I don't normally comment on youtube videos, but I wanted to say thanks for this one. You explained things so clearly and in a way that's very relatable. I know not everyone's experiences of autism and/or mental health are exactly the same, but I felt I learnt a lot from listening to this. Thank you.
Thank you Martin. Yes, there is a well worn 'joke' amongst the autistic 'community' that is: 'if you have met one person with autism, you have met one person with autism'. I think it is a quote from Stephen Shore (not the famous photographer, but an American autistic professor of special education, at the Adelphi University). We are all unalike, as well as alike. As you say, the same applies to mental health - the human brain is a complex beast! Thanks so much for the comment; it is greatly appreciated. Take care, Paul
Thanks Paul. I worked as a mental health professioal in the NHS for 25 years and have had a couple of bouts of anxiety myself. In my experience of working with my clients one of the issues that came up frequently was the problem of 'small talk'. None of them found it at all enjoyable for various reasons. One of those reasons was the one you described in your case of the 3 men who approached you in series asking about your equipment namely and to put put it bluntly, although well meaning, was the inability to know when to stop. The other thing I to mention and something I really enjoy about your videos is the peaceful and relaxed feel you create, whilst still providing good information and excellent stills images and footage. I should add that the music you choose for your vids is so good . . . you seem to get it just right and always conguent with the subject. Please keep keep it up in your way . . . Thank you
Thank you! That's a lovely comment. Yes, you have picked on something, which although I have not spoken about before, is that I deliberately slow my videos down to make them more relaxing. I find, often, that with a lot of videos on TH-cam, they are too fast paced for me, and bring out a nausea as an unwanted side effect, due to the speed at which they have been edited, and the very fast, ultra tempo, music. I do try to edit the video and photos around the music, and not the other way around (i.e. the music isn't put on after, but first, like a base coat of paint). I thought that was how you were supposed to do it, but apparently many others don't! I can rewatch some of my videos sometimes to help calm me down. I guess what I am trying to do is 'create' a world that is more calming to me, than the real one out there - I had not thought about it that way before! Thanks so much for a very interesting comment. Take care, Paul.
Hi Paul, you explained yourself really eloquently in your video, well done and I hope it helps you as well. I went back to have a look at the end of the video at Stourport and really couldn't see anything untoward that said I was thinking that it did look busy back in the park .... but that ice cream did look tempting!! I've read all of the comments so far and there are some great suggestions for being prepared for these situations. Thanks for all the hard work that you put into your videos we are all right behind you 100%. Have a great weekend.
Thank you so much David. Thanks for your kind comments. I have been blown away by the reaction to this video to be honest with you. It is taking me longer to reply, because each comment deserves a considered reply, and to acknowledge just how useful and/or connected others have found this video. As you say there has been some fantastic advice too. Thanks again for your kind words and support - it is very much appreciated. Take care, Paul.
I can totally relate to stuff you've said. I've not been diagnosed with autism but I'm starting to wonder more and more if I have it. I do struggle socially. When I make a video, like you, I have to be in the right head space. One small negative thing can completely throw me. Some days I'm just not in the mood to talk so my videos will just get music over them. I often find it hard to explain how I'm feeling too....
I am glad that you found my little video relatable. If you do feel like that you may be autistic, then it could be worth seeing your GP. I do need to warn you though that the waiting lists for a diagnosis are quite lengthy, unfortunately. You can see a psychologist privately, and/or you can also do autism self tests online, but you would need still need to get a professional to confirm this. Yes, the one small negative thing! It gets me every time! It can mean that, although I do put a lot of effort into my videos, they can sometimes be a little 'uneven' insofar as how chatty in places that I am, and how silent in other parts of the video. I think my audience is used to that now - hopefully! Thank you for a lovely comment, and I do hope you can get any additional help and understanding that you may need. Take care, Paul
Paul, this was so well articulated and interesting and also relatable to. Thank you for taking the time to make this and to explain everything so well. I can identify with a number of the difficulties you experience difficulties with like small talk etc. It’s fantastic that you are able to share your experiences here and in so doing help others and their family members who may be experiencing similar. Thanks for the mention too! It’s always a pleasure to collab with you.
Thank you Louise, and glad you found it relatable. That's a lovely comment. Glad you found it interesting. I do hope to make future videos on this topic occasionally on my channel. Thanks for supporting my channel and, likewise, I do enjoy doing collabs with you too. Take care, Paul.
Hi Paul, just to say well done for this explanation; I don’t think I’ve ever heard an explanation of this condition before, and such an articulate one. All of us could try our best to be an ally of those with lifelong health issues and be considerate and kinder. I will watch out for it in future and do my best. The robin must be a good totem. 🙂
All I can say, then, Paul, is that your Autism is a blessing in disguise, if it drives you to produce such wonderful videos, which do not betray any sign of your condition, nor does your presence in the videos give any hint to it, were we not privy to it. Thankyou for that insight. And keep producing these videos, long and short, big bite, short bite!
Thank you Michael! Glad you took something from this little video. I will try to keep producing them for as long, and when, I am able to do so. Thanks again, Paul.
Well mate I watched it all the way through! It was as informative as all of your other videos. Paul, please do not change your style and delivery, it is your uniqueness that makes your content so great. Regards Pete and Jayne
I found this interesting Paul. I like to visit my allotment early in the morning for two reasons. 1) it's so peaceful with just the birds and insects buzzing around and 2) there's rarely any other people there! As other growers start to show up around 9 or 10am I'm usually ready to return home, so I can say good morning and chat if I choose, or make my excuses and leave. I also have my mobile phone set on silent whilst enjoying the great outdoors. I generally like people, but not too many at a time. You explained your condition very well here, and I hope you continue enjoying/filming for your channel. Best regards! ☺
Thank you! Yes, early morning is a great time of day! Good for photography/videography too. One of the reasons I prefer filming and photographing with my camera, rather than the more popular option these days of using a mobile phone, is precisely because I can leave my phone at home, or switch it off, and be in the moment with the image taking. Phones are far too distracting to me as a YT Creator. Yes, I will certainly continue to film and photograph for as long as, and when I am, able to do so. Thanks again for your kind words. Take care, Paul.
Thanks for taking on a sensitive topic and discussing it openly. I'm always curious to hear other people's perspectives and better understand their life experience. I can see how being on the spectrum or being really introverted can be challenging when people are intrusively talking/questioning you at length. I'm so glad that your channel is helping you with a hobby you enjoy and also helping you to process your mental health concerns. Good for you!! All the best XX Dara
Thank you Dara! Yes, doing TH-cam enormously helps me to keep going. I really enjoy watching your channel too - sorry I don't get chance to watch or comment on every video though. As you know, researching, filming, editing and promotion all takes time. But, I really enjoy the process. Take care, Paul.
Hi Paul, Thank you so much for this video, as this subject affects our family so I understand where you are cumming from. I think people just focus on really extreme cases and dont realise there are different degrees of Autism , that affect people differently. Thank you again for talking about it and helping us understand it a bit more.
Thank you so much and thanks for your kind words. Glad you found the video useful. I will occasionally return to this topic from time to time. Take care, Paul 👍🙂
Thanks for sharing this. I have very similar experiences. I have eventually learned how to look very unapproachable and far fewer strangers attempt to engage with me these days. I have just started mentioning my autism at the start of all my videos to explain why my channel has a very particular presentation style which won’t be to everyone’s taste. I too have a series on Autism and other neurodivergent conditions. I enjoy your channel. I miss the West Country so I get to enjoy it vicariously through your videos
Thank you so much! That unapproachable look seems an interesting tactic. Thanks so much for watching and glad that the video struck a chord with you. Good to hear too that my Westcountry videos are of interest to you. Cheers, Paul.
Well Done, Paul Thanks for this explanation. Your video's are so well done, that I would never have picked up on it. As others have voiced in these comments, I am somewhat plagued by some of these things. Crowds always bother me and I easily understand why distractions rob you of sense of order. I am glad you felt well enough to voice this. I am glad you feel you are among friends! Take Care, Jim
Thank you for explaining how this affects you. I'm guessing that Autism affects different people in different ways. Your video's are great and you present them very well. Thanks.
Thank you so much Martyn. Yes, it is a complex condition and, as you say, it affects everyone differently. Glad you enjoy my videos. Take care, Paul 🙂👍
You undoubtedly give all your subscribers a lot of pleasure in watching your excellent and well informed videos, I hope you can take pleasure and confidence from that. You look to have far more confidence than me, there’s no chance I would ever put myself in front of a camera! All the best 👍👍
Thanks Mark! I am far more comfortable in front of a lens than in front of people in a social situation. Thanks so much for watching and commenting. Cheers, Paul.
Thank you Paul, this video is so enlightening. Our son is Autistic and he struggles with life at times. He is 35 years old and we are still learning as parents. I am particularly interested in your comment about "invading someone else's space" There are things that we do today that I now realize we should not be doing with regard to "invading someone's space" It's not easy believe you me. Many thanks and God bless.
Thank you Tony. Yes, as you have seen, I struggle everyday because the world is designed by and for NTs (neurotypicals - i.e. people that are not neurodiverse (dyslexic, dyspraxic, autistic, etc) but things, thankfully, are slowly changing. This is the third video I have made on this topic - I may return to it again in the future. Glad it helped a little. There are lots of autistic TH-camrs that make videos specifically about this topic which you may find useful like: @ConnorWardUK and @StephanieBethany which you also may find useful. Best Wishes to your family, Paul
I think you expressed yourself really well in this video. You do remarkably well to put yourself anywhere near places & situations that could be difficult for you. We are all different. Take care of yourself.
Thank you Faith! Thanks so much for watching and listening. I do try to have a defence mechanism to prevent full on melt downs by having an escape route, or turning down things that are likely to be super stressful for me (like the film shoot with the famous TH-camr, and loads and loads of strangers). Thanks again, Take care, Paul
Wonderful video- my 17 year old identified with your words. Thank you. I love your calm narration and knowledge especially the canals (Thames and Seven, Stroud) and the railway videos . Keep up the good work.
Thank you - glad your 17 year old could identify with it. It is a topic I will return to again at some point. Glad you are enjoying the videos. I am currently background planning the next Cotswold Canals Update video (part 16, would you believe!) - hoping to go into production in a couple of weeks, and post prod early June. Thanks so much, All the Best! Paul
Hi Paul, I truly enjoyed hearing your experiences with autism. Even though I learned about autism in university, it is still a bit tricky to understand how every person is a bit different. This helps to understand what others might be experiencing as well.
I understand where you are coming from, as I struggle with life situations also. Sometimes, I just can't cope, and nobody gets it. I just have to get through these situations somehow. Life's hard!
Dear Paul, I am not autistic but I am very sensitive althoughmany people see me as ' hard nosed'and somone who can help in times of trouble. Helping others causes me stress because I feel a huge responsibility that my help or advice might result in making their problem worse. I have learned from these negative feelings and try to use stragegies to counter them.The most essential thing is the old boy scout's motto of being prepared and analyse one's motives and goals.. Of course one cannot prepare for unexpected eventualities, but your filming has shown that one problem keeps reoccuring. So if you are prepared,like Cathy Dyer advises below, I think one big problem will go away. Those of a sensitive nature find it hard to rebuff people who just want to chat because they do not like to be impolite. Sometimes the lesser of two evils is to risk being thought of as impolite. In truth I suspect anyone who you rebuff might think that you are rude but they will soon forget it. Your greater goal pf making a film to please many should be uppermost. My motto is, "One cannot help others if one first does not take care of oneself." Sensitive me did notice the lack of filimg in Stourport and I did wonder why. Thanks for the explanation. I repeat what you end any comments that I may make to tour videos. "Take care".
Some great, considered, advice there John - thank you for that. Much appreciated. I will try to heed yours and Cathy's advice next time this situation arises. Yes, developing coping strategies to survive is a fundamental. One of the reasons of why I do TH-cam, and what, and crucially how and where, I film. Thanks again and take care! Paul
Hi Paul, I watched a lot of your video's and only just seen this 1. Thanks for explaining to us all, I don't really understand Autism that well but after you explained it makes alot of sense. you sound like a great bloke to talk to and lots of good stories about the local area etc but I'm kind of thinking I'd be a person which you probably would find draining with general chat as well I might try looking for signs more as never knew it effected people with Autism like this thank you for explaining.
Hello! Thank you for watching this video. It is quite a bit different from the others on the channel - although I have made an earlier one when I talk about autism too. The thing to bear in mind is that everyone who is autistic is different - no two of us have exactly the same problems and diffculties, and we all portray in a different way. However, there tend to be common strands. I find social situations very overwhelming - I can mask to 'appear' normal (like an actor on stage), but it is exhausting, and I can't keep masking for extended periods. I am very comfortable talking into the camera - I can always edit out the bits where I really word stumble or look awkward. I could never do a live stream, and I prefer to film in much quieter areas, not liking urban at all. Doing photography and videography and running this channel is the only thing I have really enjoyed in my life - because there are no external pressures, or other people involved (apart from occasional collabs with people I feel comfortable with) and I can go at my own pace (which tends to be very slowly!). Thanks again, Cheers, Paul
@westcountrywanderings many thanks for your reply Paul, you also mentioned you were diagnosed with Autism in 2004 sorry for my ignorance but I guess you had it all your life and not known about it? I guess it just can't get triggered when you were an adult? It's so interesting and thank you again for sharing you are a top man. 👍 cheers Ash
@ashjenkins7591 thank you, and, yes, it is something that you are born with and it stays with you. The easiest way I can explain it is wiring - neuro typicals (non autistic and non ADHD/dyspraxia people) are wired with one configuration in the brain, but we (neurodiverse) are wired in a completely different way. The world feels very alien to me, and it was largely designed by neurotypicals for neurotypicals. There is nothing anyone can do to change that, but it is about adopting a lifestyle that is less disruptive and less painful and harmful as is possible. One of the reasons I do TH-cam is because I can go at my own pace, and film in places that I feel comfortable and safe. Thanks again, Paul
@westcountrywanderings thanks for explaining Paul it's good to learn about these things for people who haven't got Autism to understand. I have only recently noticed your video and I will do lots of your walks. After seeing your video on Severn Valley Railway we are going this weekend. Many thanks 😊
Thank you for sharing this and for helping to raise awareness - this was very well explained and totally makes sense needing to be well to be able to articulate what it feels like to be when you're not feeling well.
Hi Paul. Thank you for this video and you explained it very well. Its good that you enjoy making your youtube videos and that you have the time and freedom to choose topics and locations and have fewer of the restrictions and challenges of past jobs. Regarding Stourport..... what could have been seen as people chatting and delaying your filming ...ended up being much more disruptive and upsetting for you. The people who talked to you probably enjoyed the chat and thought they were being sociable. I have a possible solution. The 3 in a row seemed to be the problem. Maybe have a few sentences ready for this scenario where there are people about. Eg Sorry I cannot chat while filming as i quickly lose my focus due to autism. They should get the message and leave you in peace.
That's a good point Cathy! In hindsight, I probably should have passed them one of my business cards too and asked them to get in touch with me on here or Facebook if they had any questions. The only trouble, is I hate letting people down, and I am not very good at thinking laterally on my feet! I will try to do that, if that situation happens to arise again. Thanks so much for your support and kind comments. Take care, Paul
Hi Paul, a little late to this one, well only a year out! I don't know if I have Autism or whether its the Parkinson's, but I feel the same on so many of the things you mentioned. I don't do social occasions because I can't cope with small talk, and sometimes I feel I'm walking around a black pit on a crumbling path, other times I feel ok. Nice to get that off my chest. Thanks for making this film. Ron
Thank you Ron. Glad it struck a chord with you, but not glad that you have experienced depression yourself. It is a horror to experience, and you gave a good description of it there. Yes, I think I made this one, not just to highlight and talk about autism, but also mental health generally, and by doing what you enjoy (in my case and yours too, photography, walking & exploring outside) can help improve your mental health. Thank you for being so candid in your comment. Yes, social situations are a nightmare! I think that is a big area where a sizeable proportion of the public do not enjoy, but a lot are too afraid to admit it. There is, still, a social stigma in saying that one doesn't enjoy social events and experiences, and that people are just expected to enjoy it because others do. Thank you for an excellent, honest, open and heartfelt comment. Paul
Hi Paul. I somehow came across this and glad I did. This was a real eye opener. Never knew you had autism, but knowing ones closely who also have it, I understand (best I can) what you must be going through. You do amazing considering 👍
Thank you for sharing such a personal video. My grandson, now age almost 13 has autism. Your personal insites are very helpful. As grandparents we are very familiar, known quantities so to speak, so have a great relationship with our grandson. We are always very mindfull of the situations we may place him in when he spends time with us but also quite relaxed about it. Anything that raises awareness of peoples differences and that we are all different is a good thing to do. Thank you.
Thank you Simon. Glad you found this video helpful, particularly with giving insights into your grandson too. You sound like you are both wonderful grandparents, and are both mindful of your grandson's needs, and boundaries to reduce his anxieties. It is a topic that, although it is quite away from the normal main topics of my channel, I will return to again occasionally. Thanks so much for watching and commenting. Take care, Paul.
Hi Paul. i don't have autism but i suffer terribly with my Mental Health Mainly with anxiety and depression. i started doing TH-cam and have found that just walking now isn't Quite enough for me but since i have been filming ect i have got better. or at least i feel better after i have had the walk edited and uploaded. like you say everyone is different. anyway i would just like to thank you for sharing your experiences as with some of them i can relate to. so thank you as i realize that this kind of video takes a lot of guts and i am not sure i could have spoken so openly and Honestly. Best wishes Darren.👍👍
Thank you Darren - that is very kind of you. Yes, walking, photography and exploring helps my mental health enormously. Having now taken early retirement at the age of 60, doing Westcountry Wanderings has given me a real focus to work on. It has helped me a lot - the beauty of it is that you can go at your own pace. If you don't feel like doing pieces to camera that particular day you don't have to - you do voiceovers, or research, or editing. It is so flexible and you can do as much, or as little, as you want. I don't know if I spoke about this in this particular video, but I have found diet enormously important in looking after my mental health too. In particular, making sure I get enough of the Omega range (3, 6 & 9) through eating eggs (in moderation) and flaxseeds, as well as a range of nuts, like almonds. I have found the supplement 5-HTP (from healthfood stores) to be a non-prescription help for depression too. You need to follow the directions carefully though. I do mindfulness to help control my anxiety and I try not to take on too much each day. Hope this helps in some little way. Take care, Paul
@westcountrywanderings paul, that's amazing, thank you I will look more into this, I have a b12 deficiency that I can now have injections for which is helping with my energy levels but understand that my diet could be improved 😉
Thanks a lot Paul. All your videos are interesting and thought provoking but this one and your others on mental health really stand out. When there is so much negativity on the internet these days, your candid and thoughtful videos really make a difference and lead to greater understanding. Thanks again.
That's very kind of you to say so - thank you! Although this topic is not the main thrust of what my channel is about, I will occasionally return to this issue, as I realise that it affects many. Thanks again, Paul
@@westcountrywanderings Just to clarify, I love your more ‘regular’ videos as I spent my youth in the Glos area and really love all the memories your stuff reawakens with me. But I had a sibling with what was diagnosed as Asperger’s a few years ago. None of us had even heard of this all those years ago but I really wish we had access to the information which people like you are now sharing. Thanks again Paul.
@@Nigel_A Thank you! Yes, I was diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome too - although that term is no longer used - it is just autism now. Partially the reason is the term 'high functioning' is misleading as autistic capabilities aren't linear or uniform throughout a person's life (or, indeed, day sometimes) as I eluded to in the video. The other reason is that there is some evidence to say that Hans Asperger was a Nazi (he originally defined it), and had what he determined to be less able autistic children sent to the gas chambers in Nazi Occupied Poland and Austria. Horrid time of history I know. Thanks again, Paul.
@@westcountrywanderings Sorry if I offended using ‘Asperger’s’. I have lived in HK, China my whole adult life so we are not as PC nor as ‘informed’ as the UK - I had no idea about the Nazi background. It is a term my brother still uses as he knows I will understand. No offence meant. I feel my life is so much richer for everything he (and you) has shared about this. All the best.
@@Nigel_A No offence taken! A lot of medical personnel right across the world are not aware of this link either. I only became aware of it a couple of years ago.Thanks again, Take care, Paul.
Thank you for explaining your autism so well. My godson was diagnosed at an early age with autism. He appears to have ‘outgrown’ it but he could be masking it- he holds down a complex job- his brother seems to have lots of problems but is hopefully coping with them but I do worry about him. I think he is on the autistic spectrum but to my knowledge has never been diagnosed as such. Directly I heard the music I knew it was Esther Abrami! I was listening to her 10 short music pieces late last night. (Another TH-camr has made a’tribute’ to her as he is a great fan.) It was such a coincidence to hear her again this morning! Thanks. Ps I would post the link but have no idea how to do it.
Thank you Diana! Glad you found the video useful. Yes, you don't outgrow autism - you have it for life - but it is not an illness, and it doesn't get worse of itself. It is most likely that he is mimicking others and masking. Unfortunately, masking all the time isn't healthy, and comes with its own stresses. It is good to take the mask off. That's why I find social situations so stressful too, and need my own space after a social event/meeting, so I can be myself, and take the mask off. There are lots of people who have not been diagnosed, but struggle through life. A diagnosis does not take away the problems, and there is no help generally available, but it does help the person understand who they are, and why they are different from people who do not have autism. Esther Abrami! What a talent! Yes, she is more known for her violin work nowadays, but a true creative musical genius. She has several piano tracks in the TH-cam library which are free to use copyright free for video creators. She has her own channel on YT too. To share a video, you need to access TH-cam via a computer, laptop, tablet or mobile (rather than the Smart TV App). Underneath the video, near the description of it is a button that says 'share'. Click on it, then hit 'copy'. That will add the link to the video onto your device's clipboard. Then, go on to Twitter, or Facebook (you can't share on Instagram) or within an email/WhatsApp message, and click 'paste' inside the body of the text. Hope this helps! Thanks again Diana, Take care, Paul
Your descriptions strike many chords with me. Apart from one-to-one conversations, which are usually OK; unstructured, informal gatherings, leave me at a loss, where, like you, I absent myself, or if this is not possible, I am simply an onlooker, an outsider, with no voice, or 'existance'. On the other hand, where relations are more structured and formal, I am more able to cope - for example, lecturing - with notes = to a room of students, or speaking in public. Things are still fraught, but nothing like the ordeal of 'fraternizing' before or after formal gatherings, or at party's - which are completely off limits for me. The feelings of inadequacy, low self-esteem, and lack of confidence, can dramatically affect my mental state, which is a kind of roller-coaster, though thankfully, without extremes. All the same, the inability to cope with such key aspects of everyday life, can be very disabling. I am now retired, but the problems have not gone away. Paradoxically, the structured, more formal occasions, which were for me, a kind of 'therapy', are no longer available. Nonetheless, it is good to talk - albeit, impersnally inside the Web. .
I only glossed over some of the issues in this little video Malcolm, and one of the very many things that I struggle with is telephones. I really hate picking up the phone, and much prefer email and text as a primary means of communication. One of the reasons is because I can't think quickly how to reply in a face to face conversation, and I often think of several possible replies, but it takes me a while to work through the 'best' one. I can also edit before hitting 'send' - you can't do that in a vocal conversation! Yes, I much prefer one-on-one 'talk' too. I can no longer work because of my roller coaster depression (employers don't want to hear 'I can't come in at 8am, but I can make up for it by working through tomorrow night'), but, like you, I do miss the more formal conversations of a work environment. Although, 'work' for me is now TH-cam, even though it is unpaid (my videos would never have a wide enough appeal for me to generate much money from it) I have had some great comments (like yours), and I have enjoyed making virtual contact with many people from across the world. As you know, I also enjoy photography, videography, editing and research. Glad my video struck a chord with you, but I am sorry to hear that you have experienced many of the problems that I have experienced too. I am so glad that we are now in a more enlightened age, where these things can now be talked about, rather than trivially dismissed. Thanks again for a great comment, and for supporting my channel. Take care, Paul
@@westcountrywanderings Agree about telephones - a curse which I try and avoid as far as possible, preferring emails, where you go at your own pace and have time to reflect - and correct. Thank's for your reply.
I know exactly what you mean about 'small talk' being utterly exhausting. I have autism and I try to avoid scenarios where there is 'small talk'. I also suffer from anxiety and depression. However, in the right circumstances, I can perform very well (like you do). BTW, just a thought, but in order to avoid future people approaching you for small talk, maybe say 'I don't speak English, I am tourist' in a strange accent, smile then walk on. Lol.
Paul although not diagnosed I can relate to many of the characteristics you mention I can converse with people one to one but no more than that I also can only deal with facts and so cannot stand agenda driven virtue signalling and will correct people even in socially incorrect situations 😊
Oh, gosh yes! Agenda driven virtue signalling drives me mad! Yes, group conversations are a nightmare for me. I know that I am far from alone in that regard. It is almost if some humans have devised a social method of excluding other humans! Thanks so much, Cheers, Paul
Hi Paul, total respect to you for opening up on a whole range of issues & how they can affect you 💪🏻 Although I was unaware of your condition you do have a certain style which makes watching your videos even better in my opinion 👍Having completed the Wye Valley walk down to Chepstow I am near to completing the full circle back up the Severn Way (currently in Caersws) & I too found the more populated areas along the Severn Valley area a little tiresome when compared to the splendid isolation of most of our walks - so you’re not on your own. Indeed as bikerdave 1274 says below - maybe the 3 people in Stourport had similar issues although the camera probably acts as a magnet…….Keep up the good work as it’s nice to look back on the sections that I did last year as you head towards Worcester (all be it I was heading the other way 😂). All the best Steve
Thank you Steve and thanks for watching and commenting on my video. I hope to finish The Severn Way in a couple of months (fitting it in around other filming) down to Bristol - Part 17 (to Worcester) will be published soon. Happy walking! Cheers, Paul
No negativity meant by this, however the 3 people you met may well be in the same situation /mental /emotional states, but are then forcing /trying new things like stopping to have a little conversation with someone in the wild. Factors go on like photography /audio mics/ the lil doggy you got as a best friend, although all you need is a lick in the face accompanied by a shrill bark/Woof to get you to handle the rest of your day. Yerp I just waffled on fer no reason,... I gerrit I gerrit I gerrit. Actually seems like we are the norm now 😅😊❤
![[#2024MAMA] G-DRAGON - 무제(Untitled, 2014)+POWER+HOME SWEET HOME+뱅뱅뱅+FANTASTIC BABY | Mnet 241123 방송](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/Ox29z5Nf1Uk/mqdefault.jpg)
I don't normally comment on youtube videos, but I wanted to say thanks for this one. You explained things so clearly and in a way that's very relatable. I know not everyone's experiences of autism and/or mental health are exactly the same, but I felt I learnt a lot from listening to this. Thank you.
Thank you Martin.
Yes, there is a well worn 'joke' amongst the autistic 'community' that is: 'if you have met one person with autism, you have met one person with autism'. I think it is a quote from Stephen Shore (not the famous photographer, but an American autistic professor of special education, at the Adelphi University). We are all unalike, as well as alike.
As you say, the same applies to mental health - the human brain is a complex beast!
Thanks so much for the comment; it is greatly appreciated.
Take care,
Paul
Thanks Paul. I worked as a mental health professioal in the NHS for 25 years and have had a couple of bouts of anxiety myself. In my experience of working with my clients one of the issues that came up frequently was the problem of 'small talk'. None of them found it at all enjoyable for various reasons. One of those reasons was the one you described in your case of the 3 men who approached you in series asking about your equipment namely and to put put it bluntly, although well meaning, was the inability to know when to stop. The other thing I to mention and something I really enjoy about your videos is the peaceful and relaxed feel you create, whilst still providing good information and excellent stills images and footage. I should add that the music you choose for your vids is so good . . . you seem to get it just right and always conguent with the subject. Please keep keep it up in your way . . . Thank you
Thank you! That's a lovely comment.
Yes, you have picked on something, which although I have not spoken about before, is that I deliberately slow my videos down to make them more relaxing.
I find, often, that with a lot of videos on TH-cam, they are too fast paced for me, and bring out a nausea as an unwanted side effect, due to the speed at which they have been edited, and the very fast, ultra tempo, music.
I do try to edit the video and photos around the music, and not the other way around (i.e. the music isn't put on after, but first, like a base coat of paint). I thought that was how you were supposed to do it, but apparently many others don't!
I can rewatch some of my videos sometimes to help calm me down. I guess what I am trying to do is 'create' a world that is more calming to me, than the real one out there - I had not thought about it that way before!
Thanks so much for a very interesting comment.
Take care, Paul.
Raising awareness of such issues is always a good thing. In the words of a certain TH-camr, "Take care of yourself, look after yourself." 👍
Thank you - I wonder 🤔 which TH-camr says that? 😊 Thanks so much for watching and supporting my channel. Cheers, Paul.
Hi Paul, you explained yourself really eloquently in your video, well done and I hope it helps you as well.
I went back to have a look at the end of the video at Stourport and really couldn't see anything untoward that said I was thinking that it did look busy back in the park .... but that ice cream did look tempting!!
I've read all of the comments so far and there are some great suggestions for being prepared for these situations.
Thanks for all the hard work that you put into your videos we are all right behind you 100%.
Have a great weekend.
Thank you so much David. Thanks for your kind comments.
I have been blown away by the reaction to this video to be honest with you.
It is taking me longer to reply, because each comment deserves a considered reply, and to acknowledge just how useful and/or connected others have found this video.
As you say there has been some fantastic advice too.
Thanks again for your kind words and support - it is very much appreciated.
Take care,
Paul.
I can totally relate to stuff you've said. I've not been diagnosed with autism but I'm starting to wonder more and more if I have it. I do struggle socially. When I make a video, like you, I have to be in the right head space. One small negative thing can completely throw me. Some days I'm just not in the mood to talk so my videos will just get music over them. I often find it hard to explain how I'm feeling too....
I am glad that you found my little video relatable. If you do feel like that you may be autistic, then it could be worth seeing your GP. I do need to warn you though that the waiting lists for a diagnosis are quite lengthy, unfortunately.
You can see a psychologist privately, and/or you can also do autism self tests online, but you would need still need to get a professional to confirm this.
Yes, the one small negative thing! It gets me every time! It can mean that, although I do put a lot of effort into my videos, they can sometimes be a little 'uneven' insofar as how chatty in places that I am, and how silent in other parts of the video.
I think my audience is used to that now - hopefully!
Thank you for a lovely comment, and I do hope you can get any additional help and understanding that you may need.
Take care,
Paul
Paul, this was so well articulated and interesting and also relatable to. Thank you for taking the time to make this and to explain everything so well.
I can identify with a number of the difficulties you experience difficulties with like small talk etc.
It’s fantastic that you are able to share your experiences here and in so doing help others and their family members who may be experiencing similar.
Thanks for the mention too! It’s always a pleasure to collab with you.
Thank you Louise, and glad you found it relatable.
That's a lovely comment. Glad you found it interesting.
I do hope to make future videos on this topic occasionally on my channel.
Thanks for supporting my channel and, likewise, I do enjoy doing collabs with you too.
Take care, Paul.
Hi Paul, just to say well done for this explanation; I don’t think I’ve ever heard an explanation of this condition before, and such an articulate one. All of us could try our best to be an ally of those with lifelong health issues and be considerate and kinder. I will watch out for it in future and do my best.
The robin must be a good totem. 🙂
Thank you Ian, and thanks so much for your kind words too.
Glad my little video helped a little about understanding autism.
Take care, Paul 🙂👍
All I can say, then, Paul, is that your Autism is a blessing in disguise, if it drives you to produce such wonderful videos, which do not betray any sign of your condition, nor does your presence in the videos give any hint to it, were we not privy to it. Thankyou for that insight. And keep producing these videos, long and short, big bite, short bite!
Thank you Michael! Glad you took something from this little video. I will try to keep producing them for as long, and when, I am able to do so. Thanks again, Paul.
Well mate I watched it all the way through! It was as informative as all of your other videos.
Paul, please do not change your style and delivery, it is your uniqueness that makes your content so great.
Regards
Pete and Jayne
I found this interesting Paul. I like to visit my allotment early in the morning for two reasons. 1) it's so peaceful with just the birds and insects buzzing around and 2) there's rarely any other people there!
As other growers start to show up around 9 or 10am I'm usually ready to return home, so I can say good morning and chat if I choose, or make my excuses and leave. I also have my mobile phone set on silent whilst enjoying the great outdoors. I generally like people, but not too many at a time. You explained your condition very well here, and I hope you continue enjoying/filming for your channel. Best regards! ☺
I certainly agree with you hundreed per cent . There' nothing more healing than be at the allotment early in the morning
Yes, I agree with this too! So calming. Early in the morning is my favourite time of day - good for photography/videography too! Cheers, Paul.
Thank you!
Yes, early morning is a great time of day! Good for photography/videography too.
One of the reasons I prefer filming and photographing with my camera, rather than the more popular option these days of using a mobile phone, is precisely because I can leave my phone at home, or switch it off, and be in the moment with the image taking. Phones are far too distracting to me as a YT Creator.
Yes, I will certainly continue to film and photograph for as long as, and when I am, able to do so.
Thanks again for your kind words.
Take care,
Paul.
Thanks for taking on a sensitive topic and discussing it openly. I'm always curious to hear other people's perspectives and better understand their life experience.
I can see how being on the spectrum or being really introverted can be challenging when people are intrusively talking/questioning you at length.
I'm so glad that your channel is helping you with a hobby you enjoy and also helping you to process your mental health concerns. Good for you!!
All the best XX Dara
Thank you Dara!
Yes, doing TH-cam enormously helps me to keep going. I really enjoy watching your channel too - sorry I don't get chance to watch or comment on every video though. As you know, researching, filming, editing and promotion all takes time. But, I really enjoy the process.
Take care,
Paul.
Hi Paul, Thank you so much for this video, as this subject affects our family so I understand where you are cumming from. I think people just focus on really extreme cases and dont realise there are different degrees of Autism , that affect people differently. Thank you again for talking about it and helping us understand it a bit more.
Thank you so much and thanks for your kind words. Glad you found the video useful. I will occasionally return to this topic from time to time. Take care, Paul 👍🙂
Thank you paul i can understand you very well enjoy your videos
Thank you! Glad you watched this video and appreciated it. Thanks so much, take care, Paul
Thanks for sharing this. I have very similar experiences. I have eventually learned how to look very unapproachable and far fewer strangers attempt to engage with me these days. I have just started mentioning my autism at the start of all my videos to explain why my channel has a very particular presentation style which won’t be to everyone’s taste. I too have a series on Autism and other neurodivergent conditions. I enjoy your channel. I miss the West Country so I get to enjoy it vicariously through your videos
Thank you so much! That unapproachable look seems an interesting tactic. Thanks so much for watching and glad that the video struck a chord with you. Good to hear too that my Westcountry videos are of interest to you. Cheers, Paul.
Thanks for sharing brother, New friend here stay connected God bless you
Thank you! Glad you found it interesting. God Bless you too, Paul.
Well Done, Paul Thanks for this explanation. Your video's are so well done, that I would never have picked up on it. As others have voiced in these comments, I am somewhat plagued by some of these things. Crowds always bother me and I easily understand why distractions rob you of sense of order. I am glad you felt well enough to voice this. I am glad you feel you are among friends! Take Care, Jim
Thank you Jim.
That's very kind of you.
Glad you found the video interesting.
Take care,
Paul.
Thank you for explaining how this affects you. I'm guessing that Autism affects different people in different ways. Your video's are great and you present them very well. Thanks.
Thank you so much Martyn. Yes, it is a complex condition and, as you say, it affects everyone differently. Glad you enjoy my videos. Take care, Paul 🙂👍
You undoubtedly give all your subscribers a lot of pleasure in watching your excellent and well informed videos, I hope you can take pleasure and confidence from that. You look to have far more confidence than me, there’s no chance I would ever put myself in front of a camera! All the best 👍👍
Thanks Mark! I am far more comfortable in front of a lens than in front of people in a social situation. Thanks so much for watching and commenting. Cheers, Paul.
Hi Paul, Thank you for sharing your experiences and helping raise awareness of autism and metal health. Take care and stay safe. 😊😊
Thank you Diane and thank you for watching and commenting too.
Much appreciated.
Take care too, Paul.
Thank you Paul, this video is so enlightening. Our son is Autistic and he struggles with life at times. He is 35 years old and we are still learning as parents. I am particularly interested in your comment about "invading someone else's space" There are things that we do today that I now realize we should not be doing with regard to "invading someone's space" It's not easy believe you me. Many thanks and God bless.
Thank you Tony.
Yes, as you have seen, I struggle everyday because the world is designed by and for NTs (neurotypicals - i.e. people that are not neurodiverse (dyslexic, dyspraxic, autistic, etc) but things, thankfully, are slowly changing.
This is the third video I have made on this topic - I may return to it again in the future.
Glad it helped a little. There are lots of autistic TH-camrs that make videos specifically about this topic which you may find useful like: @ConnorWardUK and @StephanieBethany which you also may find useful.
Best Wishes to your family,
Paul
I think you expressed yourself really well in this video. You do remarkably well to put yourself anywhere near places & situations that could be difficult for you. We are all different. Take care of yourself.
Thank you Faith!
Thanks so much for watching and listening.
I do try to have a defence mechanism to prevent full on melt downs by having an escape route, or turning down things that are likely to be super stressful for me (like the film shoot with the famous TH-camr, and loads and loads of strangers).
Thanks again,
Take care,
Paul
Hi Paul thanks for the video and info 😊😊
Cheers Roy!
Wonderful video- my 17 year old identified with your words. Thank you. I love your calm narration and knowledge especially the canals (Thames and Seven, Stroud) and the railway videos . Keep up the good work.
Thank you - glad your 17 year old could identify with it.
It is a topic I will return to again at some point.
Glad you are enjoying the videos. I am currently background planning the next Cotswold Canals Update video (part 16, would you believe!) - hoping to go into production in a couple of weeks, and post prod early June.
Thanks so much,
All the Best!
Paul
Hi Paul, I truly enjoyed hearing your experiences with autism. Even though I learned about autism in university, it is still a bit tricky to understand how every person is a bit different. This helps to understand what others might be experiencing as well.
Thank you Donna.
Glad you found it interesting.
I do occasionally touch on this topic on my channel from time to time.
Take care,
Paul
I understand where you are coming from, as I struggle with life situations also. Sometimes, I just can't cope, and nobody gets it. I just have to get through these situations somehow. Life's hard!
Thank you Alice! Yes, indeed it is. Thanks so much for watching and commenting. Look forward to catching up with you again soon. Take care, Paul 👍🙂
Dear Paul, I am not autistic but I am very sensitive althoughmany people see me as ' hard nosed'and somone who can help in times of trouble. Helping others causes me stress because I feel a huge responsibility that my help or advice might result in making their problem worse. I have learned from these negative feelings and try to use stragegies to counter them.The most essential thing is the old boy scout's motto of being prepared and analyse one's motives and goals.. Of course one cannot prepare for unexpected eventualities, but your filming has shown that one problem keeps reoccuring. So if you are prepared,like Cathy Dyer advises below, I think one big problem will go away. Those of a sensitive nature find it hard to rebuff people who just want to chat because they do not like to be impolite. Sometimes the lesser of two evils is to risk being thought of as impolite. In truth I suspect anyone who you rebuff might think that you are rude but they will soon forget it. Your greater goal pf making a film to please many should be uppermost. My motto is, "One cannot help others if one first does not take care of oneself." Sensitive me did notice the lack of filimg in Stourport and I did wonder why. Thanks for the explanation. I repeat what you end any comments that I may make to tour videos. "Take care".
Some great, considered, advice there John - thank you for that. Much appreciated.
I will try to heed yours and Cathy's advice next time this situation arises.
Yes, developing coping strategies to survive is a fundamental.
One of the reasons of why I do TH-cam, and what, and crucially how and where, I film.
Thanks again and take care!
Paul
Hi Paul, I watched a lot of your video's and only just seen this 1. Thanks for explaining to us all, I don't really understand Autism that well but after you explained it makes alot of sense. you sound like a great bloke to talk to and lots of good stories about the local area etc but I'm kind of thinking I'd be a person which you probably would find draining with general chat as well I might try looking for signs more as never knew it effected people with Autism like this thank you for explaining.
Hello!
Thank you for watching this video.
It is quite a bit different from the others on the channel - although I have made an earlier one when I talk about autism too.
The thing to bear in mind is that everyone who is autistic is different - no two of us have exactly the same problems and diffculties, and we all portray in a different way.
However, there tend to be common strands.
I find social situations very overwhelming - I can mask to 'appear' normal (like an actor on stage), but it is exhausting, and I can't keep masking for extended periods.
I am very comfortable talking into the camera - I can always edit out the bits where I really word stumble or look awkward. I could never do a live stream, and I prefer to film in much quieter areas, not liking urban at all.
Doing photography and videography and running this channel is the only thing I have really enjoyed in my life - because there are no external pressures, or other people involved (apart from occasional collabs with people I feel comfortable with) and I can go at my own pace (which tends to be very slowly!).
Thanks again,
Cheers,
Paul
@westcountrywanderings many thanks for your reply Paul, you also mentioned you were diagnosed with Autism in 2004 sorry for my ignorance but I guess you had it all your life and not known about it? I guess it just can't get triggered when you were an adult? It's so interesting and thank you again for sharing you are a top man. 👍 cheers Ash
@ashjenkins7591 thank you, and, yes, it is something that you are born with and it stays with you.
The easiest way I can explain it is wiring - neuro typicals (non autistic and non ADHD/dyspraxia people) are wired with one configuration in the brain, but we (neurodiverse) are wired in a completely different way.
The world feels very alien to me, and it was largely designed by neurotypicals for neurotypicals.
There is nothing anyone can do to change that, but it is about adopting a lifestyle that is less disruptive and less painful and harmful as is possible. One of the reasons I do TH-cam is because I can go at my own pace, and film in places that I feel comfortable and safe.
Thanks again,
Paul
@westcountrywanderings thanks for explaining Paul it's good to learn about these things for people who haven't got Autism to understand. I have only recently noticed your video and I will do lots of your walks. After seeing your video on Severn Valley Railway we are going this weekend. Many thanks 😊
@@ashjenkins7591 Enjoy your day on The Severn Valley Railway!
Thank you for sharing this and for helping to raise awareness - this was very well explained and totally makes sense needing to be well to be able to articulate what it feels like to be when you're not feeling well.
Thank you Jesse!
Glad you appreciated this little video.
Thanks for your kind words too.
Take care,
Paul.
Hi Paul. Thank you for this video and you explained it very well. Its good that you enjoy making your youtube videos and that you have the time and freedom to choose topics and locations and have fewer of the restrictions and challenges of past jobs. Regarding Stourport..... what could have been seen as people chatting and delaying your filming ...ended up being much more disruptive and upsetting for you. The people who talked to you probably enjoyed the chat and thought they were being sociable. I have a possible solution. The 3 in a row seemed to be the problem. Maybe have a few sentences ready for this scenario where there are people about. Eg Sorry I cannot chat while filming as i quickly lose my focus due to autism. They should get the message and leave you in peace.
That's a good point Cathy!
In hindsight, I probably should have passed them one of my business cards too and asked them to get in touch with me on here or Facebook if they had any questions. The only trouble, is I hate letting people down, and I am not very good at thinking laterally on my feet! I will try to do that, if that situation happens to arise again.
Thanks so much for your support and kind comments.
Take care, Paul
Thank you.🙂
Hi Paul, a little late to this one, well only a year out! I don't know if I have Autism or whether its the Parkinson's, but I feel the same on so many of the things you mentioned. I don't do social occasions because I can't cope with small talk, and sometimes I feel I'm walking around a black pit on a crumbling path, other times I feel ok. Nice to get that off my chest. Thanks for making this film. Ron
Thank you Ron.
Glad it struck a chord with you, but not glad that you have experienced depression yourself. It is a horror to experience, and you gave a good description of it there.
Yes, I think I made this one, not just to highlight and talk about autism, but also mental health generally, and by doing what you enjoy (in my case and yours too, photography, walking & exploring outside) can help improve your mental health.
Thank you for being so candid in your comment.
Yes, social situations are a nightmare! I think that is a big area where a sizeable proportion of the public do not enjoy, but a lot are too afraid to admit it. There is, still, a social stigma in saying that one doesn't enjoy social events and experiences, and that people are just expected to enjoy it because others do.
Thank you for an excellent, honest, open and heartfelt comment.
Paul
Hi Paul.
I somehow came across this and glad I did.
This was a real eye opener. Never knew you had autism, but knowing ones closely who also have it, I understand (best I can) what you must be going through.
You do amazing considering 👍
Thanks so much Phil!
Glad you found it interesting.
It is a topic that I will return to occasionally.
Cheers,
Paul
Thank you for sharing such a personal video. My grandson, now age almost 13 has autism. Your personal insites are very helpful. As grandparents we are very familiar, known quantities so to speak, so have a great relationship with our grandson. We are always very mindfull of the situations we may place him in when he spends time with us but also quite relaxed about it. Anything that raises awareness of peoples differences and that we are all different is a good thing to do. Thank you.
Thank you Simon.
Glad you found this video helpful, particularly with giving insights into your grandson too.
You sound like you are both wonderful grandparents, and are both mindful of your grandson's needs, and boundaries to reduce his anxieties.
It is a topic that, although it is quite away from the normal main topics of my channel, I will return to again occasionally.
Thanks so much for watching and commenting.
Take care,
Paul.
Very interesting Paul, and thanks for just being yourself. God Bless and Take Care
Thank you Ted. That's very kind of you. I do hope that you and Carol have now settled well into your new home. Take care and God Bless too. Paul.
Hi Paul. i don't have autism but i suffer terribly with my Mental Health Mainly with anxiety and depression. i started doing TH-cam and have found that just walking now isn't Quite enough for me but since i have been filming ect i have got better. or at least i feel better after i have had the walk edited and uploaded. like you say everyone is different. anyway i would just like to thank you for sharing your experiences as with some of them i can relate to. so thank you as i realize that this kind of video takes a lot of guts and i am not sure i could have spoken so openly and Honestly. Best wishes Darren.👍👍
Thank you Darren - that is very kind of you.
Yes, walking, photography and exploring helps my mental health enormously. Having now taken early retirement at the age of 60, doing Westcountry Wanderings has given me a real focus to work on. It has helped me a lot - the beauty of it is that you can go at your own pace. If you don't feel like doing pieces to camera that particular day you don't have to - you do voiceovers, or research, or editing. It is so flexible and you can do as much, or as little, as you want.
I don't know if I spoke about this in this particular video, but I have found diet enormously important in looking after my mental health too. In particular, making sure I get enough of the Omega range (3, 6 & 9) through eating eggs (in moderation) and flaxseeds, as well as a range of nuts, like almonds.
I have found the supplement 5-HTP (from healthfood stores) to be a non-prescription help for depression too. You need to follow the directions carefully though.
I do mindfulness to help control my anxiety and I try not to take on too much each day.
Hope this helps in some little way.
Take care,
Paul
@westcountrywanderings paul, that's amazing, thank you I will look more into this, I have a b12 deficiency that I can now have injections for which is helping with my energy levels but understand that my diet could be improved 😉
Thanks a lot Paul. All your videos are interesting and thought provoking but this one and your others on mental health really stand out. When there is so much negativity on the internet these days, your candid and thoughtful videos really make a difference and lead to greater understanding. Thanks again.
That's very kind of you to say so - thank you!
Although this topic is not the main thrust of what my channel is about, I will occasionally return to this issue, as I realise that it affects many.
Thanks again,
Paul
@@westcountrywanderings Just to clarify, I love your more ‘regular’ videos as I spent my youth in the Glos area and really love all the memories your stuff reawakens with me. But I had a sibling with what was diagnosed as Asperger’s a few years ago. None of us had even heard of this all those years ago but I really wish we had access to the information which people like you are now sharing. Thanks again Paul.
@@Nigel_A Thank you! Yes, I was diagnosed with Asperger Syndrome too - although that term is no longer used - it is just autism now. Partially the reason is the term 'high functioning' is misleading as autistic capabilities aren't linear or uniform throughout a person's life (or, indeed, day sometimes) as I eluded to in the video. The other reason is that there is some evidence to say that Hans Asperger was a Nazi (he originally defined it), and had what he determined to be less able autistic children sent to the gas chambers in Nazi Occupied Poland and Austria. Horrid time of history I know. Thanks again, Paul.
@@westcountrywanderings Sorry if I offended using ‘Asperger’s’. I have lived in HK, China my whole adult life so we are not as PC nor as ‘informed’ as the UK - I had no idea about the Nazi background. It is a term my brother still uses as he knows I will understand. No offence meant. I feel my life is so much richer for everything he (and you) has shared about this. All the best.
@@Nigel_A No offence taken! A lot of medical personnel right across the world are not aware of this link either. I only became aware of it a couple of years ago.Thanks again, Take care, Paul.
Thank you for explaining your autism so well. My godson was diagnosed at an early age with autism. He appears to have ‘outgrown’ it but he could be masking it- he holds down a complex job- his brother seems to have lots of problems but is hopefully coping with them but I do worry about him. I think he is on the autistic spectrum but to my knowledge has never been diagnosed as such.
Directly I heard the music I knew it was Esther Abrami! I was listening to her 10 short music pieces late last night. (Another TH-camr has made a’tribute’ to her as he is a great fan.) It was such a coincidence to hear her again this morning! Thanks.
Ps I would post the link but have no idea how to do it.
Thank you Diana!
Glad you found the video useful. Yes, you don't outgrow autism - you have it for life - but it is not an illness, and it doesn't get worse of itself. It is most likely that he is mimicking others and masking. Unfortunately, masking all the time isn't healthy, and comes with its own stresses. It is good to take the mask off. That's why I find social situations so stressful too, and need my own space after a social event/meeting, so I can be myself, and take the mask off.
There are lots of people who have not been diagnosed, but struggle through life. A diagnosis does not take away the problems, and there is no help generally available, but it does help the person understand who they are, and why they are different from people who do not have autism.
Esther Abrami! What a talent! Yes, she is more known for her violin work nowadays, but a true creative musical genius. She has several piano tracks in the TH-cam library which are free to use copyright free for video creators. She has her own channel on YT too.
To share a video, you need to access TH-cam via a computer, laptop, tablet or mobile (rather than the Smart TV App). Underneath the video, near the description of it is a button that says 'share'. Click on it, then hit 'copy'. That will add the link to the video onto your device's clipboard. Then, go on to Twitter, or Facebook (you can't share on Instagram) or within an email/WhatsApp message, and click 'paste' inside the body of the text. Hope this helps!
Thanks again Diana,
Take care,
Paul
Ps I did NOT put the emoji in . They are appearing on a bar above the keyboard & I must have somehow hit it!
Your descriptions strike many chords with me. Apart from one-to-one conversations, which are usually OK; unstructured, informal gatherings, leave me at a loss, where, like you, I absent myself, or if this is not possible, I am simply an onlooker, an outsider, with no voice, or 'existance'. On the other hand, where relations are more structured and formal, I am more able to cope - for example, lecturing - with notes = to a room of students, or speaking in public. Things are still fraught, but nothing like the ordeal of 'fraternizing' before or after formal gatherings, or at party's - which are completely off limits for me. The feelings of inadequacy, low self-esteem, and lack of confidence, can dramatically affect my mental state, which is a kind of roller-coaster, though thankfully, without extremes. All the same, the inability to cope with such key aspects of everyday life, can be very disabling. I am now retired, but the problems have not gone away. Paradoxically, the structured, more formal occasions, which were for me, a kind of 'therapy', are no longer available. Nonetheless, it is good to talk - albeit, impersnally inside the Web. .
I only glossed over some of the issues in this little video Malcolm, and one of the very many things that I struggle with is telephones. I really hate picking up the phone, and much prefer email and text as a primary means of communication. One of the reasons is because I can't think quickly how to reply in a face to face conversation, and I often think of several possible replies, but it takes me a while to work through the 'best' one. I can also edit before hitting 'send' - you can't do that in a vocal conversation!
Yes, I much prefer one-on-one 'talk' too.
I can no longer work because of my roller coaster depression (employers don't want to hear 'I can't come in at 8am, but I can make up for it by working through tomorrow night'), but, like you, I do miss the more formal conversations of a work environment.
Although, 'work' for me is now TH-cam, even though it is unpaid (my videos would never have a wide enough appeal for me to generate much money from it) I have had some great comments (like yours), and I have enjoyed making virtual contact with many people from across the world. As you know, I also enjoy photography, videography, editing and research.
Glad my video struck a chord with you, but I am sorry to hear that you have experienced many of the problems that I have experienced too.
I am so glad that we are now in a more enlightened age, where these things can now be talked about, rather than trivially dismissed.
Thanks again for a great comment, and for supporting my channel.
Take care,
Paul
@@westcountrywanderings Agree about telephones - a curse which I try and avoid as far as possible, preferring emails, where you go at your own pace and have time to reflect - and correct. Thank's for your reply.
I know exactly what you mean about 'small talk' being utterly exhausting. I have autism and I try to avoid scenarios where there is 'small talk'. I also suffer from anxiety and depression. However, in the right circumstances, I can perform very well (like you do). BTW, just a thought, but in order to avoid future people approaching you for small talk, maybe say 'I don't speak English, I am tourist' in a strange accent, smile then walk on. Lol.
That sounds like a great tip - thank you 🙂👍 Cheers, Paul
Paul although not diagnosed I can relate to many of the characteristics you mention
I can converse with people one to one but no more than that
I also can only deal with facts and so cannot stand agenda driven virtue signalling and will correct people even in socially incorrect situations 😊
Oh, gosh yes! Agenda driven virtue signalling drives me mad!
Yes, group conversations are a nightmare for me. I know that I am far from alone in that regard. It is almost if some humans have devised a social method of excluding other humans!
Thanks so much,
Cheers,
Paul
Hi Paul, total respect to you for opening up on a whole range of issues & how they can affect you 💪🏻 Although I was unaware of your condition you do have a certain style which makes watching your videos even better in my opinion 👍Having completed the Wye Valley walk down to Chepstow I am near to completing the full circle back up the Severn Way (currently in Caersws) & I too found the more populated areas along the Severn Valley area a little tiresome when compared to the splendid isolation of most of our walks - so you’re not on your own. Indeed as bikerdave 1274 says below - maybe the 3 people in Stourport had similar issues although the camera probably acts as a magnet…….Keep up the good work as it’s nice to look back on the sections that I did last year as you head towards Worcester (all be it I was heading the other way 😂). All the best Steve
Thank you Steve and thanks for watching and commenting on my video.
I hope to finish The Severn Way in a couple of months (fitting it in around other filming) down to Bristol - Part 17 (to Worcester) will be published soon.
Happy walking!
Cheers, Paul
No negativity meant by this, however the 3 people you met may well be in the same situation /mental /emotional states, but are then forcing /trying new things like stopping to have a little conversation with someone in the wild. Factors go on like photography /audio mics/ the lil doggy you got as a best friend, although all you need is a lick in the face accompanied by a shrill bark/Woof to get you to handle the rest of your day. Yerp I just waffled on fer no reason,... I gerrit I gerrit I gerrit. Actually seems like we are the norm now 😅😊❤
Thank you. Cheers, Paul.