Your Worst Moment WIth A Toilet (r/AskReddit)
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The worst experience I've had with a toilet is when I clogged it
This.
Also nice pfp, Gardevoir is my favorite pokemon
same-
Did you just reply to your own comment?
@@TommyElijahCabelloReal nah they're different profile pics actually I think (can't tell if it's a joke or not, sorry if o misunderstand it ^^;)
Don't forget when you flush it and it overflows and then the brown trout Escape
I turned around to watch it flush and the public toilet water was so high pressure, a droplet flew up into my eye. That was super gross
F
Taylor Murphy I heard from a video that bacteria from a toilet can “fly” a really far distance when flushed. Ever since then I leave before the toilet can fully touch
F
F
you have the mega aids now
I don’t think I’ve ever laughed so hard at a reddit video
Emily Ellsworth I think you will love the burger kings talking trash can story then
It right here th-cam.com/video/4Ipgf9vjqoM/w-d-xo.html
Same
Proves poop jokes are superior eh?
Me too! Aren’t we mean for laughing at another persons misfortune!? 😂🤣😆
0:02 “not me but a friend of mine”
Yeah ok buddy...
Lol
Lol
Lol
Lol
lol
Nothing is more scarier than going to someone's house for the first time and clogging the toilet and theres no plunger in the bathroom 😳
😢
friend? bad enough
first date? just let me die 😂
Sounds like you have done that a lot
When you finally get Reddit and there's no robot voice reading posts
Lol
Kyle #MSDSTRONG '20 I hear the robot voice in my head when I read Reddit posts now
Hes not even that bad and I just corrected a word he used incorrectly but it makes it fun
Just like riding a bike without training wheels for the first time.
I haven’t logged into Reddit in years. Each “subreddit” is basically an echo chamber.
I was 16. On a boat that had the tiniest toilet I'd ever seen and was only able to flush human waste and small amounts of toilet paper. You were supposed to flush while you were taking a crap. It was 6:30 in the morning and still dark when people had started getting up to take a morning piss. I was on this boat for a week and had been avoiding having to take a shit but it had been a 2 days and I could not hold it in for much longer. I sit on this toilet that my ass barely fits on and do my business. Except, I forgot to flush while shitting and when I stood up to flush the toilet it would not go down. Instead, the water started to RUSE and proceeded to turn into the most pigmented BROWN I ever saw. The water was right to the run and the thing is when you flush it makes the loudest fucking noise so it was obvious I was having toilet problems. I was in there panicking for 10 minutes until the water finally became clear, but still to the rim. I just hurried back to my bunk and went back to sleep. But I swear to God, as that toilet water was rising, my anxiety was rising twice as fast.
You’re gonna love the toilets on the ISS
4:38 that entire one uses the most colourful expressions for their experience. Could even call their story 50 shades of brown.
Yeah, they could be an author!
The level of euphemisms for poop/pooping in this video is astounding and awesome!
was just gonna type that but you beat me to it. My downstairs neighbor must think I've had a psychotic break from all the laughing I was doing
I was at university a couple of weeks ago, needed to crap so went into the stall in one of the nicer bathrooms. Calmly go about my business then hear the sound of someone absolutely annihilating the toilet in the next stall. After a minute or so I hear crying coming from the stall, poor guy probably should've checked he was alright.
My worst experience with a toilet was having explosive gassy diarrhea at my own birthday party and everyone hearing the sounds of my sharting whenever I took a bathroom break every 15 minutes. My batshit drunk sister in law then proceeded to publicly humiliate me for my diarrhea and threw my presents around the room (she’s a violent and angry drunk) and made fun of every other person in the room, getting offended and throwing another huge fit when someone tried to tell her to calm down.
Not really the toilet’s fault or anything but it really was the worst timing for watery shit to build up 60mph pressure at my ass’s entrance and my birthday has been completely ruined, including several friendships with some of the people there.
I am so sorry. Did your friendships end because of your diarrhea or your psycho sister in law? Either way it was not your fault.
Hehe 60miles per hour poop
I like the sound of that
Also RIP to your birthday presents🙏🏼😭
If you had a 60mph shit I wouldn’t be surprised if you went airborne.
Also your SIL sounds like a damn lunatic.
I hate using public toilets, to the point where I'd hold it in until I'm home. 6th grade camp comes around, everyone's inside this large locked hall. It's 2am, and everyone's asleep in their sleeping bags, except for me. I've been lying awake for the past 3 hours, just praying that the feeling of my bladder bursting would subside enough to fall asleep and not worry about it anymore. That never happened.
I got up, tippy toed to the camp counselor on the other side of the hall and asked him if I could go to the bathroom. He unlocked the door for me and I tippy toed real fast to the outside toilet. I unleashed the flood gates. All over the toilet seat and floor around the toilet. But good God did it feel great. I still feel guilty for whoever went in after me, and whoever had to clean it up.
3:55
This is probably my favorite. Its fucking hilarious and the wording is on point💀
aRmY? ;o
ok now to what i was actually gonna say:
i had to keep pausing cuz i was laughing so damn hard xD By far my favorite story haha
The disaster didn’t happen on the toilet but it was before I got there, but whatever.
About a year and a half ago, I was really sick, but didn’t feel that bad so I went somewhere with my mum.
She (still) plays Pokemon Go and was doing a “raid” on the app, and as it started, I feel the urge to throw up and my mom, not really looking concerned as I usually say this without actually doing it, says “go near the drain” and just before I get there, I throw up on the pavement. And it was probably, to this day, the most I’ve thrown up.
And the thing I fear the most happened.
I had diarrhoea.
And I shat myself and it felt literally like liquid as my jeans soaked it up and you could see my jeans slowly darkening from the shit.
I finish throwing up, still a look of fear on my face and I waddle over to my mum about a meter away and quietly whisper and point down to my trousers “mum. I, uhh,- you know how I had diarrhoea? Yeah, um. I’ve shit myself.”
She had a look of horror on her face, yet stayed quiet as there were 40+ people around.
The raid ended and people were leaving and, as a fucking hero that knew exactly what to do, phoned my aunt who offered to give me a pair of leggings and underwear to change into.
My aunt came to save the day, and me and my mum walk to the hospital (closest bathroom) and as I’m getting changed in the stall, in the PUBLIC bathroom, the entire bathroom reeks the second I take off my trousers, it’s the worst smell my mother has smelt to date apparently, and it takes about half an hour to clean myself with tissues and wet wipes that my aunt also provided.
Props to the nurse who walked in the go to the toilet next to the worst smelling stall ever.
And props to the jeans that was clean after about three washes that I still own.
Yeah, if you feel ill, do NOT go out, it literally felt like someone cut a small hole in the middle of a straw and put stuff in the straw and blew through the middle hole so the stuff goes flying through the holes in the straw. It sucks and it’s gross. And don’t play Pokemon Go.
I haven't laughed this good in ages. This video needs a part 2... or in this case a number 2 bwahaha xD
Literally!
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
One time I did a massive poop in the toilet, I’m talking the size of a tennis ball. I flushed the toilet, and about 15 minutes later my dad finds bits of poop in my garden. I blocked the toilet again a few months later for the same reason, except nobody found poop in my garden. All of this happened a few years ago so I don’t remember much.
Edit: Oh yeah, and I just remembered that I needed to use the toilet so badly that I started pooping on the way there. The toilet was in another country and it was in a farm so it was pretty dirty so I stood up to pee, and they had no tissues so we had to bring our own. I ended up with half of my poop and piss in the toilet and the other half on the floor. I had and still have great experiences with my toilet, we’re like best friends. 😊
What the hell lmao😂
Honestly sounds like a dream you mixed up with something that really happened.
I find it sad that there were enough stories to make a near 20 minute video. But hilarious at the same time
Oh boy, have I got a story.
When I was about 15 years old, I was late for an appointment in the city one day; I had already had a pretty stressful morning, and while my mom was driving us there I couldn’t stop thinking about how constipated I was, and that I didn’t want to sit through my appointment with that awful feeling so we had to stop and get some laxatives NOW!
My mom reluctantly pulled over and bought some prune juice at the store, and I drank it. I drank a lot of it. At least 2/3 of a big bottle of prune juice. Unfortunately, I ended up missing my appointment, because I was already having a bad day and at that point I was so upset I was crying, so we went home.
On the boat ride back to my house, I started feeling the effects. I rushed to the ferry bathroom and spent at least 5 minutes on the toilet experiencing the worst diarrhea of my life. An hour or so later, more diarrhea.
And then more the next hour. And the hour after that and the hour after that, etc. etc.
Overall, I spent about 12-18 hours shitting myself to death after drinking almost an entire bottle of prune juice. I felt completely empty afterwards and unusually light, and I had learned a very important lesson; do not, no matter how desperate you are for relief, drink 2/3 of a big bottle of prune juice to get rid of constipation.
This year in seventh grade I had to go badly in the bathroom, so I went. A kid I knew walked in to the stall next to me and dropped Hiroshima’s bomb, I couldn’t breath. He sounded horrible but as I left my stall he goes “ I needs toilet paper.” Not wanting a kid walking out with an unwiped ass, I gave him toilet paper. After words he tries to give me a hug and I ran out. Never saw him the same
My worst toilet moment: I went out shopping to Joann Fabrics one day. It was summer, and the shorts I was wearing had *very* shallow back pockets. I had just gotten a new phone (my most expensive phone I've ever had, it was soooo nice, only had it about 3 days) and I wasn't used to how it sat in my pocket. So I sit down and take a MASSIVE dump. When I stood up... My phone fell from my back pocket, right into the toilet on top of the giant turd I'd just dropped. Cue panic - I yelled "Aah! Uhh, ahhh grosssssss!" and reached in lightning fast to grab my phone. I left the stall and grabbed paper towels to dry it off, I dried every crevice and then opened the battery compartment to be sure it was dry. Thankfully it didn't have a drop of anything in there. I put it back together, then used my spray hand sanitizer on a paper towel to wipe down the whole phone about 10 times in a row. I've been in thr bathroom for almost 30 minutes at this point, and my some miracle no one else has entered the bathroom. After I washed my hands I remembered to go back and flush the toilet, washed my hands and sanitized again (and again) and again. My phone was fine, it never had any issues at all with anything. This was several years ago.
I was on a trip to Egypt to fight an old enemy of one of my friends, and when we passed through India there was a toilet with a pig in it
Is that a motherfucking Jojo reference?! XD
The worst story I've ever heard is a really embarrassing one from a friend. He and his mate went to the gym one evening, and my mate was complaining about how his stomach was a bit off before leaving. The other friend brushed it off and they left. As they got to the gym, my friend started working out but suddenly felt the immediate urge to shit. He tried to open the bathroom but it was locked. Turns out he needed a key code which his friend had. He got the code and entered the bathroom, he enters a random stall, quickly taking off his jeans and pulling down his boxers in a hurry. As he does his phone slips out of his pocket into the toilet bowl. Not that bad you think? The toilet already had a fresh shit laying in with murky yellow water. He had to fish out his phone with his hand, all while holding in the massive shit that was about to unleash. Needless to say he went home straight afterwards and cleaned his phone thoroughly 😂😂
Those keycodes are an awful idea what if you really needed the bathroom.
I went to visit my family a couple years back in Mexico, and proceeded to clog my aunts toilet, so instead of telling her ( she’s scary as hell) I decided to scoop the very big shit into toilet paper, and put it into the trash can nearby. In the end, I ended up telling my mom, who told my aunt, and I still wonder if she ever smelled the shit wafting out of the trash. Sorry aunt.
As someone who has had sickness and “butt gravy”, I can identify with the person at 4.05. Not a pleasant experience💩🤮
Same. Not fun. Especially when you're running to the bathroom and have to quickly decide which end to stick into the toilet because you just can't hold either end closed.
Story 1: I was 12. It was a Wednesday. My mom didn't feel like cooking before church so it was a fend for yourself night. Since I had already had a peanut butter sandwich earlier for lunch at school, I decided to experiment. I prepared a roll up. Lunch meat ham, shredded cheese, saltine crackers, and taco hot sauce in a tortilla. It didn't even taste good, but I ate it. Later when we arrive at church, my stomach starts rumbling. A lot. I decide that I urgently need to use the bathroom and choose the most secluded one in the church. As I pull my pants down and start to sit on the thrown, diahrea shoots out of my butt like a water gun all over the toilet, floor and walls. For some reason it had chunks of red, green, and brown mixed in with it. I'm 18 and have never seen anything like it to this day. Anyway, I start to wipe and i end up running out of toilet paper. I leave the stall, pants pulled down, to grab a roll of paper towels because for some reason there wasn't any toilet paper in the cabinet. I have to finish wiping with the paper towel, flushing each paper towel in small bits so that it doesn't clog the toilet. After wiping I then proceeded to clean up the mess. The whole ordeal lasted 40 minutes, and I arrived at my class very late with everyone wondering where I was.
Story 2: Not sure how old I was. Around 10 or 11 I'd say. I was really sick with a stomach bug and had to throw up. I ran to the trash can and start hurling. I pushed too hard, and felt my butt unleashing all hell in my shorts. I was only half way through puking, and had to continue while unsuccessfully trying to hold in my crap. Afterwards I took a shower and cleaned myself up. Standing in the shower for so long made me really nauseous again, and I ran to the trash can to start hurling again. The same exact thing happened. Literally moments after I had gotten out of the shower, I crap myself again. I shower again and yet again feel nauseous. This time I learned my lesson. I sat on the toilet while puking into the trash can and pooping out the other end. To this day I cant puke without sitting on a toilet. That moment traumatized me, and puking remains one of my least favorite things in the entire world.
Story 3: I was in first grade and it was during a class in the morning when I realized I had to poop. I raised my hand and asked to use the bathroom, but it was one of those teachers who tells you you have to wait until after class. So I sat there trying as hard as I could to hold it in. After 5 minutes I raise my hand and ask again because I can't stand It anymore. I tell her its an emergency. I waddled to the bathroom trying to hold it in, and mere feet away from the toilet it slipped. I crapped my pants, and it was everywhere in my underwear. I cleaned myself up as best I could, wiping my underwear until they were dry,, but the underwear had absorbed a bunch of it and there was no hiding the smell. I stuffed my underwear and butt with toilet paper and went back to class. I had to spend the rest of the day with crap in my butt. I did my best to stay away from everybody. Apparently my teacher smelled me and told my mom, who was also a teacher. After school my mom asked me if I had crapped my pants, and told me to be honest. I told her no. Later I admitted it to her, but I think she already knew anyway.
I was at a party once where it was kind of one of those make or break moments for one's social life. All the cute girls from school were there and it was go time. I find my way up to the bathroom and have a quick pee. I flush it afterward and it clogs somehow. I'm not even joking, all I did was pee.
So the water starts getting higher and higher to the point that it's creeping over the top of the bowl and into the floor. I'm in a sheer panic because I didn't want to be "Took a shit and clogged the toilet" guy for the rest of highschool and at the reunion.
So through my panic, I'm trying to figure out what happened, then I start to think exit strategy. Thinking if I could actually pull off "All I did was pee, I Swear!" to the next person coming in. Thankfully, when I opened the door, there was nobody there, so I just bailed back down to the party below.
Apparently, the next person to try to use the bathroom found it that way and was the "Hot girl" in school and one of the friends of the guy who lived there caught her before she had a chance to close the door and came down like "Yo, Jessica Smith's up there clogging your toilet, bro!" I of course throw out "That's fucked up, man!" and faded back into the crowd. While she of course had a rough night, though being "that girl" in school, everyone except me pretty much forgot it by the time school on Monday rolled around. Pretty sure my own involvement is what cemented it there in my memory.
I just had the biggest and hardest sh*t in my life. Literally tried pushing but NOTHING was making progress. I kept on pushing and somehow the hardest, longest, and thickest sh*t came out two in a row. Idk if it's just my cold but now my throat muscles and my leg muscles are shaking in their boots. My a**hole was bleeding a bit, I legit thought I had my period. Constipation at its finest, been trying laxatives but nothing. I came right here just to not feel left out, I was so proud after that came out of my weak body.
- echo -
Marry me.
I once busted the ceramic toilet while doing the business
I can think of several.
My mom had an extensive list of food allergies. She'd often need to use public restrooms in an emergency manner. We were out at some community concert, and this situation came up. I was super young, so she forced me to join her. I finished early, and my mom took another 20+ minutes in the handicap stall. (The only one available at the time.) Some crazy woman with a walker came in, peeked between the door and divider, and started ranting about my mom not being handicapped, and how she needed to vacate or get arrested for using the "handicap only" stall. This insane woman seemed to think bathroom stalls were like parking spaces, and you needed to have a visible, obvious, proven disability to use them, or go to jail???
Well, what my mom did in there, made people far from that restroom cry and gag. My mom clogged the toilet, which totally overflowed. She came limping out of the stall, and put on this whole act that she was also significantly mentally challenged, just to deal with the crazy woman. The woman didn't buy it, but pushed past my mom and started to use the facilities. She didn't seem to notice the brown pond surrounding the toilet, and fountain creating it. We ducked the heck out of there as fast as we could. We still had to go get my dad and brother however.
As we were just getting into the car my dad had pulled around, we heard that all too familiar screech. The crazy woman was screaming "That's the woman who illegally used the handicap stall, then s**t all over it! SOMEONE ARREST HER NOW!" 🤣😂🤣 My mom immediately went back into her act. She told me never to do that, once we were in the car. But we laughed about it for years. We never attended one of those particular concerts again. 🤣😂🤣
Stopped at some random Mexican restaurant, in the deep South, in the 1970s. (1976 I believe, I remember there being a LOT of Bicentennial decorations and souvenirs for sale.) The food was too much for my mom and I to handle, and we were road tripping back to Minnesota, as a family. So we used their "bathroom", which turned out to be an outhouse. There was one for men, and another for women. When you opened the sorry excuse for a door, there was a giant hole, with a long 2x4 balanced across it. I had used outhouses many times before. We had a "4-seater" at our family cabin. But this was nothing like I'd ever experienced, before or since. Not only was I terrified I'd fall in, there was no light, except through the gaping cracks between the rotten boards of the door. Thank God it was afternoon, in full daylight. I was a skinny toddler, so my mom found a "clear" spot to balance me on this board. But, if you read the above story, my mom wasn't so lucky. Not only couldn't she find a spot that wasn't covered in 💩, but she was morbidly obese, and just as she was finishing, using one of the freaking corn cobs they offered in lieu of toilet paper, the damn board broke, and she nearly plummeted into the pile of rotting death below. The stench was beyond words. My mom barely grabbed something (I was too young to remember what) which saved her falling all the way in.
Needless to say, my dad was forced to rent a motel room, so everyone could bathe/shower, and had to scrub out the car. I remember, that car was a white Pontiac, with white interior. We'd never used seat covers before then, but we did starting with that trip home. 🤣😂🤣
There's actually more. But I try to keep my posts as least disgusting as possible. The horror of that one event still gives me nightmares.
This was nowhere near the worst, but it wasn't pleasant either. When I was in the final month of pregnancy with my youngest son, he shifted into position, getting ready to be born. For somewhere between 3-4 weeks, I couldn't pee without it spraying out from under the toilet seat. (imagine how a hose sprays when you block it with your thumb) I didn't have much money, and only had 2 pair of maternity shorts. (July, with record breaking heat, and a water ban in place) Every single time I had to go, I'd have to wash a pair of shorts, and several towels, after scrubbing the floor, and taking a shower. Partially due to hormones, and obvious embarrassment, I would bawl my eyes out every time I felt the urge to go. And being that pregnant, it was often. I can laugh now, but still remember the insane shock and embarrassment.
3:00 this is why you take multiple flushes when taking a big dump
I notice the katakana! What’s your name in the native language?
The old toilet at my house used to flush really poorly, and in order to prevent an overflow, I would poop, flush, then wipe and flush again. That toilet has since been replaced by a better one, but even so, I’ll never fully trust it, and continue with my routine for safety’s sake.
Somewhat different than most of the stories...
A business was closing, and I was helping get everything out. Including a toilet. When I lifted it to throw it in the dumpster (those things are HEAVY!), it broke on the side of the dumpster, and a sharp edge sliced my arm. So yeah, I got beaten up by a commode.
LMAO there was this one time I was at this Mexican restaurant and went to the only restroom in that restaurant to pee. I made sure to lock the door. As soon as I sit down this woman pounded on the door and screamed, " HELLO? IS THERE ANYONE IN THERE?" And I respond, "Occupied!" Literally a few seconds later, she screams again, "IS THERE ANYONE IN THERE!" So I scream back again, "YES THERE IS SOMEONE IN HERE!" And then a few seconds later, as I was finishing up, she breaks the locked door open and looks at me, then says calmly and surprised, "oh, I didn't realize there was someone in here!"
Not me but my father. He worked in public works in sewage deapartment. Grease has clogged an Asian restaurants sewage line and was almost totally clogged. His boss told him to flush copious amounts of an acid based chemical down each toilet and there were six total. My father told him it was too much and the gasses would build, blowing a pipe. "Do it anyway!" So he did. After about thirty minutes there was an explosion. Every toilet in the place exploded from the floor including some sinks and floor drains. Everywhere there was food stuff, grease and well.....you know. The restaurant was closed for several weeks for cleanup. I don't think they ever totally recovered.
This one time I was on a boat, deep sea fishing with my friends. One particular friend is named Leo. We were an hour away from the shore, and the waves were 15 to 20 ft high. The boat was going up and down constantly. Evryone on board was sea sick and were in the room together sleeping the sea sickness off. However the boat had restrooms that did not flush and had no lock. But man, Leo was done for. I remember seeing Leo stand up and I was like "why you standing up on a boat?" Leo made sone funny faces, sucking in his face and bloating his face, and was shaking. I see him trying to walk then hear him say "oh gaw-" and Leo pukes all over the floor and does it non-stop for about 2 min. His puking was pretty bad, as he was shaking his head violently. However his puke rolled over the floors and everyone, who was sleeping on the floor, were soaked in puke. I went to the restroom to avoid the smell only to find the restroom soaked. The walls were soaked with water, toilet paper was wet, and a horrible stench arose from the restroom. I immediately knew that since the boat was rocking a lot that maneuver from the toilet was splashing out. I walked away into the room, and Leo passes by me heading towards the restroom. After 5 minutes or so, Leo comes back and his shorts are halfway soaked. The stench from the restroom comes into the main room, and Leo complains and says "dude someone smells bad here". After we get off the boat, Leo says "dude I think someone is following me and they smell really bad"
On two different occasions, with two different friends, I happened to take a massive poop in their bathrooms, clogging the toilets, just as my mother arrived to pick me up. Both times I was unable to unclog it and was forced to tell my friends and their parents and leave it for them to unclog. It was the worst.
Another time, at one of the friends houses mentioned above, I clogged the toilet and didn't want them to know (again), so I took a plastic grocery bag and put it in the bag, then tossed it in the garbage outside. Got away with that one.
At the other friends house mentioned in the first story, I accidentally peed myself from laughing too hard. We were having a sleep over with several girls that I didn't know. They all realized and made fun of me.
Another time while at work (I work at Walmart), I clogged the toilet but didn't realize it at first, and when I flushed, the little button you push to flush got stuck and wouldn't release, and since the water wouldn't go down, the toilet quickly began to fill. So, I'm frantically smacking to button to try and un-jam it, while poopy water starts flooding the floor. I eventually gave up and told a manager that I found it like that. 😭
I don't think they believed me.
So keep in mind I was really young, and I was at that age where I couldn’t go into the train bathroom myself because I didn’t know how to lock the train doors apparently???
Anyways so me and my mum go to the bathroom, and as she is doing the bathroom I lean back...on the buttons.
All of a sudden the door to the bathroom is sliding open very slowly, but we couldn’t get it to stop. So my mum is sitting on the toilet while the door is opening really slow and this man on the other side is just standing there, speechless. The worst part was tho once the door had opened to close it, it took another like 7 seconds to do so.
So ye, it’s why I HATE going on train bathrooms now.
My best was at a power plant at ~9000 feet. I don’t know what clues me in, but after I finished I used my foot to push the lever as I stood as far away as I could. Good thing, as it had a good amount of pressure. Likely set up for sea level, so a lot lower air pressure. Disappointed the operators that I didn’t get a turd bath.
my worst experiences with toilets were always in the countryside, i know four people who live in the countryside and have stayed with some other distant relatives in the countryside and their toilets are always disgusting.filled with cobwebs, has a bunch of grime around it and in many cases is in plain view of other houses.two of these people i know crap, pee and shower with their curtains open, indirectly facing other houses where people walk by sometimes, all the others have that uncomfortablely wide gap at the top and bottom and or holes in the door and walls and are in outside shacks. also the houses in these rural areas always have this echoy sound enhancing no privacy wall quality because they are either like shacks or super old and neglected.
Going off topic but i dont know why all these people have a lower standard of hygene, they seem do things naturally meaning that they dont properly clean dishes after they use them so they have this weird sticky dust on them and the houses are full of dead insects.one woman i know puts moss in her sandals to stop blisters and when she goes to the beach she doesnt wear her swimming costume under her clothes...she gets naked in front of random people (in a more secluded ish rocky area) and then changes into her swimsuit, she said people wont mind because she is thin,i forgot to mention but she has a massive ego.wow i didnt know how angry i was at all these people until i started writing this.Also im only refering to the people i have met not all people from country side, i dont know how they live and im not judging anyone other than people i have stayed with.
Yeah, that’s odd stuff. What country, to be sure?
I’m a “non-traditional” student returning to college in their 30s with a weird living situation so I dorm in a single in a building of basically people who I could’ve birthed. The girls on my floor leave so much shit, puke, and blood smeared on the toilets it befuddles me. I’ve been in hospitals for depression and rehab and haven’t seen this level of savagery. We also have international students who aren’t familiar with western toilets but rather squat toilets and they are often the culprits for the shit on the seat and throwing shitty and pissy paper on floor and not flushing it and no one will say or do anything because they don’t want to be “insensitive.” It’s awkward.
I knew a tattoo artist who lived in a bus. While hanging out one day, curious, I asked about his bathroom facilities. He casually pointed to a hole in the floor. So yeah...if you see the Tat Bus leave a parking lot, watch your step! You’ve been warned...
Oh , lordy , this brings back a memory. I was about 14 , and was at summer camp (it was my 3rd year there , and I'd never had an issue with the toilets there). So one day , after lunch , I return to the cabin , and realize I realize I really needed to poop. So I went , but one . . tiny . . issue. Bit of backstory about the camp toilets in the cabins real quick that's relevant. You can't flush too much toilet paper down them , or they clog. My dumb self , however , had indeed put too much toilet paper in this cabin toilet. And uh - clogged it. One of the camp counselors , bless this poor lady's heart , had to unclog it. *For clarification , I never told anyone at the camp it was me who clogged that toilet , and returned this year with no issues.*
This is got perfectly recommended to me at the right time I clogged a toilet today the first time in my life
Congratulations 💩
Probably because of Google ads, especially if you Googled anything about clogging a toilet
9:53 the same thing happened to me back in 2019, I woke up on a Wednesday night (I went to bed around 8 back then) throwing up!!! I ran to the bathroom and then had diarrhea at the SAME TIME (I had told my mom earlier that evening I wasn't feeling good but no one believed me) so I had to take a very long shower and let all my vomit and diarrhea get out through the drain. It was not painful though, but it's not fun when you have either (especially diarrhea cause it's impossible to wipe it off).
i was on an airplane taking a dump when the plane decides to take a sharp turn and i slide right off, still peeing and everything. good times
Imagine if you were standing
Something about these stories makes me snort. Maybe it’s the hilarious way of wording things, like “unfortunate porcelain throne” and “releasing hell on the toilet”
That moment when you use the toilet, but forget the lid is closed O.o 💩
these comments are killing me lol
... did the guy at 9:09 poop on the floor? If he did he deserved that because that was a dumb idea 🤦🏾♀️
Yeah, such a dumb risk to avoid embarrassment for something completely normal
The worst? Niagara Falls shooting out of your now raw, throbbing, and bloody butthole, round five. I felt fine. No nausea. Still got dragged to the hospital. That poor, poor nurse. Round six struck, and my muscles were too tired to respond. That poor nurse. I really did try to clench. My muscles were just too tired.
This led to a diagnosis of a virus laying waste to my intestine, a loss of several feet of intestine and a quarter of my colon, and multiple poop transfusions to encourage what intestine was left to grow.
That poor, poor nurse.
I once walked into a family bathroom in the Fort Lauderdale airport on a layover (hated the airport). All the public restrooms were full. but what made things worse was the huge pile of diarrhea sitting on the floor in front of the toilet. I could remember it was like grayish brown and light colored. I decided to hold it in.
The fourth story is why I have always made sure I have the bathroom trash can right in front of me when I'm on the toilet sick. I don't care how bad I have to go I will grab something to puke in first because most likely I will start throwing up too. I have celiac disease, and I also constantly get stomach bugs from my child who's in school so I've deal with this a lot lol.
Worst/best experance is when i was constipated and had a horrible tummy ache. I finally go to the bathroom and i shat so much in the school bathroom it filled half the bowl. Like....there wasnt even any water showing. It made the whole room stink and because we dont have bathroom doors (did on the stalls tho), just entry ways, the hall stank and kids vocally wondered why. The silver lining? I felt sooooooo much better.
Once I got the stomach bug severely and had everything coming out of both ends. While in the bathroom for the millionth time, I had just finished pooping then needed to throw up. As I'm throwing up, I felt the need to fart. I should have known better. I though it was going to be a tiny air bubble, but instead I crapped myself while still throwing up. I will never ever trust a fart in a situation like that again.
Mines a sad toilet story.
I was just new to the city I'm living in and we didn't realize our house was in a bad area and that it was a shit shack. this was the first thing that happened that made us realize how shitty it was. I was home alone and the toilet was being funny. I didn't realize that it was overflowing. I went downstairs into my bedroom and my room was flooded and half my stuff was soaked in pee water. I had no way pf contacting anyone so I gathered up what I could while having a panic attack. when my mom got home it took her 30 minutes to find the shut off because we had to open up the ceiling, go past the pipes, and then the shutoff was in the wall.
now I get panic attacks any time a toilet overflows.
No worse feeling than when you feel a storm brewing in your bowels and you know you’re about to commit some horrible atrocities to the nearest toilet
Worst experience is when I have to go to the bathroom in my then called local Food Pyramid. I walk in, not paying attention and do all the necessities to sit and let the dragon out. I didn't notice that someone had come here before me and very clearly missed the bowel with an astounding 5 inches so that the "Hershey" pieces touched my jewels
Exploding toilets make for the best stories
1) I was on the toilet and this kid came in tried pushing the door. He went and pushed the other door (OCCUPIED), and then proceeded to kick both doors. I then release a porcelain-splitting fart and that same kid just decided to slide under the door and laugh.
2) Came in the school toilet, kid standing there, door wide open, butt arse naked, peeing on the wall.
3) 4 times someone smeared their arse apples all over the wall.
Alright, I've got a story this time.
So I used to not drink enough water which meant that I wouldn't poop regularly. I would go days before the urge finally came. I lived like this like it was normal, until I started getting gut wrenching pain, and I knew I needed to change.
Cool, right? Well this passed summer I went on a trip, and because I'm quite picky about the water I drink, and I didn't want to bother anybody to buy it for me, I reverted back to a state of drinking nothing but coffee and soda. This finally caught up with me at one night at about 2 am. I had decided that it was time to go to bed finally, but couldn't because I was in so much pain. Initially I thought it was my period since it had just arrived, but my cycle has never hit me that hard. Eventually I figure it out and rush to the bathroom to poop, and I'm sitting there, hunched over and crying as I try desperately to get everything out of me so I can make the pain go away. A while goes by. Nothing more comes out, but I'm still in pain. A draw up a hot bath to see if that helps. I plop myself in and no more than a second goes by before I have to hop back onto the toilet for round two, all the while in pain, all the while thinking I'm going to throw up from it. It was 4 am before I finally felt enough relief to go to bed.
The moral of the story is to stay hydrated, kids.
I better not be the only one sitting on the toilet watching this video…
Throwing up and crapping at the same time is why you have a plastic trash can in the bathroom next to the toilet always. Also always carry kleenex with you. Purse kleenex has saved my butt countless times.
It shot water into my butt.
consider yourself lucky, I got it hit in my face... good times...
@@ivanrodionov9724 Hope you weren't on the bidet.
@@christelheadington1136 what do you mean by that? is that like a call for blood implying the bidet is more harmless? lmao!
@@ivanrodionov9724 -Actually that was meant for OP, sorry.
Everywhere
Sitting down with out a light & discovering the seat is up. My dad who constantly leaves it up forgot he left it up & fell in, karma is a B. I also hate it when robotic toilets flush when your using it. I wonder if they got hidden cameras in them looking at our butts.
it's an infrared sensor, sucks when you're shifting to adjust your butt and it just goes off because it thinks you stood up
CPacker 1183 I hate when those toilets do that too. Often I still want to wipe the seat after I’m done with a wet wipe so that the next person is not grossed out and now since it already flushed the toilet paper are used to wipe is still going to be there.
Poop stories are always the funniest. This guy 5:00 nearly shit himself to death
Soooo, and here are my stories:
In primary school, I went to school one day feeling pretty normal. But during 1st or 2nd lesson, I suddenly felt that I had to go to the toilet immediately because I had to crap. The teacher let me go and I ran down the stairs as fast as I could. But before I reached the toilet, I crapped in my pants… luckily I was able to clean them with toilet paper and I didn’t stink after that. But during 3rd or 4th lesson, I had to go to the toilet again and I crapped in my pants for the second time that day… I‘m glad that I had only 4 or 5 lessons that day.
Also, when the entire grade went on a trip for some days in 5th grade, the restrooms at the place we stayed at were disgusting (actually many things were disgusting or creepy). I avoided going to the toilet because they were stinky, unhygienic and creepy and sometimes there was no toilet paper. But I still couldn‘t avoid going there at least 1 - 2 times a day. And for some unknown reason, there was always crap on the toilet cabin walls… smeared over them with pieces of crap in there… I didn’t like that trip. Noone liked it…
When I was in high school I was on the marching band. Every year we would have a band trip where we'd go somewhere out of state and do some performances as well as just tour wherever we were. My junior year we went to Chicago and I got to see the Blue Man Group. About halfway into the trip almost everybody got sick to some extent. My brother and I got it the worst. We were travelling around on a bus the school was paying for with big seats, a tv and a bathroom in the back. I hate using any bathroom with other people around so I avoided ever having to use it until one fateful night. We were driving through the night and around 3 am I started to get really bad. I felt a hot chocolate geyser brewing in my stomach but was determined to wait for the next truck stop and was breaking out in a cold sweat. Somehow I managed to fall asleep. I woke up around an hour later and it was too late, I got up and high tailed it to the back of the bus for the bathroom. Once I got there I realized my mistake. This would not just be diarrhea. I immediately dropped to my knees thinking a could clench the shit in long enough and promptly (loudly and violently) shit my pants while heaving into the toilet. At just that moment one of the chaperones decided they need the restroom and without knocking start pushing the door open. I push back and force it closed 3 times unable to speak, still reeling from my newfound predicament. She forces her way in to see a scene she may never forget. All they had for me to clean up with was paper towels and I was doing all this in almost pitch darkness. They had to stop the bus so I could get new clothes from my bag from underneath the bus in storage. Wound up just sleeping face down in the middle of the bus floor on top of my hoodie. By that time no fucks were given. When I woke up in the morning I realized I still had shit smeared on the back of my right leg. Anyone who had been awake at that point who'd dared to glance down the aisle most definitely noticed. Worst toilet experience of my life. 1/10 wouldnt ride again
Worst experience with a toilet? Finding out that mine (As well as everyone else's) toilets are mildly radioactive.
It's not just toilets! Some other things you might be surprised to hear about:
-granite countertops (uranium ore)
-bananas (potassium-40)
-cigarette smoke (polonium-210)
-Pepto-Bismol (bismuth-209; don't worry it has a half-life longer than the age of the universe :D)
-you yourself!
The last one is because all plants and animals get their carbon from atmospheric carbon dioxide, and some of it is carbon-14.
The poor 1st grader left alone long enough to crap himself, then long enough to get hives 😭
There was a toilet in a forest that tried to kill me, that was fun
At Girl Scout camp we called them BIFFYs [Bathroom In Forest For You] which was basically just a pot toilet with a boat-style flushing system, also running drinkable cold water in a sink. No funny/notable stories about the BIFFYs themselves but a fellow camper approached me while we were at the beach and grabbed my arm and dragged me to the bathroom exclaiming that she couldn't use the BIFFYs because they were gross and she had been holding it for days since we had arrived at camp and we used the buddy-system so she chose me as her buddy and I needed to come with her as she was about to explode... I worried about her as I was only at camp for one week-long session but she was there for two in a row.
The chemical toilet story was awesome… . So funny!
No matter how old I get, poop will always be funny lmao
Worst moment with a toilet was when I was sleeping over at a new boyfriend's house (hadn't made it Facebook-official yet and was still worried he wouldn't like me). I woke up in the middle of the night with diarrhea, which I'm used to as I am sensitive to certain fats and oils so I attempted to approach the problem without leaving any trace or clue as to my sensitive bowel. When I finished and had adequately cleaned myself I went to flush only to find it now clogged. I didn't fret as I have a good amount of experience using a plunger to fix problems such as these, I just needed to find the plunger which was not in that bathroom at the time. So I wander to the upstairs bathroom to look for a plunger and they have one but... it's what I would later learn was a plunger intended for sinks, but I thought it was fucking just-like-dad toy plunger and simultaneously laughed and wept quietly as I took the Noisy-Cricket-esque plunger down to my secret shame in the downstairs bathroom. I-SHIT-YOU-NOT the handle on the plunger was 8 inches long and the rubber part was as big as the drain at the bottom. You literally couldn't use the tool without immersing your hand in the unspeakable. It was very reminiscent of a terrible cringe comedy/romantic sitcom. Eventually I admitted defeat and left the toilet clogged but lid closed and something on top to call attention to it as being not well... I hastily excused myself in the morning, mentioning something to the guy about problems plunging the toilet overnight as I rush out the door.
I was relieved when he called me later that day to exclaim that the only plunger in the house was comically/laughably small and that no wonder I had a rough night... we ended up staying together for 3 or so years after that but it was certainly an interesting story...
I was a big fan of those Worst Case Scenario books when I was younger and have since read their article about clog-clearing alternatives when no plunger is available so hopefully this incident will not repeat itself
“Tickets please!” Gets me every time lmfao
This one was rather hilarious. Anyway we were on vacation in Florida and we were coming back home. Me and my brother both had to crap. We kept holding it for what feels like an hour. Eventually it started to hurt me. When we got back to my grandparents we both rushed inside and when I sat down on that toilet I gave birth to a freaking monster. It was one giant solid turd just about as thick as my wrist. I was so surprised I actually took a photo of it. I still have that photo and still proud of that beast. I'm amazed it didn't clog the toilet. My dad probably would have went nuclear from his oldest son clogging his parents toilet lol.
This one was also hilarious. I once had explosive diarrhea at my dad's and unknowingly the pressure washer that was my butt splatted the bottom of the rim (there is a name for it IK) the smell afterwards was insanity. I never knew my crap could smell so bad. I remember not long after my dad had to come upstairs for something and he immediately gets hit by the smell and actually gets pissed off. I am trying not to laugh especially when he said it smelled like a garbage truck had dumped upstairs which was literally the perfect description for the smell... you know the one. I still love reliving that moment. My dad told me later about the rim splatter hence the smell never seemed to leave.
Not the toilet but my grandparents bathroom. So the floor was week I was getting stuff ready for a bath. Cleaned the tub out and go to get some pjs. And I fell through the floor. My mom who has a heart conditions witness it and about had a heart attack. So I ended with a concussion an injured leg and arm and bruised rib. Yet my grandmother blamed me for the floor
Soap or laundry detergent down the toilet will help unclog it without having to use a plunger. It may take a couple hours for the effect to happened but you won't have to plunge
Asking someone to hurry in the bathroom is not effective at all.
7:54 bro got attack by the 4 horsemen of bodily functions
I went on this youth group thing to the Isle of Wight and the food was awful, everyone had minor food poisoning symptoms, severe stomach cramps, nausea, constipation. I resorted to only eating chocolate. I was in the girls building, one bathroom (three toilet cubicles) for 32 people (we had another bathroom but it flooded) it was the final day of five and I was so happy to leave, got up earlier than most but the bathroom was still pretty busy.
I walked into a cubicle to pee in the morning and I see a shit. Now a shit in a toilet is gross, but not abnormal. But this was no ordinary shit. It was the biggest shit I’ve seen in my life, it was the size and girth of a pint glass and it was so long it leaned out of the toilet like a deformed caterpillar on steroids. Turned around and walked out of the cubicle, didn’t speak of it to anyone in the bathroom, no longer needed to piss.
I later found out that the boys building had, had a similar problem, but when they had a giant shit clog the toilet, they just kept shitting on it.
"Deformed caterpillar on steroids" oh my God I'm dying 🤣🤣🤣
You just made my day 😂💩🐛
Geo: Gamer, Artist, Vlogger
We tried to tell the people in charge and they just got angry that we were comparing a shit to a pint glass. They thought the detail wasn’t necessary but it was, otherwise it was impossible to imagine the sheer size of it.
a tiny bit of back story. my brother is in cadets and he gets MREs quite a lot from FTXs.
so basically I ate this spice pound cake one (really delicious and didn't seem like anything was wrong with it) and then got really sick. i think it might have been off. maybe they didn't have the right proportions of ingredients in the batch or maybe it had a crack in the bag it was in. but I felt like I needed to puke so I bow down to the porcelain god and puke... but also a bunch of shit decides to go out the other end. this happened 4 times before I sat on the toilet and puked in a bowl. it also happened 3 times in my bed. all I ate for 2 days was 2 ice cubes. now I can't even smell anything that is spice (like pumpkin pie, spice pound cake, and even apple cider) without gaging. even thinking about it is making me cringe.
_"tickets please"_
Many years ago, I was in Trinidad, W.I. Our group was on a nature tour. There were many small roadside bars/gas stations. One day, I had to pee, really bad. If we had been in the rainforest, no problem, duck behind some shrubbery. Alas, no decent shrubs around, so I'll have to use the gas station bathroom. Some of the folks there were trying to discourage me, but I REALLY needed to go. I opened the door, and I'll never forget the sight that greeted me. It looked like someone had lobbed in a hand grenade. What was left of the toilet was the tank, the bowl, and part of the rim. No seat. The room didn't look much better. So I gingerly perched of the intact bit of rim and did my business. There was an advantage to being indoors: no spiky plants to assail one's nether regions, and no visible snakes or spiders. 😁
Was peeing on a plane directly after they announced there was turblance because I was waiting in line and I was the last one
once upon a time, it got so flipping cold that the toilet in my bathroom actually cracked and was flowing like a dang waterfall all over the floor and into the carpet of the hallway, and even a little bit into my bedroom. have you ever walked on completely drenched carpet with bare feet? IT AIN'T FUN. we had to take it out and had a hole in there for at least 3 weeks. and i had to haul my dumb ass to the spare bathroom each time i had to go...
Better than having socks on.
I currently work at a day program assisting brain injured adults with daily routine. At some point the toilet in the bigger bathroom mysteriously overflowed. There was an unbelievable amount of water everywhere. Nobody knew how long it had been since it was last used by either client. All I did was turn on the lights when I was just about to change the diaper of one of my clients and noticed the water glistening under the light. My director painstakingly mopped the whole mess while my co-workers had to temporarily borrow the floor mats to change the other client diapers.
Vomiting and diarrhea at the same time. I had a really bad stomach bug, and as I ran to the bathroom, I had to decide which end to stick into the toilet. I panicked and stuck my head in first, and ended up with a diarrhea fountain spraying all over the wall.
Whenever I was six, I sprinted into the bathroom, tripped over the stepstool in front of the sink, and hit my face on the toilet seat. I had to go to the emergency room and I still have a scar today👍🏻
Lol
Oof
After dr. appointment afew years ago, I had to potty before leaving. A women goes into the other stall and proceeds to fart very long and loud..
I started laughing so hard I didn't want to leave my stall for fear she would see me..(ok so I'm a chicken shit..) as I was still laughing!
When it comes to clogging toilets, no one is better at it than my little sister.
The amount of times she’s clogged a toilet is in the double digits.
This is mainly because she poops every other day, sometimes longer.
These terms are great "the beast, the Throne, Turd Mud, poop steel" oh man
This was fantastic. I can’t remember any recent bad toilet experiences. My boyfriend had one I was witness to but I’ll spare him. I haven’t let him live it down though.
dude i haven't laughed this hard in freaking months why are poop moments so freaking funny
I'm halfway through and already have a headache from laughing too hard.
Please do more of these PLEASE!
It’s 4am and I can’t laugh, so I’m sitting here sounding like a dying dolphin
7:55 - that might be one of the funniest/most amazing things I've ever read/heard...ACTUALLY lmao
A first grader alone in a classroom? When I was 18 and a senior in HS, I wasn’t allowed to he alone in a classroom. I was however allowed to “sign myself out” as long as I cleared it with the teacher and Secretary.
i sail a lot and we have a underwater toilet, i did my byuisnis and wanted to flush, but ofcourse me being me forgot to open the line that actually sends it to the outside of the hull. im pumping to build up pressure when instead of pushing it outside it is trown into the air right in my face.......lets say i was glad i could jump overboard
The worst is clogging it in a public place/ family gathering
I am known as Master Toilet Clogger in my boy scout troop because I clogged two different toilets and made the plunger not work on them. I joked about returning at midnight to destroy the rest of the toilets in a sick serial toilet killer way.
I have so many restroom horror stories that I just stopped using using public restrooms altogether