If you want a stay at home wife, you have to make stay at home money. 💰#stayathomewife #relationships #relationshipcoach #relationshipadvice #relationshiptips
It’s the still wanting the vacations, SUV’s, streaming services, new devices for all each year (under the two couple income). We literally are happy without any of that garbage worldly junk. So much more important that I am here for my children, being present, and monitor what they ingest in their bodies, eyes, and ears.
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I’m a stay at home wife. My husband is as traditional as it gets and I’m grateful for this every single day. He thanks me and says he’s proud of me for what I do around the home and how present I am for our children. I thanked HIM for making all of that possible.
You’re not a stay at home wife, you’re a stay at home MOM. Huge difference there! Moms are CONSTANTLY cleaning messes, always cooking breakfast lunch and dinner, doing all the routine housework like laundry & dishes, changing diapers/potty training, being a teacher for their kids, etc etc. Stay at home wives are (almost always) just lazy women who want to sit on their butt all day. It doesn’t take all day to do laundry, dishes, and cooking for 2 adults. Sorry, I don’t mean to sound rude. You’re just not giving yourself the credit u deserve!
@@kayleigh3648 I’m a wife too though. You’re being really shitty towards women you don’t even know. I was a stay at home wife before I became a mom. I was never the type of woman you’re talking about! Maybe you need better friends? I don’t want any credit for doing normal things that every parent should be doing. I don’t need a medal or recognition for that.
@@kayleigh3648 I’m a wife too. And I was a stay at home wife before being a stay at home mom. So I don’t appreciate your little assumption that we’re lazy just because no kids are in the mix yet. Now that I AM a mom, I don’t need the type of recognition you’re talking about just for doing _normal_ things that every parent should be doing. I don’t care about that.
Happy for you, but this only works with an honest decent human being .. many women have had a sweet life like this for a long time and when they weren’t happy anymore, maybe they had hopes and dreams, and are not supported, they don’t know where the money is, whose name it’s in nothing.. if he creates an account, besides joint account, for you that he regularly puts money into(like an allowance), just for you for your personal expenses (not household) and needs no questions asked, THEN ur talking.. anything else is a fantasy.. cuz too many women realize they are in a gilded prison if their husband does something horrible and they have no kind of financial independence.. they stay because they have no choice.. where is the dignity? These kinds of relationships seem great when things are great.. if the unforeseen happens the woman usually finds out some things
@@kayleigh3648shut you down. That’s why she’s a loved wife and you’re still arguing with every guy you meet about what you will and won’t do. We all know how that ends up… 👵🏻🍷🐈🐈⬛
She is correct. If you can’t afford a stay at home wife. Then you either need to make more money. Or pitch in with all the duties at the home and children. You can’t sit on you ass and play games and watch tv if the kitchen isn’t clean or the baby diapers need to be changed when you don’t have the money to have a stay at home wife. Better pitch in.
Waking up at 10 to clean the kitchen then lounge by a pool is not a stay at home wife. It's a parasite. Maids clean the whole house in a few hours. Cooks wakeup ours before the household to prepare the food. A stay at home wife's duties end when her eyes close for the night, unless she has little ones. Yes, the dynamic changes when she's leaving the household to pursue recourses. A man may pickup additional duties besides the home maintenance his wife couldn't do. Coming home from welding for 11 hours to do the laundry and clean the kitchen or pickup after your woman isn't so bad when you're on double income. So long as you're not pouring all of that additional income into the rent or mortgage, adding meal preparation isn't an undue burden.
@@nathanielcowan3971 Maids get paid to clean the whole house and chefs get paid to cook meals and they don't do it 24/7. A SAHW has to do both and more with the risk of being financially abused. So no, she is not a parasite. She is saving YOU more than $500/day so you don't have to hire a maid and private chef. Since she's not getting paid, she gets to make up her own schedule as long as she gets her unpaid job done.
Last year I went on a date with a guy telling me "I want you to move in with me, I expect you to cook, clean, wash and iron my clothes and pay the bills while also working full time". I never laughed any harder in my life. The audacity! 🤣 Bare in mind, this guy was getting a high monthly wage compared to mine, he wasn't broke.
Let me guess- he also wanted u to go to the gym to keep your body fit and do ur hair & makeup every single day. I mean, clearly you’d have the time for it right? 😝 I’ve been seeing a lot of men lately who really do expect these things, and it’s so bizarre..
One of my exes was like "can't wait for you to get a job so we can get married and move in together and I'll come home from work and find you in the kitchen making dinner." I was like "you know I'm an architect, right? Well that means if I get a job I'll literally never get home earlier than you, I'm afraid you'll have to make your own dinner" He started and stuttered 😂
Real SAH moms/wives will know that you still have to wake up at the crack of dawn and it’s not just “cleaning the kitchen,” but dealing with every single aspect of home care and child care, whether you feel it that day or not. The reason it’s more economical for the wife to stay at home is because delegating those tasks out to actual workers would result in a massive expense (hundreds of thousands) ✌🏼🕊️
I work outside and inside the home and the home is way more demanding. I don't know why she thinks she is going to lounge by the pool. I have a pool and it's been like 8 years since I have "lounged by the pool" 😂
The husbands also needs to appreciate this. Else Nxt gen will not want to do it. That's what's happening in my country. Most Husbands typically ask what work do you have at home if they are tired or say they didn't have time . They belittle sahm coz they don't contribute monetarily to home...( not income necessarily but dowry too) There are very few decent men.
She never said stay at home mom, she said stay at home wife. She's also a millionaire. Just because this is your life, doesn't mean it's hers. It sounds like she really doesn't want YOUR life. 😂
It depends on what afford it means to some women. Making 60-70k in the backwoods is easily attainable. Making 60-70k in la nyc Chicago atl not so much. Pick a choose a good woman that wants to be with you for you not what you have. And you will both be happy with your roles.
@@tmccloudjr13but for those looking for their wife to be at traditional spouse, if his income is not enough to cover the living expenses and she has to also contribute financially then he can’t expect her to do all the work at home and he has to contribute to the chores, we are speaking about traditional expectations some have of their partners without considering the responsibility they also have in order to get what they want (it applies to any relationship but they are especially referring to “typical traditional heterosexual relationships”)
@@tmccloudjr13if you want me to act as a maid for the rest of my life then you better provide 110% of what i need, im not becoming a slave for the bare minimum bc i might as well be single and find a job
"Don't ask me for anything you're not willing to do." It also applies to the question "which one of us will stay at home taking care of our house and family": if you think you're too good for the job or have better dreams to follow, don't expect your wife to think differently.
The problem I’m seeing these days is that (some) men want both: a woman who works and contributes to bills, but also does a majority of the housework/childcare. It’s an improbable formula.
Then they find one and won't date her cuz she's not a 10 lol. I'm semi retired and would love to contribute and do the housework. But it's crickets out there lol. They're chasing the younger, thinner chicks with 5lbs of makeup and fake everything.
@@jackdar1iipper heres two examples: One of my friends was living on her husbands income and they don't even have kids. As soon as he got home from work i kid you not she started bullying him to make gourmet dog food for her dogs. In another case one of my close friends was working full time with a long commute and almost always had all 3 kids with him even tho his wife stayed at home. One a new baby, one 2 yrs and one 8 yrs old. Thank god eventually they began to even out. Where I'm from it's pretty common to hear women expect men to work full time AND do extra housework even though the woman is doing a lot less of the workload. The women also seem to think that is a fair balance. The whole thing seems warped, blind and entitled. I've not met men who are like this personally but i hear about it online and i won't assume it's not true just because of my own experiences. If we put all the examples and complaints together and look at context, there's too much extra bullshit work and jobs expect too many hours from people. 30 hrs should be full time, and people really desperately need community shared activities & resources so they don't have a bunch of excessive bullshit to manage. Anyway thanks for replying, i hope this gives you something helpful to think about.
@@nuggs9999 no. Lots of first dates. Occasionally a second. Once they realized I wouldn't sleep with them without a ring they split. Had one boyfriend when I was 22, but he left me.
To an extent. She’s not leaving room for growth in the relationship. She is the type to be dominant role in a relationship so the man and her husband presumably is stay at home while she works for bread. That’s fine if it works for them but it’s rare. I say husband because I think she’s married. I could be wrong.
@anonymousdogg1559 ... No. Not 'to an extent'. She's absolutely right. What kind of growth is she leaving out? Is growth in a relationship when a woman does the whole list and a man does nothing? Or her 75% and he 25%? I think you are either single and looking for the do everything for you person or you are in a relationship and you use the term 'growth' as an equivalent to 'it's my way or the highway.
@@anonymousdogg1559you literally didn’t watch the video. If you want a woman to do traditional woman things you gotta do traditional man things. I’ll cook and clean as long as you’re working to provide for me. Why should I work 40+ hours with you and then still cook and clean?
Thank goodness you brought this up! Truly, investing has changed my perspective on how one can succeed in life; working multiple jobs isn't the optimal way to attain financial freedom and unfortunately, we discover this later in life. Currently earn as much as 10 grand weekly and this has improved my financial life. Great piece!
I have been a traditional wife for over 14 years. I do pretty much all of the housework, and have nothing to complain about, because my husband provides for me! You're so right- if i was working outside the home, i definitely would not also do the same job i do at home- i would expect much help! 🔥🔥🔥
Seriously. My exhusband was so lazy. Wouldnt lift a finger. Judge everything i did. Said i sucked at being a homemaker. I worked more hours than him and had to keep up with kids and the house. It's such a breath of fresh air living on my own with my kids. My house is always spotless and i cook every day. I have so much more zest for life after i got rid of my parasite of a spouse.
@@SaturatedCat dumb answer, because obviously that's not what she's talking about. In your example, is not that he doesn't want to do it, rather that HE CAN'T. He's not pushing things over her just because he feels superior or whatever.
I love that she doesn’t say don’t ask me to do that if I’m working. She says don’t ask me to do anything you won’t do because you’re working. That’s equality.
I'm a stay at home wife and it's NOT just cleaning for 30 minutes and then sleeping all day. It's a full time job. Meal planning/preparation, budgeting, appointments, child/pet care, anything unexpected that comes up is on you to handle it, in addition to the domestic side of things. Its 100% taking care of your husband just as much as he takes care of you, except you never get to clock out.
yes! i get the impression she is not "SAHW/M" material--she thinks it's waking up at 10 and cleaning the kitchen, then lounging by the pool. 🤣😂🤣 i think she's better suited to having a career and hiring someone to do the work at home. she just might want to stick to fur babies as well, as real ones tend to get in the way of all that lounging.
@GojosBackHand it would largely depend on how many kids you have, what kind of health you and your partner are in and what geographic location considering traffic, etc. It's actually so much work that women are just opting to get a job instead because at least you can clock out and go get your nails done. 💅
In my country, there’s a crisis where many men are demanding a “traditional housewife” that stays home, cooks, cleans and takes care of their future dozen children, but these men are working minimum wage jobs… Not that it’s bad to work in a minimum wage, but staying and taking care of a home and family does require a lot of money.
@@darlingdeb7010no, it does require money. We are assuming at least a couple of kids are involved. One source of income with a minimum wage job and 2 kids is literally poverty.
@@darlingdeb7010 nope even if you strictly budget there's a chance of debt on one person just earning.. There's articles about it that you cannot have a "traditional lifestyle" on average persons money
Honestly this is all she needed to say. This should be added to the golden rule. Treat people how you want to be treated and don’t ask anyone for anything that you’re not willing to do or learn.
Best quote on this subject. And it also applies to the question "which one of is will stay at home taking care of our house and family": if you think you're too good for the job or have better dreams to follow, don't expect your wife to think differently.
So, tell me. Should the man also say the same thing about things broken in the home, from not so difficult to difficult, whatever they may be, that needs fixing?
@@devilmaycry9969 When we both pay 50/50 lets share chores in everything, taking out the trash, doing gardening, fixing broken stuff, cleaning dishes, cleaning the house, cooking dinner, taking kids to bed and helping them with home work. I think it's fair
FOR REAL. I went on a few dates with a guy, he was talking about how he wants a traditional family, for a woman who wants to take care of kids and the house, and i was fully on board. Then he said that he wants me to have a job as well so i can help pay the bills. I said basically what she said in this video and he called me a GOLD DIGGER 😂😂😂
Lmao, he doesn't want a wife but a maid. My ex boyfriend was like this, needless to say I broke up 😂. Like, dude, either earn enough so I can be a stay at home mom or do the chores 😂
My BIL is just as useless. Him and my sis just had their second child, and he told off the 5 months old baby for crying because he was hungry!!!! That baby is the best behaved baby I've seen in my whole life, and I've worked in childcare for 20+ years. Meanwhile, the dad doesn't do ANYTHING around the house
It's not actually a hot take, it's just that men can't get with the program. You can't go 50-50 on bills (as in everyone pitch in 50% of their income) and expect a 90-10 in household and childcare on the women.
@@benjaminjones3099What dead weight? Lmfao, did you forget that for most of history women were oppressed? Guess someone slept off through history class and now shows ignorance.
My mom worked part time, my Dad full time. My Dad never had to cook a single meal once in their marriage, breakfast made, lunch packed, dinner ready for him when he got home. Never once had to do laundry or clean, dishes were promptly cleaned after eating, house vacuumed and mopped every other day, absolutely spotless home with kids, husband and dogs. My dad treated my mom like absolute crap, would insult her all the time, if one thing was off with his food he wouldn’t let it go. I used to literally risk my life to tell my Dad he was a lazy asshole and guess what, my mom would defend him and tell me to stop. Never met a more loyal woman than my Mom, still enrages me sometimes.
@@WhoamiiiiiiiiiiiiYour happiness is important. it’s not “ruining your life” if you’re leaving a man who’s downright abusive like that-in fact, it will only improve your quality of life. It’s very obvious to children when they grow up that their parents are in an unhappy marriage, and one day, when they’re older, they will understand your decision to divorce if they truly love you. Parents who choose to be together for the sake of the children more often than not form a very dysfunctional family, which will only cause problems for your children later down the line rather than two parents who are divorced but co-parent healthily.
@brooke.- you're saving your kids lives not ruining them. they will thank you. I begged my parents to get divorced when I was 11 years old because of how horrible they acted.
Mmm being SAHW is not sleeping till 10 and lounging at the pool...sure we have perks of free time sometimes. But I get up with or before my hubby I make his coffee and breakfast, I do all the house cleaning, all the grocery shopping, balance the finances, homeschool my kiddos, take my kiddos everywhere. My husband recognizes I usually work and am busy more hours than him.
I've had the fortune of being a wife in both spaces snd she is correct. When I worked in my corporate job, my husband and I worked together to maintain our household and take care of our children. Then, once I started staying home with the kids, the chores and child-rearing fell more on me amd my husband worked more, but still helped out whenever he could. I have some friends that do 100 % of both, working and taking care of a household and its heart breaking. It actually makes my husband so mad. He's always saying that men that make their wives do that don't love their wife, because how can you watch her do so much and just sit there selfishly. He believe men like that don't take care of their wife and they are not serving their family. It makes him so mad.
My husband works hard to provide financially while I'm a SAHM to 2 kids on the autism spectrum, oldest also has a lot of medical issues. I homeschool them as well as we don't have local schools that can accommodate our kids. He can come home from a 12 hours shift + commute and will jump right in to help with cooking, doing the dishes, helping our youngest with the shower (sensory issues with water), sweeping the floor, etc. Whenever I protest and tell him you just had a long day at work, please sit and relax, his response is always yeah, and how long was YOUR day? He's the one that constantly tells me, I get to clock out, you don't, it's only fair I do my part when I get home.
If I was working so that my wife could stay at home I would be sad. I would probably be working so hard to cover all the expenses that I wouldn’t see the family as much. So, IDK. Work 12+hour days (not counting commute) and have an immaculate house that I mostly sleep in? A wife and kids that I see infrequently? And the risk of growing apart because I don’t spend enough time with her. Wages haven’t kept pace with inflation for over 30 years. One income is not enough for most households even in lower cost areas. I can’t picture a “traditional” wife because I didn’t have traditional parents. Both worked outside the house. Both worked together to take care of the household and my brother and me. Many communities of color didn’t have the luxury of traditional roles. My dad always helped around the house but he also did all the yard work, home repairs, car maintenance and killed copperheads when he had to work in the crawl space under the house. It is foreign to me that a grown woman would need to lecture grown ass men about doing their share of housework. I was always taught that it’s just stuff you have to do. It’s not a man’s job or a woman’s job. It’s a job. I think not enough people have seen how this can work. If my wife cooks, I do the dishes. We either talk then or she catches up on NPR or social media. I hate looking at dirty dishes. Probably from my single days. It was my kitchen in my apartment. Keep that shit clean. so if I cook I still do the dishes. But she is doing 4-5 dinners a week to my 2-3. So I see it as a wash (no pun intended). My wife tries to stop me. But I tell her, “baby, if a man is doing the dishes….you let him work.”
Very true..i got my degree and worked in corporate and hated it lol.. so now im a stay at home mom taking my son to toddler story hour and handling the appointments and house care (he handles the finances and i have the ability to make some money on the side selling little baked goods until the kids are in school and i go back to the workforce) but the key is to find that type of man who takes pride in being a man but also isn't threatened if you're working and making money too.. in other words a normal dude with shared values, not some weirdo "alpha male lone wolf leader of the pack" dude.
I bet you're also budgeting to fit into the life style and not complaining and demanding to go out to clubs and restaurants and concerts all the time too. (Well I hope you're not) If you are frugal then I'd argue you're more rare as your husband. Most urbanized women want it all. A city life style with kids and restaurants every weekend and spontaneous designer shopping sprees and a nanny to help out with the kids. Fancy SUV, organic groceries, family trips to Hawaii every year, annual Disneyland passes, designer makeup and 10 new pair of shoes, buying any clothes on demand... just because you're a woman and a man should provide all of her wants? The US median household income is $75k per year yet most women want a $200k lifestyle. That's way more of an issue then men expecting some dishes to be put into a dishwasher.
@@IdealConscienceI think the flaw is thinking most women want that. Or realistically expect that. Sure, we all want that, but expecting it is like expecting to win the lottery when you don't even play.
@@jenniferpearce1052 I'm not wrong and you proved it. You say I'm flawed thinking that most women want or expect the absurd high end lifestyle that isn't feasible to the median household income... and then admit that you all (women) want it like that to win the lottery without having to pay. You can't make up the cognitive dissonance in modern women. It's astounding.
As a man, I didn't know until recently that so many men didn't understand this. None of it be a big hassle either. Aye Bae, I got trash, you get laundry, I'll clean the bathroom, you get the kitchen. I got dinner tonight, you cook on Wednesday. If you really not feeling it that day, I'll do it all tbh. You better not rush me, but I got it. Now when I really touch money, the only housework I'm doing is taking out trash. It's a partnership. You scratch my back, I scratch yours.
If you're both still working demanding jobs then the last part is a hard no. Just because you make more money doesn't mean her job is less work. Now if you make more money and ask her to stay home? Done dealio ❤
Yes! It's the double standard that women don't like. You can't demand that we both contribute 50% financially, but the mental load and home front responsibilities are 90% my responsibility. Times ten if children are involved. Making me a married single mother is some form of abuse. My husband wanted me to always be juggling. Everything was so hard and it was somehow always my fault. I've left him and only now can I see how bad it was. Everything is good without him. Better than good. Everything is easy and the standard tone of our home is laughter. I'm not struggling. People look down on single moms, but it's so much easier to be an effective parent when you don't have a sidekick that undermines you. Leaving him really highlighted how much he was expecting and how little he participated.
@@user-rt5rx4ki2wnah she thinks stay at home mom is just preparing and cooking dinner 1 h work a day. If you are stay at home mum it's full time not a part time hobby. You wake up before husband, make him coffee , breakfast, prepare lunch , prepare his shirts, same with kids, take kids to school and back. While on top of all things that comes up. A lot of women think being a stay home mum is just taking kids to school and back back and spending 7h on tik tok...😂
@@cuzIjustmost men at my workplace are bringing frozen food for lunch . They do their own laundry and wife and children’s laundry. They all have stay at home wives . Many of these men also pick up their children from school in the evenings. I’m am talking about 10-12 men . Don’t know what their wives do at home.
I am a traditional wife who gets up at 6, to take care of our family. My husband never asks me to help pay bills. I don’t ask him to do anything at home. There’s nothing wrong with this. I would never be able to sleep until 10 am. That’s the day half gone.
So, never depend on a man financially. It's still important to have your own career, even if you don't earn much. Never trust men if they say they can provide for u. Sure, they can, but as time goes, either he starts disrespecting u for being a freeloader or want u to start working but think you are not working hard enough
This is EXACTLY how it is, don’t even mention children which is a FULL TIME job, so now SHE has TWO full time jobs, how the hell is even right, why can’t people see this or mention this, thanks you for this general public announcement.
Well. Nice of ya to take care of stuff. Are you paying your half of the bills? If you aren't? Then why should he do half of the stuff around the house. If he pays all the bills. You can handle ALL of the stuff that money buys.
@@504cplol thats not what the video is about. She will be happy to stay home, if the guy comes home with enough money to support both of them. If not and both need to work full time, why should she do all the work around the house when they both pay the bills? And even then, even if he pays ALL the bills, at the end of the day, nobody likes a couch potatoe.
I one hundred percent agree with her. My wife has never had to worry about a bill being paid. She has had complete freedom to do whatever she wants. I don’t ask her to clean the kitchen or do anything except for raise our children. It’s on me to provide for us. That’s the way it supposed to be.
So true. A lot of men want an independent partner but they want to be taken care of in a traditional way like their moms did. I’m almost 50, had 3 long-term relationships and have been single for almost 4.5 years now. Life is much, much better without a man.
Amen! After 5 years of being cornered into working fulltime and doing all the chores (including mowing and garbage), I divorced him. It's been 43 years of bliss! No more brown bed covers, surprise spending I didn't agree to, arguments over housework, public put downs, threats about if I ever gained weight, etc. None! I own 2 small dogs and a cat. They provide the affection I missed those 5 years.
Thank you. Or wait for this. They want 50 50 but I do more. I be wife doing all hone chores. No. We share that too. If I share my $5k income all of in house hold. Honey do all too. I have no issue
This is exactly what I told my hubby before we got married. If I worked we share the home chores. If I’m not working he should expect to come home to a clean house and dinner ready. Now don’t abuse. Don’t leave your clothes and shoes everywhere for me to put away. No sir. He understood.
For those thinking she’s belittling moms, she said stay at home wives not stay at home moms. We all know adding kids to the equation makes things much more challenging. And the point she’s making is that if a woman works outside the home she shouldn’t be doing more work inside the home than her husband does.
It seems she is belittling men and making a traditional husband something it actually isn't. She is essentially saying that if a man wants her to clean the kitchen, she should have an easy life...because he should be making the money to afford her that. Man working means financial needs, not wants, are met. Wife in the Home means domestic needs, not wants, are met. This is the baseline.
She says you cannot have stay at home wifey privileges if men don't make stay at home wifey money--then proceeds to say she should be able to wake up at 10, clean the kitchen and then lay out by the pool till evening. She is making a trad wife something i5 isn't. And most depictions of trad wifey stuff isn't accurate either by those who claim to be. It is a rebound in the other direction of the absurdity of feminism. Both are extremes and unrealistic.
I wake up at the Crack of dawn as a trad wife. I have a demanding job in the home as a trad wife with 10 kids. There is still a give and take going on. It's not a contractual dynamic like a job is. She is literally treating the husband like an employer and she is laying out her "benefits."
Girls, get yourself a man that does chores out of his own free will, without you asking for it. The kinda man that *knows* he lives there too, and never expected you to do ALL of it to begin with. That man will treat you like a human, not a maid or a mom (probably). Then go figure out whatever deal works best for the two of you✨
THIS!! When my husband and I were dating, I told him straight up that I don't do toilets or dishes, but I'm an amazing cook, and I'll happily do everything else: sweep, mop, laundry, dust, bathtubs and skins, ect 😂. He said I had him at "I'm an amazing cook". He piches in with other things when he's home from work without me saying a thing. A good marriage is a beautiful thing ❤
YES! My husband is a morning person and I like to sleep in. He will make the kids breakfast and start laundry before I get up. All these things are done on a regular basis without me asking or making it an expectation.
Easier said than done. How many women actually stay in unhappy marriages. Men don't change after marriage, they just gradually show u their natural laziness. They never change
My husband and I used to be in the mentality of me still working when we had kids. I cleaned the house while he cooked and did yard work. Now I'm a housewife/sahm who cleans, bakes him fresh sourdough bagels every week and watches our son. I get pampered with the self care I want when I want it because I do the harder part of making this house/family stable. If he wants a happy wife, he makes sure my needs are met because I make sure his are always met.
@@_JustSyd_ then that's just a sad excuse if a man you can't blame her for this if he is too much of a dipshit to not think about a women at home who is willing putting your needs at first making your house a home and you up and leave with any lady you see at work if that kinda men he is does it really matter if she works or not he's gonna do it anyway and the saving part it can happen being a housewife also she can demand money form him for her also he is after all her husband and that gap in resume then there are something one must sacrifice for something I know for some people it's too much but some people likes putting their family first then their Career it's not about being lazy and not going out there labouring about theirs 9 to 5 jobs it's just they like staying at home taking care of their kids and husband their family so what's wrong with it if you gets to choose you want a career then why can't they choose a traditional way of living
@@yoonajungkook6596 That’s not what she saying lol. She’s just advising her to have something of her own financially so that she not screwed if something unexpected ever happens to her man, which does happen a lot by the way.
And that’s on PERIODT! I have been married for 27 years… when I met my husband he cooked,cleaned, worked and was in college… we married and shared the duties including taking care of our children. He is a wonderful father and I really love how loves and sacrifices for them even now that they are adults. He has never changed and I’m blessed to be with him.
@Nithinithinith lol. Females who believed the lie they can do and have everything....pursue this lie to the natural conclusion and then get all mad when their men don't meet them halfway. Men didn't fight to meet their women half way. This was a liberation movement of women. Men didn't liberate themselves. Or maybe I missed that Day in history class.
I'm a woman, there was a few months last year where I was the only one working and paying bills. But my girlfriend was taking care of the house. The best feeling was coming home to a clean house and food being cooked and her making me my coffee. It made me realize how much I wanted to take care of her. And I realized if this is the kind of life I want I have to work hard to be able to provide for her.
I’m a woman with a female partner. This year I’ll get pregnant (for health reasons) then she’s going to stay at home with the kids because financially that makes sense. She’s great at domestic stuff too and she enjoys it more whereas I like working. It’s a great feeling and I’m super grateful to have this in my life. But… I worked hard for it, and none of it came easy.
I was the primary breadwinner, but because I worked fewer days of the week (nurse), he expected me to do the bulk of the housework even though I was paying almost all the bills (he paid his car payment, insurance, student loans and bought some groceries. That's it. Always felt he'd have me paying those too if he could get away with it). He's now his mother's problem lol.
Ideally both are splitting cooking and cleaning or specializing-one outside (car maintenance, yard work, exterior repairs, household repairs) and the other inside (laundry, coking, housecleaning). Better yet, just stay single and each keep your own place and meet up when you want to see each other.
@@djlivvy46 They do. Not only that but if you do not cook dinner or wash the dishes every single day nothing really happens unless you seriously neglect it. If you let your house burn down because of unfixed appliance or your wife get assaulted because you just didn't feel like doing something about it that day it has different consequences. It is always so easy to dismiss things you never worry about until something happens.
Agreed. Wife and I both work outside the home. Our daughter goes to daycare. When we are home, we are both fully engaged with chores, cleaning, taking care of our daughter, etc. We know what each person prefers to do around the house and we have found our sweet spots.
You said what needed to be said. It is time for women not to feel like that HAVE to be a superwoman. We need relaxation, time to de-stress and balance in our life too. Men really out here looking for a mommy for themselves not a wife.
FR. Alot of them will not even scrub those tire tracks and splatters they left; in and on the tiolet bowel. The entitlement for the motherly maid, coined as SAH wife😏
False. Either get up and take kids to school come home and go back to bed, or you're homeschooling and teach them kids to sleep when you do. My kid always slept as long as I did. Never been able to stay home but summers and weekends, weekdays our sleep patterns ate the same
@@AG-nn8lp How can you wake up at 10 if the kids need to leave for school at 8 plus their breakfast and lunch needs to be made for them. Not to mention that SAHMs usually make breakfast and lunch for their husband before work too
Based...and true.. When my wife and I had children..we have 4..she stayed home with the kids..and take em to school and all that.. I make enough money for my wife not to work... She's the best cook... awesome patient mother...house is always immaculate.. She has dinner ready for me.. She's my life..her job is priceless...and she raised well adjusted children...
She's no catch. That stay at home money is to no end. She ain't staying in an studio apartment. The man will likely not want a combative manwomen. He will likely leave. Tom Brady Tom Brady Tom Brady
Yep! When I worked, husband made sure he had his laundry, and our food wasn’t super homemade. Now that I’m home, I do 95% of the laundry and make most of our food homemade. Our work hasn’t always been “even” but it’s always been fair. *Also, there’s always going to be times where each of us has to carry a little more of the load because *life happens,* but when we’re in routine and clicking along, we aim for fair.
Well, I’m a stay at home wife. My husband works. We have 6 children. I homeschool them all and I still need his help. Try teaching, cooking 3 meals a day, planing snacks, organizing a routine, cleaning, planning curriculums for different age groups, field trips/play date, grocery shopping, nursing, sports or extra activities for all children. Honey back in the day that was not a one woman’s show. You had grandparents, aunties and others helping out. I can assure you. A traditional man who only works and a woman staying home with no help…is utterly ridiculous. I’m just realizing I’m stressed and overwhelmed and it’s not worth your sanity, get all the help you can because that’s a 24/7 job and no days off. Not to mention children who have special needs. It’s not easy! But worth it for sure❤
Genuinely all the respect to you. I grew up with strong women role models like you. Their children (and grandchildren) are thriving decades later. Tbh I had always hoped I could do the same, but I never met a partner who was interested in such a life, so 🤷♀️ I live the single, childless life and hope my bro will let me help more with the nephews lol.
Serious props to you! If you want to take on all those things, that’s totally cool; you go girl! But I think this clip is actually agreeing with you! She’s talking about how domestic labor is labor, and it DOES take more than one adult… unless you can pay for relief from duties. I think she’s implying more broadly that “ideal” family life comes with a price tag, and men dreaming about building a beautiful big family like yours (and attracting a woman who wants that) need to be aware of the financial aspect. Random single dudes wanting to provide everything for a family need to pay for help for their future wives. So they can sleep in and not feel frazzled and overwhelmed.
My mom got up before dad to fix breakfast and make lunches 6 am not 10. She was the last out of the kitchen too 8PM. 1 job paid for 4 people! Middle class ain't what it use to be.
Thank you. She clearly doesn't know any stay home wives/moms to say they get up at 10 and lounge by the pool. Honestly pissed me off. My sister is a stay home mom and I have done her full routine several times when she and her husband were out of town or something. She has 5 kids, 2 of them are toddlers 🥲. I was up at 6:30am and not done with everything until 10pm.
Umm what? My parents were traditional married couple. My mom didn’t wake up at 10, did a little cleaning and go “lounge”. She woke up before my dad, got breakfast ready for him and the kids. When everyone leaves for the day, she cooks lunch and dinner (cos Dad comes home to eat lunch), does the laundry, cleans the house. When we come home from school at 3, she does homework with us and feeds us. By the time that’s all done it’s already about 6pm and dad comes home, she prepares and serves dinner and then cleans up. Lol that’s a traditional wife. These females nowadays think being a proper housewife is “lounging” but she’ll demand he make a million dollars a month.
I think we as women just need to be smart about this. By all means, if your husband is making the amount of money that allows you to stay home with the kids and still live comfortably, then do it. But most people, especially if they want to keep a certain standard, will not be able to afford this nowadays. So most of us will have to make compromises and sacrifices in our relationships. Marry someone who understands this and is willing to do his part. Your partner shouldn't be someone that makes your life harder at the end of the day.
@@YeshuaKingMessiah if you love your kids you will do anything to afford them a beautiful life. That should always be your first priority. There is no reasons whatsoever to stay home with older kids who are in school and after school activities, just because of this idea some men have of a stay at home mum, that's just not realistic. Welcome to the real world.
@@YeshuaKingMessiah You think parents who both work don't love their kids? On what planet? Most couples who both work do so out of financial necessity. Also, having children does not mean a parent (usually the mother) must automatically give up her dreams and career goals.
Omg!!! ❤ my boyfriend wants a traditional wife (cook, clean, submissive, feminine etc etc). But he wants to go 50:50 dinner date. I told him today not to come visit me because I don’t feel like cooking for you 10pm at night when he pops in for a “cuddle”. I refuse. Update: He wanted to spend some time together. I told him. I am not cooking. He said he would. He put in some effort for the first time in over a year. Cooked steak, bean salad and a bottle of wine. Was nice. I pulled back. He moved forward. But he can’t help himself tho. He brought back the left over meat the next day. I can feel that he loves me but I believe he is just stingy type of a person.
She said wake up at 10am and clean the kitchen and lounge by the pool while he makes the bacon. That's how marriage works for you? You sure about that?
I work 4 am till midday my wife works 8-5. I get the kids from school prepare and start dinner do a hour housework each day to stay on top and when she comes home we finish cooking together then both have a hour to relax. She does house work on Saturdays while I’m and work and Sunday is family day. Routine is the important part of it.
Make sure you’re getting up in the morning making breakfast taking the kids to school going doing groceries doing the household duties clean cook go do all the errands. Get groceries. Make sure your husband has a hot meal when he gets home and tend to his needs and help the kids with homework while cleaning the rest of the house that’s a housewife got it.
See that’s exactly what I tell some of these men out here. Any reasonable person would understand what she’s saying. Some of these men really hate the idea of doing any housework and they actually work less and get paid less. There’s a lot of useless men that want more than they deserve. I see it in the Philippines a lot and it’s not even necessarily with OFWs. I call some of them cousins.
I agree with the second part. If she’s making half of the money you do half of the chores at home. But stay at home wife is waking up with your husband, get both your breakfast ready, take the kids to school, grocery shopping, clean the house, laundry, pick up the kids, feed them, make them study, take them to sport practice, prepare dinner, etc. There’s no pool involved in the process!
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Saw this great podcast with this Nigerian dude who explained how most of these men don’t want to be traditional men but just want a maid or a mom.
can i have the name of the podcast pls
Yeah; please name podcast!!
Wow 😮
Who was it please?
🎯🎯🎯
What gets me is that people act like this is such a difficult concept to grasp and it's really not
They just refuse to acknowledge it.
Yes I'm here like THIS IS SO OBVIOUS!!! People pretend to be dumb, is all I can think, or they are simply lazy
It’s the still wanting the vacations, SUV’s, streaming services, new devices for all each year (under the two couple income).
We literally are happy without any of that garbage worldly junk. So much more important that I am here for my children, being present, and monitor what they ingest in their bodies, eyes, and ears.
EXAAAAAAAACTLY!❤❤
Bc they want the woman to feel inadequate so she will give in and do it all...then they will call her angry
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I’m a stay at home wife. My husband is as traditional as it gets and I’m grateful for this every single day. He thanks me and says he’s proud of me for what I do around the home and how present I am for our children. I thanked HIM for making all of that possible.
You’re not a stay at home wife, you’re a stay at home MOM. Huge difference there! Moms are CONSTANTLY cleaning messes, always cooking breakfast lunch and dinner, doing all the routine housework like laundry & dishes, changing diapers/potty training, being a teacher for their kids, etc etc. Stay at home wives are (almost always) just lazy women who want to sit on their butt all day. It doesn’t take all day to do laundry, dishes, and cooking for 2 adults.
Sorry, I don’t mean to sound rude. You’re just not giving yourself the credit u deserve!
@@kayleigh3648 I’m a wife too though. You’re being really shitty towards women you don’t even know. I was a stay at home wife before I became a mom. I was never the type of woman you’re talking about! Maybe you need better friends?
I don’t want any credit for doing normal things that every parent should be doing. I don’t need a medal or recognition for that.
@@kayleigh3648 I’m a wife too. And I was a stay at home wife before being a stay at home mom. So I don’t appreciate your little assumption that we’re lazy just because no kids are in the mix yet.
Now that I AM a mom, I don’t need the type of recognition you’re talking about just for doing _normal_ things that every parent should be doing. I don’t care about that.
Happy for you, but this only works with an honest decent human being .. many women have had a sweet life like this for a long time and when they weren’t happy anymore, maybe they had hopes and dreams, and are not supported, they don’t know where the money is, whose name it’s in nothing.. if he creates an account, besides joint account, for you that he regularly puts money into(like an allowance), just for you for your personal expenses (not household) and needs no questions asked, THEN ur talking.. anything else is a fantasy.. cuz too many women realize they are in a gilded prison if their husband does something horrible and they have no kind of financial independence.. they stay because they have no choice.. where is the dignity? These kinds of relationships seem great when things are great.. if the unforeseen happens the woman usually finds out some things
@@kayleigh3648shut you down. That’s why she’s a loved wife and you’re still arguing with every guy you meet about what you will and won’t do. We all know how that ends up… 👵🏻🍷🐈🐈⬛
She is correct. If you can’t afford a stay at home wife. Then you either need to make more money. Or pitch in with all the duties at the home and children. You can’t sit on you ass and play games and watch tv if the kitchen isn’t clean or the baby diapers need to be changed when you don’t have the money to have a stay at home wife. Better pitch in.
Did you even listen??? Stay a home wife not stay at home mom. Typical answer from a woman.
@@NeonForceGetsuga love your answer 👍✌️
Waking up at 10 to clean the kitchen then lounge by a pool is not a stay at home wife. It's a parasite. Maids clean the whole house in a few hours. Cooks wakeup ours before the household to prepare the food. A stay at home wife's duties end when her eyes close for the night, unless she has little ones.
Yes, the dynamic changes when she's leaving the household to pursue recourses. A man may pickup additional duties besides the home maintenance his wife couldn't do. Coming home from welding for 11 hours to do the laundry and clean the kitchen or pickup after your woman isn't so bad when you're on double income. So long as you're not pouring all of that additional income into the rent or mortgage, adding meal preparation isn't an undue burden.
@@nathanielcowan3971 Maids get paid to clean the whole house and chefs get paid to cook meals and they don't do it 24/7. A SAHW has to do both and more with the risk of being financially abused. So no, she is not a parasite. She is saving YOU more than $500/day so you don't have to hire a maid and private chef. Since she's not getting paid, she gets to make up her own schedule as long as she gets her unpaid job done.
I don’t want one not about money but stay at home mom I can work with that
Exactly!! Some men even demand 50/50 on everything except doing housework… seriously?!?
And add to that, taking care of the kids
And add to that, taking care of the kids
And add to that, taking care of the kids
And add to that, taking care of the kids
And add to that, taking care of the kids
Last year I went on a date with a guy telling me "I want you to move in with me, I expect you to cook, clean, wash and iron my clothes and pay the bills while also working full time". I never laughed any harder in my life. The audacity! 🤣
Bare in mind, this guy was getting a high monthly wage compared to mine, he wasn't broke.
he must be insane
Sounds like you threw that garbage where it belings
Let me guess- he also wanted u to go to the gym to keep your body fit and do ur hair & makeup every single day. I mean, clearly you’d have the time for it right? 😝 I’ve been seeing a lot of men lately who really do expect these things, and it’s so bizarre..
One of my exes was like "can't wait for you to get a job so we can get married and move in together and I'll come home from work and find you in the kitchen making dinner."
I was like "you know I'm an architect, right? Well that means if I get a job I'll literally never get home earlier than you, I'm afraid you'll have to make your own dinner"
He started and stuttered 😂
What’s a high monthly wage?
Real SAH moms/wives will know that you still have to wake up at the crack of dawn and it’s not just “cleaning the kitchen,” but dealing with every single aspect of home care and child care, whether you feel it that day or not. The reason it’s more economical for the wife to stay at home is because delegating those tasks out to actual workers would result in a massive expense (hundreds of thousands) ✌🏼🕊️
This!🙌
She said “wake up at 10am and go to the pool.” She has no idea what a wife is.
I work outside and inside the home and the home is way more demanding. I don't know why she thinks she is going to lounge by the pool. I have a pool and it's been like 8 years since I have "lounged by the pool" 😂
The husbands also needs to appreciate this. Else Nxt gen will not want to do it. That's what's happening in my country. Most Husbands typically ask what work do you have at home if they are tired or say they didn't have time . They belittle sahm coz they don't contribute monetarily to home...( not income necessarily but dowry too)
There are very few decent men.
She never said stay at home mom, she said stay at home wife. She's also a millionaire. Just because this is your life, doesn't mean it's hers. It sounds like she really doesn't want YOUR life. 😂
She making a valid point.
Not with that attitude.
@@36handyGood luck with your hand!
@@Bikinigirl05 and yours.
No not realy, this works not if you have some children.
But with the terrible tone. I herd no 50/50 tone in her at all.
Being a tradition wife is a FULL TIME Job. If you can't afford it and need her to pay pills, you need to wash the dishes too.
It depends on what afford it means to some women.
Making 60-70k in the backwoods is easily attainable.
Making 60-70k in la nyc Chicago atl not so much.
Pick a choose a good woman that wants to be with you for you not what you have. And you will both be happy with your roles.
@@tmccloudjr13but for those looking for their wife to be at traditional spouse, if his income is not enough to cover the living expenses and she has to also contribute financially then he can’t expect her to do all the work at home and he has to contribute to the chores, we are speaking about traditional expectations some have of their partners without considering the responsibility they also have in order to get what they want (it applies to any relationship but they are especially referring to “typical traditional heterosexual relationships”)
@@tmccloudjr13 nothing that the original poster said was wrong, everyone needs to do their part
@@nuggs9999 I agree.
But there is a difference in the mentality of the woman is it about the man or the money.
@@tmccloudjr13if you want me to act as a maid for the rest of my life then you better provide 110% of what i need, im not becoming a slave for the bare minimum bc i might as well be single and find a job
"Don't ask me for anything you're not willing to do." It also applies to the question "which one of us will stay at home taking care of our house and family": if you think you're too good for the job or have better dreams to follow, don't expect your wife to think differently.
I keep saying this and I’ll say it again. Be the man she needs you to be so that she can be the woman you want her to be.
Yo that is brilliant!
The problem I’m seeing these days is that (some) men want both: a woman who works and contributes to bills, but also does a majority of the housework/childcare. It’s an improbable formula.
Then they find one and won't date her cuz she's not a 10 lol. I'm semi retired and would love to contribute and do the housework. But it's crickets out there lol. They're chasing the younger, thinner chicks with 5lbs of makeup and fake everything.
This is actually something talked about in psychology. It’s called the “second shift”.
@@jackdar1iipper heres two examples:
One of my friends was living on her husbands income and they don't even have kids. As soon as he got home from work i kid you not she started bullying him to make gourmet dog food for her dogs.
In another case one of my close friends was working full time with a long commute and almost always had all 3 kids with him even tho his wife stayed at home. One a new baby, one 2 yrs and one 8 yrs old. Thank god eventually they began to even out.
Where I'm from it's pretty common to hear women expect men to work full time AND do extra housework even though the woman is doing a lot less of the workload. The women also seem to think that is a fair balance. The whole thing seems warped, blind and entitled. I've not met men who are like this personally but i hear about it online and i won't assume it's not true just because of my own experiences. If we put all the examples and complaints together and look at context, there's too much extra bullshit work and jobs expect too many hours from people. 30 hrs should be full time, and people really desperately need community shared activities & resources so they don't have a bunch of excessive bullshit to manage. Anyway thanks for replying, i hope this gives you something helpful to think about.
@@17h127 well did u spend you younger years messing around?
@@nuggs9999 no. Lots of first dates. Occasionally a second. Once they realized I wouldn't sleep with them without a ring they split. Had one boyfriend when I was 22, but he left me.
That's a VALID point, not a hot take. She is right
To an extent. She’s not leaving room for growth in the relationship. She is the type to be dominant role in a relationship so the man and her husband presumably is stay at home while she works for bread. That’s fine if it works for them but it’s rare. I say husband because I think she’s married. I could be wrong.
@anonymousdogg1559 ... No. Not 'to an extent'. She's absolutely right. What kind of growth is she leaving out? Is growth in a relationship when a woman does the whole list and a man does nothing? Or her 75% and he 25%? I think you are either single and looking for the do everything for you person or you are in a relationship and you use the term 'growth' as an equivalent to 'it's my way or the highway.
She's not, because she still wants to sleep till 10 am, and be a stay at home wife.
@@EJayMD-11if they don’t have kids she can wake up at 10am everything can get done by 5pm
@@anonymousdogg1559you literally didn’t watch the video. If you want a woman to do traditional woman things you gotta do traditional man things. I’ll cook and clean as long as you’re working to provide for me. Why should I work 40+ hours with you and then still cook and clean?
Thank goodness you brought this up! Truly, investing has changed my perspective on how one can succeed in life; working multiple jobs isn't the optimal way to attain financial freedom and unfortunately, we discover this later in life. Currently earn as much as 10 grand weekly and this has improved my financial life. Great piece!
She's OLIVIA SULLIVAN FINANCIALS
Your right, people make money even when the market is down. I started investing recently and realised there's a secret to constant wins .
I have been a traditional wife for over 14 years. I do pretty much all of the housework, and have nothing to complain about, because my husband provides for me! You're so right- if i was working outside the home, i definitely would not also do the same job i do at home- i would expect much help! 🔥🔥🔥
Seriously. My exhusband was so lazy. Wouldnt lift a finger. Judge everything i did. Said i sucked at being a homemaker. I worked more hours than him and had to keep up with kids and the house. It's such a breath of fresh air living on my own with my kids. My house is always spotless and i cook every day. I have so much more zest for life after i got rid of my parasite of a spouse.
Why did you marry him?
@@nicford1486everything is hidden until you exit out of the honey moon zone and hit the comfort zone
I'm happy for you!
@@nicford1486was probably a better person before marriage. Toxic people take their mask off when they know you won’t leave
@mohnishramdonee3352people are not stone. They can and will change 😅😅😅
Don't ask me for anything that you are not willing to do. 😂 Brilliant. 😂
@@SaturatedCat dumb answer, because obviously that's not what she's talking about.
In your example, is not that he doesn't want to do it, rather that HE CAN'T. He's not pushing things over her just because he feels superior or whatever.
Yup. Protect and lift your own heavy stuff ladies
@@504cpif we can’t lift it by ourselves then we’ll ask for help.
@@504cp I love that you directed this towards women even though the topic is directed towards men. Salty much?
@@amy_ambrosio that's weaponized incompetence
I love that she doesn’t say don’t ask me to do that if I’m working. She says don’t ask me to do anything you won’t do because you’re working. That’s equality.
It isn't, you may want to reevaluate what you believe you know.
@@edwinontiveros8701 maybe you should reevaluate your definition of equality.
I'm certain my definition is aligned with reality, logic and basic mathematics and statistics, not with subjectivity, gender and female privilege.
I'm a stay at home wife and it's NOT just cleaning for 30 minutes and then sleeping all day. It's a full time job.
Meal planning/preparation, budgeting, appointments, child/pet care, anything unexpected that comes up is on you to handle it, in addition to the domestic side of things.
Its 100% taking care of your husband just as much as he takes care of you, except you never get to clock out.
yes! i get the impression she is not "SAHW/M" material--she thinks it's waking up at 10 and cleaning the kitchen, then lounging by the pool. 🤣😂🤣
i think she's better suited to having a career and hiring someone to do the work at home.
she just might want to stick to fur babies as well, as real ones tend to get in the way of all that lounging.
She is a millionaire, so she probably already outsources some of those things. Just because it's not your life doesn't mean it's not hers.
@@thereallesliec5232haha, way to make it snarky. We ARE talking about trad wives here.
All of this can be done in 4 hours max😂
@GojosBackHand it would largely depend on how many kids you have, what kind of health you and your partner are in and what geographic location considering traffic, etc. It's actually so much work that women are just opting to get a job instead because at least you can clock out and go get your nails done. 💅
In my country, there’s a crisis where many men are demanding a “traditional housewife” that stays home, cooks, cleans and takes care of their future dozen children, but these men are working minimum wage jobs…
Not that it’s bad to work in a minimum wage, but staying and taking care of a home and family does require a lot of money.
Doesn't necessarily require a lot of money, but it does require a strict budget.
@@darlingdeb7010no, it does require money. We are assuming at least a couple of kids are involved. One source of income with a minimum wage job and 2 kids is literally poverty.
I said A LOT of money. I didn't say free
@@darlingdeb7010 nope even if you strictly budget there's a chance of debt on one person just earning.. There's articles about it that you cannot have a "traditional lifestyle" on average persons money
@thesevenkingswelove9554 wow. My husband and I are quite the anomaly then 😂
"Don't ask me for anything you're not willing to do" 👍
Honestly this is all she needed to say. This should be added to the golden rule. Treat people how you want to be treated and don’t ask anyone for anything that you’re not willing to do or learn.
Best quote on this subject. And it also applies to the question "which one of is will stay at home taking care of our house and family": if you think you're too good for the job or have better dreams to follow, don't expect your wife to think differently.
She can go to work and have him stay home and talk care of the house and kids.
So, tell me. Should the man also say the same thing about things broken in the home, from not so difficult to difficult, whatever they may be, that needs fixing?
She meant that
She is 1000% correct!
Facts. Ladies do not become anyone’s maid or door mat.
Taking care of her home is being a maid?
@@isoboy1000 well acting like his maid and paying 50/50 anyway certainly is
@@isoboy1000 If it involves her paying 50% of the bills yes. What exactly is a woman gaining here?
@@devilmaycry9969 When we both pay 50/50 lets share chores in everything, taking out the trash, doing gardening, fixing broken stuff, cleaning dishes, cleaning the house, cooking dinner, taking kids to bed and helping them with home work.
I think it's fair
FOR REAL. I went on a few dates with a guy, he was talking about how he wants a traditional family, for a woman who wants to take care of kids and the house, and i was fully on board. Then he said that he wants me to have a job as well so i can help pay the bills. I said basically what she said in this video and he called me a GOLD DIGGER 😂😂😂
Sounds like he needs to grow up lmao
Lmao, he doesn't want a wife but a maid.
My ex boyfriend was like this, needless to say I broke up 😂.
Like, dude, either earn enough so I can be a stay at home mom or do the chores 😂
Doesn’t he understand he is being a gold digger for your labour? That has value. How demeaning!
@@sparkyblue7016No because a maid you pay for. He didn’t even want to pay her-he wanted her to pay him! 😅
Only fools dig for gold where there is none 😂
That’s why my sister gave her fiancé the ring back. He just didn’t even take the trash out and she had to do everything plus her 9 to 5 job.
And good for her too! That foresight will save her a lot of trouble
Wow. Brave. Smart women. Right from the beginning of the telationship
Smart woman
@@bonnie1303foresight ? How 😂
My BIL is just as useless. Him and my sis just had their second child, and he told off the 5 months old baby for crying because he was hungry!!!! That baby is the best behaved baby I've seen in my whole life, and I've worked in childcare for 20+ years. Meanwhile, the dad doesn't do ANYTHING around the house
I agree you got to earn the privilege to have a girlfriend/ wife 💯
"Don't ask me for anything that you are not willing to do" Amen sis! Amen!! 😂
It's not actually a hot take, it's just that men can't get with the program. You can't go 50-50 on bills (as in everyone pitch in 50% of their income) and expect a 90-10 in household and childcare on the women.
Have you seen the economy? Who can afford it anymore
@@condor237my husband and I manage on one income.
@@condor237 not being able to afford 50-50? I guess than 100-100. 🤷🏻♀️
Sounds like women finally pulling their dead weight
@@benjaminjones3099What dead weight?
Lmfao, did you forget that for most of history women were oppressed?
Guess someone slept off through history class and now shows ignorance.
Valid and truthful. If you need both incomes to live, then you need both working on the home front too. 😂
facts
She's spot on.
My hubby and I had this talk Vivian is talking about. The minute we were married. And we’ve worked together in our home ever since.
My mom worked part time, my Dad full time. My Dad never had to cook a single meal once in their marriage, breakfast made, lunch packed, dinner ready for him when he got home. Never once had to do laundry or clean, dishes were promptly cleaned after eating, house vacuumed and mopped every other day, absolutely spotless home with kids, husband and dogs. My dad treated my mom like absolute crap, would insult her all the time, if one thing was off with his food he wouldn’t let it go. I used to literally risk my life to tell my Dad he was a lazy asshole and guess what, my mom would defend him and tell me to stop. Never met a more loyal woman than my Mom, still enrages me sometimes.
Stockholm syndrome.
@@WhoamiiiiiiiiiiiiYour happiness is important. it’s not “ruining your life” if you’re leaving a man who’s downright abusive like that-in fact, it will only improve your quality of life. It’s very obvious to children when they grow up that their parents are in an unhappy marriage, and one day, when they’re older, they will understand your decision to divorce if they truly love you. Parents who choose to be together for the sake of the children more often than not form a very dysfunctional family, which will only cause problems for your children later down the line rather than two parents who are divorced but co-parent healthily.
@brooke.- you're saving your kids lives not ruining them. they will thank you. I begged my parents to get divorced when I was 11 years old because of how horrible they acted.
@@pinkpugginz seems impossible to divorce in today’s economy I don’t see how I could make it on my own let alone support my kids on my own
Mmm being SAHW is not sleeping till 10 and lounging at the pool...sure we have perks of free time sometimes. But I get up with or before my hubby I make his coffee and breakfast, I do all the house cleaning, all the grocery shopping, balance the finances, homeschool my kiddos, take my kiddos everywhere. My husband recognizes I usually work and am busy more hours than him.
I've had the fortune of being a wife in both spaces snd she is correct. When I worked in my corporate job, my husband and I worked together to maintain our household and take care of our children. Then, once I started staying home with the kids, the chores and child-rearing fell more on me amd my husband worked more, but still helped out whenever he could.
I have some friends that do 100 % of both, working and taking care of a household and its heart breaking. It actually makes my husband so mad. He's always saying that men that make their wives do that don't love their wife, because how can you watch her do so much and just sit there selfishly. He believe men like that don't take care of their wife and they are not serving their family. It makes him so mad.
Props to your husband and whoever raised him
Stay at home wife, not Stay at home mom listen better, Big difference
My husband works hard to provide financially while I'm a SAHM to 2 kids on the autism spectrum, oldest also has a lot of medical issues. I homeschool them as well as we don't have local schools that can accommodate our kids.
He can come home from a 12 hours shift + commute and will jump right in to help with cooking, doing the dishes, helping our youngest with the shower (sensory issues with water), sweeping the floor, etc. Whenever I protest and tell him you just had a long day at work, please sit and relax, his response is always yeah, and how long was YOUR day? He's the one that constantly tells me, I get to clock out, you don't, it's only fair I do my part when I get home.
If I was working so that my wife could stay at home I would be sad. I would probably be working so hard to cover all the expenses that I wouldn’t see the family as much. So, IDK. Work 12+hour days (not counting commute) and have an immaculate house that I mostly sleep in? A wife and kids that I see infrequently? And the risk of growing apart because I don’t spend enough time with her. Wages haven’t kept pace with inflation for over 30 years. One income is not enough for most households even in lower cost areas. I can’t picture a “traditional” wife because I didn’t have traditional parents. Both worked outside the house. Both worked together to take care of the household and my brother and me. Many communities of color didn’t have the luxury of traditional roles. My dad always helped around the house but he also did all the yard work, home repairs, car maintenance and killed copperheads when he had to work in the crawl space under the house. It is foreign to me that a grown woman would need to lecture grown ass men about doing their share of housework. I was always taught that it’s just stuff you have to do. It’s not a man’s job or a woman’s job. It’s a job. I think not enough people have seen how this can work. If my wife cooks, I do the dishes. We either talk then or she catches up on NPR or social media. I hate looking at dirty dishes. Probably from my single days. It was my kitchen in my apartment. Keep that shit clean. so if I cook I still do the dishes. But she is doing 4-5 dinners a week to my 2-3. So I see it as a wash (no pun intended). My wife tries to stop me. But I tell her, “baby, if a man is doing the dishes….you let him work.”
Wake up at ten and lounge by the pool. Funniest thing I've heard all day 🙄😂
I'm glad SHE said it.
Exactly 😂💖
Very true..i got my degree and worked in corporate and hated it lol.. so now im a stay at home mom taking my son to toddler story hour and handling the appointments and house care (he handles the finances and i have the ability to make some money on the side selling little baked goods until the kids are in school and i go back to the workforce) but the key is to find that type of man who takes pride in being a man but also isn't threatened if you're working and making money too.. in other words a normal dude with shared values, not some weirdo "alpha male lone wolf leader of the pack" dude.
Touché!
I bet you're also budgeting to fit into the life style and not complaining and demanding to go out to clubs and restaurants and concerts all the time too. (Well I hope you're not)
If you are frugal then I'd argue you're more rare as your husband. Most urbanized women want it all. A city life style with kids and restaurants every weekend and spontaneous designer shopping sprees and a nanny to help out with the kids. Fancy SUV, organic groceries, family trips to Hawaii every year, annual Disneyland passes, designer makeup and 10 new pair of shoes, buying any clothes on demand... just because you're a woman and a man should provide all of her wants? The US median household income is $75k per year yet most women want a $200k lifestyle. That's way more of an issue then men expecting some dishes to be put into a dishwasher.
@@IdealConscienceI think the flaw is thinking most women want that. Or realistically expect that. Sure, we all want that, but expecting it is like expecting to win the lottery when you don't even play.
@SayNoToBeingAHyena oh shut up!! Enough with the winning about black woman.
@@jenniferpearce1052 I'm not wrong and you proved it. You say I'm flawed thinking that most women want or expect the absurd high end lifestyle that isn't feasible to the median household income... and then admit that you all (women) want it like that to win the lottery without having to pay.
You can't make up the cognitive dissonance in modern women. It's astounding.
As a man, I didn't know until recently that so many men didn't understand this. None of it be a big hassle either. Aye Bae, I got trash, you get laundry, I'll clean the bathroom, you get the kitchen. I got dinner tonight, you cook on Wednesday. If you really not feeling it that day, I'll do it all tbh. You better not rush me, but I got it. Now when I really touch money, the only housework I'm doing is taking out trash. It's a partnership. You scratch my back, I scratch yours.
No
If you're both still working demanding jobs then the last part is a hard no. Just because you make more money doesn't mean her job is less work. Now if you make more money and ask her to stay home? Done dealio ❤
@@Alledowaya no
Yes! It's the double standard that women don't like. You can't demand that we both contribute 50% financially, but the mental load and home front responsibilities are 90% my responsibility. Times ten if children are involved.
Making me a married single mother is some form of abuse. My husband wanted me to always be juggling. Everything was so hard and it was somehow always my fault.
I've left him and only now can I see how bad it was. Everything is good without him. Better than good. Everything is easy and the standard tone of our home is laughter. I'm not struggling. People look down on single moms, but it's so much easier to be an effective parent when you don't have a sidekick that undermines you.
Leaving him really highlighted how much he was expecting and how little he participated.
And the lawn/ fix things
Housewives didn’t get up at 10am and chill. They treated it like a full-time job.
Some people enter at 10 to work. Her point is still the same
@@user-rt5rx4ki2wnah she thinks stay at home mom is just preparing and cooking dinner 1 h work a day. If you are stay at home mum it's full time not a part time hobby. You wake up before husband, make him coffee , breakfast, prepare lunch , prepare his shirts, same with kids, take kids to school and back. While on top of all things that comes up. A lot of women think being a stay home mum is just taking kids to school and back back and spending 7h on tik tok...😂
@@cuzIjustmost men at my workplace are bringing frozen food for lunch . They do their own laundry and wife and children’s laundry. They all have stay at home wives . Many of these men also pick up their children from school in the evenings. I’m am talking about 10-12 men . Don’t know what their wives do at home.
I am a traditional wife who gets up at 6, to take care of our family. My husband never asks me to help pay bills. I don’t ask him to do anything at home. There’s nothing wrong with this. I would never be able to sleep until 10 am. That’s the day half gone.
It's unreal that some men are expecting a woman to work AND be their tradwife. You get to pick one.
So, never depend on a man financially. It's still important to have your own career, even if you don't earn much. Never trust men if they say they can provide for u. Sure, they can, but as time goes, either he starts disrespecting u for being a freeloader or want u to start working but think you are not working hard enough
@@jasg771 I think you missed the point of my comment. I'm not sure what that last part of yours means. Was that your experience?
Would the circumstances change if the man is working 80 hours while the woman is working 40 hours (just curious)?
@@jayc5248 Honestly? It depends. I'd need more information to give my opinion on that
This is EXACTLY how it is, don’t even mention children which is a FULL TIME job, so now SHE has TWO full time jobs, how the hell is even right, why can’t people see this or mention this, thanks you for this general public announcement.
Well. Nice of ya to take care of stuff. Are you paying your half of the bills? If you aren't? Then why should he do half of the stuff around the house. If he pays all the bills. You can handle ALL of the stuff that money buys.
@@504cplol thats not what the video is about. She will be happy to stay home, if the guy comes home with enough money to support both of them. If not and both need to work full time, why should she do all the work around the house when they both pay the bills? And even then, even if he pays ALL the bills, at the end of the day, nobody likes a couch potatoe.
@@504cpDid you even watch the video?
@504cp you're the kind of man she's talking about
@@usernamenotfound101 exactly, lol, it went over this persons head, explains a lot from the “angry man syndrome” corner.
YES! I agree with this woman. 🙌🏻
I one hundred percent agree with her. My wife has never had to worry about a bill being paid. She has had complete freedom to do whatever she wants. I don’t ask her to clean the kitchen or do anything except for raise our children. It’s on me to provide for us. That’s the way it supposed to be.
So true. A lot of men want an independent partner but they want to be taken care of in a traditional way like their moms did.
I’m almost 50, had 3 long-term relationships and have been single for almost 4.5 years now. Life is much, much better without a man.
Yeap
Most women say the same thing, especially those who have been married
Amen! After 5 years of being cornered into working fulltime and doing all the chores (including mowing and garbage), I divorced him. It's been 43 years of bliss!
No more brown bed covers, surprise spending I didn't agree to, arguments over housework, public put downs, threats about if I ever gained weight, etc. None!
I own 2 small dogs and a cat. They provide the affection I missed those 5 years.
saying a lot of men, just means you need to go outside and touch grass and speak too men of this generation. that’s sad.
Thank you. Or wait for this. They want 50 50 but I do more. I be wife doing all hone chores. No. We share that too. If I share my $5k income all of in house hold. Honey do all too. I have no issue
This is exactly what I told my hubby before we got married. If I worked we share the home chores. If I’m not working he should expect to come home to a clean house and dinner ready. Now don’t abuse. Don’t leave your clothes and shoes everywhere for me to put away. No sir. He understood.
As long as your money is fully household money, like I'm sure his is.
@@Al-Rudigorbig assumption that hers isnt household money and his is fully household.
GURL !! You betta tell’em
For those thinking she’s belittling moms, she said stay at home wives not stay at home moms. We all know adding kids to the equation makes things much more challenging. And the point she’s making is that if a woman works outside the home she shouldn’t be doing more work inside the home than her husband does.
It seems she is belittling men and making a traditional husband something it actually isn't. She is essentially saying that if a man wants her to clean the kitchen, she should have an easy life...because he should be making the money to afford her that. Man working means financial needs, not wants, are met. Wife in the Home means domestic needs, not wants, are met. This is the baseline.
@@poorbanishedchildrenofEveYou need to watch again ; you are completely off target.
@@wordsculptI'm addressing the ricochet concept of the point she makes.
She says you cannot have stay at home wifey privileges if men don't make stay at home wifey money--then proceeds to say she should be able to wake up at 10, clean the kitchen and then lay out by the pool till evening.
She is making a trad wife something i5 isn't. And most depictions of trad wifey stuff isn't accurate either by those who claim to be. It is a rebound in the other direction of the absurdity of feminism.
Both are extremes and unrealistic.
I wake up at the Crack of dawn as a trad wife. I have a demanding job in the home as a trad wife with 10 kids.
There is still a give and take going on. It's not a contractual dynamic like a job is. She is literally treating the husband like an employer and she is laying out her "benefits."
This isn't a hot take
This is common sense
"Don't ask me to do anything your not willing to do" exactly.
As a man, I actually agree wholeheartedly
Girls, get yourself a man that does chores out of his own free will, without you asking for it. The kinda man that *knows* he lives there too, and never expected you to do ALL of it to begin with. That man will treat you like a human, not a maid or a mom (probably). Then go figure out whatever deal works best for the two of you✨
So true - works for me and my husband 🎉
THIS!! When my husband and I were dating, I told him straight up that I don't do toilets or dishes, but I'm an amazing cook, and I'll happily do everything else: sweep, mop, laundry, dust, bathtubs and skins, ect 😂. He said I had him at "I'm an amazing cook". He piches in with other things when he's home from work without me saying a thing. A good marriage is a beautiful thing ❤
YES! My husband is a morning person and I like to sleep in. He will make the kids breakfast and start laundry before I get up. All these things are done on a regular basis without me asking or making it an expectation.
Easier said than done. How many women actually stay in unhappy marriages. Men don't change after marriage, they just gradually show u their natural laziness. They never change
Yea because that’s an easy thing to do … lol have you seen the dating pool? I’m married and I would never want to get back out there
My husband and I used to be in the mentality of me still working when we had kids. I cleaned the house while he cooked and did yard work.
Now I'm a housewife/sahm who cleans, bakes him fresh sourdough bagels every week and watches our son. I get pampered with the self care I want when I want it because I do the harder part of making this house/family stable. If he wants a happy wife, he makes sure my needs are met because I make sure his are always met.
Exactly❤
If he up and leaves with his secretary, you have a gap in your resume and possibly no saving. Be careful out there love.
@@_JustSyd_ then that's just a sad excuse if a man you can't blame her for this if he is too much of a dipshit to not think about a women at home who is willing putting your needs at first making your house a home and you up and leave with any lady you see at work if that kinda men he is does it really matter if she works or not he's gonna do it anyway and the saving part it can happen being a housewife also she can demand money form him for her also he is after all her husband and that gap in resume then there are something one must sacrifice for something I know for some people it's too much but some people likes putting their family first then their Career it's not about being lazy and not going out there labouring about theirs 9 to 5 jobs it's just they like staying at home taking care of their kids and husband their family so what's wrong with it if you gets to choose you want a career then why can't they choose a traditional way of living
@@yoonajungkook6596 That’s not what she saying lol. She’s just advising her to have something of her own financially so that she not screwed if something unexpected ever happens to her man, which does happen a lot by the way.
Make sure you have something saved up your own or at least a decent education if anything ever happens to your man.
Finally a sane American woman with her logic intact.
I respect that, my wife works just as hard as I do and makes just as much as I do…we grind together day after day!!! Teamwork makes the dream work!!!
And that’s on PERIODT! I have been married for 27 years… when I met my husband he cooked,cleaned, worked and was in college… we married and shared the duties including taking care of our children. He is a wonderful father and I really love how loves and sacrifices for them even now that they are adults. He has never changed and I’m blessed to be with him.
❤❤
My bf is just like that, I hope our future is as bright as yours 🫶🏻
Wow! U sure are blessed , thank the heavens
❤
Approve that message. Some ladies out there work full-time, attend school, tutor kids, clean and cook.
Men didn't have a movement to be more like women. This is th3 lie of feminism.
@@poorbanishedchildrenofEve omg here we go again.
@Nithinithinith lol. Females who believed the lie they can do and have everything....pursue this lie to the natural conclusion and then get all mad when their men don't meet them halfway.
Men didn't fight to meet their women half way.
This was a liberation movement of women. Men didn't liberate themselves. Or maybe I missed that Day in history class.
And they are absolutely miserable
@@poorbanishedchildrenofEvewhat is your point? That you need to start a movement 😅
Agreed! Rational and reasonable.
She is so great!
I'm a woman, there was a few months last year where I was the only one working and paying bills. But my girlfriend was taking care of the house. The best feeling was coming home to a clean house and food being cooked and her making me my coffee. It made me realize how much I wanted to take care of her. And I realized if this is the kind of life I want I have to work hard to be able to provide for her.
Exactly, this seems to be rocket science to many.
I’m a woman with a female partner. This year I’ll get pregnant (for health reasons) then she’s going to stay at home with the kids because financially that makes sense. She’s great at domestic stuff too and she enjoys it more whereas I like working. It’s a great feeling and I’m super grateful to have this in my life. But… I worked hard for it, and none of it came easy.
That is so sweet and thank you for saying this publicly !
@@echotango4591god bless you and your future family!❤
@@echotango4591 how are you going to get pregnant? Like how?????
I was 9 months pregnant working still gotta come home to cook and clean while he relaxes while he relaxes from a long day of work 🤯 💯 agree with her
Not judging but why did you do that? Love chemicals? Or not knowing he wasn’t helpful before you were pregnant
@@LibertyMadison maybe he was physically attractive
Because the personality is lacking
And why did you even allow that to happen???
He's your ex... riiight??
Babe NO 😮😮 Throw the whole man away
Stay at home wife waking up at 10 am instead of 6:30 am to prep breakfast for her husband is the biggest joke I have heard in a while 😅
I was the primary breadwinner, but because I worked fewer days of the week (nurse), he expected me to do the bulk of the housework even though I was paying almost all the bills (he paid his car payment, insurance, student loans and bought some groceries. That's it. Always felt he'd have me paying those too if he could get away with it). He's now his mother's problem lol.
Facts! Why do i have to cook and clean when I'm also working a 9-5 job.
Ideally both are splitting cooking and cleaning or specializing-one outside (car maintenance, yard work, exterior repairs, household repairs) and the other inside (laundry, coking, housecleaning). Better yet, just stay single and each keep your own place and meet up when you want to see each other.
@@brianclark4040- false equivalence. Outside work dies not need to be done at the same frequency as inside work.
Why does he have to do the fixing and repairing of broken things that may be difficult and provide protection when he's also a working 9-5 job?
@@Brigadier07 - those things do not need to be done on a daily basis in the same way that cooking & cleaning do.
@@djlivvy46 They do. Not only that but if you do not cook dinner or wash the dishes every single day nothing really happens unless you seriously neglect it. If you let your house burn down because of unfixed appliance or your wife get assaulted because you just didn't feel like doing something about it that day it has different consequences. It is always so easy to dismiss things you never worry about until something happens.
Agreed. Wife and I both work outside the home. Our daughter goes to daycare.
When we are home, we are both fully engaged with chores, cleaning, taking care of our daughter, etc.
We know what each person prefers to do around the house and we have found our sweet spots.
That work too 😊
God bless you family
God bless your godly and wise teamwork
Same here. 50/50 is where it's at
See, this is completely possible all you have to be is a responsible adult who actually cares about your partner!
the 2nd one was my mom for the latter half of her life😅 my dad didn't even work at that point anymore
She is 💯 correct
You said what needed to be said. It is time for women not to feel like that HAVE to be a superwoman. We need relaxation, time to de-stress and balance in our life too. Men really out here looking for a mommy for themselves not a wife.
FR. Alot of them will not even scrub those tire tracks and splatters they left; in and on the tiolet bowel. The entitlement for the motherly maid, coined as SAH wife😏
A stay at home wife may wake up at 10 but a stay at home mom could never lol!
Lol so true! I'm soaking up all my stay at home wife time before I become a mom because I know I'll be begging for sleep when that happens 😂
False. Either get up and take kids to school come home and go back to bed, or you're homeschooling and teach them kids to sleep when you do. My kid always slept as long as I did. Never been able to stay home but summers and weekends, weekdays our sleep patterns ate the same
@@AG-nn8lp How can you wake up at 10 if the kids need to leave for school at 8 plus their breakfast and lunch needs to be made for them. Not to mention that SAHMs usually make breakfast and lunch for their husband before work too
Based...and true..
When my wife and I had children..we have 4..she stayed home with the kids..and take em to school and all that..
I make enough money for my wife not to work...
She's the best cook... awesome patient mother...house is always immaculate..
She has dinner ready for me..
She's my life..her job is priceless...and she raised well adjusted children...
@@user-bb4xk6bb7nxxx I got married young..
I was 23 and my wife was 21..
We had our first child 2 years later and all our kids are 2 years apart.
She couldn't have said it better!
She's no catch. That stay at home money is to no end. She ain't staying in an studio apartment. The man will likely not want a combative manwomen. He will likely leave. Tom Brady Tom Brady Tom Brady
Yep! When I worked, husband made sure he had his laundry, and our food wasn’t super homemade. Now that I’m home, I do 95% of the laundry and make most of our food homemade. Our work hasn’t always been “even” but it’s always been fair.
*Also, there’s always going to be times where each of us has to carry a little more of the load because *life happens,* but when we’re in routine and clicking along, we aim for fair.
In a good partnership, you should both feel like you're doing 80% of the work, it should never feel even.
@@CollinOffTheCuff if you are both giving 80 percent then thats technically even
I 💯 agree with her. Marriage is a partnership. You take care of each other. Period.
TRADITIONAL MUMS DON'T WAKE UP AT 10AM 😂😂😂
This is so true, simple as ABC!!!
I'm a super traditional stay at home mama. I completely agree.
Well, I’m a stay at home wife. My husband works. We have 6 children. I homeschool them all and I still need his help. Try teaching, cooking 3 meals a day, planing snacks, organizing a routine, cleaning, planning curriculums for different age groups, field trips/play date, grocery shopping, nursing, sports or extra activities for all children. Honey back in the day that was not a one woman’s show. You had grandparents, aunties and others helping out. I can assure you. A traditional man who only works and a woman staying home with no help…is utterly ridiculous. I’m just realizing I’m stressed and overwhelmed and it’s not worth your sanity, get all the help you can because that’s a 24/7 job and no days off. Not to mention children who have special needs. It’s not easy! But worth it for sure❤
Genuinely all the respect to you. I grew up with strong women role models like you. Their children (and grandchildren) are thriving decades later. Tbh I had always hoped I could do the same, but I never met a partner who was interested in such a life, so 🤷♀️ I live the single, childless life and hope my bro will let me help more with the nephews lol.
It takes a village to raise a child.
Goes to show thiers wisdom in old ways
Serious props to you! If you want to take on all those things, that’s totally cool; you go girl!
But I think this clip is actually agreeing with you! She’s talking about how domestic labor is labor, and it DOES take more than one adult… unless you can pay for relief from duties. I think she’s implying more broadly that “ideal” family life comes with a price tag, and men dreaming about building a beautiful big family like yours (and attracting a woman who wants that) need to be aware of the financial aspect. Random single dudes wanting to provide everything for a family need to pay for help for their future wives. So they can sleep in and not feel frazzled and overwhelmed.
She says stay at home wife not stay at home mom
Amazing work ❤❤❤
She seems delightful
She’s got a point. If both are working equally then both should participate in household equally
Yesss! men ask for us to pay for stuff, yet they won’t cook anything in the kitchen! What type of equal is that?
My mom got up before dad to fix breakfast and make lunches 6 am not 10. She was the last out of the kitchen too 8PM. 1 job paid for 4 people! Middle class ain't what it use to be.
Thank you. She clearly doesn't know any stay home wives/moms to say they get up at 10 and lounge by the pool. Honestly pissed me off. My sister is a stay home mom and I have done her full routine several times when she and her husband were out of town or something. She has 5 kids, 2 of them are toddlers 🥲. I was up at 6:30am and not done with everything until 10pm.
Being a stay at home wife/mom, I laughed when she said she wants to wake up at 10 every morning. That is not going to happen 😂
Nice to see I wasn’t the only stay at home mom who noticed this fallacy 😂 10 am with children yeah right.
Yeah 10am 😅 who is she kidding? Sounds like she’s never actually stayed home, especially not with kids.
My aunt was like this! But she did always sneak in a nap and TV time right after everyone was out and the kitchen was cleaned!
Immagine a minimum wage worker telling a doctor.. hey i work tooo lol
Umm what? My parents were traditional married couple. My mom didn’t wake up at 10, did a little cleaning and go “lounge”. She woke up before my dad, got breakfast ready for him and the kids. When everyone leaves for the day, she cooks lunch and dinner (cos Dad comes home to eat lunch), does the laundry, cleans the house. When we come home from school at 3, she does homework with us and feeds us. By the time that’s all done it’s already about 6pm and dad comes home, she prepares and serves dinner and then cleans up. Lol that’s a traditional wife. These females nowadays think being a proper housewife is “lounging” but she’ll demand he make a million dollars a month.
I think we as women just need to be smart about this. By all means, if your husband is making the amount of money that allows you to stay home with the kids and still live comfortably, then do it. But most people, especially if they want to keep a certain standard, will not be able to afford this nowadays. So most of us will have to make compromises and sacrifices in our relationships. Marry someone who understands this and is willing to do his part. Your partner shouldn't be someone that makes your life harder at the end of the day.
Learn to love ur kids instead of ur things n trips
@@YeshuaKingMessiah if you love your kids you will do anything to afford them a beautiful life. That should always be your first priority. There is no reasons whatsoever to stay home with older kids who are in school and after school activities, just because of this idea some men have of a stay at home mum, that's just not realistic. Welcome to the real world.
@@Louisa536 at 59, I think a I’ve seen the real world
Agreed!😊
@@YeshuaKingMessiah You think parents who both work don't love their kids? On what planet? Most couples who both work do so out of financial necessity. Also, having children does not mean a parent (usually the mother) must automatically give up her dreams and career goals.
Omg!!! ❤ my boyfriend wants a traditional wife (cook, clean, submissive, feminine etc etc). But he wants to go 50:50 dinner date. I told him today not to come visit me because I don’t feel like cooking for you 10pm at night when he pops in for a “cuddle”. I refuse.
Update:
He wanted to spend some time together. I told him. I am not cooking. He said he would. He put in some effort for the first time in over a year. Cooked steak, bean salad and a bottle of wine. Was nice.
I pulled back. He moved forward.
But he can’t help himself tho. He brought back the left over meat the next day.
I can feel that he loves me but I believe he is just stingy type of a person.
Good for you! A man who wants a traditional woman but also wants to go 50-50 is a taker, not a giver or provider.
U guys don't sound compatible. Sounds v one-sided. What u guys gonna do when kids come along? Red flag central.
He's coming by at 10pm for a cuddle and dinner? That's not a traditional man, that's a man who wants his cake and to eat it too.
I have a friend who has a boyfriend and a baby, and he "took her out for lunch". then asked her to pay half. when I tell you I died.
Girl ruuuuun, that man is a user.
SAH wife doesn't mean waking up at 10am, cleaning the kitchen, then lounging by the pool until your husband comes home.
Why not?
Absolutely agree with her.
I like this girl…she articulated this topic so matter of fact, easy to understand by anyone…..love it
Combative women make awful wives. She'll treat coworkers better than the husband.
FACTS! This is how a marriage works people. Don't ask your spouse to do anything you are not willing to do.
She said wake up at 10am and clean the kitchen and lounge by the pool while he makes the bacon. That's how marriage works for you? You sure about that?
Can she fight an intruder before 10am? 😅 Can she open a pickle jar or kill a spider. Ahahaha
@@b.r3228The kids will likely look like the Mail man, pool boy and personal trainer. Lol😅 Good Luck
She is SPOT ON .
Wake up people
I LOVE THIS. Thank you for speaking about this topic!!
I work 4 am till midday my wife works 8-5. I get the kids from school prepare and start dinner do a hour housework each day to stay on top and when she comes home we finish cooking together then both have a hour to relax. She does house work on Saturdays while I’m and work and Sunday is family day. Routine is the important part of it.
Expecting to get more than you're willing to give is an unrealistic expectation in a healthy relationship.
She ain't lyiin 🙌...
If you’re a full-time housewife and mother, you sure as hell aren’t getting up that late at 10:00 AM!
Omg ive been a stay at home mom for the first 8 years of parenthood and yeah, there was no waking up at 10 and lounging by the pool.😂😂😂
I’m trynna to tell you!!😂
She said wife not mom
@@bunnilinnie6615finaly somone other than me said it. Its a BIG difference
@@bunnilinnie6615 Somebody who wants a traditional wife, probably wants kids too.
Yeah it’s a bit of an exaggeration staying home is alot of work especially with kids
Make sure you’re getting up in the morning making breakfast taking the kids to school going doing groceries doing the household duties clean cook go do all the errands. Get groceries. Make sure your husband has a hot meal when he gets home and tend to his needs and help the kids with homework while cleaning the rest of the house that’s a housewife got it.
See that’s exactly what I tell some of these men out here. Any reasonable person would understand what she’s saying. Some of these men really hate the idea of doing any housework and they actually work less and get paid less. There’s a lot of useless men that want more than they deserve. I see it in the Philippines a lot and it’s not even necessarily with OFWs. I call some of them cousins.
It’s because of the dumb RedPill/ ManOSphere content that’s been shoved down their throats where that entitlement comes from unfortunately.
I agree with the second part. If she’s making half of the money you do half of the chores at home.
But stay at home wife is waking up with your husband, get both your breakfast ready, take the kids to school, grocery shopping, clean the house, laundry, pick up the kids, feed them, make them study, take them to sport practice, prepare dinner, etc. There’s no pool involved in the process!
Her definition of a house wife is waking up at 10 to swim at the pool 😂😂😂