Why you should not bring your authentic self to work | Jodi-Ann Burey | TEDxSeattle
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 25 ธ.ค. 2020
- In this 2020 TEDxSeattle talk, Jodi-Ann Burey explores the nuances of what professionals of color and other underrepresented groups face when they are told to “bring your authentic self to work.” Many who do so may face backlash when navigating company cultures designed around white privilege, exposing themselves to penalties for not conforming to the dominant culture. Burey calls for people of color and other underrepresented people to focus their energies on realizing their own imaginations for racial justice on their terms. Separately, Burey outlines steps toward achieving more equitable and just workplaces, and implores company leadership and people with privilege to accept accountability for changing their cultures.
2:49 - “Professionalism” as code for white cultural norms and standards
6:44 - How authenticity masks the need for systemic change
9:30 - Shares how gaslighting works to deny the realities of people of color at work
11:34 - Explains the work people of color have to do to mask themselves at work
12:54 - A call to action for people of color to create their own spaces for authenticity
13:19 - A call for those with power and privilege to take on the work of changing workplace culture
More to explore:
Learn more about Jodi-Ann Burey: jodiannburey.com/
Listen to Jodi-Ann Burey’s podcast on health and race, Black Cancer: www.blackcancer.co/
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Check out Janet Stovall’s TED Talk, “How to get serious about diversity and inclusion in the workplace”:
www.ted.com/talks/janet_stova... As an avid speaker, writer, and equity advocate, Jodi-Ann Burey is on a mission to disrupt “business as usual.” Her goal is to achieve social change through the lens of historically underrepresented communities, their experiences, and the systemic intersections that address inequities.
Burey holds a cautious optimism for our future. She explains that “as a Black woman in America, it is always better to be born in the future. There is no place in the past that was better for Black people. I would always want to be born in the future. Though, a portal has been opened to make racial justice and equity possible. There is no promise of that, but it feels good to be in the moment now, when things are shifting.”
Burey prides herself on being a cool auntie, a twist-out queen, cancer survivor, adventurer, and reluctant dog owner. She’s currently working on her first book and podcast called Black Cancer, which explores stories about women of color and healthcare. This talk was given at a TEDx event using the TED conference format but independently organized by a local community. Learn more at www.ted.com/tedx
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"Easier to be who you are when who you are is all around you". Wow. This hits hard. Thank you, Jodi-Ann Burey!
Its an agenda all around is that's for sure
Yeah I felt that for sure when she said it
Culture, social ties, history. They've always been a target. Slaves were deprived of their native languages, their culture, just like natives were. Just assimiliate, let's all get along as long as you act, sound, and think like me. I'll let you be my lil sidekick, then you can learn how to be a winner, like me!
As someone with autism, I feel this. They say that they’re open, but they always tell me I’m not quite doing enough. Funnily enough since working from home, they think my attitude has improved considerably. Sidenote; I haven’t changed at all, they just don’t see the social communication issues that come with my autism anymore 😤🤦♀️
We think differently than neurotypical people do, so they usually won't understand us. 🤷🏾♀️
Completely agree... They like it when I'm able to more easily spot mistakes and details than my coworkers, but as soon as I need a quieter environment or I'm not as good as my coworkers with customers, I'm now an inconvenience.
I believe you.
Same here I’m in a male dominated industry as well and I have just stopped talk to any of them outside of work topics it’s not worth the struggle that come along
I am also autistic. I prefer to use the adjective form because saying “a person with autism” is like saying “a person with heterosexuality” - it sounds strange and inaccurate to me. Nevertheless, I understand where you're coming from. Every time I stop masking at work, I become “problematic,” and eventually, I'm forced to quit. So, in my experience, all this talk about cherishing diversity is just a talk. Once people realize that accommodating differences might inconvenience them, they're like, “sure, be yourself, but not like that”.
This is so true... I’m a straight white female and I experienced this at uni. The program leader asked us to write a strength and weakness test. Being honest I told him everything about me that lead to months of constant harassment, bullying, and down right abuse from him. He destroyed my reputation and almost destroyed me. Never be honest about yourself, I learned that the hard way.
I’m so sorry you’ve been bullied and abused in a university setting - a place that should be safe.
@@solitairedoll Thank you for your kind words, unfortunately, bullies are everywhere.
Be honest with yourself but don't share that honesty with those who don't deserve it. And alot of the time we need to even keep it to ourselves. I hope you're stronger after this and know that those who harm others will face justice sooner or later.
@@stand4justice4867 People always say what doesn't kill you only makes you stronger... that's not true... this guy broke my spirit and belief in myself and I never got it back.
Im sorry u been made to feel that way, But as hard as it can be sometimes never be afraid to be who you are and never let how someone else sees you be how you see yourself unless its a beautiful mysterious wonderful being that you are and remember smile there winning if they made you have a bad day we win when we stay in a good mood and enjoy life regardless of how miserable people love company
Thanks for this great talk! It's so true. When I stopped treating co-workers like friends, my life got so much simpler and less stressful!
"Our bodies are wanted in the room but not our voices"....
that part
@@monarado2118 hey tax advisor. How does it feel to do work every day that no one will see, care about or that really will change nothing in any particular way? I guess that’s why you have to search out TH-cam comment sections on videos that make you feel better about harassing random people of color (on the internet). But it’s ok. This is your opportunity to change. You can start by rewatching the video, taking notes, thinking about all the ways what you just said has probably made OP feel disempowered in her own career, and then go make amends by mentoring a woman of color at your workplace who might need guidance in advancing her career. If you think that’s a waste of time, I really have nothing more to say to you. Good luck living life. I hope it’s not a miserable one, though your comment (perhaps like your life?) was pretty miserable to start off.
@@HCalibSimmons1 LOL. It feels good to rent space in your mind for free. Feels very very good.
@@monarado2118 I’m guessing you removed your comment for a reason. I guess you narcissists have to narc, best of luck filling that cup /s
That's correct!
"We cannot compete in a costume contest, without a costume, and expect to win."
"It's your party, you need to do the work" - that's a really helpful analogy/call to action.
"Just be yourself" means: Lower your defenses so we can effortlessly exploit you. 😂
You got that right Peggy
Absolutely true. No wonder why rates of depression and anxiety are skyrocketing. This isn't sustainable.
Exactly!
Exactly. Happened to me this year. Exploited my weaknesses to refuse me a promotion. Never again. I learned my lesson. I'm still young so I'll know better in the future.
@@msanna4 Here's the challenge: Once you obtain a position of power, the temptation to exploit for the benefit of 'the company' gets very strong. (I think you see the trap). 😉 Best to you
I am a current African American female doctoral candidate for a PhD in Public Policy. My dissertation is on workplace democracy, intersectionality, and African American female workers. This she speaks of is not "all in someone's head" kind of lived experiences, rather this is an empirically backed long-standing phenomenon. Thank you for this video. Peace! (in my authentic self way; which I prefer, and many in my culture, instead of simply saying "Goodbye" 😉)
"You do the work to make it safe for me to come in my full authentic self"
"It is your job not mine....It is your party not mine" .
Listening to this speech before it is released and over and over again, gives me goosebumps every time. It fully articulates my experience and thoughts of being in corporate and the switch in approach required for any real change to happen.
However, it is my fundamental human right to be authentic -- I don't see why I need permission from anyone else for being this way.
Whew!! This really shook me and finally gave me words to describe the feedback that my boss gave me. When she told me that "I should ask more questions, and sometimes pretend that I don't know the answer so I can make other people feel included" she was Darvo'ing me. I nnow have a new tool to combat this. So good!
"Constricted norms of how I should express myself!" I totally relate to this! I have a neuroatypical mind and people always expect me to be small and fit into their box. I'm done with that! I will always speak up for myself and for those around me. I'm in it with you! Let's transform the world!
It is easier to say that to do it. I have got fired more times than I can count, but when the challenge is really big they all ask for my help.
They love to use the benefits of our unique brains without paying the price for it, which is acceptance, tolerance, and accommodation.
Just think about it... Someone's paying you $ to do X, Y, Z... n. Job descriptions are vague and open-ended, always leaving room for the worker/employee to go further and do more. Why? Obviously, so the company benefits the most and sucks every ounce of blood out of each $1 earned.
Just make sure you're aware of why you're there and never be 100% loyal to a company or cause, bc chances are they will stab you in the back if something goes awry or budgeting doesn't balance out.
Be professional, be courteous, be assertive, and never be complacent.
I've seen people who's college education and work experiences equate to being a general or slightly specialized secretary of some sort, yet they have gotten thrown into situations where they were told to manage emergencies that really required full blown security/police/medical/government proffessionals. Things like seeing someone who started out as a secretary and ends up being the secretary, handling PR, and doing the departments years financial budgets and all manner of ad hoc work just doesnt suprise me any more. If you let people talk you into doing the work of 4 employees, they will do it. Small or big companies.
“Come as you are as long as it makes our marketing material look good”
BS, I’m a Flavor Chemist. Agreeing to releasing a product that is already a failure would always come back to me. Not marketing, not sales, not qc,, not applications but me and me only. Acceptance of your own roles and responsibilities is being authentic
So true.
Is that becasue we need diveristy of skin colour for the sake of it
@@ceejay1794 Cool, that sounds like an intriguing job. I've always had an adept sense of smell, so I'm very attuned to flavors, and I love when there are new ones to try. Although I don't think I'd be good at predicting which ones would be popular, that would be tricky.
Hey. . . Why are some scent volatiles so difficult to duplicate outside nature? The simulated flavors can be tasty but they often taste very different from their natural state (for instance, a fresh coconut compared to coconut flavor)?
Or pine!! Literally no "pine scent" has ever smelled like a freshly-cut Christmas tree.
While it may be okay to bring your authentic self to work, or anywhere else, I think it is very rare for any of us to bring our whole self anywhere. The audience is too important. Our bosses, our colleagues, our clients. I worked with clients for years who would have fired me immediately if I brought my whole self. So I was as authentic as I could be. And no more.
Only now, no longer working with clients can I allow my whole self to flourish unimpeded...no wait, here's my mother-in-law. Never mind.
An organization must earn the right to ask people to bring their full authentic self. Trust, in all it’s forms, is a result, not an expectation.
So true. I brought a similar subject up as feedback in evalution at uni. As students of entrepreneurship our very first exam about 1-2 month in was to do a full analysis of our strengths and weaknesses plus our career plan in detail. As an authentic person I did but handed in at 3rd attempt as I struggled so long to do it as it felt so intimidating to me to tell so personal and serious information to a stranger, and wanted to get it right if doing so. And then topped off by getting judged and getting a grade...Fast forward.. I told him this in the evaluation of the classes, and suggested the classes/exam were put later in the course of the study. He replied in an angry tone " well we are not gonna change it just because you want it". I could have hoped for a reply " oh, interesting.. we will take this perspective into consideration. Thanks for your feedback".
Loved this talk. For so many years I felt like couldn't truly speak up in the work "arena" because of everything you named. The funny thing is that if most companies valued people bringing their full authentic, passionate, creative selves to work, the company would actually make more MONEY. I've learned as an entrepreneur that when I was able to play all out in my business my energy was super high and clients were drawn to me. Had I been allowed to be this person in the corporate world, those companies would have really gotten the best of me.
LOL! I've been with the same Fortune 500 company for over 20 yrs. It's a very common rookie mistake for new employees to try to espouse the proclaimed corporate values that have been dictated to them . Don't be so easily fooled - you have to learn to read between the lines. What they want is for you to "Fit In or F-Off".
Although this is indeed a common problem, it is, nevertheless, a big mistake for a company to post a set of values on the wall that they have no intention to live up to. I’ve experienced this myself and it leads to a lot of great people leaving the organization over time.
@@roberttschaefer 100% true.
@Tomas Muir great leaders never ask others to “fit in” but rather, they model the way, and by merit and integrity, people choose to follow.
@@roberttschaefer Hmm... that's still a system based on a "selection" model, something it seems to me to have in common with the "fit in" principle. The difference would be that great leaders leave the choice to others to follow the system they propose if these people feel a sense of compatibility, and choose to do so by their own free will.
But then again, people choose to try to "fit in" by their own will too, maybe for distinct reasons, but there's still the question "will you fit in or not, will you be "appropriate" enough or not"... Idk, just thoughts.
@@Ice.muffin - the “difference” you describe is not a trivial one. Furthermore, an organization is defined by its shared culture, values, and mission. If you don’t agree with what the organization stands for, then it is best for you to not join it. Also, keep in mind that innovative, creative, and even maverick behavior can also be a core value of how an organization operates. The boundaries of behavior function as an agreement, if not formally then informally. Without this commonality, then “organization” is not even possible. We can think of an organization as similar to a living organism (a corpus, a body). The systems of the organism need to function with synchronization, equilibrium, and within certain limits and tolerance boundaries for the organism to stay alive. An organization is a type of “social organism” in that respect. It’s fine for people to deviate up to a point (in fact, it’s even healthy and necessary!) but press things too far and the system breaks.
DARVO is so real. I’m glad to have another name for it. Thank you.
Hear hear hear...
Once you experience Corporate America you understand everything she says. If you're not part of the group then everyone is against you and will make your life miserable to the point you want to quit every second of the day.
Dude, I am a cis white male and its no different for me.
So do in other places.
Same things happened but in other costumes.
I work by muysalf, I get out, fught get the fuud and come back to my tower
If every time you get a job and you see that is corporate America is the problem it is you that is the problem.
It's the same for anyone who goes against the tide, that's not just a race thing. I've had to put up with that my whole life, but thank goodness I didn't have race to blame it on because the confirmation bias would have kept me in a perpetual and unproductive "woe is me" cycle where the problem is always "somebody else".
I brought my authentic self to work and they fired her.
same
I brought my authentic self to work and they kept me in a position that I vocally told them diminished my mental health until I quit while reminding me they wish more of their employees were like me.
Me too but it turned out to be a good thing. Within days of being fired, I was sleeping through the night for the first time in years, my back pain went away, the dark circles under my eyes began to fade, and a grapefruit-sized, hard as a rock fibroid I've had shrunk down to the size of a golf ball. Sometimes it does enlarge again but when it does it is pliable. Other times I can't fill it at all. They liked me being authentic outside of the office but they got big mad when I tried to bring diversity and inclusion into the office.
I know all about that
Me too! And i was brought on because i had the “intangible skills” that cannot be taught. Those same skills got me fired for asking them not to roll their eyes when I asked questions. 😤
Idk how people can memorize these entire speeches. Mind boggling.
True, but something tells me they don't just entirely memorize them, they *feel* them, the main ideas, the essence of their speech, they simply carry that within them and that's what lets them reproduce those ideas so naturally, feeling them.
Hey - it’s me - This was memorized! :)
And it took 4 weeks to learn and practice
@@jodiann_burey Great speech! My boyfriend has come home telling me about experiences at work very similar to yours. I sent him this video and he said he totally relates!
@@jodiann_burey Bitter truth... Appreciate your courage to spill it out 🔥
“Professionalism” definition at 3:06 (A+)
I love this talk. Jodi-Ann's storytelling, her examples, the power of her words... it gives me so much to think about. Can't wait to share this far and wide.
As a POC who had worked in a predominantly white work environment I completely understand what she’s talking about.
I also experienced the same as a white person in a work environment which is predominantly African (I live in South Africa). It isn't a one sided thing.
I'm tri-racial and I'm never in the majority, but I'm not going to let other people steal my self-esteem.🤷🏾♀️
@@ArnoSnyman007 What compelled you to say "it isn't a one-sided thing?". Was someone arguing otherwise? It is also important to note that this is situated in America where those who identify as white still represent the majority and much of the power and opportunities are centralized around white-identified individuals (especially males). That does not invalidate situations where the racial dynamics shift - though let's be real that it is much more common at a global scale for historically colonized races, and historically mistreated genders/sexualities.
@@zxyatiywariii8 as a some familiar with the lived experience of multiraciality, you may also appreciate the ability to be a chameleon in cultural environments. That carries inherent privileges. For one, like being able to authentically communicate in varying cultural norms (including those cultures that historically have held power over other cultures). This has been the case for centuries. Biracial individuals owned slaves and even commanded armies in the Napoleonic era. That's dope about your self-esteem; everyone else must be fragile or lazy to you because you're incapable of empathizing right?
I think that we have forgotten how diverse and individualized authenticity truly is. We should not confuse stereotypes with a person's true character. Moreover, society, in most cases, is a victim of its own making. We still have a long way to go before we become a community instead of a system.
💚
I can totally relate and I am a white woman.
To bring your authentic self anywhere is for the most not welcomed (and shown in very coverted ways) because one s independence and self reliance means to most that they can t control you.
This is beyond the existing racial is issues , this is a humanity problem at large
"They want our bodies in the room but not us".. that hit home.
The same company will say they value diversity and yet want to hire/promote people who are a good "culture fit."
Literally living this. 😢I’ve been at this position for a little over a year and some how I’ve almost lost ten years of a joyous work like stories with co workers laughing genuine care from my boss all because I wanted more. However but what I did get was a dose of reality that love never lived in my working life. I am currently looking and interviewing however, I never would have thought “I” would experience this
das my cousinnnnn. 🖤
She's smart AF
I appreciate her
das my auntieeeeeeee
Your cousin is well-spoken.
I brought my authentic self to a job interview 2 weeks ago, it cost me $26 hr, damn
Getting a well paying job that requires you to deny who you are would have suffocated you. Be glad they saved you from their b.s..
@@bettyvanderhooven-schmaasc4235 thanks for the encouragement. It makes me feel better about it. Crazy I had been trying to get that job for 2 years, some things are not meant to be
@@loudtake9980 don't let an obstacle move you out the way. The obstacle IS the way. You got this bro
ThatOneGirl
This is an excellent mindset!
It keeps you positive, moving forward and grateful for what you have learned about yourself and your experience.
This what is needed as we "maneuver" the ups and downs in life!
💞💕💕💕💞
@ThatOneGirl thank you I really appreciate you taking the time out to reply! I am constantly growing and trust me I am headed in a positive direction, be blissed beloved😇😉
OMG 👏🏾This!!! 👏🏾 This has been my unfortunate experience for many years in corporate America. 🤦🏽♀️
This video comes at the perfect timing 🙏🏽
I agree totally
For me too
Love Jodi-Ann and all of her work! Grateful for this woman and glad to see her continue to succeed!
You brought it! Powerful examples and story telling. You've thrown down the gauntlet! I hope corporate leaders who shape and inform corporate culture will pick it up. They must!
Entrepreneurship seems more and more appealing.....
Even this is annoying because ur customers are going to make decisions based on your opinion
@@BauerBeauty I would say the best business is the one that doesn’t care about customer service.
Once today’s work force starts growing their own businesses. What may happen is a new golden era of work.
An ellipsis is three periods...
@@henrycollins2478 lol why
As a straight white female have experienced the same thing when being authentic. It is not exclusive to any race, gender, etc. Most workplaces require ALL us to stifle who we truly are. It said but true.
I hear you & that is so true, it's sad that you have to endure that however bias is a process of elimination with some sections of the society suffering more biases that others.
It happens more often to people who aren’t white, Sue. How are you standing up for racialized and LGBTQ+ people in your workplace? It isn’t about you.
@@solitairedoll in one breathe, you say it's not about me and in the next you demand to know what I'm doing about it. As a manager, I never cared about a person's race of gender or orientation. It was irrelevant. The question in my mind was always, can they do the job. I never saw other managers decisions based on these things either. I did see people who were required to suspend their humanity and good conscience. This is a trait common in most workplaces and it happened to all fractional groups. Your right. It's not about me, nor is it about you. It's about ALL of us. Let's focus on fixing the greater problem which affects the whole rather than bandaids for a few. The divisional focus is a distraction from the big picture.
@@solitairedoll Here in your reply we see the truth of the racial industrial grift that Woke ideology perpetuates.
Jodi-Ann ALLLL DIS!!!! Gurl you brought the WHOLE TEA POT, okurrr???
I'm sharing this video with my VP of HR at the tech company I work at. Like frfr.
Also, you did a great job in your speech explaining very clearly the problem and some solutions to get going in the right direction. Preeeeeeeeeeach!🙌🏽
See, this is why we need to defund education and make it private. I am sorry for your tech company. Once they let the Woke poison the water, everyone dies.
@@monarado2118 What scares you about this video? What risks does it pose?
I’ve never been told to bring my full authentic self to work. Is this common?
lol
Just be yourself and you will find out
Neither have I!
Yes. In the saying ''just be yourself''.
I’ve only ever been told to follow the rules in the employee handbook.
Can totally relate to all points made. Thank you for giving voice to real workplace challenges!
Beautifully executed. I was told years ago ti be my “authentic self” but the company wasn’t ready for my “authentic”. So, I too, put on my costume from 9-5. In my costume, I speak 80s pop, CMA (Country Music Awards), once a week cowboy boots wearing and “this weekend was a bore” fluently. Poetically, I adore the acronym you used in making them the victim. So instead of me you just need the body county. I see......
THIS!!!!!! This speech touched my soul. And I felt EVERYTHING my Sis was saying. Often, I look at my non-minority colleagues and the things they do, way they act, what they say etc., and just have to wonder...it must be so nice to be White. I couldn't even imagine...
And the way we are looked at after😢😢
This is a perfect description of a conversation with my mother... being disabled can be ...complicated.
Love it!! She open my eyes to something in my past careers I witness and was not my true self.
I loved this:
"Without accountability to examine these systems of bias and power, the call for authenticity fails. It fails to question who is in the room, who sits at the table and who gets to be heard. It fails to demand that we reveal the truth about how racism impacts decisions about who's in the room, who sits at that table and who gets to be heard. What many POC find, is that even when we are in the room, sitting at that table stating firmly, "I AM SPEAKING" (s/o to Kamala!), very few people are actually listening."
Yaaaaassssssss
Thanks for catching the Kamala reference!!!!!!
I had never heard about DARVO as a term before, but it's exactly how my sister has treated me all these years!
Your sister was doing you a favor.
what does DARVO stand for? i couldn't understand it fully from the video
Stop aggrandizing perceived victimhood. "We are all obliged to make some effort to withstand the emotional toll of a propaganda that pushes our buttons. Resist that toll."
~ Mark Crispin Miller
@@monarado2118 but but but... i have the emtional intelligence of a planarian worm and you're oppressing me!!!
@@HakuCell 1. Deny 2. Attack 3. Reverse the Victim with the Offender
My, my, my. The way you captured this is brilliant. Still processing. Whew!
Thank you, Ms. Burey. I see you. It is our responsibility to fix the party, the invite and everything else. You would receive my vote in the contest.
This is one of the best TedTalks I've ever seen! She is an incredible speaker.
I get it... don’t be your authentic self if you have aspirations to ascend the corporate ladder, instead lie, hide, and fake - play the politics to get what you want - because they are using your authentic self as a filter for those opportunities.
BUT
A) why would you WANT to work and ascend the corporate ladder at a place that behaves in such a way? Find a new job, or make your own, so you can have your cake and eat it too.
B) The advice is to not fight, rather to give up and enslave yourself to “the man”... I’d rather give up every opportunity I’ve had than to hide who I am. I’d rather die fighting than succeed by hiding.
Idealistic.
@@Ice.muffin I would rather be idealistic than be a victim of my situation. Without idealists, nothing would ever change... it is our belief that our ideals can be achieved that propels change toward those visions. Sure, it might take longer than our own lives to see such change come to be... that does NOT mean such things shouldn’t be pursued.
Now, her point about those in power going first is SPOT ON. This is what I do with the team I lead because I believe that fracturing who we are between work and home is one of the most unhealthy things we do to ourselves mentally.
Once you buy a home and start a family, you're forced into the system. Regular mortgage payments, people also depend on you at this point, so turning down every opportunity is no longer an option.
Starting a business and becoming self-sufficient is the best way to proceed.
@@Half-Blood_Prince I am living that now - have a house, a family, etc. yes, you have to be employed, but that is not what this is about. The opportunities here are for promotion, mentorship, etc. so I’m not saying turn down opportunities for employment, I’m saying don’t sacrifice who you are so that you can get a promotion because that just perpetuates the problem.
@@xenthuin Never said I didn't agree with what you said or that I wasn't a bit of an idealist myself😋.
The only "criticism" (in lack of a better word) that I would consider to address to you, to any self-proclaimed idealist and to myself especially, is one fact you've mentioned yourself: our ideals often prove themselves to be hardly achievable, and the bigger the ideal, the least odds are in our favour, and especially if we hope to see the fruits during our lifetime.
But then again, also like you quite poetically put it, if it truly is in one's nature, all of the above is no reason to stop us trying, you only need the resources for it, _all_ the kinds of necessary ones.
Interesting ending to your comment, one point I myself keep in mind too.
Very informative talk, thank you Jodi-Ann Burey! I've learned what DARVO is
I've done this.... Do/t do it........... DO NOT DO IT
Why not?
❤❤❤
This Ted talk has a very important message! Important for people of color, but also about people that come from other cultures than main stream standard…. What about immigrants from all over the world that have different approach, way of talk, honesty, more open conversation. It’s about LGBTQ, it’s about people with disabilities.
Unconscious bias agains most of people that are coming from DIFFERING , non mainstream backgrounds is a an important issue that needs to be approached. Otherwise the call to authenticity will continue to fail.
Thank you Jodi-Ann Burey for speaking with honesty and courage. Forever grateful.
Sis, this is gospel. Every 👏🏾 single 👏🏾 word 👏🏾!
WOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I had to take a break halfway through this video.
Real talk. Truth.
This video....she said it to the T 🙌🏽🤎✊🏽
"We stop correcting our mispronounced names". I experience this in my workplace as a non-binary person who has come out to my team and still gets misgendered
As someone whose name always gets mispronounced in new places (yes this is my name) I hear you. Often I think it's not malice, just unfamiliarity. So what I do, is either:
1. Correct mispronunciation (often it takes months) until people get used to remembering; or
2. Just let it go and know that the people in my life who love me, do pronounce my name right;
3. But I don't expect some people ever can pronounce my name; like if their native language is Mandarin, then maybe they can't.
I can't know what your work place is like, but I do know it's harder for some people to remember how to pronounce names, or to remember when someone is non-binary. Often it's not malice, just mistake. The good people will be trying, but may forget. Like when a trans friend of mine transitioned, it took a while for some people to remember she is she.
Oddly I just realized I've never complained more than once or twice at being called a different name. I always let it go. It only annoyed me when someone just say maybe changed one letter. Then I'd casually bring it up now and then. Not sure why one thing annoyed me and the other didnt.
Wow, heard all those excuses at work ....thank you for a real and vivid look at the world of work for women of color
“Professionalism - a distorted elaboration of white cultural norms and the standards that meet the comforts of those who hold the social and institutional power.” THAT.
If challenge cultural norms, why not to do it with all cultural norms? I want to be able to pick my nose and fart at work
Isn't it strange that in places like Japan where there are very few while people they still have professionalism. Absolutely crazy! Oh dang, sorry, I guess that kinda counter-acts your point.
I was homeless at one point....very grateful to be as blessed as I am these days
Though I am very young and I've not started any yet one of my biggest fear is becoming homeless and I have no food to eat and all the short experience of life I have got to know you are the first person that I got to know is escaped homelessness perhaps some more some more people are doing that I guess I don't need to fear that much after all if you can do it I can also manage doing that(althyi will try my best to not become homeless in the first place).
@@tonymartin2693 Thanks for the inspiration
@Badem Reid1111 Crypto investment is a very lucrative way of making money online
My investment in stock and crypto I really given the current increase.
Cryptocurrency is the future
I love this...my company is big on diversity of person and thought on paper, saying that they accept all, no matter your visible or non-visible conditions. Is that true though? Not on an day-to-day, manager-to-manager basis.
I am so glad that the Diversity& Inclusion Committee suggested this Ted Talk, This video is my reality! I realize that inequity exists and I will just continue to do my best on the job even if there is no equity for people of color.
I like this video but as an Asian minority I have a different approach to authenticity -- I see this as my fundamental human right which I do not need permission from anyone for. I will still be the way I am regardless of how I'm treated, how much salary I'm getting, or whether I'm going to get the promotion. This means if I were in her position, such as getting the three-line response from her manager, I would simply say "I'm not convinced and I disagree", and then discontinue the conversation. Now, the manager may be able to retaliate later or put me at disadvantage again, but I simply wouldn't care, because she herself alone is too little a figure to destroy my life.
That's why you start your own...it's easy to do folks... YOU GOT THIS
This really blew my mind. In the very beginning I didn't understand where you were going but you created that analogy so perfectly it all came together! Thank you for making this!! Thank you for also recognizing homophobia! A lot of people leave us LGBTQ+ out! Thank you!! ❤❤❤ You're an excellent writer. This speech for real has me jaw dropping. The writing is so incredible.
If you are looking for hate, it will find you. Every single time. So, stop looking for it and live your life! You will be amazed at how little you find it.
“Why you cannot be a unique individual.. it gets in the way of our plans.”
@Mario Glory you’re much more than a swimmer
@@bradbecker8982 that’s a spammer.
I am in healthcare and I see many cultures expressing themselves in the environment I work in, I work with people with muslim head-coverings with afros(as she said) and a lot of my supervisors are women and men of color....I didn’t know it wasn’t fully acceptable in other work environments...
Exactly, what you see is at your workplace the truth, this woman is speaking all lies. It is acceptable in almost all work environments, this woman is just playing the victim and trying to spread false information.
@@ooooa9046 someone having a bad experience is not the same thing as lying. This awesome experience described here can coexist with the bad experience the woman giving the TEDx talk is describing. Saying that someone is lying and spreading misinformation when they speak out about their bad experience is exactly what enables those bad experiences to continue.
@@SandraStar66 Having 1 bad experience and saying its the entire patriarchy is lying
@@SandraStar66 State the truth, you insightful person.☑️
@@SandraStar66 many gold stars for you, love💖
Omg, that was perfectly done. I can relate to everything she said. On point. ❤️ thank you!
Does this not show the dysfunctionality of the capitalist nightmare we live in?
@ThatOneGirl there are still rays of light though if you really look. i just wish more people would do so
⬆️ this!!!
@@davidoliver9551 si.
Don't worry we will be full communist soon. Lol think capitalism is a nightmare just wait 10 years when we are identical to China.
@@AllShaaaallPerish china is not communist. Its authoritarian capitalist.
If everyone was 100 percent authentic at work there would probably be more friction that people are willingly to admit.
Thank you for sharing ❤️🙌🏾
This is an awesome talk. It also relates to women in general, not just people of color.
Its also relates to LGBT+ group
Agree Polly, strong women in general deal with this too. Ultimately anyone outside of the company box gets a bullseye on their back. Conform or go elsewhere. 😔
@@MrJakeDice yeah the speaker mentions that. Agree 💯 I think Polly was adding women in general to the list(which were not mentioned).
She also says this in the talk
Well done. Thank you for this.
Must watch talk by Jodi-Ann Burey!!!
It's called human resource for a reason. As an employee in a standard company you are not more than a replacable resource... It's a general systematic issue everywhere, independent of additional discrimination issues.
Yep, all this "be yourself, but just not like too different" ubiquitous bulshitting...
These words are powerful and totally relatable. Thank you JodiAnne for lending your voice. What does it take to win in your contest?
Great talk. Thank you
Yeah, my authentic self busts out in Kenny Rogers ballads on the regular. Not very popular with the coworkers.
Bahahaaahahaahha
Underrated comment 🤣
*drops mic* I felt every word of this talk. This was powerful and true.
My full authentic self wears pj's and a month-old neck beard. Aaaaaand that is why I am self employed.
An amazingly touching talk!!!!! Thank you!
Thank you!
I needed to hear this 7 years ago.
Me 8yrs ago, im now scarred
The best time to hear this was 7 years ago, the second best time was today.
@@carolkovacs7634 now is just a confirmation of what I've learned the hard way. But is nice to have it.
This is a refreshing take on authenticity!
What if your authentic-self has borderline?
Oh wait, I can always go full chameleon ofcourse.
*Copy-pasting identity of co-workers intensifies*
Borderline what? Personality disorder? I think you just described the speaker and everyone who agrees with her. My advice? None. Get it from a psychologist.
@@kayakMike1000 huh, no I was referring to myself, my authentic-self to be precise. I described myself, someone with borderline.
I am unclear of what you are trying to tell me🤔
Could you explain again please?
Absolutely love this
Very informative and insightful! DARVO is something I will look out for. Thank you!
Yes, look out for it like the destructive mind virus that it is. Then, fortitude yourself against it in every way.
Oh, Lord. I came here hoping to find a profound viewpoint, and I find another “me me me” “us vs. them” ego-trip. Love is universal, otherwise it’s not love, it’s something else.
This is a powerful ted talk! Thank you!
Being my authentic self made me an awesome worker with no opportunity to grow in that company 🤷🏾♀️
Powerful! Thanks for sharing!
Now, 'steel man' why she's wrong. If you can do that, then you fully understand her position.
We have (all) to stop restricting ourselves and other people. There is so much fear of change and so much fear of what is different from everything that seems to make everything going already "well" (not at all), "the rules". The rules where made to be broken, a little beat at least, what is in our hands.
“IT IS MUCH EASIER TO BE WHO YOU ARE, WHEN YOU ARE IS ALL AROUND YOU”
THIS.
Amazing talk. Thank you for this.
A Rose in the garden fares better than a fish out of water, so they say: hey fish be a rose only don't be so rosy.
And you can always go work somewhere else. That is, if you actually have any skills that are of value.
Awesome job, Jodi-Ann!
My brother has a saying about the work place “we Disagree with WHAT is said & Object to HOW it’s said in real-time ” (In another words we disagree with content, but we object in real time to misbehavior) as a way to do conflict well. And no matter what level someone is at in the company these rules still apply i.e. disagree with the content and object to the behavior. Though unfortunately I suspect there are few corporate cultures that empower the team members to challenge each other and object to each other in real time rather than gossiping behind each other‘s back‘s
This is so relatable.
Said Burey, "Society is reaching a tipping point...bigotry finding fewer places to cower" and "those of you with the protections of whiteness, need to be change agents" (paraphrase)" - this is a sermon...the pastor is Jodi-Ann Bury...and the church said AMEN!
Amen!
Its called dying inside.
I thought that was depression.
This is more like a Walking Death.
Your employer is not your problem. You are your problem.