maybe this is just a sign to be grateful for what I’ve got lol
The photos aren’t necessarily creepy, I take photos or videos of my husband too when he sleeps but I almost always show them because I think it’s cute. But her not showing him and the amount of photos is really weird. I have OCD and that OCD comment could be possible, but if she doesn’t have OCD it seems really weird.
Exactly this. Or if I'm video calling with my partner and the screen freezes with him making a funny expression, I'll screenshot it and then immediately send it to him so he can share in the laugh. He does the same to me. I feel the weird part is the sheer volume of photos, and that she wasn't showing them to him.
Yea for real looking at the love of your life sleeping thinking theyre so pretty is NORMAL ??? Thats a sign of love you're married its not creepy to take pics of them at all.
@gokcenakdag8189 it's creepy when men do it
@@93runninggiraffes Yes the amount and her not telling him made it weird, but I literally have thousands of photos of my husband and some of them are like also do screenshots of FaceTime conversations. But he knows because I send them and tell him how cute or funny the photo is.
@@christopherbrown5409 no it isnt. He is my husband, if he thinks i look cute sleeping that's adorable. Although i look terrible in the pictures. He cant show them to anyone obv.
her perfect guy is a blonde hair blue eyed British man??? that sounds like my nightmare
Blonde, blue-eyed British men catching strays for no reason 😂
But really though...I thought the same thing lol.
As a Brit I agree
blonde british men become bald british men the second they turn 25
I think physical appearance is separate from pretty much divorced from actual values, like when i see people act in ways that are kind it kinda shapes my "type", it's important to know a person to lol
I think the big thing is that she never told him about these photos. I have taken photos of certain family members (like my dad) while they were sleeping because they were doing something cute, like cuddling with one of our pets or something. But once they wake up, I show them the photo and ask if they want me to delete it or something. I also don't share the photo without their permission.
It's also a subtle way of gauging their comfort levels and seeing if they are generally uncomfortable with this kind of thing. The fact that she never made him aware of these photos is concerning to me.
My son is the most beautiful sleeper ever so I do have a bunch of pics of him sleeping but he is very aware that I have them and at 20 I don’t have more than 100 of them.
I think this is a valid point, but I also think it’s the volume. I might take a picture of someone while they’re sleeping because they’re doing something cute, like you said, and then forget about it and never bring it up. She took these THOUSANDS of pictures, put them in an album, AND kept it a secret. Even if she took a few secret or forgotten photos, I’d be like, okay, interesting… but thousands is intense.
@@U5678-hl7oi A thousands is intense yeah. Though it has been 11 years, but still. I love taking pics of my girlfriend (shes always cute) and even I don’t have that many 😭 and she deletes the ones she doesn’t like and I’m not allowed to post anything without permission. There are ways to make your partner feel comfortable about snapping photos, and hiding them isn’t it
Yeah I have a few pictures of family members sleeping, usually because of the pose, place, or if they're sleeping with a pet. But I usually show them.
The fact that she got angry when asked about it was a red flag imo
Maybe the hunky british guy knew they had incompatible stars signs and at that point he just knew he could not hold up the charade no longer, now he knows she was into them. So had to slip his Hugo boss shirt over his rippling abs and run off into a rain storm, with one glance back before never being seen again.
He'll probably run up to her to apologize with flowers next time she's about to board a plane or something
have you written netflix movies before because
Maybe dude was a Pisces man and he knew that's all she would need to know to find out what a piece of work he is 😂
Why do Reddit story’s always have the most insane titles 😭 ’am In the wrong if somone tried to kidnap me and steal my identity?’ 😭
frrr aita for being mugged on vacation?
Some people are legitimately so easy to manipulate and gaslight or they will just believe anything someone tells them or that they read online 😭😭 When it's a result of abuse or a really bad upbringing or being 22 years old (💀) I can forgive the naivety because they just don't KNOW, but then there are others who just straight up don't BOTHER to think for themselves and don't even bother to consider what their values and opinions are and it's both maddening and sad
@@camilareyes2781 bro Aita for telling my bully to please go away? 🥹
@@saltiestsiren true it’s genuinely concerning
@@saltiestsiren There's that, but in Reddit specifically I think a lot of people just make up these scenarios to farm karma
I got so mad when the book lady said she knew she overreacted and had apologized to her husband. GIRL YOU DID NOTHING WRONG DON'T LISTEN TO THE NECKBEARDS
SAMEEE
i'm kinda icked by the second. Romantasy is not a hard to read genre, the fact that husbad didn't even bother to read even the first few chapters is very sad. As a hobby-writer i would be so upset. I think it's heartbreaking how little somebody's life partner cares about something that makes their partner happy.
i think the romance genres are some of the hardest to read. it can get cringey so easily. i rarely read them, and get tired of them very easily, it's just taste. maybe the dude just don't like reading because he can't picture things in his head, or has a hard time with literacy, or hates narrative driven stories. idk. it's still icky that he wouldn't at least try and then honestly say it's not for him.
Given how... 'TMI about what the author's into' some romance writing can be, I can kind of sympathize with the husband not wanting to read it. Imagine reading a sex scene between the maiden and the werewolf, and you _recognize_ it.
True, he could’ve sucked it up, read it and made her so happy. I’d be super interested to read something if I knew who wrote it… unless it was a family member who wrote something romancsy lol
@Eloraurora I feel like having your partner write out their fantasies like that is literally like receiving a manual on how to take sex to the next level for them. That's the opposite of a problem imo
@@cousinmajin I guess I was thinking in terms of publishing. If the book stays within the relationship, or is published anonymously, it feels less weird; no chance of some acquaintance going, "Just finished your wife's book." 😏
"If HBO contacted me by texting me 'lol sup?' like you did, I would similarly assume it was a creepy guy trying to pick me up and brush them off. But HBO doesn't do that, Shane. Only you reach out to people in such an unprofessional way that you sound like a creep. Seek professional help, and I don't mean HR."
Also can we start using "Shane" as an insult like we used to use Karen? I feel like I know a lot of slimy Shanes.
@@gnocchidokeysort of sounds like shame it makes sense
@@gnocchidokey shane Dawson. He's ruined it. Shane Stardew makes up for it though
@@mellow_mallow shane stardew is stereotypical shane to me
@@gnocchidokey using someone's name as an insult sounds like terrible idea
18:03
if someone "surprised" me with a trip the day of, i would probably throw up lol. i need 24hr notice for anything that requires me to leave my house
The man who said he had no serious issues but he wants to leave his wife over the series of pictures she took while he was sleeping. I don't believe they haven't had any other serious issues because yeah it's creepy very very creepy but also three children 11 years, there's other reasons why you want to leave this woman. I cannot think it's just because of the creepy photos. There must be other creepy behavior. Or misaligned beliefs or some s***
Usually it's a gut feeling but they can't consciously identify other behavioral examples (yet).
I mean- he could have also been forgotten what having serious issues in a relationship is like, which is why he would overreact and jump to divorce.. when you've had no serious issues for 11 years, you probably assume you never will, so having something like this come up could be really concerning/alarming, and he might have just jumped to the worst case scenario
Tbf it's not just a few. Thousands of photos when you are your most vulnerable is terrifying. Why are they taken? Where are they going? WHY
Tbf it's not just a few. Thousands of photos when you are your most vulnerable is terrifying. Why are they taken? Where are they going? WHY
I don't know man he mentioned being afraid of sleeping next to her, when something messes with your feeling of safety when sleeping things can go from 0 to 100 super fast.
Reporting for class Professor Wallace 🫡
You forgot the comma in your sentence and you made it a run on.
In the subject of Anomalous Normalcy dropping the Oxford comma is worthy of an A. An A for authentic stream of consciousness in communication.
can someone write my name down on the attendance list. I can't make class today 😔.
@@Floofie_boi cmon now, this ain’t a grammar class
..it’s anomalous normalcy obvi 😌
@@comicaltuber gotchu, i’ll take notes for you too
I'd recommend contacting the company about Shane so they can put that idiot in his place
Seriously. I assumed he was just a creep until he identified himself! And actually, even then...
I believe it said he was the owner of the company.
@@nad_bell_yeah it was giving small business vibes to me
Definitely super crazy. It was giving vibes like he just took their information from their resume and was reaching out to them on his own accord. He said he was told to reach out but not until pretty deep into the convo which is so sketch!
15:07 they are literally cheating right in front of her.
YES!!!!!!!!!
Yep! I don’t understand why she didn’t kick the friend out and the husband, for good measure. I guarantee they are already sleeping together or having an emotional affair at the very least.
I agree. Op needs to be getting a video recording as evidence for her divorce, just in case. This is not cool at all.
Right? That's clearly against the agreements of their relationship from the way she's describing things, and both the best friend and husband know damn well it's not the same as when they went skinny dipping in a big group together. I would be so hurt if my partner chose to do something so blatantly in front of me of ANY kind that was something they knew would hurt me so badly, and we had both agreed is a thing just for us, like hanging out naked alone..
I could give them the benefit of the doubt somewhat if they hadn't gone out of their way to avoid checking in with OP until after she blew up in frustration, too, instead waiting until she had to have such a large reaction to get their attention. Why couldn't they have cared when she asked them why they kept wanting the stakes to be nudity? Or when she left from a mixture of not feeling well and being uncomfortable? Or when she came back to check on them?
YIKES, the disrespect from them both towards OP is astounding.
Only vaguely related to the random text story-when I was in high school I got a random text from an unknown number and I was like “hey sorry you have the wrong number!” and then THEY responded saying “what the hell are you talking about??” and then for the next few class periods we were arguing back and forth between breaks on who had gotten whose number and who had texted first, until I brought it up with a classmate in my creative writing class who I had done mock trial with the year before.
As it turns out, for some reason I received a text that she had sent me THE YEAR BEFORE as if she had just sent it-and obviously, since we didn’t text about anything but the case which was now over, she had since deleted the conversation long before. So from my phone, it looked like she had sent me a text out of nowhere. From her phone, it looked like I had sent her a text out of nowhere.
I still have no idea how that happened or why, but it was truly an insane couple of hours.
there was a period of like a few days in the mid 2000s where people who were customers of a certain cellular provider were receiving texts from over a year prior. it was a huge number of people, you can look it up online. people were receiving texts from loved ones numbers who had since passed, etc. i think i was in high school at the time as well so it was likely between 2006-2010, probably.
@@DKF_oli damn, that’s weird! This happened in 2019 lol
@@yakketyyak6414 i love being wrong! hahaha
23:41 Shane is 100% a scammer haha, he didn’t offer any details linking him to any company, OP was the one who divulged that they applied for the internship
The internship one is so dumb bc no professional company will text, let alone text in that manner. I’ve never had a job reach out via text, only email & phone call where they state who they are & the company they represent. Valid to assume it’s a scam if you get a text from a random number saying “hi” w/ no additional context
Agreed
Yeah, so, when soneone you love pours an extraordinary amount of work into something, even if it's not your 'thing', your a$$ better show up & appreciate it. You watch the sport game even if you don't sport. You take time to appreciate their art even if you don't art. And you read the book, paper. Novella, short story, even if you don't read.
If you truly love someone you should be there to celebrate their wins. You don't need to love their thing, you just need to love them.
And this is one of the many many reasons my 2nd marriage ended. So, now I'm twice divorced, which means I'm extra fancy, lol
Yeah... a lot of people don't care enough to do that. It's really sad.
Seriously it's giving jealousy
I kinda agree. Even if it takes 10-15 hours to read, this is one of her greatest achievements of the past few years. It's a small sacrifice relative to how much this probably means to her.
Ehhh I half disagree. There are plenty of other ways to show support encouragement and appreciation for someone outside of directly engaging in that thing. I generally avoiding reading, even when it’s my loves ones writing, because I have dyslexia (and a vision issue on top of that tbh) which makes reading a miserable and frustrating experience.
right! like i dont care for sports but if my partner is playing for a sport team hes passionate about, i’ll show up and support him because i know it means a lot to him and im genuinely interested in his interests
10:57 I am a writer and tbh I would probably break up with someone if they did not put in the effort to read something I labored so long over, that was so important to me. ESPECIALLY if they kept trying to making edit suggestions without having read it!!!
I just talk about random stuff I figured out for my book and my partner gets excited for it. It’s not about the book, it’s about the effort
Yeah, I feel like it's a little bit one or the other. I know a lot of people who struggle to sit down and read whole books, especially if it's not a genre they're into, so I could see being with someone who might not read the whole book right away (though I'd appreciate them making an effort for it), but...
If you're not gonna read the context, how could you even make editing or story suggestions? You can't properly tell what works and what doesn't without reading it, so if it's beyond the brainstorming stage and there is a text, then either read the text or be increeedibly respectful about any suggestions...
I'm a software engineer and I wouldn't dream of expecting my wife to give a shit about the software I write. Just because your job results in an output that many consume as a hobby, that doesn't entitle you to universal engagement.
Sure, the edit suggestions aspect is weird, but doesn't even make sense if he's refusing to read it. Not just the "why" but the "how".
@artyb27 This is such an engineer response lol. Asking your partner to read code is nothing like asking them to read a book
Why can’t a loving partner support your work and efforts without reading your work? I personally cringe when reading romance novels, I’m not going to like it no matter how great the writing is. My husband writes short stories as a hobby. I’ve read some of his works but not all of them. I show my support by bringing him tea and snacks while he’s writing.
As someone with ocd I do get it ngl. I have to take a photo of my cat everyday or something will happen. Obviously 9,000 photos is crazy but I also kinda understand
Yeah but you get the difference between a cat and a human being right? If she was doing this without his consent, and actively trying to hide it from him, then that is incredibly problematic. OCD might be a reason but it is certainly not an excuse to do it.
Not at all minimizing your OCD and having intrusive thoughts about what would happen if you didn’t, but taking a picture of your cat everyday is such a mood. How can you have cats and be like “no photos for me?” 😂❤
Keep in mind this is over a decade
I don't think there's anything inherently sinister about the pictures. Unless she's posting them somewhere
@@Marc-nw9mpWhat’s the difference? They’re both family members and if the OCD says you have to take a picture of them or they’ll die, that’s the same compulsion. The difference is that cats wouldn’t get creeped out by you having photos of them, but if it really is an OCD thing it makes sense that she might be embarrassed or even afraid to tell him about the photos, like if she feels like something will happen to him if he knows about the photos or if she’s just embarrassed by the OCD and isn’t ready to talk about it especially in a context where she’d be admitting to violating someone’s privacy in a way.
i too am a bisexual born after 1993 who charges my phone and eats hot chip
Do you lie though?
but do you lie
Omg same 💅
@@GumSkyloard sometimes 🙊
@@spirograffe Duly noted, hehehehe.
8:43 So as a writer with a “not really a reader partner” I’ve found that sharing bits a pieces/infodumping is a fun compromise. I talk about my books for a bit and then he tells me about horror movies and we have a good time
I did a good surprise once: bc the trip wasn't the surprise. The location was. I cleared the wkend w/ them then said we were going away & the weather where we were going. But I didn't tell them the location. That part was a surprise. It went over really well!
I dunno if it was cynical but that was definitely sweet of you
This is the way
I have a hard time with travel and surprises but I think I would like this style of surprise!! That sounds neat :)
Thats so nice of you! My boyfriend surprised me like that and also told me we've already been there. I have PTSD and am very fast triggered so he did everything he could to make the surprise nice for me. It was such a nice time and I like to remember it.
Skinny dipping one sounds like shit my ex-husband would've said.
If there ever was a red flag in that relationship, that “bet” would certainly be it.
good thing he’s an ex!! i hope you’re doing amazing now 👠
Did we have the same ex? 😅 Cause if not they definitely shared the same brain cell.
Sounds like something my ex bf would say.
As an adult, surprises will only really work if it’s small. A surprise gift, maybe a surprise movie night (when both parties were just gonna do nothing), but a surprise trip??? That’s way too much in a schedule to not need time to accommodate for. Least the guy was trying to do good instead of what usually happens with girls trip posts?
I surprised a friend with a promise to buy tickets to a museum once we work out a date. That's about as "surprise trip" as it gets for us grown ups.
Maybe if the trip is a life dream with a limited timeframe, like the Beyonce Renaissance tour, and you give them the tickets months in advance so they can plan for it.
Am I overreacting by liking this video?
yes
YTA & divorce him
You should get a therapist ASAP (and get her to subscribe too lmao)
if you can’t even see the problem with your own actions… get help that is not normal
I would say you are underreacting because you're supposed to rate and enrole. Alternatively, you can get Dave's take on this👍🏾
Shane sounds like a total scammer, I bet there was never an internship to begin with.
Quite possibly. Scammer, or at minimum a slightly toxic workplace. That would be my assumption. Nice big red flag right at the start... Which is actually rather helpful of him lol. Accidental-GG shane let OP know to avoid that company.
Seeing my husband and my best friend being naked and splashing each other water in a pool = Getting a divorce right away, no questions asked!!!
This one is probably the only actually SERIOUS case among all the posts mentioned here in this video.
I simply just would NOT accept this disrespectful behavior! No mater how long I have been married to my husband or known this friend.
So no, it's not overreacting at all! The fact that the wife here has to ask if she is overreacting, tells me that she has already probably been emotionally neglected and abused by her husband for many years.
She needs to leave him, ASAP!!! Otherwise worse things will definitely happen. The next thing you will see very soon would be he and your friend being naked playing with each other in bed...
Ten bucks that the Shane guy worked for an MLM and disguised recruitment as an internship
15:40 Dude, the guy said she planned the girl's trip first, and he didn't tell her about his plans until after she asked him if he was ok with her leaving. This is totally on him.
Incorrect, she was telling him about the girls trip and he said he had already planned a trip
Your rant about surprises was so real.
I hate surprises and had to tell everyone I know not to give me any surprise gifts because they’re usually underwhelming and not knowing what I will get gives me anxiety.
Smosh reddit stories and D’angelo reddit stories on the same day? We’re eating good tonight.
YOU GET ITTT
REALLL
YES I LOVE THIS FOR US
yes!
Yooooooooo fr
2:19 Best case scenario: the photos are or are the equivalent of Live Photos on an iPhone and his wife has been concerned her husband may have sleep apnea
😅😅😅😅 if only lol. She must be testing the sleep apnea over 11 years. For secret science 😅
As someone with ASD the amount of information paradox is so infuriating!!! I naturally just give too much detail bc my brain sees it as relevant, and people think that's dishonest, but then if you dont tell them enough, then its also perceived that way? 😂 There's just no winning. someone will think you're lying no matter what!
Reading a book YOUR PARTNER wrote is not that huge of a commitment, honestly. Showing interest in what your partner is doing is literally the bare minimum, and writing your first book is *monumental* . It takes so much work and dedication, and when you finish it, it's not only one of the best feelings in the world, it's also a giant accomplishment. I'd be so hurt if my partner refused to read it.
I just finished my first book and all my friends and family- some of them aren't readers at all, some of them don't like the genre I wrote- excitedly offered me to proof read it and told me how excited they were to read it. The thing is, I don't expect this from my friends, but I would absolutely expect this from family and a partner.
He doesn't have to read every single book she writes. But the first one? Come on. Even if you aren't a reader, can't you just suck it up this one time for her? If you can't even commit to reading ONE book for your partner, that's sad, and if I was the one refusing to read my husband's first book that he's so excited about because I can't be bothered to, I'd be REALLY embarrassed to see that even casual friends who aren't big readers themselves are willing to.
Think of a different scenario: a man gets to play soccer in the world cup for the first time, but his wife hates sports and doesn't watch a single one of his games.
The dude whose wife chose girls' trip got the hard end of birthday surprises. Her friends knew she needed time with friends, while he failed to ask if his surprise was something she wanted. It sucks and it hurts, but it sure does teach the value of communication.
A surprise trip sounds like a NIGHTMARE to me. Either a.) You expect me to use time off I was already prepared to use for something else (stressful) or b.) You expect me to get time off on short notice (impossible). That, pared with the fact that trips I am prepared for, while fun, already have their own stress attached, just makes the whole situation sound awful.
6:44 I think it’s authentic. Astrology girls can be a little extra, so that level of story telling feels on brand for that kind of person.
I agree. This would make me end a relationship, too.
Yeah, i dont think i could be in a long term relationship with someone who earnestly beleives in astrology. Be interested in it, read your horoscope because its fun, sure, ive done that before, but if you _truly_ think that the positions of stars and planets at ones birth influences their personality... I cant trust your judgement. I want some compatibility in our belief systems and thinking. Eg I wouldnt want to be with a religious woman either. Have some spiritual or esoteric beleifs or whatever, but if you are certain that your diety(ies) is(are) the absolute truth of the universe, compatability becomes an issue again.
Edit: that isnt to say id be a dick about it though. Whether its astro or religion or anything like that, its all fine.
I hope bf means boyfriend that adds a layer to the story lmao
Seeing you every day is a blessing D’Angelo.
"Don't set yourself up to expect things that haven't been confirmed." 💯
First one is not overreacting in general, his feelings are valid. A divorce is a bit much tho. I see couples post about their significant other sleeping all the time, so while I don’t think it’s strange, it obviously has this person unsettled, and that should be addressed
Why isn't it valid for.a man to divorce a woman for creeping him out and giving him the ick?
@@christopherbrown5409 nobody said that
@christopherbrown5409 for some reason i feel like if there was a man taking over 9000 photos of his sleeping wife for years there would be more backlash from commenters. many have a bias within them that they probably don’t think about and i noticed i had that too a little bit before reversing the roles and i felt very grossed/creeped out. i tried imagining if my man would have done this to me. so i thought i should be equally against it if a lady did it to a man
@@helixxia9320divorce over taking photos? I think that is a overeation. He’s not overreacting for feeling creeped out but I think what he should do then is to have a conversation of tell her to stop, then if she doesn’t that’s grounds for a divorce.
@@katc2040 except D'angelo's unprincipled ass
You started posting daily around the time of my first major relationship break up. These vids are one of the highlights of my day and have helped distract me and make me feel happy for having my own interests again. thank you
6:22 I haven’t dated in years & was pondering it today & spent 15 minutes deciding that, no matter how small the dating pool for me is, I absolutely cannot with horoscopes
At least the first guy has an alibi if he’s ever questioned “where were you the night of -?” He has photographic evidence
was mid cutting my hair into a 'weird' cut compared to my usual look by the end of the video, and to hear D'Angelo go "don't do it" scared thE SHIT OUTTA MEEEEE
but thanks for saying it looks fantastic!!
8:42 I’m a writer, and my ex boyfriend straight up refused to read anything I wrote or would just skim it uninterestedly. It was pretty annoying.
17:54 my anxiety response is more like me wondering what the surprise is gonna be until it happens lol. its like a more positive version of being a worrywart. if i dont forget about it, it will keep popping up in my mind 😅
2:04 my toxic a*s would have been flattered, like omg he's obsessed with me. Call me sleeping beauty😂
Shane is so unprofessional. 💀😭😂😂😂🤣💀
The bisexual post reminded me of the time that I felt comfortable enough to come out as non-binary and wanted to try my name, and my bf at the time that I had been with for a year told me (“jokingly”) that I waited until he was comfortable so I could trap him 💀 sometimes you’re just done with trying to hide who you are. And while I get that it’s a shock, most of the time comments about being uncomfortable with it screams insecurity and lack of communication
literally. like the fact that you’re coming out to your partner with such personal (and potentially endangering) information shows that you really trust them… and it fucking SUCKS to see that same partner turn around and accuse you of secretly cheating or tricking them or whatever. it takes a lot of trust to come out to somebody and that kind of reaction makes it CLEAR that your trust is not reciprocated
@@cyrus7107 exactly! It was me coming to terms with myself and feeling loved enough to start telling people and then I felt so awful. Now my current bf has never misgendered me and when he does HAVE to use my dead name he apologizes and talks about how weird it feels 😇
NB isn't real. Get over yourself
@@penelopephelange we love a fan 😘
i feel like its slightly different in that this could be a case of just insecurity ("why did she wait so long to tell me? is she in love with another woman?" maybe he thinks shes looking to cheat because of the changing appearance) im not saying thats how it is but thats the best case. no defending your experience with your partner only explaining how i think the reddit situation could just be insecurity and not biphobia
The first story made me feel guilty for taking pictures of my partner sleeping sometimes, BUT mine knows I do it bc I send them to him on Snapchat 😭 He talks in his sleep, so it’s usually to catch a picture of his face after he yelled something that made no sense bc a person grinning from ear to ear while asleep looks goofy 🤣
Yea I had to be like "just for reference I do take pictures of you sleeping because the cat likes to sleep on your head like a fluffy hat and it's Hella cute"
Once in awhile I take pics of my husband sleeping in the morning cause I think he's beautiful, but he's aware of them and they are really rare. Over 9000 is really odd and grounds for a conversation, but not an immediate divorce
If he knows and hasn't complained, don't feel guilty. 😁 Those pics are the best.
I am so happy you are making another one of these videos because the first one was one of my favorite videos you’ve put out recently
The book one strikes a nerve with me. My ex promised to read mine, even took on one of my characters as his own... AND READ LIKE A PAGE. (and tried to edit as he read) That was it. We were together for yearrsssss and I'd been writing longer than I'd known him.
I think the key here is TIME. You've given this woman 11 years and your family. Things like this are 100% valid to feel violated by and want to stop immediately, BUT all that time and love and shared life shouldn't be thrown away without give her the grace and space to ACCEPT that reality and YES I'd feel this way if they were a man too, snarky anti-fems.
Something THIS outside the norm is probably going to take some effort and conditioning to reverse her feelings on. She clearly takes some kind of comfort or joy in this and what's absent is how YOU'D feel, since she never let you know. I believe though, that if that 11 years was really a good 11 years, it's worth the work and effort to try and fix.
If she's not receptive at ALL, then sure you have a real problem but even that could be addressed by OPENLY and LOVINGLY asking for her family help (You were wronged, but if you want it fixed you have to again, have some grace for your family. In this case your wife) and if that has no luck, TELLING HER that this is bad enough to risk your trust in the marriage and see how THAT effects her view of her own actions.
BUT this is what makes me 100% sure this is fake. There is just ZERO other info and anyone who this ACTUALLY happened too would either explain how INSANELY out of the blue this is and explain how other wise great their Wife is, because they are genuinely baffled and hurt.
OR
They would be listing off other red flags from before this, because this post would basically be them trying to console themselves about how the divorce they've BEEN thinking about is justified, cause Strangers also found this to be an insane last straw.
I took a handful of pics of my then-bf sleeping but I told him they existed and I can't imagine taking that many or being so secretive about it. The reason I took them is because he looked cute or in a position that was so strange I had to show him later. And we just laughed about it. Having so many and keeping it a secret is saddening. OCD or another mental health issue is definitely a possibility. Compulsions come in endless shapes and forms and obsessions frequently center around the safety or security of loved ones.
As for the astrology one. I'm suspicious because there's this whole thing about people (men) who refuse to date anyone (women) who are into astrology so it seems either made-up or inauthentic/dishonest. Now taking astrology incredibly seriously to the point of it being your personal gospel isn't a good idea. I enjoy astrology because it's fun. Sometimes using horoscopes to guide my normal everyday decisions or know which direction to look. Discriminating between people of certain signs is dumb.
Bisexual wife is probably having an identity crisis. It's a pretty normal part of realizing or finally admitting to oneself that they're queer or trans. But also she may just be trying the haircut. I really don't like it when men (and women, but mostly men) who suddenly feel their relationship is in danger when their partner realizes/reveals they're attracted to other genders. It's probably based on the myth that bisexual people are more likely to cheat on their partners to "fulfill" some type of innate desire to be with other genders which is bi/panphobia at its most basic.
Also girls born after 1993 obviously "charge they phone" but I think we need to append to that meme, "charge they vape" lmfao
Aw, as someone who takes a bajillion photos of anything before I find one I like, I can see how it might be easy to accrue that many over time. Her only “weird” thing is not deleting the ones she didn’t like.
Back in the day, I saw this tumblr meme that said something to the effect of “we take photos of what we love”, so I imagine she just finds you really precious.
Unless you’re nude in the photos or really compromised, she’s probably just capturing moments she loves you and hates to delete them.
Alternatively, maybe she’s getting off on watching you sleep? In which case it’s also a compliment in a way because she’s stoking her own fire with you
d'angelo your code switches for shane made me cackle 😂😂 i was not expecting it lol
Every night i am so happy to be able to watch another one of your videos, partly because i love the videos and partly because i am happy that you seem to be doing well these days, which inspires me to also try to feel better by cutting our things that drag me down and investing more time in things that give me energy :)
if my SO wrote a book i wouldnt be able to keep myself from reading it i would be so stoked how do these people exist
20:21 All some of these scams only require you to respond. They just need to know the number works. So, probably best to not respond to unknown numbers.
Idk, I do actually know a guy who is tall, British, athletic, very emotionally available, and a nerd... and also a fucking doctor, from a well-off family. Some people are just insane like that. I bully him for it, because he sounds like a description out of a rom com, or the male lead in some YA book.
Shane the weird business owner reminds me of an internship that I applied for when I was fresh out of college and stuck in my small midwestern hometown. The owner wanted me to work full time for 6 months for free and I couldn’t do it, so I politely declined. He sent me an unhinged voicemail about how I was ungrateful, spoiled, and he would ruin my reputation so I would never get a job in my field in my hometown again. (Never mind that the “job” I applied for was literally the only opportunity I had in my field.) luckily my mom knew his dad through church, so I used the gossip train to get him yelled at and moved to California. 😅
D'Angelo: Who doesn't charge their phone?
Me, '95 baby, bisexual, with Hot Cheetos in my hand and phone at 18% battery: WHAT ABOUT IT D'ANGELO?
the Shane company comment had my Colorado butt shaking laughing
We have them in Oregon too, I've had the commercial memorized for like 25 years and went right into it when he said that lmao
Was born after 1993, can confirm that i cant cook, know mcdonalds, charge my phone, twerk, be bisexual, eat hot chip, and lie.
This is one of my fav videos I swear DAngelo is even funnier than usual
The surprise one is weird to me maybe just because my friends talk to my partner. So if its her bday and he KNOWS they wanted to have a girls' weekend, why not just check with her friends? Because of course her friends are going to want to do something for her bday. I dont think anybody did anything wrong. It's just such an easy thing to avoid.
From what the post said they also don't get time for just them two , its either kids stuff or work so him assuming or really both sides assuming she would want to spend time with them for a birthday weekend isn't really crazy to me. Maybe there should have been some talk before but thats how surprises go so really its just unfortunate
I legitimately would not date someone who heavily believed in astrology, and I would tell them it’s a dealbreaker. I’ve spent my entire life becoming me; every single person alive has a different lived experience, dif genetics, culture, hair, skin, etc. that all inform how we begin and who we become. Anyone who wants to tell me who they think I am based on something as insignificant as the day I was born will not be a part of my life. I’ve had complete strangers look at me with DISGUST because of my birthday. I’ve been atheist since I was capable of forming intelligent thought and I cannot stress enough how insane it is that people think they know anyone because of a BIRTH. DAY.
People that astrology dictate their lives are weird because it’s only part of the picture and it’s why it’s not accurate they go in surface level and make it their personality maybe it’ll be more accurate (but not completely) if they used the houses but if you ask any person that does astrology about the houses and stuff they blank when it’s the actual meat of the philosophy 😂
I had someone on a dating app say she could tell I was a Pisces by how my eyes are shaped… I’m not a Pisces. That opening line gave me such an ick. Would my eyes have been shaped differently if I was born two days later as a different star sign? It was a complete deal breaker just for being a very stupid thing to believe.
@@zooh8017 this is sending me
Yeah same for me. Surface level, I don't think I could date anyone who believes in a faith-based theology. Deeper than that, I think there's something cruel about a person who says that things about you that you can't control (like the date/time/location of your birth) in some way predetermine who you are as a person. Obviously it isn't the same thing, but it gives off the same vibe to me as people who think people of certain genders/races carry certain traits "by nature". I'm never going to be comfortable with someone who doesn't look at people as individuals before anything else.
The 9k pictures one feels really gross to me because yeah, *straight* to divorce is a worst-case-scenario sort of conclusion but it’s not just ‘talk about it’ weird. She’s taking the pictures without asking- and because it’s the guy’s wife and not the other way around, a lot of people try to explain it away. Stop and think for a second how scary it would be to find out your spouse has taken *NINE THOUSAND* pictures of you without asking OR even telling you. You have no idea they’ve been snapping pictures this whole time. If one of my boyfriends did that I would genuinely call my dad to come sit with me while I talked to my partner. I would be *terrified.*
I haven't watched the video yet but I say divorce and no-contact for all of them.
If you’re trying to plan a surprise and want to make sure she’s free… wouldn’t you communicate with the friends and say “hey this weekend don’t plan anything!” And hey SHE asked if she could go… he didn’t ask/confirm she was free that day…
Why is it up to her partner to ask the friends about plans? I’m married and I’d think that the friends should be asking her husband about any plans?
My former partner was creating a medical education course based on his and his coresident’s research. Best believe I could recite his research paper, gave editing recommendations, sat through the finished modules, and even partook in the little quiz questions they’d throw in.
That’s just how partnerships work, genuine interest in what your partner’s doing. The wife said it means a lot to her if he read her book, responding with “I don’t like reading” isn’t good enough.
Man, I really feel the horoscope thing. I’ve had a billion more awful experiences with people who truly believed in horoscopes than good ones. The assumptions they make about you as a whole-ass human being because they found out your birthdate are insane, and in my case legitimately harmful.
Yeah, like say the story's real, the girl COULD have been doing it without thinking deeply about whether or not it's true, but even that carries the implication that she is very capable of following beliefs without thinking deeply about whether or not they're true
Yeah the desire some people have to categorise others and explain away all of their actions/behaviours as predestined/attributed to/traits of whatever category they're incidentally in is.... dismissive of individuals, I think
there are so many potential issues with surprise parties/trips/whatever. the loss of control, being put on the spot, everybody watching for your reactions... you need to be a very specific type of person to take all of that in stride
Surprises stress me tf out
6:52 you had the opportunity to say “F for Fake” smh
I personally dislike astrology because it seems like an easy way to scam people, when they write incredibly general things in the weekly prediction thing and such. I also hate it bc im an aries so im supposed to be a strong leader and determined and i wish i was but i'm shy, indicisive and antisocial instead.
Skinny dipping one reads so Midwest to me. Like that's a South Dakota question.
That's what I thought too lol
😂 what does that even mean? Hahahahaha
Agreed tbh
21:20 The Shane Company? Now YOU have a friend in the diamond business.
Honestly, i appreciate how D'Angelo those these react to reddit post. Because he doesnt read them word per word then give an opinion. He summarizes it for us and then state his thoughts. He also includes alot of posts into one video. Making it more entertaining. Like small thing but makes him of the best content creator out there.
First one is NOT overreacting😭 That’s crazy work
Cutting your hair because your coming out as queer in some way is such a mood XD
It's part of the starter pack, for sure! Mine was a Lesbian bob 😂
i love listening to d'angelo wallace speak because i feel like he explains a lot of my autisitc traits (even if he isnt autistic) such as that needing things simple, and he explains it in a way i could genuinely never. ehh, always appreciate you man O.M.W to binge every video over and over again
Yea for that first one, as someone who has thought about taking pictures of my partner while sleeping bc I think they're adorable, I have stopped myself bc I think "how would I feel if they did this to me??" Creeped out. I'd be creeped out. Especially if it was anything more than maybe 2 pictures... 😬