I can’t stress this enough, spending time around people that build you up instead of tear you down. Toxic people in my life made me think I was nothing. All it takes is one or two people that make you feel good and you realize how much the others were holding you back. Good luck everyone
Man, your content is amazing! I think you're one of the best youtubers when it comes to explaining and making self-improv videos. You're literally changing lives. Thank you and keep it up!
I came here to write the very same thing! Highly effective content!!! After the first 3 videos I now upvote before watching. My only issue is there is no "love it" button. Keep it up!!!
Basically it''s all about this quote: Action is agreat restorer and builder of confidence. Inaction is not only the result, but the cause, of fear. Perhaps the action you take will be successful; perhaps different action or adjustments will have to follow. But any action is better than no action at all.”
Living a really secluded life in my earlier youth I missed to develop a lot of social skills. Now that gets back to me, I'm really shy and introverted when meeting new people (especially women!) and really shut myself off, missing out on parties and get togethers and all like that. That is until you become one of my friends and I lose all my shyness. My friends call me a funny and handsome, I'm educated and I read a lot and write good stories and draw good pictures and teach martial arts and everything else and can also talk about almost everything. But since I never acquired those social skills I can not convey those qualities of myself. I don't know how to start a conversation without being awkward, and I often even fear picking up the phone or writing an e-mail. This results, as you said, in a most awkward behaviour and way of speech on my behalf. And this again results in me telling myself that I'm neither funny nor clever nor good looking, and the circle begins anew. But...ever since this leads me nowhere...I think I will try your tips and follow your advice. After all I have nothing to lose. Thank you for your help!
I can relate this to sports. I was great but never play as good in important games. The moment you said to "be dominant" it made a huge impact on my performance! Hate to sound boastful n shit but opponents feared me! I tend to be pessimistic before games and it's usually me overestimating my opponents. The moment i told myself to be dominant I was more focused on myself and how I can help the team instead of worrying about the other team. my performance was very optimistic and less anxious. I showed my true worth. Thanks MHM ! I see it as super healthy progress and improvement
Wow Alex. You really walk the walk. This video is great and actually speaks to my severe almost paralyzing fear of taking any action. Hard to imagine that you could really suffer from self esteem issues or body issues of professional issues. You are a great example.
I love your videos and always find them helpful in setting and achieving goals and developing habits. But I feel there's one thing that's a bit misrepresented about introverts at the beginning of this video. You seemed to link being introverted with lack of confidence, which isn't necessarily true. A person might be shy because they lack confidence, but that's not necessarily the same as being introverted. Being introverted is more about a person's level of arousal or sensetivity to social situations. An introverted person, for example, is re-energized by spending time alone, while an extrovert gets that from being around people. Being introverted therefore can't really be explained by lack of confidence. Some people are simply recuarged by time spent alone. Another important aspect of these two personality types is that a person can be within different rangers of the introvert/extrovert spectrum. You might enjoy and feel re-energized by spending time with friends, but still need some alone time at the end of the day, or really need to be alone during times of stress. The videos below explains the difference between being introverted vs. extroverted pretty well. Thanks for your videos and for the encouragement that you give to people striving toward their goals in life! th-cam.com/video/sfjN15zsPyQ/w-d-xo.html th-cam.com/video/AXV5t7wQWKU/w-d-xo.html
Great video Alex. My favorite tip is "small win" method. I have found this method absolutely helpful in boosting my self esteem. Another tip I would like to share is the"power pose" method which really helps in social interaction. Once again thank you very much for sharing this wonderful video.
I believe the reason why we're not confident is because we don't believe in our abilities. By improving yourself in an area in which you're unconfident you will slowly see yourself grow in this area which will change your beliefs about yourself and increase your confidence. I learned this by working on my insecurities, which I'm still doing. This may then give you momentum to overcome other obstacles. Confidence is not permanent it varies with your mood. I haven't yet found out how to maintain a high confidence level. But I believe that this can be reached by becoming the most authentic version of myself and be confident with the good and the bad, without shame.
I'm 24, soon to be 25.. I've been dreaming of starting my own business for so long but that feeling has been growing even stronger in the last few months.. ever since I started working where I am now.. If I had a 10/10 confidence I would move abroad and start my own online business. I'm working up the confidence right now but what do I do when the job I'm in atm is emotionally and physically draining me? How do I get out? I don't have the energy to even dream about starting my own.. (what's keeping me here is learning the skills here to get some experience and also the money.. unfortunately)
I'm pretty much intimidated and afraid of everyone in my town as a lot of them tend look at me suspiciously when I talk to them. I look/ am Middle Eastern, so it makes sense. My question is how are you able to carry on conversations when suspect racial/ ethnic prejudice comes into most interactions you have on a daily basis?
Hi there - I'm sorry to hear that. Being a white male I don't have much prejudice against me. I think the BEST thing you can do is be an incredible person - because word will spread that you are a good person. That's infinitely more important than your looks, although it might take time.
My lack of confidence is holding me back from making and releasing a rap album. Im a Jewish suburban white kid worried about what my family and friends would think about me releasing a rap album out of no where, but really I have bars for days that need to be heard! Maybe one day...
I keep having this problem all the time in nearly all social situations I'm in. Ile start conversation with one person and then another person starts talking over that person and then maybe another person. Everybody is talking over everybody else. How the hell does one deal with that?
The idea of going do the most scariest thing looks very good ! In fact it's all about getting of the comfort zone ;) I should try the girl thing but it's gonna be complicated because i'm 18 and looks 15 :(
Be patient then - come see my recent video, I looked like a BOY until age 26/27. Only recently do I look like a man. Use that time to perfect yourself, achieve your own goals, and keep trying.
"Fake it till you make it" means lie and lie and lie till someone believes you and makes you important. So thats why people suggest it. Got low self esteem ? well just make up things and say you did them. Yes its bad advice because it means dishonesty is rewarded and thats a bad lesson to teach anyone.
I believe the reason why we're not confident is because we don't believe in our abilities. By improving yourself in an area in which you're unconfident you will slowly see yourself grow in this area which will change your beliefs about yourself and increase your confidence. I learned this by working on my insecurities, which I'm still doing. This may then give you momentum to overcome other obstacles. Confidence is not permanent it varies with your mood. I haven't yet found out how to maintain a high confidence level. But I believe that this can be reached by becoming the most authentic version of myself and be confident with the good and the bad, without shame.
I can’t stress this enough, spending time around people that build you up instead of tear you down. Toxic people in my life made me think I was nothing. All it takes is one or two people that make you feel good and you realize how much the others were holding you back. Good luck everyone
Man, your content is amazing! I think you're one of the best youtubers when it comes to explaining and making self-improv videos. You're literally changing lives. Thank you and keep it up!
Thank you so much Jose, it means a lot to me
thanks :-)
I came here to write the very same thing! Highly effective content!!! After the first 3 videos I now upvote before watching. My only issue is there is no "love it" button. Keep it up!!!
Basically it''s all about this quote: Action is agreat restorer and builder of confidence. Inaction is not only the result, but the cause, of fear. Perhaps the action you take will be
successful; perhaps different action or adjustments will have to follow.
But any action is better than no action at all.”
Great quote
Living a really secluded life in my earlier youth I missed to develop a lot of social skills. Now that gets back to me, I'm really shy and introverted when meeting new people (especially women!) and really shut myself off, missing out on parties and get togethers and all like that. That is until you become one of my friends and I lose all my shyness. My friends call me a funny and handsome, I'm educated and I read a lot and write good stories and draw good pictures and teach martial arts and everything else and can also talk about almost everything. But since I never acquired those social skills I can not convey those qualities of myself. I don't know how to start a conversation without being awkward, and I often even fear picking up the phone or writing an e-mail. This results, as you said, in a most awkward behaviour and way of speech on my behalf. And this again results in me telling myself that I'm neither funny nor clever nor good looking, and the circle begins anew.
But...ever since this leads me nowhere...I think I will try your tips and follow your advice. After all I have nothing to lose. Thank you for your help!
I was like this a lot too - if it's important, just focus on self improvement.
I can relate this to sports. I was great but never play as good in important games. The moment you said to "be dominant" it made a huge impact on my performance! Hate to sound boastful n shit but opponents feared me! I tend to be pessimistic before games and it's usually me overestimating my opponents. The moment i told myself to be dominant I was more focused on myself and how I can help the team instead of worrying about the other team. my performance was very optimistic and less anxious. I showed my true worth. Thanks MHM ! I see it as super healthy progress and improvement
Love this Chris - and yeah, that inner game is one of the powerful things you find in really high achieving olympians.
Excellent speech
Wow Alex. You really walk the walk. This video is great and actually speaks to my severe almost paralyzing fear of taking any action. Hard to imagine that you could really suffer from self esteem issues or body issues of professional issues. You are a great example.
Thank you william. I still have lots of flaws, don't forget that. But I try really, really hard to improve. And I hated being unconfident.
"Flaming extrovert" lol
hahaha
I love your videos and always find them helpful in setting and achieving goals and developing habits. But I feel there's one thing that's a bit misrepresented about introverts at the beginning of this video. You seemed to link being introverted with lack of confidence, which isn't necessarily true.
A person might be shy because they lack confidence, but that's not necessarily the same as being introverted. Being introverted is more about a person's level of arousal or sensetivity to social situations. An introverted person, for example, is re-energized by spending time alone, while an extrovert gets that from being around people. Being introverted therefore can't really be explained by lack of confidence. Some people are simply recuarged by time spent alone.
Another important aspect of these two personality types is that a person can be within different rangers of the introvert/extrovert spectrum. You might enjoy and feel re-energized by spending time with friends, but still need some alone time at the end of the day, or really need to be alone during times of stress. The videos below explains the difference between being introverted vs. extroverted pretty well.
Thanks for your videos and for the encouragement that you give to people striving toward their goals in life!
th-cam.com/video/sfjN15zsPyQ/w-d-xo.html
th-cam.com/video/AXV5t7wQWKU/w-d-xo.html
Great video Alex. My favorite tip is "small win" method. I have found this method absolutely helpful in boosting my self esteem. Another tip I would like to share is the"power pose" method which really helps in social interaction. Once again thank you very much for sharing this wonderful video.
Great point sangeeth
I believe the reason why we're not confident is because we don't believe in our abilities. By improving yourself in an area in which you're unconfident you will slowly see yourself grow in this area which will change your beliefs about yourself and increase your confidence. I learned this by working on my insecurities, which I'm still doing.
This may then give you momentum to overcome other obstacles. Confidence is not permanent it varies with your mood. I haven't yet found out how to maintain a high confidence level. But I believe that this can be reached by becoming the most authentic version of myself and be confident with the good and the bad, without shame.
Totally agree with you
Another Great Video and awesome content ... I appreciate the work you do a lot
best piece of advice...
Great video man, keep it up!
Thanks Martin
These videos are amazing
Great video thanks
You're welcome Ken
You just say: OH HAI MARK!
I'm 24, soon to be 25.. I've been dreaming of starting my own business for so long but that feeling has been growing even stronger in the last few months.. ever since I started working where I am now.. If I had a 10/10 confidence I would move abroad and start my own online business. I'm working up the confidence right now but what do I do when the job I'm in atm is emotionally and physically draining me? How do I get out? I don't have the energy to even dream about starting my own.. (what's keeping me here is learning the skills here to get some experience and also the money.. unfortunately)
How about this - for today - just write down the vision on paper.
Can you tell us a bit more about that year. Im thinking abiut doing the same thing? Was it worth it?
I'm pretty much intimidated and afraid of everyone in my town as a lot of them tend look at me suspiciously when I talk to them. I look/ am Middle Eastern, so it makes sense. My question is how are you able to carry on conversations when suspect racial/ ethnic prejudice comes into most interactions you have on a daily basis?
Hi there - I'm sorry to hear that. Being a white male I don't have much prejudice against me. I think the BEST thing you can do is be an incredible person - because word will spread that you are a good person. That's infinitely more important than your looks, although it might take time.
"Every night for one year what I did was I went out to a club twice a week" - Alex Heyne
it's a nice video on confident....it's good...can you please post a video on public speaking ....it would be great....
If my confidence was a 10/10, I'd be smashing every honey on the block 😤
Antwun Trademark well give thanks it isn’t then. Child support or STDs would have certainly brought it back down.
Not being disrespectful btw, just saying that banging every honey on the block may not be the best idea.
My lack of confidence is holding me back from making and releasing a rap album. Im a Jewish suburban white kid worried about what my family and friends would think about me releasing a rap album out of no where, but really I have bars for days that need to be heard! Maybe one day...
haha you gotta drop that album man! just do it, it'll feel great! and be exhilarating! and let me know once you do :D
The beastie boys were Jewish so go for it!
I keep having this problem all the time in nearly all social situations I'm in.
Ile start conversation with one person and then another person starts talking over that person and then maybe another person.
Everybody is talking over everybody else.
How the hell does one deal with that?
Truth kinda slapped me in the face
It's not always pretty
I'm always 10/10 my man love u
The idea of going do the most scariest thing looks very good ! In fact it's all about getting of the comfort zone ;)
I should try the girl thing but it's gonna be complicated because i'm 18 and looks 15 :(
What's wrong with that?
ModernHealthMonk girls like men, not boys
Be patient then - come see my recent video, I looked like a BOY until age 26/27. Only recently do I look like a man. Use that time to perfect yourself, achieve your own goals, and keep trying.
If I was more confident, I would ask my boss to put me in sales full time. I would be the next 6 figure salesperson.
Don't ask, sell him on the idea
Trev has a good point, why not focusing on both?
"Fake it till you make it" means lie and lie and lie till someone believes you and makes you important. So thats why people suggest it. Got low self esteem ? well just make up things and say you did them. Yes its bad advice because it means dishonesty is rewarded and thats a bad lesson to teach anyone.
Agree
haha, true
I am afraid of running water ... I will swim to english channel is I had cofidence
Sup Dad
Put my projects on Facebook
"Fake it till you make it" is actually somewhat effective
Except for talking to attractive girls. In that case you actually need inner game
Yep... need a bit of both. Always try to truly improve more each year than before.
👎
I believe the reason why we're not confident is because we don't believe in our abilities. By improving yourself in an area in which you're unconfident you will slowly see yourself grow in this area which will change your beliefs about yourself and increase your confidence. I learned this by working on my insecurities, which I'm still doing.
This may then give you momentum to overcome other obstacles. Confidence is not permanent it varies with your mood. I haven't yet found out how to maintain a high confidence level. But I believe that this can be reached by becoming the most authentic version of myself and be confident with the good and the bad, without shame.
Very true! The best thing is an inside + outside approach - never stop taking action.