Cautionary Tales-Jami

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 18 พ.ย. 2024

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  • @jamikatechaos9972
    @jamikatechaos9972 ปีที่แล้ว +1305

    Thank you, Mark, for giving me the platform to share my story! I hope my "cautionary tale" can help someone see that validation cannot come from a drug or relationship, or any archaic unit of external success. Also, thanks to everyone for the empathetic comments! I was a nervous wreck during the interview, and seeing so many encouraging words of kindness truly means so much!

    • @marylougeorge9890
      @marylougeorge9890 ปีที่แล้ว +39

      I’m praying you find a true friend who’ll help you see how amazing you are. ❤❤❤

    • @medokarbo
      @medokarbo ปีที่แล้ว +21

      Keep writing! It is a form of prayer (connecting with God and/or the God within as you mentioned) and a necessity for people like you and me. The world will not make space for you or validate your worthiness, but you know that. Writing will make that space though because by doing so, you honor yourself, your readers, and your God (whatever that looks like to you.) Thank you for sharing your beautiful mind!

    • @amandabarr9263
      @amandabarr9263 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      I so relate to your family background and the feeling of not fitting in. I’m a 37 year old mom of two and my husband is struggling with addiction and in jail right now. So I also see my husband in your story. It’s heartbreaking but hopeful! Thank you so much for sharing. I wish you healing and happiness. You deserve it!

    • @student22044
      @student22044 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      What an inspiring story of survival and self acceptance. You described everything so clearly, it was easy to hear and see you. You’re a brave soul. I hope your life gets easier with your new outlet, writing and sharing with others. I can definitely see how it will support people who want to understand their own experiences. I think after listening to you my son is going through a similar struggle. Hopefully it will give me a better understanding the next time I talk to him. ❤

    • @dubaiedge
      @dubaiedge ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Thank you for your story.
      Are you interested in script writing? Because this is your story, extreme, and many would see if if it went to film. Good luck to you.

  • @parnaerue
    @parnaerue ปีที่แล้ว +387

    When it hits you that high school is over & that you’re basically an adult plus don’t feel like you have life figured out is so depressing & it’s not discussed enough!

    • @banjiegirl2001
      @banjiegirl2001 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Yes!

    • @ryanblanchard2508
      @ryanblanchard2508 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Agree. It’s basically sink or swim.

    • @kimberlythomas4373
      @kimberlythomas4373 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Agreed!

    • @terry4161
      @terry4161 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Unless you have been forced into an adult role since childhood and never experienced a childhood to begin with.

    • @brittneylyntalks
      @brittneylyntalks ปีที่แล้ว +3

      So true! That feeling is overwhelming

  • @SammysMysASMR
    @SammysMysASMR ปีที่แล้ว +162

    "Too conscious to live" i couldn't relate more.
    Man do I appreciate the shit out of you and mark for making this happen. It was an absolute pleasure listening to you speak 🙏🏽

  • @BSFF96
    @BSFF96 ปีที่แล้ว +257

    So many of us feel and act this exact way in our lives, she articulated everything so perfectly. God bless her.

    • @celestialcircledance
      @celestialcircledance ปีที่แล้ว +1

      And I still don't get it. I just don't have it in me to self harm..

    • @manga4774
      @manga4774 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      ​​@@celestialcircledance maybe... maybe self harm comes in many forms. smoking cigs, excessive drinking, over/under eating, under/over sleeping are all acts of self harm

    • @TruthHurtsSoGetAHelmet
      @TruthHurtsSoGetAHelmet ปีที่แล้ว

      @@manga4774 umm no.

    • @manga4774
      @manga4774 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@TruthHurtsSoGetAHelmet u dont think so? ok, well i certainly think purposely causing harm to your own body is self harm, and its absolutely that simple

    • @mindsigh4
      @mindsigh4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@manga4774
      agree, just the fact that most people think ( the voice[s] in the head) compulsively, a lot of uncomfortable, non-helpful thoughts, & to different degrees, some peoples inner dialogue is wall to wall full of downright malicious, cruel, accusatory torment directed at themselves,
      & if that's not self harm, what is?
      no scars, who would know, but i drank to get away from that voice, i mean, a light buzz felt good, but the way i was drinking was poisonous & felt awful but it was a reliable literal ''get away'' from myself. but i learned from Eckhart Tolle to notice what my mind is up to & not let it get on a rant *without questioning it*

  • @serenalisa1
    @serenalisa1 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    Beautiful JamiKate! My lil bro died from alcoholism in July and he believed he wasn't worthy, had nothing to offer...essentially the LIE this disease tells us.....my heart is broken....your perspective really helped me see his death in a different light. I'm 16 yrs sober and I so understand your "feelings". Grateful you are sharing your story and you have TODAY❤

  • @rudyinvegas
    @rudyinvegas ปีที่แล้ว +122

    Love all the "relatable" messages after this one. We're all out here trying to find a way. A way to live, way to love ourselves, and way to sometimes exist in such a crummy set of circumstances. GL Jami!

    • @vietdungnguyen6612
      @vietdungnguyen6612 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      the way you put relatable in quotation marks makes it sound like sarcasm LOL

    • @nicolesawyer7117
      @nicolesawyer7117 ปีที่แล้ว

      Completely agree I was surprised by the comments. I guess that’s a good thing lol

  • @ayanasdollyworld5630
    @ayanasdollyworld5630 ปีที่แล้ว +378

    Wow!!! It's refreshing to hear this from another person. If I could do life over again, college would be nowhere on the radar. I hated every second of it. Instead of finding a wonderful career and making gobs of creative friends, I became a self-destructive mess. College is not for everyone. It's a lie that is peddled especially to young women. Instead of getting married and raising children, we're convinced that becoming a slave to a job we hate is more fulfilling. But what if you do enjoy the job? The minute you get sick or unable to work, you're no longer useful. And out the door you go. The boss of the company will not check up on your well being afterwards. You are forgotten and replaced.😞

    • @cincinnatifunk
      @cincinnatifunk ปีที่แล้ว

      The men are here. They don't want us.

    • @1Whipperin
      @1Whipperin ปีที่แล้ว +50

      Feminism has sold women the trip to Hell.

    • @AlexHernandez-gn6rd
      @AlexHernandez-gn6rd ปีที่แล้ว

      Women ...
      Lol
      You fell for the boss bitch mentality and when you realized it's about making real decisions things got hard ?! You females did it yourselfs. It's hard taking a male role ay ?!
      Don't blame us men you didn't and neither did the guest but I'm just saying for our sake. Don't blame us.

    • @PTPB1
      @PTPB1 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      Im qualified to draw a 4ft banana using charcoal from my time at art college

    • @jamesmalcolm6976
      @jamesmalcolm6976 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Thanks for sharing that. We have all been conned

  • @doncarleone973
    @doncarleone973 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    I don't know what else to say Mark but this girl really opened up my mind. I wish I could have given her a hug through the screen.
    Wow man. What a story!

  • @tinaparker9345
    @tinaparker9345 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    You have a powerful message!
    As a lifetime struggling addict, I understand everything you've ever felt and went through.
    You are IRREPLACEABLE!
    Our society doesn't understand US.
    Keep writing!
    You will have your purpose!
    Hugs

    • @terrytownsend5583
      @terrytownsend5583 ปีที่แล้ว

      IRREPLACEABLE

    • @4Beats4Me
      @4Beats4Me 3 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Irreplaceable is the word here. We are ÀLL uniquely vital in the big picture. Did anyone ever give you the option of God - if you care to think about a higher power for the purpose of opening your heart & mind.

  • @belindamoore3518
    @belindamoore3518 ปีที่แล้ว +29

    This woman speaks to my soul! Thank you for sharing! I wish you all the best!

  • @chattsignal
    @chattsignal ปีที่แล้ว +139

    For me, Jami’s story is the most relatable of the many many SWU interviews I’ve watched. I hope all the best for her in the future. (and what is her book?? please provide a link) ☮️

    • @jessicajohnston8513
      @jessicajohnston8513 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Agreed!!!

    • @leahgarcia7613
      @leahgarcia7613 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Same

    • @yanifree114
      @yanifree114 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Definitely… Jamie articulates so well..now I’m wondering if I too have borderline personality. No matter the title I too have learned to accept and love myself. It’s taken a very long time. God has given me the strength to persevere.

  • @wikilee8928
    @wikilee8928 ปีที่แล้ว +54

    Indeed, you have to learn how to live with yourself. Thank you, Jami, for that insight. I believe you can be a great counselor helping other people.

  • @tarahj478
    @tarahj478 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    This is such a relatable story, she explains the mind /mental health & often times hidden issues better than any of my past therapists did. ❤

  • @chicofrijoles
    @chicofrijoles ปีที่แล้ว +8

    I can see myself in all these people I've been watching on this channel. It's so therapeutic to listen to them. It helps me figure out so much about myself and why I think the way I do.

  • @baghodler508
    @baghodler508 ปีที่แล้ว +62

    Addicts carry a lot of guilt and shame. You try to hide and stay high just so you don't have to face reality.

    • @pambeforethestorm9784
      @pambeforethestorm9784 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Exactly 💯 and it's really sad 😢💔 I have high hopes for her tho, she is sharing her story and that takes a LOT. Much respect to Jami

    • @wesleyAlan9179
      @wesleyAlan9179 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @J C
      ...don't drink the kool-aid

  • @benwaldenmusic
    @benwaldenmusic ปีที่แล้ว +34

    She says she comes from a background where it doesn't make sense for her to be an addict, but she grew up in a part of the country where pharmaceutical companies flooded communities with opioid medications. The timeline she mentions of her adolescence and college years was when the opioid epidemic hit Appalachia hard-- toward the beginning of that era, before it was in the public consciousness. Even if her family consisted of productive, middle class, mostly functional people, she grew up around the fallout of the crisis. Maybe this environmental influence indirectly contributed to her early mental health struggles. Certainly, mass opioid addiction in her geographical surroundings fed into a culture that she was surrounded by once she started experimenting with drugs.

    • @zzbudzz
      @zzbudzz ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Yeas! During the War in Afghanistan in 20+ years over 500,000 Americans overdosed and died of opioids! What was Afghanistan known for ?

    • @donnabittner69
      @donnabittner69 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      ​@@zzbudzz , poppies ! Lots of poppies. It is all so tragic. 😢

  • @Frozen_Smoke1972
    @Frozen_Smoke1972 ปีที่แล้ว +50

    This is a fantastic piece. Jami's such a fierce intelligence and she's got a great turn of phrase, it's just amazing to listen to her speak about her experiences. Good luck to her.
    By the way - does anybody know what her book is called?

  • @kg89808
    @kg89808 ปีที่แล้ว +57

    The first 5 mins into this really struck me. Not everyone finds themselves in college, and the rush get there is often implemented junior/senior year in highschool. Those with anxiety suffer with worry. I feel for this young lady.

    • @ashlielove6513
      @ashlielove6513 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I don't think I met anyone who found themselves in college either. For most people that doesn't come till their 30s or 40s.

    • @oliveheadwhoa
      @oliveheadwhoa ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Agreed! I dropped out after one semester and now have a house and a great paying job. We all need to find our own path in life. Sometimes it takes time and that's ok!

    • @mothmos
      @mothmos ปีที่แล้ว

      college kids and people in their early 20s are just way up in the clouds, ungrounded, lost and lacking in backbone, including myself. Found myself and a business that reflects my truth only in my 30s. Looking back at how insecure, dumb, immature and codependent I was in my 20s was just ugh.. cringe XDD People are obsessed with youth and being young but looking back at my younger days, yeah, no, I never want to go back there again XD

  • @lesliemarvin160
    @lesliemarvin160 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    What a beautiful person . Loved this upload. My husband has BPD and he's an addict. Watching these stories help me understand him more. We've been together 20 years and I have always known he suffers but not until his diagnosis with BPD have I really truly started to understand the amount of pain and discomfort he lives with every single day. We are growing through this. Together we will live a life to be happy with.
    Thanks for this share. Gives me hope.

  • @augusthavince8909
    @augusthavince8909 ปีที่แล้ว +30

    No, no, no, no. It isn't her "unchangeable" personality disorder. She was put under pressure to be something, the image, of a good student and daughter rather than her getting to grow organically and find her true personality. Good grades and good behavior are a by-product, but she was pressured to make it a personality.
    The cautionary tale is the whitebread existence, expectations and community that puts everyone under some pressure to be seen in a certain way. So as not to rock the fragile boat of whitebread-edness (that word may have racist connotations, but since I have lived in and around it and I'm white, I use it). Some people are okay to live that way, at least as a public persona (whitebread communities have been known to hide some pretty taboo or horrible things behind closed doors, and everyone keeps their mouth shut). And the tricky thing about it is that it looks like a good life and upbringing, like you had all the opportunities handed to you. Unless a person can correct the pressures or neglect that is within themself, all the so-called "good things" are emptiness.
    I think she needs to get in touch with the child that tried to hide as a peanut-sized being and find out what she wanted to do, what her real dreams were. Maybe she still needs to dream those dreams and follow through with them (perhaps in the form or art). If she is anything like me, she'll be a late bloomer in psychological development. That's just my impression.

    • @Mrs.TJTaylor
      @Mrs.TJTaylor ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Amen! We tie our egos to an impossible standard. And often it’s forced on us by parents who need us to be seen as successful for their own ego gratification. (To be fair, many parents really believe that whitebread existence is the way to happiness.) We’re all flawed and vulnerable with strengths and weaknesses. EVERYONE, not just me. Learning this saved my soul.

    • @melanieduke5816
      @melanieduke5816 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      So true and well said...as Gabor Mate says..."why the pain?". Something happened/happens back there in the family that wounds the infant/child psychi to the core. We will have no actual memories of anything but something did happen to her/us. She doesn't know but spends the rest of her life trying to feel good and get rid of the emotional pain.
      Maybe Somatic therapy or pylisiban (sp?) treatments. We cannot "think" our way out of this emotional pain.

  • @Allegra11
    @Allegra11 ปีที่แล้ว +28

    Intelligent, beautiful and brave ~ It's beyond sad she spent so long unable to see/feel her amazingness. Thank goodness she found her light 💛

  • @ellp152
    @ellp152 ปีที่แล้ว +30

    My daughter went to college, we very much encouraged her to go!!! she has a great career and family!, my son did not go to college and we didn’t want him to go, we would have thrown money away, and he didn’t want college anyway, but we wanted him to do something though and so he went to Welding school and now is doing fantastic!! Good parents should know there kids and should know if they are just pushing or encouraging what is best!❤😊

    • @michele21auntiem
      @michele21auntiem ปีที่แล้ว +1

      My grandson wants to go to welding school. Any advice?

    • @jasonokay
      @jasonokay ปีที่แล้ว

      ​@@michele21auntiem casting foundry jobs

    • @michele21auntiem
      @michele21auntiem ปีที่แล้ว

      @@jasonokay thank you. He is looking at trade schools to get his certification.

    • @tahittadiaz
      @tahittadiaz ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I agree with you!

    • @ellp152
      @ellp152 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@michele21auntiem tell your grandson to get every certificates they offer, they cost 💲 for each but under 200$ , because regardless the kind of welding he wants to do, he will have a better advantage because he can do more with more, my son got all they offered, now he can go anywhere if he doesn’t like working we’re he’s at now. And he can own his own business if he wants.
      Good luck to your grandson!

  • @lilithpowers9686
    @lilithpowers9686 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    This story is sooooo relatable. I remember going through all of the same things...Been sober since 2016 now.❤

  • @5RRRtarRiver
    @5RRRtarRiver ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Just a minute or two in, I knew you’d done a whole lot of work on yourself. Actually done recovery, done therapy. Utmost respect and solidarity to you. Let’s heal.

  • @patigirl2470
    @patigirl2470 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Jami is such a likable person and has so much to offer ♥️ I feel like she realizes that now and i hope she continues to write. Thanks for this one Mark 😎

  • @caseygiglio3373
    @caseygiglio3373 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    A thoughtful, intelligent, and insightful woman. I hope she finds her own groove in this life. She deserves to have every opportunity to share her soul with the world; and world would be better for it.

  • @tammic2016
    @tammic2016 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    I relate to so much in Jami’s story. College broke me. Then a career I didn’t really want tried to finish the job. I would love to read her writings. Mark can you provide us with some information on this? And to Jami, I’m so glad you’re still here fighting. You’re worthy. Thank you for sharing your story. Best wishes for your future ❤️

    • @marylougeorge9890
      @marylougeorge9890 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I hope you’re life has improved. ❤

    • @tammic2016
      @tammic2016 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      That’s kind of you to ask. Yes it’s fine.

    • @marylougeorge9890
      @marylougeorge9890 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@tammic2016 ❤️

    • @michele21auntiem
      @michele21auntiem ปีที่แล้ว +2

      ​@@tammic2016 i dont know if u saw but Mark pinned Jami's comment at top of thread. That may be a way to ask her there because she is responding to each person who answers her. ❤

    • @tammic2016
      @tammic2016 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@michele21auntiem I did see that and thank you!

  • @StrawberryFields4ever65
    @StrawberryFields4ever65 ปีที่แล้ว +60

    Jami, is such a beautiful woman. She's so smart and lovely, but sadly, doesn't recognize her own beauty. By beauty, I mean not only an outer beauty, but an INNER beauty that's so so special. Not everyone sees their "gift"! I hope that Jami recovers and REALLY recognizes her worth. Such a beautiful woman.... inside and out!!! Stay around Jami, this world needs more women like yourself 💘

  • @nosolar2023
    @nosolar2023 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Keep going Jami...it took me 50 years to find what I love ...I am still like you ...I feel as tho I don't fit in ...but now being 59 I don't care ...I love who I have become ...I found my career at the age of 50! Keep going Jami!
    You will find what fulfills you and makes you content ! And remember happiness is fleeting moments! Life is pretty sucky and unfair ...we just take it one day at a time !!

  • @little-miss-happy
    @little-miss-happy ปีที่แล้ว +19

    Jami your story is so amazing! I love how you describe wanting to sit still enough to shrink. You are strong - thank you for sharing.

  • @justin_smith556
    @justin_smith556 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    What a captivating interview. I'm glad you're here to tell your story and hopefully help others who are currently where you once were.

  • @GobravesOO
    @GobravesOO ปีที่แล้ว +17

    You know it a good one when mark doesn't talk

  • @tumanyopinions5883
    @tumanyopinions5883 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Thank you for doing this interview Jami.. May you continue to be blessed ❤️

  • @JNeuel
    @JNeuel ปีที่แล้ว +8

    In my opinion the most fascinating guest in a while.

  • @lydiapurple
    @lydiapurple ปีที่แล้ว +5

    You put into words things I have felt and thought but have been unable to express. It really means a lot. Thank you for sharing your story.

  • @Frenchie_007
    @Frenchie_007 ปีที่แล้ว +67

    She verbalized being a “cautionary tale” very well.

  • @heather4189
    @heather4189 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    I'm so thankful for to hear this! Thank you for telling your story.

  • @Pikkiwoki
    @Pikkiwoki ปีที่แล้ว +13

    She's so beautiful and interesting and reminds me so much of myself, this is the first time I've sat down and watched the whole video without pausing 20 times to do other things. It's so difficult for intelligent people sometimes to find meaning in life.

    • @Pikkiwoki
      @Pikkiwoki ปีที่แล้ว

      And like everything she says about love ugh, so me.

    • @florairvan8305
      @florairvan8305 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Maybe Mark relates
      partially to some of her
      story, as do alot of us,
      including myself. We
      can all say "me too".

  • @SickandTired95
    @SickandTired95 ปีที่แล้ว +37

    It’s FRIGHTENING, but also somewhat reassuring how much I can relate to her. That is, minus the hard drugs.

    • @joshuaolmstead5225
      @joshuaolmstead5225 ปีที่แล้ว

      Except for that....nobody here knows you and nobody was here to judge you tell that statement

    • @goodgolly4726
      @goodgolly4726 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      ​@@joshuaolmstead5225 ?

  • @andreamontemayor9635
    @andreamontemayor9635 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I'm with you Jami, also come from a loving educated family and I've always felt different and like something is wrong with me, I live everyday wishing I wasn't me and hoping to find happiness, been to therapy multiple times and at 32 years old it still hasn't changed much. My drugs are eating and daydreaming a lot. You are not alone.

  • @Shortkonner
    @Shortkonner ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Hey girl. I'm BPD and bipolar also. I also was not abused and am a heroin addict... In recovery, I'm not abusing my Suboxone and I'm in therapy. I wanted to tell you I liked hearing you speak, and I wish you the best of luck.

  • @miriamluskberry
    @miriamluskberry ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Jamie I have a feeling you are in a large group of like minded people who have gone through very dark years of life. I identify with much of your experience.
    All my life I thought I was the only one who felt this way. A reunion about 20 years ago I discovered I was one of many women who went through similar experiences. This was enormously helpful for me going forward and I hope for you as well.

  • @maryreid3387
    @maryreid3387 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Thank you Mark- your material is so Educational!!

  • @deborah7164
    @deborah7164 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Your story and how you shared it made SO much sense to me. Thank you. Thank you

  • @jordanwood183
    @jordanwood183 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I’m from Georgia, and the way she talks is very familiar to me, her accent I mean. I grew up hearing everyone sound like that. Also, I identify with a lot of the feelings she’s describing. Bless her 🙏🏼

  • @erickag5215
    @erickag5215 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Good morning from Miami.
    Glad she never gave up on herself. You are so much stronger than you think.

  • @skullkitten4775
    @skullkitten4775 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Thank you for sharing your story. What you have explained is my exact life. And ive never been able to explain how i feel and you hit the nail on the head.

  • @TingTingalingy
    @TingTingalingy ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Miss I think you're a fantastic person to speak to children. Growing up, I never had former users with lifelong affects of what drugs did to them, just stories.

  • @patriciawilson6978
    @patriciawilson6978 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Thanks for sharing your story, Jamie.

  • @caitlinangulo9695
    @caitlinangulo9695 3 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I connect so much to your story😩 I’ve always felt as though I were “too conscious to live”
    My life also ended up revolving around heroin just to escape the feelings inside my head/body
    I have 6 years clean. Things are better, but the fight against myself will never end I don’t think.

  • @BecomeConsciousNow
    @BecomeConsciousNow ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Jami you are lovely, I want you to know that! I know you said you didn't have a traumatic childhood but your mental illness disorder (bipolar/borderline) comes from some kind of dysfunction in your childhood. So please don't blame yourself, none of it is your fault. I can see how insecure you are by how little eye contact you had with Mark, so I would assume you did not have a secure attachment with your mother or that you felt unconditionally loved by your parents. I think you know the way out of your painful existence and that is to love yourself just as you are. Eckhart Tolle has got it right, the real you is pure love, peace and joy and can never die. Try not to identify with your thoughts and emotions because that is not who you really are. Your true essence is whole and perfect. You are whole and perfect. Try to connect with your true essence through being present because that's where true peace and love is. I wish you the very best!

  • @stratos175escape7
    @stratos175escape7 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Young lady you have such a bright future ahead of you. I've watched many of these videos and you stand out as a leader, use that strength to lead, reverse all this energy you are using to damage yourself and use it to teach and help others. You have the ability in you, I can hear it in the way you speak, with honesty, feeling, believe, humbling and truthfulness in every word. FOCUS on yourself and all of this natural wellness you have will spread seeds to help others. I'm a stranger to you but I believe in you.

    • @terywetherlow7970
      @terywetherlow7970 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I agree, Stratos.

    • @TheKawasaki250
      @TheKawasaki250 ปีที่แล้ว

      Telling someone they are a leader after watching one edited video interview is fucking stupid.

  • @gabrielaortiz6463
    @gabrielaortiz6463 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    It's crazy because my therapist told me that when your parents don't fight it can be just as damaging because you don't know how to handle your problems. You're so self aware you will get better, sending you love

  • @Nelsells1
    @Nelsells1 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    your sincere testimony gives me hope. Thank you.

  • @antonleimbach648
    @antonleimbach648 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Jami’s story made me feel good about myself. I hope she writes a book because I would love to read it. I’ve got stuff to deal with and there is a camaraderie between those who have struggled and I felt that today. Thank you Jami, best wishes to you!

  • @armcrescent
    @armcrescent ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I was so, so, glad to hear that you've been finding your way to self love and self acceptance. Ive had to discover these things too after living with chronic mild depression, so I realize what a huge accomplishment it is that you've gotten to this point. I hope you will continue to grow with the support of others. You are Wise!

  • @tarag6616
    @tarag6616 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Jami you definitely have a purpose in this life! ❤ I think it's amazing to hear your story because it shows how many times God was there for you even when you didn't care about yourself. I believe when you came face to face with death you realized you do have a purpose and that you're meant to be here, problems and all. I'm sorry you had to go through so much suffering to get to where you are today but it sounds like all of the hell you went through convinced you there's a Heaven. I'm grateful you're still here! 🙏😊

  • @archieg8009
    @archieg8009 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    The mental health systems in the US are filled with people who lack the capacity to care. I know there are some people in the system who genuinely care, but finding them is such a challenge.

    • @marylougeorge9890
      @marylougeorge9890 ปีที่แล้ว

      Truth! There’s a Lot of Idiots in the mental health system.

    • @carleebollin825
      @carleebollin825 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      I think they also need help, so much of our system is reliant on exploiting workers so they are just trying to move from one thing to the next

  • @caitlinnance9431
    @caitlinnance9431 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Sending you so much love Jami. You're so relatable and I'm so thankful you're hear to share your story ❤

  • @slappythesquirrel4766
    @slappythesquirrel4766 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I hope this woman knows she is heard. She reminds me allot of myself and my life. Thank you for sharing your story

  • @TruthHurtsSoGetAHelmet
    @TruthHurtsSoGetAHelmet ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I hate social media. It has royally screwed humanity up BIG TIME.

  • @jroc00725
    @jroc00725 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Best interview you’ve ever done,not taking nothing from your others but this one just hit different. I see she mentions a book but I can’t seem to find any kind of information.

  • @joyclover3529
    @joyclover3529 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    That was so well articulated. What a story and thank God she lived and got sober. I was in active addiction for a decade and it took my ex, who had been a good friend for years before we dated a few months, who tried to “save me” and get me sober (and I just couldn’t do it we both had our own demons and issues and I felt we were just better as friends and it was unfair for him to be with me in the state I was in so I broke up with him and went back to the street life),who a few months later took his life, for me to stop using. 3 months later I got pregnant with my daughter and now she’s my reason for staying clean. I’ve never heard anyone phrase addiction the way she did and the reasons why she chose to use which lead to the addiction but it is exactly how I felt and what I thought. So well put and will hopefully help people who haven’t experienced addiction understand a little better. Hope you are doing well and continue to if you see this❤

    • @monicabroussard840
      @monicabroussard840 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      But she never answered mark when he asked about how she is doing now. She just promoted her book.

    • @joyclover3529
      @joyclover3529 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@monicabroussard840 my guess she talks about her life now in the book and that’s why she chose to answer that way and you can write a book and still everything be true so not sure what you’re trying to get at here…

  • @Cocked_dolly_grip
    @Cocked_dolly_grip ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Out of all the interviews I’ve watched so far, I have not related to any of them more than I did to Jamie. Our paths are so vastly different but the despair in not understanding why you think the things you do and feeling like you’re going crazy because you keep finding yourself in situations you don’t know how to get away from. I could see myself in Jamie and while her story breaks my heart, it also bursts with happiness that she has found herself and peace.

  • @cookieDaXapper
    @cookieDaXapper ปีที่แล้ว +6

    ....imposters syndrome pushed to the extreme,.....by having a "good life" that felt undeserved, she follows the path of "self destruction". Dear Sister PEACE be with you, and God's grace cover you, and his Love shine on, in and through you. YOU are worthy of a "good life"; given or earned.

  • @Jeff-hy1eb
    @Jeff-hy1eb ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Yours is a hell of a story, Jami. I'm glad that you found a moment of clarity in that terrible throat-cutting incident. I wish you well and hope that you find some peace and satisfaction in your life.

  • @millie9919
    @millie9919 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Definitely a ‘cautionary tale’ on the pressure to disassociate from one’s authentic self in order to please others. It’s CRUCIAL that we do things that make US happy. I get the feeling that the self-harm was a mechanism for a release.

  • @keetykeetymeowmeow
    @keetykeetymeowmeow ปีที่แล้ว +2

    The last main sentence made the entire story worthwhile: "How sad is it that people die without knowing what they're good at, that they also have something to offer..." (paraphrased). 🥺

  • @shauden10
    @shauden10 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Such a smart and insightful lady. So much power.

  • @ayyy5372
    @ayyy5372 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This was incredibly relatable. Thank you for sharing, and congratulations for successfully continuing on your journey in this wild, unpredictable ride we call life.

  • @TonyInIR
    @TonyInIR ปีที่แล้ว +18

    Can't help but hope her child/children will benefit from her sobriety and have a stable mother to be with them.

  • @laurashade6208
    @laurashade6208 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I have been going to therapy for over a year now, and instead of BPD, I was diagnosed Autistic. Have you ever looked into ASD for women/girls? So much of your behavior and stories of growing up, reminds me of myself, aside from drugs, because I'm terrified of drugs. But the emotions and internal dialogue mimics my own 💙

    • @Chazer45
      @Chazer45 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@deuphoria2587 you’re missing the mark.

  • @vglow5271
    @vglow5271 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    What a great interview....love her story and the way she told it.❤

  • @lx2495
    @lx2495 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Addiction does not discriminate. If you are human you are vulnerable to addiction. It does not matter your background, good or bad.

  • @myeyeswentdeaf6213
    @myeyeswentdeaf6213 ปีที่แล้ว +54

    Good Morning Everybody!👋🤓or whatever time-a-day it is for you. Peace and Love from 6:00am Brooklyn NY🇺🇸 to you and wherever in the world🌍 you are.

    • @Teresa-rf7vg
      @Teresa-rf7vg ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Good Morning from South Carolina.

    • @carrielopez1728
      @carrielopez1728 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Morning from New Hampshire!

    • @miss_treeliv8204
      @miss_treeliv8204 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      5:12 am here in Ontario, Canada. Good morning to you too😊

    • @Bachconcertos
      @Bachconcertos ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Good morning from Queens NY

    • @Rochelle721
      @Rochelle721 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Hey, good morning Eyes!🌅 Its just after 3:00 here in California.💟☮ I send my love, & hope that youre well fam!

  • @lcarota
    @lcarota ปีที่แล้ว

    As someone who lives with anxiety, it took so much strength and courage for her to do this lengthy personal interview. Way to go Jami, you did a great job!! Although I'm not an addict, I can still relate to the self sabatoge of the dialogue we tell ourselves and not ever feeling good enough. I struggled with that during all throughout my childhood and I never grew out of it. I'm still very insecure to this day. I'm thankful I never tried drugs because I know that if I did and it numbed me to my inner demons I'd be hooked instantly.

  • @RAINRDY
    @RAINRDY ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Outside of addiction issues, as I can't imagine I'd ever personally struggle with them, I really identify with a lot of what she said, about herself and otherwise. It's definitely a weird feeling when everyone looks up to you, to one degree or another, and thinks you're the one who has got it all figured out, but you know how unbelievably wrong they are. It creates this impossible situation where your world view gets skewed, and you're trying to live up to others' expectations and views on you and your capabilities, while not even knowing where you stand yourself. Stuff like that takes a toll, but I'm happy Jami was able to finally make some sense of herself, and her life, and find things she's good at and that she enjoys.
    Thanks for taking the time to share your story, Jami! All the best!

  • @charlesmcgrosky2324
    @charlesmcgrosky2324 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Jami, thanks so much for telling your story. I'm certain that it will ring with many, many people. I wish you all the luck in the world and I hope that you will find your way to a better future!

  • @jgee343
    @jgee343 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    This story from the peanut to MRSA to IV meth to being stabbed 42 times...your story is damn near identical to me. This is nuts. Wow. Thanks Jami for sharing this. Wow.

  • @Elly3121
    @Elly3121 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I’ve never felt so stressed out listening to these videos except hers. The way she talks made me so anxious that I couldn’t even finish it. Her anxiety is contagious!! That’s brave of her doing this interview while being super anxious💪👏

  • @thefadingmoonlight
    @thefadingmoonlight ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I resonate with so many of the things she said. I wish her all the best ❤️

  • @darrendallas8387
    @darrendallas8387 ปีที่แล้ว

    Exactly everything you said has hit home.
    I've just turned 39 last Sunday and now I'm a yr clean trying to get things together.
    Self destructive.
    Love and peace and thank you for sharing your story

  • @leiamata8591
    @leiamata8591 ปีที่แล้ว +75

    What an amazing story Jami. I can relate to how you have felt your whole life and a lot of the feelings you've had and some of the things you have been through. I don't want you to take this the wrong way but have you ever considered that you are autistic or neurodivergent? Undiagnosed autistic women are commonly misdiagnosed as borderline and/or bipolar and also suffer from addiction, depression and anxiety and tend to cut as well. My whole life I have felt the way you have and it wasn't until I figured out that I was autistic that everything made sense and why life was so hard for me. There is more research now on women and autism compared to in the past. I don't mean to diagnose or mean any disrespect in any way. I just felt your story was so relatable and felt so familiar that maybe that could be an answer for you as well. I wish you all the luck and would love to read your book. Thank you for your story.

    • @scarab9762
      @scarab9762 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Wow I was wondering the same thing. I'm in a relationship with an autistic woman and there are certain things about this interesting woman who remind me of my partner. She was misdiagnosed as bipolar and OCD and anxiety. She found out she was on the spectrum in her 40's. I think knowing she's on the spectrum answered a lot of questions and helped her a lot. She's an amazing person and a great life partner. We both understand her condition and it's no big deal. I have a strong hunch that this lady is on the spectrum and doesn't know it.

    • @veronagrey6313
      @veronagrey6313 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I think you are onto something here … I Disagree with the Bi-Polar and BPD Diagnosis…

    • @hnybee113
      @hnybee113 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I work with autistic kids. Yes!! I agre3 100 with you.

    • @kellirogers4708
      @kellirogers4708 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Worth looking into. Love to you, Jamie! ❤

  • @daniellemagerowski4506
    @daniellemagerowski4506 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

    I was on Heroin for 3 years. From the age 24-27, I gave myself Hep C. My body ended up fighting it off. I’ve been clean since 2017. I can’t believe everything you went thru and you’re still here! Thank you SO MUCH for sharing your story Jami. You’re a strong, resilient, gorgeous being and you deserve all of the happiness the world has to offer.

  • @merwynnerdbayne
    @merwynnerdbayne ปีที่แล้ว +5

    ❤ Jami, please get your story out there! you are so brave! your story resonates with my soul. You are stronger than you know!
    Mark, You are a Saint that walks among us, please keep doing the amazing work you do!❤

    • @Hi-bl8rm
      @Hi-bl8rm ปีที่แล้ว

      Ugh she just did her story out there. Lol

    • @yourmomonglol
      @yourmomonglol ปีที่แล้ว

      ​@@Hi-bl8rm Shut up !

  • @zsazsarose
    @zsazsarose ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I cry listening to you Jami. Because I too have a lot of
    These same things that torment me. I’m glad
    You came on to tell us your story hunny❤You’re cute nervousness and all!!! I hope you can rest in your life now and say l DO MATTER! Cuz u do

  • @sluggo55
    @sluggo55 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Amazing story! I can relate to almost every word. Jami, you deserve to be alive! Hope I get to read your stories!

  • @nrobots8013
    @nrobots8013 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Beautiful words without romanticizing the shit of it all. I love this person.

  • @MagsT_UBU_IBMeBee
    @MagsT_UBU_IBMeBee ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Jami, well done, Lovey. Love yourself and try not to base that love on what you accomplish or not. I remember once, when my hubs came home from work and asked me how I was doing. My answer was, terrible I didn't get anything done today. He replied, I didn't ask what you got you done, but how you are.... epiphany indeed for me...light bulb moment! Stark difference on how i was treated at home with my patents. btw, I was home on maternity leave at the time. We all go through stuff, and we need to give ourselves and loved ones a break sometimes. Much love, Jami ❤❤❤

  • @jeffwylie5899
    @jeffwylie5899 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    I love this chick! She's a case study in complex addictive thinking. It's easy to hide when you're someone like this. If you only see her from the outside she can look normal enough to pass. Scratch the surface and it's a whole other story. God bless you girlfriend. Stay clean .

  • @geneaikenii1092
    @geneaikenii1092 ปีที่แล้ว

    So glad to see Miss Jami doing so much better. Bless her heart. I can definitely identify with Jami in struggling with her feelings of inadequacy, and fear. And in the use of substances to quiet the storm inside her head. Thank you, Mark, for another fine piece of work and in bringing us another true life story from those that have walked that long, cold, dark path that is... the "Soft White Underbelly" . Peace. Later.

  • @banjiegirl2001
    @banjiegirl2001 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    Her anxiety is palpable. I was barely able to keep listening as she barely took a breath between sentences.

    • @chrisk7091
      @chrisk7091 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Yes I keep fast forwarding to get to the point it was a very hard watch.

  • @mnelson1960
    @mnelson1960 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

    Wow. Thank you, Mark for letting us hear from Jamie. She gives voice to so many!

  • @MsAdventure531
    @MsAdventure531 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Not everybody derives happiness and joy from a husband and children.

    • @bovineknievel410
      @bovineknievel410 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Just like everyone doesn't derive happiness from debt from college and spending all day working in a cubicle.

    • @marylougeorge9890
      @marylougeorge9890 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      True. But it is ok if they do.

  • @nancyel281
    @nancyel281 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Jamie, you're so hard on yourself. I think you're amazingly strong and brave. Be as kind and merciful and forgiving of yourself as you are to others. You are worthy to be loved. Love yourself, you matter.

  • @rachelcordova1110
    @rachelcordova1110 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Thank you Jami, for sharing your story. You are so brave! Im so glad youre alive and you just being here is your gift to the world and to your Self. To the interviewer: i feel like you kind of cut her off as she was trying so hard to finish her story. Its not a good feeling to be cut off when one is almost done soeaking, inly to hear, " Ok, thank you for sharing your story." She should have been allowed to wrap it up herself without being prodded and cut off. Just saying. Overall, Jami, you are Powerful, and so is your story. May you continue to heal body, mind, and, spirit. 💜

  • @kimstephenson3876
    @kimstephenson3876 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    An amazing, courageous woman. I really appreciated hearing Jamie's story.

  • @beckymellon8135
    @beckymellon8135 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    ❤ I love these kind of stories and appreciate the honesty immensely!!! Thank you for sharing ❤️✌️🤞

  • @MEL2theJ
    @MEL2theJ ปีที่แล้ว

    Incredible interview! 💎
    Jami described things in a way that I'd never heard before.
    It brought to light a greater understanding.
    Thank you Jami and Soft White Underbelly

  • @zj2850
    @zj2850 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    They say drug addicts are selfish bc they only care about how they feel, basically they worship their feelings, but Jami you have such a beautiful way of thinking about things, I relate to you tremendously, especially when you talk about never feeling like you had a place in this world, I decided to make my own place, whether I’m alone or not, thanks for your story