29 Minutes of Tom Segura

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 15 พ.ย. 2024

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  • @forrest472
    @forrest472 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10010

    One of the best and most realistically relatable comedians there is

    • @justinbrooke3511
      @justinbrooke3511 2 ปีที่แล้ว +92

      Dude has like 100 million dollars and drives luxury automobiles...

    • @error404blah
      @error404blah 2 ปีที่แล้ว +206

      @@justinbrooke3511 yeah, that's his life now. But before that he was a broke loser like the rest of us accumulating great life experience and stories. So chill dude.

    • @utopiaOKC
      @utopiaOKC 2 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      His defense of Chris Rock solidified it for me even tho I had seen all his content previously

    • @shenmoney
      @shenmoney 2 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      No question. One of the greats who gives nary a fxxk about any of society's pussification tactics. 😎✊🏼

    • @justinbrooke3511
      @justinbrooke3511 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@error404blah How I am I not chill. I just pointed out that he's not relatable at all. None of you are world famous comedians. You don't have multiple podcasts that crush. If he wasn't particularly extraordinary no one would know who is.

  • @shaan702
    @shaan702 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13643

    Best Japanese comic in the game right now.

    • @Nate_Jensen
      @Nate_Jensen 2 ปีที่แล้ว +75

      Lmao

    • @cedarpoplar
      @cedarpoplar 2 ปีที่แล้ว +109

      Segura.. what?? Japanese?

    • @HipHopRepair
      @HipHopRepair 2 ปีที่แล้ว +590

      *Ssssssssegurrrraaaaaa*

    • @jsmillsi
      @jsmillsi 2 ปีที่แล้ว +115

      @@HipHopRepair hah, YT even gives it a translate

    • @dankthrone6668
      @dankthrone6668 2 ปีที่แล้ว +227

      Tomuske SEGUUURAAAAURU

  • @Mellowcanuck33
    @Mellowcanuck33 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4134

    "Some people suck."
    Can't argue with it. You must accept it because truth is undeniable. Masterful play.

    • @sirtko
      @sirtko 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      😅😂🤣

    • @zdubsmith
      @zdubsmith 2 ปีที่แล้ว +42

      I’ve been using it at my retail job ever since I saw his special. Truly crippling in an argument

    • @slimnfade
      @slimnfade 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Everybody sucks the worst are sore losers that go to look at DC monuments and waste moneys.

    • @karabinjr
      @karabinjr 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Imagining that the world must be just is self-destructive.

    • @jrverde218
      @jrverde218 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      I use this quote weekly unfortunately

  • @jojoerasmusnt6458
    @jojoerasmusnt6458 ปีที่แล้ว +1190

    You don't often see Japanese comics go mainstream. Hats off to you, Segura-san.

    • @miikeyg123
      @miikeyg123 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Segura-san 😂😂

    • @Tcrror
      @Tcrror ปีที่แล้ว +2

      ​@@miikeyg123Sure-san. Is that like "Sure, Jan"?

    • @darkmatter96
      @darkmatter96 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Lmfao

    • @ashenone3883
      @ashenone3883 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@TcrrorKinda like segura sir. I dont know much about japanese culture.

    • @freespiritwithnature4384
      @freespiritwithnature4384 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

      ​@@ashenone3883ITS 11: 44 minutes in.

  • @e.wwwwww
    @e.wwwwww 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4976

    "You don't burden other people with your real-world problems during a courteous exchange!" probably most factual and positive statement I've seen from a comedian

    • @ImNotaRussianBot
      @ImNotaRussianBot 2 ปีที่แล้ว +124

      I was a cashier for a long time and had these meaningless exchanges multiple times every quarter hour. Once, I was fed up and just answered honestly. The guy goes, "I don't care. I'm trying to be polite." I was mortified and also angry. Like, are you? Being polite? Dude, all you had to do was nod and make some sympathetic noises. No need to be a dick. Lesson learned. I guess Segura is in that camp. It's really, really mind-meltingly boring to be a cashier and work with the public. I guess, I wanted a real connection and Brent The D-bag wanted to keep it real.

    • @timothyalan34
      @timothyalan34 2 ปีที่แล้ว +41

      @@ImNotaRussianBot ya feel better?

    • @e.wwwwww
      @e.wwwwww 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@ImNotaRussianBot I see where you’re coming from, but I’m gonna be 100% real with you as someone who worked retail and now kinda works food service (deli stuff)…work isn’t a place to be real with your emotions like that. Customers might be real with you, but they NEVER wanna hear your shit. They just want to be nice, maybe feel-dump onto you, and then leave. 99% of people say “hello, how are you?” because it’s seen as the socially proper thing to do not to be seen as a cunt, but none of us really give a fuck how the other guy is doing. If you have so much that you need to ‘dump’ onto someone, I’d talk to a therapist, because they’re paid to deal with that and can even help solve the issue! But never treat anyone at work (coworkers, bosses or anyone) like anything more than a stranger who doesn’t care about you…just think; how much do you care about any rando you see somewhere? not enough to wanna hear all their life problems AND be expected to listen else you be seen as rude, that’s for sure!

    • @ImNotaRussianBot
      @ImNotaRussianBot 2 ปีที่แล้ว +59

      @@e.wwwwww Oh, for sure. It was a moment of weakness. I felt foolish. At the same time, I think I needed a release. Cashiering in a busy grocery store is so soulless. I think I wanted a connection to a human when my back was killing me, my feet were swollen, and my internal dialogue was the black and white static seen on TVs.

    • @ZeroMaverik97
      @ZeroMaverik97 2 ปีที่แล้ว +99

      I think we, as a collective, should probably just stop saying how you doing as a greeting. If you don't wanna know, just don't ask.

  • @GeminiJu
    @GeminiJu 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4453

    Segura Is Hands Down My Favorite Japanese Comedian.

  • @ZeranZeran
    @ZeranZeran ปีที่แล้ว +119

    "Will you be eating in your car?"
    "Yeah, I bet you will"
    PICK IT UP

  • @billyray4716
    @billyray4716 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2219

    I've heard all of these, but watching them is so much funnier, his body language is the best part

    • @sailaab
      @sailaab 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Wow! :-)
      You did!¿

    • @ThisIsWheelLife
      @ThisIsWheelLife 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Right same! I started writing stand up the other day well I am a quadriplegic so it’s more sit down but that’s beside the point and this guy is so much my humor I love it!

    • @MrTPain
      @MrTPain 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@ThisIsWheelLife good start baby! I can already feel your good vibes!!
      DO YOUR STAND-UP while you lounge! Baby cake 🥰🤗

    • @ThisIsWheelLife
      @ThisIsWheelLife 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      @@MrTPain Thank you I appreciate that so much! I just love making people laugh and have a better day and show people that even though life can fuck you up you can still fuck it back!
      Couple of my jokes
      You’ve heard of The sword making show forged in fire, well I was forged in a Firebird, yeah right out back actually!
      If at anytime during the show you see my legs moving nooo they still don’t work. Im just practicing my Quady Kicks!
      But be sure to watch out for my Quady Chop!👏🏼
      There’s one good thing about being paralyzed. I can’t feel my nuts itching anymore.
      Went for a stroll one day in my wheelchair. my battery ended up dying and I needed a jump. I was just glad I had my Cripple A card thankfully now a lifetime member.

    • @MrTPain
      @MrTPain 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@ThisIsWheelLife dues paid.

  • @-dopeland-3349
    @-dopeland-3349 ปีที่แล้ว +629

    I listened to his bit about the bank lobby guy the other day and the very next day, I went to the bank and I was standing behind this dude in line. People moved up, he didn’t. Teller said he’ll help the next customer, and the guy looked up and said “oh I’m just waiting”
    Idk wtf was going on hahaha

    • @jackalexande
      @jackalexande ปีที่แล้ว +8

      what the fuck I would be mad

    • @-dopeland-3349
      @-dopeland-3349 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      I was somewhere between mad at him and just confused

    • @JD_tcb
      @JD_tcb ปีที่แล้ว +19

      Always awkward when they ask you to "wait" at a place where there's usually no waiting. And they may ask you to just "take a seat over there" but if you do that... you may never hear from anyone ever again lmao. I'm guessing that was that dude's predicament.

    • @YtShya
      @YtShya ปีที่แล้ว +1

      😂😂😂

    • @djLagwayEnjoyer
      @djLagwayEnjoyer ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@-dopeland-3349he was probably waiting for the manager or dropping something off and they just told him to wait there honestly

  • @MonkeDLuffy
    @MonkeDLuffy 2 ปีที่แล้ว +348

    The baby in the movie theatre bit cracks me up. I saw Tom in Indianapolis for the "I'm coming everywhere" Tour and someone brought a baby into the theatre. Tom's reaction was fucking priceless when he noticed.

    • @kylirwolffe5614
      @kylirwolffe5614 ปีที่แล้ว +34

      They've musta planned it! How'd he take it?😂😂😂

    • @firasabouzaki7805
      @firasabouzaki7805 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      I need answers damn it

    • @LusciousTwinkle
      @LusciousTwinkle 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +3

      People are waiting for answers here dude!

    • @Vanness11
      @Vanness11 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

      It’s been a year @monkeDLuffy the people need answers! 😂

    • @MonkeDLuffy
      @MonkeDLuffy 11 หลายเดือนก่อน +17

      @@Vanness11 Tom was mid-bit when the baby let out a typically baby sound and tom hesitated and glanced to the audience. Tom then tried to continue only to be interrupted by the baby noises once again. Tom spots the baby, proceeds to do a double take, and shouts "Is that a fucking baby!?" There was a few other lines but tom went back to the material rather quickly.

  • @Kid_Ying
    @Kid_Ying 2 ปีที่แล้ว +951

    "Do you drive to work or does somebody drop you off?" is one of the funniest things I've ever heard because we've all worked with that person. I'm also realizing that Tom is a perfect mirror of my sense of humor.

    • @OSgaming93
      @OSgaming93 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      I tried and tried but couldn’t understand the joke, can someone plz explain?

    • @Kid_Ying
      @Kid_Ying ปีที่แล้ว +94

      @@OSgaming93 "Slow" people often are unable to to drive, so they have to have someone give them a ride to work. Basically he's talking about someone who is a little mentally challenged.

    • @thenotoriousdig610
      @thenotoriousdig610 ปีที่แล้ว +47

      ​@@Kid_Ying thank you brother you helped all non native English speakers in here

    • @Banks0213
      @Banks0213 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      As a native english speaker, I couldn't even figure it out.

    • @slowmo9642
      @slowmo9642 ปีที่แล้ว +41

      @@Banks0213 do you get dropped off at work?

  • @kingsnoodledoodle7380
    @kingsnoodledoodle7380 ปีที่แล้ว +352

    First time seeing him and hearing his content, freaking hilarious this had me in tears!

    • @familyguy1996iscool
      @familyguy1996iscool ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Same here. I saw his podcast first and hated him. But now that I see his comedy I have a change of feelings. He's hilarious😂

    • @r.alexander9075
      @r.alexander9075 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      His podcast is way pess fun than his stand up.

  • @averageenjoyer3934
    @averageenjoyer3934 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1727

    Tom is BY FAR the most consistently hilarious comedian. Theres never a clip that doesn't have my face hurting from laughing

    • @billyray4716
      @billyray4716 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      I absolutely agree, I can listen to his stuff over and over

    • @elbeetlebeasto
      @elbeetlebeasto 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @BB SHOW COMEDY what

    • @charlespancamo9771
      @charlespancamo9771 2 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Bill Burr is far more consistent

    • @effu9593
      @effu9593 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@charlespancamo9771 booo he sucks

    • @averageenjoyer3934
      @averageenjoyer3934 2 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      @@charlespancamo9771 Well idk about "more" but Bill Burr is definitely one of those types of comedians too. Just his manner of speech would make you burst out laughing!

  • @bmjake
    @bmjake 2 ปีที่แล้ว +509

    Tom Segura is one of the best story tellers of all time. I should know, I’ve been listening to stories for like 93 years.

    • @rawbhd4477
      @rawbhd4477 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      @@adamrushford who fucking cares if it’s true or not it makes people laugh

    • @khalilrahme5227
      @khalilrahme5227 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@adamrushford nobody goes to comedians for truth ? You mean like George carlin's entire career ?

    • @captainspaulding5963
      @captainspaulding5963 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@adamrushford yeah, you sound like you could mess up a wet dream....

    • @dianedehart
      @dianedehart 2 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      The "93 years" is part of his Steven Segal bit

    • @DrkStrSkt
      @DrkStrSkt ปีที่แล้ว

      @@adamrushford lol have you ever taken like, high school level history even
      cause we kinda been depending on comedians to spread the truth since the fucking dark ages my guy lmfao. you sound dumb as hell.

  • @jusdrew
    @jusdrew 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +22

    Being a comedian this funny makes the crowd sound like a sitcom

  • @boogeyratt
    @boogeyratt 2 ปีที่แล้ว +468

    I absolutely love Tom Segura. He takes all my dark thoughts and puts a voice to them, and delivers them with timing I'll never be capable of.

    • @BenEnlet29
      @BenEnlet29 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Couldn't have said it better 💯

    • @trill2527
      @trill2527 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      My guy all you see is a white tee shirt get up .over so many heads .pure comedy.

    • @devonlockwood1477
      @devonlockwood1477 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      So true. I'm certain he helps people's days all over the world. He's awesome!

    • @silewis9396
      @silewis9396 ปีที่แล้ว

      Same. As Dave says thats why he gets paid the big bucks

    • @toddbrooks2464
      @toddbrooks2464 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Had to check who this Tom guy is due to his "thoughts" on garth Brooks lately, I must say I nowreally miss Sam kinison & mitch hedberg both ends of comedic genius spectrum and not at all figuring is this Tom guy on any level w those 2 dunno why he's popular? Maybe I'm old school???

  • @reemal-hadhood8355
    @reemal-hadhood8355 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1679

    Wasn't expecting to laugh 😅😆 this was my first time seeing this guy and I didn't stop laughing from the minute he started speaking 😂🤣

    • @Akratos2020
      @Akratos2020 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Your just white 💀

    • @cloudstorage9928
      @cloudstorage9928 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      😂

    • @larsvogelpoel4396
      @larsvogelpoel4396 2 ปีที่แล้ว +66

      go watch ymh podcast bro

    • @thenewbloodvii8360
      @thenewbloodvii8360 2 ปีที่แล้ว +45

      keep your jeans high and tight!

    • @zyourzgrandzmaz
      @zyourzgrandzmaz 2 ปีที่แล้ว +48

      You should also checkout his buddy Brent Krystal's, he's got some good stories to

  • @xBLiiDz
    @xBLiiDz 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    I'm so proud of him. He's been doing comedy for 87 years.

  • @user59371
    @user59371 2 ปีที่แล้ว +610

    Seen these bits 100 times each, still watched it all and laughed the entire time

    • @effu9593
      @effu9593 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Have you seen Josh blue?

    • @bubzilla6137
      @bubzilla6137 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@effu9593 I have, and he's hilarious! 🙂🤣😂

    • @donguapo7862
      @donguapo7862 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Same...every few months

  • @mickcollins25
    @mickcollins25 2 ปีที่แล้ว +139

    2 great sayings of Segura: “I could tell he never hugged his children”, Some ppl suck”. Brilliant.

  • @ericmarshall8413
    @ericmarshall8413 ปีที่แล้ว +150

    His impression of a baby sounds like the noise your phone makes when it vibrates on the table.

    • @victorythroughharmony11
      @victorythroughharmony11 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Most deep voiced baby ever known to mankind

    • @n8vmilk
      @n8vmilk 2 หลายเดือนก่อน

      Lmao I know exactly what you mean

  • @epsilonsolves1457
    @epsilonsolves1457 2 ปีที่แล้ว +120

    Tom’s by far my favorite comedian. Even him acting in movies has me dying😂

    • @bill2953
      @bill2953 20 วันที่ผ่านมา

      Bill Burr is hilarious, Kevin Hart is a fall down riot and you people talk about Segura like he's the second coming of Richard Pryor.. You people are dulled down.

  • @jexanrp8642
    @jexanrp8642 2 ปีที่แล้ว +446

    Why Tom is so relatable is because he only became super abundantly wealthy in the past half decade. He lived a lot of his career as a broke comedian that had a view of the world like a lot of us everyday humans do. It's why it's relatable & fuckin hilarious. Coming home from a retail job & popping up YMH is the best shit in the world.

    • @tellurye
      @tellurye 2 ปีที่แล้ว +9

      Um.... yeah, not super abundantly wealthy. 12 mil (6 because his wife and he own equal shares) $12 mil is cool, Id take it. But no where near "super abundantly wealthy: - considering most of that is Real Estate and other property items.

    • @tonyploma2330
      @tonyploma2330 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      YMH?

    • @STSGuitar16
      @STSGuitar16 2 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      @@tellurye dude makes stupid money touring these days. On the Are You Garbage podcast with him recently, he admitted to spending $50,000 on a single meal on his birthday this year. I'd say he's probably at least close to having an abundance of wealth at this point lol. Plus his new book is selling a lot too, so he is definitely getting some bucks from that. The man is doing alright.

    • @tellurye
      @tellurye 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@STSGuitar16 I didnt say he wasn't doing alright, just sayin $12 mil is not abundance, compared to others who are making 100 - 300 Mil.

    • @STSGuitar16
      @STSGuitar16 2 ปีที่แล้ว +27

      @@tellurye yeah, my point is $12M (I think he's almost certainly got more than that anyway) is what I would qualify as an abundance of money lol. Sure, maybe not when compared to Rogan or Elon, but $12M is more than enough money (aka an abundance) to live an exceedingly comfortable and even flashy life for his whole family. If you don't think that anyone who would drop $50k on one meal doesn't have an abundance of money, then we simply disagree, my friend lol

  • @eddydetect6960
    @eddydetect6960 ปีที่แล้ว +243

    I loved George Carlin, Louis CK and Bill Burr, now Tom Segura is added to the list.

    • @eaglefoxtrot1124
      @eaglefoxtrot1124 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Try Andrew Schulz and Rick Gervais too

    • @eddydetect6960
      @eddydetect6960 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@eaglefoxtrot1124 Andrew Schulz is too stupid for me (look at the interview he did with Louis CK, it's painful to watch) and Rick Gervais is excellent only on golden globes, his shows suck.

    • @onigiri9964
      @onigiri9964 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@eddydetect6960 Jimmy carr is funny~

    • @thisismyrealname2860
      @thisismyrealname2860 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@eddydetect6960 schulz can be low brow but I've also seen him go on some absolutely vicious tirades, I wouldn't write him off completely

    • @dranreb1118
      @dranreb1118 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Shane Gillis is brilliant.

  • @mattstyles2498
    @mattstyles2498 2 ปีที่แล้ว +211

    Now these longer videos.... now you're doing it right.

    • @ViltrumiteIsRite99
      @ViltrumiteIsRite99 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Tom became one of my favorites, so this is a treat for my morning routine!

    • @mattstyles2498
      @mattstyles2498 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@ViltrumiteIsRite99 ya me too

  • @hydrus77
    @hydrus77 2 ปีที่แล้ว +78

    Never saw this guy before, but this was playing in the background while I was cooking. I had to go back to the beginning to watch the whole thing, that's how good the parts I heard were. And I'm so happy I did. This guy is comedy gold.

    • @devl446
      @devl446 9 หลายเดือนก่อน

      I know he's so good. He was a guest on a podcast and I've watched his content ever since

  • @parr40
    @parr40 ปีที่แล้ว +41

    Tom is one of the best stand-up comics ever… his delivery is amazing

    • @jemmysmith8661
      @jemmysmith8661 5 หลายเดือนก่อน

      what?????
      stop, please

  • @jeremybr2020
    @jeremybr2020 2 ปีที่แล้ว +841

    Tom's impression of a baby crying is hilarious. Not so much accurate. But damn funny! 😆

    • @yasserfathelbab1534
      @yasserfathelbab1534 2 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      his impression of the father was funnier

    • @diddy2612
      @diddy2612 2 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      Omg I love his crying baby impression lol

    • @aadmstiles
      @aadmstiles 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Exactly :) not at all what an annoying baby sounds like. Yet still funny

    • @ReeferSmoker
      @ReeferSmoker 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      @@yasserfathelbab1534 eee, I lob de baby

    • @Hoganply
      @Hoganply 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      That's what Tom sounded like as a baby.

  • @number7417
    @number7417 2 ปีที่แล้ว +92

    He's a menace and I love his jokes. I laughed too much today. Thanks man!

  • @ham_5842
    @ham_5842 ปีที่แล้ว +46

    The part about the woman in the bar had me laughing uncontrollably for a solid ten minutes lol

  • @whymedk
    @whymedk 2 ปีที่แล้ว +436

    I'll take all the Minutes of Tom Segura, all day, all the time. Yes Please

    • @zyourzgrandzmaz
      @zyourzgrandzmaz 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Netflix has all his specials

    • @larrygraham4875
      @larrygraham4875 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I'm right there with ya

    • @bigblabble
      @bigblabble 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Keep em high & tight 😉

    • @effu9593
      @effu9593 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Your mom's house is his podcast on youtube

  • @JT_Soul_Tha_God
    @JT_Soul_Tha_God 2 ปีที่แล้ว +40

    Bro “Toying with the top” broke me down something bad. 💀 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @jakezickuhr3948
    @jakezickuhr3948 6 หลายเดือนก่อน +5

    watching tom grow from 2014 to now is just beautiful 😢 what a guy

  • @charleybetts1053
    @charleybetts1053 2 ปีที่แล้ว +28

    "Either make it Quiet, or GET IT OUT!"
    🤣 🤣 🤣 🤣

  • @vicnent651
    @vicnent651 2 ปีที่แล้ว +53

    "Well, could you?" is the funniest three word punchline I have ever heard.

  • @Takaichi666-
    @Takaichi666- ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Tom honestly is the best comedy story teller idk if that’s a term for comedians but the way he talks about anything and then gives the punchline it’s funny

  • @daltooinewestwood6380
    @daltooinewestwood6380 2 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    “Some people suck” is my new favorite bit

  • @chrisheimer1606
    @chrisheimer1606 2 ปีที่แล้ว +42

    Just sorta found Tom. Can't believe I been seeing him on the peripheral for a while now and didn't pick up on the fact that he's one of the best I've ever heard. I've gotta pay closer attention as I go through life.

    • @jaymoolah9048
      @jaymoolah9048 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Same

    • @Rhekon
      @Rhekon 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Read that as "best i ever had" 😂

  • @thechrismatos
    @thechrismatos ปีที่แล้ว +12

    You don't burden people with your real world problems during a courteous exchange 😂🤣🤣

  • @TheTexican05
    @TheTexican05 2 ปีที่แล้ว +157

    Tom has such a special blend of dark humor and sharp, observational imagination.
    Would love to spend a day around him and Christina P just to hear the sarcasm flow. ❤️ ✌️

    • @breadoflifefaiupu8992
      @breadoflifefaiupu8992 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      No

    • @FreddieMercuryyy
      @FreddieMercuryyy 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@breadoflifefaiupu8992 😂😂😂no what?

    • @Rhekon
      @Rhekon 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      They have a podcast. That's as close as you'll get probably.

    • @eldudereeno77
      @eldudereeno77 ปีที่แล้ว

      Stalker alert 📢🚨⚠️

  • @steevidrums
    @steevidrums 2 ปีที่แล้ว +65

    Absolutely LOVE Tom Segura! I do a lot of late night driving after a gig MILES away from home, 4 or 5 hours getting in after sun comes up, people are going to work as you're coming in from work that sorta shit. And honestly, the number of times I put on some Tom Segura to help with the drive is now almost a ritual on a long haul. Often I am sharing the drive with a few other people and I have now turned them on to him.
    Hope you read this Tom, you that man!

  • @ebgbees
    @ebgbees ปีที่แล้ว +7

    “Do I think it’s a *little* silly? Yeah, but so is badminton, and that’s an Olympic event!”

  • @tanneraitken3768
    @tanneraitken3768 2 ปีที่แล้ว +140

    Saw him live last night he’s better than ever

    • @christopherkay670
      @christopherkay670 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      He was hilarious at Ball Arena!! Hoping for another special soon

  • @ktswrld7338
    @ktswrld7338 2 ปีที่แล้ว +47

    "Hey man do you drive to work or does someone drop you off? 😉" LMAOOO

  • @seanriopel3132
    @seanriopel3132 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    22:41 That little grunt/chuckle he does just resonates with me.

  • @meverly4133
    @meverly4133 2 ปีที่แล้ว +68

    I've lived in Mexico five years. I'm Korean, and it still surprises me every time I speak to an Asian person in Spanish here. Glad I'm not the only dumbass.

    • @breadoflifefaiupu8992
      @breadoflifefaiupu8992 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Gross

    • @wm_9640
      @wm_9640 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Can I ask what brought you to live in Mexico? Just curious

    • @7대취타7
      @7대취타7 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@breadoflifefaiupu8992 nah i need an explanation to this comment? Wanna elaborate?

  • @Th3Gl4ds0meB34st
    @Th3Gl4ds0meB34st 2 ปีที่แล้ว +28

    Easily my favorite comedian. Could listen to him all day.

  • @Fresh_Biscuits
    @Fresh_Biscuits ปีที่แล้ว +4

    my go to response for when someone asks "how you doin?" is always "another day in paradise"
    seems to work

  • @niknighthawk92
    @niknighthawk92 2 ปีที่แล้ว +42

    Just wait for the next special, I saw him in Nashville this year and then bought tickets for my home town coming up. It’s SO good lol
    Favorite comedian by far

    • @karlcarlsburg9641
      @karlcarlsburg9641 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      He’s coming to my city soon.. Never been to a comedy show but maybe I’ll get tickets

    • @niknighthawk92
      @niknighthawk92 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@karlcarlsburg9641 you absolutely should. Worth every penny

  • @Jeudaos
    @Jeudaos 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    'is she making fudge, wtf is she doing' My favorite Japanese Mexican comedian

  • @heidivaliev3706
    @heidivaliev3706 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    Dude, you kill it! You are by far one of the best comedians out there today! Thanks for the laughs!!😆

  • @Bardaer
    @Bardaer 2 ปีที่แล้ว +26

    This is like a free mini special from Tom Segura and I LOVE IT! I have watched all three specials like probably 20times already each XD

  • @TheIsaeldelgadojaime
    @TheIsaeldelgadojaime 2 ปีที่แล้ว +76

    Tim is undoubtedly one of my favorite comedians. Dude has killer delivery 😮‍💨😂

    • @loodlebop
      @loodlebop 2 ปีที่แล้ว +46

      If you like Tim, you'll love this Tom guy

    • @jarnold1789
      @jarnold1789 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@loodlebop Who is Tom? I’ve only heard of Tim that pretends to wear one glove

    • @sidlee3118
      @sidlee3118 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I frikkin love Tim Segundo.

    • @johnsmith-hk3pd
      @johnsmith-hk3pd 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      whats the big deal, I see no difference between tim and tom, none

    • @seanscanlon9067
      @seanscanlon9067 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Tom has lost so much weight that the O has become an I.

  • @brandonwilliams9151
    @brandonwilliams9151 ปีที่แล้ว +8

    He's such a clever comedian how he deliver his lines is very strategic and explained in a manner that makes the audience envision the events

    • @cincylaw14
      @cincylaw14 ปีที่แล้ว

      Lol you have to be a bot wtf

  • @Nordikaventurier
    @Nordikaventurier 2 ปีที่แล้ว +46

    The first three minutes will always stand as one of the best stand up I've ever seen. Incredible delivery !

  • @fuffoon
    @fuffoon 2 ปีที่แล้ว +20

    I really like the beginning. I lived in Germany for 10 years and there the 'how are you' is taken literally. That is why hello is the normal casual greeting and how are you is for when you care or should pretend to care. The actual words are still significant.

  • @stewarthelms1
    @stewarthelms1 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I don’t care what anybody says. This is one of the top three comedians in the world.

  • @mattsammartino7827
    @mattsammartino7827 2 ปีที่แล้ว +270

    His next special is going to be incredible - saw him do his new hour in DC and this material is his best yet!

    • @justinbrooke3511
      @justinbrooke3511 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Hot sauce is the best.

    • @jamesprice2163
      @jamesprice2163 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Hell yeah honestly if I get the chance to see him live I'm jumping on it in a heartbeat

    • @prophetjones253
      @prophetjones253 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      Did you see his show where he’s coming everywhere or the cumming all over tour I can’t remember the title

    • @Rams8148
      @Rams8148 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Not saying you're wrong but stand up always seems funnier when you see it live.

    • @effu9593
      @effu9593 2 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@jamesprice2163 you're gonna jump him?

  • @devonlockwood1477
    @devonlockwood1477 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Tom saves the day for so many people worldwide! Each of his jokes get more and more funny as he describes them.
    By the end you have a laughter headache so bad, but it's always worth it!

  • @nastymclovin
    @nastymclovin 10 วันที่ผ่านมา +1

    "Diddleling" herself at the bar, gets a real new flavor in 2024

  • @dairyq123_YT
    @dairyq123_YT 2 ปีที่แล้ว +92

    Whoever started the video off with the in-n-out joke and ended with the in-n-out joke is a genius

    • @breadoflifefaiupu8992
      @breadoflifefaiupu8992 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      That's not genius.

    • @philipcatuogno2968
      @philipcatuogno2968 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@breadoflifefaiupu8992 Knock it off.

    • @ImNotaRussianBot
      @ImNotaRussianBot ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Do you mean NETFLIX, the giant company that employs thousands of experienced people who understand how to market visual products and edit videos? Those geniuses at the biggest streaming platform in the world?
      Yeah. You're a sharp tack.
      Oh, also Disney makes good movies. I hope I didn't blow your mind with that revelation.

  • @hanselito2416
    @hanselito2416 2 ปีที่แล้ว +105

    Lmao Tom is so on point sometimes I feel like I'm getting roasted in some of his bits 😂

  • @jeffymanking
    @jeffymanking ปีที่แล้ว +20

    The fact this video kept the punchline at the end 😂

  • @brandonnunez3644
    @brandonnunez3644 ปีที่แล้ว +36

    I had a friend growing up, who was half Peruvian half Japanese and he spoke English, Spanish, and Japanese. It was always funny as shit to see him speak Spanish.

    • @redmed10
      @redmed10 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      You sum up monolinguals.

  • @notsure1969
    @notsure1969 2 ปีที่แล้ว +29

    I've watched this at least 10 times and it hasn't gotten old yet.

  • @jesselucier7251
    @jesselucier7251 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    I’m going to see Tom Segura in Portland tomorrow and I’m so excited!

  • @dettolgerm8345
    @dettolgerm8345 2 ปีที่แล้ว +41

    Netflix might be plummeted
    But this one,
    Netflix did the right job.

  • @outlaws4justice417
    @outlaws4justice417 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Hilarious ! I love comedians I listen to a at least one a day because laughter is food for the soul.
    Thank you 😊

  • @tahjiawilliams8038
    @tahjiawilliams8038 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    Always loved this guy. I needed that laugh

  • @rokoVII
    @rokoVII 2 ปีที่แล้ว +80

    Ive seen these a million times, yet i laugh so hard everytime

  • @Farrahtinsley218
    @Farrahtinsley218 2 ปีที่แล้ว +40

    Tom cracking himself up cracked me up

  • @TheLonelyFoot
    @TheLonelyFoot 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    this man does the role of the comedian of speaking for the world perfectly

  • @ryanh1892
    @ryanh1892 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    11:22 "probably checked into 400 hotels this year" - dude out here needing more than 1 hotel per day for the entirety of the year

  • @FSMonster
    @FSMonster 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    First japanese comedian I have seen and heard. Super funny

  • @astrafalustre8259
    @astrafalustre8259 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    Very decent impersonation of Louis CK.

  • @ianmuri9171
    @ianmuri9171 2 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    Why am I picturing Zach Galifinakis as the bank dude? 😂

    • @johnwray393
      @johnwray393 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      That sounds about right. Definitely a movie style convo.

  • @prophetjones253
    @prophetjones253 2 ปีที่แล้ว +52

    I watched Brandon schaubs new special then I watched this, and you can clearly see the difference in a comedian and a guy just talking on stage laughing at his own life…… tommy is so funny

    • @zacharystecher3266
      @zacharystecher3266 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      He’s funny on like fight companions…when he has funny ppl on

    • @HipHopAn0n
      @HipHopAn0n 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@zacharystecher3266 I like Schaubs podcasts but his comedy is gaaaarbagio

    • @worldisfilledb
      @worldisfilledb 2 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Same with joe rogan, love the podcast but just not a proper comic

    • @thomasbowe9956
      @thomasbowe9956 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@worldisfilledb JR is so unfunny it's painful.

    • @steveocirinooo8703
      @steveocirinooo8703 ปีที่แล้ว

      Aaaaaa duh

  • @bbykay9126
    @bbykay9126 7 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

    The joke about the woman playing w herself almost made me pee .. that was funny asf

  • @dedexyz8475
    @dedexyz8475 2 ปีที่แล้ว +16

    Tom- the guy's a fucking "security guard" at a bank; CONSIDER the source always...and in this case, it was golden! LOVE your stuff!

  • @Simo258
    @Simo258 2 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    Tom, theo von, joey diaz and bill burr pull me outta the dark places i find myself in and make life worth living. Always make me laugh and make me forget about the dark clouds that linger over my head constantly x

  • @igorsilva3988
    @igorsilva3988 10 หลายเดือนก่อน

    This guy is incredible, he made me fall asleep within 10 min of the video.
    Best asmr on yt

  • @AncientCityMusic
    @AncientCityMusic 2 ปีที่แล้ว +35

    The impression of the old man on the plane makes me laugh every damn time (26:50)

  • @DillonColtMusic
    @DillonColtMusic 2 ปีที่แล้ว +40

    Tom is easily one of the best comedians working today.

  • @TheSweet_Chef
    @TheSweet_Chef ปีที่แล้ว +25

    Tom is hilarious 😂

  • @CristianBLeon
    @CristianBLeon 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    La salsa picante es lo mejor!

  • @InteristaS5
    @InteristaS5 2 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    “We’re gonna give you a free milkshake cause you’re bumming everybody out” 😂😂😂😂

  • @polehuggermusic
    @polehuggermusic ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I love this guy . We need laughter in this world right now and he's bringing it. If you're reading this all thank you

  • @MackyG-2020
    @MackyG-2020 2 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    My friend just sent me a text saying that I remind him of Tom Segura. So now im here. I'll definitely take that as a compliment.

  • @beaustine6093
    @beaustine6093 2 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    The baby in the theater bit was amazing lol. 😂

  • @Uvogreat
    @Uvogreat 5 หลายเดือนก่อน +13

    Tom said it best, "if you couldn't get a babysitter, YOU DON'T GET TO GO TO THE MOVIES". A lot of adults need to hear this more often.

  • @jonny555ive
    @jonny555ive 2 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    Tom is absolutely one of the best comics on the whole planet.
    Dude fukking slays 🤘🤘

  • @quinntonexecute
    @quinntonexecute 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    Segura is just naturally funny bro

  • @landseverywhere2155
    @landseverywhere2155 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    Either make it quiet or get it out! 😂

  • @rumnboats7612
    @rumnboats7612 2 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    Literally the best customer service quote ever "some people suck"

  • @sirtickleshitz
    @sirtickleshitz 2 ปีที่แล้ว +31

    This man gets the everyday man's plight with humorous narrative.

  • @DannGillen
    @DannGillen ปีที่แล้ว +1

    First timer here…an absolute immediate fan! So well done. Dangit, “book of stamps” made me spit out a perfectly good mouth of cigar smoke!

  • @regularnoah
    @regularnoah 2 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    he knows how to speak at the same understanding level and with the same desired outcome. a perfect formula

  • @lucian288
    @lucian288 2 ปีที่แล้ว +11

    23:24 I literally tried this and it indeed changed my life, I"m happier thanks Segura. And the parking one man that is fun to do.

  • @robb_inthe3213
    @robb_inthe3213 8 หลายเดือนก่อน +1

    She was flicking the ole bean! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

  • @DaemionBlackFire
    @DaemionBlackFire 2 ปีที่แล้ว +6

    I never saw this guy before but now he's my favorite current comedian