Citizen Soldier - If I Surrender (Official Lyric Video)

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 20 ธ.ค. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 7K

  • @Salty_Goose
    @Salty_Goose 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7276

    Sending virtual hugs to those who feel like surrendering. Tomorrow is a new day to keep fighting away those demons. You got this

    • @CitizenSoldier
      @CitizenSoldier  3 ปีที่แล้ว +806

      Sending a virtual hug back to you Sarah 💜!

    • @samuelriveraserrano
      @samuelriveraserrano 3 ปีที่แล้ว +106

      Thanks Sarah

    • @thegalacticstage9908
      @thegalacticstage9908 3 ปีที่แล้ว +106

      I thank you for the virtual hug we all need to keep fighting our own story

    • @Star_catcher
      @Star_catcher 3 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      There is no one who you have to fight. 🤔

    • @vasyuey
      @vasyuey 3 ปีที่แล้ว +31

      Pls help

  • @jayz7142
    @jayz7142 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1368

    The fact that your songs are so scarily relatable is terrifying.

  • @SpecialInterestShow
    @SpecialInterestShow 3 ปีที่แล้ว +422

    When you feel alone and broken, remember, there are people like those that make up Citizen Soldier, who understand how you feel and speak up about it like this. You aren't alone.

    • @CitizenSoldier
      @CitizenSoldier  3 ปีที่แล้ว +41

      💜

    • @user-ng3bg7qw2d
      @user-ng3bg7qw2d 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      This!

    • @michelleedgeman9683
      @michelleedgeman9683 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Yet we still feel so alone. 😢 But it's life right?

    • @user-ng3bg7qw2d
      @user-ng3bg7qw2d 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@michelleedgeman9683 You've got you, and that is what matters. Stay strong.

    • @michelleedgeman9683
      @michelleedgeman9683 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@user-ng3bg7qw2d Thank you! I'm trying 💕

  • @hannahtrevors2651
    @hannahtrevors2651 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1881

    Sometimes, NOTHING is really the problem. Sometimes, it's just the EXISTING part that hurts.

    • @What-A-Shocker350
      @What-A-Shocker350 2 ปีที่แล้ว +44

      True...very true.

    • @hannahtrevors2651
      @hannahtrevors2651 2 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      @@What-A-Shocker350 Unfortunately. I hope you are okay and it doesn't hurt too too bad. Take care

    • @What-A-Shocker350
      @What-A-Shocker350 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      @@hannahtrevors2651 Thanks, you too.

    • @hannahjoseph3515
      @hannahjoseph3515 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      100% true.

    • @hannahtrevors2651
      @hannahtrevors2651 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      @@hannahjoseph3515 I'm so sorry that existence may be a pain to you right now. I know that you can grow larger than the darkness and you will be alright. Take care

  • @noahcoulombe4125
    @noahcoulombe4125 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1893

    Citizen soldier is the only artist keeping me alive right now, the songs remind me that I'm not the only one out there feeling this shit. Thank you.

    • @clioharles1202
      @clioharles1202 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Yep

    • @Red-jq4fq
      @Red-jq4fq 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Yes

    • @thatguy3
      @thatguy3 3 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      You are not alone in your pain. You are a gift to this world. Don't let even the monsters in your head make you forget that. You are the best version of yourself always have been and always will be. Idk who you are internet stranger but just know I love you regardless of the monsters you may be facing. I love you regardless of if you feel worthy, and I love you for being you :) someone is always rooting for you whether you can see them or not.

    • @amyyyelizabethh9354
      @amyyyelizabethh9354 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Train Wreck, James Authur. Check it out.

    • @kjkblade69
      @kjkblade69 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Agreed . Life is a bitch sometimes!

  • @blacktemplarsergeantwalker9874
    @blacktemplarsergeantwalker9874 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1312

    Citizen Soldier is much more than a band, they are a group of people who write songs about what people would otherwise keep quiet about. Their music helps so many people. I'm thankful for them, and I hope they never stop making works of art #CitizenSoldierArmy

    • @CitizenSoldier
      @CitizenSoldier  3 ปีที่แล้ว +120

      🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤🖤

    • @void1011
      @void1011 3 ปีที่แล้ว +31

      Yes. I agree. Their songs helped me more than once. :)

    • @tamarack1pines
      @tamarack1pines 3 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      Citizen Soldier and NF are musicians who touch and heal souls with their real music! 😔

    • @chloefrazier6487
      @chloefrazier6487 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      @@tamarack1pines 100%

    • @leweirdwolf230
      @leweirdwolf230 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@tamarack1pines indeed

  • @accfrvwpps3680
    @accfrvwpps3680 3 ปีที่แล้ว +486

    "What's the point of holding on like this when no one seems to care if I exist"
    I'm only halfway through the song but I'm already bursting into tears.

    • @CitizenSoldier
      @CitizenSoldier  3 ปีที่แล้ว +50

      Sending love friend 🖤

    • @Julia-ik3yb
      @Julia-ik3yb 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Hugs! I know the feeling 🥺

    • @HotBanana2023
      @HotBanana2023 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      New people come into our lives every day and 1 or 2 will make you realise exactly why it was worth holding on its called hope and faith things will become better xxx

    • @rhaimamudag425
      @rhaimamudag425 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    • @ashskillen5844
      @ashskillen5844 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I barely made it to the first chorus before I was

  • @defskill9484
    @defskill9484 2 ปีที่แล้ว +503

    "So sick of hearing, I should stay when I know I would never be missed." That broke me completly 😥😭

    • @TK-uz4ts
      @TK-uz4ts 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      If you are struggling please don't hesitate to reach out to those you trst or consider seeing a therapist. You are not alone in this. Life is worth the pain we go through so stay strong. I wish you all the best

    • @thebeardeddwarfegoesnomad6370
      @thebeardeddwarfegoesnomad6370 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Unfortunately the world would be a better place if some of us weren't here including myself

    • @JohnaFactsDontCare...
      @JohnaFactsDontCare... ปีที่แล้ว +4

      If I can keep fighting so can all of you. I'm 55 and I'm still here.
      Sure, my pain would end, but the few people that really love me would inherit it, and I don't want anyone else to feel the way I do. And it would be my fault.

    • @angel1111.
      @angel1111. ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Yep I live in house with my sister's n non talk to me unless I have money

    • @robincavins3466
      @robincavins3466 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      The pain is real, but if it gets that extra please seek help. I do and I find my comfort after the right here with @Citizen Soldier

  • @8cutstrings
    @8cutstrings 3 ปีที่แล้ว +880

    Happy songs make us sad, because they remind us how much better other people have it. Sad songs make us happy, cos they remind us there are others who are like us.

    • @dianavandentillaart-kool9335
      @dianavandentillaart-kool9335 3 ปีที่แล้ว +45

      Happy songs make me sad because I want to feel happy
      Sad songs make me feel heared but even more sad because I know there are other people who suffer like me as well
      Stay strong 🌺

    • @user-ng3bg7qw2d
      @user-ng3bg7qw2d 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Truth

    • @organic.9029
      @organic.9029 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Goddamn, no wonder I barely have any happy songs in my music folder.

    • @makennafruen3929
      @makennafruen3929 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Ancient truth and hidden wisdom come from songs that share a deep and more different perspective

    • @zorrow_
      @zorrow_ 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@dianavandentillaart-kool9335 and that's why i love batte songs! (especially: only survivor - vo williams)

  • @eclipseshea5342
    @eclipseshea5342 3 ปีที่แล้ว +335

    "There is no agony like being strong when no one knows you're sick"
    That is one powerful, relatable lyric

    • @CitizenSoldier
      @CitizenSoldier  3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      💜

    • @oliviamattison1738
      @oliviamattison1738 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      That lyric hit me hard

    • @TheRealBaldEagle
      @TheRealBaldEagle หลายเดือนก่อน

      Literally no one knows, I put up such a strong exterior, no one knows how truly broken I feel. How truly broken I am.

  • @strugglewolf
    @strugglewolf 3 ปีที่แล้ว +215

    This is the type of music people gotta listen the lyrical music is fading I love seeing people fighting for it instead of doing mumble rap lyrical music is coming back and I’m glad to see that

    • @CitizenSoldier
      @CitizenSoldier  3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Thanks! 💜

    • @braxtonantkowiak6401
      @braxtonantkowiak6401 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I completely agree with what your saying

    • @strugglewolf
      @strugglewolf 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@CitizenSoldier np love the new song my favorite one gotta be if I surrender or I’m not okay

    • @strugglewolf
      @strugglewolf 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      @@braxtonantkowiak6401 I don’t wanna hear about people flexing on me with their Gucci money and girls just want the song to be from the heart and this band NF etc are the people that know what we want

    • @braxtonantkowiak6401
      @braxtonantkowiak6401 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@strugglewolf exactly

  • @violettefabrega1053
    @violettefabrega1053 2 ปีที่แล้ว +313

    « When no one seems to care if I exist. There is no agony like being strong when no one knows your sick » hits me hard.

    • @TK-uz4ts
      @TK-uz4ts 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Are you doing ok?

    • @Callmezane2010
      @Callmezane2010 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Yh and it relates to me so much is well

    • @billygreene1645
      @billygreene1645 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      ​@@TK-uz4ts to an extent i am not fully like i want to

    • @Zen_mais_en_mieux
      @Zen_mais_en_mieux 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      me too

  • @17snowflakes
    @17snowflakes 3 ปีที่แล้ว +79

    The thing I love about Citizen Soldier the most is how well they manage to put our deepest, most hurtful thoughts and emotions into songs we can still enjoy

  • @Tarot_I_XIII_XVI
    @Tarot_I_XIII_XVI 3 ปีที่แล้ว +988

    to people who don't understand the lyrics: I'm so happy for you.
    To people who understand the lyrics:
    I'm so sorry, I also understand it, I hope it'll get better

    • @CitizenSoldier
      @CitizenSoldier  3 ปีที่แล้ว +114

      Thanks for sharing that 💜

    • @NinjaGirl-in3ht
      @NinjaGirl-in3ht 3 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      I agree and yeah I understand these lyrics honestly the outside world to me is nicer than the world within school where bullies lurk within every corner and feed on those who are sensitive to words but the thing we never realize at the time is that we are never truly alone! There is always someone who will understand how we feel and understand our pain to help us get through it so for those of us who know the lyrics maybe we went through that pain to be a light in someone else's darkest days! There is always a reason for everything we go through so maybe we went through our struggles in order to help others through theirs.

    • @davidrosenberg5396
      @davidrosenberg5396 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      I understand far to well and wish I didn't.... Fuck this song brings me to my knees

    • @one_universe7937
      @one_universe7937 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @ANDREW CALHOUN at some point, you open your eyes and see the world in a new way. And then you can't get back into the box...Being human it often means becoming one. Other people, it's you, too. We're like bees, connected to each other, but forgot it :)

    • @haseda-5778
      @haseda-5778 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      it won't, but thanks for the thought

  • @kate_grey
    @kate_grey 3 ปีที่แล้ว +417

    Do they like NOT have a great, amazing, talented song? They don't? Well of course they don't because they are great🖤

  • @Rouxoi
    @Rouxoi 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +9

    Sending kisses, hugs, love and support to everyone who feels like surrendering. Every new day is worth fighting away those inner monsters. You got this! ❤

  • @lovew444
    @lovew444 3 ปีที่แล้ว +275

    And ladies and gentlemen, we have finally found the most amazing and relatable music creators.

  • @JuliaN-hl9cg
    @JuliaN-hl9cg 3 ปีที่แล้ว +180

    *"There is no agony like being strong when no one knows you're sick"*
    That hits me everytime, I hear this emotional voice

    • @gavinrabourn
      @gavinrabourn 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Timestamp is 1:33

    • @jamesharding3459
      @jamesharding3459 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      It’s a special kind of hell when you get so good at pretending everything is fine when nothing is, but you just can’t deal with it right now.

    • @angelacavon7305
      @angelacavon7305 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@jamesharding3459 IKR? 😭😭😭

  • @lyulf
    @lyulf 3 ปีที่แล้ว +880

    That last verse hit me hard. Even the times when I was in crisis, asking for help, I was dismissed, ridiculed, and treated like a joke (even by therapists). It's hard when it seems like the only time anyone takes things seriously is when you become "the dying proof." I keep fighting, but "I just wanna lose."

    • @mastrodestroyer7676
      @mastrodestroyer7676 3 ปีที่แล้ว +33

      Don't give up! Your Life Is long, you Will never know what will happen in the future! Don't listen to the people that don't help you when you are in a diffucult situation, listen to Who love you and if there Is nobody, you must go out and know other people, there will be in the world sobebody that can support you!
      P.s. don't look at the grammar, i don't know english very well

    • @brandyndudley4982
      @brandyndudley4982 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I am always here for you

    • @crystalmeia.o.p1613
      @crystalmeia.o.p1613 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Hello I just wanna remind you you are valid and that no one has to always be OK sad backwards is das and das is good its very natural to cry for we are human hope you had a great day

    • @jamescooke914
      @jamescooke914 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      thank you for not surrendering.

    • @gaylebeckstrom9288
      @gaylebeckstrom9288 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      No don't give up.
      Things have to get better

  • @ThomasGabrielWhite
    @ThomasGabrielWhite 3 ปีที่แล้ว +115

    Songs like this are better at educating people on the suffering of others than any psychology book. As someone who's struggled to understand others and at one time believed suicidal people to be weak, I appreciate the work people like you do to show people the truth about this stuff.

    • @Silthria
      @Silthria ปีที่แล้ว +10

      I used to think that suicidal people are weak because they give up, but then I found myself in a really dark place and myself had suicidal thoughts, so I changed my mind. Even simply existing with depression and other mental health disorders requires immense strength and sometimes we got to the place when it's just too much and we're too exhausted by this everyday fight with ourselves. The lyrics describe it really accurately.

    • @jordanbyrne2681
      @jordanbyrne2681 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      The lyrics resonate with so many people. The songs really do hit you in the feels even if you're not going through that pain or hardship yourself.

    • @MikaelaTufts
      @MikaelaTufts 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      I’m proud of you for learning and changing your view! I appreciate it, and the fact that you were willing to admit you were wrong means a lot. Thank you.❤️/gen /pos

  • @raxhjohn1302
    @raxhjohn1302 3 ปีที่แล้ว +67

    These guys need a award or something for best music of 2021.
    Seriously it's so underrated it fking hurts.

  • @karmatia.
    @karmatia. 3 ปีที่แล้ว +148

    oh god. that was unexpectedly deep, and hit close to home. well done, citizen soldier; i’m gonna go cry now with this on repeat.

    • @CorpseKing-sw1eq
      @CorpseKing-sw1eq 3 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      They have this caring feeling for their fans so they write songs to help us know that we aren't alone in this fight.

    • @CitizenSoldier
      @CitizenSoldier  3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Happy to hear that 💜

    • @CorpseKing-sw1eq
      @CorpseKing-sw1eq 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      @@CitizenSoldier thank you for being our voice ;

    • @mizanime7633
      @mizanime7633 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@CitizenSoldier Thank you for being our voice...your song really helped other ppl and me so...tHaNk YoU!

    • @tammyjohnson8161
      @tammyjohnson8161 หลายเดือนก่อน

      My record is at least 40 repeats crying the entire time.

  • @asteros_
    @asteros_ 3 ปีที่แล้ว +121

    Brb gonna go cry. I'm bawling. I feel undeserving of all the support I receive from my family because I know someone always has it worse and I always feel guilty for what I have, because I feel I don't have it as bad as others. I always feel like a fake, a burden. These songs help me understand myself and my thoughts better. Everyone out there, remember your meds. Drink water, and stay safe.

    • @CitizenSoldier
      @CitizenSoldier  3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Much love to you 💜

    • @thuychung8411
      @thuychung8411 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Just because there may be someone who has more pain doesn't mean yours are less. Be proud of yourself for keep going

    • @asteros_
      @asteros_ 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@CitizenSoldier thank you 💕

    • @asteros_
      @asteros_ 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@thuychung8411 thank you for your kind words, they really mean a lot. Have a great day. 🌻

    • @PurpleFlames87
      @PurpleFlames87 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I feel the same way but it’s better to admit what’s hurting you than to let it consume you and turn into something worse

  • @DeadReckoning2008
    @DeadReckoning2008 9 หลายเดือนก่อน +6

    "So sick of hearing I should stay when I know I would never be... Missed..."
    God damn... This line hits the hardest.

  • @BookOfLilacs
    @BookOfLilacs 3 ปีที่แล้ว +43

    I’m praying for you and everyone who listens to this song. I’m not really one to talk, but your life will get better and people care for you. You are important to someone out there, even if they live halfway across the world. You matter. Don’t give up.

    • @CitizenSoldier
      @CitizenSoldier  3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      💜

    • @tired.5123
      @tired.5123 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I’m sorry but I read the end part as you don’t matter. Give up 😭✋ but Thankyou for your words, I hope you are doing well too!

    • @BookOfLilacs
      @BookOfLilacs 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@tired.5123 Of course! Thank you 😊, you too!

  • @williampieters6018
    @williampieters6018 3 ปีที่แล้ว +740

    To whomever reads this
    You’re here for a reason, in both ways:
    -You were curious for this song because of the title or because of the artist
    -You’re still here because you deserve to live and be heard, this is a comment section where everyone feels you, so you just go ahead and feel you.
    They’ll be there, we’ll be here

    • @xceryxdemurstra6323
      @xceryxdemurstra6323 3 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      Yo, that's some real sh*t right there, and I appreciate you because too many people don't care anymore and can't be bothered to offer their hand to someone whose drowning.

    • @user-ng3bg7qw2d
      @user-ng3bg7qw2d 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Thank you.

    • @blacklight7029
      @blacklight7029 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      thank you, William, I appreciate it, and more importantly, I appreciate you

    • @sadboyofficial30e
      @sadboyofficial30e 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I wish

    • @user-ng3bg7qw2d
      @user-ng3bg7qw2d 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@sadboyofficial30e I'm here and I care. Some days I feel just like you. But I know good people are still out there. I just haven't appreciated that when I should have. I hope those people will forgive me one day. Until then, I carry on. Stay strong. You've got this.

  • @lauraespada1151
    @lauraespada1151 3 ปีที่แล้ว +360

    “If you could see all my abuse and spend a day inside my shoes, you’d realize why I wanna lose”
    Mom, dad, I’m not craving attention. I’m barely hanging on and I know you think mental health isn’t real. But the nights crying myself to sleep, the endless headaches, the friends I lost by pushing them away, the loneliness, this sick feeling I can’t see the end of it otherwise than ending it... It is real. And I need you to believe for me. Just this once.

    • @CitizenSoldier
      @CitizenSoldier  3 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      We know how it feels Laura 💜

    • @user-zj1wd8ty5r
      @user-zj1wd8ty5r 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Been there. It’s not always that damn phone. Stay strong, @Laura.

    • @JoeHero40k
      @JoeHero40k 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      It gets better. I didn't think I would make it. It took a long time but it did get better

    • @thelonelyninja5881
      @thelonelyninja5881 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      stay strong and i you wish all best in life and hope things get better for you in life

    • @jarheartfaith4341
      @jarheartfaith4341 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I believe you and know what you are going through I'm there myself but Jesus Christ is the Love we all are in a search for.or the reason for the emptiness in our lives.prayers for you and your family in every situation your facing in life. You will overcome by the blood of Jesus amen

  • @sethgillihan5685
    @sethgillihan5685 ปีที่แล้ว +134

    "There is no Agony like being strong with no one knows you're sick" broke me... my eyes started leaking

    • @thestrongproject
      @thestrongproject 10 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      I'm not crying, its just that sometimes, when I'm sad, water comes out of my eyes!

    • @MeowingCat835
      @MeowingCat835 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

      ​@@thestrongproject it's okay to cry, all emotions are fine

    • @MeowingCat835
      @MeowingCat835 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Hugging you all 🫂

  • @toughtiffies
    @toughtiffies 3 ปีที่แล้ว +450

    My husband died by suicide 11/09/2020 and I've been struggling to forgive him. Thank you for this song, even as painful as it is. I love you Nic Shelton. I always will.

    • @sweetsavage5563
      @sweetsavage5563 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Hey I just read your post by chance I love this band they are so relatable its unreal. I didn't loose someone to suicide but I have been where you are ina different story. I feel your pain as I read. I'm so sorry from your loss...your are not alone by your pain or your thoughts. There is always someone who would listen . I don't know you but you can talk to me I'd you ever need . I feel alone all the time my world is crumbling everyday and I struggle to find hope to see how can I get through this. I'm a woman who feels ...lost. completely n utterly hopeless. Never give up someone always cares

    • @user-zj1wd8ty5r
      @user-zj1wd8ty5r 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Your a strong woman. Soon, you’ll meet your husband in heaven! 😇

    • @ARC-0606
      @ARC-0606 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      I'm so sorry for your loss...I wish I could have saved your husband despite never knowing him I love writing poetry and it tends to be darker poetry whether it's inspired by a song or something that's deep inside as I tend to find it hard telling someone face to face about how I feel. Especially when my dad says that it's because I don't pray enough or I don't trust God enough or I don't read the bible enough not to mention a "friend" told me I was choosing to have depression and I need to snap out of it. Poetry and writing is the only place I can go to tell how I'm feeling and I have my poems on my blog, my quotev and wattpad accounts. People have told me they have felt the same pain of it. That it touched them deeply. I wish my poems could have reached him. Again I'm so sorry for your loss and I wish I could give you a hug.

    • @user-zj1wd8ty5r
      @user-zj1wd8ty5r 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@ARC-0606 VIRTUAL HUGG! ༼ つ ◕◡◕ ༽つ

    • @UnknownPerson-nl7te
      @UnknownPerson-nl7te 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      You should never do anything without knowing the possible outcomes

  • @saavikofvulcan6887
    @saavikofvulcan6887 3 ปีที่แล้ว +237

    Idk how TH-cam does it..... Last night, I was in a really bad place. I broke down and was looking for a way out. This came on my recommended this morning. to anyone who needs to hear it, I love you. You are worth saving. You have made it through 100% of your worst days and you are not alone. Things will get better

    • @Asia.V_Vibes
      @Asia.V_Vibes 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      That's God he knows what we need

    • @myagirl1997
      @myagirl1997 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I think God did it buddy, I was going through the same thing, and then I chose to live just like you even though it was hard, I was feeling so unloved, and The next day as I was going about my day someone I thought I knew added me on snapchat, I added him back. And right now that’s a reminder that God has my plans, He has yours too, and to me it sounds like this song was part of it, nothing is impossible for God and that includes even random things, Sorry for preaching this was the only way I knew how to respond

    • @OzziesLittleFroggie
      @OzziesLittleFroggie 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@myagirl1997 Don’t apologize God has saved me countless times from turning off the lights and it’s encouraging to read comments like yours

    • @h.o.p.e9195
      @h.o.p.e9195 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      th-cam.com/video/BPHQWzIA0no/w-d-xo.html

    • @TanjaGekko
      @TanjaGekko 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Thank you ❤️

  • @buddietaz1397
    @buddietaz1397 3 ปีที่แล้ว +130

    I just want to say that having “You’re not praying enough.” in the speech bubble is so good. My family’s religion has only been a point of making me feel not enough so I’m so happy to see that other people have felt the same.

    • @amberanime
      @amberanime 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I take you mean praying not paying. though for sure money related problems play a huge part in suicide as well. Not only selfesteem issues. Some people feel good about themselves, but dont have the means to thrive in a competitive money focused world and they opt out because living is just to expensive or being forced into working is whats causing the depression, not your thoughts about yourself. The amount of people I know who feel their quality of life would improve if they could LIVE their lifes instead of being forced to go to their jobs 5 days a week is really telling. And the amount of people who feel trapped in a system they feel is sick or doesnt work and thats what pushed them to suicide attempts or thoughts.. like no amount of ''your amazing and worth it'' pep talks are going to help here because this group is already aware of that. Their problem is with how the world works, not themselves. This side of suicide gets ignored to often and almost always put on the person instead of the system. Like the person was Ill or needed help. No this person needed a healthy working world. The system kills people as much if not more then mental disorders do. Add to that that most self esteem issues are ALSO because of the system.. and well.. time to change the system instead of tackling the problem on an individual bases. Unless the system changes, suicide will not only stay, the numbers will keep on growing. Praying and theraphy will both fail. They do already. The problem is bigger then anything that can be resolved with talking to somebody.

    • @buddietaz1397
      @buddietaz1397 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@amberanime you’re right. Whoops. It’s praying now.

    • @Xaforn
      @Xaforn 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Been told that many times. Or compared to other people who have it worse yet they’re thriving. I don’t care about those other people, they aren’t me!

  • @Zigthrill
    @Zigthrill 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +13

    "If you could see under my skin, You'd realize why I hold it in. Why it's a fight I don't wanna win." Those lyrics cut deep.....

  • @adamdaman6784
    @adamdaman6784 3 ปีที่แล้ว +236

    “What’s the point of holding onto this?”
    Because it will get better, I swear to you. You’ll get through.

    • @CitizenSoldier
      @CitizenSoldier  3 ปีที่แล้ว +30

      Well said 💜

    • @shafireman700
      @shafireman700 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Heh, if you think about it.. There are so many people that are suffering and yet can only be understood because of the pain others as well have gone through. Banding together is the only way to survive, but as hard as it is to find others.. It's worth a try.

    • @HeReS_JoHnNy-qc6vy
      @HeReS_JoHnNy-qc6vy 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Often, my inner demons like to drag me into the Depths of my own sanity. Its like mentally drowning, but they keep giving you air to survive. Deeper and deeper I go, and the pressure keeps getter more intense. I don't know if I've hit rock bottom, but I'm slowly climbing out of this.

    • @natekillian6425
      @natekillian6425 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Normally, I'd agree, except I've been going through it for 10 years now. And everyday is only worse than the previous.

    • @Valkirth
      @Valkirth 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      amen,besides no sailor was ever made by sailing through calm waters.

  • @kennedyrose7155
    @kennedyrose7155 3 ปีที่แล้ว +259

    “Will anyone believe the hell of being me” is the lyric that hits home for me bc it’s hard to believe that me, a person who pretends to be happy, is struggling mentally.

    • @alexbroadway29
      @alexbroadway29 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Hey your just like me. I pretend to be happy at school, but I’m actually struggle with severe depression and am starting to have more suicidal thoughts.

    • @17snowflakes
      @17snowflakes 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@alexbroadway29 Same here 😔

    • @alexbroadway29
      @alexbroadway29 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @Angela I know don’t you hate it! And then people end up making you feel guilty for feeling so bad even though you don’t even really know why you feel this way and you don’t even want to!

    • @Cheetahgirl_Studios
      @Cheetahgirl_Studios 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      I hear you. Every time I try to say how I feel I just get shut down. At this point I don’t even bother.

    • @alexbroadway29
      @alexbroadway29 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      @@Cheetahgirl_Studios listen we’re all exactly in the same boat. So I am proposing a free invitation for anyone who is depressed or just having emotional problems to come talk to me. People say I’m very good with emotions I’m also very calm, kind and none-judgmental so anyone can come talk to me if you feel like no one else will listen to you because I 100% will!😊😊❤️💜💖💙💛🤍

  • @kattymythos
    @kattymythos 3 ปีที่แล้ว +57

    ,,just let me die” as a person that was suffering from depression until now that one hits really hard. Thank you for being voice for all of us❤️ Your songs always feel like they say what I could never describe with words. So thank you again. Stay safe everyone

  • @iDukessa
    @iDukessa 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Hearing this after overcoming depression for years really hits different. It brings back the memory, the breakdowns, the madness. Some people won't understand how it felt, because they never experienced the feeling of not having any choice but to endure and this pushes you to the edge where you don't have any choice but to end everything. But something inside my heart, the little hope of being saved by someone is always there. Fighting while waiting for that moment where I can say that I'm finally free. Monstrous mind can really kill. But your kind words and action can make difference.

  • @braxtonantkowiak6401
    @braxtonantkowiak6401 3 ปีที่แล้ว +237

    It's 12:59 am but a new Citizen Soldier song is more important

    • @CitizenSoldier
      @CitizenSoldier  3 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      Haha thanks! 💜

    • @garyeslicjk4112
      @garyeslicjk4112 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Indeed

    • @braxtonantkowiak6401
      @braxtonantkowiak6401 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      @@CitizenSoldier I was just scrolling through Spotify and I got a notification and when I saw it said Citizen Soldier I clicked immediately

    • @reyluisrodriguez6758
      @reyluisrodriguez6758 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Here in Cuba is 1:11 am. I feel the same.

    • @dyingicecream2785
      @dyingicecream2785 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@reyluisrodriguez6758 Same hour than you, but I am in Canada.

  • @SzalonaOlaaa
    @SzalonaOlaaa 3 ปีที่แล้ว +213

    I am suicidal and suffer from depression and I have to say this song is nothing but amazing.

    • @CitizenSoldier
      @CitizenSoldier  3 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      Much love to you Riza 💜

    • @SzalonaOlaaa
      @SzalonaOlaaa 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      @Nurain Nabilah Nazri Keep fighting, you're not alone.

    • @MIke_Storyteller
      @MIke_Storyteller 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      Yeah.. Me too, I suffer from a lot of fake friends and not loyal friend even my best friend gone and he doesnt care about me anymore.

    • @Only_-_Yours
      @Only_-_Yours 3 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      May God heal your heart and give you the strength to keep fighting ... I know it feels like hell .. but you are all too special to die ...
      You are sensitive fragile souls, angelic and full of emotions and perfection seekers ..
      And you are true warriors to bear all this .. you are a living proof of patience and strength ..
      Love yourselves because you are worthy of all love ♥️

    • @ebordann3825
      @ebordann3825 3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      You are Loved❤️. We'll get this through. Much Love.

  • @faithlife8244
    @faithlife8244 3 ปีที่แล้ว +110

    Even if you don't think anybody cares I know there are people like me who still cares about all of you out there! ❤️✨ Thank you all for being here you're all amazing! ^^

    • @CitizenSoldier
      @CitizenSoldier  3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Thank you friend! Appreciate you 🖤

    • @faithlife8244
      @faithlife8244 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@CitizenSoldier No problem! I also appreciate you, your music is very helpful to many of us!

    • @Dragonphil223
      @Dragonphil223 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Your right there faith their music has helped me so much

    • @blackcat-ps2ro
      @blackcat-ps2ro 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      This song speaks to me ive been feeling this for 4 days counting today

    • @LcHamilton710
      @LcHamilton710 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Sadly, for people like me, those words fall hollow. There's knowing THERE'S people out there like you, and actually KNOWING people like you. It's the lack of the latter that hurts the most. It's the knowing we are no one important that drives our thoughts to suicide. I won't be here to see any response, but wish you all well. Anyone who sees this, stay strong for as long as you can. Don't be like me. Don't let them win.

  • @CelestialGamingLounge
    @CelestialGamingLounge 2 ปีที่แล้ว +22

    I'm a survivor, for all those who feel low just know you are much more stronger then you realize and you have a whole family backing you up no matter if their physically with you or over the internet stay strong! 🙏🕊️

  • @RmX161
    @RmX161 3 ปีที่แล้ว +406

    This is for the ones who need this.
    My dearest friend, my sweetest love, my once never ending story, my darling stranger, i have something to tell you.
    You are loved more than you could ever know, if not be the people around then by me.
    You are so special in every single way, such a beautiful person, on the outside and in spirit, i thank you for being you and being here.
    Even if the darkness rises to the point you can’t help yourself by wishing you could give up but please don’t!
    I love you, i need you and i miss you!
    Never give up so i can hold you again, even if it’s just once.
    So wipe your tears and let those beautiful eyes shine again, you deserve it.
    Untill we meet my dearest friend, my sweetest love, my once never ending story, my darling stranger.

    • @CROWficial
      @CROWficial 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Thank you. Just thank you.

    • @scrunchy222724
      @scrunchy222724 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      😭

    • @Boyviete06
      @Boyviete06 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      Hug me now. You've convinced me

    • @autumn6587
      @autumn6587 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      "Let me fall, let me break."

    • @autumn6587
      @autumn6587 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Thanks but no thanks :)

  • @Beeleezbulb
    @Beeleezbulb 3 ปีที่แล้ว +81

    I'm glad this song came out, at the right time. Im not anxious anymore. Wish me luck tommorow! ✌ And never give up

  • @dylantamasi792
    @dylantamasi792 3 ปีที่แล้ว +118

    If you are reading this your are valid and you are loved. Your not alone in your fight. Dont give up!

    • @ranidiangelo939
      @ranidiangelo939 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      I am alone

    • @ravenclawallday6213
      @ravenclawallday6213 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Thank you, this comment is helpful. This support is what people need, and you're giving it. Thank you

  • @ellamarie-MakeJesusKnown
    @ellamarie-MakeJesusKnown 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Surrendering to the “monsters inside” will not fix the hurt. True peace comes when we surrender our everything to God. It is only then that we can experience healing.

  • @Marselin_lcr
    @Marselin_lcr 3 ปีที่แล้ว +21

    Wow. Just...wow. I never cry listening to musics or watching movies. But this one touched me, and I can't explain why, I don't have depression, anxiety, nothing. It looks like the person who wrote this has put their feelings, their soul. What a song, this is a masterpiece.

    • @shafireman700
      @shafireman700 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      It really is, knowing you listen to this and understand.. Shows you probably care quite a bit of the pain people go through. I wouldn't be surprised if you even have helped or are helping others.

    • @Marselin_lcr
      @Marselin_lcr 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@shafireman700 and now I'm felling a good person haha

    • @shafireman700
      @shafireman700 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@Marselin_lcrYou very well are a good person. Keep pressing on and DON'T unlock the full potentional of your emotions. 1 person deserves another so, pff idk what I'm typing I should probably get to sleep. This is what happens when Citizen Soldier releases a song plus me being in a social mood. ;

    • @CitizenSoldier
      @CitizenSoldier  3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Much love 🖤

    • @Marselin_lcr
      @Marselin_lcr 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@shafireman700 once I tried to help someone with this kind of problem. But she used that against me... and I think I still care. I don't like to remember this, but every time I listen to this kind of song she comes to my head, again and again. After this I don't help anyone with problems like this, I just say things like "It's ok, everything will be fine". Sorry saying this here, but I had to blurt it out...

  • @Paradoxical_Vault
    @Paradoxical_Vault 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    I..haven't related to a song like this in my entire life. I..cant voice how hard this hit me and how much of a relief it was to hear my heart come out without having to say a word. Thank you..please continue doing your best, and to anyone reading this..dont give in, because strength isn't physical or by wealth..its holding on to go further and overcome what's holding you down

    • @CitizenSoldier
      @CitizenSoldier  3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      💜

    • @williampieters6018
      @williampieters6018 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Hey, get back to this comment whenever you feel bad for a bit and then read what you just said. And keep reading it till you find something and there’s always something to get you out of a bad mood so don’t give up on finding either, just don’t forget that you don’t always have to search but just to do

  • @toxicreaper6915
    @toxicreaper6915 3 ปีที่แล้ว +559

    I once surrenderd and kicked the chair out under myself,my best friend who i had a fight with over a girl came to my house and saw me through the window hanging,he broke my door down and saved my life and then he just grabed me and gave me the biggest hug ever and said to me you matter,i broke into tears and for 7 years now we are stil best friends

    • @dianavandentillaart-kool9335
      @dianavandentillaart-kool9335 3 ปีที่แล้ว +60

      Hold on to your friend because he is a true friend 😉

    • @marcpatterson6280
      @marcpatterson6280 3 ปีที่แล้ว +34

      I'm glad you are still here

    • @thelonelyninja5881
      @thelonelyninja5881 3 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      i am glad you still here

    • @toxicreaper6915
      @toxicreaper6915 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      @T H well if it helps in a way,i wil tell you that you matter aswell and i belive in you and your dream to be successful one day

    • @dianavandentillaart-kool9335
      @dianavandentillaart-kool9335 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      @T H you are just as important as anyone else
      If I could I would reach you a hand and say you are not alone, let me help carry your weight and make it a little bit lighter for you
      I hope you will be succesfull in good things in life, but I hope you don't succeed in taking your own life because you are important
      Stay strong, share some of your hurt, there will always be someone who hears your cries 🖤

  • @amandabates2218
    @amandabates2218 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    “So sick of hearing I should stay when I know I would never be missed” why is this verse so relatable ?😭

    • @TK-uz4ts
      @TK-uz4ts 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      If you are struggling don't hesitate to reach out to those you trust or consider seeing a therapist. You are not alone in this. I wish you all the best

  • @Mvan09
    @Mvan09 3 ปีที่แล้ว +31

    This song is making me cry because everything I have bottled up in the past weeks is being said through the song. I cant stop the tears. I just wished my family saw the real me and don't judge me for being sick. Also, I love, love the song. 💜

    • @CitizenSoldier
      @CitizenSoldier  3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Sending love 🖤

    • @faithhopelove7777777
      @faithhopelove7777777 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Jesus sees you & loves you the way you are but he can heal you if you ask & believe!

    • @DragonBlade98
      @DragonBlade98 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Don't worry you can make it through this no matter what happens you can always over come the hardships in life. No matter what people may say there are always those who love you and care for you, keep going strong and never give up as I know you can make it through anything

  • @soldiermom7352
    @soldiermom7352 3 ปีที่แล้ว +30

    I told my son when he left for Iraq that I would always be there for him no matter what. Mental or physical . He came back and we are even closer. He knew I meant what I said and as long as I breathe I will be here for him and he knows that. I only wish every military person had someone but not all do. So we need to help those who don't. God bless all.

    • @Xaforn
      @Xaforn 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      I’m glad your son has you, I was an army wife and my husband changed when he came home, he wasn’t the young man I’d known since we were kids anymore. He became cruel and abusive. He left us and moved on, I’ve forgiven him but I wish and pray that he finds help for his inner demons, he drinks and consumes far too much.

    • @soldiermom7352
      @soldiermom7352 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Xaforn I am sorry to hear that. I am glad you could forgive . I hope all is well with you now.

    • @Persis144
      @Persis144 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      My brother in law served in Iraq in 2003. He came home and never spoke once of what he experienced. Slowly, he broke under the stone wheel of PTSD, and nobody saw how far gone he was until it was too late. He died by suicide just last month. RIP, Brother. We were too late.

    • @soldiermom7352
      @soldiermom7352 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Persis144 I am so sorry about your brother in law. You are so right that sometimes there are no outward warnings . Once again so sorry for your loss . Even though my son appears fine who really knows but him.

    • @SpexMusic
      @SpexMusic 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@Persis144 Daangggggggg

  • @abubakrbedda5410
    @abubakrbedda5410 3 ปีที่แล้ว +250

    When everyone is depressed but you just like the song.

    • @CitizenSoldier
      @CitizenSoldier  3 ปีที่แล้ว +37

      💜

    • @user-zj1wd8ty5r
      @user-zj1wd8ty5r 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      Your right about the song being nice.

    • @Cotton_Cloud4792
      @Cotton_Cloud4792 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@user-zj1wd8ty5r its far from being nice its an explanation of a feeling that no one understands but you no one can see how it would be to be in that position its not just a nice tune

    • @amberanime
      @amberanime 3 ปีที่แล้ว +30

      @@Cotton_Cloud4792 Technicaly this is not true. People with high empathy (or empaths) can in fact understand feelings and positions they have never been in. Some people have this ability, but it's hard for somebody that is not an empath or with a strong sense of empathy to understand or relate that this is possible. It is true for most people that only experience makes you understand. But it just isn't true for all people alive. Some people can and do see/understand what something can/does feel like in a certain position of mindset. To a point that some empaths have committed suicide because of troubles not even their own but the pain and stress they feel is just as real. So yeah..just throwing that out there. Empaths and people with strong empathy can see and understand these things. Even withoud having lived it. It's really sad people still seem unaware or uncaring or unbelieving of the emotional range and emotional intelligence some people posses in this world. And how thats not being dramatic or attention calling or lying or being a ''senstive (like thats a bad thing) snowflake.

    • @ryanrosa9273
      @ryanrosa9273 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@amberanime actually no one in this world can truly understand another person bc everyone experiences and deals with pain differently and even with empathy u get an idea of the feeling end of story even to people who have experience the same scenario can’t understand one another they can relate yea but again pain works differently for everyone

  • @demonicninja9094
    @demonicninja9094 2 ปีที่แล้ว +115

    These songs help a lot I'm a 23-year-old who's never had a job because of how bad my depression and anxiety is and these songs show me I'm not alone

    • @TK-uz4ts
      @TK-uz4ts 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      If you are struggling please don't hesitate to reach out to those you trust or consider seeing a therapist. You are not alone in this. Life is worth the pain we go through so stay strong. I wish you the best

    • @sabrinabritain4998
      @sabrinabritain4998 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I'm 20 (as of Thanksgiving the year 2022) and I am battered and broken and though I've had jobs I've held them for less and less time and now I can't get a job and so I'm struggling with everything. It's to the point I'm barely managing to keep my head above water. It's horrible, but I'm hoping it'll get better, as much as I doubt it. Good luck in your lifelong adventure...
      (I am seeing multiple mental health professionals to anyone who may come by and recommend therapy. And yes. I have tried transferring to new ones.)

    • @soulsingingsongsofpraise1122
      @soulsingingsongsofpraise1122 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I found this song while looking for I Surrender All by Citizens. Just thought I'd let you know in case you wanted to give that song a listen as well. 😊 💛

    • @Waza313
      @Waza313 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Now, lad, it has been a year. You are 24 now! From the bottom of my heart, I hope you are doing better ❤

    • @knockout8157
      @knockout8157 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Can’t say that I’m quite in the situation you are(or at least we’re at the time of writing this), but I feel you there. There are a lot of reasons that I don’t really like to think about what my future will be, but this is one of the worst ones. I get good grades, I take advanced classes, but none of that will matter if I can’t pull myself together enough to seem confident enough to get someone to hire me. I am horrible with people. I’m always nervous about what is the “right” thing to say, and it’s easier with people I know, but for an interview or something… I would be stuttering like mad, pausing to think, and stopping my sentence just to reword something like ten times a minute.
      Well, I’m done with my rant now. I just want to end by telling you this: I am not alone, and neither are you. We have each other, and all of the other wonderful people who commented on this video. Thank you for reading.

  • @moonshine3345
    @moonshine3345 3 ปีที่แล้ว +31

    Thank you guys, awesome as always! Everyone who can relate to this, always remember - there is always a person who cares, there is always a person that will listen and there is always a person that will help you get through your darkest moments! Hold your head high and believe in yourself! Song is amazing, keep it up guys, you are the best!

  • @Edu_Gamer-cu8tx
    @Edu_Gamer-cu8tx 3 ปีที่แล้ว +80

    Citizen Soldier and their 2:00 AM bangers dude
    Match made in heaven

  • @norannor435
    @norannor435 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    " If i surrender to the monsters in me, will it set me free " 🥺
    I feel like the lyrics just touched my soul 🖤

  • @shermeil1987
    @shermeil1987 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    I don't know who needs to hear this but Psalm 91 says,even if everything around you gets destroyed,even when life itself seems hopeless and all for not,you'll keep standing, for Jesus died for us carrying and already having payed for are sins,with his own flesh and blood you'll make it 🙏🏾

    • @sandman2345
      @sandman2345 20 วันที่ผ่านมา

      That doesn’t feel like any consolation right now

  • @neurospicyplus
    @neurospicyplus 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    This song made me tear up. People feel this way every day and most people don't see. And then they claim the individual is faking it and just fuel their depression. It's so awful. Thank you for tackling these issues in your songs, I'm sure it's touched many people and will continue to. 😊

  • @sarthakgoyal2562
    @sarthakgoyal2562 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    The way this song hits you, each line making you feel the agony, it is just so painfully beautiful and soothing.

  • @laurah200
    @laurah200 3 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    you guys never dissapoint, i love the fact you bring awareness to mental health. These songs are perfection.

  • @curtismiller89
    @curtismiller89 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    In my past, I was always a volcano ready to explode on any little thing that triggered the rage I had bottled up for 7 years from 8-15 when I was child abused by my birth mom and her boyfriend that I was scared of letting it go cause I felt that if I let it go, who was I? I felt that I would've been nothing but a burden...until one night Jesus Christ saved me and told me to let it go, he said I'm here for you and I will bear your hurts, your pain, and your rage and hate just let it go. And since then it has been 9 years since then and when I hear songs like this, it makes me appreciate how precious life is, and how we loose sight that every human being has a purpose here on earth as the children of God who made us in his own image that we are born to make a life here on earth that He has graciously giving us that we are to bring glory to him and his name by our choices in life. Glory to God Almighty. Hallelujah x10.

  • @Velocitron
    @Velocitron 3 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    How many times have I watched this? How many times did I come back to this? How many times did I repeat this? Too many times to count. I relate to this song. I may not show to my family, I do feel depressed just hide it. Thank you for making this.

  • @Lupus_119
    @Lupus_119 3 ปีที่แล้ว +768

    I know that no one asked for this, but here goes.
    When I was a young teen, I started to feel like I was nothing but a disappointment to my parents. I was so convinced that what I felt was true, that I decided to drive a steak knife through my heart. But, before I could do what I felt had to be done, I had what I can only describe as a vision of my parents finding me after I had gone. I stopped and told them how I was feeling and what I had almost done; they were devastated. After that day, I swore to hold on for them, and to never let them see me like that again. And here I am, nearly a decade later, feeling the weight of my oath every single day; wanting nothing more than to surrender.
    Thank you, Citizen Soldier for giving a voice to my pain, and the pain of so many others.

    • @lill_sweets3271
      @lill_sweets3271 3 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      Send you a Hug... ❤️(っ.❛ ᴗ ❛.)っ..

    • @Lupus_119
      @Lupus_119 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      @@lill_sweets3271 Thank you.

    • @lill_sweets3271
      @lill_sweets3271 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      @@Lupus_119 Your Welcome...❤️

    • @acapellafellow4956
      @acapellafellow4956 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      @Gemmariah Beadle you're not wrong to feel that way.. but please don't do something like that sweetheart.. hang in there, and don't listen to the mean Evil voices ok? You are not worthless! You are an amazing beautiful person! Who has so much potential! I Know that you'll be Amazing more than you already are❤️😊

    • @acapellafellow4956
      @acapellafellow4956 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      I'm so sorry.. plz Know that you are a very wonderful amazing person! I'm sorry that the pain you're feeling... I'm sending you a virtual Hug 😊 hand in there it'll get better ok? ❤️😊

  • @sssnake4148
    @sssnake4148 3 ปีที่แล้ว +28

    I will never understand how these guys always pop up when I need them most. Thos song hits a different way, and in all honesty the last week has been utter hell for me mentally and emotionally. Thank you guys. Please keep doing what you're doing

  • @skyfry6917
    @skyfry6917 2 ปีที่แล้ว +55

    I’m almost 13, and I’ve been through slot of abuse through my life, mental and a few times physically. I’ve been struggling with being suicidal for a few years my mom has fully convinced me that I shouldn’t be here so that’s great. But this song I listen to occasionally just to let my emotions out. I don’t do it much but sometimes I just need to. Thank you.

    • @TK-uz4ts
      @TK-uz4ts 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      I'm sorry for what you've been through. If you are struggling please don't hesitate to reach out to those you trust or consider seeing a therapist. You are not alone in this. Life is worth the pain we go through so stay strong. I wish you the best

    • @rachaelmccord4657
      @rachaelmccord4657 ปีที่แล้ว

      You are going to have a long beautiful life ahead of you. No matter what please remember that you are loved by so many people, though you may never see us face to face.

    • @virginiagwen6523
      @virginiagwen6523 ปีที่แล้ว

      I hope you're doing ok. It's very relatable, because the first time I was suicidal was when I was 11, and now as an adult, things doesn't seem much better. Nevertheless, just want to let you know that you are not alone, something I wished I had heard from someone when I was your age.

    • @RJelly-fi6hd
      @RJelly-fi6hd ปีที่แล้ว

      Hope you are doing better.

    • @okoteiru2952
      @okoteiru2952 7 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Are you still there¿??.... Don't be defeated by the world.... Carry on.. you will find the treasure you seek ... .. .. . . Search for your purpose. People hurt you but it's the people that can cure you as well. Find them. Or they will come to you on their own. Just hang on .

  • @GhostSloth
    @GhostSloth 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Waking up and feeling down, but listening to a song made from across the world suddenly makes it better. Every single song makes me feel heard, and I hope everyone who listen to these songs feels the same.

  • @blackbirdleleOvO
    @blackbirdleleOvO 3 ปีที่แล้ว +103

    Simple...
    I see Citizen Soldier
    I click

  • @gilangromadhon7028
    @gilangromadhon7028 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    "when no one seems to care if i exist"
    man that's deep and related.
    great job guys this is amazing song

    • @CitizenSoldier
      @CitizenSoldier  3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Thank you friend. I care that you exist. Glad you’re here 🖤

  • @nesrine2623
    @nesrine2623 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    All the songs of Citizen Soldier are rich, rich in emotions. But this one... This one is extremely powerful. The music of the chorus and the lyrics are magnificent, powerful, and show the distress of an existence. It is in listening to Citizen Soldier that I reflect every day on the meaning of life. Of this fight. I have a thought for depressed people who "can’t take living with what’s in their head".
    I am sending you strength, hope and love. Those who rarely feel pain will never know what it’s like to experience it all the time
    If you have listened to this music, it is because you are survivors!

  • @kynacornils8640
    @kynacornils8640 3 ปีที่แล้ว +143

    "Will anyone believe the hell of being me before I decide to be the dying proof."
    That hits hard.

    • @sherryannforde2457
      @sherryannforde2457 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Yes it does. You can live without living and die without dying that's it ...

    • @xxblackbird15xx
      @xxblackbird15xx ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Its true. I ask myself that question every day

    • @vancofgaming4038
      @vancofgaming4038 ปีที่แล้ว

      This line perfectly describes my inner thoughts. I'm deciding to commit suicide to give proof to society of the demotivation society throws at us.

    • @elliea5088
      @elliea5088 ปีที่แล้ว

      definitely I know it's horrible horrible but sometimes I've wanted to prove it do you believe how sick I am now 😞
      how are you doing? has things gotten better at all 💙 hope you're doing okay and still here fighting I am but I'm tired 😞

    • @MegaNinjamonkey
      @MegaNinjamonkey ปีที่แล้ว +1

      It does and unfortunately I’m having thoughts of becoming that dying proof…

  • @evelynstenberg
    @evelynstenberg 3 ปีที่แล้ว +31

    beautiful song. I have a new friend who I realized was suicidal so ive been as supportive as possible and its taken a while but he's finally said he's feeling a lot better. I'm not the only reason he's okay but I refused to sit back and see him stuck in that darkness and not do anything. I'm so happy he's doing even a little better.

    • @CitizenSoldier
      @CitizenSoldier  3 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Glad to hear he’s doing better. Appreciate you Evelyn 💜

    • @spicypringle5272
      @spicypringle5272 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Your lucky you still have your friend, I recently figured out my friend committed suicide which hurt so much. make sure you don’t let go of your friends.

  • @blamethewolf
    @blamethewolf 3 ปีที่แล้ว +45

    Some days it's really hard not to surrender when you know that the suffering will stop if you do. Some people will (luckily) never understand what it's like to fight with yourself every day just to make it till the next day. When you don't know what living feels like anymore and are just existing.

  • @MaeganKelley-m7j
    @MaeganKelley-m7j หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Bro, you need prayer dude, God I ask you to forgive and heal this guy and replase his depression with hope and happiness lord.
    YOUR FORGIVEN!!

  • @sairiakemi3280
    @sairiakemi3280 3 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    Dang, all of their songs are life stories of different people and they share all of those emotions in the music, which is what makes it amazing. Music is something I'm connected to emotionally and it helps me with all my problems. Music like this is meaningful to manny people not just me. Thank you so much for your music. It helps many people with what they are going through and let's you know you're not alone. I'm extremely grateful for your music and a lot of other people are too. Keep lighting a hope in everyone's heart and help them through the power of music! 💜💜💜

  • @musamumtaz9764
    @musamumtaz9764 3 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    You guys are probably the only reason i am still fighting. Citizen Solider understand me more then anyone ever has. This is why i am so connected to them. You guys deserve all the success you can get.

  • @TrayXCooper
    @TrayXCooper 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    This is why I love this band.
    This band writes songs that explain what tons of people don't know how to explain themselves
    I love songs like this.
    These lyrics are so real and raw and express the dark feelings alot of people have but are afraid to let out

  • @efehr5919
    @efehr5919 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Idk if any of you are Christians but being a believer is the only reason I'm still here fighting. There's always something to be thankful for n positive about even tho ur mind tells u otherwise

    • @TK-uz4ts
      @TK-uz4ts 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Stay strong, god is with you so you dont need to fear anything

    • @rondartmich6000
      @rondartmich6000 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@TK-uz4ts ❤

    • @rondartmich6000
      @rondartmich6000 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@TK-uz4ts ❤

  • @Atty333
    @Atty333 3 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    To anyone reading this, I appreciate you, I care about you, I love you even if I don't know you 💗 stay strong and things will be better. And thank you citizen soldier for the amazing songs! You've helped me get through the toughest year of my life ❤ keep it up with the great songs!

  • @aiden6106
    @aiden6106 3 ปีที่แล้ว +83

    I think the scariest part about depression. Especially clinical depression. Is that its scarier when you don't have a reason to be feeling down. A lot of times its some sort of external force that may be able to be combatted. But when its a chemical imbalance. It's terrifying when you physically can not explain why you wanna do harm to yourself.

    • @mikaelacash3791
      @mikaelacash3791 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      So true. I have a thyroid condition, and everyone who has thyroid issues knows just how much it ban mess you up mentally if your numbers are off. Just recently, my hormones were so imbalanced that I was basically texting the crisis textline every other day and legitimately thought I was gonna die before the medication change kicked in because I was so suicidal. When you have a chemical imbalance, you don't even need a reason to be depressed. It's all your body messing with your brain and telling you to be sad when really you shouldn't be.

    • @marcuswanha9723
      @marcuswanha9723 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Or the times you may not want to harm yourself but just cease existing. Just that you have no drive for anything. Even the things that you normally find fun and enjoy now just leave you feeling numb.

    • @mikaelacash3791
      @mikaelacash3791 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@marcuswanha9723 So true. I know that feeling way too well.

  • @ade684
    @ade684 3 ปีที่แล้ว +66

    It's crazy how Citizen Soldier's songs are so relatable and understand my feelings better than people who know me the most do. You're a reason I'm trying not to lose the fight with depression, Thank you!❤ I'm sure your songs are a voice for many of us

  • @moxie_kat
    @moxie_kat ปีที่แล้ว +15

    I know I’m late to the comments, but I just want to tell anyone out there who’s struggling that you are not alone. I scrolled through many of the comments and nearly every single one was from a person who lives this song every day. I’m no exception; a little over a year ago I tried to throw it all away because I couldn’t see a future I wanted to live in. I thought that ending it would set me free, but it’s not that black and white. My sister saved my life, and my friends proved that they cared that I existed. So I’m repeating what I learned now, so that anyone who needs to see it knows.
    You are not alone.
    You are not broken.
    You are loved. And if anyone in your life is fool enough to tell you that you’re not, then they’re wrong. You are deserving of love.
    Your feelings are not a burden.
    You are not worthless.
    You deserve to live. Not just survive, but to LIVE. To enjoy life; to feel the wind on your face, to mean something to others and to yourself.
    All is not lost.
    If anyone has read this far and needs advice, resources, or just someone to listen to them, please please please comment and I’ll be more than happy to help. If you need a place to move to, I can help you find some options or at least provide the resources for you to find someplace.
    I know it’s hard. It’s honestly fucking awful. And every day will be hard, until one day it isn’t quite as bad. And until that day comes, remember that there are 6,000 people who’ve commented on this video that feel the same way as you do, people who truly understand how hard it is to speak up about your pain and want to help you. If nothing else, we’re all here for you. Because we will never allow someone else to suffer silently as we have. Please, reach out. Sorry to rant on, but this is so important and if you needed to see this today then I really hope it helped and that things get better for you. 💜 ;

  • @ErikaWillenbrecht
    @ErikaWillenbrecht 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    The fact that these songs hit on the nose exactly how my depression hits. And there are thousands of you here too shows proof we aren't alone, do not let anyone invalidate you. I've finally made steps to cut these people off because they are not a part of my healing.
    We all have our stories, some similar some not so similar but don't let another person's pain make you look down on yours. Because together you can help each other put it behind you. Hugs to all

  • @DeltaEchoFoxtrot
    @DeltaEchoFoxtrot 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Damn, music for every type of mood.
    My Emotional Song Spectrum:
    Grateful - "Hallelujah"
    Betrayed - "First Blood"
    Forgotten - "Would Anyone Care"
    Unmotivated - "Sacred"
    Weak - "Unbreakable"
    Literally anything - Citizen Soldier has a song for that.

    • @shafireman700
      @shafireman700 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      EYYYYY What about
      Found and
      Weight of the world?

    • @CitizenSoldier
      @CitizenSoldier  3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Love it!

    • @angelanav1946
      @angelanav1946 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@shafireman700 those are for anxiety attacks

    • @shafireman700
      @shafireman700 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@angelanav1946 Ok that I can understand.

  • @detectivepinkerton3258
    @detectivepinkerton3258 3 ปีที่แล้ว +25

    This might just be my new favorite Citizen Soldier song

    • @leviceal2645
      @leviceal2645 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Same

    • @CitizenSoldier
      @CitizenSoldier  3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Whoa! Glad to hear that 💜

    • @DragonBlade98
      @DragonBlade98 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Yea I have heard this the first time and it was already well on its way to the top. I have now listened to it probably 10 times in the last 3 hours and I have to say its at the top, the way they have done this song was so perfect

  • @lucifernovak
    @lucifernovak 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Just realised it has been just over a year and I'm still here. Last night I saved my best friend and now I'm revisiting this song. Thank you for this song. This will always hold a spot because I would have heard it if I had been successful 🖤

  • @Shadow-905
    @Shadow-905 3 ปีที่แล้ว +383

    A wise man once said:
    It's better to survive the pain than to give into the hate and pain because if you do then you will lose all that you gained and will gain

    • @Xaforn
      @Xaforn 3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      That is debatable

    • @TechBoyTuber
      @TechBoyTuber 3 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      What’s the point in surviving the pain, when you’re just gonna lose anyway, regardless of how much you’ve gain. We’re all bound to die and lose eventually, so there really isn’t any point anymore

    • @Shadow-905
      @Shadow-905 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      The point of surviving the pian is the not about avoiding the inevitable end but the live to see those who will care the next day

    • @clarkebooth905
      @clarkebooth905 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Bro If you're gonna name yourself after an anime character at least make that character your profile picture.

    • @Shadow-905
      @Shadow-905 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@clarkebooth905 yeah but that's just cool with a combo

  • @jaydenjohnson8239
    @jaydenjohnson8239 3 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    I love how this band can understand every emotion an trauma and make such relatable songs everytime I only found them a year ago and they have helped me a lot with my depression they need more recognition 🤘

  • @hannahfreeman1357
    @hannahfreeman1357 3 ปีที่แล้ว +456

    "Let me die cuz I cant take what's living in my head"
    Felt that man.

    • @aubriemckenzie7112
      @aubriemckenzie7112 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Same…

    • @ncs4life637
      @ncs4life637 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Same

    • @hotpink-bf4cs
      @hotpink-bf4cs ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Same

    • @sarahfunston-dg3jf
      @sarahfunston-dg3jf ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Same here

    • @pakuvang4775
      @pakuvang4775 ปีที่แล้ว

      One of the reasons I'm s*icidal right there. The first one being, "No one would care if I was gone." The second one being, "I want to end my suffering."

  • @candiwardteeslink3600
    @candiwardteeslink3600 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    God is amazing and still in the business of making the impossible possible, faith of a mustard seed can and will make the enemy flee from us. May Jesus Christ guide the way. Amen

  • @elliemaej520
    @elliemaej520 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    Just beautiful 💜; :'(
    Sometimes people know your ill but still they don't understand the things that play over and over in your head, the only way they seem to get it is when you fall so low or when it's too late to show that they care

  • @someoneinthebigbigwideworl2848
    @someoneinthebigbigwideworl2848 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    This song is for sure not just lyrics thrown onto paper it actually has meaning to it and it’s insanely understandable and I’m sure that at least 50% of people listen to this song the lyrics speak to them too

  • @verioriginalhandle
    @verioriginalhandle 3 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    The "will anyone believe the hell of being me before I decide to be the dying proof" hits hard

  • @greendragon8169
    @greendragon8169 ปีที่แล้ว +9

    3rd song of theirs that I have listened to. I started crying. No one ever understands but this song just told said everything I ever wanted to say. I'm 17 and haven't cried in 4 years. Thank you for making music like this.

    • @konikiispoka800
      @konikiispoka800 ปีที่แล้ว

      Im 17 too, and im lying all alone rn trying not to cry, 'cause of the parents behind the door of my room
      When we're young we cry so loud that everyone can hear us. But when we're order we cry in silence to not enable anyone hear us😭🤐

  • @realmofnonsense6228
    @realmofnonsense6228 3 ปีที่แล้ว +107

    As a trans MTF, living in a hard strict conservative household of a Christian Pastor, I feel this song so hard. You guys have such a talent in speaking to your listeners through your music, never stop.

    • @nyo-bolootens9167
      @nyo-bolootens9167 3 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      I am transgender: I am ftm. Know the fight... I am sending hugs for you.

    • @xmothyz
      @xmothyz 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      i am a closeted MTF, not being able to talk to my parents about myself is really shitty. and dont even get me started about the subtle transphobic things they say sometimes. Anyways, best of luck to you!

    • @hewhohesitatesdisintegrate3576
      @hewhohesitatesdisintegrate3576 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I'm trans ftm. I'm out to my household, and they still don't use my correct name or pronouns. I understand how you feel. You won't be living with those people forever though, and things will get better

    • @teaganewing3384
      @teaganewing3384 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I’m 32, “mom” of three biological kiddos and “wife” of 15 yrs. My name is Teagan and I am a man. FtM. I hear you. I get you. Hold on.

    • @stevenmcdowell6915
      @stevenmcdowell6915 3 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Your pastor is trying to help. Is your pastor a born again Christian. If so listen to him. Jesus wants to set you free from sin. Trust Jesus.

  • @cupidevergreen6820
    @cupidevergreen6820 3 ปีที่แล้ว +28

    This singer/band is the most life relating band/singer I've ever heard. Each song after another is so relatable to my situations.
    Thank you for bringing us these songs people suffering with depression, anxiety, self esteem, etc can relate to.

  • @williamgarvin9894
    @williamgarvin9894 3 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    It’s like he took a walk in my shoes this song expresses exactly how I feel

  • @shoni32
    @shoni32 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    This is a dilemma. If you love someone, you let them go. But, in this scenario, you love the person and refuse to leave them behind; despite pleas. Love means to be there 24/7 in the difficult times no matter what comes.💯

  • @crimsonwolf2066
    @crimsonwolf2066 3 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    Just seeing the background text "Somebody else has it worse than you" broke me down.
    Sometime last year, I told my dad how I felt, and that I wanted to end my life. Back then he would often call me a failure, disappointment, and a disgrace. He didnt hit me much, but there was a lot of verbal abuse. When I told him how I felt, he called me my step-sister's name, because she has depression too, and mocked me for how I felt. That night I held a knife to my throat for hours, crying silently in my room. The next day I told him what happened, and rather than getting help or something, he explained how him and my aunt had it worse. I'm out of there now, and I have a temporary restraining order on him, due to him continuing after I warned him I would call the police. He threatened my life back then even, and... honestly, this music is what's kept me going, both back then, and up until now.
    Thank you, Citizen Soldier, for this music, it means a lot, to me and a lot of others. I'm usually too self-conscious and anti-social to leave a comment, but... tonight I just felt I should, so thank you for everything you all do, and I hope you keep putting out music like this, that people need. I love you all.

  • @Cosmicgothx
    @Cosmicgothx 3 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    I broke at 'when no one knows you're sick'. At my worst point all my friends thought I was fine...

    • @shafireman700
      @shafireman700 3 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      It's sad how easily a mask can be faked though. If you've been down the road long enough the easier it becomes.

    • @CitizenSoldier
      @CitizenSoldier  3 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      🖤🖤🖤

  • @jessek1629
    @jessek1629 3 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    Your songs are so incredible and so helpful! I’ve struggled mentally for years and I’ve tried to talk to my family about it and I always get told that “Your not really suffering”, “Just pray” or “Your life isn’t that bad” I have two friends in my life that I can talk to thankfully and they understand.

  • @shellaebonalo2529
    @shellaebonalo2529 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Dear Citizen Soldier Thank you for keeping me alive and fighting tonight because I am afraid if not because of your songs and also because of my dog. I am no longer living here on earth. Thank you I love you all! 😘😘😘

    • @TK-uz4ts
      @TK-uz4ts 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      If you are struggling please don't hesitate to reach out to those you trust or consider seeing a therapist. You are not alone in this. Life is worth the pain we go through so stay strong. I wish you all the best

    • @shellaebonalo2529
      @shellaebonalo2529 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@TK-uz4ts thank you for the sweet message and comforting message. Godbless you :)