It's absurd how OP had to time and time again explain to commenters that he didn't expect an apology from his gf for reacting the way she did when her daughter first said that she had been SA's by OP, but rather for how dismissive and uncaring she was after the daughter admitted to lying. She didn't give a sh*t that OP's life had almost been irreparably destroyed. If she is that unbothered by false SA accusations then OP is not safe around her. She's not a good person if she thinks that being falsely accused of SA can be dismissed with a shrug of the shoulders which essentially means "you were cleared of the accusations, get over it". An absurd lack of empathy. It feels like she was only with OP for his resources.
But what if he WASN'T cleared? Imagine what his life would have become. Clearly, OP'S GF didn't care one way or another about the outcome. Such a lack of empathy is not only concerning, it's dangerous. I wouldn't trust her OR her spawn from this point on. Besides, since a mere accusation didn't work THIS time, what's to stop his girlfriend's ex from showing his daughter how to provide "evidence," in order to ensure prosecution, and possibly imprisonment? It's not worth the risk.
I was thinking the exact same thing (about him having to repeat himself no less than 500 times) simply because they lack reading comprehension. Yes…she is a child and of course is immature but 13 is still old enough to know better. There needs to be consequences so she doesn’t go around the rest of her life thinking it’s ok to falsely accuse someone of something so serious and possibly life ending. It really doesn’t take much to completely destroy someone’s life. Hell…in fact…it’s actually really easy too. But if she gets a free pass one time…she’ll think it’s ok and that she’d never have to take accountability or face the consequences of her words/actions and will grow up thinking she can get away with pretty much anything/everything
Let’s just remember that OP is also a victim. Every job I’ve ever applied to doesn’t ask have you been charged with anything having to do with SA NO it asks have you ever had SA allegations legally made about you. It can still ruin his life and career
@criert135 Actually, it's for the safety of all. Mall associations have hired mall Santas, and libraries have had trans people doing Story Hour. without doing serious background checks. Later, they were to discover that the employee was a registered sex offender often in regards to children. It is quite necessary to ask AND check.
@@MegaBlackViolet There is an obvious difference between being a registered sex offender and having had a SA allegation made against you. The latter shouldn’t be legal to ask about
Honestly fully agree with OP. The Mum did do the initial right thing, prioritise getting her daughter out of a potentially dangerous situation and contact authorities to find the truth. Which they did. But after the truth came out the first thing she said should have been "I'm so sorry this happened, I'm sorry Daughter said something so terrible about you, I had to be sure but that must have been terrifying for you and I'm sorry for that" like, acknowledging that something really terrible happened and expressing sympathy that he was the one wronged by it. And she definitely has stuff to apologise for! Not for taking the steps she needed to take to make sure her child was ok, that was understandable and the best course of action, but manipulated or not the daughter DID do something wrong and there should have been apologies for that.
she a kid but shes 13 and should know what's wrong from right and if she wants her dad in her life so bad she can live with him and see how she gets treated
Should have filed a defamation, harassment and false allegation lawsuits naming the father and the daughter! Press charges on the false allegations. Now file a restraining order against the father. Letting him off the hook is not good as he will continue this behavior.
You'd never get your legal fees back and he wouldnt stay in jail long, if at all, and being in jail obviously isnt that much of a deterrent for the ex.
@@anon4854 The issue is to get him arrested and on his record! The ex has a history and with each arrest he has every time the police come his way. His life gets harder. Also, going after the father like that makes life far easier for the mother to get the father out of the daughters life who clearly needs to be away from him.
for a defamation claim to actually go through. You have to prove that it caused damage to your reputation. I don't think that is provable in the slightest, sorry. Correct me if I'm wrong
That is for a court to decide. Also it doesn’t just have to be harassment or defamation. It can also be added that emotional damages can be pursued as well! Pushing false charges and the admitted lie by the daughter is more than enough. People and corporations have been sued and lost on far less.
Also, the gf and daughter owe him an apology! As a parent you are responsible for the actions of your child!! You as a parent have a strong teaching moment, you take them and make them accountable, apologize and punish them accordingly! This is missing big time with parents today! They act as if they aren’t responsible and accountable for their kids!
"your gf does not owe you an apology", if she so feels responsible enough towards her daughter to feel that she HAS to trust her over anyone else, then she is ALSO responsible for that trust leading her wrong. She does owe OP and apology so does the daughter. Frankly speaking just like there is a SA registry/list, there should also be one for fake SA claims and the daughter should be put on. It is not a laughing matter either way, when it happens or when it is a fake allegation. Its sad that one is taken seriously the other isnt.
These kind of allegations are crazy toxic,if they get out AT ALL they will never die and you can never get washed clean. Some appreciation for how badly you life was almost destroyed isnt really asking for that much
Lmfao these single cheaters with baggage are the worst kind... Everyone is like suck it happened but its alright... Wat if next time its something worse.... And another false accusations which put him jail forever ?
Okay the gf did what she did to protect her daughter and don’t want to apologise, but she knows what kind of a person her ex husband is (as said by OP @ 4:54), shouldn’t she protect her from him first? Like he used his own daughter as a pawn of his evil scheme. He must have explained/discussed with her minor daughter about SA 🤢 Also she should at least make her daughter apologise.
Exactly. She needs to face some sort of consequence because if she doesn’t…it sets a very dangerous precedent. She will grow up thinking it’s ok to do that kinda shit and ruin a person’s life…all because she wasn’t made to be held accountable or face any real consequence. It’s all too easy to completely destroy a person’s life and she knows it. 13 might still be a child but that doesn’t change the fact that she is old enough to know better and face actual consequences. She needs to be made to realize just how dangerous, stupid, and severe what she did was.
@@karishma_k I have two 13 year old nieces and they both watched this and they both said it was absolutely screwed up to do that to a person that did absolutely nothing to deserve it and being 13 isn’t a child anymore…it’s a teenager and teenagers definitely know right from wrong and also is part of the reason a lot of kids who actually are being abused are too scared and refuse to report their own abuse.
@@karishma_k I think it’s absolute bs when people say “they’re just a kid” to excuse bad behavior. Like…”Ok…at what point do you start correcting said behavior?”
It’s her job to protect her daughter and your job to protect you 😂 she’s done off…ur gf is Sickk too, consequences should’ve been given to the daughter the moment they found out and solidified Op was innocent
Why is this guy even letting it get to relationship level with a single mother? They are good for smash and dash, but the desperate guys let it turn into more, then they get themselves into situations like this. Weekend getaway? Nope, she has kids. Impulsive night out on the town? Nope, she has kids. Intimate dinner with the lights down low tonight? Nope, she has kids. When her kid needs something and the mom doesn't have the money at that moment, is she going to ask the kid's father? No, she's going to ask you. And if you find yourself making a post on Reddit because you got falsely accused of SA, well, you can't say you weren't forewarned.
If my daughter says something like that.. Obviously I would trust her rather than my boyfriend. Yah it might seem harsh... But I am not taking any risks with a predator.... Even if he is innocent i wouldn’t take any chance. Also.. I 100% understand OP. They should just broke it off... Their relationship is already done.. Somethings cannot be forgotten.
The problem is not that,the problem is that you state that you would categorize your man as a horriable things without proof or hessitation in-advance and saying that he is still those things even if innocent
OP is definitely owed an apology from both. I understand the mother needs to get answers, but how about answers from her daughters father and hold that BASTARD accountable for trying to damage another man's life.
people keep saying the mom did the right thing and doesn't owe him anything........she believed her daughter and said she would do it again........the mother was/is totally in the wrong and deserved to get her ass dumped and thrown out.......he did the right thing and in the same situation i would dump her ass too......she should have believed him when he said nothing happened until it proven otherwise........the major thing i disagree with him on is him saying he doesn't blame her for taking her daughters side but he should.......if i was in this same situation i would demand respect from my girlfriend in my own home.......also she believer the daughter and seriously thought he did these things to her and there is no coming back from this on her part...........he said he can't never trust the daughter again but he can't and never should trust the girlfriend again either.....
Brother... Why wouldnt you belive your own child about SA? The mother did the right thing. He also did the right thing. The only mistake this guy made was dating a Single mother... Most important living with her and her child.
It's absurd how OP had to time and time again explain to commenters that he didn't expect an apology from his gf for reacting the way she did when her daughter first said that she had been SA's by OP, but rather for how dismissive and uncaring she was after the daughter admitted to lying. She didn't give a sh*t that OP's life had almost been irreparably destroyed. If she is that unbothered by false SA accusations then OP is not safe around her. She's not a good person if she thinks that being falsely accused of SA can be dismissed with a shrug of the shoulders which essentially means "you were cleared of the accusations, get over it". An absurd lack of empathy. It feels like she was only with OP for his resources.
Like most single M.O.M.s.
But what if he WASN'T cleared? Imagine what his life would have become. Clearly, OP'S GF didn't care one way or another about the outcome. Such a lack of empathy is not only concerning, it's dangerous. I wouldn't trust her OR her spawn from this point on. Besides, since a mere accusation didn't work THIS time, what's to stop his girlfriend's ex from showing his daughter how to provide "evidence," in order to ensure prosecution, and possibly imprisonment? It's not worth the risk.
I was thinking the exact same thing (about him having to repeat himself no less than 500 times) simply because they lack reading comprehension. Yes…she is a child and of course is immature but 13 is still old enough to know better. There needs to be consequences so she doesn’t go around the rest of her life thinking it’s ok to falsely accuse someone of something so serious and possibly life ending. It really doesn’t take much to completely destroy someone’s life. Hell…in fact…it’s actually really easy too. But if she gets a free pass one time…she’ll think it’s ok and that she’d never have to take accountability or face the consequences of her words/actions and will grow up thinking she can get away with pretty much anything/everything
She's already on her way to falsely accusing men when she gets older, and the mom has falsely accused men in the past 100%.
That’s exactly what I said under a comment a little further up. I’d copy and paste it but don’t think I can on my phone.
Dont. Date. SINGLE. MOTHERS!!!
Let’s just remember that OP is also a victim. Every job I’ve ever applied to doesn’t ask have you been charged with anything having to do with SA NO it asks have you ever had SA allegations legally made about you. It can still ruin his life and career
That shouldn’t even be lawful to ask.
@criert135 Actually, it's for the safety of all. Mall associations have hired mall Santas, and libraries have had trans people doing Story Hour. without doing serious background checks. Later, they were to discover that the employee was a registered sex offender often in regards to children. It is quite necessary to ask AND check.
@@MegaBlackViolet There is an obvious difference between being a registered sex offender and having had a SA allegation made against you. The latter shouldn’t be legal to ask about
"Why won't guys man up and date single mothers!?"
Well....
If youre going to date a single mother make sure you live separately and never watch the child.
Honestly fully agree with OP. The Mum did do the initial right thing, prioritise getting her daughter out of a potentially dangerous situation and contact authorities to find the truth. Which they did. But after the truth came out the first thing she said should have been "I'm so sorry this happened, I'm sorry Daughter said something so terrible about you, I had to be sure but that must have been terrifying for you and I'm sorry for that" like, acknowledging that something really terrible happened and expressing sympathy that he was the one wronged by it. And she definitely has stuff to apologise for! Not for taking the steps she needed to take to make sure her child was ok, that was understandable and the best course of action, but manipulated or not the daughter DID do something wrong and there should have been apologies for that.
mom even stated right afterwards, she would turn against OP in a heartbeat if her daughter asks
gtfo
CUT YOUR
LOSS! ITS A WARNING
She doesnt owe you an apology. You dont owe her a second chance.
Part of being a parent is punishing your child when necessary. There is ZERO mention of punishment for possibly ruining OP's life.
It is better to be single than to be in the middle of this kind of drama.
she a kid but shes 13 and should know what's wrong from right and if she wants her dad in her life so bad she can live with him and see how she gets treated
If children younger than 13 can lie about sexual assault, you can be sure that a 13-year-old can improve on it.
Never get involved with a single mother. Especially if she got impregnated by a pos like that. That's always a colossal red flag.
Should have filed a defamation, harassment and false allegation lawsuits naming the father and the daughter! Press charges on the false allegations. Now file a restraining order against the father. Letting him off the hook is not good as he will continue this behavior.
110% this.
You'd never get your legal fees back and he wouldnt stay in jail long, if at all, and being in jail obviously isnt that much of a deterrent for the ex.
@@anon4854 The issue is to get him arrested and on his record! The ex has a history and with each arrest he has every time the police come his way. His life gets harder. Also, going after the father like that makes life far easier for the mother to get the father out of the daughters life who clearly needs to be away from him.
for a defamation claim to actually go through. You have to prove that it caused damage to your reputation. I don't think that is provable in the slightest, sorry. Correct me if I'm wrong
That is for a court to decide. Also it doesn’t just have to be harassment or defamation. It can also be added that emotional damages can be pursued as well! Pushing false charges and the admitted lie by the daughter is more than enough. People and corporations have been sued and lost on far less.
13 years old is definitely old enough to know what is right and what is wrong. She could destroy OP life. No mercy for this girl.
As a 13 year old girl, she knows exactly what could happen to ops life and just because she's 13 does not mean she deserves sympathy.
The girl is 13, she should absolutely be told to apologise and she should have it explained to her that she nearly ruined someone life.
Also, the gf and daughter owe him an apology! As a parent you are responsible for the actions of your child!! You as a parent have a strong teaching moment, you take them and make them accountable, apologize and punish them accordingly! This is missing big time with parents today! They act as if they aren’t responsible and accountable for their kids!
Is it really so hard for her to say, "I'm sorry you had to go through that." Or "I'm sorry my daughter put you through that?"
FFS
"your gf does not owe you an apology", if she so feels responsible enough towards her daughter to feel that she HAS to trust her over anyone else, then she is ALSO responsible for that trust leading her wrong. She does owe OP and apology so does the daughter. Frankly speaking just like there is a SA registry/list, there should also be one for fake SA claims and the daughter should be put on. It is not a laughing matter either way, when it happens or when it is a fake allegation. Its sad that one is taken seriously the other isnt.
Yet another reason to avoid single parents.
Don't pick up and play another man's saved game, it's better to start your own.
These kind of allegations are crazy toxic,if they get out AT ALL they will never die and you can never get washed clean. Some appreciation for how badly you life was almost destroyed isnt really asking for that much
Lmfao these single cheaters with baggage are the worst kind... Everyone is like suck it happened but its alright... Wat if next time its something worse.... And another false accusations which put him jail forever ?
Okay the gf did what she did to protect her daughter and don’t want to apologise, but she knows what kind of a person her ex husband is (as said by OP @ 4:54), shouldn’t she protect her from him first? Like he used his own daughter as a pawn of his evil scheme. He must have explained/discussed with her minor daughter about SA 🤢
Also she should at least make her daughter apologise.
Exactly. She needs to face some sort of consequence because if she doesn’t…it sets a very dangerous precedent. She will grow up thinking it’s ok to do that kinda shit and ruin a person’s life…all because she wasn’t made to be held accountable or face any real consequence. It’s all too easy to completely destroy a person’s life and she knows it. 13 might still be a child but that doesn’t change the fact that she is old enough to know better and face actual consequences. She needs to be made to realize just how dangerous, stupid, and severe what she did was.
@@littlemisstink921 yess 💯💯💯
@@karishma_k I have two 13 year old nieces and they both watched this and they both said it was absolutely screwed up to do that to a person that did absolutely nothing to deserve it and being 13 isn’t a child anymore…it’s a teenager and teenagers definitely know right from wrong and also is part of the reason a lot of kids who actually are being abused are too scared and refuse to report their own abuse.
@@littlemisstink921 yes correct 💯, 13 is old enough to understand, the gf is giving her daughter too much grace..
@@karishma_k I think it’s absolute bs when people say “they’re just a kid” to excuse bad behavior. Like…”Ok…at what point do you start correcting said behavior?”
It’s her job to protect her daughter and your job to protect you 😂 she’s done off…ur gf is Sickk too, consequences should’ve been given to the daughter the moment they found out and solidified Op was innocent
you started to bond as a team. uh that should of been completed before moving in right
Getting a woman to admit she was wrong and apologize? what fantasy world are you living in.
Don't try to create a life with used goods.
idk man, people just like lying all the time on reddit; some of them are soo outrageous😂
Ghost her, walk away and don’t look back, the gf acted perfectly, but how could you voluntarily put yourself into that situation
Why is this guy even letting it get to relationship level with a single mother? They are good for smash and dash, but the desperate guys let it turn into more, then they get themselves into situations like this. Weekend getaway? Nope, she has kids. Impulsive night out on the town? Nope, she has kids. Intimate dinner with the lights down low tonight? Nope, she has kids. When her kid needs something and the mom doesn't have the money at that moment, is she going to ask the kid's father? No, she's going to ask you. And if you find yourself making a post on Reddit because you got falsely accused of SA, well, you can't say you weren't forewarned.
Don't get in a relationship with a single mom
Facts.
Send the kid to her dad if she wants him back so bad, that's genuinely awful on the daughters part.
Guys, here's yet another reason why you should NEVER get with single moms. Dont even shake their hand. Dont even look at them.
Betas out here raising them kids
If my daughter says something like that.. Obviously I would trust her rather than my boyfriend. Yah it might seem harsh... But I am not taking any risks with a predator.... Even if he is innocent i wouldn’t take any chance. Also.. I 100% understand OP. They should just broke it off... Their relationship is already done.. Somethings cannot be forgotten.
Not before suing the sh#t out of them
🎶 🎶 🎶 And now you're a single mom. 🎶 🎶 🎶
@@ErtuğrulBeySon I would rather be a single mom than be with a sex offender
The problem is not that,the problem is that you state that you would categorize your man as a horriable things without proof or hessitation in-advance and saying that he is still those things even if innocent
@@AnUpo17 For the sake of everyone else, yes please stay that way. The dating pool is crazy enough as it is.
OP is definitely owed an apology from both. I understand the mother needs to get answers, but how about answers from her daughters father and hold that BASTARD accountable for trying to damage another man's life.
As said below. Don't. Date. Single. Mothers.
people keep saying the mom did the right thing and doesn't owe him anything........she believed her daughter and said she would do it again........the mother was/is totally in the wrong and deserved to get her ass dumped and thrown out.......he did the right thing and in the same situation i would dump her ass too......she should have believed him when he said nothing happened until it proven otherwise........the major thing i disagree with him on is him saying he doesn't blame her for taking her daughters side but he should.......if i was in this same situation i would demand respect from my girlfriend in my own home.......also she believer the daughter and seriously thought he did these things to her and there is no coming back from this on her part...........he said he can't never trust the daughter again but he can't and never should trust the girlfriend again either.....
Never date single moms. NEVER!
Brother... Why wouldnt you belive your own child about SA? The mother did the right thing. He also did the right thing. The only mistake this guy made was dating a Single mother... Most important living with her and her child.