I've been offline for a while. After being homeless for close to three years (thanks to the narc in my life) I spent 15 months of that time in emergency housing. Everything I owned was taken by the narcissist. I mean everything, he even gave away my clothes. However during my time of homelessness I began building up a supply of household goods, and held on to the hope that I would find a place one day. I'm overjoyed to say that I now have a home. I've been able to fill my place with stuff that has never been seen or touched by that nasty piece of work that is my ex. Finally a place to call home. Good things came my way. Never give up on hope. Sunshine comes after rain. Life does get better. Keep looking forward with your eyes on the prize, which is happiness and harmony within yourself, (myself) 💙🤗
Bless your heart!! You are such a strong and lovely person with the highest level fortitude!! So proud of you and keep us posted with your progress!! Sending love and hugs!!😊❤️💚❤️💞
Hi Andrew, a resounding yes from me. I gave 100% to my marriage and that's the heartbreaking part, it was never enough. Gave 100% to get scraps of gratitude or recognition whenever he was bothered to be present. He spent 7 nights out seeing 'friends', grabbing supply or being someone's hero while I done my duties at home making his life perfect and comfortable for when he decided to 'visit'. It's amazing how you see it all clearly when you are out of the situation and especially out of the fog. Thank you for all your help with understanding these parasites.
Not one single night, can these monsters be alone. It gets worse w age. He was in his late forty sitting around after work w his friends, partying. Free-loading.
No, the narcissist didn't get the best of me. The best is after the break up, where I realized what amazing person I am and how much more I have to look forward to. 🙂 Meanwhile a narcissist will always stay a narcissist. Always unsatisfied.
Exactly. The narc will always be working on getting a fix or snagging more supply. I can't even imagine living that way. Too often as well...we are described as weak people in this situationships. I never felt like a weak person. I remember a lot of other emotions and things though. I was way too damn busy to be weak. There was zero information about these clowns at that time. I've learned so much. You don't 'survive' after being with a narcissist if you are a weak person. You take your own time to heal and process. And you come out stronger than ever before! Very 'clear'. You can smell BS a mile away. Do not ever rush into anything with anyone. Never cast your pearls to a swine. Nobody calls the shots on me. I do. Never, ever feel 'obligated' to respond with a yes ..when your intuition...heart is screaming NO. Namaste 💜💌
Narcissists have a jezebel spirit. They know exactly what they are doing and they are evil. What they do that is most disturbing is how they treat their adult children. They not only discard you, but they also discard their children and grandchildren.
Before my narc ex gf came into my life I was happy... Had friends, a nice little flat on my own and was settled. Now I'm in debt , having to pay for the apartment that she decided we needed to move too, ive been alienated from some friends, her family that I bonded with and was left in the most narc way ever, being told I love you but I've been sleeping with someone else and I've given you an STI. This is what you get it seems for trying your hardest to love someone with this disorder.. She also tried to get me thrown out of my home, smear campaigned me whilst she was actually with me!, discarded me and returned more times than I care to remember, blamed me for absolutely everything etc etc.. she also took my son to another county and managed to get an injunction against me by lying to the family court, giving false allegations without a single shred of evidence to support her disgusting and outrageous claims.. She basically demonised me for 4 years for not putting up with her bs. It makes me totally sick to my stomach to now know what these people are capable of.. I felt absolutely violated throughout. I'm so glad her poison is finally out of my life, I'm over her.. big time, but I miss my beautiful son and that's her final bullet.
She's made it very easy after this last discard to get through this.. The fog is gone and I fully understand now what she is, I guess I should be thankful for that at least right. ❤️
Oh my! You have been through hell. You’re still hanging in there and will get through. Others will see her true colors and you will always have your truth and dignity.
It's almost like narcissists are human hunters and they are a wolf in sheep's clothing, laying in wait for when we let our guard down. Stay strong everyone
I think that's a good description. You would think they'd appreciate the trust extended to them, but they prefer to drag people down rather than experience personal growth. You stay strong, too!
YES!! I norrmally have a lot of energy, but by the time I simply could not take more of the abuse, I was totally drained!!. 25 years later have my energy plus plus back!! Life is wonderful post narc sitting on that peak of indifference.!! Wishing all precious folks in this commuity strength, lots of energy and peace as you trek on the healing path!! Andrew, love your wisdom and sage advice!!❤🤍💚💞💞
The relief for no longer being beholden to them is immense. The mind games, the drama , the feeling of inferiority leaves along with them . A peaceful life can return , feeling safe and well is possible again .
Yes….Absolutely a Narcissist! Absolutely giving 💯of myself. The abuse is unreal. Sadly!! It’s the hardest thing I have ever had to pull myself away from. I left x 2 - Hardest thing I have ever done. Trauma Bonding is a nightmare. Do give yourself PLENTY of time to heal. There isn’t a timeframe. The Longer your bonded, the harder to break and get away. My heart breaks for anyone who has ever been through this. Thank you Andrew!! ❤
I am hoping it will not take 13 years to bleed it out…the perpetual abuse has left a lot of what seems to be permanent damage to my reactions to things in life. It’s like having to go to recovery to live a normal life again and chisel yourself out again.
@@KadyPowellAEROPOLEONEKD - Same. I have 34+ yrs to overcome. Hoping this will get much better w time. It has, to some degree, but I feel very wounded and hurt still. It’s been hard. Many blessings to you. I understand completely.
I thought I was a smart, savvy and level headed person. I always did the right thing and I always tried to make careful decisions. BUT the Narc that I got mixed up with, was way smarter and more savvy. If I was 2 steps ahead, he was 10 steps ahead. And on top of that, he took advantage of my love for him. He weaponized my love! I still can’t believe that I went through that marriage. Not just a relationship…I married this person! When all the BS gradually happened, I tried to rationalize and I tried to fix things. I blamed myself and I strived to make things better. By the time it was over, I had no clue what hit me. I spent years going over it in my head. Asking myself what I did wrong? Noticing that something was not right with him, something was off…but I could not put my finger on it. Many years later, I learned what had happened and who I was dealing with after I reluctantly went to therapy with a great Psychologist. I did not want to go but one of my friends kept encouraging me because she saw I struggling with my divorce. Also, another friend revealed that she never liked my ex-husband because he gave her bad vibes but she did not know what to say or how to get involved. How crazy is that?! To go through such torment and not know what the heck is going on because you lack that specific knowledge. Now that I know, it freaks me out that I was with this person and trusted him. He left me so damaged; emotionally, mentally and financially. I still can’t wrap my mind around it but I’m gradually regaining my peace and happiness. Eventually, I will be whole again, the same way I was before I met him. Until then, I’m watching your videos and other videos. Researching, meditating, coping, etc…Sending good vibes and thank you.
This could have been me word for word.. I'm happy and different now, as Andrew said many times, we are where we need to be, that is so true. It has been very difficult, at times, but it is achievable. I love and trust myself more than I ever have. I take no more unfounded criticism, and I never will..Thank you to Andrew, and everyone who has helped me to this place. Helping me find me ))
Yes. I didn’t have the knowledge, information or a clue what or who I was dealing with. Challenging to fight against when you have no idea what it is. Now that I know….I can figure it out, an do WAY better by putting myself first. Hard stuff when you don’t have info!! Once you know ….. it all makes perfect sense and the tide can change to better!!!
You will get through and find your happiness and peace again - its hard and it hurts - please believe in yourself and a positive future. Xx sending love xxx
Narcissists feel entitled! To everything that is yours on so many levels ( wrongly!!) until no more, the greatest strength and blessing is to see the light and remember who you are! Thank you Andrew for that video so true! God bless 🙏
Andrew, we who have been through the darknest night of the soul as a side effect of the aftermath of narcissists know we have had our soul renched and thank God got the inner strength to survive and aspire to trive in the the beautiful light that this world can be thank God truly Andrew your vidio s are life affirming in a beautiful way God bless you 🙏☀️🌹
Right you are, I gave the very best of myself for nearly four years to this egoist. Former smokers will relate, there comes a point when one more puff is not even an option. That's where I am with the narc, I had to reach the saturation point. Am now trying to get my groove back. Anyhow, thank you, Andrew. I come to your channel whenever I need a pep talk, and always gain altitude. 🙏🏻
Reminds me of the song Best of You by The Foo Fighters. It's mindblowing to listen to videos like yours about this and actually live it. It's like a Stephen King novel coming to life out of the pages. I would wonder many times why he would only get so close with me than either start an argument or stonewall me. He did get the best of me. I would try numerous times in so many different ways to make it work. To find out what I was doing wrong when this whole time it wouldn't have mattered what I did or didn't do. He got my best and my smile, too. I hope to smile again someday.
Awesome song! I just looked up the lyrics as I haven't heard it for a while, this line really stood out: "Were you born to resist or be abused?" How true is this!!!
If I'd had the wisdom, I definitely would not have spent over 9 years trying my best to please an unempathic malcontent 😂 nor would I have sacrificed to pay for all of his expenses. Yes, I gave my best, while he would rarely even curl his lips upward to give me a smile. The fog was thick. Your teachings remove the fog. Thank you, Andrew! 🌼🌷🍀🌺
I'm in love with your enthusiasm to turn a nightmare experience into a gold glitter spray, to mark the SS's, aka Smirky Sneaks, by empowering empathic, emancipated, espionage experts. Haha! I like your whole face! Thank you for sharing your courage.
15 years together very devastated and still love her,starting to look on line to figure things out or fix the problem with myself.some days its convincing its her other days not so much, maybe the 15 years of toxic abuse takes its toll, self improving and watching your videos and others is helping, thankyou Andrew! Still feel lost, but its only been a few months of discovery, in the process of discard, i believe.
Know exactly what you mean. I am working on this daily. Some steps ahead, a few steps back. This is how it goes for me but I can feel myself getting better. Hang in there!
ABSOLUTLY!! Yes! But now I give myself MY best. If there are leftovers - I’ll share. 😉 Am I the only one who’s witnessing a rebirth of your genuine smile?!?! It must be a bonus perk of following you. Stay strong! Namaste 🙏
Yes, the narcissist was getting the best of us … and we gave the best of us to please them , and try to make things work ..we did it with our heart, our love … in vain … so much disappointment and waste of energy each time 😔 Thank you Andrew for your video and happy to see you smile at the end of the video today 😁🙏You’re brave 💪
My first encounter with a narc was my first husband. He discarded me right after we had a baby girl. He kept everything we had from the marriage, the money from our large wedding, household and two cars. What a piece of garbage that man is. I was 23 years old and did not know what hit me. Thank God Andrew for the wisdom. My whole life has been a magnet for narcissists, and I am happy to say I am free today. One of the posts I read on the channel was “are there any people who are NOT narcissists? I can relate to that statement! 😮 Stay alert, test the spirits.
Last year I bought all the Christmas gifts for all the family and got absolutely nothing in return! His loss! I left in February and can officially file for divorce in 3 months. Good riddance!
Oh yes definitely gave my best. And everything you said from all the public praising in front of large and small audiences to the private behind the door belittling. Never knowing is it Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde. Now that I think back maybe I should have taken notes that was one of his favorite things to watch in the engagement season (forgot about that til now). He picked the queen caretaker and codependent high achiever. He knew exactly what he was doing (as I now know ALL narcissists KNOW what they are doing) - and as soon as I saw a tear drop I was digging my heels in deeper to alleviate any amount of struggle or pain on his end. It is NOT reciprocated and I did not even know I never learned to love myself right. Learning now. Humbled more and more by a lifetime of this cycle, but I’m not having shame now - just digging my heels in for me and learning and fighting for me. They don’t deserve us. They don’t. I wish I could help those still trauma bonded. It’s a slow painful death and I pray anyone attached GETS OUT. Great message Andrew and loved seeing your smile.
A long time ago I took a hard line on taking responsibility, as much as I could. Radically. I wasn’t born that way but my life got so far out of control that in order to reel it in, I had to radically take responsibility for everything that I could to avoid ever going down that dark path again. Being at the mercy of circumstances did not appeal to me one bit. I realized how not everyone is like this the hard way, at the hands of the narcissist but I still take the hard line, being responsible but now I never expect this from anyone else. Although I like to think that as a prerequisite the person that I will be the closest to will have to take the same hard line on responsibility as I do, at least as my equal.
I couldn't agree more...there were a handful of people who offered to help me year's ago when I was at my lowest. And they too had an agenda. I'm so happy those dark days are behind me. The needless suffering and the dysfunction of our global society really started making sense to me after all these painful lessons. Brighter days ahead for humanity 💜🙏💌
Thank you Andrew, I needed to hear this. Yeh my narcopath used to leave for hrs and yes wouldnt answer his phone. And yep would leave. I'm glad I heard your message today. I'm still healing. My friend says to move on but listening to u helps me everyday. Thank you for your videos
Now, I remember your, "First, Second, Third", and I smile🥰. Freedom Rocks, and better late than never❣️. Thank you so much, Andrew. I always need the reminders even solidly in Version 3.
How sad, right? The person who least deserved anything is the one we gave some of the best years of our life to😢😢 The energy that could have been put to a much better purpose, to make a difference and spread more love and light got sucked into the bottomless pit that is the narcissist.
Your a beautiful person Andrew , you done great tonight, you described everything I went thru , for me it was too bad I was in a fog of lies, after the divorce months after he came back , I did cry then we parted , few yrs. past he tried it again but this time I rejected his return, now the thought of it makes me sick & dodge him when I know he's around- may Yeshua give you deep peace in you're mind, heart & spirit, & renewed strength & continuous healing in every way you need it most, not only to you but all who are watching- Shalom & Thank You too!!! 🔥💙🙏😉
Im some years into single life but im beyond tired i feel beaten and i have no idea how to ever find the strenght completly back again. While i were with the narc i also lost both familymembers and friends to death and i was grieving but without any love from the man that claimed that he loved me. I never knew about narcissism before him and i have learned so much through you Andrew so Thank you so much for all that you do ❤️❤️❤️
Oo yes. Lately looked at all the scenarios where I used to feel so sad .miserable ..drained yet he could see it and didn't care. The pics I took in those years show so much pain in my face I am out of it9months now and I am grateful to have channel like yours Thankyou
It’s weird how we gave the best to them, and when the relationship ended it took us every single day for a year to reflect and do the inner work to heal, while they couldn’t give a toss and are probably playing their games with new supply. We suffered, they don’t care at all. It has also ruined my trust in dating again, just can’t do it anymore.
Hi Bianca. You may feel differently about dating later. I like men. They're out there. Divine timing Your not ready your finding your true self and getting stronger❤️your beautiful. 🕊🕊🕊
Great video Andrew as always. You know I gave everything I had to my ex narc just like you did. He did not appreciate it much I am sure. But you know what, my biggest reward today besides being free of him is the idea that one day I will meet the right person, a kind, loving human being and I will have the healthiest relationship I always wanted. I read today this quote from Oprah; " Every one of us gets through the tough times because somebody is there, standing in the gap to close it for us" You look stronger today Andrew, i am happy to see that. We are all pulling for you on the channel to see you get through this trying time. I am sending love your way. Have a lovely evening. 😘🫂♥
Yikes When ever I got a sliver of hope and spend my day overly excited that possible she made a change that was a lie she would pull the rug right out from under me ! Painful I'm truly thankful I don't give to her at all just to myself and my daughter and my 2 grandsons great video Andrew Glad to have caught this one godbless you and all of your friends
YES! YES! YES! AND YES!!!! I gave him so so much more than he deserved and more chances and he just took and took and like an idiot I didn’t say no. Until I finally did at the end of August 2022. Then I met you Andrew by chance and now I know and now I see the red flags 🚩 so clear. What was wrong with me??? I’m happy he is finally out of my life but I’m struggling with the disappointment in myself. I’m struggling with the aftermath pain. It hurts to realize I was used for being a kind human a loving forgiving person. He took advantage of all that makes me me. How could I dance with the devil like that ???? It’s good to see you smile today Andrew. Thank you and thanks to everyone in the group for sharing kind helpful advice. I appreciate a kind safe place to vent. So thanks everyone ✌🏻❤
I did the same Rebecca. Going on 4 years away from that mess. Don't be so hard on yourself. They are wolves in sheep's clothing. Takers, Users. They knew exactly what they were doing. Predators! You never needed him. Take care of you!
Yea this resonated deeply , he hated that I was independent financially and a good life with family and friends. He was miserable 95percent of the time , he was always the victim, I gave💯💯💯💯 but to no avail, I never lost touch with my life outside of him I had other responsabilites, .all the encouragement and compassion and support ,I went as far as I could ,then suddenly I Left,
I gave more then the best of me, I stayed at home taking care of the house hold. Just like I do now, but I do it for myself. I give myself the best of me now. 😁 I think he knew he was losing control of me, when I took a side job to help a nice church lady to clean her house. God bless ya Andrew for your great videos and the words and God bless everyone else in the community. 👃😁
My weakness was I couldn’t say no. God has sent a drug addict, a narcissist and a sociopath with his vulture family. I learned to say no. Say no quickly and with authority
Yes, they all got the most sincere, loyal dedication & love from me. It took a lot of life lessons for me to learn how to recognize disingenuous people & avoid them. I am very glad that I finally don't have any of them in my life. I'm proud of myself for refusing to spend time with one of them who was visiting near me and wanted to meet for lunch. But she got her sister who I have no problem with to contact me & make plans only to slip in, "Oh, by the way, Dot (former frenemy) will be with me" routine. I declined, she tried to pressure me, I declined again & again & then I simply shut down the chat. Thankfully the people-pleaser part of me is gone. Yes, I give my best to people. That is why I have learned to be very selective of who gets my time & energy. Thanks for another great video. I hope you are doing well tonight. Hope everyone is peaceful & well. It's just cool enough here tonight to drop the windows down & listen to the night. 😻😻😻😺😺😺
It still amazes me how the human brain can become so damaged to cause some people to behave in such a way as to spread their evil ways into society. The DSM-V manual should be a book all high school students need to be exposed to. The earlier the better. TY Andrew~
Oh my yes , you said everything to the T . Why did it take me do many heats to see the truth. I just couldn’t accept it . I had two Narcissist. My husband & my daughter . Now he has dementia or Alzheimer’s. I even cared for him . But now she is taking care of her father . I used up all of me & finances & resources . So now she is caring for her father two narcissist living with one another . He is now her grade A supply & immediately put all his finances in her name as his fiduciary , medical & financial power of attorney. . Oh yes she would say that if you do this then I will do thus . I saw many red flags. They came more frequently & that’s how I caught it .
I have been single since 1989 . I gave my very best & it’s taken so long to heal & Im still not completely healed. I don’t date . I refuse in fear of attracting another narcissist. I’m sorry but I feel like I will never be healed from all the damage that’s been done so they win. It’s contrary to my faith but it’s how I feel . I chose to be single . I go out to eat by myself. I go to the movies by myself . I go to church by myself ❤I do everything by myself . I’m ok with me . I’m ok with healing time 33 years later . It’s like I ended with the father but restarted with the daughter . Oh my . I was a glutton yo be abused .
I agree with everything you said Andrew. Thank you. I gave the best of me to the narcisists until I didn’t. I came to a point when I was done. My heart made a decision that I am unable to have anything to do with the evil narcisists operate under the influence of. Blessed was that day! God bless you Andrew.
Thankyou for your insight, as ever. I always felt that my soon-to-be ex husband’s behaviour was normal because of my upbringing with a narcissistic mother. This channel has opened my eyes to the evil behaviour of a narcissist. Now to avoid this going forward…. 💛
Many times he gave me compliments...but he never sad that i was a good person. He sad to me that i was no sweet and too hot to handle..in conflict he sad that i was crazy in front of my kids. Sometimes i see him in the neighbourhood and i hate him to see him smile to me and say hello
I gave 100% of myself to her and after 7years we bought a house and i found that it is when we bought the house i started to see the difference from her. Like always i was a yes person and just ignore the red flags but as sons grew older and started to make their voices heard i started to see more of her true self but i push it aside. She always wanted to do something on the week, always going out every weekend and sometimes myself and the kids didn't want to do anything on a weekend. Now this is when she removes her mask and started rage fit and putting word like we are boring (devaluing me and the kids) we never want to do anything with her (like because 1 weekend we decided we we're not interested) and the best playing the victim card to make us feel bad because we didn't to do anything just for 1 day. She put so much drama that in the end of argument she told me i was being dramatic. I was the one staying home more often to take care of the kids, the house, the household chores and she would not put an ounce of energy to help me most of the time. Today what is more important to her it is called Phone, agenda, work, dog and the new supply. Thank you for getting me out of that fog Andrew. Namaste and we stay strong.
I stay busy all day, and I love my life. I can’t wait to view your videos daily. I absolutely love your channel. Thank you for your fabulous life-changing teachings. And yes I was doing all the work! 😢. I actually made homemade tortillas etc., and this went on for year, and of course the narcissist was happy. I was supplying all his needs. But I’m glad to say that those days are gone. Now I can spot red flags red flags 🚩 🚩! I’m glad that we discovered the term narcissist and the experience was horrific. I’m so different now. I’m not the same person that I was yesterday. I’m different!
You always get overwhelmed by these people you don't exist at the same level of reality as them, you can lower yourself to their level for a little while and temporarily beat them at their own game but it will make you sick to your soul if you keep it up for long. They plan their petty existence like a general going to war and never stop and it's very dark stuff. The only real way you "win" with these people is to not be anywhere near them.
Indeed the Narc will always try to strip you down to nothing!!!! That’s the personality trait of Narcissism while the real truth is that idiot is nothing more but a bully, intimidate, condescending and drag you down to his /her level! Remember misery loves company
Spot on and accurate! No matter how much you do, it’s never good enough. You sacrifice, you love unconditionally, you accept all their behavior and rage fits an chalk it up to their terrible childhood, until the day comes when you feel you will drop from the stress, pain, and torture you are feeling inside. Thank you, Andrew for all you do and I hope you are hanging in there with the last couple of days being so emotional for you. I also wanted to ask everyone in the community if they have ever seen this with their child being with a narcissist? My wonderful son is about to move 100’s of miles away from (NH to NC)with his narc gf and I feel so defeated. I’ve been through it and now my baby is going through it but has no idea what she is. Any advice please, will help. God bless and stay strong everyone 🙏💕
Everything you say is so true. I have so many bad memories of things they did or tried to do. Those of us who are away from them and their evil clutches are truly blessed. Watching these videos each day, I count my blessings that I am here and free at last. Thanks so much Andrew. Much 💘 love.
Hi Andrew hope you’re having a better day today.❤You’re videos as always hit home. I tried and tried and tried until I was blue in the face to please this person and nothing was enough ever. He wore me out mentally, emotionally, and physically. He was literally killing me with his erratic behavior and bs. For me the hard part is the breadcrumbs moments of happiness that I held onto so tightly, praying things would change that has made this discard so tough. I will never ever allow this to happen again. Thank you for your commitment to us. I can’t wait to get off work to watch your videos, you are helping me see the progress I am making and that I never deserved that treatment. Neither did you! You are a rare soul with a heart of gold. Thank you so much. Have a great night. ❤️❤️🙏🙏❤️❤️
Andrew, so sorry to see you hurting this way. I know all of us want to help and do whatever we can. WE LOVE YOU, AND ALWAYS WILL. YOU ARE IN PAIN, AND YET YOU ARE HERE FOR US. WE ARE ALL HERE FOR YOU. WE LOVE YOU...❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Thanks again Andrew for sharing your wisdom and hi beautiful community!! I myself was never aware of the full extent how damaged/evil my ex-partner was until as early as last-year. I gave All of myself to my ex-partner, and was given intermittently 'breadcrumbs of hope' in return for 5 years. My family who she never made any time nor effort for, had a strong sense something was abnormal, whilst I was spoon-fed lie, upon lie upon lie. I never felt good enough within the 5 year relationship and Always felt my very best was never good enough that has crushed my self-worth. No matter how hard I 'proved' myself to her by jumping through her hoops, they became higher & higher & higher to the brink of suicide. And more unrealistic to attain. It's been 3 months since I was discarded, like I have been innumerable times before. But now it seems final. Now I am being blamed for giving the bare-minimum, being equally to blame for the demise of the relationship. I loath myself for still loving her and being full of self-doubt over my part to play, also feeling extremely guilty for its tragic ending. Since I was told by a mental health practitioner last-year based on my symptoms, my ex-partner has a boarderline personality disorder that corresponded to what she herself told me towards the end of 2020 by a health professional, the abuse has been acutely reactive. I miss my step-son that words cannot describe who he sees me more of a dad than his own biological, narcissistic father. And despite we as a family having countless conversations in relation to me Always playing a part in his life if he wishes me to, his mom has stopped all contact between us. I feel dead inside that my intuition tells me this is how she feels towards herself. I'm terrified of what my future has in store for me. I feel I somehow deserved all of this day-in-day-out, chronic toxicity...🙏🏽
Great video! I agree 💯 percent with what you said in the video, Andrew! I did give all my best effort to the narc marriage, but after the divorce I'm giving my time and effort to me and to other people who mean a lot to me and the relationship is reciprocal. Namaste. ❤️ 🙏 🦋 😊
A thousand times yes! The first spouse got 26 years of fund support, emotional support and help keeping contact with his daughter. It was so damaging to me that I can't separate fact from fallacy in any possible new friendships. I know my family and friends but anyone else, I'm not there yet with the trust. Oh it's possible I'm "Anxious Avoidance Person," for now. I need to stick to my plan of 18 to 24 months to heal. The tragedy of Narcissism is fresh in my mind, I'm happy waiting on the right person to be in my life, later. I spent too many times giving my all the first-time and realized in the second marriage I needed to get out after the first 6 months! I was awesome in both marriages giving g time and effort to a fault while the whole pack of Narcissistic Family members cheated me out of everything they could. Exhausting, unfortunate, and unforgivable is the way I see it. I took the high road both times. Nice to live life on my terms and not be with someone who sucks the life breath and blood out of me. Much Loving-kindness and Warm Hugs Everyone's way! We are getting 1-3 inches of snow tonight/tomorrow in the mid-west! Everyone stay safe out there! 🔥 🙏 ☪ ♥
I gave him everything. My love, understanding, empathy, money. I took great care of him. I cooked for him, cleaned his house. Made breakfast for him in bed. Went anywhere her wanted to go. Now that I'm out of the relationship I remember he would never do anything with me in the town we lived in, always out of town. Rare occasion we would go to the grocery store he would walk 2 feet behind me like he wasn't with me. When we were in the car alone he wanted to hold my hand. I want to remember those kind of actions it helps me stay away. It is like a light bulb when you finally see and feel the evil he was doing.
I now know that this unfortunate short marriage I had with the narc didn't happen to me, it happened for me... So I would learn these valuable lessons, NEVER to repeat them again, and be able to recognize the red flags In case I have the misfortune of meeting another one, so I can RUN THE OTHER WAY 😁😁😁...
Hi Andrew. I feel so sorry for people on here have lost so much in there lives due too the Narc abuse . Finding Andrew has got me though so much watching his videos . Understanding what Narcs are really like , I've found some content and happiness since im now over him !! Thank you lovely Andrrw x
Of course I gave him everything! He pushed my boundaries all over the place as he pleased. Once I was "running on empty", he discarded me (although some narcissists seem to believe that it's a coping mechanism of sorts, a way to end the relationship on their own terms - which seems quite stupid [so there’s a chance it’s true, since we’re talking about narcissists]). And Andrew, you look great! Lots of love from Poland
I always listen to your words and think about it for more than a minute. Now my question is this. I come from a patriarchal society where a son must respect a father. But what about a father who is so selfish he discards even his own kids
I stopped respecting my Dad at a young age. He didn't deserve my respect. He abused my whole family, 5 children & my Mom. My parents divorced when I was 18, best thing for all involved. He's 83 now, has mellowed somewhat, but I still see him for who he is. He's still mentally immature, at the end of his life with not much remorse, if any, from the damage he caused..
Absolutely, that's why it hurt so much when he told me that he was bored with me and and said I was a pathetic loser. All I ever did was show him love and affection. It's been six months and I still am hurting with feelings of desolation and remembering the wonderful times we had. It puts me in a state of conflict, feeling that I didn't do enough.
That’s so weird… I was just on the phone with my friend, and one of the things we talked about _was_ my ex and… let’s just say my uncensored thoughts on him. I definitely gave the best of myself as he gave _nothing_ . I just couldn’t understand _why_ someone would take a person who was kind and giving and full of love and toss all that aside like “a piece of trash on the side of the freeway”. Oh well… it’s not _my_ fault the narc didn’t want to be loved 🤷♀️ but… I aim to please, so… ✌️😁 Anyhows, I hope you had a WONDERFUL day… certainly a much better one than yesterday! Enjoy the rest of your evening! Love you, handsome! XOXOXO 😘💋🥰😍🌹☀️🌟🌎🌙🙌✌️💪🙏🫠🤗😉☺️😇😎🥳❤️💜💖 My friends, I hope you all had a WONDERFUL day as well! Also, just in case there’s anyone here who was at, knows someone who was at or IN the Wings Over Dallas Air Show on Saturday, my sincerest thoughts, prayers, and condolences go out to you all! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
I've been offline for a while. After being homeless for close to three years (thanks to the narc in my life) I spent 15 months of that time in emergency housing. Everything I owned was taken by the narcissist. I mean everything, he even gave away my clothes.
However during my time of homelessness I began building up a supply of household goods, and held on to the hope that I would find a place one day. I'm overjoyed to say that I now have a home. I've been able to fill my place with stuff that has never been seen or touched by that nasty piece of work that is my ex.
Finally a place to call home. Good things came my way. Never give up on hope. Sunshine comes after rain. Life does get better. Keep looking forward with your eyes on the prize, which is happiness and harmony within yourself, (myself) 💙🤗
Delighted for you 🙏🕊🌹
Way to go girl!!!! 🎉
Bless your heart!! You are such a strong and lovely person with the highest level fortitude!! So proud of you and keep us posted with your progress!! Sending love and hugs!!😊❤️💚❤️💞
You are amazing!
Thank you for the inspiration ♡ I wish you all the best💫
Hi Andrew, a resounding yes from me. I gave 100% to my marriage and that's the heartbreaking part, it was never enough. Gave 100% to get scraps of gratitude or recognition whenever he was bothered to be present. He spent 7 nights out seeing 'friends', grabbing supply or being someone's hero while I done my duties at home making his life perfect and comfortable for when he decided to 'visit'. It's amazing how you see it all clearly when you are out of the situation and especially out of the fog. Thank you for all your help with understanding these parasites.
Welcome 🙏🙌☀️💯
Not one single night, can these monsters be alone. It gets worse w age. He was in his late forty sitting around after work w his friends, partying. Free-loading.
You are right! Most exhausting and demeaning relationship ever!
I went thru it too.
No, the narcissist didn't get the best of me. The best is after the break up, where I realized what amazing person I am and how much more I have to look forward to. 🙂
Meanwhile a narcissist will always stay a narcissist. Always unsatisfied.
🙌☀️💯
Exactly. The narc will always be working on getting a fix or snagging more supply. I can't even imagine living that way. Too often as well...we are described as weak people in this situationships. I never felt like a weak person. I remember a lot of other emotions and things though. I was way too damn busy to be weak. There was zero information about these clowns at that time. I've learned so much. You don't 'survive' after being with a narcissist if you are a weak person. You take your own time to heal and process. And you come out stronger than ever before! Very 'clear'. You can smell BS a mile away. Do not ever rush into anything with anyone. Never cast your pearls to a swine. Nobody calls the shots on me. I do. Never, ever feel 'obligated' to respond with a yes ..when your intuition...heart is screaming NO. Namaste 💜💌
We’ll said 🎉❤
👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
DEALING WITH NARC IS LIKE A LONG PENDING DEATH THAT JUST WON'T💛💜 DIE
It took me 50 years to completely understand my father and 3 narc. Relationships. The 3rd was the worst person on the planet.
So true, because it's like walking in a desert and seeing a mirage of water.
The *best* of us _only_ goes to _ourselves_ and those who truly deserve it now ❤️🙏
🙌☀️💪
🥰❤️🙏🙌🦋
@@gratefultobehere 💖🙏
I agree, Louise! 💯 💕 🙏 🦋 😊
@@_Louise__ 🤗🙏❤️🦋 love this message
There are so many of them it's scary. Have everything you do put in writing for the "just incase" moment.
Appreciate you more than you could ever know!
🙌💯🙏
Narcissists have a jezebel spirit. They know exactly what they are doing and they are evil. What they do that is most disturbing is how they treat their adult children. They not only discard you, but they also discard their children and grandchildren.
YES!!!!!!
Before my narc ex gf came into my life I was happy... Had friends, a nice little flat on my own and was settled. Now I'm in debt , having to pay for the apartment that she decided we needed to move too, ive been alienated from some friends, her family that I bonded with and was left in the most narc way ever, being told I love you but I've been sleeping with someone else and I've given you an STI. This is what you get it seems for trying your hardest to love someone with this disorder.. She also tried to get me thrown out of my home, smear campaigned me whilst she was actually with me!, discarded me and returned more times than I care to remember, blamed me for absolutely everything etc etc.. she also took my son to another county and managed to get an injunction against me by lying to the family court, giving false allegations without a single shred of evidence to support her disgusting and outrageous claims.. She basically demonised me for 4 years for not putting up with her bs. It makes me totally sick to my stomach to now know what these people are capable of.. I felt absolutely violated throughout. I'm so glad her poison is finally out of my life, I'm over her.. big time, but I miss my beautiful son and that's her final bullet.
You can and will get back stronger & better. Focus on self love and new ideas. Be Well. U got this💜🌱❣️
She's made it very easy after this last discard to get through this.. The fog is gone and I fully understand now what she is, I guess I should be thankful for that at least right. ❤️
She's just venom wearin' denim
She's a nightmare not a dream
Oh my! You have been through hell. You’re still hanging in there and will get through. Others will see her true colors and you will always have your truth and dignity.
God bless you on your healing path.
It's almost like narcissists are human hunters and they are a wolf in sheep's clothing, laying in wait for when we let our guard down. Stay strong everyone
I think that's a good description. You would think they'd appreciate the trust extended to them, but they prefer to drag people down rather than experience personal growth. You stay strong, too!
🙌☀️🙏
THE BEST OF YOU IS WHAT THE NARCISSIST PLANS TO DESTROY....
😉😉💯
YES!! I norrmally have a lot of energy, but by the time I simply could not take more of the abuse, I was totally drained!!. 25 years later have my energy plus plus back!! Life is wonderful post narc sitting on that peak of indifference.!! Wishing all precious folks in this commuity strength, lots of energy and peace as you trek on the healing path!! Andrew, love your wisdom and sage advice!!❤🤍💚💞💞
Thank you 🙌💯🙏
Thank you, Andrew & community ♥️ Namaste 🙏🏼
Namaste 🙏
The relief for no longer being beholden to them is immense.
The mind games, the drama , the feeling of inferiority leaves along with them . A peaceful life can return , feeling safe and well is possible again .
🙌🙌💯
Yes….Absolutely a Narcissist! Absolutely giving 💯of myself. The abuse is unreal. Sadly!! It’s the hardest thing I have ever had to pull myself away from. I left x 2 - Hardest thing I have ever done. Trauma Bonding is a nightmare. Do give yourself PLENTY of time to heal. There isn’t a timeframe. The Longer your bonded, the harder to break and get away. My heart breaks for anyone who has ever been through this. Thank you Andrew!! ❤
Welcome 🙏🙌☀️💯
@@NARCDAILYYouAreNotAlone - ❤. Videos help. Hardest thing ever to get out of. Just devastating- No one should have to go through this. Ever.
I am hoping it will not take 13 years to bleed it out…the perpetual abuse has left a lot of what seems to be permanent damage to my reactions to things in life. It’s like having to go to recovery to live a normal life again and chisel yourself out again.
@@KadyPowellAEROPOLEONEKD - Same. I have 34+ yrs to overcome. Hoping this will get much better w time. It has, to some degree, but I feel very wounded and hurt still. It’s been hard. Many blessings to you. I understand completely.
@@rubyjet8614 😭😭
I thought I was a smart, savvy and level headed person. I always did the right thing and I always tried to make careful decisions. BUT the Narc that I got mixed up with, was way smarter and more savvy. If I was 2 steps ahead, he was 10 steps ahead. And on top of that, he took advantage of my love for him. He weaponized my love! I still can’t believe that I went through that marriage. Not just a relationship…I married this person! When all the BS gradually happened, I tried to rationalize and I tried to fix things. I blamed myself and I strived to make things better. By the time it was over, I had no clue what hit me. I spent years going over it in my head. Asking myself what I did wrong? Noticing that something was not right with him, something was off…but I could not put my finger on it.
Many years later, I learned what had happened and who I was dealing with after I reluctantly went to therapy with a great Psychologist. I did not want to go but one of my friends kept encouraging me because she saw I struggling with my divorce. Also, another friend revealed that she never liked my ex-husband because he gave her bad vibes but she did not know what to say or how to get involved.
How crazy is that?! To go through such torment and not know what the heck is going on because you lack that specific knowledge. Now that I know, it freaks me out that I was with this person and trusted him. He left me so damaged; emotionally, mentally and financially. I still can’t wrap my mind around it but I’m gradually regaining my peace and happiness. Eventually, I will be whole again, the same way I was before I met him. Until then, I’m watching your videos and other videos. Researching, meditating, coping, etc…Sending good vibes and thank you.
Welcome always 🙏🙌☀️💯
This could have been me word for word..
I'm happy and different now, as Andrew said many times, we are where we need to be, that is so true. It has been very difficult, at times, but it is achievable. I love and trust myself more than I ever have. I take no more unfounded criticism, and I never will..Thank you to Andrew, and everyone who has helped me to this place. Helping me find me ))
Yes. I didn’t have the knowledge, information or a clue what or who I was dealing with. Challenging to fight against when you have no idea what it is. Now that I know….I can figure it out, an do WAY better by putting myself first. Hard stuff when you don’t have info!! Once you know ….. it all makes perfect sense and the tide can change to better!!!
You will get through and find your happiness and peace again - its hard and it hurts - please believe in yourself and a positive future. Xx sending love xxx
@@pinkkittyize sending good vibes pink, I'm in your corner
Courage and commitment had no honor. By my narcissistic ex.
❤️❤️❤️
🙌☀️🙏
a resounding yes from me gave it my all 100% to my narcissistic friendship anyways i cried a little today 😢 could have used a huge hug from you andrew
💟💟💟
☀️🙌🙏
Narcissists feel entitled! To everything that is yours on so many levels ( wrongly!!) until no more, the greatest strength and blessing is to see the light and remember who you are! Thank you Andrew for that video so true! God bless 🙏
🙏🙌☀️💯
Andrew, we who have been through the darknest night of the soul as a side effect of the aftermath of narcissists know we have had our soul renched and thank God got the inner strength to survive and aspire to trive in the the beautiful light that this world can be thank God truly Andrew your vidio s are life affirming in a beautiful way God bless you 🙏☀️🌹
Right you are, I gave the very best of myself for nearly four years to this egoist. Former smokers will relate, there comes a point when one more puff is not even an option. That's where I am with the narc, I had to reach the saturation point. Am now trying to get my groove back. Anyhow, thank you, Andrew. I come to your channel whenever I need a pep talk, and always gain altitude. 🙏🏻
Welcome 🙌☀️🙏
I also gave it my ALL for 5 years. Ended up with a broken 💔..
Reminds me of the song Best of You by The Foo Fighters. It's mindblowing to listen to videos like yours about this and actually live it. It's like a Stephen King novel coming to life out of the pages. I would wonder many times why he would only get so close with me than either start an argument or stonewall me. He did get the best of me. I would try numerous times in so many different ways to make it work. To find out what I was doing wrong when this whole time it wouldn't have mattered what I did or didn't do. He got my best and my smile, too. I hope to smile again someday.
Awesome song! I just looked up the lyrics as I haven't heard it for a while, this line really stood out:
"Were you born to resist or be abused?"
How true is this!!!
Two years out now and I have smiled a few times. The smile will come back!
☀️☀️🙏
If I'd had the wisdom, I definitely would not have spent over 9 years trying my best to please an unempathic malcontent 😂 nor would I have sacrificed to pay for all of his expenses. Yes, I gave my best, while he would rarely even curl his lips upward to give me a smile. The fog was thick. Your teachings remove the fog. Thank you, Andrew! 🌼🌷🍀🌺
Welcome 🙏🙌☀️
Pure gold. You're a ⭐ 🙏❤️
🙌🙏
It was once I realized I HAD given my best, after years of criticism, that I knew it was time to walk away.
🙌💯🙏
I'm in love with your enthusiasm to turn a nightmare experience into a gold glitter spray,
to mark the SS's, aka Smirky Sneaks,
by empowering empathic, emancipated, espionage experts.
Haha!
I like your whole face!
Thank you for sharing your courage.
Thank you 😊🙏🙌
15 years together very devastated and still love her,starting to look on line to figure things out or fix the problem with myself.some days its convincing its her other days not so much, maybe the 15 years of toxic abuse takes its toll, self improving and watching your videos and others is helping, thankyou Andrew! Still feel lost, but its only been a few months of discovery, in the process of discard, i believe.
Sending healing energy ☀️🙌🙏
@@NARCDAILYYouAreNotAlone thank you
@ married
For 13
Know exactly what you mean. I am working on this daily. Some steps ahead, a few steps back. This is how it goes for me but I can feel myself getting better. Hang in there!
Ditto! So true!
ABSOLUTLY!! Yes! But now I give myself MY best. If there are leftovers - I’ll share. 😉
Am I the only one who’s witnessing a rebirth of your genuine smile?!?! It must be a bonus perk of following you. Stay strong! Namaste 🙏
Namaste 🙏😊😊
Yes, the narcissist was getting the best of us … and we gave the best of us to please them , and try to make things work ..we did it with our heart, our love … in vain … so much disappointment and waste of energy each time 😔
Thank you Andrew for your video and happy to see you smile at the end of the video today 😁🙏You’re brave 💪
☀️🙌💯🙏
My first encounter with a narc was my first husband. He discarded me right after we had a baby girl. He kept everything we had from the marriage, the money from our large wedding, household and two cars. What a piece of garbage that man is. I was 23 years old and did not know what hit me. Thank God Andrew for the wisdom. My whole life has been a magnet for narcissists, and I am happy to say I am free today. One of the posts I read on the channel was “are there any people who are NOT narcissists? I can relate to that statement! 😮 Stay alert, test the spirits.
i called off the engagement, thank you God
🙌💯
You have an awesome day or night as well Andrew as you are doing a great job as just knowing we are not alone is inspiring.🇭🇲❤
🙏💯🙌☀️
Thank you Andrew narcissists are horrible people. Namaste. 🙏❤️🎶🌏
Namaste 🙏
I said goodbye to him yesterday forever. He cried. I turned away and didn't look back . FREE 🤗👣❤🇦🇺
😉😉💪💯
Andrew I hope you are feeling much better today, 🇨🇮🙏🙏🙏🙏
💯😊☀️
I started deleting all the crazy emails from narc at work and making a list of their crazy behavior
I knew I had given everything I had to give, when I literally had nothing left.
💯💯☀️
Last year I bought all the Christmas gifts for all the family and got absolutely nothing in return! His loss! I left in February and can officially file for divorce in 3 months. Good riddance!
💪💪🙌
Oh yes definitely gave my best. And everything you said from all the public praising in front of large and small audiences to the private behind the door belittling. Never knowing is it Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde. Now that I think back maybe I should have taken notes that was one of his favorite things to watch in the engagement season (forgot about that til now). He picked the queen caretaker and codependent high achiever. He knew exactly what he was doing (as I now know ALL narcissists KNOW what they are doing) - and as soon as I saw a tear drop I was digging my heels in deeper to alleviate any amount of struggle or pain on his end. It is NOT reciprocated and I did not even know I never learned to love myself right. Learning now. Humbled more and more by a lifetime of this cycle, but I’m not having shame now - just digging my heels in for me and learning and fighting for me. They don’t deserve us. They don’t. I wish I could help those still trauma bonded. It’s a slow painful death and I pray anyone attached GETS OUT.
Great message Andrew and loved seeing your smile.
Thank you 🙏🙌☀️😊
Agree, it was lovely to see Andrew smiling again 🥰
@@_Louise__ 💖🙏🦋
Best wishes 🙌💟💟💟
A long time ago I took a hard line on taking responsibility, as much as I could. Radically. I wasn’t born that way but my life got so far out of control that in order to reel it in, I had to radically take responsibility for everything that I could to avoid ever going down that dark path again. Being at the mercy of circumstances did not appeal to me one bit. I realized how not everyone is like this the hard way, at the hands of the narcissist but I still take the hard line, being responsible but now I never expect this from anyone else. Although I like to think that as a prerequisite the person that I will be the closest to will have to take the same hard line on responsibility as I do, at least as my equal.
🙏🙌☀️
I couldn't agree more...there were a handful of people who offered to help me year's ago when I was at my lowest. And they too had an agenda. I'm so happy those dark days are behind me. The needless suffering and the dysfunction of our global society really started making sense to me after all these painful lessons. Brighter days ahead for humanity 💜🙏💌
Thank you Andrew, I needed to hear this. Yeh my narcopath used to leave for hrs and yes wouldnt answer his phone. And yep would leave. I'm glad I heard your message today. I'm still healing. My friend says to move on but listening to u helps me everyday. Thank you for your videos
Welcome 🙌☀️🙏
Now, I remember your, "First, Second, Third", and I smile🥰. Freedom Rocks, and better late than never❣️. Thank you so much, Andrew. I always need the reminders even solidly in Version 3.
💯💯💯
How sad, right? The person who least deserved anything is the one we gave some of the best years of our life to😢😢 The energy that could have been put to a much better purpose, to make a difference and spread more love and light got sucked into the bottomless pit that is the narcissist.
🙌💯🙏
For a while. Until you wake up and realize they're actually bringing out the worst in you. After you realize that the game is OVER
Maybe I endured---
ALL OF THE ABOVE.
Living my best life just begun. Thank you Andrew and all who sent me a positive thought.
I am grateful
☀️🙌🙏
Your a beautiful person Andrew , you done great tonight, you described everything I went thru , for me it was too bad I was in a fog of lies, after the divorce months after he came back , I did cry then we parted , few yrs. past he tried it again but this time I rejected his return, now the thought of it makes me sick & dodge him when I know he's around- may Yeshua give you deep peace in you're mind, heart & spirit, & renewed strength & continuous healing in every way you need it most, not only to you but all who are watching- Shalom & Thank You too!!! 🔥💙🙏😉
Welcome always 🙏💯☀️
Im some years into single life but im beyond tired i feel beaten and i have no idea how to ever find the strenght completly back again. While i were with the narc i also lost both familymembers and friends to death and i was grieving but without any love from the man that claimed that he loved me. I never knew about narcissism before him and i have learned so much through you Andrew so Thank you so much for all that you do ❤️❤️❤️
Welcome 🙌☀️🙏
I'm also single for a long time, but at least I'm no longer with a narc. Good luck to you! ⚘️
@@jannlewandowski5540 Yes Thank god for that ❤️ How are you feeling today ?
Oo yes. Lately looked at all the scenarios where I used to feel so sad .miserable ..drained yet he could see it and didn't care. The pics I took in those years show so much pain in my face
I am out of it9months now and I am grateful to have channel like yours
Thankyou
Welcome 🙏🙌☀️
It’s weird how we gave the best to them, and when the relationship ended it took us every single day for a year to reflect and do the inner work to heal, while they couldn’t give a toss and are probably playing their games with new supply. We suffered, they don’t care at all. It has also ruined my trust in dating again, just can’t do it anymore.
Hi Bianca. You may feel differently about dating later. I like men. They're out there.
Divine timing
Your not ready your finding your true self and getting stronger❤️your beautiful. 🕊🕊🕊
💯💯😉
Great video Andrew as always. You know I gave everything I had to my ex narc just like you did. He did not appreciate it much I am sure. But you know what, my biggest reward today besides being free of him is the idea that one day I will meet the right person, a kind, loving human being and I will have the healthiest relationship I always wanted. I read today this quote from Oprah; " Every one of us gets through the tough times because somebody is there, standing in the gap to close it for us" You look stronger today Andrew, i am happy to see that. We are all pulling for you on the channel to see you get through this trying time. I am sending love your way. Have a lovely evening. 😘🫂♥
Thank you for sharing 🙌💯🙏☀️
Yikes
When ever I got a sliver of hope and spend my day overly excited that possible she made a change that was a lie she would pull the rug right out from under me ! Painful I'm truly thankful I don't give to her at all just to myself and my daughter and my 2 grandsons great video Andrew
Glad to have caught this one godbless you and all of your friends
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Andrew, great to see that smile today❤
💯😊☀️
YES! YES! YES! AND YES!!!! I gave him so so much more than he deserved and more chances and he just took and took and like an idiot I didn’t say no. Until I finally did at the end of August 2022. Then I met you Andrew by chance and now I know and now I see the red flags 🚩 so clear. What was wrong with me??? I’m happy he is finally out of my life but I’m struggling with the disappointment in myself. I’m struggling with the aftermath pain. It hurts to realize I was used for being a kind human a loving forgiving person. He took advantage of all that makes me me. How could I dance with the devil like that ???? It’s good to see you smile today Andrew. Thank you and thanks to everyone in the group for sharing kind helpful advice. I appreciate a kind safe place to vent. So thanks everyone ✌🏻❤
I did the same Rebecca. Going on 4 years away from that mess. Don't be so hard on yourself. They are wolves in sheep's clothing. Takers, Users. They knew exactly what they were doing. Predators! You never needed him. Take care of you!
Thank you for sharing 🙏🙌☀️
Yea this resonated deeply , he hated that I was independent financially and a good life with family and friends. He was miserable 95percent of the time , he was always the victim, I gave💯💯💯💯 but to no avail, I never lost touch with my life outside of him I had other responsabilites, .all the encouragement and compassion and support ,I went as far as I could ,then suddenly I Left,
🙌☀️💯
Glad your feeling better, I find so much healing in your time. Listening to you helps me more than my therapist andrew
Thank you 🙏🙌☀️
I gave more then the best of me, I stayed at home taking care of the house hold. Just like I do now, but I do it for myself. I give myself the best of me now. 😁 I think he knew he was losing control of me, when I took a side job to help a nice church lady to clean her house.
God bless ya Andrew for your great videos and the words and God bless everyone else in the community. 👃😁
Thank you ☀️🙌🙏💯
Great to see you today.
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Always thank you Andrew.
Welcome 🙏
My weakness was I couldn’t say no. God has sent a drug addict, a narcissist and a sociopath with his vulture family. I learned to say no. Say no quickly and with authority
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Andrew, you nailed it! I never knew anyone would act that way and turn on me the way he did. I was so naïve I thought everyone thought like me.
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Yes, they all got the most sincere, loyal dedication & love from me. It took a lot of life lessons for me to learn how to recognize disingenuous people & avoid them. I am very glad that I finally don't have any of them in my life. I'm proud of myself for refusing to spend time with one of them who was visiting near me and wanted to meet for lunch. But she got her sister who I have no problem with to contact me & make plans only to slip in, "Oh, by the way, Dot (former frenemy) will be with me" routine. I declined, she tried to pressure me, I declined again & again & then I simply shut down the chat. Thankfully the people-pleaser part of me is gone. Yes, I give my best to people. That is why I have learned to be very selective of who gets my time & energy.
Thanks for another great video. I hope you are doing well tonight. Hope everyone is peaceful & well. It's just cool enough here tonight to drop the windows down & listen to the night.
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Welcome 🙌☀️🙏
Yup, this is so true. 💙
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🦋🦋🦋 God bless you Andrew
Thank you
Welcome 🙏
It still amazes me how the human brain can become so damaged to cause some people to behave in such a way as to spread their evil ways into society.
The DSM-V manual should be a book all high school students need to be exposed to. The earlier the better. TY Andrew~
Welcome 🙏
You say so much when you say the third version of you. Thank you, Andrew!
Oh my yes , you said everything to the T . Why did it take me do many heats to see the truth. I just couldn’t accept it . I had two Narcissist. My husband & my daughter . Now he has dementia or Alzheimer’s. I even cared for him . But now she is taking care of her father . I used up all of me & finances & resources . So now she is caring for her father two narcissist living with one another . He is now her grade A supply & immediately put all his finances in her name as his fiduciary , medical & financial power of attorney. . Oh yes she would say that if you do this then I will do thus . I saw many red flags. They came more frequently & that’s how I caught it .
I have been single since 1989 . I gave my very best & it’s taken so long to heal & Im still not completely healed. I don’t date . I refuse in fear of attracting another narcissist. I’m sorry but I feel like I will never be healed from all the damage that’s been done so they win. It’s contrary to my faith but it’s how I feel . I chose to be single . I go out to eat by myself. I go to the movies by myself . I go to church by myself ❤I do everything by myself . I’m ok with me . I’m ok with healing time 33 years later . It’s like I ended with the father but restarted with the daughter . Oh my . I was a glutton yo be abused .
Thank you for sharing 🙏🙌☀️
I agree with everything you said Andrew. Thank you. I gave the best of me to the narcisists until I didn’t. I came to a point when I was done. My heart made a decision that I am unable to have anything to do with the evil narcisists operate under the influence of. Blessed was that day! God bless you Andrew.
Welcome 🙏🙌☀️
Thankyou for your insight, as ever.
I always felt that my soon-to-be ex husband’s behaviour was normal because of my upbringing with a narcissistic mother. This channel has opened my eyes to the evil behaviour of a narcissist. Now to avoid this going forward…. 💛
Welcome ☀️🙌💯
I enjoy , you are rolling like a champ.
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Many times he gave me compliments...but he never sad that i was a good person. He sad to me that i was no sweet and too hot to handle..in conflict he sad that i was crazy in front of my kids. Sometimes i see him in the neighbourhood and i hate him to see him smile to me and say hello
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I know exactly what you are talking about 🙂 if I knew then what I know now! the Narc wouldn’t of seen me for dust ! Enjoy your evening Andrew. ❤️
Thank you 💯🙌🙏
@@NARCDAILYYouAreNotAlone 💚
Can you give us your amazing smile at the end of all videos?? It’s so nice for us and will surely lift you toward happier times. Hugs 🤗
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Hello my beautiful empath's you got this stay strong.🕊️
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He got the best of me, more than my daughter. Even though she's forgiven me, the guilt haunts me to this day.
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I gave 100% of myself to her and after 7years we bought a house and i found that it is when we bought the house i started to see the difference from her. Like always i was a yes person and just ignore the red flags but as sons grew older and started to make their voices heard i started to see more of her true self but i push it aside. She always wanted to do something on the week, always going out every weekend and sometimes myself and the kids didn't want to do anything on a weekend. Now this is when she removes her mask and started rage fit and putting word like we are boring (devaluing me and the kids) we never want to do anything with her (like because 1 weekend we decided we we're not interested) and the best playing the victim card to make us feel bad because we didn't to do anything just for 1 day. She put so much drama that in the end of argument she told me i was being dramatic. I was the one staying home more often to take care of the kids, the house, the household chores and she would not put an ounce of energy to help me most of the time. Today what is more important to her it is called Phone, agenda, work, dog and the new supply. Thank you for getting me out of that fog Andrew. Namaste and we stay strong.
Welcome always 🙏🙌💯☀️💯
I stay busy all day, and I love my life. I can’t wait to view your videos daily. I absolutely love your channel. Thank you for your fabulous life-changing teachings. And yes I was doing all the work! 😢. I actually made homemade tortillas etc., and this went on for year, and of course the narcissist was happy. I was supplying all his needs. But I’m glad to say that those days are gone. Now I can spot red flags red flags 🚩 🚩! I’m glad that we discovered the term narcissist and the experience was horrific. I’m so different now. I’m not the same person that I was yesterday. I’m different!
Welcome 🙏🙌☀️💯
You always get overwhelmed by these people you don't exist at the same level of reality as them, you can lower yourself to their level for a little while and temporarily beat them at their own game but it will make you sick to your soul if you keep it up for long. They plan their petty existence like a general going to war and never stop and it's very dark stuff. The only real way you "win" with these people is to not be anywhere near them.
You said it!
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I handled the discard from my ex far from elegant but Im beginning to catch on learning from the community. Thank you
Welcome 🙏
He took everything from me. I'm still struggling to come to terms with this.
Everything? No he didn't
Your here to tell your story. Your awesome.🕊🕊🕊❤️
Sending healing energy 🙏🙌😊
Indeed the Narc will always try to strip you down to nothing!!!! That’s the personality trait of Narcissism while the real truth is that idiot is nothing more but a bully, intimidate, condescending and drag you down to his /her level! Remember misery loves company
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Another change in the routine... Improvise adapt and overcome...
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Spot on and accurate! No matter how much you do, it’s never good enough. You sacrifice, you love unconditionally, you accept all their behavior and rage fits an chalk it up to their terrible childhood, until the day comes when you feel you will drop from the stress, pain, and torture you are feeling inside. Thank you, Andrew for all you do and I hope you are hanging in there with the last couple of days being so emotional for you. I also wanted to ask everyone in the community if they have ever seen this with their child being with a narcissist? My wonderful son is about to move 100’s of miles away from (NH to NC)with his narc gf and I feel so defeated. I’ve been through it and now my baby is going through it but has no idea what she is. Any advice please, will help. God bless and stay strong everyone 🙏💕
The problem is that if you say anything he will alienate you. It's a tough spot to be in!
@@emilywilson7308 exactly!! I don’t want him to end up resenting me 😔
@@TamsNH you would be the bad guy.😞
Stay in touch with your son. He may need you. Keep it light without judgement. Time will see you through. Keep going your loved. ❤️🕊🕊🕊🕯🕯🕯❤️💫
@@emilywilson7308 very true
Everything you say is so true. I have so many bad memories of things they did or tried to do. Those of us who are away from them and their evil clutches are truly blessed. Watching these videos each day, I count my blessings that I am here and free at last. Thanks so much Andrew. Much 💘 love.
Welcome 🙏🙌☀️
Hi Andrew hope you’re having a better day today.❤You’re videos as always hit home. I tried and tried and tried until I was blue in the face to please this person and nothing was enough ever. He wore me out mentally, emotionally, and physically. He was literally killing me with his erratic behavior and bs. For me the hard part is the breadcrumbs moments of happiness that I held onto so tightly, praying things would change that has made this discard so tough. I will never ever allow this to happen again. Thank you for your commitment to us. I can’t wait to get off work to watch your videos, you are helping me see the progress I am making and that I never deserved that treatment. Neither did you! You are a rare soul with a heart of gold. Thank you so much. Have a great night. ❤️❤️🙏🙏❤️❤️
Welcome always 🙏☀️☀️
Yes,I give my best and the rest,with little to nothing in return .
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Andrew, so sorry to see you hurting this way. I know all of us want to help and do whatever we can. WE LOVE YOU, AND ALWAYS WILL. YOU ARE IN PAIN, AND YET YOU ARE HERE FOR US. WE ARE ALL HERE FOR YOU. WE LOVE YOU...❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
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Thanks again Andrew for sharing your wisdom and hi beautiful community!! I myself was never aware of the full extent how damaged/evil my ex-partner was until as early as last-year. I gave All of myself to my ex-partner, and was given intermittently 'breadcrumbs of hope' in return for 5 years. My family who she never made any time nor effort for, had a strong sense something was abnormal, whilst I was spoon-fed lie, upon lie upon lie. I never felt good enough within the 5 year relationship and Always felt my very best was never good enough that has crushed my self-worth. No matter how hard I 'proved' myself to her by jumping through her hoops, they became higher & higher & higher to the brink of suicide. And more unrealistic to attain. It's been 3 months since I was discarded, like I have been innumerable times before. But now it seems final. Now I am being blamed for giving the bare-minimum, being equally to blame for the demise of the relationship. I loath myself for still loving her and being full of self-doubt over my part to play, also feeling extremely guilty for its tragic ending. Since I was told by a mental health practitioner last-year based on my symptoms, my ex-partner has a boarderline personality disorder that corresponded to what she herself told me towards the end of 2020 by a health professional, the abuse has been acutely reactive. I miss my step-son that words cannot describe who he sees me more of a dad than his own biological, narcissistic father. And despite we as a family having countless conversations in relation to me Always playing a part in his life if he wishes me to, his mom has stopped all contact between us. I feel dead inside that my intuition tells me this is how she feels towards herself. I'm terrified of what my future has in store for me. I feel I somehow deserved all of this day-in-day-out, chronic toxicity...🙏🏽
No one deserves narc abuse. You can't blame yourself! Try to be your own best friend and treat yourself with loving respect.
The trauma bond is worse than drug addiction. You are going cold turkey. No contact is vital. Stay strong!
Sending healing energy 🙏🙌☀️
Great video! I agree 💯 percent with what you said in the video, Andrew! I did give all my best effort to the narc marriage, but after the divorce I'm giving my time and effort to me and to other people who mean a lot to me and the relationship is reciprocal. Namaste. ❤️ 🙏 🦋 😊
Namaste 🙌☀️🙏💯
I hope you are well today Andrew and thank you for making this video today 🙏😃🤗 I really appreciate you 🙏
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A thousand times yes! The first spouse got 26 years of fund support, emotional support and help keeping contact with his daughter. It was so damaging to me that I can't separate fact from fallacy in any possible new friendships. I know my family and friends but anyone else, I'm not there yet with the trust. Oh it's possible I'm "Anxious Avoidance Person," for now. I need to stick to my plan of 18 to 24 months to heal. The tragedy of Narcissism is fresh in my mind, I'm happy waiting on the right person to be in my life, later.
I spent too many times giving my all the first-time and realized in the second marriage I needed to get out after the first 6 months! I was awesome in both marriages giving g time and effort to a fault while the whole pack of Narcissistic Family members cheated me out of everything they could. Exhausting, unfortunate, and unforgivable is the way I see it. I took the high road both times. Nice to live life on my terms and not be with someone who sucks the life breath and blood out of me.
Much Loving-kindness and Warm Hugs Everyone's way! We are getting 1-3 inches of snow tonight/tomorrow in the mid-west! Everyone stay safe out there! 🔥 🙏 ☪ ♥
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I gave him everything. My love, understanding, empathy, money. I took great care of him. I cooked for him, cleaned his house. Made breakfast for him in bed. Went anywhere her wanted to go. Now that I'm out of the relationship I remember he would never do anything with me in the town we lived in, always out of town. Rare occasion we would go to the grocery store he would walk 2 feet behind me like he wasn't with me. When we were in the car alone he wanted to hold my hand. I want to remember those kind of actions it helps me stay away. It is like a light bulb when you finally see and feel the evil he was doing.
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I now know that this unfortunate short marriage I had with the narc didn't happen to me, it happened for me... So I would learn these valuable lessons, NEVER to repeat them again, and be able to recognize the red flags In case I have the misfortune of meeting another one, so I can RUN THE OTHER WAY 😁😁😁...
Yep… I didnt find myself back after I gave it all…. 😢. Thank you for your videos. Helps me.
Welcome 🙌🙏
Hi Andrew. I feel so sorry for people on here have lost so much in there lives due too the Narc abuse .
Finding Andrew has got me though so much watching his videos .
Understanding what Narcs are really like , I've found some content and happiness since im now over him !!
Thank you lovely Andrrw x
Welcome 🙏🙌☀️
@@NARCDAILYYouAreNotAlone
Take care lovely x
Of course I gave him everything! He pushed my boundaries all over the place as he pleased. Once I was "running on empty", he discarded me (although some narcissists seem to believe that it's a coping mechanism of sorts, a way to end the relationship on their own terms - which seems quite stupid [so there’s a chance it’s true, since we’re talking about narcissists]).
And Andrew, you look great! Lots of love from Poland
I'm also Polish! Hope you're doing better. It took me 2 years to get over him, but I made it. Good luck to you! ⚘️
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OMG . Everything you say is so true
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Bizzaro World.. perfectly put !!
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I always listen to your words and think about it for more than a minute. Now my question is this. I come from a patriarchal society where a son must respect a father. But what about a father who is so selfish he discards even his own kids
Sending healing energy 🙏🙌☀️
All children deserve parents but not all parents deserve children....
I stopped respecting my Dad at a young age. He didn't deserve my respect. He abused my whole family, 5 children & my Mom. My parents divorced when I was 18, best thing for all involved. He's 83 now, has mellowed somewhat, but I still see him for who he is. He's still mentally immature, at the end of his life with not much remorse, if any, from the damage he caused..
Absolutely, that's why it hurt so much when he told me that he was bored with me and and said I was a pathetic loser. All I ever did was show him love and affection. It's been six months and I still am hurting with feelings of desolation and remembering the wonderful times we had. It puts me in a state of conflict, feeling that I didn't do enough.
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That’s so weird… I was just on the phone with my friend, and one of the things we talked about _was_ my ex and… let’s just say my uncensored thoughts on him. I definitely gave the best of myself as he gave _nothing_ . I just couldn’t understand _why_ someone would take a person who was kind and giving and full of love and toss all that aside like “a piece of trash on the side of the freeway”. Oh well… it’s not _my_ fault the narc didn’t want to be loved 🤷♀️ but… I aim to please, so… ✌️😁
Anyhows, I hope you had a WONDERFUL day… certainly a much better one than yesterday! Enjoy the rest of your evening! Love you, handsome! XOXOXO 😘💋🥰😍🌹☀️🌟🌎🌙🙌✌️💪🙏🫠🤗😉☺️😇😎🥳❤️💜💖
My friends, I hope you all had a WONDERFUL day as well! Also, just in case there’s anyone here who was at, knows someone who was at or IN the Wings Over Dallas Air Show on Saturday, my sincerest thoughts, prayers, and condolences go out to you all! ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
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Have a wonderful day too 🙌💟💟💟