The Best Way to Handle a Flare
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 14 ต.ค. 2024
- The Best Way to Handle a Flare
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My to go phrase is “I know exactly what this is! It’s definitely TMS!” This really resets my anxiety.
Exactly! For me this phrase works also fantastic.
Really appreciate your videos dan. Ive found that i still get overwhelmed more easily than i would like, but the key is to not ruminate in the pain/anxiety. I can lay down to catch my breath, but once i feel okay it doesnt help to keep laying there, it helps to get up and do something productive. Im able to do a little more each day, and even when i have a setback it doesnt last as long as before
Fibro here. I’m in that place where the symptoms keep changing rapidly. had I not known this was part of the process and actually me getting better, I’d probably have ended my life. Please forgive me but it’s def the case. I’ve never had so many changes and movement in symptoms EVER! Changes daily now. It’s hard not to think I’m falling apart but now I know better. Hope this helps some folks.
How’s it going now? ❤
My first (and so far, only) flare up was a great little case study in how my actions and tendencies can initiate fear. I was choosing to impose an unnecessary dietary restriction and unknowingly created some fear and anxiety for myself. Thankfully, my husband saw it very clearly. He gently helped me to see it for myself. In less than one day, the pain flare dipped right back down. This was a humbling experience for me. I learned that I have to be more kind to myself. I also learned that I often don’t see myself clearly. In a way, I am kinda grateful for that situation!
Self imposed pressure is one of the big signs of danger. Great insight you now have. Wonderful.
Smart husband 😆sending lots of love ❤️😘😘😘
@@Moonless6491 thank you for sharing that! I listened to a podcast w Nicole Sachs about how these types of behavior patterns (research/restriction) can keep symptoms up and/or induce fear that causes new symptoms or a flare.
Added bonus: I love food, so I am glad to have quickly returned to my personal preferences.
Nice to “meet you”!
@@Moonless6491 nice to meet you 😘
You have had one flare? Omg. I have 100 + flares ! Probably more like 1000. Every day, every other day...constantly in a flare every time I move my body or do any activity. It is so incredibly hard.
Thank you for sharing your experience. My flare ups come in the same frequency as before, BUT after I stopped freaking out, the flares last only 1-2 days! That’s a huge progress for me 👍😊
Thanks for sharing! That's awesome and proof of these concepts.
❤️
I noticed the same thing
“But as for you, you meant evil against me, but God meant it for good, in order to bring it about as it is this day, to save many people alive” Genesis 50:20. Thank you Dan…you are a gift. You’ve turned your pain for good for many many others. Beautiful.
Wow Dan, you just told my story.Spasms are very alarming, I know my fear keeps them coming. Im learning to navigate them better and I feel im going in the right direction. Thank you for sharing about your experience it helped me a lot.
You can do it!
Oh Dan. What a harrowing story. But makes your recovery all the more powerful and encouraging to us lot xx
I just had a lower back spasm today. I was hanging from my pullup bar today because I was feeling stiff. Back spasm right when I got off. Havent had a flare up in years. Unfortunately I did panic and here I am watching this to get myself to chill.
Flare up here too! First one in months. Big time panic attack and trying to get myself together. Hope your flare up was a short one!
THIS IS SO HELPFUL ESPECIALLY YOUR PERSONAL EXPERIENCE, THANKS FOR SHARING
Glad it was helpful!
Dan is the best sending you love ❤️😘
Love this Dan. The rare times you’ve shared a TMS memory from your past is really impactful. It reinforces that you truly get what everyone is going through. Great stuff 👍🏻
Thanks Nicole.
having a flare, & its always you I come to.
Best way to handle it: th-cam.com/video/HPkd_Hzw6WE/w-d-xo.html
Having a flare - so grateful to be able to come here for a pep talk ❤❤
This was a great reminder that flares don’t have to keep us in a fear loop.
Recently my daughter had a health scare, and at the same time, I was helping to move my mom to an assisted living facility.
I actually was doing so well through it all until after it was over. For me, that’s when I started to see my symptoms increase!
Everything turned out fine with both of them, but I was starting to feel overwhelmed….of course I would, it was concerning! But I did not freak out and told myself, that this was my brain creating these sensations. I might add that during these few days, my sleep patterns were not good, so being tired usually exacerbates my sensations. I’m so grateful for this knowledge because I know better now and the initial symptoms went away when I got some good sleep and I was certain they would not last.
Thanks Dan!
Everyone have a relaxing weekend and be kind to yourself 😊
Excellent proof that putting these concepts into action works. Fantastic.
Just the pep talk I needed, Dan! I had a GREAT week (SOOO thankful, and proud of myself for the hard work I’ve put in.) Yesterday the pain came back, slowly but by the night it was bad. I got my mindset right by the afternoon, but this morning I woke up with even worse pain. “Darn!” was my first reaction. I even thought about cancelling plans with friends.
But that’s what Annie of a year ago would do. I journaled myself a pep talk using some of the phrases in this video:
Staying calm is hard, but staying in chronic pain is harder! If I want to get out of this, I have to (get to) CHOOSE a different response. Calm confidence that this will end. After all, I had a great week right? On my good days, I know in my soul I WILL get better, so why can’t I know that in my soul on harder days? Nothing has changed. I am already OK!
Thanks, Dan, for helping me get my life back ❤
Awesome Annie. Little by little we learn and progress. You are doing this.
This awesome to hear in turn Annie. I am having a flare up rn after a GREAT week and now I am cool, calm, and collected (mostly 🐒)
@@AngelDGomez-vz2vz fantastic! Mindset is the only thing that matters. Keep positive in expecting you’ll return to those great/low symptom times and it WILL happen
How are you doing these days?
Hi Dan I have non stop flares ups but I won't let them ruin my day. I remain calm and go on with my day. Every time I walk past a photo of Corine (my sister) I say hi talk to her and tell her I love her❤and I am doing ok. What a win! I am starting to accept her death. Of course I miss her like crazy but I realize that she needs to see that I am doing ok and not being in tears all the time is not good for her she needs to go on where ever she is going if you understand. This morning went shopping again and for the first time in 2 years I put the garbage in the bin downstairs. Was heavy but I see it as another win. In an hour I am going for a big walk in the dunes sun is out 🌞so I am doing ok and I am ok not broken not freaked out. Thank you for this video love you Dan and everyone else sending you all a big smile and a big hug see you tomorrow 😘😘😘
Good morning! You are doing great!
@@Hinz2005 thanks my friend love you ❤
Well done Lenneke 🌸🌺🌼🌻🥰🤗
@@Lenneke8422-b3t ❤️ you too!!!
Wonderful Lenneke. So proud of you and your determination.
Beautiful morning in Islington London. I've been doing solo exposure therapy (Agoraphobia). Woke up and my hips, knees etc flaring. Plans were to visit the gym/pool. So called the tms out. 5.45am walk up the park then to the shops, then to the sports centre and into the changing area and sat & then sat for half hour by the pool until anxiety disappeared so continued through to the gym area. Eventually I am hoping to get in the pool(it's my arm disability that's causing ANXIETY but if I don't challenge it PDP will have a feast day). Your videos are proving so helpful as are other's stories of "wins'. Everyone enjoy the weekend.
Sending you courage and tons of love ❤️😘❤️😘❤️😘❤️💕
@@Lenneke8422-b3t thank you I need it x
Lots of love, PB. You are tenacious. ❤❤
Your story helped me a lot. I'm doing everything I can to avoid adding secondary fear during my current flare up. Thank you and God bless! Have a great weekend, Dan and friends! 🥳
You got this!
Hi Ava sending you loads of love and healing huggies 😘❤️😘❤️
Yes, Ava, you got this! Hugs ❤
Ava you will be well.. 🌺🥰🌸🌼
@@Lenneke8422-b3t Thank you so much, Lenneke💓! Healing huggies back atcha! 🤗💖😘
Thank you Dan, truly grateful for this. Revisiting this one today as things have got really colourful. I’m going to look for your game plan video, that sounds like such a great idea.
I’ve just found out about you, and have dealt with ME for about 8 years on and off. I’m mostly knocked out by it again at the mo, hence the research. I had just read it can be caused by the impact of traumas on the body and mind, which makes sense. I’d read about listing ALL the traumas (in my case about 20!) and that they needed dealing with, makes sense but sounds BIG and exhausting. I liked your idea that each thing may not need individually dealing with to heal, but living in an environment of perceived danger DOES need dealing with to heal. And that makes sense.
I completely get that relating to chronic pain that all symptoms may not be related to injuries/problems & to educate your brain that you are safe and there is nothing to fear, is in the case of ME etc sensible.
But I have also had a lot of back problems & agonising trapped nerves, and none of that is invented by my brain! It’s degenerative disc disease. I’m sure you’re not implying all pain is invented and means nothing, but to a newbie it sounds a bit like that? With backs, the last thing you need is to lay in bed (makes it way worse - so annoying!) but most need to get it seen by a chiropractor who looks at the mechanics of your spine and puts it all in the right place. Never bother with a dr (painkillers won’t put it back in the right place & just encourages you to not be aware of when it hurts, likely causing more damage) I have been left utterly crippled, not by my imagination but by severe disc problems that needed treatment and then the pain went.
I just feel a bit wary about you saying all back pain is just like ME symptoms. Maybe your back pain wasn’t caused by spine problems or damage to discs, but most peoples back pain is caused by structural problems and trapped nerves or damage that will not vanish if you tell yourself there is no danger. ME, Fibromyalgia, and similar are one thing (where there is no obvious cause/injury/damage) and I think definitely your idea about perceived danger is a big way forward, but it seems making the same big assumption about ALL back pain might be dangerous for some if it stops them getting seen by a chiropractor to get the structural issues they are suffering put right?
I recently had my first flare up and it was spared from something particular. Id love to know what you make of this. I recently listened to a podcast that was a cross road between alcohol addictions (which I have suffered from) and TMS both things that have plagued my life in the last few years. To hear a man called Steve Ozanich talking about where tms and addictions come from being from a place of loneliness and ultimately coming from a lch of true love for ones self. the podcast brought water to my eyes and maybe i didnt let myself go deeper into the feelings im not sure but ten minutes later my back pain reached a level i hadn't felt for months. I was supprised because the podcast made me feel touched and great to hear so why did my back pain come back?
the next day I was limping around work because it was attacking my leg and i new i had to relax my mind but work was so stresful it just kept getting worse. I came home and had a nap and then thought about all your advice and decided i had to go to gymnastics to nott let this pain win. So i entally started preparing myself and went and as I entered the gymnasium i completely forgot about the pain and only remembered it on the drive home. If I had any doubts about TMS they are now completely gone! I went from limping to high intense training in one day.
Sorry for the massive rant but i wanted to say thank you so much for the work you do and I have been passing your youtube channel on to others who suffer with TMS
xx
In the end - you did the right thing. You didn't give into the fear. As for why the podcast appears to have created the flare, you don't have to figure it out. Just jump right to safety.
Thanks Dan fear and panic 😱 is my problem! Went to my physio earlier to ensure I am ok ! Nothing but tight muscles and fascia.. She told me just relax live my life and if I feel fearful just have a glass of wine and relax..😂 needless to say no need to go back to her 😂 Thanks for telling your story 😊🙏 cuddles to Finn 🐈⬛
You got this!
Finn said Thank you. Tight muscles are from a scared brain. Safety is the solution.
th-cam.com/video/6uYXjgBqEm8/w-d-xo.html
🤗💖💖💖
Hey how are you now?
Apart from remaining calm, I would be really interested to hear a retelling of your story as to how you handle a flare up these days. Example: a flare up occurs, your back spasms, stay calm, then what….? Do you continue to move and not take yourself to bed?
Well, I don't really get big flare ups and haven't for many years. Two years ago when my mom had a stroke, I got a return of pain. Never got too intense. Why? I knew exactly what it was. Connected it to the stress with my mom. Gave the pain ZERO fear and attention and it went away in about a week. I continued with life. Running to bed is not the solution as that teaches the brain you are in danger or "hurt" yourself and need to rest/heal.
Sometimes what you’re saying reminds me about Tara Beach’s way of discussing mindfulness and also just somatic techniques where we train to feel sensation without judging it, making stories etc. Fascinating
We all have our own way to resolve the pain or symptoms, but there are commonalities across various mindbody practitioners.
@@PainFreeYou for me it’s been important to learn from different perspectives for sure, because when I hear similar ideas expressed it reinforces that a different way through pain, anxiety, and life in general is possible. It’s such a gift to learn and apply what you and many voices share ✨
I have always determined my worth by how much I could do help others. Now..I cannot! I am having to learn that I have worth in spite of what I can do..And I am learning other important things too. It is like my Body is teaching me things. This sounds crazy..but nothing else makes sense. I am now just going with the flow. 😊❤
Love that! No, it doesn't sound crazy.
@@PainFreeYou
Thank You..Dan! I always think I teach the Body..I have never thought the Body could teach me! This has been hard for me..but I am learning! You Do So Much! Thank You!
@@kathleenwharton2139 Also remember, the brain is creating all of this. Your body is fine. 🙂
@@PainFreeYou
Thank You..Dan! It really is. I have doctors and three hospital verifications! It will just not move to do certain things! It truly is strange! But I Know I am Okay! Maybe when I have learned whatever..it will move again! My grandmother had lifelong sciatica..but I think it was convenient sciatica..because it kept her from doing the things she didn’t want to do..but didn’t interfere with the things she Wanted to do! It was Strange Too!
@@kathleenwharton2139 Interesting story about your grandmother.
“Your” story is appreciated. It helps alot. I rarely have flares. Yesterday a total meltdown: my back began hurting ( i didnt hurt it) tendonitis flared! Numbness too. Better more calm this morning but yesterday an atom bomb- i know why. My focus & thoughts were very negative
Lesson learned, right Tom? Carry that lesson forward.
I’ve been there Tom! We all have. Great opportunity to teach our nervous systems that all IS well. ❤
so good to have these videos to refer to with increase in symptoms. Ty Dan
Glad to help.
Hi Dan, thanks for the messages and videos you leave on here. I’m an Ironworker and have had neck and back pain for years. I have also have a fusion in my neck, 2 rhizotomy’s surgeries on my lower back. I found this work a while back and was definitely feeling relief. I’m an Ironworker and work with heavy material all day. I have pulled my back out so many times. Less than a week ago I was lifting some steel in work, I could feel a major spasm in my back. The pain has returned and it’s pretty bad. I’ve been keeping calm, but not really sure what to do. Also, the pain in my neck comes and goes and generally feels that part of my body is permanently injured. Would love some feedback
The brain perceiving danger is what causes pain and those back spasms. I had countless of those over a 13 year period. They were never injuries. Just acute onsets of pain in response to my brain not believing bending over and lifting was safe. Decide you are not in danger. Recovery from fear is the task.
th-cam.com/video/VSmTe8zPXh0/w-d-xo.html
Great one, Dan. So personal and honest and totally relatable.
Wow so fitting for me today
Hi Toshua nice meeting you 😘
Glad to help.
This was a good one. Created huge clarity. It was a great idea describing the problem in your circumstances! That was excellent!!! You should do more of that! Superb!
Thanks Dan ❤
Brilliant video fella. Thanks.
Thank you for sharing a little part of what you went through Dan, it’s very helpful..🙏🏼
My pleasure!
I felt pretty good on the days I was away. Even the day after that really rough night of not much sleep was a good one. But then since I’ve been home I’m feeling a slight uptick in symptoms. I know it’s because I’m feeling stressed by all the house projects/things I need to do along with unpacking/laundry etc. I feel very behind because for 13 years I was severely limited. The past two years since discovering TMS I’ve starting doing more again but I’m still so behind and have so much mess/clutter in my house. I completely freaked out about everything I have going on & need to do and boom symptoms are back. How do I work on handling the every day life/ stress stuff without symptoms increasing? I know a lot of it is the pressure/perfectionism/judgement etc that just scares the heck out of my brain.
Hi Amanda you can do all this you don't need to hurt sending you much love and healing huggies ❤️😘❤️😘❤️
I'd stop telling yourself "you're behind", it's telling the brain to panic. Broken arm last May, ten months of hospital appointments and now have restricted movement in arm n hand, I'd been telling myself the same story and getting more frustrated. Now I'm trying to say "do what you can if you're in the mood" end of. Wishing you strength
Wishing you well Amanda ❤️🩹☘️ You can do this ! 🌺🥰🤗
It's not the life stuff we have to do, but our thinking about them. Self pressure seems to be such a trigger for many. Do what you can when you can. Take the pressure off yourself.
@@PainFreeYou I used to think that things wouldn’t get done if I didn’t put pressure on myself but I know the exact opposite is true. Pressure only adds to my anxiety & I spiral and nothing gets done. I’m trying to switch to a kinder inner voice and trust that the important things will get done. And that over time the window of what I can do will widen. I am already doing more but since I still have symptoms, some things will just need to wait and that’s ok!
Such a brilliant video 🙌🙌👍
Glad you think so!
My sensations flare up during a psychologist session or a Dr visit and even when I am out of there, they keep on going. It is very frustrating when you go somewhere to get help and feel like crap instead.
That is the perception of danger creating the symptoms. My fast start playlist will explain what is going on and what to do about it. DansFastStart.com
@@PainFreeYou thank you, Dan and I hope you get some much deserved rest for Christmas. Hopefully no tractor boy that day.
Excellent!
Hi Inge just thinking of you and hope you doing ok 🥰🌸🌻🌺🤗
Love you Inge💖! 🥰🪴🌻🪴🌻
Hello Dan!! During the day my sensations are very low, many times I don't have them, but as soon as I start my exercise routine my symptoms increase a lot, I don't stop my exercises because I'm not going to give fear power, but it really is very difficult, no I understand why this is happening to me, a few weeks ago I was doing my exercises without any problem.
A little bit of pain during an exercise can lead to the brain becoming more and more fearful of the activity. Do your best to EXPECT the best prior to working out. Do your best to respond calmly if the pain occurs.
Thank ypu for your exelent videos and information. Would Claire Weekes consepts for anxiety; face, accept , float and let time pass also apply here?
I love Claire Weekes work. Yes, I recommend her book often.
At first during flare ups, I was like oh no what am I gonna do now? Which made it worse.
But then after a couple of years Im like meh so what, and that usually keeps it in check most of the times but the journey is far from over…
For you bending over triggered symptoms, and for me its lifting things . Usually 10+ lbs. How do i go about working out again. Ive slowly made my way back into working part time. Driving also triggers symptoms. Thanks for the video. Currently in a flare up thats lasted about 3 days now but its fading
This video will help retrain your scared brain those things are okay.
th-cam.com/video/mRowJmW4uk0/w-d-xo.html
I lifted heavy boxes and next day got worse. It’s been a week now and no better. How do I know it’s not physical??
If the brain perceived lifting as dangerous - it can still be a mindbody thing. Delayed reaction pain is proof you did not injure yourself lifting the boxes. Injuries hurt the moment they happen. th-cam.com/video/sHvM_PNfvto/w-d-xo.html
Dan can I ask did u at the start have a normal scan/mri
I had x-rays in my early 30's. Degenerative disc disease. No other significant findings. I never got an MRI because I heard about Sarno and knew that the MRI was meaningless and any findings were NOT the cause of my pains.
Dan I need coach
11:59 Have a Game Plan for When Things Get Difficult video: th-cam.com/video/4pMVFI4MQbU/w-d-xo.html
Thanks Hinz.
Hi Dan!! Recently I had a flare up I was doing really good before going days without feeling any pain but recently my school holidays started and the pain returned I don’t know why? But I’ve been trying to clam down, and take deep breaths clam my nervous system etc. and it works the pain decreases but it’s still not gone. What should I do? Thank you 😊
This will give you some ideas. th-cam.com/video/Ez9Ez49M8Ig/w-d-xo.html
@@PainFreeYou Thanks I’ll check it out!
Boom.❤
Thanks Dan! My biggest problem is since I dealt with different symptoms for the last 7 years and the last one I manage to heal month ago. However new one started again. So my thinking process last few days went “this one as well will take forever to heal”… although I know it’s not true sometimes the panic gets the best of me. How to trust that this will heal faster than I think ? I feel like I need some perspective to hold on to regarding this since each of my symptoms took long time to heal so it’s natural for anixety to be storger than me in this segement.
Just thinking that they'll take long to go is sending the fear message loud and clear. You can get out of the loop, you've already done it. Our brains will always find something so we have to be aware n kind to ourselves. Wishing you well
This video on the symptom imperative is important.
th-cam.com/video/PTGuSyXNh8E/w-d-xo.html
And the video on handling a flare has tips for any new symptoms. Basically, don't feed the fear.
What if we have constant symptoms 24/7?
I'm back again
💛
If you need to apologize to some people for telling your story of pain on the floor, because you’re afraid they have been triggered… these people will never find their way out of TMS.
Great point. Thank you for pointing that out.
@@PainFreeYou 😘
Go to see a chiropractor, your back sounds heavily damaged, by all your work. There are so many parts of the spine, and all the nerves of your body travel through your spine to everywhere else. It’s all connected and one bit out of place can cause problems in Seemingly weird or unconnected places. As well as the pain of an agonising back if the spine is out of line, nerves being trapped or misplaced can not only cause lots of pain but can also affect how the different body systems work, so you digestion can be affected or jaw pain or hip or knee pain can be caused by the knock on effects of things being damaged or out of line in your spine.
Your back needs serious help. Please see a chiropractor, they are amazing for anyone with back problems. Back problems can be stopped/improved massively and treatment can stop them getting worse or from permanent damage being created.
I completely agree that relaxing out of perceived danger is the way forward for ME and fibromyalgia, but you cannot wish your way out of serious back problems or damaged spines/discs/nerves.
Or go and check.. if they say you’re imagining it all, that’s fine. But you’re not and not getting structural help, will likely keep you in severe pain and could cause permanent damage. I think relying on this concept for all back pain is not safe and actually could be dangerous, if other checks aren’t done too.
I’m concerned people are ignoring serious back pain and not having it properly assessed (not by a dr - they have no idea!)
See a chiropractor and be free of it! And use this for other things
This was another good one. Thanks Dan!
Thanks Larry.
Thanks Dan. I think all of us can relate to the terror and fear you felt during that 14 hours! Before I knew about TMS, I got a nerve block in my left hip. It was great for three days, but once I started back into a daily routine, boom! However, the desperation from that event became a determination to find an answer. Which led me to Dr. Sarno and Dr Schubner. I’ve been up and down in a flare for the last month, and most of the time I have remained calm, but I’ve also had my days when I’ve reached the end of my resilience. I do know without a DOUBT that I have TMS. I trust the process. “See” you tomorrow Dan. Love to you and everyone else in this blessed TH-cam community ❤
Thanks Peggy. Yes, I will be here every day. :-)
🤗💖💖💖