This video makes me appreciate my loving parents even more, but it saddens me to think that many humans don't have the same kind of good relationship with their family.
Just be happy you have a great family and love them as much as you can, because sometimes they’re gone before you know it. Sorry that got dark but what I meant was that you should always remember to love your family. ❤️
Yep cuz in my neighborhood most kids turn into brats because parents reaaallly spoil them or they are super strict which makes them sometimes rebel and also most of the parents here are in very unhealthy relationships (don’t ask how I know this cuz this comments too long but yeah these are examples of how some parents can be like) so yeah... be kinda grateful that your parents actually care about you
_My mom always answered every question that my dad has asked *me*, but I also have a speech disorder (It's not Dyslexia, I just can't put the sentences right or saying things incorrectly) and my dad was always pissed_ _That's why I'm afraid of talking to my parents of how I truly feel_
I just want to say, I love the fact that the children were drawn with tiny little plants growing out of their heads. After noticing the amount of people who liked this, let me ask a question, if you could pick any plant to grow out of the top of your head, what would you choose and why?
@Bell What's that? Nevermind, I just looked it up and that is an excellent choice, pink isn't one of my favorite colors but it is a nice plant to look at.
I had a father but like he was always working so he didn’t even know my birthday and sometimes forgot my name ;-; he was also abusive but not as abusive as my mother so 🤷♀️
my father never really loved me and never listened, he was always (and still is) shouting at me, he doesn't remember my birthday, my middle name, or even my gender. he called be a boy for about 4 months after i got my hair cut short even after i told him i was a girl
I feel like my family is so negative that I'm growing up extremely positive, since I have to find happiness on my own. Edit: Since I commented this, I have gained enough self awareness to relize I wasn't a happy person at all xD. At least not how I thought I was.
That is me. I've had a rough life but I try to stay optimistic. When I was depressed and hated myself, my family called me pessimistic. I am much more positive but my family is always focusing on the negative. I've tried to cheer them up but they tell me to shut up. And sometimes I start feeling down and they call me negative instead of trying to make me feel better. I have become more desensitized to the insults, but sometimes it still hurts. I know it's not their fault so I care for them anyway. I think that's why I crave to be truly cared about by someone and I really want a relationship.
@Maren M. However they have suffered a lot in their early days and those pains can never go away...You just got to live with it or make a room for it...
not once did i think my parents were “soulmates”. I didn’t even realize what a romantic relationship was supposed to be. There was no, and is no affection or love in their relationship. edit: It was more like ‘oh they live in a house and tolerate each other at best’
I was only spanked two times as a kid. I am not a parent nor do I plan on having kids but as long it’s not too severe I think spanking might not be such a bad disciplinary tactic. I never did those things again.😆
Is this why I have Angina attacks or are those caused by something else? (I saw something about spankings leading to heart problems and an Angina attack involves the heart not getting enough oxygen rich blood causing a sharp pain sensation in your chest or back, leading to the neck, arms, and jaw)
I mean you're not wrong. Families definitely affect how a person ends up in adulthood. It's up to us to break away from the things that cause us to become stressed; even if they are relatives. Don't give up.
I turned 18 this year and yeah my life would have been decent without my shitty mom. I didnt have a dad, My mom was abusive and I was kicked out at 15 for being gay lololol so yeah
0:39 If your parents were highly strict, you may grow up to be codependent 1:09 If your parents have a broken marriage, it changes your romantic demands 1:46 If your parents micromanage you, you're more likely to develop depression 2:20 If your parents watch TV with you when you were a toddler instead of reading to you, it can suppress your communication skills 2:55 If you copied your parents a lot, you're more likely to be open to other cultures 3:31 If you were spanked as a child, you may become sneakier as an adult in some countries 4:10 If your parents have a drug or alcohol addiction, you're susceptible to perfectionism 4:45 If you have a close relationship with your father, you're more likely to enter healthier relationships
I feel like family affects my personality a lot, so much that they give me stress and anxiety and lonliness and depression. I feel like I'm being criticized a lot for just being myself, and I have just wanted to tell my parents how I felt, but always end in frustration with them. I have been abused before, both mentally and physically and emotionally, so I haven't had much of a great childhood. I love my boyfriend, because he has been there for me when no one else has, even if it's on the phone. I've spent nights overthinking about the past, and being scared about the future. It scares me a lot. Sometimes I think I'm scared of commitment with my boyfriend, because I am afraid of being pregnant, which all comes back to my fear of needles. I might've been rambling on and on about most of my childhood, but I feel like I can comment on youtube about how I feel, because there are many caring people on youtube instead of my family. Thank you.
I know you guys did a single parent effects video but I was wondering if you could be more spicific? Like make a vid about growing up with only a mom or only a dad. I just think i would be interesting.
Parents are only a part of the equation. I had kick-ass parents too and instead got all my insecurities while being outside of the house and the family
Me: *Was spanked as a child* Also me: *Has secretly stayed up way too late playing electronics for the past 2-3 years without getting caught and is currently watching this video at midnight*
Grew up in a very emotionless home... it was very isolating. Because of my upbringing I became obsessed with how to have good relationships, I've read most of the popular books about relational psychology. My childhood could have had a negative impact on me but it didn't.
I kinda feel you.. my mom always locked herself away from me and when she didn‘t she’d emotionally and physically abuse me.. my sister was always the better one and I was always compared to her.. she herself also did that.. but I don’t blame her she was meant to be the perfect one so 🤷♀️.. in the end my sister ended up having anger issues, thinking she can do whatever she wants and being selfish (basically like my mother).. my father was also abusive but not as much as my mother.. He would always work and because of that he’d forget my birthday and sometimes my name.. it all got to a point where I got told that we’re not a family..
How healthy your household is equals how successful n forward you are in life .. which is unfortunate and unfair cuz ppl cannot choose their families ... and in my culture.. it’s always the kid’s fault when he/she complains about family.. it always ruins an impression about whoever complains.. ppl in my culture consider parents as flawless gods .. which discourages to speak up
I went to live w a parent w helicopter behavior bc they were mostly very stable. However, I felt I had lil to no freedom. But my orig parents, 1 w alcoholism, had me run away often just to be found. I requested to go live w this parent. I'm lucky the parent w alcoholism agreed & was freedom ridden. However, it was worse to live w them esp battling emotional neglect & abandonment on a regular, tho not always... Bc the helicopter parent died a decade ago, I'm plummeted drastically straight downhill. I'm still far downhill. I don't think I'll ever get thru their death until my time is up... 😑😶😐
Your parents actually influence whether you will have a victim mindset or a growth mindset. People with a victim mindset think they are the way they are and that they can't change themselves. People with a growth mindset are much more ambitious and believe they can improve themselves. If your parents were always mad at you for having bad grades or "underperforming", you're more likely to have the first one. If your parents were very stimulating to try harder and if they told you that one bad test didn't matter so much, you are more likely to have the latter! Also, how many damn videos do you guys publish per week? 😂
@@BrainsApplied ......maybe. I think it's the way I am I know I can change/fix it, but not sure how to do so, (this was incredibly difficult for me to put my thoughts into words for this, it also doesn't help that I'm using my phone. If you use your phone when you reply to someone they actually get a notification and their name turns blue, whatever that means).
@@EchthelionII I think so. There are type A & B personalities, but few can have both. Like ambiversion, a mix of extrovert & introvert lifestyles, some can be both but rarely are an equal 50/50 as most lean a Lil more towards 1 than the other tho they may be both.
Ugh... I relate a lot to the point 3, 4 and 8, especially 8 ... Authority parents lead to depression and worthlessness, being exposed to TV rather than books, a big yes. And 8... I won't say anything about it.
Honestly true- without the interet i would still be this close minded homofobic racistic person who talks behind everyones back and assumes everything abt everyone, thank god internet was able to teach me what my parents didnt
@@aaaaa-zx1fk honestly- yeah internet has it disqustin flaws, but without it i would still be this parent made- homofobic,racistic, talkimg behind everyones back not facing them,.always assuming shit about everyone-person. THANK GOD there was internet
I was spanked by my mom, dad, grandma, and grandpa, all cases of spanking varied from severe to minor, but the spanking from grandpa scarred me, he made me bled, cry, and almost go to the hospital due to my injury that he inflicted just cause of his anger and drinking issues. My dad doesn't care nor show any care about me but shows affection and gives gifts to my older brother only as I was just a child born from an accident, I felt like I wasn't meant to be here, I was only here cause mom and dad don't want an abortion since it goes against their belief, I feel not wanted, the only person who showed some compassion was Mom, but she was also the one who forced me to study until midnight during childhood as my education and grades were far more important then well-being, and if I fail, I'll be scolded, punished, be shamed in front of our relatives, and be titled an embarrassment. My brother, on the other hand, got what he wanted, the toys, the games, the care, and affection, they gave it to him. I was never showed what they gave to my brother and the only things I got were hand me downs from my brother which were most of the time near breaking point, and if those things break, I'll be blamed for it. I'm envious of my brother, he was given all things without work, even though I did more academically. The only time I was given attention when was when my grades are all perfect, if not I'll be ignored and treated as trash that never should be. Yet even with the treatment, they gave me, they expect me to treat them kindly and loyally when I grow up. What sick bullshit are they thinking? However, when I was given access to the internet, I made friends online that showed me affection, care, and praise, they ask me if I'm well, they gave me comfort, I'm really thankful I met them, even if it was just by chance, their impact on me was massive. I'm probably dead now without them.
Our parents inspire their own beliefs into us. And these beliefs shape our personality. Our relationships can also effect us in a similar manner to some degree.
Or lack thereof. 😞 I grew up tormented & hated by so many in school & neighborhoods. I also struggled making & keeping friends. I went from being very clingy to entirely avoidant & ghostly. 😑
@@osuushiza8 Same as me, I was always on one extreme or the other. Due to some childhood misfortunes. But thankfully now I'm much better after learning how to value myself, learning to be more honest and expressing myself and my needs without being clingy. Doing away with people who made me feel ashamed in any way when I expressed myself, and bringing those close who encouraged to do so. And working on myself. It was hard, but I'm so glad I did! I still sometimes struggle. But I'm way better than before!
@@titlespree I've had to do away w ppl too & now have literally almost no1 in my life bc of it. I'm undecided about fully fleeing to another place to stay away from my fam even. It's 2long a story 2dive into... But if I do that, I literally have only 1 person to talk to, but only online. We never met in person. I'm an introverted ambivert, but I get very lonely to the pt that I've grown to hate warm seasons & love the cold 1s despite I freeze too easily! O_o
@@osuushiza8 Its always a good idea to go to another place. But even if you can't you should keep getting to know more people without being clingy. I recommend that you don't be totally alone. I've been there and it only gets worse. Make as many friends as you can. You will definitely find great ppl.. Sooner or later! 👍👍 If you insist on being alone.. Then busy yourself with some passion or work. That will kill the loneliness... For some time. What has worked for me (and is still working) is a combination of both of the above. Even older friends have changed & don't find me clingy now because I have to direct my energy to my passion/work as well. Anyways, all the best for your future! ❤
@@titlespree I've tried that too, even just making acquaintances. It's never worked for me. I'd also try to work or go to school, but everything gets in the way esp transportation issues. They are simple to fix like for other ppl. Things don't come smoothly 2wards me but rather harshly against me. I often believe I'm under a form of demonic curse. No, I'm not exaggerating.
The last one made me cry. I don't have a close relationship with my dad most of the time when he get home from work he will make a sandwich then go to the basement and watch TV
Physically? I ask as I was emotionally neglected abandoned a lot but not always, by a parent w alcoholism, & a parent that worked, a mixture of both. I hope ur OK.
That explains why my classmate gets angry for always asking her if is it okay how i am doing. I mean. I always need a sort of confirmation sadly. NO1 tho. Edit: And No3. Edit2: And NO6... Edit3: And NO7....
My parents aren’t divorced but I don’t understand why, most people doesn’t want their parents to divorce but in my case it is the opposite. They always fight for absolutely no reason at all, I haven’t even seen them hold hands before and when my father tends to be nice and ask if she wants a cup tea my mother would say “no I can get it myself” in a cold tone. Even my oldest sister says she has NEVER since birth seen them being nice to each other. Not only that honestly I don’t feel loved in this family in any kind of way, kids at my school would get worse grades than me and their parents would comfort them and treat them out. If I got a low grade my parents would just be disappointed and scold me. Their parents would treat their wounds if they were injured or someone messed with them. My parents would say “why didn’t you run or hit the person back” or just say “go get yourself a bandage or something” I am always the last one to be chosen in the family, I am always the one at fault, I am always the one who has to sit on the ground while eating when the table was full. You might think I am just overreacting but that’s just how I am. Don’t get me wrong though, I love my parents and family more than anything or anyone I just feel like they don’t love me back as I love them. And for the sake of my parents and little siblings I really want them to divorce. To be honest the only thing I want in life is to dance as it is my nr. 1 priority. When I was 12 I recently quit Taekwondo (everyone in my family did Taekwondo and we are 8 siblings so like bruh) as I Found it really boring. My mother then asked me and my brother if we wanted to join any other sports and my reply was a little hesitant as I was nervous to open up about dancing but I said I wanted to start dancing. At least my parents agreed on one thing and that was NO DANCING. I was so heartbroken that day. You probably don’t understand how important dancing is to me but I would do ANYTHING to keep dancing. Wow you are still reading? Damn boi congrats you just witnessed my life story
I wouldn't say my parents are helicopter parents, especially not my dad, but my mom is definitely controlling but she also expects me to know everything even though she does a lot of things without even showing me how. I still feel that I'm not in control of my life because I'm under prepared for whatever future I might have, so I usually go along with what mom thinks I should do because she has more experience than I do. I don't know if I trust her for everything but she also guilts me into trusting her. Dad's a whole different story, though. He's there in my life but he never really made an effort to see me for several years. He's kinda mean, so I guess that worked out okay.
What if my family is a combination of these types. Like my family expects a lot from me but they also go out almost every night to drink leaving me and my sisters alone. They're very strict on some things but completely ignore the other things.
I have a father who can’t stop drinking and often comes home from work drunk, I’m always to scared to confront him or even help him so I just look after my younger siblings. I guess that explains why I’m so tough on myself in school
I’m the 6 type And yes im very sneaky on everything i do like pretending to sleep- or study- and a lot of stuff. Then i just hide my phone in the pillow or my pencil case
My family is super duper supportive, they’ve made me believe that even with the many limits i have due to disabilities and such, i can still do great things.
These videos are so calming and stressful at the same time. I LOVE THEM. They help open my eyes on things I need to fix in my life, like the relationship with my father.
Umm.. I can't explain how much excited and hyped I am after you said a demiseuxality based video is waiting to be uploaded,so I literally came running as soon as I got the notification. Hope to get it sooner! Anyways Thanks for such great content which is helping millions of us to take a deep look into life.
I watched this video to answer my essay. I always wonder why I am so lazy doing household chores. My mom always choses clothes for me for more than half of my life. When I was 17, I chose my own clothes and she was SO DISAPPOINTED, she'd been avoiding me for 2 days. Now I'm 19, still lazy to do household chores. They're still very strict. I'm a sneaky person, I always lie about my whereabouts just to avoid their angry voices. I'm Asian, a Filipino to be exact. And I can't wait to have my freedom once I graduate.
I'm getting married in three months, more in love with him than I ever thought I could be, but I have such a heavy past, all of it is manifested into extremely attached and scared behaviours. My partner is fine with it, but I'm in such turmoil every day -- worst part is, I cant experience these needy emotions without feeling bad about them, so that adds to everything. I identify with almost every scenario in this video. I suddenly don't feel like I'm ready to get married in three months...
@@herrforehead6033 It went very well 😄 I'm still having a lot of issues, but you know, the people you surround yourself with can make or break your situation. I know many people will say we have to be strong enough to not rely on others, and relying is unhealthy, but I think that's what companionship is meant to be. While I'm the one struggling with the most, he relies on me too for happiness. Thank you for asking, just giving advice into the void!
@@ktbdw2403 That's good to hear! And you're welcome! Your husband seems like a good man, kudos to him for not treating you(or anyone) poorly- Also thank you for the advice brotato chip, I'll use it when the time comes (:
This video is nice to watch. As a child I was given bags full of mixed messages "you can do anything" "you will never be able to do that because you don't have the head start like most kids" "you have to try hard no one else can do it only you" "he's 10 years old he shouldn't be playing with toys he should have a job on the paper round" "when your 12 you'll pay rent" "your a smart kid but you have to actually believe that you are". I grew up never knowing my mum and dad loving each other they were always divorced and always hated each other saying bad things about one and the other in front of me. I asked my mum to not do it and she said she'll never lie to me so she'll never lie what she thinks of my dad. I've had two step dad's, one used to always punish me for being a child he treated me 4 years older then what I was when I played with toys he would take them off me and sometime break them. The other one treated me like a second son but one who's also a solider he actually told me if I didn't get into the army then I'll be living on the streets in 5 years time that was 4 years ago I'm at uni now. He's nice to me and treated me discipline but also was quite verbally and sometimes physically abusive never out of spite but because he saw me as a solider I do love him and respect him he raised three boys that aren't his own and two that are for that I do love him. My step mum is really nice how ever too sensitive she told me that my dad is proud of me and that he loves me more than my actual dad does. My dad is my beat freind he taut me right and wrong how to treat people, hes taught me its ok to be high on the highs and be low on the lows he's a wise man. My mum is the strongest person ever she's raised three bois that are hers and two that aren't she's gone through he'll and back and still comes home smiling even if it for a brief second she my hero even if I don't tell her she is she and my dad raised me so why am i not happy?
All that is inherited from my parents is being a severe codependence 😔😔 Spank!? Uh my parents knew it better by belt 😔😔 But I better somehow break this chain here. Tnx for your vid!
Teachers in my school said during a meeting that "you are all direct reflections of your parents" but I don't believe that. If this were true I wouldn't have any friends, I wouldn't have an open mindset when it comes to diversity, I would DEFINITELY not be pan, and I would be very abusive to everyone except for people I could leech off of. I sincerely hope that I continue to choose my own path because what school is constantly telling me and other students is that we are all mindless zombies who ignorantly follow all the social norms and have no personal beliefs. But I won't follow that no matter how much people say your family determines your life it's not true.
I'm sure that I'm a mixed of my parents. I can see that before watching this video. Do you guys realize yours too? I feel hopeless and scared now, feel like I can't be myself :'( I feel like I wanna blame them but it's useless and no make sense at all. I bet my parents will sad or confused hearing about this. I just notice the negative ones. My mom is sensitive and clueless like I am, and My Father is egoistic like I am.. and the good side and similarity between my mom and my father is the selflessness while I don't have that.
My parents got divorced when I was 5, got back together when I was 8, then divorced again when I was 9. I'm 13 now and every guy I've crushed on has had high amounts of loyalty and compassion, which is exactly what I'm looking for to fill that horrible empty void in me. Everytime I've gone to bed since I was 5, I have had a hard time sleeping bc I just feel like something is missing from my life.
I feel so bad for you, as I am around your age. I cannot even imagine the pain you might have gone through. I just hope that you have someone who you can trust and will help you :))
My parents divorced when I was 8, but the worst thing was that my parents never fought. Ever. Like, they where like Hollywood tv parents, complete movie stars. It turned out that my mother had a disorder that affected her mood without her control and my father was going through severe depression and anxiety trying to keep her happy because she could be dangerous when she got mad. The only problem with my childhood was the fact that my mother or father would smack me or my sisters if we broke the rules, but being young I thought that was normal. The reason I bought up the fact that my parents never ever fought was because contrary to a lot of peoples beliefs, that was the tipping point that thrust me into a downward spiral of depression, anxiety and even eating disorders for the next few years. How? Well, because it made it impossible for me to understand why they would divorce in the first place. I had movie-star parents one day and two school bags the next. It made me believe it was my fault, and I thought i was one mistake to much for them. Soon after I came out as Lesbian to my parents at age 11 my father accused me of self-labelling, claiming I was giving myself excuses for attention. That worsened my self esteem and the spiral spun faster. After that my Dad got a degree in physiology and tried to “help” me ineffectively. Despite this it’s definitely my mother who I’m on worse terms with, mainly due to the fact that there is a possibility I could’ve inherited the mood disorder from her and her blatant denial of it, blaming every outburst on hormones. Luckily I’m much better now, but I thought I should share my story. Thanks for reading this comment and I hope you have a wonderful day! 😊
My dad just recently passed away this April 9. I was very close with him, he was my best friend. I believe I met the love of my life, in a lot of ways he reminds me of my father. He’s a good man and I feel very blessed that he got to meet my father before he passed. My dad really liked him and told me multiple times he approved. I’m in a very healthy relationship with the man I hope to marry someday. So yeah, I’m a statistic.
I've been trying to change my personality for everyone else for years, and now I have a split personality, one for each person I know....so yah.... horray!
My parents love me and my siblings but have also been severely mentally/ emotionally abusive and physically abusive ( not as much as the mental abuse i received but still there.) when i was younger i was ‘the smartest’ of my siblings, with high expectations. My parents have always only ever expressed disappointment, violence not to mention they are extremely critical. As a child i wanted to turn them in to the police for abuse, but then i’d feel guilty and think how much i loved them and them me, but my older brother who was severely physically abused by my dad, DID go to the police, but as my parents were somewhat upstanding citizens no one believed him, he ended up in foster care for behavioural issues, where he then got into drugs and other things... but there is one more thing, me and said brother are both type 1 diabetics as it runs in our family, our eldest brother doesn’t suffer with the disease, but when he was diagnosed he went off the rails just before he ended up in foster care, 6 years later when i was 12, i was diagnosed with diabetes, initially i was okay with it and controlled it well whilst my parents supported me, but me being the star female athlete of my school (cause my parents pushed me so much) and the diabetes started to affect my athletic ability, i had less energy and my blood sugar would drop too low when exercising. Plus when i lost so much weight from the initial diagnosis, i was also diagnosed with anorexia so with all that my parents began to reject me. And now anytime i bring up diabetes or treatments or a hope for a cure they shut me down entirely, nowadays the only way i can get their attention is by not taking care of myself and ending up in hospital, which will eventually kill me. I just turned 17 last week and now i want to die more than ever, i’ve suffered with depression since i was about 5, i remember crying in bed wishing i was never born as i listened to my older brother scream as my father beat him. Now life is just one big struggle. But i DO love my parents, no matter how much they break me. We moved to spain 4 years ago and i was raped by 2 classmates but i cant tell anyone because it would be too painful and my parents would never forgive me. No matter how much they abuse me or tell me to kill myself i will love them unconditionally even though i don’t want to. But now im so screwed up. I just want some help
My mom was like number 3, but now I have stronger thoughts, and I can finally do what I want instead of what she wants me to do. She was like 6 (not anymore, I think is because I growed up) and, honestly, what you said is true
Grew up in extremely physically abusive household. Disabled from attempted suicide, which my therapist said was caused by my parents. My personality is extremely closed off & shy. My mom said the suicide attempt was my fault and she takes no responsibility for my being disabled, even refusing to install railings at our house. Every time I needed to get in or out, i required assistance. I told her what my therapist said about how I was predisposed to suicide bc of her and my even more physically abusive dead dad, but she brushed it off and said that didn't count towards how good of a parent she was. Very telling.
I'm number seven, may I just say that its accurate as hell? I may be childish, but I can do tons of adult things. I've still waiting to become 14 so I can have a job, though.
I want my loving family back My parents are divorced and both are married to someone else 1 of them is loving and the other is narcissistic. Im with the narcissistic one. Please like to spread the message.
As a kid, my parents never read to me. It would usually be me asking my sister to read me a book so I can sleep. I can talk fine but I do stutter and have trouble coming up with some words a bit from time to time. Thanks so much, I love this channel and never want anything to change.
I myself who has a close relationship with my dad, I’m very aware of my romantic status. I think it’s just me trying to find someone that gives me the comfort and happiness that my dad gave, and still gives me❤️
*me tearing up tissue paper and saying that it’s me looking sad* Me: look guys..... it’s me..... I’m broken. Vid: these parents decide everything for their children, which could lead to depression and feeling of worthlessness. Me: hehe.... it really is me.... hehehehe....*starts crying* Never thought this would happen
Thelastonemademesadbecausemyfatheristerribleandimnotclosewithhimatall Also, I think you missed Anger Issues=Depression/More anger issues Cause That's pretty much My father In a Nutshell Anger issues
I grew up with a meth addicted abusive dad. It made my sister obsessed with making everything perfect and she has bad ocd. It got to the point that we stopped asking her to do things because she would end up freaking out when she did something wrong. She didn’t want to take responsibility and learn from mistakes. She would just break things and hurt me and herself. So I always hated perfection, and I hated emotional things so I became a lazy emotionless teen.
I’m growing up in a toxic family I’m 14 dealing with major stress and I’m in pain but silently. My sisters have it better than me I’m the eldest yes and they say middle kids have it worst well in my case I do. I fear to tell my family stuff and I kept everything to myself my mom told me if I were ever depressed she is sending me to a mental hospital, and she said “No man is allowed to verbally abuse you, Only I am allowed to.” I had empty promises my whole life and I never cared about my problems I put everyone else problems first..my friends worry about me and I tell them “I’m okay please believe me.” I know what I do is wrong I should talk to someone but I can’t cause I have no one
I'm the exact opposite. I can never finish something that's big and ambitious. If I'm close to give my all to a 100%, I almost go out of my way to make sure that never happens. I have no idea as to why. Might be because I'm scared to put myself out there. I'm scared to try too hard and be ambitious because I'll just be embarrassed when I fail.
@@viktorthevictor6240 I struggle to finish things bc I'm scatter minded. On top of it, I also have difficulty starting anything, for a few yrs now, as I have apathy overload like motivational overkill... I feel it's useless bc other BS will occur, & I don't mean Lil obstacles, but emotionally draining, semi soul sucking labor hardship almost or fully impossible to fix.
My dad was never really there for me as a kid still isn't. He would often spend his time working and when he has free time he would still work, this is surprisingly accurate because most of my relationships don't end well.
Damn, it hurts even more when you're aware of this information, yet you see this be repeated with your younger siblings. It hurts so much to be a coward.
@@Helloo298 protect yourself. and keep being you you are born a certain way. Not everything is for you. not all rockclimb or paint. or like cars. be yourself. your comfort zone is to protect you. it's who you are. we. are. not. the. same. we should Not try to do everything others do. or be all things. we can't. accept your born limitations. love yourself. do not go with the flow. ignore the crowds. the majority. they are wrong. be you. be kind and find God
![โรงเรียนตอนตี 2 โคตรหลอน..!! [โรงเรียนไดเม่]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/2MAEMwqVYh8/mqdefault.jpg)
*Am I the only one who hasn’t been surrounded by a loving family my whole life?*
No. This was a pandemic or epidemic then & has spread like a wildfire...
...definitely not.
No
Your not alone brother❤
No. I think there was like 2 people that actually have.
This video makes me appreciate my loving parents even more, but it saddens me to think that many humans don't have the same kind of good relationship with their family.
damn you lucky XD
Just be happy you have a great family and love them as much as you can, because sometimes they’re gone before you know it. Sorry that got dark but what I meant was that you should always remember to love your family. ❤️
Yep cuz in my neighborhood most kids turn into brats because parents reaaallly spoil them or they are super strict which makes them sometimes rebel and also most of the parents here are in very unhealthy relationships (don’t ask how I know this cuz this comments too long but yeah these are examples of how some parents can be like) so yeah... be kinda grateful that your parents actually care about you
Nice that you have gotten to grow up with both parents. I have a step dad now and mmm, I hate my life for many reasons, mainly my step sibblings
And aliens
Also being interrupted/never listened to can cause a stutter or fear of speaking up
Which is why I stutter sometimes and rarely speak up
Im with you on that one
lol, now I know why I stutter sometimes and I take too long to respond
Same
_My mom always answered every question that my dad has asked *me*, but I also have a speech disorder (It's not Dyslexia, I just can't put the sentences right or saying things incorrectly) and my dad was always pissed_
_That's why I'm afraid of talking to my parents of how I truly feel_
Wow so many likes I’m glad I helped some people!
I just want to say, I love the fact that the children were drawn with tiny little plants growing out of their heads. After noticing the amount of people who liked this, let me ask a question, if you could pick any plant to grow out of the top of your head, what would you choose and why?
I really wish I had a little plant growing from my head
@@kidinthekelp5570 What kind of plant would you choose and why?
Sunflower because yellow colour makes me happy
@@rhea2257 You could also receive sunflower seeds from it if I'm not mistaken.
@Bell What's that? Nevermind, I just looked it up and that is an excellent choice, pink isn't one of my favorite colors but it is a nice plant to look at.
Number 8: Close with fathe-
N o p e
Lol I never had a father
I also never had a father. I grew up with my mother only and don’t even know who my father is ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
I had a father but like he was always working so he didn’t even know my birthday and sometimes forgot my name ;-; he was also abusive but not as abusive as my mother so 🤷♀️
my father never really loved me and never listened, he was always (and still is) shouting at me, he doesn't remember my birthday, my middle name, or even my gender. he called be a boy for about 4 months after i got my hair cut short even after i told him i was a girl
I have a father but he never really talks to me or my sisters and doesn’t even know our birthdays but now he’s trying more :)
I feel like my family is so negative that I'm growing up extremely positive, since I have to find happiness on my own.
Edit: Since I commented this, I have gained enough self awareness to relize I wasn't a happy person at all xD. At least not how I thought I was.
That is me. I've had a rough life but I try to stay optimistic. When I was depressed and hated myself, my family called me pessimistic. I am much more positive but my family is always focusing on the negative. I've tried to cheer them up but they tell me to shut up. And sometimes I start feeling down and they call me negative instead of trying to make me feel better. I have become more desensitized to the insults, but sometimes it still hurts. I know it's not their fault so I care for them anyway.
I think that's why I crave to be truly cared about by someone and I really want a relationship.
@Maren M.
However they have suffered a lot in their early days and those pains can never go away...You just got to live with it or make a room for it...
Yeah
Yeah because in maths - - =+ in words it's: negative×negative= positive
Same bro. I feel you.
Yay family, my favourite topic of the year
You are not the only one, just go thru it and move forward.
Why? Do you have a problem?
You know what forget it ,if you don't want to talk about it then don't
Det vore bäst om du bara fortsätter framåt
It’d probably be best for you to go to a Counselor or Therapist, alotta folks seem to have the same issue with their families-
@@Ghosty0623 jesus chill mate
not once did i think my parents were “soulmates”. I didn’t even realize what a romantic relationship was supposed to be. There was no, and is no affection or love in their relationship.
edit: It was more like ‘oh they live in a house and tolerate each other at best’
same
Yeah, same :/
My partners parents was like that too.
OMG SAME
Welcome to the happy accidents club
A better title: "This is why you are so messed up"😂😂
Why
Looool
Yeah....
This is so sad that it's funny 😂
Ahahaahhaha
"If you were spanked as a child you have higher chances of dying at a younger age of cancer"
Thanks parents.
Gee, thanks mom and dad, I now have higher chances of cance
Thanks mom😒
I was only spanked two times as a kid. I am not a parent nor do I plan on having kids but as long it’s not too severe I think spanking might not be such a bad disciplinary tactic. I never did those things again.😆
Is this why I have Angina attacks or are those caused by something else?
(I saw something about spankings leading to heart problems and an Angina attack involves the heart not getting enough oxygen rich blood causing a sharp pain sensation in your chest or back, leading to the neck, arms, and jaw)
Thx mommy
Sneaky, depressed, perfectionist, romantically messed up...and now thirsty after watching this. Where's my whisky...
🤣🤣😂
Cheers
By thirsty I thought you meant you were horny.
MrWillcapone Sorry for being one year late but here’s your whisky!
At least a good choice of alcohol ... did u find it?
Family? Sorry I only know extra stress on my life
relatable
Honestly same
Omg
Never in my life have i related more to anything then i relate to this right now
Shit... the most relatable comment.
Same :(
I mean you're not wrong. Families definitely affect how a person ends up in adulthood.
It's up to us to break away from the things that cause us to become stressed; even if they are relatives. Don't give up.
Definitely. Our nature and environment shape us.
That's why after being independent I have distanced from family and now my mother plays victim and tries to get sympathy
I turned 18 this year and yeah my life would have been decent without my shitty mom. I didnt have a dad, My mom was abusive and I was kicked out at 15 for being gay lololol so yeah
@sunnie became crazy I feel sorry for you bro. Maybe meditation might work.
Family has a massive affect! My family are negative which meant I grew up negative😩💔
We must get BETTER! :D
🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔
🤔The majority of your comments (That I’ve seen) have the moaning emoji in them.🤔
🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔
That's so sad 😔
I think we are the same person somehow
I feel you there
0:39 If your parents were highly strict, you may grow up to be codependent
1:09 If your parents have a broken marriage, it changes your romantic demands
1:46 If your parents micromanage you, you're more likely to develop depression
2:20 If your parents watch TV with you when you were a toddler instead of reading to you, it can suppress your communication skills
2:55 If you copied your parents a lot, you're more likely to be open to other cultures
3:31 If you were spanked as a child, you may become sneakier as an adult in some countries
4:10
If your parents have a drug or alcohol addiction, you're susceptible to perfectionism
4:45
If you have a close relationship with your father, you're more likely to enter healthier relationships
Thank you so much this is so useful!
I have a very healthy relationship with my father
I feel like family affects my personality a lot, so much that they give me stress and anxiety and lonliness and depression. I feel like I'm being criticized a lot for just being myself, and I have just wanted to tell my parents how I felt, but always end in frustration with them. I have been abused before, both mentally and physically and emotionally, so I haven't had much of a great childhood. I love my boyfriend, because he has been there for me when no one else has, even if it's on the phone. I've spent nights overthinking about the past, and being scared about the future. It scares me a lot. Sometimes I think I'm scared of commitment with my boyfriend, because I am afraid of being pregnant, which all comes back to my fear of needles. I might've been rambling on and on about most of my childhood, but I feel like I can comment on youtube about how I feel, because there are many caring people on youtube instead of my family. Thank you.
I can relate to you on another level 💔
Same here, I just want to live far away with my crush and start a family with him.
I know you guys did a single parent effects video but I was wondering if you could be more spicific?
Like make a vid about growing up with only a mom or only a dad. I just think i would be interesting.
Yep! We can definitely do that. It was actually also requested in our patreon community.
Yes please!
Gamer family:
Grows up to be an epic gamer
vAqeii, that impressive😲👏🏻👏🏻❤️
bruh moment
💀
Hehe, yeah me too.
I want to be that kind of dad! :)
My parents are truly amazing and never abused me, read to me, cared for me, and were always there for me
How did I turn out like this
Girl your lucky, my mom is the opposite.
Maybe too much attention?? Idk man
Parents are only a part of the equation. I had kick-ass parents too and instead got all my insecurities while being outside of the house and the family
Check out school life(teacher last, classmates), friend groups, the rest of the family, unfulfilled childhood dreams.
It can be biology, genetics.
Me: *Was spanked as a child*
Also me: *Has secretly stayed up way too late playing electronics for the past 2-3 years without getting caught and is currently watching this video at midnight*
Lmao mood
Yeah I guess the video was spot on in That regard
Same
Same tho
Jacksit MOOD
I was often spanked as a kid, and I am hella sneaky. Guess that one point is true about me xD.
omg SAME
also on a side note personally i agree with spanking
Yes, sneaking away from the spanking.
Ain't nobody got the time to cop a beating.
Doesn't eveyone get hit by their parents?
aaa aa depends where you live
Grew up in a very emotionless home... it was very isolating. Because of my upbringing I became obsessed with how to have good relationships, I've read most of the popular books about relational psychology. My childhood could have had a negative impact on me but it didn't.
Moses Emmet you are strong if that didn't effect you
I kinda feel you.. my mom always locked herself away from me and when she didn‘t she’d emotionally and physically abuse me.. my sister was always the better one and I was always compared to her.. she herself also did that.. but I don’t blame her she was meant to be the perfect one so 🤷♀️.. in the end my sister ended up having anger issues, thinking she can do whatever she wants and being selfish (basically like my mother).. my father was also abusive but not as much as my mother.. He would always work and because of that he’d forget my birthday and sometimes my name.. it all got to a point where I got told that we’re not a family..
How healthy your household is equals how successful n forward you are in life .. which is unfortunate and unfair cuz ppl cannot choose their families ...
and in my culture.. it’s always the kid’s fault when he/she complains about family.. it always ruins an impression about whoever complains.. ppl in my culture consider parents as flawless gods .. which discourages to speak up
Indian culture ?
I went to live w a parent w helicopter behavior bc they were mostly very stable. However, I felt I had lil to no freedom. But my orig parents, 1 w alcoholism, had me run away often just to be found. I requested to go live w this parent. I'm lucky the parent w alcoholism agreed & was freedom ridden. However, it was worse to live w them esp battling emotional neglect & abandonment on a regular, tho not always...
Bc the helicopter parent died a decade ago, I'm plummeted drastically straight downhill. I'm still far downhill. I don't think I'll ever get thru their death until my time is up... 😑😶😐
Most Asian families, yes
Idk what culture you're talking about but that's also true for arabic culture
Asian parents
Nah, these don’t apply to me, I don’t think
“Poor communication skills”
Me: *Oh*
Mother: 3 little pigs-
Kid: why?
Mother: beacuse.
what's the point
halo•halo I think this is beacause that’s also bad behavior by the parents.
@@fcff7591 oh
XD
because they need a treesome ma boi
Your parents actually influence whether you will have a victim mindset or a growth mindset.
People with a victim mindset think they are the way they are and that they can't change themselves. People with a growth mindset are much more ambitious and believe they can improve themselves.
If your parents were always mad at you for having bad grades or "underperforming", you're more likely to have the first one. If your parents were very stimulating to try harder and if they told you that one bad test didn't matter so much, you are more likely to have the latter!
Also, how many damn videos do you guys publish per week?
😂
Is it possible to have both?
@@EchthelionII You mean for some skills / activities you have a growth mindset and for others you have a fixed one?
@@BrainsApplied ......maybe. I think it's the way I am I know I can change/fix it, but not sure how to do so, (this was incredibly difficult for me to put my thoughts into words for this, it also doesn't help that I'm using my phone. If you use your phone when you reply to someone they actually get a notification and their name turns blue, whatever that means).
@@EchthelionII I think so. There are type A & B personalities, but few can have both. Like ambiversion, a mix of extrovert & introvert lifestyles, some can be both but rarely are an equal 50/50 as most lean a Lil more towards 1 than the other tho they may be both.
Odd. I grew up the 1st 1. I have 2 sis that grew up w the 2nd. Some other sibs I have grew up w a bit of both...
Ugh... I relate a lot to the point 3, 4 and 8, especially 8 ...
Authority parents lead to depression and worthlessness, being exposed to TV rather than books, a big yes. And 8... I won't say anything about it.
How I ended up like the person that I am:
*The internet*
Honestly true- without the interet i would still be this close minded homofobic racistic person who talks behind everyones back and assumes everything abt everyone, thank god internet was able to teach me what my parents didnt
I don't think the Internet is bad I think the new generation made it bad and worse
@@aaaaa-zx1fk honestly- yeah internet has it disqustin flaws, but without it i would still be this parent made- homofobic,racistic, talkimg behind everyones back not facing them,.always assuming shit about everyone-person. THANK GOD there was internet
@@Edge_Walker wth without the Internet people be horrible wow
@@Edge_Walker I think the good times with Internet has finished now it got worse cus new generation is here
I was spanked by my mom, dad, grandma, and grandpa, all cases of spanking varied from severe to minor, but the spanking from grandpa scarred me, he made me bled, cry, and almost go to the hospital due to my injury that he inflicted just cause of his anger and drinking issues. My dad doesn't care nor show any care about me but shows affection and gives gifts to my older brother only as I was just a child born from an accident, I felt like I wasn't meant to be here, I was only here cause mom and dad don't want an abortion since it goes against their belief, I feel not wanted, the only person who showed some compassion was Mom, but she was also the one who forced me to study until midnight during childhood as my education and grades were far more important then well-being, and if I fail, I'll be scolded, punished, be shamed in front of our relatives, and be titled an embarrassment. My brother, on the other hand, got what he wanted, the toys, the games, the care, and affection, they gave it to him. I was never showed what they gave to my brother and the only things I got were hand me downs from my brother which were most of the time near breaking point, and if those things break, I'll be blamed for it. I'm envious of my brother, he was given all things without work, even though I did more academically. The only time I was given attention when was when my grades are all perfect, if not I'll be ignored and treated as trash that never should be. Yet even with the treatment, they gave me, they expect me to treat them kindly and loyally when I grow up. What sick bullshit are they thinking? However, when I was given access to the internet, I made friends online that showed me affection, care, and praise, they ask me if I'm well, they gave me comfort, I'm really thankful I met them, even if it was just by chance, their impact on me was massive. I'm probably dead now without them.
I need to show my parents the part where you talk about codependency and the authoritarian parenting style. That was so on point.
i loved the office reference :)
=]
Our parents inspire their own beliefs into us. And these beliefs shape our personality. Our relationships can also effect us in a similar manner to some degree.
Or lack thereof. 😞
I grew up tormented & hated by so many in school & neighborhoods. I also struggled making & keeping friends. I went from being very clingy to entirely avoidant & ghostly. 😑
@@osuushiza8 Same as me, I was always on one extreme or the other. Due to some childhood misfortunes. But thankfully now I'm much better after learning how to value myself, learning to be more honest and expressing myself and my needs without being clingy. Doing away with people who made me feel ashamed in any way when I expressed myself, and bringing those close who encouraged to do so. And working on myself. It was hard, but I'm so glad I did!
I still sometimes struggle. But I'm way better than before!
@@titlespree I've had to do away w ppl too & now have literally almost no1 in my life bc of it. I'm undecided about fully fleeing to another place to stay away from my fam even. It's 2long a story 2dive into... But if I do that, I literally have only 1 person to talk to, but only online. We never met in person.
I'm an introverted ambivert, but I get very lonely to the pt that I've grown to hate warm seasons & love the cold 1s despite I freeze too easily! O_o
@@osuushiza8 Its always a good idea to go to another place. But even if you can't you should keep getting to know more people without being clingy. I recommend that you don't be totally alone. I've been there and it only gets worse. Make as many friends as you can. You will definitely find great ppl.. Sooner or later! 👍👍
If you insist on being alone.. Then busy yourself with some passion or work. That will kill the loneliness... For some time.
What has worked for me (and is still working) is a combination of both of the above.
Even older friends have changed & don't find me clingy now because I have to direct my energy to my passion/work as well.
Anyways, all the best for your future! ❤
@@titlespree I've tried that too, even just making acquaintances. It's never worked for me. I'd also try to work or go to school, but everything gets in the way esp transportation issues. They are simple to fix like for other ppl. Things don't come smoothly 2wards me but rather harshly against me. I often believe I'm under a form of demonic curse. No, I'm not exaggerating.
Isn't this the same as "8 ways your childhood affects your lifestyle" it's exactly the same right?
ChaosBlade10 that was the title they put in the video but the title of the video says family instead of childhood 🤔
It is the same, they just changed the drawings
My parents are the “broken lovers”
They fight and make up than fight again
:(
And Definitely high standards
That's my mom and her bf, or I can say my little sister's parents
The last one made me cry. I don't have a close relationship with my dad most of the time when he get home from work he will make a sandwich then go to the basement and watch TV
exactly my dad.
he's a narcissist. and I became one too
Can you do a video explaining a few religions? I think its important for people to be educated even if they are strongly religious already.
You mean like a religion crash course?
@@Psych2go yes just like that
And make sure to please do not mix culture with religion
@@Skincarelover123
- do not mix culture with religion
How is that supposed to work? Religion is an inherently cultural phenomenon.
Stretop Overmind an example of culture is Latino and an example is Islam. U can be Latino and Muslim.
What about if you were severely neglected & didn’t really have much or any interaction with a parent or parent figure?
Physically? I ask as I was emotionally neglected abandoned a lot but not always, by a parent w alcoholism, & a parent that worked, a mixture of both.
I hope ur OK.
You end up saving the world by killing Voldemort
osuushiza8 I had the same issues.
@@hyenasheep5099 What's the concept tho?
I was emotionally neglected by my father and now I have no interactions with him despite us living under the same roof
smh what has become of us?
That explains why my classmate gets angry for always asking her if is it okay how i am doing. I mean. I always need a sort of confirmation sadly. NO1 tho.
Edit: And No3.
Edit2: And NO6...
Edit3: And NO7....
1 6 and 7 are too relatable in my opinion
My parents aren’t divorced but I don’t understand why, most people doesn’t want their parents to divorce but in my case it is the opposite. They always fight for absolutely no reason at all, I haven’t even seen them hold hands before and when my father tends to be nice and ask if she wants a cup tea my mother would
say “no I can get it myself” in a cold tone. Even my oldest sister says she has NEVER since birth seen them being nice to each other.
Not only that honestly I don’t feel loved in this family in any kind of way, kids at my school would get worse grades than me and their parents would comfort them and treat them out. If I got a low grade my parents would just be disappointed and scold me. Their parents would treat their wounds if they were injured or someone messed with them. My parents would say “why didn’t you run or hit the person back” or just say “go get yourself a bandage or something” I am always the last one to be chosen in the family, I am always the one at fault, I am always the one who has to sit on the ground while eating when the table was full.
You might think I am just overreacting but that’s just how I am. Don’t get me wrong though, I love my parents and family more than anything or anyone I just feel like they don’t love me back as I love them. And for the sake of my parents and little siblings I really want them to divorce.
To be honest the only thing I want in life is to dance as it is my nr. 1 priority. When I was 12 I recently quit Taekwondo (everyone in my family did Taekwondo and we are 8 siblings so like bruh) as I Found it really boring. My mother then asked me and my brother if we wanted to join any other sports and my reply was a little hesitant as I was nervous to open up about dancing but I said I wanted to start dancing. At least my parents agreed on one thing and that was NO DANCING. I was so heartbroken that day. You probably don’t understand how important dancing is to me but I would do ANYTHING to keep dancing.
Wow you are still reading? Damn boi congrats you just witnessed my life story
I'm so sorry for you (╥﹏╥)
curiosity: are you interested in dancing cause you are "mochi's wife" XD?
@Kyoko Saikou :P
Lol, I have danced since I was 12 so not actually. But I guess you can say that Bts inspired me to dance more :)
I wouldn't say my parents are helicopter parents, especially not my dad, but my mom is definitely controlling but she also expects me to know everything even though she does a lot of things without even showing me how. I still feel that I'm not in control of my life because I'm under prepared for whatever future I might have, so I usually go along with what mom thinks I should do because she has more experience than I do. I don't know if I trust her for everything but she also guilts me into trusting her. Dad's a whole different story, though. He's there in my life but he never really made an effort to see me for several years. He's kinda mean, so I guess that worked out okay.
ORCA look up narcissistic personality disorder
why is this almost so relatable to my life...
What if my family is a combination of these types. Like my family expects a lot from me but they also go out almost every night to drink leaving me and my sisters alone. They're very strict on some things but completely ignore the other things.
Natasha Neko look into narcissistic personality disorder
@@agleshia2695 uff
I have a father who can’t stop drinking and often comes home from work drunk, I’m always to scared to confront him or even help him so I just look after my younger siblings. I guess that explains why I’m so tough on myself in school
The strict parents, micromanaging, and spanking part was relatable
I’m the 6 type
And yes im very sneaky on everything i do like pretending to sleep- or study- and a lot of stuff. Then i just hide my phone in the pillow or my pencil case
I was never hurt but I am sneaky (and have asthma) huh.
I was spanked and now I'm MORE sneaky. Thanks mom and dad -_-
Same!
"if you were spanked as a child you may become sneakier" *draws kid on their phone late at night*
me watching this video at 1am inside my covers: yes.
My family is super duper supportive, they’ve made me believe that even with the many limits i have due to disabilities and such, i can still do great things.
The sneaky one is so true
I'm insanely sneaky, and it's probably because of the spanking.
I resonate with the sneakiness from point 6, I will lie to my parents to avoid punishment from them
Dads.
These videos are so calming and stressful at the same time. I LOVE THEM. They help open my eyes on things I need to fix in my life, like the relationship with my father.
Umm.. I can't explain how much excited and hyped I am after you said a demiseuxality based video is waiting to be uploaded,so I literally came running as soon as I got the notification. Hope to get it sooner!
Anyways Thanks for such great content which is helping millions of us to take a deep look into life.
Who else either looks away, stares or starts tearing up when they see a good father with their child?
I never thought my perfectionist tendencies could be from taking care of my dad when I was younger.
I watched this video to answer my essay. I always wonder why I am so lazy doing household chores. My mom always choses clothes for me for more than half of my life. When I was 17, I chose my own clothes and she was SO DISAPPOINTED, she'd been avoiding me for 2 days. Now I'm 19, still lazy to do household chores. They're still very strict.
I'm a sneaky person, I always lie about my whereabouts just to avoid their angry voices. I'm Asian, a Filipino to be exact. And I can't wait to have my freedom once I graduate.
An addicted parent
Got tears in my eyes when it was brought up
Oh dear...
I honestly relate to all of these very, very much... (except the last one...)
Pray for meh.
Praying for you Jonathan. God loves you fiercely and passionately. Jesus gave His life for you. Remember that. Please take care.
so i’ll be a sneaky, depressed, codependent, perfectionist adult with high romantic demands...
nice.
I'm a sneaky person
I can relate to this soo much.
I'm getting married in three months, more in love with him than I ever thought I could be, but I have such a heavy past, all of it is manifested into extremely attached and scared behaviours. My partner is fine with it, but I'm in such turmoil every day -- worst part is, I cant experience these needy emotions without feeling bad about them, so that adds to everything. I identify with almost every scenario in this video. I suddenly don't feel like I'm ready to get married in three months...
How did the marriage go?
@@herrforehead6033 It went very well 😄 I'm still having a lot of issues, but you know, the people you surround yourself with can make or break your situation. I know many people will say we have to be strong enough to not rely on others, and relying is unhealthy, but I think that's what companionship is meant to be. While I'm the one struggling with the most, he relies on me too for happiness.
Thank you for asking, just giving advice into the void!
@@ktbdw2403 That's good to hear! And you're welcome! Your husband seems like a good man, kudos to him for not treating you(or anyone) poorly-
Also thank you for the advice brotato chip, I'll use it when the time comes (:
This video is nice to watch. As a child I was given bags full of mixed messages "you can do anything" "you will never be able to do that because you don't have the head start like most kids" "you have to try hard no one else can do it only you" "he's 10 years old he shouldn't be playing with toys he should have a job on the paper round" "when your 12 you'll pay rent" "your a smart kid but you have to actually believe that you are". I grew up never knowing my mum and dad loving each other they were always divorced and always hated each other saying bad things about one and the other in front of me. I asked my mum to not do it and she said she'll never lie to me so she'll never lie what she thinks of my dad. I've had two step dad's, one used to always punish me for being a child he treated me 4 years older then what I was when I played with toys he would take them off me and sometime break them. The other one treated me like a second son but one who's also a solider he actually told me if I didn't get into the army then I'll be living on the streets in 5 years time that was 4 years ago I'm at uni now. He's nice to me and treated me discipline but also was quite verbally and sometimes physically abusive never out of spite but because he saw me as a solider I do love him and respect him he raised three boys that aren't his own and two that are for that I do love him. My step mum is really nice how ever too sensitive she told me that my dad is proud of me and that he loves me more than my actual dad does. My dad is my beat freind he taut me right and wrong how to treat people, hes taught me its ok to be high on the highs and be low on the lows he's a wise man. My mum is the strongest person ever she's raised three bois that are hers and two that aren't she's gone through he'll and back and still comes home smiling even if it for a brief second she my hero even if I don't tell her she is she and my dad raised me so why am i not happy?
*video talking about kids who were spanked being sneaky*
me: *stocking up my secret stash of junk food*
coincidence?
Secretly steals their phones and keep it till later :P
2:48 *OMG ITS SPONGEBOB, MY FAVORITE SHOW WHEN I WAS 11 :’3*
No joke I’m actually glad to know about these facts. I will return someday-
It's maaagic ^^)
All that is inherited from my parents is being a severe codependence 😔😔
Spank!? Uh my parents knew it better by belt 😔😔
But I better somehow break this chain here. Tnx for your vid!
Me too. My father would leave bruises on our bodies.
[Insert TH-cam is broken because of views and likes comment]
When will those type if comments die out? It's been 4 years already
Teachers in my school said during a meeting that "you are all direct reflections of your parents" but I don't believe that. If this were true I wouldn't have any friends, I wouldn't have an open mindset when it comes to diversity, I would DEFINITELY not be pan, and I would be very abusive to everyone except for people I could leech off of. I sincerely hope that I continue to choose my own path because what school is constantly telling me and other students is that we are all mindless zombies who ignorantly follow all the social norms and have no personal beliefs. But I won't follow that no matter how much people say your family determines your life it's not true.
Me: hears *the one about spanking*
Also me: do chanclas count
I felt personally attacked 😣 but this is so true. Keep up the good work guys.
I got depression from my family. :(
What about a nice caring family
I'm sure that I'm a mixed of my parents. I can see that before watching this video. Do you guys realize yours too? I feel hopeless and scared now, feel like I can't be myself :'( I feel like I wanna blame them but it's useless and no make sense at all. I bet my parents will sad or confused hearing about this. I just notice the negative ones.
My mom is sensitive and clueless like I am, and My Father is egoistic like I am.. and the good side and similarity between my mom and my father is the selflessness while I don't have that.
My parents got divorced when I was 5, got back together when I was 8, then divorced again when I was 9. I'm 13 now and every guy I've crushed on has had high amounts of loyalty and compassion, which is exactly what I'm looking for to fill that horrible empty void in me.
Everytime I've gone to bed since I was 5, I have had a hard time sleeping bc I just feel like something is missing from my life.
I feel so bad for you, as I am around your age. I cannot even imagine the pain you might have gone through. I just hope that you have someone who you can trust and will help you :))
Also, if you drew your profile picture, it looks really good!
I don't have a close relationship with my dad, and feel empty inside. 😕
My parents divorced when I was 8, but the worst thing was that my parents never fought. Ever. Like, they where like Hollywood tv parents, complete movie stars. It turned out that my mother had a disorder that affected her mood without her control and my father was going through severe depression and anxiety trying to keep her happy because she could be dangerous when she got mad. The only problem with my childhood was the fact that my mother or father would smack me or my sisters if we broke the rules, but being young I thought that was normal. The reason I bought up the fact that my parents never ever fought was because contrary to a lot of peoples beliefs, that was the tipping point that thrust me into a downward spiral of depression, anxiety and even eating disorders for the next few years. How? Well, because it made it impossible for me to understand why they would divorce in the first place. I had movie-star parents one day and two school bags the next. It made me believe it was my fault, and I thought i was one mistake to much for them. Soon after I came out as Lesbian to my parents at age 11 my father accused me of self-labelling, claiming I was giving myself excuses for attention. That worsened my self esteem and the spiral spun faster. After that my Dad got a degree in physiology and tried to “help” me ineffectively. Despite this it’s definitely my mother who I’m on worse terms with, mainly due to the fact that there is a possibility I could’ve inherited the mood disorder from her and her blatant denial of it, blaming every outburst on hormones. Luckily I’m much better now, but I thought I should share my story. Thanks for reading this comment and I hope you have a wonderful day! 😊
Nice work keep it up.
I hope you have a good year.
My parents aren’t divorced but they don’t seem to love eachother?
Same
What if I love my friends more than my family?
What can you tell about me with that small information
It's quite normal.. I'm also like that
My dad just recently passed away this April 9. I was very close with him, he was my best friend. I believe I met the love of my life, in a lot of ways he reminds me of my father. He’s a good man and I feel very blessed that he got to meet my father before he passed. My dad really liked him and told me multiple times he approved. I’m in a very healthy relationship with the man I hope to marry someday. So yeah, I’m a statistic.
I am so grateful especially the last one.
So that explains my low self esteem...
WONDER WHY DAD
I'm pretty sure mine just comes from school lol
@@IDK-zg1uz same :(
@@laurensanchez5169 Stay strong. They probably just jealous of you
I've been trying to change my personality for everyone else for years, and now I have a split personality, one for each person I know....so yah.... horray!
What happens if two people are with you at same time does your brain split in half
don't do that .become one person again
I ruined myself like that. brokem forever
@@ExhaleToDecend
short circuits.
and freeze
HAHAHA! I relate to this video SOO much! 🤣 It’s quite sad actually... *raises hand at every family impact* Who else here relates?
Anyone here bc of that beautiful voice, so soothing to hear just beautiful. Makes me learn better
My parents love me and my siblings but have also been severely mentally/ emotionally abusive and physically abusive ( not as much as the mental abuse i received but still there.) when i was younger i was ‘the smartest’ of my siblings, with high expectations. My parents have always only ever expressed disappointment, violence not to mention they are extremely critical. As a child i wanted to turn them in to the police for abuse, but then i’d feel guilty and think how much i loved them and them me, but my older brother who was severely physically abused by my dad, DID go to the police, but as my parents were somewhat upstanding citizens no one believed him, he ended up in foster care for behavioural issues, where he then got into drugs and other things... but there is one more thing, me and said brother are both type 1 diabetics as it runs in our family, our eldest brother doesn’t suffer with the disease, but when he was diagnosed he went off the rails just before he ended up in foster care, 6 years later when i was 12, i was diagnosed with diabetes, initially i was okay with it and controlled it well whilst my parents supported me, but me being the star female athlete of my school (cause my parents pushed me so much) and the diabetes started to affect my athletic ability, i had less energy and my blood sugar would drop too low when exercising. Plus when i lost so much weight from the initial diagnosis, i was also diagnosed with anorexia so with all that my parents began to reject me. And now anytime i bring up diabetes or treatments or a hope for a cure they shut me down entirely, nowadays the only way i can get their attention is by not taking care of myself and ending up in hospital, which will eventually kill me. I just turned 17 last week and now i want to die more than ever, i’ve suffered with depression since i was about 5, i remember crying in bed wishing i was never born as i listened to my older brother scream as my father beat him. Now life is just one big struggle. But i DO love my parents, no matter how much they break me. We moved to spain 4 years ago and i was raped by 2 classmates but i cant tell anyone because it would be too painful and my parents would never forgive me. No matter how much they abuse me or tell me to kill myself i will love them unconditionally even though i don’t want to. But now im so screwed up. I just want some help
When I realise I’m a controlling perfectionist with daddy issues and everything this channel says I’d true tehee
I never had a gamer family
When I grow old I will make that happen
I've never clicked on a notification so fast before ;^; I love this channel so much ❤️
just in time because I just got home from school 💗
My mom was like number 3, but now I have stronger thoughts, and I can finally do what I want instead of what she wants me to do.
She was like 6 (not anymore, I think is because I growed up) and, honestly, what you said is true
Grew up in extremely physically abusive household. Disabled from attempted suicide, which my therapist said was caused by my parents. My personality is extremely closed off & shy. My mom said the suicide attempt was my fault and she takes no responsibility for my being disabled, even refusing to install railings at our house. Every time I needed to get in or out, i required assistance. I told her what my therapist said about how I was predisposed to suicide bc of her and my even more physically abusive dead dad, but she brushed it off and said that didn't count towards how good of a parent she was. Very telling.
I have a really toxic family.. i hope i dont end up with a bad personality..🙁
Well you seem to be someone wonderfull, i don't think you'll change, unless you wrongly go the wrong way
It's not a direct cause, rather indirectly. So it is definetly avoidable
I'm number seven, may I just say that its accurate as hell? I may be childish, but I can do tons of adult things. I've still waiting to become 14 so I can have a job, though.
I want my loving family back
My parents are divorced and both are married to someone else
1 of them is loving and the other is narcissistic. Im with the narcissistic one. Please like to spread the message.
As a kid, my parents never read to me. It would usually be me asking my sister to read me a book so I can sleep. I can talk fine but I do stutter and have trouble coming up with some words a bit from time to time. Thanks so much, I love this channel and never want anything to change.
Do you like to read to yourself? We're so happy you love our channel and thank you for sharing and watching :)
I myself who has a close relationship with my dad, I’m very aware of my romantic status. I think it’s just me trying to find someone that gives me the comfort and happiness that my dad gave, and still gives me❤️
*me tearing up tissue paper and saying that it’s me looking sad*
Me: look guys..... it’s me..... I’m broken.
Vid: these parents decide everything for their children, which could lead to depression and feeling of worthlessness.
Me: hehe.... it really is me.... hehehehe....*starts crying*
Never thought this would happen
Girl, you already uploaded this video lmao
Thelastonemademesadbecausemyfatheristerribleandimnotclosewithhimatall
Also, I think you missed
Anger Issues=Depression/More anger issues
Cause That's pretty much My father In a Nutshell
Anger issues
I grew up with a meth addicted abusive dad. It made my sister obsessed with making everything perfect and she has bad ocd. It got to the point that we stopped asking her to do things because she would end up freaking out when she did something wrong. She didn’t want to take responsibility and learn from mistakes. She would just break things and hurt me and herself. So I always hated perfection, and I hated emotional things so I became a lazy emotionless teen.
I’m growing up in a toxic family I’m 14 dealing with major stress and I’m in pain but silently.
My sisters have it better than me I’m the eldest yes and they say middle kids have it worst well in my case I do. I fear to tell my family stuff and I kept everything to myself my mom told me if I were ever depressed she is sending me to a mental hospital, and she said “No man is allowed to verbally abuse you, Only I am allowed to.” I had empty promises my whole life and I never cared about my problems I put everyone else problems first..my friends worry about me and I tell them “I’m okay please believe me.” I know what I do is wrong I should talk to someone but I can’t cause I have no one
I'm totally perfectionist ._. anyone else ?
I'm an all or nothing type, severely. It sux bc I procrastinate hardcore as too many obstacles have hit me2 hard & still do... 😑
I'm the exact opposite. I can never finish something that's big and ambitious. If I'm close to give my all to a 100%, I almost go out of my way to make sure that never happens. I have no idea as to why. Might be because I'm scared to put myself out there. I'm scared to try too hard and be ambitious because I'll just be embarrassed when I fail.
@@viktorthevictor6240 I struggle to finish things bc I'm scatter minded. On top of it, I also have difficulty starting anything, for a few yrs now, as I have apathy overload like motivational overkill... I feel it's useless bc other BS will occur, & I don't mean Lil obstacles, but emotionally draining, semi soul sucking labor hardship almost or fully impossible to fix.
Close with father= Healthier Relationships
My Dad: *says nothing*
OH WAIT MY DAD LEFT MY MOTHER AND I, HE CAN'T SAY ANYTHING
When your friends and even your bf have a good relationship with their parents LMAO CAN'T RELATE
you have a bf?
@@herrforehead6033 yea?
@@animani355 lucky-
congratulations gamer, hope you are doing well with that (:
@@herrforehead6033 Thank you 🥺
@@animani355 no problemo fam B)
My dad was never really there for me as a kid still isn't. He would often spend his time working and when he has free time he would still work, this is surprisingly accurate because most of my relationships don't end well.
Damn, it hurts even more when you're aware of this information, yet you see this be repeated with your younger siblings. It hurts so much to be a coward.
if you feel to get involved. then do it.
don't resist gut feeling.
@@VengefulPolititron yeah, thankfully I'm able to get more involved now
@@Helloo298 protect yourself.
and keep being you
you are born a certain way.
Not everything is for you.
not all rockclimb or paint. or like cars.
be yourself.
your comfort zone is to protect you.
it's who you are.
we. are. not. the. same.
we should Not try to do everything others do. or be all things.
we can't.
accept your born limitations.
love yourself.
do not go with the flow.
ignore the crowds. the majority.
they are wrong.
be you. be kind
and find God