After becoming secure I still carry some of those traits like the high need for learning. I think we carry our strengths after becoming secure and work on our weaknesses.
I'm a textbook case of DA, and all of these describe me exactly. My peers say these words about me all the time. We're useless at being emotionally present, but we're helpful to get to the bottom of a problem. We're drawn to the intellect because the mind is the safest place we have. As a child I grew my pleasure and reward sensors around the imagination parts of my brain, which means my imagination is my emotional epicenter. There's another superpower we have that you didn't mention. People come to us for help because we're often very generous with our brainpower and we don't make things emotionally complicated. Several people use me as their go-to person to process a difficult situation. No gossip, no fuss.
Never have I watched a video that described me to such a "T!" All of the qualities presented here are the EXACT compliments I get from friends, family, and romantic partners! From getting the three college degrees (triple major), to becoming an international martial arts champion, to building a business whilst sleeping in my car and being named best martial art school in my city for 2023, I have no doubt those strengths you presented in this video is what got me where I am today! I'm definitely saving this video to favorites so I can watch it again and again! 😁💪🏿🥋👊🏿
DA here. All apply except 6. I needed to improve at setting boundaries. As noted in the comments, the DA traits brought career success but relationship problems. Fortunately, I was able to ask for help with the emotional discomfort, and that has brought some healing.
Excellent video on DA strengths! I would love to see a video series where you go in-depth on how to set boundaries, as well as boundary scripts for the attachment styles. Thank you Thais & PDS team!
The best strength a DA has for me as FA..is they truly consider their words…I rarely find a dismissive avoidant lying about their feelings or their intentions..maybe because they don’t fear losing the connection? they are harshly honest sometimes..it boosts my trust in them honestly…as FA I’m only real when I’m extremely angry..other than that i tend to hide parts of the truth that will get me judged😅
I absolutely love the strengths series. As an AP, I noticed while watching this video on DA strengths that a lot of it brought out my golden shadow. I would love to possess these qualities too, in addition to my own strengths as an AP. I must now reflect on the ways in which I may be neglecting these qualities that are calling to me to be possessed/expressed. Thank you infinitely, Thais!
Thank you for this. Following your presentation I have reinforced my understanding that we need to consider the various emotional profiles not as disease, but as a diversity of profiles that enrich society, each one having different challenges to meet in order to reach personal growth and that of our environment. In this perspective, a totally secure attachment style can be considered as a smug complacency that is stunning personal and social growth. Every cloud has a silver lining This is most helpful
Reminded me of my friend passing away falling on the floor all of us were in a panic mood…but not our dismissive avoidant friend…she grabbed her calmly like it’s normal for people to face death in front of her she literally saved her life…I could never be action oriented in such situation , impressive
@@cloudslady3400 Same thing happened with my 93 yr old dad. Died in my arms. I didn't have any previous experience with death or dying. (My dad had a massive stroke, so there was no saving him.)
so glad to see a focus on DA positivity! one thing i find very positive about the dynamic i often experience with DAs as an FA is that it sort of naturally encourages *&* reinforces me working on becoming secure 💜 understand why the "anxious - avoidant" trap gets attention, but i find its sort of inverse is also powerful. the more i offer a DA acceptance & trust, the more it seems they feel comfortable & safe to validate & connect deeply with me thank you for sharing so much compassion & insight on youtube for those of us who can't afford the incredibly reasonable paid site! it's helped me grow as an individual & in my relationship 🌈 for those who *can* afford it (it's probably cheaper than any co-payment you'd have for groups, etc & there's literally stuff nearly every day!) *highly* recommend at least checking out the trial
Sorry but i don`t understand this video. In all the ones before you explain that the behavior of the DA is a consequence of deep rooted fears resulting in unhealthy coping strategies. now all of a sudden its supposed to be their strengths...? and rightly so, why would you want to change your strength then, anyway? ....it is like admiring a notorious liar for being such a brilliant storyteller....
i have the same thought every time i watch one of the "strength" videos. Thais gets a lot correct, but every now and then, she makes claims i deeply disagree with.
DA here. I can vouch that the listed strengths are the real deal. The relationship and emotional issues are separate. Gibson suggests that the strengths can help fix unhealthy coping strategies. DAs get a lot of negative comments in attachment-style videos, but a non-superficial study of attachment theory reveals they are no more problematic than the other insecure styles.
Do you have any of these strengths as a dismissive avoidant? Have you learned anything from this video? 💜
After becoming secure I still carry some of those traits like the high need for learning. I think we carry our strengths after becoming secure and work on our weaknesses.
I have them all ❤
Becoming secure from any insecure attachment is one of the best things because you can still hold onto the positive qualities.
I'm a textbook case of DA, and all of these describe me exactly. My peers say these words about me all the time. We're useless at being emotionally present, but we're helpful to get to the bottom of a problem. We're drawn to the intellect because the mind is the safest place we have. As a child I grew my pleasure and reward sensors around the imagination parts of my brain, which means my imagination is my emotional epicenter. There's another superpower we have that you didn't mention. People come to us for help because we're often very generous with our brainpower and we don't make things emotionally complicated. Several people use me as their go-to person to process a difficult situation. No gossip, no fuss.
Never have I watched a video that described me to such a "T!" All of the qualities presented here are the EXACT compliments I get from friends, family, and romantic partners! From getting the three college degrees (triple major), to becoming an international martial arts champion, to building a business whilst sleeping in my car and being named best martial art school in my city for 2023, I have no doubt those strengths you presented in this video is what got me where I am today! I'm definitely saving this video to favorites so I can watch it again and again! 😁💪🏿🥋👊🏿
I LOVE how you highlight the way these skills can help improve ALL KINDS of relationships! Even Professional! PERFECT!
DA here. All apply except 6. I needed to improve at setting boundaries. As noted in the comments, the DA traits brought career success but relationship problems. Fortunately, I was able to ask for help with the emotional discomfort, and that has brought some healing.
Excellent video on DA strengths!
I would love to see a video series where you go in-depth on how to set boundaries, as well as boundary scripts for the attachment styles.
Thank you Thais & PDS team!
The best strength a DA has for me as FA..is they truly consider their words…I rarely find a dismissive avoidant lying about their feelings or their intentions..maybe because they don’t fear losing the connection? they are harshly honest sometimes..it boosts my trust in them honestly…as FA I’m only real when I’m extremely angry..other than that i tend to hide parts of the truth that will get me judged😅
I love that you're doing the strengths videos!
I love this! Thank you for highlighting my super powers 💥
yayyy I love the strengths videos! Very accurate as always!
I absolutely love the strengths series. As an AP, I noticed while watching this video on DA strengths that a lot of it brought out my golden shadow. I would love to possess these qualities too, in addition to my own strengths as an AP. I must now reflect on the ways in which I may be neglecting these qualities that are calling to me to be possessed/expressed. Thank you infinitely, Thais!
So good to acknowledge these things.
Thank you for this. Following your presentation I have reinforced my understanding that we need to consider the various emotional profiles not as disease, but as a diversity of profiles that enrich society, each one having different challenges to meet in order to reach personal growth and that of our environment.
In this perspective, a totally secure attachment style can be considered as a smug complacency that is stunning personal and social growth.
Every cloud has a silver lining
This is most helpful
Thanks for mentioning the EQ!
Add: Clarity in a Crisis (when other people may be "losing their heads")
Yup! My former boss found my calmness during crisis shocking. I work in a field where Crisis Management is one of our key functions.
Oh this is true!
Reminded me of my friend passing away falling on the floor all of us were in a panic mood…but not our dismissive avoidant friend…she grabbed her calmly like it’s normal for people to face death in front of her she literally saved her life…I could never be action oriented in such situation , impressive
@@cloudslady3400 Same thing happened with my 93 yr old dad. Died in my arms. I didn't have any previous experience with death or dying. (My dad had a massive stroke, so there was no saving him.)
so glad to see a focus on DA positivity! one thing i find very positive about the dynamic i often experience with DAs as an FA is that it sort of naturally encourages *&* reinforces me working on becoming secure 💜
understand why the "anxious - avoidant" trap gets attention, but i find its sort of inverse is also powerful. the more i offer a DA acceptance & trust, the more it seems they feel comfortable & safe to validate & connect deeply with me
thank you for sharing so much compassion & insight on youtube for those of us who can't afford the incredibly reasonable paid site! it's helped me grow as an individual & in my relationship 🌈
for those who *can* afford it (it's probably cheaper than any co-payment you'd have for groups, etc & there's literally stuff nearly every day!) *highly* recommend at least checking out the trial
🤓 I thought I was a DA until I took your assessment test. I will accept securely attached. But I don't know what to learn now..😅
They're great at money making and good travel buddies.
Yes true, these traits are definitely very attractive about DA men.
Thais I have a question: Do you believe that you may one day pursue a doctorate?
Is there any correlation between the dismissive avoidant and ASD 1?
When you discover that you are a DA & an INFJ combined, you really have a very complex identity .
Thought we're only getting shit here 😭
💛🎄🌅
Sorry but i don`t understand this video. In all the ones before you explain that the behavior of the DA is a consequence of deep rooted fears resulting in unhealthy coping strategies. now all of a sudden its supposed to be their strengths...? and rightly so, why would you want to change your strength then, anyway? ....it is like admiring a notorious liar for being such a brilliant storyteller....
i have the same thought every time i watch one of the "strength" videos. Thais gets a lot correct, but every now and then, she makes claims i deeply disagree with.
DA here. I can vouch that the listed strengths are the real deal. The relationship and emotional issues are separate. Gibson suggests that the strengths can help fix unhealthy coping strategies. DAs get a lot of negative comments in attachment-style videos, but a non-superficial study of attachment theory reveals they are no more problematic than the other insecure styles.
First 🎉