A First-Hand Account of Delirium Tremens - Alcoholic Hallucinosis, Hallucinations, and Delusions
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 26 ก.ค. 2024
- Check my site for all my social links and more sobriety stuff: www.batcountry.co/
00:00 Introduction
00:30 Alcohol Withdrawal
02:28 Delirium Tremens
07:10 Background & Context
09:55 The First Hallucinations
27:02 The Faces
36:09 Other Hallucinations
40:35 The Worst Hallucination Of All
44:19 The Fear
48:23 The End
email me here: batcountryyt@gmail.com
In this ~long~ video, I talk in detail about my first-hand experience of alcoholic hallucinosis, delirium tremens, and acute alcohol withdrawal syndrome.
I've experienced delirium tremens and alcoholic hallucinations as a result of alcohol withdrawal several times. I thought it might be interesting to commit some of the experiences to video.
I'd live to hear your experiences, because there aren't enough out there.
Here's the book I mentioned: www.amazon.com/-/en/Stu-Nugen...
Bat Country site: www.batcountry.co/
Bat Country on Instagram: / batcountryyt
Bat Country on Twitter: / batcountryyt
Personal Twitter: / thatsextoyguy
Personal Mastodon: mas.to/@hungry_joe
Personal Bluesky: bsky.app/profile/thatsextoygu... - บันเทิง
My alcoholism made my life a total misery, and the withdrawal almost killed me.
I am a former serviceman and police officer. Had a few terrifying experiences involving firearms and the realisation that I was about to die. However, as an alcoholic in recovery, I can attest that nothing I have experienced during my service comes close to the terror of Delirium Tremens hallucinations. A totally terrifying and real experience. So pleased you have made this video. Extremely well elucidated. Thank you.
Hey mate, thank you for your service - various services in your case.
I reckon the fear of DTs might be worse for people who have seen danger. I speak to another serviceman, 2 tours and injuried out, whose hallucinations were worse than mine. I think our subconscious pulls out the fear we've experienced and magnifies it.
I appreciate you taking the time to comment, and congrats on your recovery.
Frontal lobe damage is associated with decreased impulse control. There was a railroad worker who had a piece of iron go right into that area, survived, and was reported to to have become a different, worse person
This guy has better story ideas in his hallucinations than I do in my journaling.
If he painted, he would be a modern-day Van Gogh
Hell exist... alcohol are key to this, dark dimension x.
It really is. When I was hungover I would be a sweaty shaky mess, completely depressed and too anxious to leave the house. I wouldn't know what was a thought, a dream, something that happened on TV or if it was something I did when I was drunk. Even 3 day benders when I wasn't hungover I remember feeling like I was losing my mind from the lack of sleep and the high amounts of alcohol, once I remember holding my head and just screaming because I just wanted to snap back to normal.
Your voice, accent and delivery are comforting even though the subject matter is not. Love the music and ambiance of the room. My son went through deliriim tremens several times in 2023. I saw him strapped to a chair in diapers. He was 33. He is still convinced people are out to get him the hallucinations haunting him in the real world. God help us.
If you've never been through it before and you're a heavy drinker then I promise you it will only be a matter of time that you do. It will totally surprise you out of the blue. It's like you've suddenly been transported to hell. You can't sleep you sweat and you'll feel your eyes starting to droop when suddenly you see the faces. I'm going through it again after this weekend's lapse after a 4 bottle session on rum. I stopped again on Monday Night. Last night was the only night I finally found some real sleep. I'm literally scared to go to bed just in case I'm transported into hell reality again. I can't go through this again. I have to stop for good this time. No sneaky cans of weak lager as that is how it progresses quickly onto the spirits. Thanks for your video. It's helped me
Yep. Thanks for saying this, it really does creep up on you.
@@_BatCountry Thanks for your videos. I managed to get through last night. It was my 4th night and I was no longer hallucinating but I did hear disturbing voices as I was trying to drop off to sleep. I ended up taking 15 mg of Mertazipine and got to sleep about 5:30 am and managed to sleep around 4hrs. I had some memorable dreams about friends in the past but they weren't too bad. I feel a lot better this morning. I managed to eat a bowl of museli without overheating and sweating. I think I'm over the worst. Tonight should be a lot better for sleep. I didn't know about the kindling effect but from watching your video I can relate to its effect personally. Every withdrawal seems to get worse and I couldn't work out why. Many thanks for your videos they've kept me on the right side of sanity through my withdrawal. I cannot thank you enough.
@@cjh0751hey buddy, keep it up. I’m sorry for what happened I hope now you’re alright and if you need somebody to talk to or just wants to share something we are here, this video is becoming a community. I just hope everything went fine since then and you’re back to reality. Keep going on with the sobriety, don’t touch that shit again
@@DortmundWolf Thanks for the kind words. I'm still off the booze. I'm taking it day by day. The Bat Country channel reminds me that we're not alone in this battle. We all need to help and encourage each other to stay sober.
me too, I saw demons. I was literally in hell.
Thank you for sharing your story. It takes a strong person to do so. I have also considered sharing my story, but I've been reluctant. Your story hit me hard, and brought flashbacks of that nightmare caused by AlcoHell. It's definitely given me PTSD, however I am learning to live with it. I quit drinking in 2017, by the Grace of God.
Edit: I would also like to add, these "hallucinations" that I experienced were definitely demonic, evil spirits. As a Christian, i believe there is a Hell, and Satan, and of course demons. I believe Alcohol, and drugs create a Portal to the other side, kinda like using a Ouija board. There's a reason these drinks are called _"Spirits"_
I was trapped in addiction, but I prayed myself out, and Jesus delivered me.
Your story so similar to mine. I’m 5 years sober this month. All the glory to Jesus ❤
@@laceycalhoun3203 Amen, Sister 🙏 Happy to hear that.💪💪 Praise the Lord, Jesus Christ! 🙏
I totally agree with you. My father is the alcoholic and it brought spirits..demons home. My mother got possessed. She's on "meds" now but I know that is just to numb her. My father even After Several DUIs, u being "poor" cuz of the debts he racked up due to the DUIs, restitution fees, alcohol spending, I thought we were "poor" therefore could not "afford" a babysitter, and my mother relapsing with these demons aka " mental illnesses " AND he still is an Alcoholic. You're right ..Alcohol is a gateway ..You're opening another dimension..to Hell!!!!! She would scream...talk like Carrie the movie..."they're burning me!!!" I brought a Priest to the home and no one knew about it except me and the driver..that thing inside her screamed expletives why the Priest was here?!?!?! Get Closer to God and choose your Friends Wisely. Blessings.
For a minute I thought I was having flashbacks to my hallucinosis episodes then realised it was the background music.
Yeah sorry about that - I chose this music specifically because it sounds exactly like what I hear.
@@_BatCountry it's spot on!
Stay strong friend, you can overcome alcoholism with the help of good friends, a good doctor and support from your AA or whatever you choose to find a way out. Stay strong!
When you know you are going to withdraw from alcohol you know that you are going to be in a world of pain. I used to look out of my window when withdrawing and wishing that I was anyone but me. This is because it was the first day of pain. Frightening and scary.
I agree…when I know it’s time to comedown…I feel the FEAR…makes things clearer…now I understand why some ppl commit to taking their lives…because they fear the pain and hurt of coming off…or why ppl never come off…
I had been drinking for around 30 years but over the last 15 years more and more heavily until I got to the point that I was starting to drink in the morning to take away the anxiety (I was up to around 4 bottles of wine a day at that point… but I still considered myself to be a “functioning alcoholic” I performed well at work and thought that my drinking wasn’t affecting my family (oh Mum’s always pissed in the evening…) until for various personal reasons and events I went on a 3 day binge and drank over 20 bottles of wine. My husband simply didn’t know what to do and he was working away in Ireland at the time… my daughter took charge, dressed me and drove me to the doctors where I was signed off work. That was my low point and I drank my last bottle of wine that afternoon (I couldn’t get anymore anyway as my husband had taken my car from me for safety reasons) by the late evening the vomiting started but it was mostly dry heaving as I hadn’t eaten for 4 days and I couldn’t keep down water. I hadn’t slept for 3 days but by the nighttime I was having the most horrifying closed eye hallucinations every time I tried to go to sleep. It would start with glowing cat like eyes in the distance then the images would get closer and closer changing into people, snakes, spiders, aliens or rotting corpses and demons all with sharp pointed teeth barred at me… all glowing brightly. I would try to keep my eyes closed as long as I could until the images rushed at me with their mouth’s open to attack me with the pointed teeth and I would scream and open my eyes and the images would disappear. I phoned my daughter in the morning and told her what was happening (I was still hallucinating at the time) and she called my doctor who immediately phoned me and told me to get to hospital. I didn’t want to go but he was persistent and kept ringing me until I agreed to go. My daughter and gp probably saved my life… I was in hospital for 5 days given medication and put on various Iv drips. I’m in a therapy group and I take medication 3 times a day to help reduce alcohol cravings. I’ve been alcohol free since the 9th April this year and after that horrifying experience I intend to keep it that way… my mental health has greatly improved since quitting which is ironic as I’d used alcohol to self medicate my anxiety and depression all those years. I thought alcohol was my friend, but it isn’t, it’s pure poison (well for me anyway) xxx
Hey Angela! Congratulations on making it out the other side of that experience. That term... functioning alcoholic... people always focus on the 'functioning' part and just ignore the most important part: alcoholic.
It sounds like you had a really rough experience with delirium tremens. It's life-changingly terrifying, isn't it? It's horrible to think that all those extreme, gory images are just sitting there inside our heads.
Anyway it seems like you have good people around you, and that's so important. I wish you success, and thank you for sharing your experience. I wish more people would be brave enough to do the same.
Amazing account. As someone who went through chronic benzo withdrawal ( which is very similar) I found Especially relatable are the voices (my mother in distress as well) also that super long narrative arch semi dream hallucinations. And the destroyed faces. I had similar ones seeing a delivery man with one of those destroyed faces caused me to crash my motorbike then a bus driver with the face of the devil who I had to talk to. The accusing stare of a dead roadkilled cat swivelling its head to follow me up and down the street. A long narrative arch story where I was a detective working in a red and black dark room dismantling the retinas of a dead mummified woman (found clutching her dead baby in a shower) in order to see the last thing she saw was. Which tuned out to some kind of hideous unholy creature from hell. Asking people about it "you know that mummified shower woman?" Still have actual dreams year later that go on for like full length novels, never had them before the addiction. Reckon my brain was permanently damaged in some way by the withdrawals and the siezures that followed.
Some say it’s a disease and some say it’s the devil
It's a burden you carry perhaps abuse perhaps no self worth but your right it is evil and it will consume you not an easy fight
Dude alcohol is definitely in a way more powerful and life changing than LSD and Mushrooms as well as other substances. I fucked up and binged drank with a friend from out of state for an entire week after being alcohol free for awhile.... I'm finally feeling better like 2 months later.... Stay safe and learn from past mistakes. Thanks for sharing your experience.
Yeah I heard my name and it was terrifying. And horrific faces when I would try to sleep and my heart would race. But once It's over It's a humbling experience. Alcohol opens doors to hell and that's what we see. When we are sober we are our actual selves and that's refreshing.
Very true, thanks for the comment Bradley!
Ive been totally gripped this week by your well constructed narratives and exceptionally open style. The Kazakh prison story blew my mind and actually made me glad I am older, female, unfit and thus never got the urge to cycle across a few continents while repeatedly blackout drunk. Your channel deserves a lot more subs man.
Hey Ruth! Thanks for watching, and for your comment. I don't advise a trip like mine to anyone, and I specifically don't recommend Kazakhstan. I met some truly brilliant, helpful people there, but even if you go as part of a group it can be a merciless place. And as for the open style? A good writer told me that if the thought of certain people reading your work doesn't make you nervous, you're not being honest enough. Good advice.
I noticed on another response you mention that it's important to confront yourself on video. I'm a late mid life alcoholic. (From my research, menopause is a huge trigger for women who have not had serious alcohol problems before). Never had a problem stopping drinking at university . Now, I can manage 4 or 5 days before the dopamine/oxytocin craving gets too strong and I have 'just the one glass of wine'. I doubt I am alone in this . Thanks for your candour on here, it is inspirational. ❤
Thank you so much. I had a really bad DT as you did and it's beyond imaginable. I had memory loss but the weird part is that I still remember the hallucinations, physical touches, the sentences - music in detail 2 years later. My brain managed to play music and lyrics that I never heard before, really great chorus music wise except for the time being of course. Sober now and I will never go through that hell again.
Wanna share a story too about dying from fear of the hallucinations. It’s not about me, it’s about my dad. Since I have memory he always had an alcohol problem, kinda like every 3/4 months he would take a week free from work and just drink all week. Sometimes even more, some times often. All my grandparents were alcoholic and my mom, brother and myself we always tried to stop him from drinking but he would eventually find a way to go buy alcohol. Hiding his keys or his wallet wouldn’t stop him. So we were always “he is used to it, we just have to wait for the week to pass and he will be sober again” big mistake. To anyone who has a beloved one who is an alcoholic, go to a detox, help them, do something cause you don’t wanna feel like me now. So about last week he started drinking again. Literally 1 or 2 bottles of vodka every day. Same as always I thought. Until yesterday.
Yesterday he stopped drinking completely, he began to shake as always but I noticed that the shakes were too “strong” he couldn’t even handle a glass of water without making water drop cause of the shakes. He couldn’t really walk, he was disoriented. But he was conscious and could talk. At some point I was smoking in the kitchen, he came, asked me to give him a cigarette. After the first 2 blows he turned to the fridge, started screaming and his face was getting purple. He was frozen and I touched him as his arms were still paralyzed towards him and he was hard as steel, I could see the veins on his neck getting bigger his eyes almost popping out. I was in panic totally panic I started screaming my mom and brother came and we managed to set him on the ground on a side of his body cause he was making bubbles from the mouth. I really thought my father would have died between my arms. As he started breathing again really loudly I was in a mix of anxiety and happiness. He vomited alcohol and blood probably because he bit his tongue. I was talking calmly to him telling him everything is all right that I’m there as my brother called the ambulance. And guys, I don’t know what that was but he was looking at me terrified, couldn’t recognize me, couldn’t talk, he was like very drunk again even if all day he was conscious and on the sober way, but never saw a drunk man like that. His eyes were looking at me and they were so disturbing. I can’t tell if it was fear, confusion or surprise of seeing me, whatever he saw by looking at me. And I’m pretty sure he saw something as he turned to the fridge back as when this “thing” started, hearing that delirium tremens leads to this experiences and seeing his face like that, his scream everything in those 10 seconds as this crisis started, made me think how lucky he was and it’s not one of the 40% of people that dies from this horrible experience. We don’t know if this was an epileptic attack or something near to a heart attack or panic. I still have to ask the doctor of the hospital.
The ambulance came, took him and I visited him today, he looks better but after this video I think he is probably still hallucinating. I just hope that the medications he is receiving are helping him to sleep.
I’ll talk tomorrow to him and ask him about everything cause this video made me realize that talking about it can only help, no shame.
And no shame in sharing this story, I was always ashamed of this side of my father and never really tried to help him or told anyone about this and I’m doing this now. Especially cause I’m sure a lot of people thinks like I did and they don’t really try to find a solution. Please drink responsibly if you can’t just cut it out like I did, I lost my driver license twice because of alcohol and I’m sober since 3 years now. And please help your beloved ones if they are alcoholic, don’t be to late
Wow what a terrible, terrifying experience, for everybody involved. You raise a point that I didn't cover: that it's terrifying to go through, but it's also scary for everybody else around.
Congrats on three years, Wolf!
Hope everythings ok man. 💪
Everything fine now. Well my dad is still recovering in hospital but it’s on the good way. Thanks for the messages guys, this video helped me a lot and I hope it helps others to understand how critical this experiences are
What a terrifying experience. I’m glad you and your brother and mom were there because if you weren’t there to help him and call 911 he probably would’ve died. What your dad went through was living hell and he was scared with what was happening to him physically and mentally. I went through that same thing last year and I was alone in a hotel room no one around I was ready to die I just asked god to please look after my wife and kids because they deserved so much better. I was shaking uncontrollably but then it passed. I messed up many more times after that but today I’m 4 months sober. What your dad needs to do is cut the head off the snake, eliminate alcohol, toxic people in his life and anything else that might affect him and make him turn to booze. All he needs is those that love him and all he should care about are the ones living within the 4 walls of his home. Nothing else matters tell him to tune out the negative and start over. He’s got this. Rooting for him and for you and your family-Joseph
@@jbenz1990 Great advice, and congrats on your sobriety!
I appreciate the subtle background sounds, music, sounds french. you incorporated into your video. It's awesome how you managed to capture those eerie, almost otherworldly sounds. During my own experience with DT's, I vividly recall hearing a mix of Mexican music and distant German soldiers. It's a chilling but incredibly intriguing touch, and it makes me believe that there might be another dimension that only our minds can unveil. It's scary, yet undeniably fascinating. I tripped on LSD and Shrooms before but nothing I mean nothing like alcohol withdrawals 100X more insane and realistic then LSD or Shrooms and it can last for weeks lol.
thank you for sharing. Having hallucinations that are so convincing that I knew what it must be like to have schizophrenia is what scared me away from alcohol for good. I still get chills thinking about it. At the same time its amazing what our minds are capable of.
I have also been through the cycle of binge drinking over a period of weeks and then going into acute withdrawal and I identified completely with your experiences of alcoholic hallucinosis as I have gone through this several times. It was exactly as you described, with it beginning as a sort of background hubbub, like I could hear the neighbour's TV through the wall, progressing to actual voices, me having an actual conversation with them, arguing with them, pleading with them. It was absolutely terrifying. And when I went to the A&E department armed with a self-diagnosis of alcoholic hallucinosis, the staff looked at me like I was talking nonsense. I don't think they'd ever heard of it, it's such a misunderstood complication of acute alcohol withdrawal. Thankyou for doing this video and reassuring me that I'm not the only person who's been through this.
It's really, really hard to try to describe this stuff to people who haven't been through it, isn't it? They look at you blankly like you're just describing a dream. But to us, it was viscerally real at the time. It's frustrating even trying to get people to understand the scale of the experience without sounding like a crazy person.
"Like I could hear the neighbour's TV through the wall." That's exactly it.
I feel you about the treatment too. The NHS tell you to call an ambulance as soon as you start hallucinating, but the staff aren't prepped for handling it. The first time it happened to me was in the UK and I had a similar experience. They put me on a drip on an open ward and just left me there. It's been different since it happened again in Germany where they did understand it, and knew how to treat it.
Anyway, I hope you're doing ok now :)
@@_BatCountry I'm sober at the moment and after having several traumatising experiences with alcoholic hallucinosis and delusional thinking, I'm determined to keep it that way. Every time I go through the withdrawals I am worried about the damage I'm doing to my brain, because of what I'm putting it through on a neurological level.
The last time I had to go to the hospital with alcoholic hallucinosis, I was aware that I was hallucinating. Like I said previously it started off sounding like the neighbour's TV through the wall, but then became more coherent and louder. It eventually manifested itself for some reason, as the voice of a Scottish woman, who was taunting me for trying to ignore her. I remember sitting in bed trying to read my book but she just kept repeating the words on the page in a mocking tone, laughing at me and taking the mickey. It was just relentless.
This is where it's going to sound really mad because I started talking back and telling her to go away, and then it was sort of like, 'well whose voice WOULD you want to have a chat with?' and for a joke I said, 'well Ricky Gervais probably'. And guess what? Suddenly it WAS Ricky Gervais's voice. ANd Karl Pilkington, and Stephen Merchant. And I was sat in my bedroom suddenly having a right laugh with the three of them.
It hadn't gone away by the morning, which is when I went to the A&E department. But how can you explain to the staff that you can hear Ricky Gervais in your head talking to you and cracking jokes without being sectioned immediately...? It seems ridiculous.
After about four hours in A&E those voices disappeared and I thought it was over, but then the delusional thinking started. I began to become convinced everyone in the waiting room was talking about me and criticising me. I thought they were looking at me funny. My mum was with me and she was frightened because none of it was real but I was getting really paranoid and vocal about how angry I was with them for talking about me. Luckily at that point the doctor saw me and I was medicated with librium. I went home and I slept it off, and thankfully the voices and the thoughts had gone away when I woke up.
Sorry for such a long post, but honestly, I have never found a video anywhere before that I could relate to so personally as much as yours. Thanks so much for putting it out there, and I'm glad you're in a much better place now :-)
@@CalicoKate13 I'm happy to hear you got through it and you're sober right now. And to be honest, not to minimise your experience, but if i could pick someone to have a hallucinated conversation with, it would probably be karl pilkington.
@@_BatCountry to be fair, that part of the hallucination was quite entertaining!
Thank you for your incite..it is very telling and yes very true as i have been down that rabbit hole myself ..alcohol is a narcotic but yes legal..at least in many countries..and we do believe that it is safe as it is legal and governments make billions off it but they said the same thing about cigarettes 50 years ago. I served in the army..i taught overseas..alcohol was everywhere..but i never thought i would become addicted to it..but i did..as you have..I appreciate your courage and honesty. Fortunately i did not have the DTs..but i definitely went through withdrawal..sleepless nights..some auditory illusions..but i still keep going back..beer was my friend..at one point until it wasnt..Brian from Canada.
I was released from hospital about 6 months ago after nasty DTs. The worst part is the delirium doesn’t start when you first stop drinking. You have to go through a few days extreme anxiety and pounding hearts. Then they come. I was screaming until they finally injected me with Valium. Makes me too terrified to drink again. I don’t remember a lot of my hallucinations, other than spiders and terrifying faces. And my name being said from different parts of the room in a demonic way. Thankfully my Mrs is a nurse and called the ambulance so quickly. Thanks for your story. It’s scary what alcohol can do.
I missed this comment when you posted it. I'm sorry you had to go through that, but happy the outcome was that you decided not to go through it again. Stay strong.
Has anyone else experienced hearing dead loved ones? To this day I don’t know if this was DT’s. I got out of bed one morning and heard my dead ex’s voice announce himself to me. We talked all day and it started off really pleasant (he died by suicide and we ended on a bad note so it felt like a blessing to get closure). As the day went on it started to become more demonic. It went from my exes voice telling me how much he loved me and to tell his family how much he loves them- to “I’m going to hell for dating you! Lord is bad! The demon is going to kill you!” At one point I even became convinced that my ex’s soul was trapped in my pillow by a demon. Ended up being hospitalized because I was shouting at things no one else could hear. To this day I don’t trust my perceptions anymore. The story is so much longer, but it’s honestly kind of re-traumatizing to type out the details.
I really do think alcohol opens up some type of demonic door. This happened 5 days after I stopped drinking cold turkey. What’s interesting to me is that there were no visual hallucinations, unlike a lot of the comments I’m reading. It was exclusively auditory.
I did all my loved ones were waiting for me very scary
If you continue drinking. It will become visual. I first heard voices then eventually it goes visual
@@churchy_one was it because of alcohol withdrawal? Or do you normally hear the dead?
@@Noyonboldoo I believe it. That’s terrifying. I’m sorry you experienced that. What’s weird is I didn’t have any other withdrawal symptoms when I was hallucinating. Did you? I’m thinking it might have been alcohol hallucinosis, rather than DT’s.
If anyone reading this is thinking about quitting cold turkey, please go to the ER and ask for a medical detox. Ideally one where therapy and educational groups are included. I got lucky and found a program with other alcoholics/addicts. We do group therapy and attend meetings. I’m now transitioning into a PHP and then IOP. Recovery is more than simply abstaining from alcohol. Recovery is learning to cope with life and building a life you don’t want to escape from.
I was drinking heavily and one day I saw some kind of dwarf in the kitchen. I screamed, “Who are you?” And he responded, “Who are you?” Well, I ran into the street barefoot in my vomited pants, the police caught me and took me to the ambulance. Three weeks in the hospital, a week in intensive care. The doctors said that cerebral edema had begun. I haven’t drunk since then. Alcohol delirium is an incredible horror
It’s weird how closely yet far similar the hallucinations are…my last go round with my hallucinations was like that too…I seen two dwarf like things…hiding behind the couch…then the stove…creepy things…
I did too
@user-lc4kr1yt4c During delirium, insects crawled over me and a cat walked on my back and rubbed its head against the back of my head. Although I never had a cat... And it felt as if my whole mouth was stuffed with either cotton wool or threads. I pulled these threads for hours from his own mouth and put it on his wrist... Complete madness
@@johnjoe3386 Yes. Horrors. Some monstrous faces, spiders, dead mutilated children. Sometimes I woke up in the middle of the night screaming wildly. I thought I would either die somewhere on the street or go crazy...
@@user-lu2xx7vn9wI'm glad you're doing better.
Thank you for sharing your experience. You got a knack for storytelling.
Thanks, I really appreciate that!
During my first night at rehab, I had an unusual experience. I vaguely woke up, thinking I could hear a radio playing Bob and Tom. The intriguing part was that it seemed to come from the hospital bed, creating a unique and calming atmosphere.
On the second day, everything was fine. However, the following night, I woke up to bright laser pointers of various colors shining through the window, creating a surreal scene. Imagining black ops scenarios outside, I became concerned about who else might be in the hospital. Venturing out, I overheard worried conversations, leading me to wedge a chair against my door for safety.
Soon after, a real doctor arrived, pointing out that I couldn't barricade myself. Later, I overheard a heated family argument that escalated into a tragic incident. Witnessing surreal events, like the appearance of Jamie Foxx, left a lasting impression. When I questioned nurses the next morning, they expressed concern about possible hallucinations. I chuckled it off, attributing it to a bizarre dream.
I can listen to you for hours.
The visuals are more vivid than human eyes can even see in real life
Absolutely true.
The hallucinations are incredibly terrifying when you’re in withdrawal
Wow this was incredible. I’ve had audible hallucinations after a bender before (voices tauntingly telling me that I was going to die… I didn’t) and have had visual hallucinations exactly one time (I saw a bunch of triangle-ish shaped spaceships in the atmosphere almost like an invasion). The majority of the terrifying experiences for me are the closed eye visuals - I never saw people or faces when I had my eyes open but when I would close my eyes it was a fucking trip. Like a nonstop movie that changes scenes every 5 seconds. Often about porn, sometimes about nonsensical stuff, and sometimes grotesque violence dreamt up from the deepest depths of my subconscious. I was always afraid of paying too much attention to the hallucinations or writing them down for fear they’d become more permanent or give them more staying power in the real world. Fascinating stuff about the two reoccurring people in the delirium tremens though I hadn’t heard that before. I feel like you tap into a weird alternate spiritual world when you’re up for days on end in withdrawal, almost like the reverse-DMT. It’s terrifying and definitely gives you motivation to live a good life lmao. You do feel a weird sense of conquering that other world though, not necessarily “conquering” but coming out with yourself intact knowing that that place didn’t break you. That place can drive lesser men into permanent psychosis/insanity or even death. You’re a spiritual warrior.
I’m coming up on 4 years sober now but I still felt that cold tinge of fear creep up when you were describing the hallucinations (although I didn’t have it as bad as you)
Yeah you're right - the closed-eye visualisations are wild. Yours sound like mine, loads of weird sex and extreme violence, almost beyond your control, like a movie, as you said. Thanks for the comment buddy.
@@_BatCountry Do you ever maladaptive daydream? I do a lot as a fellow writer so I have a pretty vivid imagination even in my 30s. I wonder if this happens more to people who are creative/have big imaginations
Great question, yes I do, and I've privately wondered that same thing.
I had the exact same thing. Only when I closed my eyes, you described exactly what I was seeing. For hours all night long. Eventually I just gave up and watched it like a movie. The most demonic scenes I’ve ever seen!!!
@@donengland9140 Yeah I didn't mention it but that's what I did too, I just kind of... watched it.
Thanks for the comment!
This is heartbreaking. Thank you for your story. I’m so happy you are well now. I have only had shakes/vomiting and small amounts of audio. I would hear some light music and some times a door bell. I knew I was in big trouble and stopped. I pray for every one going through a rough time. The devil is real. Evil. May everyone receive blessings ❤
I’m in the same way, much love and strength for you!
I've been through alcohol withdrawl a few times. I'm not sure if God is real, but I'm sure as heck the Devil exists purely because of my withdrawl experiences.
Very powerful video. There are indeed very few first-hand accounts of DTs on the internet.
Hope you can post more videos about withdrawal and about leading a sober life. 👍🏽
Thanks Peter! The response to this video has been so positive that I will definitely be posting more on this subject.
@@_BatCountry Yup, just saw and shared your most recent video. This stuff is gold! Should be part of addiction education in schools.
@@_BatCountryHi Trying to learn more about this. What does the acronym DT stand for?
POWERFUL VIDEO!!!! Y’all listen up!!! Salute to you my friend!
Thanks Slayer, that means a lot, I'm a fan of your channel too.
@@_BatCountry that is awesome bro, keep up the good work, I binged like 7 of your videos earlier lol, can definitely relate to a lot of what you say. Thanks brother, have a great day 💯✌🏻
Thank you so much for this! ❤ i have never reached the full blown visual hallucinations, but am beyond fascinatef by these stories. Its almost like you can feel your actual soul being damaged. I experienced insane scenes of bloody piles of bodies having sex in bath of blood whenever i closed my eyes. And a loud rumble that overtook everything like a jet engine or a tibetan horn. I also had a dream (or hallucination maybe) that i levitated out of my bed and floated into the hallway and this evil presence and the deep rumble just was all around me. Its so surreal how this stuff borders into spirituality and how similar and carnal the images are. Best to you man and really appreciate this incredible story.
It's crazy how similar our stories are.
I was going through really bad DTs and was convinced there was a drone flying over my apartment beaming voices into my head. They started off as whispers at first just like this guy says. I slowly began to be able to pick out words and distinct voices. At first it sounded like an ex's friend who works for a government research facility. I thought they were fucking with me for some reason, it got so bad that I messaged my ex who I hadn't spoken to in about a year, "Can you please tell your friends to stop fucking with me? They're really hurting me and I just want it to stop".
Then the voices revealed they were actually teenagers who lived nearby and bought this cool drone attachment online. There were three or four of them. I was tortured by it for 3 sleepless days, whenever I tried to lay down I thought they were blasting incredibly loud concert level music into my brain. Lots of laughing at my expense, bringing up past mistakes and pains and insecurities only I could have possibly known about. I pleaded with them to stop and they said not until you die of sleep deprivation or kill yourself. They eventually told me they would stop if I drove to a certain location. They gave me an address in my mind and I wrote it down. I put it into my phone and followed the directions. 15 minutes later I found myself at the address of an old part-time job I had 5-6 years before. I waited for instructions, the voices laughed and called me a dumbass. Crazy how the unconscious/subconscious brain can remember things like that. If someone asked me the address to that place I would have no idea what it was.
It was really intense and getting more intense. I could hear full conversations and was having them back. They talked about stuff like adjusting the calibration or turning up the power when the voices got quiet. Really weird shit. It got so bad I ordered one of those silver-lined hoods that supposedly block EMF and cell towers. Didn't help because the voices were all in my head from the DTs not from some drone or government 5G towers or whatever conspiracy theory I probably read an article about once and my brain stored. I drove around the neighborhood looking for people in back yards with controllers in their hands and everything, I was ready to beat the shit out of them.
Several times I went outside to look for this drone and kept seeing it just dipping over the other side of the apartment. Once I saw it speed off in a direction then zoom off at a right angle somewhere else and circle around like they didn't want me to know where they were located. I saw bright flashes of light from electrical sockets, moving shadows, could feel footsteps on my bed or someone yanking on my foot. Once I felt something stab me and lurched out of bed because it hurt so bad. I turned on the lights to check for blood but there was nothing there.
It went from teenagers to the government to demons. All the messages were extremely threatening, the closed eye visions were of unimaginable gore and terrible sexual depravity. The demonic stuff was most certainly the worst, that was towards the end. Very creative ways of torture and what not I still don't particularly like talking about so I'll keep that part short.
I don't know how long it lasted all I know is that I ordered the hood on the 3rd day, it came 4 days later, and it kept going for a few days after that. I'm sure my complete lack of sleep didn't help with the audio/visual hallucinations. I'm also sure I made everything worse by trying to drink just a little bit when it got too bad to make everything go away. That didn't work at all and just prolonged my torture.
I can assure people reading this I have no history of mental illness but those DTs and 10(?) nights with just a few minute microsleeps while I was still conscious turned me absolutely temporarily insane. When it was all finally subsiding that's when my dumbass finally checked into a detox center. I definitely should have gone in sooner.
Wow that really is VERY similar to my experience. I could go point by point like "yep same thing, yep same thing." Thank you so much for sharing that - as scary as it is, it's really useful that we talk about this stuff because there's some comfort in knowing other rational people have experienced it too.
That detail about being given an address that was already lodged somewhere in your subconscious or memory: that's what makes me feel like these things are more like waking dreams (or nightmares) than the actual hallucinations you get from, say, a bad acid trip or something.
And that bit that you don't really want to talk about? The violence and sexual depravity? I had that too, constantly, with elaborate torture traps and stuff. I don't tell people about that part because I worry what it says about me as a person, but there's some relief in knowing that that's actually really common, but people (including me) are scared of revealing it.
Thanks again.
I think I was so sleep deprived my mind forced me to enter REM sleep while I was awake. It was absolutely terrifying. Luckily I'm doing better now. I've always been a very rational person and don't have a history of mental illness of anything like that. No drug abuse either, I stay away from that sort of thing because I know it'd be too easy to fall into that trap.
It was honestly the most terrifying experience of my life. And I agree, the violence and sexual depravity part with the torture traps isn't something I'll likely ever tell anyone about. I know it had to come from inside my head somewhere, and what would that say about me as a person? I think the dark places in our hearts come out at the worst moments.
We're not bad people at all, for instance I have a lot of love in my heart to give and I would never intentionally hurt someone unless it was in self defense. It was just horrific and I never wish to experience anything like that again.@@_BatCountry
Dude. Wow. What an unexplainable terrifying experience. Our stories are extremely similar, I could write a short book on the whole experience it was nuts, I can't even begin to type it. The different levels and storylines I was flipping through hallucination wise was unreal. Very demonic. Very scary. I wouldn't wish it upon my worst enemy to go through that haha it was NUTSSSS, wild how creative it got. And yeah all starting with people from my past outside my windows talking horribly about me and then it spiraling into a whole wild series of themed hallucinations that seemed straight out of a movie. Your completely sucked into it and have no idea that they are actually hallucinations.
And yes, to both of you the "don't talk about" parts about it, same. Horrible and terrifying and I can't believe my brain produced this experience.so wild.
I honestly think it's more than just our brains making the stuff up and we tap into some spiritual realm with entities that know who we are and all of our past and bad things we have done
Hi friend, I'm here from your link from r/stopdrinking. I've had absolutely horrible alcohol withdrawal hallucinations... and white knuckled then all at home. Easily the fucking most stupid, dangerous thing I've ever fucking done. I should be dead. I'm now 20 days sober, and this will be the final time I have to GET sober.
Thank you so much for sharing your experience and sharing such personal things. It is sincerely appreciated.
Sending you positive, healthy vibes.
Hey Daisy, and welcome from Reddit. I might politely encourage you to commit your experiences with hallucinations to video - I know that's a scary prospect, but if there's one thing I've learned from the comments on this video, people want to know what it's like and there are very few people talking openly about it.
Congrats on your 20 days, that's the hardest bit done with. I wish you nothing but the best, and feel free to check in from time to time with updates.
All the very best. ❤
i had full dt's, i thought the tv show i was watching was talking to me, i was having full on conversations, i couldnt sleep or even keep water down, i was hearing full symphonies and could control them like a conducter, i was hallucinating , a tree stump would become a dog, i saw demons, horrible creatures in pain, felt as if i was being cut, squeezed, it was literally hell. i was eventually 5150. that was a whole other experience.
Well, I'm glad you made it out buddy. A Lot of people don't.
as somebody who tripped a lot - i was very very aware that i was hallucinating, but the fact that it was due to my alcoholism was news to me. i figured i was having "flashbacks" the very first time. the second time it happened i stopped drinking i put two and two together. i was like ohhhh so thats whats happening. after two nights no sleep and sweating, it usually subsides. i do it cold turkey, probably not smart - i dont think i could do it one more time. wish me luck mate
Delirium is nothing like tripping!! When one is delirius they can't distinguish reality from hallucinations.
Taper the drinks off ... If you stop cold turkey you can lose your life
@@slickone777 tapering is hard dude. Because once I drink sometimes I want one more. I'm currently tapered to 6 beers
@@Andy101-tm3hz you can do it bro.. I'm down to a shot and a tall can a day
From one Jack Torrance to another, glad we got out of there alive.
Me too brother, me too.
This is exactly why alcoholics have a tendency to turn to God. Everything you described can easily be attributed to demons who are tormenting you. I am agnostic, but when I see stuff like this over and over it makes you think.
I suspect you might be right, I think a lot of people are tempted to believe that they've punctured through some sort of veil of consciousness and seen something spiritual. That's not my own interpretation, but when I understand why people feel that way.
At some point you can only describe reality in religious terms. Are demons real? If you see them and hear them and are forced to face them to become free of them the realness of it becomes a construct. They simply are whether your understanding of them as a part of your mind or as a spiritual thing becomes irrelevant when you actually understand them.
If anyone reading this is thinking about quitting cold turkey, please go to the ER and ask for a medical detox. Ideally one where therapy and educational groups are included. I got lucky and found a program with other alcoholics/addicts. We do group therapy and attend meetings. I’m now transitioning into a PHP and then IOP. Recovery is more than simply abstaining from alcohol. Recovery is learning to cope with life and building a life you don’t want to escape from.
Very well said, thank you, and good luck on your recovery.
Everything thing you have said happened to me too. Everything and even more. It was by far the worst time of my life. I'm surprised I'm still alive. Thanks for sharing,. I feel relieved.
Glad you made it through.
Thank you so much for ths video. I have seen those faces too after drinking heavily. I thought i was inssne. Its comforting to know im not the only one
Perhaps the most vivid hallucination i ever had with the DTs was seeing thousands of soap bubbles floating around in the living room. i was even touching them and popping them, feeling the wetness on my fingers. Instead of thinking I was hallucinating, all I could do was try to figure out where they came from.. It's like a profound state of confusion, where you just have no idea what's real and what's not.
Also I've had the visions of mangled faces too. And I've seen demons standing in my room etc.. Yes, it's the ultimate horror show. Absolute stark terror. Like being in the 6th or 7th circles of Pandemonium.
It is, these experiences will always stay with me.
I'm afraid to say that the woman you saw emerge from the jacket was 'Lilith.' This excerpt from the Bablylonian Talmud sheds light on this: “It is forbidden to sleep in a house alone, and whoever sleeps in a house alone, a lilith seizes him.” Also, regarding the watery nature of your hallucination, there is this excerpt: . 'While by the Red Sea Lilith became a lover to demons and producing 100 babies a day. The angels said that God would take these demon children away from her unless she returned to Adam. When she did not return, she was punished accordingly.'
Clearly delirium tremens opens up a portal to something deeply unpleasant.
100 babies a day, huh? Seems a bit excessive.
@@_BatCountry Hi I've subbed by the way because it's a good channel. Currently trying to quit alcohol for good.
@@jakezywek6852 thanks! It's good to have you here
I'm halfway through and need a break…I’m up to Bat part.
this has been giving me chills the whole way man.
Getting chills up my spine hearing how someone else has had people walking around the bed talking… footsteps on the covers, indescribable animals - mine were a mix of the most evil alien/reptiles you can imagine, gruesome, fast and violent beyond words. I remember looking online in 2022 and there was nothing like this video available at all, one of the best I’ve seen on DTs.
True what you say about being in the mind, because I’d close my eyes and still be seeing the same evil demonic entities. just the ferocity of them for fkng hours.
But my question is this - I wonder why don’t we ever get nice DTs? Why are they all terrifying?
More chills as I finished that off, e.g. hearing about the perfect musical unfolding before you. I was scripting and in a movie live as it unfolded with real characters that were developing as well, I was able to create and alter scenes on the fly.
Hearing too about flickering in the corner of your eye, I had that while watching this a few times on the floor beside me, and the rush of adrenaline
In fact even the music playing low in the background of your videos brings back memories of DTs. I’d block my ears..but of course the music was still playing.
So much I can relate to here…nice to know there’s a few of us out there!
In turn I wonder about the brain damage, (and also of course the deaths from DTs)….perhaps that’s affected people ability to communicate their experiences as you have. I wonder how long it took for you to become this eloquent. I’m sure as you know, some people in the rooms at the extreme end can barely speak.
I wonder if these hallucinations relate to DNA memories - things that scared our ancestors, because I’m sure these aren’t memories and things I’ve ever seen before.
Before my last ones kicked off in April….I was video calling someone for solace as I knew what was about to happen if I hadn’t weened right…and behind the laptop behind video call was a dimly lit white wall, my brain / eyes were like a projector rapidly shooting out some insane frantic relentless movie on fast forward. That’s when I really started to realise that these were all in my mind.
But I’ll never know what’s creating them, or driving them with such ferocity.
This comment partially inspired the video I'm uploading right now, where I hallucinated a puppy. Very good point.
Some of the things he’s describing is experienced during sleep paralysis, you feel something touching you and talking to you as if it’s real , I’ve had it since childhood with no drinking or substances. But awake like he’s describing sounds terrifying
I instantly subbed, some say thats why liquors are called spirits and we were visited by demons. I was in jail before i went to the ICU(i already put this comment but it disappeared) and i had DTs and heroin withdrawal at the same time and i was in a anti suicide smok in jail. Well across from my cell there was a room with little people and music playing in it and i thought to myself the jail had a rec room for activities. But then the music started sounded evil and they were singing about me, almost chanting, and I thought to myself wait why would the jail have a room across from my cell with little people singing about me? And i looked over and the room was red and they were grey midgets with tiny wings and the sounds i heard are hard to describe but they were chanting you're coming with us and it was the most horrifying thing I have ever seen and i started screaming and had a seizure and i woke up in the ICU, its hard for me to type this, the weird thing is I was arrested on halloween which happens to be my birthday. I was in the jail for 3 days the first day i saw them in the morning and the last time was at 3am which is the witching hour, i am convinced i was being tormented from hell and I haven't touched a drop of anything for 9 years. I saw other things that i cant even begin to describe, the music though was so evil and about my life, i get goosebumps just thinking about it
Hey mate. Sorry your comment disappeared, I remember seeing it but it was gone before I could reply. Believe me, I wouldn't delete it, and you're not the only one it's happened to.
That experience sounds absolutely terrifying, a real wake up call. Congrats on your sober time, and I'm happy to see you're still checking in with sober content after all that time.
Thanks for contributing mate, we all appreciate it.
@@_BatCountry thanks, yea TH-cam just deletes comments when they want. But yea ive been on opiates Heroin, oxys, and suboxone for 27 years, but was also drinking tons of liquor and beer. Suboxone saved me from the opiates and OD. But going through both the alcohol and opiate withdrawal in jail and ICU was absolute hell, idk how im still alive, i can still hear the evil music and dwarf creatures they are burned into my brain, and there were different evil songs and they all had lyrics about my life and my wife and my daughters, it was like a whole album replaying on repeat in my head with very and then the bugs and snakes climbing the walls. Oh I also yelled and swore at the guards to turn that f cking music off lol, i was not well and they moved me to ICU then rehab for 4 months. But really loving the channel, im still in treatment and see a counselor and will probably always be in treatment, thanks 🙏
@@_BatCountry yea TH-cam randomly deletes and think it happened again
Fascinating. Thank you I am always looking for stories on the DT’s
They are horrible…
My experience with them was very scary and even had them outside in public places and saw shadow people etc…
Its no lie…
I was really fucked up one time
@@stuartcumings8026 I was put on Beta Blockers for blood pressure and headaches which in itself causes nightmares and stopping drinking makes it even worse…it’s insane
Found myself re watching this with renewed horror. It sounds almost like the opening of a portal to a nightmare realm adjacent to ours.
Hey John, good to see you back here. Yep, it's like the movie Event Horizon.
@@_BatCountry that scene where Sam Neil turns to face the camera after some work done on his eyes is a corker. Never got the low reviews. Classic
Oh wow I've never heard anyone else talk about the long, coherent, rhyming narratives! I actually enjoyed this part - I saw expertly produced tv and movies in my head, my mind was so much more powerful than I knew, and I could conjure anyone alive or dead, real, or fictional and they were perfectly articulate. I knew they weren't there but marveled at how I could 'generate' such a convincing facsimile of their presence. I conjured my dead mom, and a girlfriend I missed dearly and spent time with them. My imagination was like bluray compared to 1920s film. I saw bugs and faces, and very grotesque sexual and violent scenes, felt little devils walking on my bed and tapping me, and heard voices and music for over a week. It was very unpleasant but I wasn't afraid. I knew what was happening, and although not particularly religious, felt secure in knowing God was protecting me. I just prayed it would end and never want to be there again, but it was a very valuable experience for me. Sounds like you took it up a few notches from where I was though! So bizarre. So hard to find someone that doesn't give you that face when you try to tell them about it.
Ya know what's weird? Having seen what my mind has the capacity to do, how inventive it can be, I find it a bit deflating that I can't harness that kind of creativity in sobriety. Getting shitfaced again is obviously not a good way to access that state, but I wish there was a way I could tap into it occasionally.
@@_BatCountry When the delirium started to die down I was mildly disappointed that my mind's eye was returning to 'standard def' and all my imaginary friends were fading. During the high def imagination, I could still also see my regular mind's eye, so dim, such a small screen with vague fleeting details. The HD mind was able to conjure and hold and examine any image or idea. I still wonder if I tapped into something bigger than myself. When I saw demons I would just look away. I was so cocky, "You can't touch me :P" like a kid walking past bullies with his dad.
i've had vivid nightmares in withdrawal periods, and I thought I'd had it bad...those hallucinations sound horrifying. i will say though, my experience had one thing in common with yours - it exploits your insecurities
This is my story. Finally. Someone else knows. Where can I got to talk about these things?
I drank a bottle of Jack y everyday for 2years When I stoped I would shake violently the only way that would 🛑 would be to drink! I started helusinating talking to people that weren't there,then I stay hearing voices Very Scary I thought I was going crazy I used to think meth was the but Alcohol is the worst drug I have ever seen
What’s with the odd background track on this one? Great video man you’re incredibly articulate. I was absolutely gripped listening to this.
Thank you! And yeah, good spot with the music - I took some music from the 40s and 50s and slowed it down to 70% to make it feel a bit more... unsettling.
Been sober 2 weeks and I deep cleaned my entire house and washed my sheets and blankets. Things I never did when I was drinking.
Congrats! The first clean bed in sobriety is like luxury, right?
Your Honesty is refreshing it's videos like this that helps Me. It's been 15 years since I gave up Drinking But everyone in my family drinks So this helps in my moments of Weakness ❤.😅
Demonic
I agree
I’m glad I found your page I thought I was alone for years
Welcome buddy.
You have a link to speak
Talking to my family and friends about how serious this disease is
WOW ty brother for sharing ,,i have been there too its the worst feeling a person can exprience ,,all things bad all at a time ,,,wow just cant imagine ,,,
I saw the twins from The Shining at my bedroom window playing a music box,scary stuff!
oof yeah, that'll stay with you.
This is simply horrifying, I’ve gotta say I’ve had convincing hallucinations from ketamine that scared me but this makes me glad I’ve stayed away from hard alcohol. I commend you being able to stay sober through all that, I know with my own addictions my brain would remind me what would make the discomfort stop. It’s surprising that your mind didn’t see alcohol as a means to stop the hallucinations
Yeah that's a really good point - these hallucinations don't "feel" like hallucinogenic hallucinations. It's really hard to explain. And yeah, powering through that period without reaching for another bottle to kill the visualisations is HARD. Thanks for the comment!
Actually, once the DT's have begun nothing can stop the hallucinations, even hitting the bottle again won't work. Drugs can help to reduce the chance of seizure and death but the other symptoms just have to run their course.
@@_BatCountry I second that…when the hallucinations start…in back of your mind…you know even just a sip of alcohol would make it stop…but then it’s like pushing the “RESET” button…and now you have to start over…
This is giving me real anxiety remembering how bad my hallucinations where,absolutely terrorfying. I sat in a bus shelter for 2 nights after running out of my house in fear.it was like I was living in a mad insane terrorfying alternative realty ,but I was awake .it got so bad I started to think I had gone mad and the only way to stop this was to kill myself. I needed this timely reminder. 3 months since my last drink.
when i go through withdrawel i get 2 types of "dreams" you can hardly call them dreams cause your not actually sleeping, your are just passed out.
the first type is like that are people are trying to intervent my alcholism, everybody is very cheerful and supporting, everyones clapps for me when i stay sober and it has an happy ending this type is so devasting cause when you "wake up" you realize that now your life is still in shambles.
the second type is like really brutal stuff, i dont know how my brain comes up with this i personally dont enjoy horror movies because im a big softy when it comes to fiction, it seems like my own mind is trying to torment me for drinking. i had this dream that i was playing with i thought was a toy version of my own Cat that i had for like 15 years and i played with this toy very roughly, swinging it around by the limbs. it turned out this was not a toy it was my real cat and by playing with it, i broke her limbs and she looked at me with almost teary eyes that said "i dont know why you done this to me, but i still love you" and in my "dream" i had a mental breakdown because i couldnt believe what ive done to my beloved cat. i woke up drenched in sweat, puked into my toilet, i was so distressed that i cleaned my kitchen to distract myselfe from the horrors of that dream but i started to break down and cry over the horrible images several times during cleaning my kitchen. and if this sounds maniac to you, you are right, this is mania in its purest form.
alcohol is the worst thing ever, its pure poisen by definition, it destroys lives but now im stuck with it and i dont think that i can quit it.
You're not alone in those terrifying visualisations. They truly make you wonder if you are a bad person. Thanks for sharing this honesty, more people need to know about it.
Yes Ive dealt with it. People need to be aware
I’m having dreams while wide awake, out of bed. I haven’t been drinking this week at all and I guess this is withdrawal? Like I get tingling all over, mostly in my butt cheeks (weird, I know, but that’s how I know something is wrong) then it’s like I’m dreaming about something, I get lightheaded and can’t figure out if I’m asleep or not even though I know it’s not a dream. It’s scary as heck. Nothing terrible happens in the dream or getting out of it. I don’t know why this is happening except that I’m not drinking every day anymore. If I drink beer (I rarely drink liquor) as mundane as these weird waking dreams are, I’m terrified to quit drinking, terrified to keep drinking. And yeah, I hear audio hallucinations as well. I always assumed they were from my neighbors. Thank you for putting this out there. I know I have a problem. I gotta try to figure out how to get better.
How many beers do you drink a day ?
I had something very close to this but I was not drinking. I got a severe case of covid last November. What I can tell you is that my head felt swollen. My brain was burning severely. I started hallucinating 2 weeks into it. I started seeing figures walking around me. I heard voices when I laid in bed at night telling me to do self harm. There was a few times when I would walk into my house and hear a full conversation of people talking. I expected a group of my family there. the house was completely empty. I have been left with extreme ptsd from this whole thing. I also encountered disfigured faces especially when try to close my eyes at night. Images of peoples eyes coming out of there head, demonic faces, things that no human should ever even see and things I didn't think my own mind was capable of doing.
I quit the drank last year and I do not miss it. Even a bit of chilled vodka (which I wasn’t accustomed to b/c I’d never wait for it to get cold) is enough to make me feel sick and ashamed. So glad I never got into those deep withdrawal symptoms. It honestly shouldn’t even be legal let alone as widely available as it is and marketed how they do.
Glad I found you ,
Thankyou sir, from wales uk
bole da cariad, welcome to the channel :)
@@_BatCountry how sweet xx thankyou
This is the best thank you
Thanks Barbara!
Those two you saw, I had a similar experience .... I thought my two platinum blondes were angels, and that I'd died. Totally convinced. You're right, I struggle to believe my own perceptions even now.
Bro hallucinated the woodland version of the handmaid’s tale
You're right. I studied The Handmaid's Tale at university, it had a big impact on me, and I've got no doubt it influenced this hallucination.
The first time I quit cold turkey after 14 years of drinking a entire bottle or liter of vodka a day. On the 2nd or 3rd day I started having auditory hallucinations. At 2 am in the morning. I was by myself in San Francisco, while my bf at the time was on a work trip. I kind of knew it wasn't real at first, but then I kept slipping in and out of what I believed was real and what wasn't. The visual hallucinations started later on during this whole ordeal. Idk how many times I called the police on myself and the neighbors also. I even told the police I had a rifle and this california! But they never took me away to get treated by a DR or anything. And I was saying and believing the craziest shit ever. I eventually ran away from our apartment and disappeared for 2 days with no money, phone or ID on me. I woke up on a park bench and walked back home. I was welcomed by the police since I was filed as a missing person. I told them what I thought happened to me and they let me go on living. It was lasted about 5 days. Only took 6 more years to finally quit after that experience though 😅.
I remember withdrawal where i could see closed eye visuals at night. Faces morphing. Hands shaky. I could hear melodies in my head looping over and over. I had white noise earbuds on as a distraction and its as if i could hear vague commotion from the room next to mine, the insomnia too. Second day was uncomfortable, But a bit better. 3rd day a little better, and them boom!
Seizure! 😢
Wow. Yeah that's a familiar story, it can hit you hard just when you're starting to think it's getting better. Glad you made it out buddy!
At 29 minutes brought back my horrific experience. I was so scared every night. It was awful.
I'm sorry if this was uncomfortable to listen to Angela, but I'm glad that you got through it.
Yeah I came off benzos and alcohol and I kept seeing shadow people, hearing sirens, my mom calling me. I thought friends and family were with me. I saw people hanging in my closet. It happens everytime I relapse now.
The first full day and night of withdrawal, everytime I closed my eyes I saw terrifying, disfigured faces. I tried to imagine other things and was shown grotesque machines which started as seemingly normal objects and flashed into horrifying imagery. The tremors were annoying too. I also got audio hallucinations, I was recently arrested and coukd always hear faint sirens in the distance. Was camping in a forest at the time and would make out dark figures once the sun set. I'm only 24, am homeless and this was a week ago.
You saw the faces too, huh? I also saw machines, weird, partially organic things leaking dark blood. You ever had a serious head injury by the way? I did, and the other guy I spoke to who saw faces also had a head injury.
.
@@_BatCountry glad to know I'm not the only one aha. I was involved in a car crash in which I was knocked unconscious. Perhaps that played a part but I can't see how they'd link up...
@@asdfghjvrty I don't know how either, but some of the other people I've read about or spoken too who've seen faces in particular have also had head injuries.
I had all these numerous time each one was scary
What was said in the into is 100% true. I smoked some laced weed back when I was 15 & absolutely thought I was going to be schizophrenic during & afterwards. I would work myself into panic attacks just by looking in the corner of my room in the dark convinced that there was something there. It took months, maybe even years, for me to regain my composure. I lost all of my HS years due to it. That was a decade ago.
I can feel the panic creep in if I stay up for a day. I can catch myself most times, but there are moments where I wake up sweaty with my heartbeat racing that makes me think that's the day I lose my mind.
All that had led to me abusing alcohol. I'm more of a binge drinker & that's how it all starts. Videos like these remind me of how slippery that slope is & how hard I worked on making it back to my former self.
Hope everyone the best. It's a tough time, but it does get easier to manage.
It's scary how an experience like that, so long ago, can still bleed into our everyday lives. Thanks for the positive thoughts and encouragement!
"Fairies wear boots, ya gotta believe me... Son, son, you've gone too far..."
The people in your home really resonated. It happened to me twice. I stood at the top of the stairs and looked down to see someone standing at the bottom. I ran and hid in my bedroom. Another time, I called my poor mother and told her people were having a party in my house and I just wanted them to stop. Thankfully, she called an ambulance and got me help. I always hallucinated while drinking and had no idea it was happening.
Hey Chris! Thanks for the response. I hope you don't mind me asking and you have no obligation to answer, but have you ever suffered a head injury of any kind that you're aware of?
@@_BatCountryI have. I had a stroke not related to drinking and had brain surgery. I have Epilepsy. When you mentioned the "prickles", I feel those before every seizure. I've felt that awful doom and panic. Thanks so much for this video.
and to add to my other story, i now drank half a bottle of vodka and can finally sit on my computer again.
today this morning i just laid in bed like a corpse for like 8 hours and ofc i couldnt sleep i just heard my roomate rummiging through his room and for a moment i couldnt comprehent what time was, i felt like my personality was splitting away from me into a void. I also later got the feeling that i had two personalities existing at the same time, i got up later that day to rush into the supermarked to buy this bottle of vodka because i couldnt believe a human can feel like this.
im hiding away from my roomate, so my room is now filled with piss filled bottles and trash (im normally very tidy) and like 10 empty bottles of vodka and beer cans, i havent showered for a week and i know i look and smell terrible (and because of the withrawel from alcohol, the brains yanked to 200% and everything smells and tastes even worse). i love plants and i have like 15 in my room i see they are dying and loosing their leaves (i have a great bonsai for 4 years that is now withering and dying cause if been drinking for weeks) in the last 3 months i lost 20 kilo, im now at 68 Kilo cause i had a diet and i was jogging 3-4 times a week, i even joined a 5K run and made it with 25 minutes. in that same time i got an home office job that paid what i wanted that ive now lost too. its all gone now. and while laying in bed these thoughts constantly went through my head making me more miserable, making me loosing faith in any future. i need to pay rent and i dont know how to do it, i lost the faith in me to act like a function human being.
my brother came to visit my roomate, we share friends and im terrified that he sees me like this. and i hear them laugh and talk and it drives me insane. thats the state you get in when drinking, you become an asocial monster. it changes me into another person like in Jekyll & Hyde. im not ashamed of this i did nothing wrong to other people but me, but im very afraid of myselfe and i dont want other people to pull my weight.
How are you doing right now?
@@_BatCountry thank you for the quick response, im sitting at my computer eating ramen, the last drink was about 3 hours ago and i just try to prepare for impact.
@@Takethislife9 Any chance you can get your ass to a hospital? I know that's a big step, but I'm just telling you, from experience, it's easier than going through what I described in this video.
@@_BatCountry thats not an option for me, i will wait till morning when some store opens to buy booze and then i can act again.
So much I can relate here. For I it was figures coming in between doors where there was a little bit of light coming through.
I appreciate you and how you explained this. Its closest to how I understand what happened when I went through this
Thank you. Your experience seems consistent with a lot of others that I've read, and with my own. It's interesting to me that alcoholic hallucinations seem to provoke very similar visualisations across cultures and backgrounds.
My hallucinations were like fuzzy tracers shooting across the floor... I did have a few shocking mental/audio-visual visions in the dark where I see something in my peripheral and turn to look and saw a woman staring at me about a foot from me. That was chilling.
It's scary stuff isn't it, how our own minds can deceive us like that?
@@_BatCountryyup
Ive gone on drinking binges longer than 3 days and done some white powdery substances. I remember when the buzz would go away i would start seeing shadow people, spiders on my arms, random flashes and voices in my ear.
Going through it now!
Hang in there mate. Any chance you can get to a hospital? Trust me, it's better than riding it out alone.
Keep us posted.
Nice job with that low volume music in the background
Thanks Clay! I hope it gave it a slightly surreal, vaguely unsettling feeling.
Nailed it
@@_BatCountryit certainly does, I turned my phone down to be sure it was coming from phone.
@@leetarrant5630 Sorry about that. Kind of.
I had them that bad one time i still was having them still 2 weeks after stopping drinking…
Had seizures as well in the past…
Its the neurotransmitters being messed up by alcohol with hallucinations
Im fascinated by this .. iv been having very heavy drink binges... lasting up to two weeks. Id like to find the link to your book.. but cant find it! Can u pls send it me please? Many thanks 😊
Hey Melissa! Here's the link... www.amazon.com/-/en/Stu-Nugent-ebook/dp/B09SY4K17P
Detox with help.
Thankyou so much I'm going to order it!
Sounds like Hell to me. No wonder we need a higher power. I wonder whether it opens doors.
I've had mild hallucinations when I'm hungover I think. I've had that 'shoulder tapping' thing before but I think it's a twitching nerve and our brain perceives it as being someone tapping us on the shoulder. So things are happening in our bodies (like your punch in the heart by that woman when really you might have been near a heart attack). I would also hear music so loud in my mind that it felt like I had ear buds in, but it wouldn't be a full song it would be a verse and the chorus on repeat non stop. I would also close my eyes and basically be watching television, I could see images on the insides of my eyelids.
Your hangover must be pretty bad: what you're describing is exactly what the early stages of either alcoholic hallucinosis or delirium tremens feels like. That fragmentary music in particular, that's a major feature of alcoholic hallucinosis. The closed-eye hallucinations, like your brain is streaming a movie and you have very limited control, that's part of it too. I would be whooshing through landscapes and stuff, or seeing weird architecture, quite often I can't stop it, I see it over and over again.
I think it's fair to say you've been really close to a very horrible experience. It speaks to your other comment though, about why hallucinations happen, why they're similar, and what they are. I hinted at having my own unscientific theories - in my experience, the hallucinations behave in some ways like dreams. Real stimuli, like a twitching nerve, in interpreted as a tap on the shoulder and so on. That's dream language, that's what dreams do. I feel like alcoholic hallucinosis and delirium tremens move the threshold between consciousness and sleep in some way, and the confusing, surreal, impossible properties of a dream can cross over and become experienced in wakefulness. The fear in DTs is very much like dream fear, for example.
Possibly related: have you ever had a head injury?
Wow. 🙏❤️
Ive use almost all party chemicals but i can agree that my alcohol withdrawal was mor real when it was so fake. No one who has not went through it has no idea. Im still trying to understand what happened in those 2 weeks in the ICU.
Im definitely a different person after 5 and a half days of medical induced coma
I feel you, I don't feel the same as I was before either.
I've been through the depths of Hell, during my alcohol withdrawals. I consider anyone who has been there, and through a battle buddy.
Would you care to explain a little more about medically induced coma? And, why does someone have to be during their withdrawal?
I have been on the hospital bed a few times, at death's door for withdrawal and DT'S. I just wonder why they didn't put me in coma as well. I was in bad shape.
Anyway, hope you are doing well. God Bless
@@jdmbeats when they chose to intabate they administer different meds in order to basically put you to sleep like surgery but for multiple days. They do this to limit outside imput and reduce additional seizures. So that's advanced life support in a nutshell.
I am now a week away from having 5 months sober, and I thank God, the doctors, and the great nurses that put up with my insanity. Thanks for asking. And I totally agree with you. Especially when the statistics are 1in 5 or 1 in 7 that go to the ICU for alcohol withdrawal will not walk out the door.
The major reason why I was put into a coma was to protect my airway. A machine is breathing for you
@@jdmbeats God bless and fight the good fight. Life is worth it
@@CannaGro81 Thanks for explaining, and I'm glad to hear of your recovery! Congratulations on your upcoming 5 months, that's awesome! It takes a lot of hardwork, and dedication to get there. Keep going bro, God is Good 🙏
Take Care and, God Bless 🙏
Them withdrawal hallucinations are terrifying I can say I've withdrawal from both booze and opiates and they are identical and from psychosis also . The booze though had tactile hallucinations which was the worst of the worst cause that's the point we're you start getting confused cause you can't understand what's going on . The most profound hallucinations I've ever had were from sleep meds like zopiclone or lunesta but they were euphoric unlike booze and opiates
I've never had D.Ts but I'm sure I came close. I was never a spirit drinker but I drank wine to blackout stage.
I got into trouble with the law and lost my licence a bunch of times.. I'm getting older and knew that I had to stop before it's too late.
Luckily I was able to stop by cutting down then just went cold turkey on a date that I picked.
I've lost allot of my confidence since I was drinking for some reason but don't miss drinking at all. 11 months sober and hardly even think about it and never want to drink again.
Congrats on your time buddy!
@@_BatCountry Yeah ta bro, same to you...
I had auditory ones, where I think people are calling me weird. Not nice
Very very not nice. Hope you're doing ok now though.
DTs are literally traumatizing
Absolutely.
That different kind of fear,id call it terror,totally understand the theory about people dying in DT,S due to fear.heart attack
Yeah it's unlike any other experience.
Me in the beginnig: Our stores are very similar..... 10 minutes later: Nope, you won.....
All kidding aside. It is horrible and the auditory part is basically the same as my 2 episodes. I was hearing music, talking(evil and downgrading) and wispering, mosquitos and other stuff. The visual part was not so bad, mostly shadows.
Luckily i went to the doctor and he knocked me out with some benzos...
4 months sober....
It's pretty awful. I only had one cold turkey withdrawal that I rode out until the end. Kindling your brain doesn't help future withdrawals either. I did my own video on that too.