MANIPULATE A NARCISSIST!? (CAN YOU EVEN DO THAT?) YES!

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 21 ธ.ค. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 111

  • @triplekids3
    @triplekids3 3 ปีที่แล้ว +63

    I don’t have to deal with that shit anymore I left my narc husband 4 months ago finally finding my peace and freedom

    • @tijafication
      @tijafication 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I can feel your happiness 💙 best wishes for your new journey.

    • @godzillamanstreb524
      @godzillamanstreb524 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Yay ‼️💖💖

    • @noteworthy4247
      @noteworthy4247 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      May your new road be blessed ❤🙏❤

  • @garycordle5295
    @garycordle5295 3 ปีที่แล้ว +58

    Don't play there games with them, just go silent period, make them think,act like nothing never happened, don't be like them at all, just walking away and going no contact will fck them up, and they know what they are,there damaged,you want respect from these toxic devil's,go no contact and leave them alone, there cover will be blown up,go on with your life, find stuff to do that makes you happy.

    • @babyblue8214
      @babyblue8214 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      good luck with that If you work with them! i have 2 women right now trying to sabotage me because i havent talked to them in months!

    • @mikemcternan8249
      @mikemcternan8249 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Im acting as if nothing has happened and keeping quiet. Shes very aware of it and cant think why Ive been no contact The flying monkeys have been hooving me to get the run down. Ive made no comments about the situation and my feelings and thats confused them. Just general chit chat.
      I am pleasant and friendly to them without revealing my hand.
      Have to say I just love it because they are confused.
      Its a bit like playing poker🤣🤔

  • @mrgabagoo8905
    @mrgabagoo8905 3 ปีที่แล้ว +32

    I just keep them pissed off so they dont try bothering me any further then the hoover.... Always tell them the truth about themselves they run

    • @godzillamanstreb524
      @godzillamanstreb524 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      You’re courageous!🌟🌟

    • @mrgabagoo8905
      @mrgabagoo8905 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@godzillamanstreb524 my parents my kids mother and some of my friends are narcs. My best advice is if you live with a narc your best bet is to keep silent but once you get away. The truth really hurts them and if you know how to touch their triggers it becomes a fair game

    • @mrgabagoo8905
      @mrgabagoo8905 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @Richard Chave those pointless morons are people i cannot escape.. I don't like any of it but that's the best way i know how to deal with it..

    • @mrgabagoo8905
      @mrgabagoo8905 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @Aggeliki P. Your welcome

    • @beverlycrittendon4495
      @beverlycrittendon4495 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      This is true

  • @rickcolumbo3148
    @rickcolumbo3148 3 ปีที่แล้ว +45

    It seems to me there would be far greater reward in luring the narcissist onto a catapult and flinging them into a ravine or perhaps a rumbling volcano.

  • @michaeloneill5877
    @michaeloneill5877 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    How to keep Narcs at bay...
    Total Silence, with Gray Rock, straight to the Point answers; only if necessary !!!

  • @alfredmiles6638
    @alfredmiles6638 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    You always win because they are never happy. If you have to be around them just act indifferent like nothing bothers you. Im just friendly and cordial. Gets me through the moment.

  • @timothygenaw2199
    @timothygenaw2199 3 ปีที่แล้ว +47

    I play my 72 year old narc dad all the time. I just ask him question about himself and laugh inside as he talks for an hour about himself.

    • @huetuber1204
      @huetuber1204 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      How exactly is that playing him? To have him blab about himself endlessly? It seems more like self-inflicted torture to me if I did that to a narc!

    • @timothygenaw2199
      @timothygenaw2199 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@huetuber1204 the torture is me trying to share aspects of my life with him, a give and take dialogue, and him not caring about me at all. Just turns the conversation onto himself all the time. So I give up. I don't need him to care about me anymore. I'm over it because I know how he is. So I just roll with it.

    • @BLITZY261
      @BLITZY261 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@huetuber1204 ...unless you have invisible headphones and your phone in your pocket with DIRE STRAITS GREATEST HITS...and smile every now and again.

    • @westcoastvibes1193
      @westcoastvibes1193 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      My mother does that. She talks at me not with me. I let her ramble or I leave the room while she is talking about nothing as usual.

    • @AV-fx8kv
      @AV-fx8kv 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Jaja mom does this , talk about my issues or about myself amd her response is about herself or her experiences 100% of the time so fkn annoying like who gives a fk can they not just listen to us and not have tje response or convo revolve around them lmao amd when I tell them to stop they'll just say" well I'm on the same subject here" um no far from it

  • @svg2671
    @svg2671 3 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    Makes sense, but oh my goodness I cant imagine living everyday life doing this. Its exhausting

  • @pellestroika177
    @pellestroika177 3 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    I fantasize about 2 narcissists stuck in a narc battle trying to out-narc eachother

  • @bereal4761
    @bereal4761 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    Yes if you have to deal just be indifferent. Wish I knew this years ago!! 😉

  • @daunkintzer5212
    @daunkintzer5212 3 ปีที่แล้ว +27

    They do think they are God! But not my God!

  • @ang3956
    @ang3956 3 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    I hear no lies here Jess .. I finessed my ex narc financially for over a year by making him feel guilty for moving on so quickly with the new supply after a 20 year marriage. Of course I played victim (which wasnt too hard) he felt the guilt so would never say no to me plus he wanted to still be able to check in on me from time to time (as they do) Im so over the break up and playing with the fool now

    • @allybailey2045
      @allybailey2045 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      A true narc has no guilt

    • @ang3956
      @ang3956 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@allybailey2045 Yes some do because it depends on the circumstances and your personal story

  • @abdullahazzam3470
    @abdullahazzam3470 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    Covert narcissists are indeed very paranoid and they know very well the emotions of the empaths

    • @ayaanmohamed6463
      @ayaanmohamed6463 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      That is very sad 😞

    • @detjaggillar8081
      @detjaggillar8081 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@ayaanmohamed6463 Sad AND it could be dangerous for the empath health that the narc already know how the victim often react. So do this only if it make You to have a little bit of calm instead of having the usual chaos ... and if You don't could have No Contact.

  • @butslug
    @butslug 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    I was grey rocking and keeping the peace in the end. he hated it and would pick at me constantly hoping I would react. guess he needed that supply that I wasn't giving him. and last fight I just quit. I didn't want to fight anymore. me just quiting was a shock to him. short lived though. he was one that I didn't want to manipulate. I just wanted peace or to get away.

  • @krob5079
    @krob5079 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I hear you Jess, this would of helped when I was still in a business with my ex narc. Thanks again! 💖

  • @kimjoan212
    @kimjoan212 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Compliments doesn’t work.... they will exhaust you to no end ...... with all sincerity...

  • @mmommo-hx4dx
    @mmommo-hx4dx 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    don't try to play a man. I got out after 37 years. I'm free now, so happy I cry.

  • @faithrumbidzaimunaku9451
    @faithrumbidzaimunaku9451 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Thank you for acknowledging that I’m not stupid for realizing that I can’t just storm out. I need a level headed plan. I have been feeling really stupid. My friends are like, after all you know, I Ithought you were smart

  • @sparkelsdiamond2699
    @sparkelsdiamond2699 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    No brainer
    Once we are awakened EMPATHS not good or bad
    But wht gets me they think they are the only ones who Hoover or anything
    They are LAME NASTY LITTLE BOYS
    Put them in the naughty corner & make UR ESCAPE

  • @Canaday291
    @Canaday291 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    It’s sad but true that if you’re forced to play their rabbit hole games you have to have a strategy to never give them the negative reaction they instigate ,crave ,and thrive off of
    And manipulate it into your favor

  • @khaartoumletstalk9037
    @khaartoumletstalk9037 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    Thanks for talking us through these. I think we do this 'instinctively' if we have lived with these characters a lot! I have been re-watching a lot of old films and identifying a lot of the narcissism. I watched that Hong Kong classic '2046' today. All those drunken sex addict characters with intimacy problems and problems of being alone are all narcissists. And as the narcissistic bullshit was being played...I was saying, "no no, don't fall for it..."...The games after are so predictable and we have NAMES to describe these behaviours now. I came to the conclusion during that film that Narcissists are Addicts. Dopamine Addicts. When the Dopamine is low [apparently they have peculiar Dompamine Receptors in their brains that always run 'flat' and they are always 'bored'. But they are also Hyper Arousal Dopamine Receptors that go Zero to One Hundred when they get something they like: Sex, Alcohol, Flirting, Attention... They have addicts' brains...And doctors can identify them from their brain scans accurately... ; ) K

    • @gregorspaete1844
      @gregorspaete1844 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      ... have you read Rhonda Freeman? I am exactly on that path, too. They See addicts, their brain is therefore different ... ans they need stuff ...

  • @abcstudent2345
    @abcstudent2345 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Taking the same weapon of them is possible. Every child of narc parents know both sides of Manipulation. People pleasing and devalue. It depends which one was safer to life

  • @irenerizza9580
    @irenerizza9580 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    Before my knowledge of NPD I tried to support him, understand him and put up with him by trying keeping the peace but it doesnt work the more control on there end the more evil they become its never enough. They are hard work, there not worth it. I have two children I don't need a third child. Just leave the relationshit ! No contact for 4 months and I feel more at peace and free

    • @bri7500
      @bri7500 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I concur with this

  • @fleep9008
    @fleep9008 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    If you can be happy without them/it, then you win.

  • @angeltimoneri1922
    @angeltimoneri1922 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Great video Jess!!

  • @commonsense4154
    @commonsense4154 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    No contact...why entertain it?Why is it important to keep them calm...wtf😳😳🤦🤦

  • @Jagsla
    @Jagsla 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Love this!! Great video..

  • @ryanreagan6073
    @ryanreagan6073 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    I was in a perfect situation I leveled the playing field I turned the tables they lack foresight their textbook predictable you just got to be a couple steps ahead I completely destroyed mine I made sure I was the one she hated the most until she lies stinking in Earth

  • @poohbear1714
    @poohbear1714 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I started using the narc's own tactics against him a while back. Took some pages out of his own book and used them against him. Started with gray rock technique and he HATES it, now he starts to ignore me, which is great until outside influences- another narcissist buddy of his- influences him to start nitpicking on me for anything cuz I called THAT narcissist out and he was reprimanded by a committee for manipulating their rules. So now THAT narcissist takes it out on me and influences my narc to turn against me. So basically now I have multiple narcs ganging up against me cuz THAT outsude narc has recruited flying monkeys to join in. They all intimidated by little old me, not even 5ft tall. So 2 male narcs and multiple flying monkeys. I stumbled across a pin on pinterest a couple years ago when I started healing from my narc. I never knew what a narcissist WAS until I clicked on that pin and started reading more. I havw learned so much on narcissists, not expert but at least I know what I'm dealing with now, how to recognize red flags, have healed enough now to start trusting my intuition again. I dont put ANYTHING past my narc. The narc ended up getting out mastered by hus narcissistic ho who's involved with 3rd, 4th and 5th parties/same gender...can't make up her mind which sex she prefers and won't give up none of them. So we have me as the 1st party, my nsrc is 2nd party, the narcississtic ho (sexually confused ) is 3rd party, her husband is 4rth party, HER 3rd party partner (male) is 5th party, and her sexually confused partner is 6th party. Too many people in this mess, I just want OUT but my narc won't let me leave him either. He used to sabotage my vehicle and pull along trailers. I have 2 flat tires on one of my trailers and one of my trucks just recently started leaking coolant (friday). He used to mess with the brakes or the gears in the past and it just so happens that the title to that truck is supposed to be sent in mail and hes supposed to sign the title over to me. How convenient is that? We argued last Thursday and didn't show up to his jobsite Friday cuz the last thing he told me Thursday when we argued was to stay out of his machines. I helped him build his company for last 11 yrs and he just recently pulled me out if retirement cuz he couldn't find somebody to run one of his machines cuz an employee quit on him announced. He cant keep employees cuz he doesnt care how he treats people. I have to make sure all my ducks are in a row before I leave...we have UNFINISHED BUSINESS.

  • @jennyezinne5016
    @jennyezinne5016 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    My bf cheated , I wanted us to discuss about it but he kept me silent for two weeks and some days now, no contact, no nothing, I cald him on his birthday, he still didn't pick my cals, he is giving me silent treatment, does it mean he is a narcissist

    • @abcstudent2345
      @abcstudent2345 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      maybe he is. What do you do with the no contact?

    • @gregorspaete1844
      @gregorspaete1844 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yes

    • @jennyezinne5016
      @jennyezinne5016 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@abcstudent2345 I have deleted his number, unfollowed him on Instagram, am keeping him silent too, am just giving him by ending of this month if I dnt hear from him then am forgetting him totally, is not easy to forget someone you love , but am going to be strong

    • @Ready0rNot24
      @Ready0rNot24 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      There's really nothing to discuss after an infedility. But sometimes our codependency is what draws us to them

  • @Breakingfreefromnarcissism
    @Breakingfreefromnarcissism 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Numbers 1 and 4 for me especially

  • @drewspear6047
    @drewspear6047 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Great post,. Ever been to Flannerys ?

  • @nicolesardo6478
    @nicolesardo6478 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Jess you are fantastic!!!... Funny af

  • @janiebutterfly5251
    @janiebutterfly5251 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Do I block and delete ????? Xxx

  • @terewandrey3636
    @terewandrey3636 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Thanks for the advice

  • @grizbear9519
    @grizbear9519 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    They feed on ANY attention you give them! How sick are they

  • @jannlewandowski5540
    @jannlewandowski5540 ปีที่แล้ว

    The way he manipulated me was having me pay for everything bcse he was "saving" for our wedding & honeymoon. He made twice as much as me, and I believed him. GOD knows how much he had in his account. Just goes to show,even if you pay a $2.00 bridge fare, that's pretty bad. Geez, I don't think I ever saw his wallet!

  • @JevonMyles
    @JevonMyles 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    And how does this work in a co parenting situation?

  • @Cozmic8888
    @Cozmic8888 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Great advice THX 💛🕯💛

  • @AnnLafemme
    @AnnLafemme 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    I wish I could do this, I mean I could but I didnt want to do it because I couldnt bear his serial cheating and non stop lying.

  • @solice8844
    @solice8844 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    No I don’t need to manipulate a narcissist and I don’t want anything from a narcissist that he/she will not ultimately take back in spades against my personal peace and harmony.

  • @noteworthy4247
    @noteworthy4247 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    I tell mine I'll see him, he books a room and oh snap I keep forgetting to show up (no he is not married he just knows I'll never have him at my place cuz everyone detests him and he bounces around)

  • @sandradaily6019
    @sandradaily6019 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    How do you set up a 1 on 1

    • @JessStanley
      @JessStanley  3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Send an email to bookachatwithjess@gmail.com

  • @myladyrose2937
    @myladyrose2937 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    My ex narc I know he is so much high respect on who I am. But he still treat me like shit because I always hit his ego and stupidity in a very good way. That's hurt him so much. Now he said my last ex I suppose to marry her, i suppose to have a kids with her, we plan to build a family but now shes gone and its hurt me deeply😂😂 My style on narc is so gentle yet makes him crazy. As I am INFJ you know I'm so much patients talking with sense I always agreeing on what he said even it's wrong but still I correct him in a nice way. For 4 years he always talk shits on me yet I still replied him with a respect. Not even talk even one bad word on him. Because I know someday when I'm gone in his life he know how different I am.

  • @40ogre
    @40ogre 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    🙏🏾

  • @warchild100
    @warchild100 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Get somthing bigger than they have over you on them.. then you can get them to do what you want ..

  • @Feathered_Moon
    @Feathered_Moon 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Can't a manipulation be getting somebody to consider what you're talking about so they can open their minds to being a better person or having a better life for themselves?

    • @komalkoul6486
      @komalkoul6486 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Hehe yeah try dat with a narc

    • @dennish3962
      @dennish3962 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Impossible with a narcissist. Don't bother, instead work on breaking your trauma bond and getting the hell away.

  • @johnpaul2285
    @johnpaul2285 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Peace

  • @ashlynheidebrecht1969
    @ashlynheidebrecht1969 2 ปีที่แล้ว

    You have to be careful agreeing with a narcissist's shit talk about someone at work because they could turn around and go tell that person what you said and kiss up to them and make you look like the bad guy

  • @daniellemarseco3335
    @daniellemarseco3335 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    ❤️❤️❤️

  • @rogerchristopher7448
    @rogerchristopher7448 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Looks like all you can do is get them away from you

  • @mahoganymillworks7156
    @mahoganymillworks7156 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    So basically boost their ego, and act like a narcissistic doormat 😂

    • @svrfx3573
      @svrfx3573 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Narcissistic fluffing its a survival skill some have to master just to survive, think about having to deal with a Malignant Narc in the work place, "he's your boss"

    • @svrfx3573
      @svrfx3573 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      oops, looks like she covers it.

  • @ryanreagan6073
    @ryanreagan6073 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    I'm not into the narcissistic boo boos I'm more into the mortification the narcissistic collapse

  • @carolewise
    @carolewise 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    Don't have the time that sounds narcissistic.

  • @rodbeida
    @rodbeida 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    How do get ahold of you...I need help

    • @JessStanley
      @JessStanley  3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Send an email to bookachatwithjess@gmail.com

  • @oazazdravlja5
    @oazazdravlja5 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    👏👏👏🤣🤣🤣❤️❤️❤️

  • @khanassad2984
    @khanassad2984 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    They are teachers, it’s too late for your video