DOOM: ANNIHILATION is an Abomination | Cynical Reviews

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  • @CynicalReviews
    @CynicalReviews  4 ปีที่แล้ว +326

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    • @adamlakeman7240
      @adamlakeman7240 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I keep forgetting Doom 2019 was a thing. It was advertised for five minutes and then nothing. Thanks for watching this for us.
      Heaven knows bugger-all anyone else did.

    • @addictedgamer3372
      @addictedgamer3372 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Plzz review this no fap thing.
      Peoples wants to know
      🤑 You making Awesome video. 💛

    • @marianatheschizoid5912
      @marianatheschizoid5912 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Wait... They made another Doom movie?

    • @VulpusArmory
      @VulpusArmory 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      I though that Hardcore Henry proved we could make a first person perspective movie, and why not find and replace with Doom?

    • @JimmehRulez
      @JimmehRulez 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      No

  • @bromachrome
    @bromachrome 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4205

    I don't understand how it can be so hard to make a Doom movie, it's very simple. Just take John Wick, give him a massive suit, color correct the movie to red, replace the humans with demons, have a metal soundtrack, you are done.

    • @BlackstarSI
      @BlackstarSI 4 ปีที่แล้ว +344

      100% !! It sucks too because Doom Eternal just makes you want a life action film done right even more! The amount of story and action you can portray is vast.

    • @Hammerhawk117
      @Hammerhawk117 4 ปีที่แล้ว +252

      The problem is that they are trying to make DOOM 3 movies. The one that's always forgotten.

    • @STOKERMATHALLAN
      @STOKERMATHALLAN 4 ปีที่แล้ว +62

      John Wick must have Blazkowicz blood

    • @asher8754
      @asher8754 4 ปีที่แล้ว +168

      But they fail at even that. Doom 3 had atmosphere and suspense and genuinely decent creature designs. This movie is like a kid friendly version of doom 3 and the first doom movie was just some lame sci fi channel movie with doom slapped on it. I honestly don’t know what’s worse the one that uses more creatures and weapons but fucks up the plot, or the one that keeps the overall plot(demons instead of mutant) but fucks up everything else.

    • @nnickplays9713
      @nnickplays9713 4 ปีที่แล้ว +36

      Because it wasn't meant for that. This thing was made for the sheer purpose of maintaining their hold on the movie rights.

  • @PossumReviews
    @PossumReviews 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2264

    It's actually physically impossible for a fusion reactor to explode.
    From Wikipedia:
    _Unlike nuclear fission, fusion requires extremely precise and controlled temperature, pressure and magnetic field parameters for any net energy to be produced. If a reactor suffers damage or loses even a small degree of required control, fusion reactions and heat generation would rapidly cease. Additionally, fusion reactors contain only small amounts of fuel, enough to "burn" for minutes, or in some cases, microseconds. Unless they are actively refueled, the reactions will quickly end. Therefore, fusion reactors are considered immune from catastrophic meltdown._
    _For similar reasons, runaway reactions cannot occur in a fusion reactor. The plasma is burnt at optimal conditions, and any significant change will simply quench the reactions. The reaction process is so delicate that this level of safety is inherent. Although the plasma in a fusion power station is expected to have a volume of 1,000 cubic metres (35,000 cu ft) or more, the plasma density is low and typically contains only a few grams of fuel in use. If the fuel supply is closed, the reaction stops within seconds. In comparison, a fission reactor is typically loaded with enough fuel for several months or years, and no additional fuel is necessary to continue the reaction. It is this large amount of fuel that gives rise to the possibility of a meltdown; nothing like this exists in a fusion reactor._

    • @CynicalReviews
      @CynicalReviews  4 ปีที่แล้ว +583

      Interesting. Thanks for pointing that out!
      This is definitely one of those movies where the more you think about it, the worse it gets.

    • @Guderian2
      @Guderian2 4 ปีที่แล้ว +235

      But but.... Timer.. and possible Explosion and sciency- Stuff and thinga-ma-bob and..
      Yeah sorry i can't do that with a straight face.
      Did you really expect a Writer to actually do some research?
      There are so many movies (especially historical) where there are uncountable numbers of mistakes that could have been avoided with a 5 Minute Google Search.

    • @AlBeau3216
      @AlBeau3216 4 ปีที่แล้ว +124

      @@Guderian2 don't you know the rules? If you take the time to do even rudimentary research, none of your work will ever see the light of day, you'll die homeless and alone.

    • @oofiexist1601
      @oofiexist1601 4 ปีที่แล้ว +49

      I'd like to see a collaboration with you two one day

    • @ninjawiz7932
      @ninjawiz7932 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Thank you. This was honestly my biggest issue with the movie.

  • @bisexualichigo4227
    @bisexualichigo4227 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1515

    More like Doom Elimination of a potential movie franchise.

    • @asher8754
      @asher8754 4 ปีที่แล้ว +43

      I prefer doom stillbirth cause this movie was dead to begin with. Also memo to me that could be a bitchin new doom game title

    • @shepard1175
      @shepard1175 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Doom inebriation is more like it

    • @maximeteppe7627
      @maximeteppe7627 4 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Let's be honest, Doom is not the best vehicle for a movie franchise. Which makes it fun to imagine adaptations of, but a nightmare to actually adapt.
      On the other hand, the gratuity of the violence and lack of a traditional plot could actually prove liberating to better filmmakers to make it there own.
      By which I mean the franchise could (in theory) be turned into a successful gory comedy in the style of army of darkness just as well as into a visceral action movie in the style of john wick or the raid.But for it you'd have to fill in the blanks with something worthwhile.

    • @cartooncritique6625
      @cartooncritique6625 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@maximeteppe7627 Yeah, there are some video game franchises that just wouldn't make for good movies and are better used as inspiration than a hard adaptation.

    • @spiderjeranimo4992
      @spiderjeranimo4992 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@maximeteppe7627 a Doom movie in the style of Hardcore Henry would be perfect

  • @lordglitch4266
    @lordglitch4266 4 ปีที่แล้ว +466

    "Because this is a horror movie, remember"
    And that's the main problem, DOOM isn't really a horror series! Like sure, it can be scary, but it's not really horror at all, it's an ACTION game, and Doomguy specifically is the most horrifying thing about the series, demons are scared of HIM, not the other way around

    • @ZeldaMaster64
      @ZeldaMaster64 3 ปีที่แล้ว +41

      The only thing to fear is fucking up....that and the Doomslayer.

    • @kankeydong2500
      @kankeydong2500 3 ปีที่แล้ว +40

      The closest thing to a horror was DOOM 3 and the pov of a demon as the doomslayer aproaches.

    • @broopdefloop
      @broopdefloop 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      The closest horror aspect of doom eternal would be the slayer gates, those were horrifying and filled me with fear and rage

    • @lianglianggoh2753
      @lianglianggoh2753 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      they wont be when its the Journalist playing as the Doomslayer.

    • @Grim_Sister
      @Grim_Sister 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      It’s basically like saying American McGee’s Alice is a cutesy bright fun adventure.
      No, Alice is an actual horror game with a puzzle platformer setting. Yes, there’s action, but there are many horrors as well

  • @alongtheborder7778
    @alongtheborder7778 4 ปีที่แล้ว +185

    Funniest part of this: They claim that Phobos is called the "doomed moon" because it's an "unstable environment." They're trying to make it sound like a SUPER HARDCORE and DANGEROUS environment.
    It's actually called the "doomed moon" because its getting closer to Mars at a rate of 1.8 cm a year and will crash into the planet in about 50 million years.
    So...I guess it's "unstable" if you're talking about a 50-100 million year timeframe but that doesn't actually seem like the biggest danger in the world to me.

    • @Thiccness_Is_Delicious
      @Thiccness_Is_Delicious ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Why the fuck are people adamant on settling Mars then when it'll face an extinction level event far worse then the meteor that took out the dinosaurs 😂

    • @Azorees-oj5zr
      @Azorees-oj5zr 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      @@Thiccness_Is_Deliciousbecause by the time it becomes an actual problem, we’ll be able to deal with it easily.

  • @danieltaulbee9888
    @danieltaulbee9888 4 ปีที่แล้ว +442

    14:48 No no no, see, the zombie extras were used over and over without changing clothes to give the movie that authentic "limited number of character models" feel

    • @viscountrainbows6452
      @viscountrainbows6452 4 ปีที่แล้ว +41

      I'd give you a laurel crown but I doubt it'll fit over your GALAXY BRAIN

  • @julianpradarodriguez7336
    @julianpradarodriguez7336 4 ปีที่แล้ว +643

    At least the old movie had cheesiness, the rock and Karl urban

    • @Hammerhawk117
      @Hammerhawk117 4 ปีที่แล้ว +75

      I honestly have always liked the DOOM movie and still put it on for a stupid good time

    • @Largentina.
      @Largentina. 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      It's Karl, you imbecile. How dare you spell Judge Dredd's name wrong?!

    • @CanImakeamilliondollars
      @CanImakeamilliondollars 4 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      Don't forget the awesome first person sequence at the end, it was dope. The fight sequence between the rock and Karl Urban was good too.

    • @shinobicl
      @shinobicl 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Nooo, it was terrible!

    • @Maldracai
      @Maldracai 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@shinobicl Terrible movie. But a fun movie.

  • @asher8754
    @asher8754 4 ปีที่แล้ว +537

    Doom is literally the simplest video game adaptation to make. Buff guy+gun+demons+metal soundtracks in space mix in the gore and boom box office gold. What does it say about the intelligence of people In Hollywood that they can’t get this?

    • @alexandresobreiramartins9461
      @alexandresobreiramartins9461 4 ปีที่แล้ว +51

      The WHAT of Hollywood people again?!?

    • @asher8754
      @asher8754 4 ปีที่แล้ว +60

      Intelligence you know that thing that most people in the entertainment industry have to completely give up in order to get ahead. Along side ethics and morals.

    • @Ramsey276one
      @Ramsey276one 4 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      The first one with the Rock was almost perfect.
      AND THEY MADE IT WORSE???

    • @asher8754
      @asher8754 4 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      Yeah 2005 was not perfect but they were at least on the right track just had to change the main plot to be closer to the games and drop the main characters sad woe ways me crap

    • @gieron666
      @gieron666 4 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      there's a live action trailer called "fight like hell" for Doom 2016, just do that but as a whole movie

  • @Marb315
    @Marb315 4 ปีที่แล้ว +515

    "it's a video game adaptation" is not an excuse anymore, Castlevania has had three excellent seasons of tv on netflix that manage to make a genuinely compelling story out of an NES game with incredible action and animation, with enough differences from the original story to keep it fresh for people that already know the story, and just enough tasteful fanservice to make anyone who's played the games before to get just an extra bit more out of the experience. It's been done before, it can be done again, I'm just not quite sure when more studios will let people who are both talented and passionate about the source material make these adaptations.

    • @fightingmedialounge519
      @fightingmedialounge519 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Passion can lead to close minded approach. Just look at last airbender.

    • @josesosa3337
      @josesosa3337 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      For different reasons I did not like castlevania season 3.

    • @TheBonkleFox
      @TheBonkleFox 4 ปีที่แล้ว +47

      Detective Pikachu was able to do its own thing while still working as a Pokemon story. Sonic The Hedgehog was actually kind of fun due to you not needing to be "in the know" on sonic lore to understand it, and knowing the lore just gives you extra bits of enjoyment (like how the tribe that attacked longclaw at the start of the movie was most likely the Knuckles Clan). There just isn't an excuse anymore.

    • @fischeborne9713
      @fischeborne9713 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Can we settle for people who are willing to read, and use the source material instead?
      I've learned over the years, that just because you're passionate, doesn't mean you're going to do right by every other fan out there.

    • @notavailable8201
      @notavailable8201 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Let's add Dragons Dogma in that mix now haven't watched the series yet on Netflix but hope it's good since I'm a fan of the game

  • @Goldnfoxx
    @Goldnfoxx 3 ปีที่แล้ว +224

    "We call them gates."
    "So, what are they?"
    "Gates."

    • @SirButtface3000
      @SirButtface3000 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      my thought xD

    • @Phantom_Zer0
      @Phantom_Zer0 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      "we call them gates"
      "so, what are they?"
      "gates"
      "who invented them"
      "bill gates"
      "well that explains the demons".
      that would have made the movie worth it.

  • @Crazed-oi3bs
    @Crazed-oi3bs 4 ปีที่แล้ว +720

    “Who needs a Doom Slayer?” Well your movie studio apparently.

    • @lastpringle8904
      @lastpringle8904 4 ปีที่แล้ว +43

      Real question there is Who DOESN'T need a Doom Slayer?

    • @thefanwithoutaface8105
      @thefanwithoutaface8105 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Preferably to shoot this movie in the head.

    • @StarkeRealm
      @StarkeRealm 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Ironically, the production did not have the rights to the 2016 game. Their license only extended to Doom 3 (and possibly the previous games.) So, even if they'd wanted to, they couldn't have used the Doom Slayer, (and if I remember correctly, the film was already through principle photography before Doom 2016 was announced. This thing sat in the can for years.)

    • @jono_owa
      @jono_owa 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@StarkeRealm then do DOOM GUY

  • @Arcanilumia
    @Arcanilumia 4 ปีที่แล้ว +351

    You missed one thing with the fusion reactor:
    It actually poses pretty much no threat at all. A fusion reactor, in the case of a malfunction, kind of just... stops.
    It doesn't explode or anything, if it's broken or malfunctions, it just stops and the power goes out thanks to the very nature of fusion power.

    • @Novasky2007
      @Novasky2007 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Yeah but they take ages to relight.

    • @calemr
      @calemr 4 ปีที่แล้ว +43

      "He said Nukular! Must be dangerous!" - Too fucking many people.

    • @cartooncritique6625
      @cartooncritique6625 4 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      Say It With Me Now! Nuclear Reactors ARE NOT Atom Bombs! XD

    • @angelgarciabv1001
      @angelgarciabv1001 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@Novasky2007 they dont even exist

    • @Novasky2007
      @Novasky2007 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      th-cam.com/video/y_J8bD_Pq_w/w-d-xo.html

  • @geardog24
    @geardog24 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1281

    Well this movie succeeded in making the first a masterpiece.

    • @ulfrick11
      @ulfrick11 4 ปีที่แล้ว +59

      The first was at least enjoyable.

    • @pandagamer-hg5be
      @pandagamer-hg5be 4 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      _That was the real plan all along..._

    • @solaire2271
      @solaire2271 4 ปีที่แล้ว +34

      The only thing I remember from the first movie was respecting that one soldier who was trapped in a hole with a hell knight.

    • @ruraladventurer1884
      @ruraladventurer1884 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Nah, they're both horrendous

    • @solaire2271
      @solaire2271 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@ruraladventurer1884 He just meant relative to each other, if we did it in comparison to our normal standards, yeah they're both trash.

  • @AmericanRX
    @AmericanRX 4 ปีที่แล้ว +176

    Uhm.....why is there so many human actors in a movie about a game that involves only a few humans and a metric ton of demons!?

    • @extrasalt5303
      @extrasalt5303 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      this was a problem with the first doom movie, wanna know why? Well it's cheaper to have a bunch of zombies from Sprit Halloween then demons.

    • @Batchall_Accepted
      @Batchall_Accepted 4 หลายเดือนก่อน

      This is exactly what I was saying by the end of it. They could have had a half good B movie if they had cut the rest of the soldier dudes out of the film and focused on Joan, actually flesh out all that bullshit they barely mentioned, shorten the movie, and spend the money you saved on 4-5 decent action sequences like the final one
      We're past needing redshirts to die off randomly. There's other ways to keep a movie interesting. Especially cause doom was always a solo experience anyway. This movie couldn't decide if it had a main character or not for the first two thirds

  • @helifalic
    @helifalic 4 ปีที่แล้ว +86

    man 1: "There's only 2% power, we need to get the generator back on before it runs out and everyone dies"
    man 2: "How long do we have?"
    man 1: "The exact length of a typical movie"

  • @lordofgeese2739
    @lordofgeese2739 4 ปีที่แล้ว +931

    This is what happens when a group of people who have never played Doom before look at a walkthrough of the first level of the original game and go , yep , we understand this franchise completely!

    • @lizardlegend42
      @lizardlegend42 4 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      In fairness it's more accurate than the 2005 movie

    • @lordofgeese2739
      @lordofgeese2739 4 ปีที่แล้ว +71

      @@lizardlegend42 More accurate , but it's still a piece of shit.

    • @Scallycowell
      @Scallycowell 4 ปีที่แล้ว +47

      You know you fucked up when the first Doom movie is a better representation of the franchise. “It’s just a zombie movie in space, right guys?”

    • @schibleh531
      @schibleh531 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      What's there to understand about Doom? Guns go boom, demon go kaboom and that's about it.

    • @shepard1175
      @shepard1175 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Hamza Shukri This movie is supposed to be like doom 2016 which has a great story

  • @venusharuna4187
    @venusharuna4187 4 ปีที่แล้ว +727

    Is doom girl’s hair wet throughout the entire movie or is it just REALLY REALLY greasy.

    • @Largentina.
      @Largentina. 4 ปีที่แล้ว +149

      It's wet with grease.

    • @theactualtsl
      @theactualtsl 4 ปีที่แล้ว +43

      both

    • @USMCasper
      @USMCasper 4 ปีที่แล้ว +48

      She's always MOIST!

    • @Air_Serpent
      @Air_Serpent 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      I thought it was just gel that women use for curly hair hair

    • @DerMeister821
      @DerMeister821 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @Andrew Whiting you win.

  • @firemaker1258
    @firemaker1258 4 ปีที่แล้ว +913

    To make a good DOOM film, just follow these steps:
    1: Take Hardcore Henry
    2: Replace Henry with the Doom Slayer.
    3: Replace the humans with demons.
    4: Replace cities and motorways with broken mars bases and hell.
    5: Add all the guns from DOOM
    6: Add the demons
    7: Add gore
    8: Profit!

    • @alexl6644
      @alexl6644 4 ปีที่แล้ว +43

      You should be directing movies with a mindset like that. Love the idea.

    • @geofff.3343
      @geofff.3343 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      @Jeff Bridger But you still need a good idea.

    • @firemaker1258
      @firemaker1258 4 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      @@omegaretro8907 Hardcore Henry is a first person action film, and it is what a doom film should be like.

    • @coolbeans3752
      @coolbeans3752 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Heavy Metal

    • @chrisbyford2943
      @chrisbyford2943 4 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      You forgot to add:
      Gender/racial diversity
      Female empowerment
      Evil straight white male protagonist
      Anti Trump politics
      Seizure inducing cgi with a giant laser beam that shoots into the sky
      Marketing campaign that insults potential viewers and blames them when it flops

  • @CuhShark
    @CuhShark 4 ปีที่แล้ว +202

    "Doomguy wouldn't work as a protagonist"
    Look at Mad Max Fury Road. Max is the titular character and the one we follow through the film, but Furiosa is the actual main protagonist. Just do something similar with the Slayer and you've got yourself a DOOM movie.

    • @luke_fabis
      @luke_fabis 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      The intern guy from the Doom Eternal DLCs would fit the bill really well.

    • @Eshtian
      @Eshtian 2 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      @@luke_fabis neh we need Isabella from animal crossing

    • @crestothegecko6279
      @crestothegecko6279 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      @@Eshtian screw it. Use daisy as the main character and have doomguy ferociously protect them

    • @Eshtian
      @Eshtian 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@crestothegecko6279 ah yes, the famous actor **bunny**

    • @crestothegecko6279
      @crestothegecko6279 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@Eshtian animals can show emotions on film if the director knows what they're doing. Plus i think it would just be neat

  • @ablosch2452
    @ablosch2452 4 ปีที่แล้ว +55

    I should also mention that the demon enemies in this movie are apparently the Imps. In the games, the Imps were among some of the easiest demons, and here the cast have a difficult time killing just one. The zombies were also more easier enemies too. Shows how much the marines and protagonist of this one must suck at fighting.
    And yet no other enemies besides Zombies and Imps show up in this game. They could've added Cacodemons and Pinkies and Revenants and maybe a battle at the end with a Cyberdemon. But no, just the two most easiest types of enemies in the game, portrayed as major threats to these guys.

    • @dagamerperson3720
      @dagamerperson3720 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      If they added more, these unexperienced soldiers could've died. Then we would've been saved from this movie.

    • @Thiccness_Is_Delicious
      @Thiccness_Is_Delicious ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Bro they wasted the whole budget on the demon dimension scene or whatever it was lol

  • @nguyenquyetthang1326
    @nguyenquyetthang1326 4 ปีที่แล้ว +905

    "We are not involved with this movie" - Id Software

    • @ulfrick11
      @ulfrick11 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @Andrew Whiting I hope they do.

    • @smittywerbenjagermanjensen4737
      @smittywerbenjagermanjensen4737 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Andrew Whiting Stop it doom isn’t a good game to make into a movie the devs themselves have said the story in doom DOESN’T FUCKING MATTER

    • @KevinTheProto5019
      @KevinTheProto5019 4 ปีที่แล้ว +54

      @@smittywerbenjagermanjensen4737 While yes, doom may be absolute all guns and glory and not about the lore, I'm pretty sure people still would like to see a correctly executed version of a doom movie, and not some syfy bootleg alien movie.

    • @NoelistAvenger
      @NoelistAvenger 4 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      @@KevinTheProto5019 I think the best way to make a good Doom movie would be to have a main cast of regular UAC soldiers doing their best to survive a demon outbreak, then at some point they find themselves facing impossible odds and all of a sudden, a door gets kicked open, heavy metal starts, and that huge buff guy comes in and casually slaughters the fuck out of every single demon before leaving without speaking a single word and the UAC soldiers would be like "what the fuck was that ?" and it would be the best thing ever.

    • @richtofen9352
      @richtofen9352 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      @@smittywerbenjagermanjensen4737 there is plenty of lore like for example doom guy kills demons because they killed his bunny and his great grand father is the wolfenstein guy and his dad is commander keen

  • @casper6405
    @casper6405 4 ปีที่แล้ว +257

    I love it that ID software themselves said that they've got nothing to do with this movie basically they hate this garbage to

    • @KiomonDuck
      @KiomonDuck 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I bet it's their secret favorite movie.

    • @Emeraldkyber
      @Emeraldkyber 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      @@KiomonDuck no

    • @trdjyt1330
      @trdjyt1330 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      @@KiomonDuck oh hell naw

  • @skirwan78
    @skirwan78 4 ปีที่แล้ว +546

    Cast and Screen Writers Meeting: "Show of hands, who here has played Doom, in any iteration in the last 30 years?"
    Several people raise their hands
    "You can all get out"

    • @331coolguy
      @331coolguy 4 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      Vahlir well all of the shit talking they were doing to the doomslayer on Twitter. Might as well have done that.

    • @aagh8714
      @aagh8714 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@331coolguy they didn't shittalk

    • @parjai97
      @parjai97 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@331coolguy Any... source?

    • @dragenfire68
      @dragenfire68 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@parjai97 look up doomgirl on twitter you'll find enough.

    • @parjai97
      @parjai97 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@dragenfire68 plenty of usernames, which one?

  • @lycianempire
    @lycianempire 3 ปีที่แล้ว +53

    I unironically love the first Doom movie. It's so bad that I love it. The Rock betraying you? Karl Urban making sadfaces at the camera? 100% into that garbage heap.

    • @Xenobears
      @Xenobears ปีที่แล้ว +5

      It’s a guilty pleasure for me, too. It’s the enjoyable kind of cheese, like a rich queso dip.
      Annihilation… was clearly the kind of cheese that was left out to age too long… in a swamp… and now there’s weird growths all over it.
      I’m sure someone out there likes it, but not me.

  • @nayt3440
    @nayt3440 4 ปีที่แล้ว +45

    Heres an idea for the opening shot for a doom film
    A UAC squad that is heavily wounded and low on ammo trying to make a stand against tons of demons, when all hope is lost. There is nothing but silence and then... the sound of a shotgun cocking, the demons face to the source of the sound finding a large figure in green armor drenched in blood. a slow metal riff plays, anticipating what the fans now will happen. all hell breaks loose and then the final shot before the title card show the recreation of the iconic box art of Doom 1...

    • @broopdefloop
      @broopdefloop 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      They could've made this an amazing movie if the main character was more of like a sidekick, they were helping out but at times they went on there own to open up security gates and be like vega, and then through the security system we see the slayer well, slaying

    • @crucaderd
      @crucaderd 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      As soon as he appears on screen, “At Doom’s Gate” plays!

  • @roguereaver634
    @roguereaver634 4 ปีที่แล้ว +409

    A funny thing is that the tension is hinging on a Fusion Reactor going into a meldown. Unlike Nuclear Fission reactors, Fusion Reactors physically cannot have a meltdown

    • @dun0790
      @dun0790 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Yeah wouldn't it either just turn into a bigger star/reaction or collapse into a black hole? My knowledge is very basic but how can a ball of hot plasma melt down,into what?

    • @wanderinghistorian
      @wanderinghistorian 4 ปีที่แล้ว +48

      @@dun0790 Hello other Jason. It's important to realize that, as of now, artificial fusion reactors don't exist. They are purely theoretical, and some scientists doubt we could ever produce one. The only natural ones in existence are stars. Fusion is so hard to pull off, that if power to a reactor did fail, the reactor would just turn off and the gas would cool. No meltdown, no explosion.
      Fission reactors, however, are powered by the fissile materials (uranium, plutonium) themselves. The fuel rods generate the energy naturally and this energy is focused and harnessed by the reactor chamber which is full of things like neutron reflectors and control rods that assist in this process. The heat from the fuel turns water into steam which turns a generator to make electricity. If a reactor loses power, it means the workers can no longer manipulate the core via those control rods, etc. and the fuel can start producing more and more heat unchecked until the fuel is so hot it melts (a meltdown) through the core and into the ground, corrupting it with radiation. This is what happened at Chernobyl, where they intentionally did this to test the reactor at very low power. Unfortunately they went too far, made mistake after mistake, and the fuel became so hot so fast that it vaporized the water causing a steam explosion. The reactor was totally exposed to the open air and the fuel melted down, causing a massive release of radiation. It's a fascinating thing to study, but it's by no means the only nuclear accident. I highly recommend the TH-camr Plainly Difficult who has a lot of videos on nuclear accidents.
      This is why fusion reactors are the goldilocks of energy. They are perfectly clean, produce wicked amounts of energy, and are basically completely safe. It's also probably a pipe dream, sadly.

    • @dun0790
      @dun0790 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      @@wanderinghistorian why am i always the other jason even in my reply anyway thanks for the explanation mate good job my small mind actually understood it.....i think lol shame about it being a pipe dream the thing that always mystified me was how would you control the reaction wouldn't you need enormously powerful magnets that could move stars? By which point if you had that kind of technology wouldn't there be other less complicated methods to create energy.

    • @Orion_Fritz
      @Orion_Fritz 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      @@wanderinghistorian Fusion reactor DO exist. They just don't produce a net positive amount of energy.

    • @Vektorien545
      @Vektorien545 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      @@dun0790 Just because the only natural occurrence of a fusion reactor is a star doesn't mean all reactions have to be at that magnitude to work.

  • @RokonGaming
    @RokonGaming 4 ปีที่แล้ว +579

    It's like this movie was directed by a bunch of game journalists.

    • @aagh8714
      @aagh8714 4 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      gsmes journalists play flrtnite XD

    • @fattiger6957
      @fattiger6957 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Lol. Best comment here.

    • @darklord884
      @darklord884 4 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      "I wrote a blogpost about this about why I f@cking hate video games. Because this is what it does, it feeds into the...like...male fantasy?"

    • @buddyboi7007
      @buddyboi7007 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Polygon, the movie

    • @therealplaguerat
      @therealplaguerat 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Director:
      Dean Takahasi

  • @suprshin
    @suprshin 4 ปีที่แล้ว +684

    The film was already dead when the cast was saying “who needs doom guy?“ no one liked that

    • @duydao8381
      @duydao8381 4 ปีที่แล้ว +87

      im kinda fine if they decided to go with a DOOM GIRL, just make her wear armor that cover everything, run around killing demons with super arsenal and heavy metal music.

    • @ridhosamudro2199
      @ridhosamudro2199 4 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      @@duydao8381 So, basically Crash from -Unreal Tournament- Quake?

    • @ameancas1408
      @ameancas1408 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@ridhosamudro2199 Crash is from Quake... Wtf dude xD

    • @night-seeker666
      @night-seeker666 4 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      Hell, even Doom 2005 had a Doomguy!

    • @kelp7060
      @kelp7060 4 ปีที่แล้ว +91

      @@duydao8381 Normally we would be fine with a Doom Girl, but we know what they really meant when they said “who needs doom guy?“.

  • @ethzero
    @ethzero 4 ปีที่แล้ว +218

    Fun fact: Sean Bean played every zombie and the keyboard.

    • @Emeraldkyber
      @Emeraldkyber 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Lol

    • @Saif-zf9vb
      @Saif-zf9vb 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Seen Bean

    • @bkk397
      @bkk397 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      He played the keyboard on the corner of that one scene? What a thespian!

    • @oculttheexegaming2509
      @oculttheexegaming2509 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Speaking of Sean Bean, it's astounding how the only films where his character doesn't die are Troy, Silent Hill and Silent Hill Revelations.

    • @rickardkaufman3988
      @rickardkaufman3988 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@oculttheexegaming2509 Also Ronin, The Martian, Pixels, and Possessor.

  • @XoADREADNOUGHT
    @XoADREADNOUGHT 4 ปีที่แล้ว +33

    As someone who worked as QA at Bethesda Softworks 8 years ago (I'm a programmer now), I can assure you that the QA testers are solid.99.9% of bugs you find in a Bethesda game were found. They were DEFERRED by the product owners or programmers based on the level of effort involved to fix them (or other reasons). Hell, remember that bug in Skyrim where a giant sends you skyrocketing into the atmosphere? That was found in the first week that manual testing began on the game. I know because I've seen the bug ticket. A lead programmer said, "leave it. it's... funny".

    • @crusader2412
      @crusader2412 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      And you know what, they were right.

  • @prismaticbeetle3194
    @prismaticbeetle3194 4 ปีที่แล้ว +180

    "talking to kids and family in any movie" = dead character

    • @kieranschafer5180
      @kieranschafer5180 4 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      Tarek Chamas “close to retirement” = dead character

  • @OrangeyChocolate
    @OrangeyChocolate 4 ปีที่แล้ว +150

    The name of the ship’s AI is a reference to Doomguy’s pet rabbit, Daisy, who was killed by demons during the first invasion.
    I’m sad now.

    • @cartooncritique6625
      @cartooncritique6625 4 ปีที่แล้ว +32

      Wasn't that also the whole reason why Doomguy was super pissed in that game?

    • @McBadassish
      @McBadassish 4 ปีที่แล้ว +31

      @@cartooncritique6625 One of the reasons, yes. Another one says that Doomguy was stationed at Phobos because he assaulted his officer when he ordered his unit to open fire on civilians.

    • @cartooncritique6625
      @cartooncritique6625 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@McBadassish Yeah, I had heard about that one as well.

    • @aagh8714
      @aagh8714 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@cartooncritique6625 second game, daisy died at the end of 1

    • @ablosch2452
      @ablosch2452 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Also William Blazkowicz is the name of the main hero of Wolfenstein, another incredibly violent shooter by Id Software (and then Bethesda, but now Microsoft).

  • @NotAGoodUsername360
    @NotAGoodUsername360 4 ปีที่แล้ว +174

    "A heavy metal D&D campaign breaks out in the middle of a sci-fi movie"
    How is it so hard to make an ultra-cheesy action movie on that premise?

  • @jamesturnbull128
    @jamesturnbull128 4 ปีที่แล้ว +22

    "When the comic relief Aussie is the most sensible character you know you've fucked something up" lmao

  • @bander960
    @bander960 4 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    3:08 I personally think having Doomguy/Slayer would be entertaining for a movie, I’m not going to create a 1000 word comment as to why, because I’m not here to waste your time. All I’ll say is it’d be fun to see a silent visceral murderer of demons on the big screen. Just IMO.

  • @jazzburrell8870
    @jazzburrell8870 4 ปีที่แล้ว +298

    I was trying to go my whole life withOUT seeing sonic floss. You just lost a damn subscriber...
    Satire**

    • @dougthedonkey1805
      @dougthedonkey1805 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      You didn’t have to tell us it was satire...

    • @viscountrainbows6452
      @viscountrainbows6452 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      "This new Sonic movie looks like it's gonna break the pattern of shitty video game movies!"
      *remembers Sonic flossing*
      "...well the highest it's getting is an 85 now, assuming everything else is perfect🙀"

    • @jazzburrell8870
      @jazzburrell8870 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @DougtheDonkeyTV just feels like a comment that people would take seriously

    • @viscountrainbows6452
      @viscountrainbows6452 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @TheCondourOutOfSpace Ah sure, I'll forgive him. I blame backpack boi and Fortnite for the contagion😹

    • @reloadpsi
      @reloadpsi 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @TheCondourOutOfSpace It's funny watching all the boomers piss and moan about that.
      And a little sad too.

  • @amspook
    @amspook 4 ปีที่แล้ว +73

    If someone ever wanted to make a Doom movie, it should be about a group of people surviving the doom event itself.
    Forced to fight countless of hellspawn with limited resource and survivor to protect.
    Then when all hope is gone, Doomguy arrives and saves the day. Like that Halo movie where Master Chief arrives and saves a bunch of rookies.
    That should've been a much more interesting movie.

    • @isawadelapradera6490
      @isawadelapradera6490 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      you are proposing a doom movie NOT about doomguy.
      you **** **** ** *****

    • @samwich539
      @samwich539 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      the doom eternal storyline could make at least 3 seasons, with only slayer as the main character

  • @robk79
    @robk79 4 ปีที่แล้ว +86

    Doom Guy would make a great protagonist.
    Dredd did it.
    Oh hey! Karl Urban crossover.

  • @GeraltofRivia22
    @GeraltofRivia22 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    7:07, I'm just gonna point out that the planets are not lined up and have different rates of revolution. So it's entirely possible for Mars to be on the opposite side of the sun from earth.

  • @trtx84
    @trtx84 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    Oh hell I didn't even catch "Joan d'Ark" because my first thought was "Joanna Dark."

  • @gehinkun
    @gehinkun 4 ปีที่แล้ว +124

    Im a propmaker, and Im always amazed with the LACK OF WEATHERING in bad productions. That BFG could have looked decent with some basic chipping and weathering. Hell, I took a chrome pen to a gun prop on a set once to give the edges some scuff and wear and it helped 1000%.

    • @fattiger6957
      @fattiger6957 4 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      That would have required effort and it's pretty clear the copyright squatters who made this movie didn't want to expend any effort.
      But yeah, weathering adds a lot. I briefly was interested in scale model building (dropped that hobby because of how expensive everything was) and just adding some weathering (scorch marks, exhaust burns, dirt trails) really brings a model to life.

    • @BlackNuke145
      @BlackNuke145 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@fattiger6957 copyright sqatters. Good one 👍 Could make a series about that. Fantastic 4, venom etc..

    • @SuperSwordman1
      @SuperSwordman1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Now was the BFG some super prototype in this movie? Cause if so I'd imagine the condition would be close to pristine

    • @extrasalt5303
      @extrasalt5303 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@SuperSwordman1 when you make something out of metal you burn the metal to shape it leaving marks

    • @SuperSwordman1
      @SuperSwordman1 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@extrasalt5303 Ah. Well I never worked with metal or prototypes or anything like that. Not saying this whole movie being clean isn't a problem, just wondered if the BFG being clean isn't at least somewhat understandable.

  • @TheSpawnfan
    @TheSpawnfan 4 ปีที่แล้ว +99

    William Blaszcowicz? screw this movie! They dared to kill the real Doomguy, descendant of Blazscowicz from Wolfenstein

    • @coranbaker6401
      @coranbaker6401 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Wait, Doomguy is the dead dude's descendant?

    • @enricopaolocoronado2511
      @enricopaolocoronado2511 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@coranbaker6401 That's pretty much the general consesus from the Doom fandom. It all started from the Doom RPGs where the surname of the player character is Blazkowicz which is the same name as the main protagonist of the Wolfenstein games William Joseph Blazkowicz.

    • @richtofen9352
      @richtofen9352 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@coranbaker6401 and his dad is commander keen

  • @Mysteri0usChannel
    @Mysteri0usChannel 4 ปีที่แล้ว +105

    Funfact: A fusion reactor would not destroy anything if shut down. In fact, as soon as its hull is damaged or it gets no energy anymore, the plasma cools down to room temperature and that's it.
    The only danger a fusion reactor would pose would either be a leak (however, that would lead to the plasma cooling down immediately and would only be a problem in close proximity and only for a short amount of time), or when you eventually have to remove the worn down heat protection that has become slightly radioactive (about 2 or 3 times as much as a banana) due to being bombarded by the remnants of atoms undergoing nuclear fusion.
    So, yeah...

    • @rozmarinideas5340
      @rozmarinideas5340 4 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      It's almost as if the writers of this movie had no fucking idea what they were on about.

    • @10011110011
      @10011110011 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@rozmarinideas5340 sums up most movies and stories nowdays

    • @alilrevive7972
      @alilrevive7972 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      It’s almost as like they only know as much science as much as they know DOOM, literally nothing.

  • @BalgaBear
    @BalgaBear 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    She could have been so much more Doom Girl if she fulfilled the part.
    She's a psychopath who is a mute, and they send some prisoners into a facility to try and reclaim it, because why not?
    Along the way, it's just raw action for the most part, except for the other prisoners who give the majority of exposition.

  • @nickelakon5369
    @nickelakon5369 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    "Doomguy would be a bad protagonist"
    I don't really see how he would be all that different than Nicolas from GANGSTA (who's deaf) just have Doomguy and Sam Hayden and make sure Doomguy's face is visible like in eternal and make sure the actor is super expressive

  • @carsonburke4727
    @carsonburke4727 4 ปีที่แล้ว +79

    Small problem with the entire movie: that’s just not how fusion reactors would work, they can’t meltdown. If they loose power they just turn off.
    Oh what’s that? We already know the movie is completely broken. Never mind then.

    • @wizardtim8573
      @wizardtim8573 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Was thinking the same thing.
      "What are they worried about? Fusion reactors don't melt down OR explode!"

  • @religiousotaku9926
    @religiousotaku9926 4 ปีที่แล้ว +196

    To be fair, it isn’t Bethesda that’s good but ID software, although they are under them, they work separately and have a waaaaay better development team. Other than that great review now I’m going to replay doom eternal for the 4th time

    • @year111
      @year111 4 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      Also id Software were the original creators of Doom and treat their franchise with care.

    • @religiousotaku9926
      @religiousotaku9926 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      year111 that is true

    • @Largentina.
      @Largentina. 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      @Christopher Simon Imagine thinking Skyrim is Bethesda's best game. Holy. Fucking. Shit.

    • @quicksilverlacey
      @quicksilverlacey 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Largentina. well what do you think is their best? Just wondering

    • @Largentina.
      @Largentina. 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@quicksilverlacey Probably their most ambitious and experimental game Morrowind. But I'm was just joking with my previous comment. Of course you can like whatever you like, it's just kind of odd to say Skyrim in my opinion because of how many things were stripped from previous iterations and how streamlined it became. From what I've noticed it's usually people that haven't played any other Elder Scrolls game that usually think Skyrim is the best, and if that's the case it's totally fine.

  • @xXxFinalSephirothxXx
    @xXxFinalSephirothxXx 4 ปีที่แล้ว +78

    My favorite part of this video is how the censored "beeps" are demon sound effects from the original Doom and Doom II. Nice touch

  • @davidgentry8982
    @davidgentry8982 4 ปีที่แล้ว +26

    "Doom guy would make a horrible movie protagonist"
    Sure fella 👍

  • @nicholasthachuk8660
    @nicholasthachuk8660 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    I found the monster sounds being used for the censoring way too funny

  • @scottpilgrim920
    @scottpilgrim920 4 ปีที่แล้ว +172

    So...the moral of the story is watch Aliens or Event Horizon instead?

    • @Novasky2007
      @Novasky2007 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      Both!

    • @akibop
      @akibop 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Yes

    • @Largentina.
      @Largentina. 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      The moral of the story is to watch both.

    • @RowBlanka
      @RowBlanka 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      or the original doom movie adaptation

    • @Largentina.
      @Largentina. 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@RowBlanka NO

  • @bloodrunsclear
    @bloodrunsclear 4 ปีที่แล้ว +77

    Can nobody WRITE anymore? References aren't an excuse for telling a crap story.

    • @Legendary_Detective-Wobbuffet
      @Legendary_Detective-Wobbuffet 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I don't think they can. They think journalism is fiction.

    • @feralchangeling97
      @feralchangeling97 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      You could make a decent teaser for a (FAKE) Doom movie with the live action trailer for the 2016 game, operatic music turning metal, and select scenes of desperation form the two movies with more focus on footage from the 2016 game's trailer. Story about a group of soldiers trying to release Doomguy before they all die and the halfway point is just Doomguy killing every demon in sight.

    • @fattiger6957
      @fattiger6957 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Plus, friggen Doom doesn't require much story to be good. Doomguy is on Mars when the s**t hits the fan and he kills demons while has to navigate a labyrinthine facility to get to the some place to close the gateway. You don't need a team of soldiers, or a tragic backstory, or a bunch of technobabble.

  • @jappperon7012
    @jappperon7012 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    the literally only thing i can remember being a respectful nod was their explanation for why chainsaws was shipped to a mining facilty, Paperwork screwup, rest of the movie had me hoping someone uploaded a self made bootleg

  • @IzzyPR2010
    @IzzyPR2010 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    "Asian girl finds her lucky underwear, that's a thing?" Actually in manga lucky panties is a thing.

  • @CidCDdrafts
    @CidCDdrafts 4 ปีที่แล้ว +67

    I gotta say, for me, Doom Eternal felt like playing a movie. The best Doom movie ever released.

  • @AcidGlow
    @AcidGlow 4 ปีที่แล้ว +157

    *Dr Betruger??* lol.. that name is from Doom 3 😄

    • @drakkenmensch
      @drakkenmensch 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      That's like pulling inspiration from a movie to create a Friday the 13th game but you pick the first one that doesn't have Jason.

    • @StarkeRealm
      @StarkeRealm 4 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      Also, a lingering joke from 2004, dude's name is literally just German for traitor or betrayer. So, basically, "Dr. Treachery will see you now."

    • @johnw3609
      @johnw3609 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Love your channel

    • @extrasalt5303
      @extrasalt5303 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@drakkenmensch at least the first Friday the 13 movie had Jason's mother as the bad guy. This "movie" just named some random scientist that doesn't even look like Dr.Betruger "DR.BeruGER" as a call back to doom 3.

    • @thesayes6231
      @thesayes6231 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@StarkeRealm Betrüger doesn't mean traitor or betrayer lol. I knew that he'd be a villain, because it'S clear that's what they were going for... but Betrüger means more... 'fraud' or maybe 'cheater'. So all the time I was watching for him to be a traitor, because they were clearly going for that, but secretly I wanted him to be a fraud and not actually a doctor at all, but a janitor who just stole the doctor cloak or something like that.

  • @GuenniKurti
    @GuenniKurti 4 ปีที่แล้ว +137

    "Betrüger" is literally German for traitor. Is that their version of clever foreshadowing?

    • @00vondough00
      @00vondough00 4 ปีที่แล้ว +50

      You can thank Doom 3 for that.

    • @michaelsantamaria3053
      @michaelsantamaria3053 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      You can also thank doom 3 for the rock doom movie and all it dumb plot

    • @Christopher-eq1rn
      @Christopher-eq1rn 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      I mean Vader is German for father

    • @michaelsantamaria3053
      @michaelsantamaria3053 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Christopher-eq1rn yeah but no one really saw that coming even if you knew that as there was no huge hints on the twist aside form that comparing to betruger whom start out the game talking in an obvious ominous voice and intentions.

    • @dodojesus4529
      @dodojesus4529 4 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      @@Christopher-eq1rn Vater is german for father, Vader is Dutch.

  • @joaogomes9405
    @joaogomes9405 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    10:31 you know what's even worse? That exact same scene, almost beat for beat, is in the 2005 Doom movie as well. So they ripped off the scene of them ripping off Event Horizon in Doom 2005. That's like, a square root of a rip-off

  • @speedys.6545
    @speedys.6545 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    I do hope there is a sequel just because watching this movie with friends and laughing at how bad it is was so fun.

  • @animalblundetto5673
    @animalblundetto5673 4 ปีที่แล้ว +43

    Doom 2016’s “Fight Like Hell” cinematic trailer was more of a Doom movie than this.

  • @rebbyra
    @rebbyra 4 ปีที่แล้ว +191

    I would refrain from using the phrase "Shit the bed," as it is now called "Amber Heard the bed"

    • @asher8754
      @asher8754 4 ปีที่แล้ว +32

      That’s insulting to shit.

    • @chrissedaka8141
      @chrissedaka8141 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      Amber Turd

    • @Novasky2007
      @Novasky2007 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Story checks out.

    • @bloodbrawler1438
      @bloodbrawler1438 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      She should be called Ember Heard. Cause she is a BURNING pile of shit

  • @LeuvahkTrigger
    @LeuvahkTrigger 4 ปีที่แล้ว +40

    Even joans backstory was stolen by the way. The OG Doomguy's backstory was the exact same in that he screwed up and was sent to Mars as punishment.
    Right man, right place.

    • @ironnoah9461
      @ironnoah9461 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      But he screwed up deliberately

    • @sorrenblitz805
      @sorrenblitz805 4 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      He assaulted his Commanding officer for ordering his unit to fire on Innocent Unarmed Civilians. He beat the man to death and was stationed on Mars as a punishment.
      It should be noted though that these are Corporate Marines not government military.

    • @nickelakon5369
      @nickelakon5369 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@sorrenblitz805 his officer survived the attack and is implied to be part of the reason why Doomguy recieved such a severe punishment

    • @raindennis5517
      @raindennis5517 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@sorrenblitz805 @Nick Elakon Flynn Taggert.

  • @haze5538
    @haze5538 4 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    You know a movie’s bad when you forget that it came out.

  • @aconcernedcommissar6261
    @aconcernedcommissar6261 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    the idea of a doom movie following regular people doesn't sound to bad in my opinion. but i'd still take the good doom video games any day

  • @thespanishinquisition4078
    @thespanishinquisition4078 4 ปีที่แล้ว +70

    Here's one more drip of incompetence you missed: when the character says he knows there's an emergency entrance because "he read everything about the base" because "he likes to read", yes, that is a narrative convenience as you pointed out. But what makes it extra stupid, is that this is a military team being sent to a hostile environment. Reading everything about the base and knowing where every entry and exit point is should be their fucking job, indeed they should have a briefing room plastered with that shit. Why was there even a need for the only fucking civilian of the bunch to be the one with the intel literally everyone else should know? They should be telling him this, and the only necessary explanation should be "because briefing"

    • @benbanned1381
      @benbanned1381 4 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      It's a militaristic doom movie made by people who don't know doom and don't know the military, so we honestly can't be surprised at how retarded it turned out.

    • @night-seeker666
      @night-seeker666 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      @@benbanned1381 The failure of Doom: Annihilation is similar to the failure of Hitman: Agent 47. The movie is a reboot of a previous videogame adaptation that flopped, the reboot ended up looking like shit. The way they portrayed the protagonist pissed off the fans and it caused people to say the original was ok. The difference is that the director for Hitman: Agent 47 wanted to make their version of Agent 47 accurate to the original character, but was forced to bastardize him, and it seems like they didn't even try being accurate in Doom: Annihilation.

    • @laurab7081
      @laurab7081 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      That's not how it works in the military, they thought they where going to REPLACE a security detail not breach into the facility, it was BS guard detail which is why is was a "punishment". So all the briefings ect would of taken place by the out going unit that was already there. They would do what is called right seat left seat where they first observe the other guys doing their job (right seat) then they do the job while the other team observe and assist if needed (left seat). At this time they would go over that stuff but seeing as they likely didn't expect an invasion as they are on a moon orbiting mars and would be more concerned with inner security that's questionable. What would make much more sense is that they would know about an emergency entrance/exit because it is a space dock and they would be built with those things. You don't need some grand explanation as to how they know something that should be present is present. There is probably even some signs and arrows seeing it is an emergency entrance/exit and those things typically are required to have signs and be lighted so they are easy to find.

  • @fatih9016
    @fatih9016 4 ปีที่แล้ว +60

    10:46 it's "RIP AND TEAR" not "rip off and paste" they certainly got that part wrong

  • @jaytait8192
    @jaytait8192 4 ปีที่แล้ว +83

    “putting a fusion reactor on a moon that unstable is pretty stupid”
    that’s literally the doom lore. people were stupid.

    • @ABonafideSkeleton
      @ABonafideSkeleton 4 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      Yanno what's even _more_ stupid? The idea that fusion reactors are more dangerous than fission reactors.
      If something goes wrong with a fusion reactor the absolute worst thing that would happen is a plasma leak, damaging hardware and possibly killing anyone in close proximity to it.
      And if you switch it off then the reactor will, well, _switch off._

    • @ablosch2452
      @ablosch2452 4 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      In Doom the games, they were more concentrated on Argent Energy reactors than Fusion Reactors. Which in there was the whole reason they went down into Hell itself, to siphon said energy and make it usable in the world of the living in order to solve an energy crisis, despite it also allowing the spawn of Satan to come rushing through the gateway. Which in that I could see the logic behind that.

    • @angrymokyuu1951
      @angrymokyuu1951 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@ablosch2452 Argent energy wasn't a thing until the 2016 reboot. Both the original and the third opened the door to hell via teleportation experiments, with the power source of the base being irrelevant.

    • @ablosch2452
      @ablosch2452 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@angrymokyuu1951 and this movie came out in 2019, after the 2016 game.

  • @TurdFurgeson571
    @TurdFurgeson571 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    "How long do we have before the bad thing happens?"
    "Just long enough to be considered feature length."
    "My god..."

  • @ThePercolatorFish
    @ThePercolatorFish 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Interesting that you thought the protagonist was supposed to be “Joan d’arc”, i personally thought it was a name drop of Joanna Dark from Perfect Dark

  • @Wyattporter
    @Wyattporter 4 ปีที่แล้ว +90

    The issue with making a DOOM movie is that the game does not focus on telling a story. It has one, it has extremely deep lore, but it doesn’t tell it to you, it gives you pages to read. The game is about gameplay, not story. If it were true to the game, it’d be almost boring, just watching the Doom Slayer run around while the characters talk exposition at the audience.

    • @getschwifty5537
      @getschwifty5537 4 ปีที่แล้ว +38

      The only compelling plot I could think of would be to revolve it around the efforts of a resistance group on Earth after a Hell invasion trying to shepherd a group of survivors to safety. Doom Guy is present but as a prolific figure that's off fighting his own battles and is hardly even aware of the regular humans in his shadow. He's the eye candy between the struggles of our regular human protagonist to both survive and get the job done.
      So you have the protagonist be both personally inspired by Doom Guy's willpower, as well as formulate a plan to follow as closely on Doom Guy's heels as possible without drawing too much attention. Cause think of it, the Slayer's missions on Earth in Eternal have him primarily in demon hotzones. Proximity to Doom Slayer is both the worst place you can be as a regular human and the best place. Heavy demon activity but they're all focused on him. He's the one man army taking up all of Hell's attention. So what if some regular soldiers decided to piggyback on that and carry out crucial operations while being indirectly covered by the Slayer's rampage?
      That way you get a compelling human drama, a horror/thriller experience because even if you make the protagonist pretty capable against demons it'll still be like a "one wrong move and you're dead" situation as they very carefully navigate Hellified Earth, and an action spectacle when the protagonists find themselves directly witnessing Doom Guy's demon genocide for a moment while dealing with their own troubles.
      But of course such a movie would need a very competent and inspired director, and a really damn good budget.

    • @Wyattporter
      @Wyattporter 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      David Lopez and I’m sure at least a few people would be disappointed that the Doomguy isn’t the main protagonist. He’s a player insert, not a compelling character. It’d be hard to make a movie that’s true to the game and interesting.

    • @Wyattporter
      @Wyattporter 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      el negro that I highly disagree with

    • @Owl9174
      @Owl9174 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@Wyattporter dude, it's a quote from the actual creator of doom

    • @Wyattporter
      @Wyattporter 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      soLD Is it? I didn’t know. I still heavily disagree

  • @nomad9880
    @nomad9880 4 ปีที่แล้ว +86

    The nine dislikes are from the circles of hell

    • @danpryle313
      @danpryle313 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Its the # of "demons" in the "movie".

  • @MrReaver55
    @MrReaver55 4 ปีที่แล้ว +45

    i kinda feel bad for the director, he had a passion but couldnt do what he wanted since the purpose for this movie being made was just to extend the copyright hold or whatever they call it. Shit was dead way before it even went into production,Poor guy was limited on both fronts such as permissions and budget. Director was a real doom fan too.

    • @loafywolfy
      @loafywolfy 4 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      that makes a lot of sense, reminds me of that awful fantastic 4 movie

    • @fattiger6957
      @fattiger6957 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I got the feeling this was a copyright squatting movie. Like who would take Doom, one of the most iconic video games of all time, and make a no-budget pos direct-to-dvd movie? It's really annoying how these movie licenses just don't expire.

  • @harrissyed1417
    @harrissyed1417 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Doom: Annihilation is everything that represents how not to make a video game movie.

  • @Vindictator1972
    @Vindictator1972 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Doomguy would make a GREAT DOOM protagonist. But you would have to actually make a DOOM movie. Hell he actually gets some dialogue in Eternal as you should know.
    Hell even Hardcore Henry had a great silent protagonist and that was first person the entire time.
    Side note, I attempted to rewatch this failed abortion of a movie, I got 4:20 into it and was like nah fam I’m out.

  • @thebushwhacker8496
    @thebushwhacker8496 4 ปีที่แล้ว +44

    Honestly I would rather watch a movie about doom guy running around blowing demons to pieces with little dialogue than this.

    • @cartooncritique6625
      @cartooncritique6625 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I've literally seen a 20-minute animation here on TH-cam that (in spite of being a parody) is a better adaption of the Doom games than either live-action movie.

    • @jonathanamador5322
      @jonathanamador5322 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Watch hardcore henry

    • @James-pt2vk
      @James-pt2vk 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@cartooncritique6625 dont suppose you have a link? That sounds awesome

  • @The3dCarrot
    @The3dCarrot 4 ปีที่แล้ว +22

    Fusion reactors don't melt down. A fusion reaction is extremely difficult to sustain so if even a single thing goes slightly wrong, the reaction will stop entirely

  • @raymond-reviews
    @raymond-reviews 4 ปีที่แล้ว +131

    We don’t call her Rey Skywalker, we call her Rey Palpatine.

  • @kapislap
    @kapislap ปีที่แล้ว +3

    what is crazy is i felt like the capt looked like the og doom guy in the face and they threw that opportunity away. coulda had the same bloody beat up face etc

  • @BlueLizardKing
    @BlueLizardKing 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Like I've said on other videos: If they wanted to make a Doom movie with a female lead, all they had to do was adapt the Doom3 books by Matthew Costello himself. Maria would have been a fantastic lead.

  • @tomlewis807
    @tomlewis807 4 ปีที่แล้ว +22

    Re: "Is this really the time to talk about this?" As a chaplain myself, deep conversations at incredibly unexpected moments are kind of our party trick.

  • @thedude9913
    @thedude9913 4 ปีที่แล้ว +51

    Yeah man my favorite Doom movie
    Strong feminist woman who loses faith
    Demons called "ancient aliens"
    Scenes stolen from several movies
    Low budget bullshit
    Has nothing to do with original plot
    Btw dat BFG is really dissapointing
    Edit:btw doomguy doesnt have a god so he doesnt have faith so end fight is stupid

    • @kelaEQ2
      @kelaEQ2 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      My understanding is from the Demons perspective doomguy IS god, or at least his chosen warrior.

    • @halempyrion4406
      @halempyrion4406 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@kelaEQ2 more like the demons end. Doomguy is fury. Not any embodiment of mankind or death. He is just wrath.
      Doomguy, it is just one Doomguy, is has killed literally trillions of demons and spent eons in the underworld. He is the closest thing to a deity the demons would have ever encountered.

    • @notajalapeno4442
      @notajalapeno4442 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@kelaEQ2 but he is a god prof in doom eternal

    • @DragonessYT
      @DragonessYT 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@kelaEQ2 to be fair Doom Guy technically has God in his pocket... Cause it's heavily inferred that VEGA is God.

    • @syrienangel4137
      @syrienangel4137 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      But in the lore, he's Catholic...

  • @Fwufikins
    @Fwufikins 4 ปีที่แล้ว +28

    I love that all the bleeps are demon death sounds

  • @JarmamStuff
    @JarmamStuff 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    You could include Doomguy in a similar way to how they did Dredd in the 2012 movie. Have him be... him, and have other characters be the main hero/villain

  • @Shadowpastcool
    @Shadowpastcool 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    As Church from Red vs Blue would say "holy crap, who is running this army?!"

  • @krashandburn
    @krashandburn 4 ปีที่แล้ว +33

    Flaming Poop Mountain is an awesome name for a metal band.
    But seriously, how did they create the most derivative movie of all time..?

  • @ArtyFartyBart
    @ArtyFartyBart 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    The planets aren't all in a neat line on one side of the sun at most times. Mars is often on the other side of the sun from us, so it's not that weird they're flying towards the sun, even though Mars is (in distance) further from the sun than Earth

  • @cloud2018
    @cloud2018 4 ปีที่แล้ว +28

    If anyone truly insists on making a Doom movie, film it in first person like Hardcore Henry. Anyone remember that one? Anyone? Just me then.......

    • @rainbowslushy223
      @rainbowslushy223 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Amazing film

    • @zachscarbrough2727
      @zachscarbrough2727 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      No I remember that movie too. I'm more surprised that more people don't talk about it.

  • @marconotonfacebook3480
    @marconotonfacebook3480 4 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    The Doomgirl actress must have done something right because, just from the clips you showed, she looked way worse than the other actresses. "They couldn't guard a cat-flap"- LOL

  • @therandomartist3201
    @therandomartist3201 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Here’s a doom movie idea, marines who end up in hell (idk I just came up with this idea of how they get there) come across a field of demon corpses, carved, cleaved, impaled, utterly destroyed and ruined. They follow the sound of gun fire and chainsaw and behold the doom slayer in all his glory one man army-ing demons they struggled against all this time in hell. After he’s done he turns and stares at them and they cautiously approach. Thus begins a journey of these marines following the doom slayer so they can get home. You could have plenty of moments of them sitting down to restock and doom slayer sitting farther from the party looking like he’s doing maintenance but maybe pull up or pull out something that reminds him of what he has up at home, maybe a ruined photo of his family with a pet rabbit. This was my best suggestion and I bet you it’s more entertaining to think about than both doom movies. Actually the rock is the rock I can’t compete.

  • @RIlianP
    @RIlianP 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    The fusion reactor on the unstable moon is pretty safe if it was conventional reactor it will be another story. Fusion reactors are pretty safe, they are propelled by plasma, the thing is if you disrupt the plasma field the process stops, and there is no risk of meltdown as the plasma is essentially super heated gas to a liquid stream contained by an electromagnetic field, but even a slight temperature change will turn the plasma into gas again and the gas wont explode the process can be maintained under very specific condition, a quote from ITER (an European fusion reactor project) FAQ ion the safety, specifically explosion:
    In a tokamak fusion device, the quantity of fuel present in the vessel at any one time is sufficient for a few-seconds burn only. It is difficult to reach and maintain the precise conditions necessary for fusion; any disruption in these conditions and the plasma cools within seconds and the reaction stops, much in the same way that a gas burner is extinguished when the fuel tap is turned off. The fusion process is inherently safe; there is no danger of run-away reaction or explosion.

  • @chronoflect
    @chronoflect 4 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    7:05 It's actually possible that you would need to go towards the sun to get to Phobos, since Mars could be on the far end of its orbit around the sun relative to Earth.
    Not that the makers of this movie would've considered that. :)

    • @michaelrussell2711
      @michaelrussell2711 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yeah, orbital mechanics are weird. Taking off from Earth you go in the direction of where Mars will be when you get there, at the speed you will average over the time the trip takes. It's fun math, and can have you traveling sunward to 'catch up' with Mars on it's slower, longer orbit.

    • @ChiefSmackahoLLC
      @ChiefSmackahoLLC 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I think cynical reviews actually believes our solar system is laid out neatly like his diagram. He also may have ripped off this "nitpick" from other reviewers who retracted their statements once they were informed about 4th grade science facts.

  • @fireknight4151
    @fireknight4151 4 ปีที่แล้ว +47

    Not even Isabelle would want to watch this movie

    • @taxtapyinc.2921
      @taxtapyinc.2921 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Hate to be that guy but it's Isabelle

    • @NoelistAvenger
      @NoelistAvenger 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Of course she wouldn't : her bro isn't in said movie.

  • @connorgates4221
    @connorgates4221 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    By the gods, they turned daisy the rabbit into an onboard A.I.
    Doomguy: (aggressive shotgun sounds) (angry grunting that sounds like “daaaaaiiiiiiisssssssyyyyyyyy”)

  • @kooneyplayer3154
    @kooneyplayer3154 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    The weird part is doom was originally supposed to be a alien game but the deal fell through so they reskined them to demons. So it’s now gone full circle

  • @prismaticbeetle3194
    @prismaticbeetle3194 4 ปีที่แล้ว +30

    "any amount of time from retirement" = dead character

  • @imjodokast
    @imjodokast 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    On the subject of space travel within our solar system... Yes, Mars may be at the opposite side of the sun from Earth. So it's really just a bad time to launch a ship towards Mars at that time.

  • @jwnj9716
    @jwnj9716 4 ปีที่แล้ว +57

    Gosh this was forgettable and lame. I always liked the Doom 2005, I think its underrated...well not underrated just decent. You had better characters, funny quotes, good soundtrack especially during FPS scene, The Rock, Karl Urban kicking ass and better monster designs from Stan Winston's team. Yeah it has problems, I just wish they followed the game a bit more. Be like Hotel Inferno but with a better budget. The new Doom is a complete waste of time, oh well, what did you expect from the director of Soccer Dog? This one didn't even have a FPS scene....BOOOO!! BOOOO!! And don't add the word Annihilation, it doesn't end well. Just do Hardcore Henry with Doom, that's it. Its not that hard.

    • @asher8754
      @asher8754 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      But then how can they write it off their taxes, and faux virtue signal in order to make it seam like their movie was hated only cause it had a woman and other minorities in it rather than because it was a pile of shit?

    • @eldeano9964
      @eldeano9964 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I agree with everything you said, but to me the fps scene reminded me more of time crisis than doom

    • @Largentina.
      @Largentina. 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      It's not underrated at all. It's appropriately rated. But that doesn't mean that it can't still be entertaining. The movie is trash, no doubt about it. But it's still fun to watch for some people.

  • @comicallylargesheep8350
    @comicallylargesheep8350 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    As I was listening I got a geico ad and still thought it was you talking

  • @blackbomer18T
    @blackbomer18T 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    "let us rip and tear until it is done." My new favorite saying.