I graduate in August as a Psychiatric Nurse Practitioner and I think this episode has completely changed my philosophy as to how I see myself treating patients with their mental health needs. Thank you Dr. Attia for having Dr. Conti on for this inspiring chat. I just bought both of your books.
You may also be interested in the works, videos etc of Besser Van De Kolk, MD (The Body Keeps the Score) and Gabor Maté, MD. (The Myth of Normal). Best wishes to you, your work and your patients.
I lost my dad to suicide when I was 19 years old and I still have a hard time with the trauma of it all. Recently, my father-in-law was tragically killed in a car accident. Both of these deaths have just ripped me apart and I don't know how to cope sometimes. Thank you for this content. It means so much 💜
Sorry for your loss , I was the same when I lost my bro , we were tight and I looked up to him as he was a self made man , for me it was yoga and meditation with exercise , I realized I was mourning his life instead of celebrating it , bless up .
Paul Conti has saved my life. It is just that simple! He is actually listening to me like a friend. I strongly believe that you should get his book. You can do this, and you can just see how simple it is. I still have problems, but I'm not a bad person.
As dark as these days seem, you fine gentleman provide for me a glimmer of hope. I hope our world finds a way to amplify ideas that make sense, providing compassion for one another instead of more division. THANK YOU!.
While Peter is dissecting to the rawness, I hear and feel Paul's compassionate voice that is only on hearing, healing. Knowing as the answer to the trauma. Grateful for having an opportunity to listen to the wisdom of understanding oneself. May you feel fulfilled as you're helping others.🙏🏻
Tl;dr Acknowledging the harm our ”mental health” system causes is powerful. Thank you. This amazing interview struck a chord with me. 1st law school seemed like the best way to help. That system was so flawed it made attempts at change seem futile. Thought I could use a degree in psychology and computer science to fight from the bottom up by starting with healing the individual. I'd use machine learning to clearly define the problem, and maybe solutions that met the needs of clients, practitioners, and insurance companies, etc. Nope. It was inspiring to hear someone say ”being exposed to the mental health system leaves them worse off (paraphrased)” - this is the first time I've heard a respected practitioner who attended the 'right' schools acknowledge this. When I realized it's impossible to help people while following this systems rules or making a living, back to school I headed. Public Health is where I've currently landed. Thank you, thank you, thank you both, and everyone who helps make this podcast possible. I'm looking forward to exploring Dr. Conti's work and more episodes of this show.
It’s conversations like this one that when heard by a person who is open to living a better life, begins to unlock the proverbial door of shame. Good mental health should be taught in primary education to kindergartners bc many times families do not know how to properly communicate with and help the ones they love.
This interview is a gem and the best one I think I've seen with Dr. Conti. I'm going to rewatch this. I ordered the book last week and it's in at my local bookstore. I can't wait to pick it up and read it. His comments are so wise and really a wonderful and compassionate perspective on the human paradigm right now. If my father had had him as a psychiatrist, he might still be alive today; I talk all of this very seriously. Grateful!
Pete Walker mentioned in his work that if we truly embraced healing trauma the DSM would be reduced down to a pamphlet sized book because the human experience isn't embraced and healed. PTSD/CPTSD are both trauma responses that get labelled other things.
I'm beginning to feel this way too after everything Ive been through. I never knew my mental health issues stemmed from cptsd from childhood. My family thought my illness "came out of the blue" and had nothing to do with my childhood
Brilliant conversation. It generates 2 questions for me. 1) why do you suppose the human emotional response to trauma is shame? 2) how do psychological professionals protect themselves from vicarious trauma?
My understanding is roughly: Shame binds all your energy. You freeze. A lot of trauma arises in the face of objective powerlessness and shame is efficient at freezing people as a survival mechanism if fight and flight fail.
Such a beautiful conversation. I am passing this on to all the folks who are working on healing their traumatic experience. Greetings to Dr. Conti from a resident along the Delaware Raritan Canal. Being in our wild places helps to calm down and heal.
Domestically abuse survivor and have been struggling immensely post a divorce that I didn’t want but needed because spouse didn’t seek therapy. He’s moved on and I haven’t = CRAZY trauma and cpstd. My childhood plays a large part into this trauma as well
That's an extremely interesting analogy. What trauma seeds embedded in your soil to make it grow? Reminds me of a dream I had when I finally escaped my family's house. I dreamed that I was a tree that was dying because there was a dead cat in the roots of my tree. From that dream, I knew that I had to get the dead, decaying cat out from under my roots. That analogy actually makes a lot of sense to me.
Thank you so much! Just listening to you is helping more than many hours with so to therapists! One Love! Always forward, never ever backward!! ☀️☀️☀️ 💚💛❤️ 🙏🏿🙏🙏🏼
I love NAMI but I took their 3 months course and not once they mentioned Trauma or Internal Family Systems Treatment. It does not make sense to me. The focus was on CBT, Pharma and peer groups. I love the peer groups and information provided but someone needs to tell them to add IFS and Trauma!!!
There’s emotions anonymous - maybe have a trauma anonymous? 12 step programmes are a brilliant way to unpack stress & trauma - have you guys experienced a 12 step meeting? It’s like trying to describe love
Every family should sit down and watch this and have a Q&A and talk to their children I’ve suffered every kind of trauma. There is throughout my 55 years and no one seems to realize especially parents and those blinded by our godless culture and society is that trauma can be as small as leaving your baby in the crib while he or she is crying that’s trauma all they know in the world is your touch your smell your feel Your breast, their mothers milk when that’s not there it’s trauma there traumatized This man speaks volumes, coming from the same background, the same town, and as I said, experiencing so many traumas in so many ways, listening to him, and luckily, I am somewhat insightful as well. I know what I’ve been through and I know who I am, and what I do, despite my inability to make all the positive changes need to make in my life for my children, who are taken from me Illegally how traumatizing is that? In any event, everyone should listen to this man to gain insight into yourselves to help you deal with the struggles and the perils of life Of course, trusting in God, even when it’s so hard, sometimes to understand why we suffer the way we do on this earth
Fabulous talk. I actually had the appendix abscess in the right gutter that was impressively large, so it was an appropriate metaphor. Occasional pain from the resulting adhesions still reminds me I’m alive - not septic - grateful for skilled doctors! The tugging pain is a reminder to live every day and move stealthily through trauma and to examine it & make friends with it. Keep these wonderful podcasts going, Peter. After the last two years of societal division, all of us collectively have a bit more trauma to process. 😉
I’d love to see a panel discussion between Peter Attia, John Conti and Brené Brown. She is a PhD social worker that has done a ton of research on shame.
I was molested by my much older cousin's beginning sometime before kindergarten until 2nd grade. Tried to tell my mother but she told me I was disgusting for saying such a thing, so gross why would a pretty little girl talk like that? When I was 12 my forty something year old brother in law manipulated me into a sexual "relationship" shortly before my 13th birthday. I can recall learning that he was only using me the week before my birthday. I tried to kill myself shortly afterwards and ended up in a hospital for a month and a half. Four years later I got pregnant with my boyfriend at the time, and had an abortion. Three years later we got married and pregnant again. About six months later I had a seizure due to an undiagnosed AVM. Which then required multiple brain surgeries and about two years of pt... shortly after my first surgery I learned that my husband used pornography and had lied about it all along, which is particularly disturbing for me because my abusers used porn and to me pornography is abuse. Anyway I stuffed it all down and kept plowing ahead... finished nursing school, had three more children, moved up in my career into management... about 10 years after my first surgery I had knee surgery for bone spurs and ended up with septic arthritis and needing a pic line for antibiotics. Then my father got critically ill and we moved him into our home to care for him for the following 12 years. Almost immediately after my father passed away I had another seizure only to learn that 19 years after the first, that I had an additional venous malformation which was devastating and terrifying. About a week later I learned my husband had been unfaithful all along. Now at 45 I am forced to finally face all this... I can no longer run away. Unfortunately I am just exhausted.😪
Wonderful presentation, thank you! Acknowledging access to mental healthcare is a large issue is also important. Healthcare in the U.S. favors the rich. Even if a person has mental health coverage, copays and coinsurance may be too expensive for a person to afford.
AA helps people stop drinking. Giving time to reduce the shame with sharing. You need to be sober then take the abscess off the shelf and drain it with understanding. To be done within the group or with your beautiful understanding and help
I think that in terms of two different siblings going different route scenarios. Your measuring success by external factors. But nobody looks at that successful persons ability to manage stress emotionally, physically, financially. And I’d be interested to see if they ARE actually good at dealing with these things. If they are OCD, a bully, etc.
10:32 this is kind of a general comment about society, not a damnation of the speaker, but don’t we see? This is how the hierarchy works. Success comes from this transient lack of empathy due to a desire to rise above everyone else, instead of connecting with everyone else in an open, honest, caring way. 45:00 We cry watching the news because this is what successful politicians, generals, arms manufacturers, and “patriots” do to their victims: the supply of human targets known as “the others.” These “others” are what gives the malignant something to work on, and the beneficent someone to work with. Nearly every mind can be healed. The minds of those who act upon others, and also those who are acted upon. Problem is when you meet a new behavioral health provider, you don’t know if they’re malignant or beneficent during the fraction of an appointment when they see you.
my daughter, 26 years old, was left at an ER dead . I still do not know what happened. The medical examiner report still says cause of death is pending, M sister had a stroke upon learning of my daughters death, she passed two months later. I do not know how to feel ot what to do next,
People who commit suicide are people who dont get emotional support. Believe me that each part of cells in our body try to survive, so it is actually take a lot of thoughts before doing it and actually doing it. Emotional support is essensial. Also, never put any shame to your kids. Let's all own shame people put on us and you dont have to feel guilty when people put shame on you. You do you, take many time as much as you like. doesnt care if it takes years. But keep getting better tho it's only less then 1% per day. We gotta live until 95 y.o. We can survive and our body are designed to do so.
This is the first time ive really realised that when I experienced back to back trauma that my "brain felt broken" :( I feel like one side of my brain is off and I can't think properly :(
The aspect they kept circling around, but, (in my humble opinion) never fully addressed sufficiently was this: why one event or "childhood" could be traumatic for one child, and not for another. Paul alluded to "gene variations" which I agree with, but this isn't sufficiently concrete ---to satisfy me or even Peter ---from what I could tell. As others have alluded to, Gabor Mate speaks to this to some extent----the more sensitive the child, the more susceptible he / she is to absorbing external events in a traumatic way (stimulus overload---anxiety...threats). I Suspect that this may even be the other side of the coin of some forms of intelligence, i.e., there is no free lunch in life--the price you pay. Intelligence to some extent is perception and while you may be a sponge for soaking up knowledge, the same individual may be easily traumatized and overwhelmed, and then, seek forms of escape....seek comfort...and longer term have a damaged hedonic system. Hello substance abuse.
So relate to this.Lost my beautiful, talented, sensitive forever 21 year old son, John, to s- 2013. He was a musician, artist, writer, lax player. Huge heart. Studying philosophy. My heart forever crushed.
@@rgdden2702I can relate. I should be dead--I almost overdosed 3x on meth, but my heart kept beating, God only knows why--perhaps from the endless years of marathon training. didn't have abusive parents. I just was an anxious, sensitive, intelligent kid. I still have a professional job in nyc, but have held onto it while walking a razor's edge.
@@rgdden2702 thanks. It’s a pretty unique experience approaching death +\- 100 times lying on the floor of my apt’s kitchen. I don’t know why I’m alive my heart should have stopped and I was too stupid to call 9/11. I rolled the dice and lived.
I would love to take my son to see him. He is so traumatized after bullying that drove him to psychosis. I would pay whatever, money isn’t a problem and my son’s life has no price. But I can’t find him anywhere to book an appointment. Does anyone knows how I can find him?
I think this is a great topic for debate. I do agree that trauma is the root of most mental illnesses. But I also believe, that trauma is innate and inherent in human system. There's a sense of victimization that's conveyed in this conversation that doesn't feel right. You can't remove suffering from the human experience. There is a balance between empathy, and reality that just seems lost in Paul's POV.
I just wrote a comment here about the victim culture. Personally I think if someone has to tell you you are traumatized and it comes as a great shock, then . . . .? Trauma is the buzz word in our culture and overusing it like this is helping what? Helping sell books.
Agreed: for example the narcissist fears shame or being exposed. But once they do, they move on with supply that is unaware of their past. Meanwhile the narcissist’s victim is forced to somehow put the pieces of their life back together
Never talked about is people who feel shame and guilt and trauma due to their *own* bad actions. We are living in a victim culture. Who is even left to be blamed when everyone is a victim? None of the people who ever did me wrong lost a minute of sleep over it. Most of them did do a lot of self talk about how it wasn't really their fault because they have an "excuse" which is the next major thread in our culture, you're inevitable victim-hood then excuses your own bad behavior. What is empowering and what is crippling? When are excuses helpful and when are they misused and abused? Another thing not talked about here is that non-objective diagnoses can easily destroy lives and it happens all the time and pinning someone with the stigma of a mental health problem is a burden and a barrier to care within the medical system. As soon as your new cardiologist sees you carry a diagnosis of trauma, believe me, it will change how they deal with you. You may think you are a victim and will get pity from the world but you're waving a red flag to everyone. Not fair, not reasonable. But, I"m just sayin' . . .
I do know that trauma would affect a potential child years later. Maybe it's residual stress + epigenetics.... I missed the part about how to actually break the cycle tho
Hospitals will just straight up tell you they don't have anyone that's good with trauma. And if you try to go anyway it just becomes obvious that they're right. They don't.
Skilled trauma therapists will try hard to help clients stay out of an inpatient setting unless absolutely necessary. But not every therapist is skilled at treating trauma disorders, and they may work for programs that have rigid rules. Or they fear being sued. Or all three. Do not expect a hospital to do much more than prevent you from committing suicide while you are there. That is about it.
Peter was wonderful going depth by asking meaningful and interesting questions but i was very disappointed by Dr.Conti because he didn't give one straight and clear answer to what Peter's meant and i find that frustrating because i wasted 2 hours waiting for him to get to the point where we can use tools for shame and trauma and all he was doing just nagging and answering important questions with shallow , vague and irrelevant answers.
Same here , was a waste of time , usually i enjoy Peter's content but this time his Guest presented unfortunately bad and trivial information, i couldn't benefit from it at all. I felt all he wanted just to promote his book not providing a beneficial information.
If i can have a dollar for time he says ‘right’ id be millionaire. He needs to go to taskmaster’s and NLP class. Really hard to follow him….right! 😜 😵💫🤯
Pres Donald Trump and his alcoholic brother who died are an example of coming from the same early environment and having different results. Donald won't touch alcohol after seeing his brother's suffering. He has the survivor rationality. They both grew up with heavy stress under their authoritarian father, one got broken.
It's simply an expression, there's nothing wrong with it, and it's not traumatizing. You may need to practice ignoring it and focus on learning instead.
*"If you want to leave a happy life tie it to a goal, not to people or objects"* ~ Albert Einstein _Nevertheless investment are stepping stones to achieving your goals_ ✅
@Christopher McLaughlin I had a bad experience investing on my own until I met Mr. Charles R Schwab, I have made over $400,000 Trading cryptocurrency, I even made a whooping $28000 on my last trade with a capital of $3000.
I also trade with Mr Charles Schwab, and i must say he makes money making seem a whole lot easier right now I'm a single parent and i pay the bills comfortably since i met Charles Schwab, he's absolutely amazing and I'd recommend him for any novice in crypto.
Take it from one who has it and buy a house in Missouri and dream Wrangler with forex trade profits. I started with Mr Charles Schwab of financial education and he has been my handler and guider for the past years
The Health Care Systems in America (which is Corporate Medicine) isn't really inteterested in 'Helping People' b/c just like Chris Rock said, 'Their Ain't no MONEY in the cure'... And, 'how a drug dealer makes his money, is on the COME BACK'... And, IF a person is considered a 'Liability' in society and the Health 'care' can't make any money off of their 'clients' Euthanasia awaits in secret Eugenics oriented Amerika (now)...
The term you used far too many times ‘committed suicide’ - my good God. Please. Stop. It’s archaic and triggering for those of us who have lost loved ones to suicide. The better terminology is ‘died by suicide’. It’s traumatizing to me to hear you rattle off commit s-...commit s....commits. If I share the reason for my son’s tragic passing, my word choice is that my beautiful forever 21 year old son tragically took his own precious life. Not the clinical cold and stigmatizing he ‘committed s’. Please consider how powerful and hurtful that term is and please change your word choice. Thank you for your consideration.
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I graduate in August as a Psychiatric Nurse Practitioner and I think this episode has completely changed my philosophy as to how I see myself treating patients with their mental health needs. Thank you Dr. Attia for having Dr. Conti on for this inspiring chat. I just bought both of your books.
You may also be interested in the works, videos etc of Besser Van De Kolk, MD (The Body Keeps the Score) and Gabor Maté, MD. (The Myth of Normal). Best wishes to you, your work and your patients.
I lost my dad to suicide when I was 19 years old and I still have a hard time with the trauma of it all. Recently, my father-in-law was tragically killed in a car accident. Both of these deaths have just ripped me apart and I don't know how to cope sometimes. Thank you for this content. It means so much 💜
may GOD HELP YOU
You might want to explore Buddhism. Not as a religion but a healing modality. Wishing you peace
@@daysjours that's funny you say that, my husband just mentioned that he's been looking into it. For the healing factors. ✨️
Sorry for your loss , I was the same when I lost my bro , we were tight and I looked up to him as he was a self made man , for me it was yoga and meditation with exercise , I realized I was mourning his life instead of celebrating it , bless up .
What a life you’ve lived 💔 my heart feels for you and my heart breaks for you.
Paul Conti has saved my life. It is just that simple! He is actually listening to me like a friend. I strongly believe that you should get his book. You can do this, and you can just see how simple it is. I still have problems, but I'm not a bad person.
As dark as these days seem, you fine gentleman provide for me a glimmer of hope. I hope our world finds a way to amplify ideas that make sense, providing compassion for one another instead of more division. THANK YOU!.
Lovely words❤
I come for the science, and yet still get the most out of the podcasts such as these. Paul Conti is a really good human.
While Peter is dissecting to the rawness, I hear and feel Paul's compassionate voice that is only on hearing, healing. Knowing as the answer to the trauma.
Grateful for having an opportunity to listen to the wisdom of understanding oneself. May you feel fulfilled as you're helping others.🙏🏻
Tl;dr
Acknowledging the harm our ”mental health” system causes is powerful. Thank you.
This amazing interview struck a chord with me.
1st law school seemed like the best way to help. That system was so flawed it made attempts at change seem futile. Thought I could use a degree in psychology and computer science to fight from the bottom up by starting with healing the individual. I'd use machine learning to clearly define the problem, and maybe solutions that met the needs of clients, practitioners, and insurance companies, etc.
Nope.
It was inspiring to hear someone say ”being exposed to the mental health system leaves them worse off (paraphrased)” - this is the first time I've heard a respected practitioner who attended the 'right' schools acknowledge this.
When I realized it's impossible to help people while following this systems rules or making a living, back to school I headed.
Public Health is where I've currently landed.
Thank you, thank you, thank you both, and everyone who helps make this podcast possible. I'm looking forward to exploring Dr. Conti's work and more episodes of this show.
Incredibly beautiful conversation. It was inspirational and so heartfelt. I felt privileged to listen to it. Thank you!
It’s conversations like this one that when heard by a person who is open to living a better life, begins to unlock the proverbial door of shame. Good mental health should be taught in primary education to kindergartners bc many times families do not know how to properly communicate with and help the ones they love.
This interview is a gem and the best one I think I've seen with Dr. Conti. I'm going to rewatch this. I ordered the book last week and it's in at my local bookstore. I can't wait to pick it up and read it. His comments are so wise and really a wonderful and compassionate perspective on the human paradigm right now. If my father had had him as a psychiatrist, he might still be alive today; I talk all of this very seriously. Grateful!
Pete Walker mentioned in his work that if we truly embraced healing trauma the DSM would be reduced down to a pamphlet sized book because the human experience isn't embraced and healed. PTSD/CPTSD are both trauma responses that get labelled other things.
I'm beginning to feel this way too after everything Ive been through. I never knew my mental health issues stemmed from cptsd from childhood. My family thought my illness "came out of the blue" and had nothing to do with my childhood
Thank you Dr. Peter Attia for this content.
Brilliant conversation. It generates 2 questions for me. 1) why do you suppose the human emotional response to trauma is shame? 2) how do psychological professionals protect themselves from vicarious trauma?
My understanding is roughly: Shame binds all your energy. You freeze. A lot of trauma arises in the face of objective powerlessness and shame is efficient at freezing people as a survival mechanism if fight and flight fail.
What an incredibly insightful comment. Thank you.
If you could provide some of your resources, they would be truly welcome.
Such a beautiful conversation. I am passing this on to all the folks who are working on healing their traumatic experience. Greetings to Dr. Conti from a resident along the Delaware Raritan Canal. Being in our wild places helps to calm down and heal.
Domestically abuse survivor and have been struggling immensely post a divorce that I didn’t want but needed because spouse didn’t seek therapy. He’s moved on and I haven’t = CRAZY trauma and cpstd. My childhood plays a large part into this trauma as well
That's an extremely interesting analogy. What trauma seeds embedded in your soil to make it grow? Reminds me of a dream I had when I finally escaped my family's house. I dreamed that I was a tree that was dying because there was a dead cat in the roots of my tree. From that dream, I knew that I had to get the dead, decaying cat out from under my roots. That analogy actually makes a lot of sense to me.
Great symbology sent from your inner wisdom. Our soul wants to communicate.
Thank you so much! Just listening to you is helping more than many hours with so to therapists!
One Love!
Always forward, never ever backward!!
☀️☀️☀️
💚💛❤️
🙏🏿🙏🙏🏼
Phenomenal discussion 👏. Thanks Dr Attia and Dr Conti !!
Great conversation, just excellent in so many ways, compassionate, knowledgeable and a lot of wisdom coming through. Thanks guys.
Great conversation with dr Conti.
01:37:57 - The antidote to shame and the need for discourse and understanding
I love NAMI but I took their 3 months course and not once they mentioned Trauma or Internal Family Systems Treatment. It does not make sense to me. The focus was on CBT, Pharma and peer groups. I love the peer groups and information provided but someone needs to tell them to add IFS and Trauma!!!
The antidote to shame is self-compassion. Chris Germer PhD
You describe trauma well. Although I agree that trauma needs to be taught early, I can also see it being taught poorly enough that it could be worse.
We take children lightly
Thank you for this enlightening conversation.
Great work Peter and Paul
One Love!
Always forward, never ever backward!!
☀️☀️☀️
💚💛❤️
🙏🏿🙏🙏🏼
There’s emotions anonymous - maybe have a trauma anonymous?
12 step programmes are a brilliant way to unpack stress & trauma - have you guys experienced a 12 step meeting? It’s like trying to describe love
Every family should sit down and watch this and have a Q&A and talk to their children
I’ve suffered every kind of trauma. There is throughout my 55 years and no one seems to realize especially parents and those blinded by our godless culture and society is that trauma can be as small as leaving your baby in the crib while he or she is crying that’s trauma all they know in the world is your touch your smell your feel Your breast, their mothers milk when that’s not there it’s trauma there traumatized
This man speaks volumes, coming from the same background, the same town, and as I said, experiencing so many traumas in so many ways, listening to him, and luckily, I am somewhat insightful as well. I know what I’ve been through and I know who I am, and what I do, despite my inability to make all the positive changes need to make in my life for my children, who are taken from me Illegally how traumatizing is that?
In any event, everyone should listen to this man to gain insight into yourselves to help you deal with the struggles and the perils of life
Of course, trusting in God, even when it’s so hard, sometimes to understand why we suffer the way we do on this earth
Fabulous talk. I actually had the appendix abscess in the right gutter that was impressively large, so it was an appropriate metaphor. Occasional pain from the resulting adhesions still reminds me I’m alive - not septic - grateful for skilled doctors! The tugging pain is a reminder to live every day and move stealthily through trauma and to examine it & make friends with it. Keep these wonderful podcasts going, Peter. After the last two years of societal division, all of us collectively have a bit more trauma to process. 😉
I’d love to see a panel discussion between Peter Attia, John Conti and Brené Brown. She is a PhD social worker that has done a ton of research on shame.
I was molested by my much older cousin's beginning sometime before kindergarten until 2nd grade. Tried to tell my mother but she told me I was disgusting for saying such a thing, so gross why would a pretty little girl talk like that? When I was 12 my forty something year old brother in law manipulated me into a sexual "relationship" shortly before my 13th birthday. I can recall learning that he was only using me the week before my birthday. I tried to kill myself shortly afterwards and ended up in a hospital for a month and a half. Four years later I got pregnant with my boyfriend at the time, and had an abortion. Three years later we got married and pregnant again. About six months later I had a seizure due to an undiagnosed AVM. Which then required multiple brain surgeries and about two years of pt... shortly after my first surgery I learned that my husband used pornography and had lied about it all along, which is particularly disturbing for me because my abusers used porn and to me pornography is abuse. Anyway I stuffed it all down and kept plowing ahead... finished nursing school, had three more children, moved up in my career into management... about 10 years after my first surgery I had knee surgery for bone spurs and ended up with septic arthritis and needing a pic line for antibiotics. Then my father got critically ill and we moved him into our home to care for him for the following 12 years. Almost immediately after my father passed away I had another seizure only to learn that 19 years after the first, that I had an additional venous malformation which was devastating and terrifying. About a week later I learned my husband had been unfaithful all along. Now at 45 I am forced to finally face all this... I can no longer run away. Unfortunately I am just exhausted.😪
Wonderful presentation, thank you! Acknowledging access to mental healthcare is a large issue is also important. Healthcare in the U.S. favors the rich. Even if a person has mental health coverage, copays and coinsurance may be too expensive for a person to afford.
It’s like this guy is describing my inner self
AA helps people stop drinking. Giving time to reduce the shame with sharing. You need to be sober then take the abscess off the shelf and drain it with understanding. To be done within the group or with your beautiful understanding and help
Thank you Dr. Attia
I think that in terms of two different siblings going different route scenarios. Your measuring success by external factors. But nobody looks at that successful persons ability to manage stress emotionally, physically, financially. And I’d be interested to see if they ARE actually good at dealing with these things. If they are OCD, a bully, etc.
Thank you Doctors
If you found this conversation engaging and helpful. Search for Dr Gabor Mate talking on the subject of trauma.
Damn peter doing the podcast with bruises from sparring is the realest thing I've seen from a medical doctor mental health advocate
Thanks for this, Gentlemen!
Whole Societies need of help!
10:32 this is kind of a general comment about society, not a damnation of the speaker, but don’t we see?
This is how the hierarchy works.
Success comes from this transient lack of empathy due to a desire to rise above everyone else, instead of connecting with everyone else in an open, honest, caring way.
45:00 We cry watching the news because this is what successful politicians, generals, arms manufacturers, and “patriots” do to their victims: the supply of human targets known as “the others.”
These “others” are what gives the malignant something to work on, and the beneficent someone to work with.
Nearly every mind can be healed. The minds of those who act upon others, and also those who are acted upon.
Problem is when you meet a new behavioral health provider, you don’t know if they’re malignant or beneficent during the fraction of an appointment when they see you.
I think you understand it.
so true , trauma is under estimated
Profound trauma comes so young for some people. And again we didn't have a language to discuss it.
my daughter, 26 years old, was left at an ER dead . I still do not know what happened. The medical examiner report still says cause of death is pending, M sister had a stroke upon learning of my daughters death, she passed two months later. I do not know how to feel ot what to do next,
Thank you
People who commit suicide are people who dont get emotional support. Believe me that each part of cells in our body try to survive, so it is actually take a lot of thoughts before doing it and actually doing it. Emotional support is essensial. Also, never put any shame to your kids. Let's all own shame people put on us and you dont have to feel guilty when people put shame on you. You do you, take many time as much as you like. doesnt care if it takes years. But keep getting better tho it's only less then 1% per day. We gotta live until 95 y.o. We can survive and our body are designed to do so.
This is the first time ive really realised that when I experienced back to back trauma that my "brain felt broken" :( I feel like one side of my brain is off and I can't think properly :(
We ignored and out of sight
The aspect they kept circling around, but, (in my humble opinion) never fully addressed sufficiently was this: why one event or "childhood" could be traumatic for one child, and not for another. Paul alluded to "gene variations" which I agree with, but this isn't sufficiently concrete ---to satisfy me or even Peter ---from what I could tell.
As others have alluded to, Gabor Mate speaks to this to some extent----the more sensitive the child, the more susceptible he / she is to absorbing external events in a traumatic way (stimulus overload---anxiety...threats). I Suspect that this may even be the other side of the coin of some forms of intelligence, i.e., there is no free lunch in life--the price you pay. Intelligence to some extent is perception and while you may be a sponge for soaking up knowledge, the same individual may be easily traumatized and overwhelmed, and then, seek forms of escape....seek comfort...and longer term have a damaged hedonic system. Hello substance abuse.
So relate to this.Lost my beautiful, talented, sensitive forever 21 year old son, John, to s- 2013. He was a musician, artist, writer, lax player. Huge heart. Studying philosophy. My heart forever crushed.
He was 15 when his dad filed for divorce; rocked his world. Beginning of the end. Found stinking marijuana.
@@rgdden2702I can relate. I should be dead--I almost overdosed 3x on meth, but my heart kept beating, God only knows why--perhaps from the endless years of marathon training. didn't have abusive parents. I just was an anxious, sensitive, intelligent kid. I still have a professional job in nyc, but have held onto it while walking a razor's edge.
@@Gsp_in_NYC thanks be to God 🙏
@@rgdden2702 thanks. It’s a pretty unique experience approaching death +\- 100 times lying on the floor of my apt’s kitchen. I don’t know why I’m alive my heart should have stopped and I was too stupid to call 9/11. I rolled the dice and lived.
You need the strength to help others. Yet by it, able be next
Trauma of living with an alcoholic is real
I would love to take my son to see him. He is so traumatized after bullying that drove him to psychosis. I would pay whatever, money isn’t a problem and my son’s life has no price. But I can’t find him anywhere to book an appointment. Does anyone knows how I can find him?
Your son may be dissociating, not psychotic. Please go to ISST-D website and start exploring this.
Google him and you will find his clinic. I believe it is in Oregon
Amazing interview
Since January of this year now getting help cus?
I think this is a great topic for debate. I do agree that trauma is the root of most mental illnesses. But I also believe, that trauma is innate and inherent in human system. There's a sense of victimization that's conveyed in this conversation that doesn't feel right. You can't remove suffering from the human experience. There is a balance between empathy, and reality that just seems lost in Paul's POV.
I just wrote a comment here about the victim culture. Personally I think if someone has to tell you you are traumatized and it comes as a great shock, then . . . .? Trauma is the buzz word in our culture and overusing it like this is helping what? Helping sell books.
Shame might be the reason that stops progress for the interviewee but not for many other people
Agreed: for example the narcissist fears shame or being exposed. But once they do, they move on with supply that is unaware of their past. Meanwhile the narcissist’s victim is forced to somehow put the pieces of their life back together
Never talked about is people who feel shame and guilt and trauma due to their *own* bad actions. We are living in a victim culture. Who is even left to be blamed when everyone is a victim? None of the people who ever did me wrong lost a minute of sleep over it. Most of them did do a lot of self talk about how it wasn't really their fault because they have an "excuse" which is the next major thread in our culture, you're inevitable victim-hood then excuses your own bad behavior.
What is empowering and what is crippling? When are excuses helpful and when are they misused and abused?
Another thing not talked about here is that non-objective diagnoses can easily destroy lives and it happens all the time and pinning someone with the stigma of a mental health problem is a burden and a barrier to care within the medical system. As soon as your new cardiologist sees you carry a diagnosis of trauma, believe me, it will change how they deal with you. You may think you are a victim and will get pity from the world but you're waving a red flag to everyone. Not fair, not reasonable. But, I"m just sayin' . . .
I do know that trauma would affect a potential child years later. Maybe it's residual stress + epigenetics.... I missed the part about how to actually break the cycle tho
and what is very odd is that doctors call consuming marijuana a "recreational drug"...instead of a symptom of trauma...self medicating.
Hospitals will just straight up tell you they don't have anyone that's good with trauma. And if you try to go anyway it just becomes obvious that they're right. They don't.
Skilled trauma therapists will try hard to help clients stay out of an inpatient setting unless absolutely necessary. But not every therapist is skilled at treating trauma disorders, and they may work for programs that have rigid rules. Or they fear being sued. Or all three. Do not expect a hospital to do much more than prevent you from committing suicide while you are there. That is about it.
Peter was wonderful going depth by asking meaningful and interesting questions but i was very disappointed by Dr.Conti because he didn't give one straight and clear answer to what Peter's meant and i find that frustrating because i wasted 2 hours waiting for him to get to the point where we can use tools for shame and trauma and all he was doing just nagging and answering important questions with shallow , vague and irrelevant answers.
Agreed. I enjoyed the talk but it lacked anything practical.
Same here , was a waste of time , usually i enjoy Peter's content but this time his Guest presented unfortunately bad and trivial information, i couldn't benefit from it at all. I felt all he wanted just to promote his book not providing a beneficial information.
I'm scdal and feel so hopeless.
There a line as well
Soil sounds?
Sitting w others
Past trauma survivor possibly
Dont be ridiculous Peter many doctors go into medicine for many other reasons than "helping" others
If i can have a dollar for time he says ‘right’ id be millionaire. He needs to go to taskmaster’s and NLP class. Really hard to follow him….right! 😜
😵💫🤯
Pres Donald Trump and his alcoholic brother who died are an example of coming from the same early environment and having different results. Donald won't touch alcohol after seeing his brother's suffering. He has the survivor rationality. They both grew up with heavy stress under their authoritarian father, one got broken.
Oh, Donalds Trump is broken.
Boost.
Have you ever thought of interviewing Teal Swan? She will blow your mind. Thank you for this conversation.
Miller Carol Rodriguez Ronald Perez Anthony
Our med are at risk as well
Astray, and players of clients?
Unaddressed military and ignored
Levels of
Great conversation. And I wonder if Paul realizes how often he says "right", listening to that is a little traumatizing in itself.
@Christina Monique Yes, and when you notice you can't not notice, it's extreme and gets in the way. Still good content though
It's simply an expression, there's nothing wrong with it, and it's not traumatizing. You may need to practice ignoring it and focus on learning instead.
Broken indeed
Try to use others for gain
How dare they to setup
Detached treatment possibly
Even sleeping lab
Trauma is trauma. Ptsd is not being able to file it in the past...where it belongs.
Not to play, not diagnosis of expert as layperson.
❤
unaddressed Family
Citations not your free
He talks in circles. Doesn't get to specifics medically and what part of the brain is affected etc
Specifics.
I recently got hit car and etc
Throw my dress after suffering as child
Not a believer on the top
*"If you want to leave a happy life tie it to a goal, not to people or objects"* ~ Albert Einstein
_Nevertheless investment are stepping stones to achieving your goals_ ✅
@Christopher McLaughlin I had a bad experience investing on my own until I met Mr. Charles R Schwab, I have made over $400,000 Trading cryptocurrency, I even made a whooping $28000 on my last trade with a capital of $3000.
I also trade with Mr Charles Schwab, and i must say he makes money making seem a whole lot easier right now I'm a single parent and i pay the bills comfortably since i met Charles Schwab, he's absolutely amazing and I'd recommend him for any novice in crypto.
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The Health Care Systems in America (which is Corporate Medicine) isn't really inteterested in 'Helping People' b/c just like Chris Rock said, 'Their Ain't no MONEY in the cure'... And, 'how a drug dealer makes his money, is on the COME BACK'... And, IF a person is considered a 'Liability' in society and the Health 'care' can't make any money off of their 'clients' Euthanasia awaits in secret Eugenics oriented Amerika (now)...
Amerika is a real $hithole (now) and the Health 'Care' system is the number one reason why this country is so $hitty & miserable (now)...
Experiment
Sugarcoated
The term you used far too many times ‘committed suicide’ - my good God. Please. Stop. It’s archaic and triggering for those of us who have lost loved ones to suicide. The better terminology is ‘died by suicide’. It’s traumatizing to me to hear you rattle off commit s-...commit s....commits.
If I share the reason for my son’s tragic passing, my word choice is that my beautiful forever 21 year old son tragically took his own precious life. Not the clinical cold and stigmatizing he ‘committed s’.
Please consider how powerful and hurtful that term is and please change your word choice. Thank you for your consideration.