He may not have cheated but siding with a friend over his own wife and then inciting their common friends and family against her gave her enough of a reason not to consider reconciliation
I also wonder if the update at the end happened the other way around, where HE who was flirting with Fiona, and then she rejected him, and then he realized he threw away his life and marriage for nothing, and then came crawling back to OP. That would actually make even more sense
Even worse is that their friend group is siding with him too. Like, what the actual hell? Family is one thing, they're biased and (wrongly) think they have to be on his side out of loyalty, but shared friends should not have that kind of bias. But.. apparently they do. I bet they were never really OP's friends, they were her husband's friends, and just tolerated her because of him. In either case, no loss for OP to lose "friends" like that. Good riddance. I'd rather have no friends than fake friends.
@@mannydcbianco exactly!! OP also knows who the real friends are, and she needs new ones!🤷♀️ And the family, biased or not, but I would not take sides with family who does this, last year cut contact with my nephew who cheated on his fiance, after the fact we found out the cheating happend for months, no no, get out, you are no longer family just blood related
@@steph.v.o.7078 Completely agree. I am not big on the absurd family above all else mentality so many people seem to have. I will side with what I feel is right, not with blood relations or family ties. The "bUt FaMiLy" people tend to only make things worse; they will not rarely suppress the victims to protect the attackers, all in the name of FaMiLy, and saving face in the community.
@@mannydcbianco exactly, besides, you don't have a choice with family, you do with friends. And agree, the whole ✨️but family✨️ is just an excuse to poor behaviour, and saving face for the outside. I have, and never will protect toxic family members, they can go spread the toxicity somewhere else, but not around me or my husband and kids
The family is right. You don’t deserve a husband like him. You deserve some one who respects you and stands up for you. Not someone who is a piece of crap
Are you kidding me?! It took her basically throwing herself at him like a cheap hooker for him to realize what Fiona had been planning all along?! There's nothing wrong with being friends with someone of the opposite sex, but if you get with someone who has a friend that doesn't respect your relationship and think they should be the center of your partner's world--you need to keep it stepping.
Honestly I feel a little bit like it was a last ditch effort to win his wife over and he made that bit up. Lucky OP didn’t take him back because knowing him in a few months he would be besties with Fiona again!
People really need to spot the excuse of "She is like a sister\brother to me" because what matter was how Op's husband never had her back against her,not the strange relation between the two.
I never volunteered to sleep next to any of my siblings when they were depressed and I doubt I ever will. Like I would hold their hand until they fell asleep at the MOST. Even still if I was as old as these two I'd probably not do that much either lool
No, the husband is 1000% in the wrong since he would rather be in another woman’s bed instead of his wives. He’s putting another woman’s needs over his wives needs. It’s awful how he can just gaslight her like that
Facts. He can be as close as he wants with his friend, make her his cock world, go ahead Just don't date or marry another person if they're not going to become the proirity they should be
Even if he wasn't sleeping with her, chose that homewrecking slag that wasn't over him. This turned into a codependency issue that he let get out of control. Fiona is a disgusting manipulator that's willing to keep him from finding a healthy relationship with someone else.
Why would a grown ass man respect another woman more than his own wife? This isn't his mother it's a friend also op voiced her concerns and how she felt but he did absolutely nothing but brush her off and made excuses over and over again for his friend. @@Maninawig
I’m not fully defending him cuz he was kind of blind and stubborn when it comes to fiona however, I’m not surprised either because I know a lot of people who have been friends since they were kids and sometimes one can tend to defend that friend as it was a brother or sister without considering any consequences at the time…
@@yurionice1131 exactly. Let me rephrase. One could argue that hs has proven himself to be faithful with the devotion and loyalty he has shown to Fiona.... the only problem is he has given his faithfulness to the wrong woman.
Honestly its impressive how the Husband (or Ex Husband I guess) is so committed to stay married that he trys to turn the OP friends against her, has his family Harass her, tries to gaslight her and trys to stall the divorce but won't try fake cutting off the friend or even putting the friend in her place, its actually impressive how sad that is
"Sister" or not, no married man just sleeps in the same bed and room as them without people thinking that something is going on between them. Unless he was raised in an incestuous family, there is no other logical explanation of that being a sane thought. Even if she really was waking up from panic attacks, it's still not logical to share a room.
My brother doesn't even want to share a room with me and our sister when we plan our Vegas trip because and I quote "I love you guys we can have the rooms connected by a door but I don't want people getting a weird idea about us because we don't look like siblings and even if we did it still looks weird so I'm not sharing a room with you two." We told him "Well we want it to look like there's a man in the room because we don't want someone trying to break in and *do things* because there's two women in a room alone." We all agreed to the door connection and leaving it open 😂
The husband's family siding with Fiona is a huge red flag. Even though the husband realized Fiona was flirting with him and cut her off, his family supported her. This suggests his family might also be aware of Fiona's feelings.
Even if they had been actual siblings (as OP’s husband saw his best friend) his behavior would have been grounds for divorce. He never put OP first or put a stop to his friend’s abusive comments towards his wife.
Showed my husband this and he was absolutely disgusted with op husband. He just shock his head and told me weather she's a blood sister or not nobody but God is above your wife ❤ and that's why I love my husband of 27 years
What the actual F? So he's arguing that 1) she's like a sister to him, and 2) he needs to sleep in the same bed as her to comfort her if she has a panic attack. So he's saying it's normal for two adult siblings, a male and a female, to sleep in the same bed? That reeks of banjo music to me. That's not normal. Offering up a guest room but staying in separate rooms is the normal solution. There's no way her panic attacks are so severe he has to be right there in bed with her instead of in a different room. Really effing gross.
It is beyond all forms of comprehension that a man would believe he is appropriate and reasonable to not only move another woman into his marital home but to also move into the same bedroom with her while his wife smiles in agreement.
Yeah, that's the kicker. I know some people out there are capable of platonic intimacy with opposite-gender friends without something else happening, but in all of those cases, their partners knew about it, were totally okay with it, and were free to behave similarly with their friends (as part of a less traditional mindset). I can also believe that someone could genuinely feel only platonically about an opposite-gender friend and not realize it wasn't the same in reverse. However, even if the husband only had platonic feelings towards Fiona and was one for natural platonic intimacy, it doesn't excuse how he dismissed his wife and her concerns, and allowed Fiona to disrespect her. Heck, he shouldn't be letting any 'friend' disrespect his wife like that. Even if the husband and Fiona only had platonic feelings (ignoring Fiona's feelings), once the OP expressed discomfort, they should've respected her and acted accordingly.
@@zaramikazuki8374 Exactly. If the husband was so pure, platonic and nice he genuinely was worried about his friend he should at least been self aware enough to soothe his wife's fears, not dismiss them or listen to friend's assessments'. Like depending on people or strength of marriage both 'I don't think X is appropriate' or have established 'Please, I feel the need to help, but will swerve and pull back the second if it turns out to be a trap' and be nicer and understanding with the partner, and be open to make small sacrifices to make them feel secure, just you know not going too hard to the opposite when its unhealthy again.
A man's duty is to protect and defend his woman. So who was the woman when he belittled OP for commenting on Fiona's insults? Who was his woman when he demanded Fiona stand beside him in a white dress? Who was his woman when he defended Fiona for trashing OP's tastes? Who was his woman when he moved into the room without talking to his actual wife beforehand? And does she finally stop being his sister when he screws her to make her feel attractive?
People in this dynamic think it's ok because they've been in it for so long. But this is essentially a committed, long-term emotional relationship that has existed since childhood and the wife was always going to be the other woman/third wheel.
Cheating doesn't have to be physical. It can be emotional. OP's husband was doing exactly that, and Fiona reveled in it. OP deserves better. WAY better.
He must really feel stupid when he saw Fiona so fast leaving for her parents and thinking of all the times he fought so hard, that Fiona could not live with them😂
I don't even think the best friend is infertile, no way she wld be happy in her marriage when her first love is genuinely happy with someone else. I think she divorced her husband, made up a lie for the reason and made her now exhusband out to be a bad guy, pretended to be inconsolable etc, as a last ditch effort to push op out and into op's husband's heart by playing victim.
Actually yes. Miracle baby after she tries to 'console' him about pain of the wife leaving, and of course no condoms, does seem like something that would slot nicely into the Master Plan or ten
You know I'm still blown away that there are people out there who would hear the circumstances as to why they're getting divorced you know you're at fault because you're not okay with him comforting her at night by sleeping in the same room possibly the same bed with her that's on you not on them like that just blows my mind
What kind of sick twisted upbringing did this guy have? "She's like a sister to me, of course I'll sleep in her bed to keep her from getting a panic attack." WTAF?!
Yeah you’re right. If this story is real I think he was moving her to to try and start a harem and hoping OP had enough of a noodle spine to just tolerate it and got upset when she laid down the law and realized not only was it not working but she was leaving him.
Ugh, I have panic attacks and I would never ever begin to insult and disrespect my husband by asking if I could sleep in the same room with my male bestie. And I have a male bestie. But our relationship is legitimately harmless. Fiona and the hubby here are trash. You know what you should do if you need comfort in the middle of the night? Set up security cams so you put the wife's mind at ease, and get walkie talkies so you can radio your friend and ask him to meet you at the kitchen table. Or meet you in your room with the CAMERAS on so wifey knows. Wifey may not even look at the footage but offering to install cameras is just polite and puts her mind at ease. It's HER home, her castle. How dare they for real
Im so so so glad she didnt take him back in the end. Its great that he was honest about his feelings, but thats not the reason for the divorce. It was the insults and boundary stomping, even if she was a bio sister, he should have had more respect for his wife's feelings and no brush off her behavior as op being jealous. Op deserves better
If he's so insistent on calling her "like a sister" then I'd tell him that I don't feel like being the third wheel hanging around watching their emotional incest. Because he was in all ways except physically (as far as we know) more married to Fiona than OP when they were all living together. I don't blame her for not wanting to feel like she was the unwelcomed one in her own home.
Why the hell didn't he just marry Fiona in the first damn place? I mean as soon as Fiona said I was the 3rd woman in his life, I would've noped the hell out. OP wanted her husband and allowed herself to be mistreated. She walked into this situation with her eyes open. Hard to feel sorry for her.
im going to go out on a limb and say fiona knew she couldent have kids and so did OPs husband. im thinking they've been banging for a while and since she never got knocked up, they knew. he got with OP to have kids and fiona tried to trap her husband in a marriage when she knew she couldent have kids and he would just accept it while OPs husband and fiona were still having their fun on the side. i remember a story of cousins who were more than cousins and they got married to other people to have kids, soon as they found out she was unable to have kids they ran away together and told their spouses it was over and they were getting divorces.
Probably because it was Fiona who has said it, with history of being destructive, possessive chaos goblin and all, not her husband or in the presence of him
i love how oblivious dudes can be. Shes upset about her breakup, moves into his house, convinces him to sleep in the same bed with her and hes shocked when he finds out she was trying to seduce him.
I kept saying it and I was right. Sure he says he doesn’t see Fiona as anything more than a friend or sister but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t see him as more. Also with him putting off the comments on OP’s clothes and makeup and not even defending OP. I bet even if the OP had let them share the room Fiona would have tried something.
Yeah, you parried several bullets with this one. However, for the best of your mental health, don't allow anything more than just friends to ex-husband. He is toxic and awful person.
There was no reason to move his clothes into the guest room, he was having an affair and now the money has gone he is trying to get back with OP. I'm expecting her to write that he got her back and now Fiona is back. She needs to go no contact and stay no contact with her ex, he knows all the moves to manipulate her.
Never trust men with girl best friends, unless that girl best friend actively shows you that she isn’t a threat to your relationship. The biggest thing to look out for is if your man’s girl best friend has no interest in befriending you. ACTUAL best friends would want to get to know you since you’re dating one of their friend. Some girl best friends are extremely genuine, kind, and have no interest in your partner whatsoever, but most of them are little snakes who will weasel their way between you and your partner any chance they get 🙄
"He can't believe I was throwing away the marriage over something so petty." This is the most infuriating form of gaslighting to me, because it's either being willfully ignorant and gaslighting, or genuinely that oblivious and stupid. It's never just one thing, it's always a build-up of issues, and anyone with half a brain cell would recognize that.
The last time I slept in my actual brothers bed was when I was 19 and just had the biggest mental breakdown of my life. I had spent I think more than 2 hours sobbing in this arms and couldn't sleep alone, so I slept and spent the full next day in his bed. It would have been a bit wierd in any other context (to me at least, I wouldn't have been comfortable), but to sleep in your not-blood sister's bed when you're a man is another kind of wierd. I'm glad he finally saw the light but it already was way too late.
My best friend, who I have been friends with for 20 years, have lived with and consider family, is exactly that, my friend. Even as close as we are, there has always been a boundry on that, just as if we where brother and sister.
Remember guys u dont just marry the person but also there entourage if he or she has a friend that clearly has a distaste for u ,clearly insults u and he never defended u or took a stand for u than that person will countinur making ur life hell As life partners it should be u and him vs life not life and him vs u
Story 1, Op honey some of us have been in your place but you finally came to your senses, it is a good thing, but DONT GO BACK DONT GO BACK, he betrayed your vows and brought in flying monkeys to insult you, belittle you drop them too along with his family, dont remain friend with no one who try to guilt you, go seek some therapy if YOU feel like it will help you to overcome this but, you need to cut contact with your ex, you two don't have kids so clean slate, you will never get over this betrayal if you don't cut him out of your life, forgot he ever existed for your mental health
My gosh, that ex-husband ... my only question right now is why his nose is not as long as the Golden Gate Bridge with all the lies and manipulation he had said to OP throughout their relationship. Even with that last update, I have zero sympathy. He chose to make this bed, and now he's crying about lying in a bed made of thorns rather than roses.
People need to stop with the "they're like my sister/brother" BS excuse. Yes, it is possible for someone to view another person as only a sibling. However, that's just you. How do you know the other person thinks the same thing? Fiona was clearly jealous, and tried putting OP down, in ways someone wouldn't do to their brother's girl. It's clear that she didn't think of OP's ex as a brother. "I think of her like a sister", okay but she doesn't think that way about you, lmao, and that's a problem. Good job, he destroyed his marriage with his own stupidity.
'everyone hates you for leaving over something like this. But as the nicest guy I stopped them from coming to communicate in person because I respected your choice'. Manipulation by threatening destruction of reputation and public opinion, but put himself to be perceived as a defender standing between the wife and all the close ties he severed. Because people who shake in their boots and almost prefer other terrors are aplenty. Layed groundwork to subtly dissuade her from speaking to anyone in calm and vulnerable environment, so not to expose his lies before they could be cemented. Also not stopped anyone from one-sidedly harassing her elsewhere, even made sure every single person they both knew would do a heelturn so the prior statement became far more brittle.
Ex husband making a promise that they’re just siblings dosent make it less stupid to move in with his female friend and believing nothing will happen. Riiiiiight
As someone with severe panic attacks, i would never expect my bestie (who's a bloke) to do anything other than bury me in a pillow and blanket pile, tell me it's okay, that im an idiot and he'll be back with pizza. If he had a gf I'd expect him to drop a message saying he's going to be late because of my dumb ass, not put me up in his home or sleep in my bed.
Even though he may have thought of her as a sister the thing is he still chose her over you at least 3 times(every time) which for me 1 would have been to many.
As someone with panic attacks I would never ask my married guy friend to sleep in the same room as me. That’s not normal. Also it’s not like Fiona made an effort to actually be nice to the wife and be friends this would be completely different. It wouldn’t be ok either way though and it’s just fucking weird
How was it low and disgusting of Eddy to leave this Fiona. Clearly OP should've practiced minded her own business and prioritized what was on her plate.
Oh, we need more men like this! Because clearly, females have been telling us its okay to have a best friend of the opposite gender and have no boundaries with them and males shouldn't be jealous about it. Sure, okay, you can a friend of the opposite gender, and you can alsovtry to gasliggt us into thinking we are really wrong for seeing a problem with this. But every man has to have a "female best friend" too
Dude the whole story sounded like the script of a Manhwa (Korean comic/manga/story), the genre that is popular, the type: infidelity, female main character strong, the female friend of the husband who is manipulative and evil and wants the husband to be her husband, but when the husband has a change of heart it's like another kind of manhwa the reborn kind where after he realizes his mistakes and lives miserably he goes back in time after seeing that the person he defended is a devil on earth and after going back in time he gets rid of the devil and tries to reconcile with his wife
If there where any more red flags you'd be able to see them from another galaxy. The red flags where there at the begining, OP just didn't see them or refused to acknowledge them (the latter I'm guessing is probably the case). Why would the husband even begin to think it would be ok to share a room with another woman, regardless if they're friends.
it's like the case of fighting with your parents coz they keep telling you that you have bad friends and you run away believing that you're in the right and everyone is blind. maybe he's living his teenage friendship vs family except it's his wife lol too late for that man
I would still dangle the offer over his head, your friendship or your marriage, which would you rather suffer the loss of in which one can you genuinely not do without more?
I guess that’s why you shouldn’t marry at 25 with someone you met at 22. I feel like people marry even before they get to know THEMSELVES. How can you be sure of any other person when you’re still figuring out who YOU are?
I was watching a different video yesterday with similar circumstances but the outcome was way better and ended with talking things out. Awesome sauce in my book.
Its low and disgusting of a man to leave a woman because she can't have kids and he want's to start a family? No not at all that's called wanting to have your own family and its pretty normal. Plus its not like they were together for 10 years.
I’m the most cynical person usually, but this is a sad story. The wife is incredibly insecure, the husband is incredibly naive. The husband wouldn’t abandon his friend, because he viewed her as a sister. The primer to understanding his thought processes’ is - would you abandon a sibling going through a hard time just because your spouse wanted you to? Most normal-thinking people would say no.
I believe there is more to this story. On another Reddit story time, he actually sleeps with Fiona and they move on to get married. OP is destroyed but cleans his clock in the divorce. Everyone shuns Fiona and her ex and I think they move away. Idk if this part is added on for drama just saying there are other parts out there….
I always want to tell people who have this type of male or female best friend, “I hope you realize, if in the end you don’t want to date and marry this ‘friend’ you better get used to being single. Your lack of boundaries with this person will destroy any and all relationships you will ever have.” Edit to add: I don’t believe for even a second they told all those people harassing op the truth about why they were getting kicked out. She should also tell him, “I’m not divorcing you because you cheated, I’m divorcing you because you CONSTANTLY cross my boundaries. I’m telling you I’m not ok with what you’re doing and you’ve decided you don’t care. This is the consequence of that. I deserve someone who respects my boundaries. Besides, you would NEVER be okay with me sleeping with another man because he’s sad.”
Even if he Fiona are platonic he still chose her over his wife and that’s so wrong and if Fiona was a true friend to him when she saw what it was doing to his marriage she would have stepped back stayed friends but with some distance and real brothers and sisters don’t do what he and Fiona were doing and insecure or not his wife’s prospective Of what was happening and how it made her feel should have been his first priority no question about it
Dude is a special kind of idiot. Whether or not he knew Fiona wanted him, he still allowed her to disrespect his wife and their marriage.
He may not have cheated but siding with a friend over his own wife and then inciting their common friends and family against her gave her enough of a reason not to consider reconciliation
Cause dude isn't real
I also wonder if the update at the end happened the other way around, where HE who was flirting with Fiona, and then she rejected him, and then he realized he threw away his life and marriage for nothing, and then came crawling back to OP. That would actually make even more sense
@@IntegralKing
That's probably what happened and he told op a different story
My thoughts exactly. He may be blaming Fiona but ultimately he CHOSE the toxic friendship over his marriage.
"I'm gonna live and sleep in the same bed as her, but it's clearly platonic!" Sure, bud. You keep telling yourself that.
Baby, yes we had sex but she needed sexual relief, nothing more than that!
Where did you heard that they gonna sleep in the same bed? Because it's clearly told that they'll sleep in the same ROOM
@@daigos_heir he was moving his stuff into the bedroom. Trust me he wouldn't have been sleeping on the floor
@@daigos_heir So much naivety, what you think he would have done after she fakes a panic attack in order to get him into bed to "feel safe"?
A month later: "I only screwed her to remind her how sexualIy desirable she is, but it means nothing cause she's my sister!"
The fact that the whole family is siding with the husband is also a huge red flag!!
Even worse is that their friend group is siding with him too. Like, what the actual hell? Family is one thing, they're biased and (wrongly) think they have to be on his side out of loyalty, but shared friends should not have that kind of bias. But.. apparently they do. I bet they were never really OP's friends, they were her husband's friends, and just tolerated her because of him. In either case, no loss for OP to lose "friends" like that. Good riddance. I'd rather have no friends than fake friends.
@@mannydcbianco exactly!! OP also knows who the real friends are, and she needs new ones!🤷♀️
And the family, biased or not, but I would not take sides with family who does this, last year cut contact with my nephew who cheated on his fiance, after the fact we found out the cheating happend for months, no no, get out, you are no longer family just blood related
It's possible he fed them all a bunch of lies in with the rest.
@@steph.v.o.7078 Completely agree. I am not big on the absurd family above all else mentality so many people seem to have. I will side with what I feel is right, not with blood relations or family ties. The "bUt FaMiLy" people tend to only make things worse; they will not rarely suppress the victims to protect the attackers, all in the name of FaMiLy, and saving face in the community.
@@mannydcbianco exactly, besides, you don't have a choice with family, you do with friends. And agree, the whole ✨️but family✨️ is just an excuse to poor behaviour, and saving face for the outside.
I have, and never will protect toxic family members, they can go spread the toxicity somewhere else, but not around me or my husband and kids
The family is right. You don’t deserve a husband like him. You deserve some one who respects you and stands up for you. Not someone who is a piece of crap
Are you kidding me?! It took her basically throwing herself at him like a cheap hooker for him to realize what Fiona had been planning all along?! There's nothing wrong with being friends with someone of the opposite sex, but if you get with someone who has a friend that doesn't respect your relationship and think they should be the center of your partner's world--you need to keep it stepping.
Honestly I feel a little bit like it was a last ditch effort to win his wife over and he made that bit up. Lucky OP didn’t take him back because knowing him in a few months he would be besties with Fiona again!
People really need to spot the excuse of "She is like a sister\brother to me" because what matter was how Op's husband never had her back against her,not the strange relation between the two.
Besides, it makes it all the weirder that they'd wanna f*ck each other.
Don't forget my play cousin. Lol!😂😂😂 That's definitely code for side piece.
Or they’re just an online friend.
I never volunteered to sleep next to any of my siblings when they were depressed and I doubt I ever will. Like I would hold their hand until they fell asleep at the MOST. Even still if I was as old as these two I'd probably not do that much either lool
No, the husband is 1000% in the wrong since he would rather be in another woman’s bed instead of his wives. He’s putting another woman’s needs over his wives needs. It’s awful how he can just gaslight her like that
Facts.
He can be as close as he wants with his friend, make her his cock world, go ahead
Just don't date or marry another person if they're not going to become the proirity they should be
Wives? It's wife for singular
His refusal to turn his back on Fiona as a show of Fidelity is proof of his unfaithfulness.
Or that he was faithful to the other woman
Even if he wasn't sleeping with her, chose that homewrecking slag that wasn't over him. This turned into a codependency issue that he let get out of control. Fiona is a disgusting manipulator that's willing to keep him from finding a healthy relationship with someone else.
Why would a grown ass man respect another woman more than his own wife? This isn't his mother it's a friend also op voiced her concerns and how she felt but he did absolutely nothing but brush her off and made excuses over and over again for his friend. @@Maninawig
I’m not fully defending him cuz he was kind of blind and stubborn when it comes to fiona however, I’m not surprised either because I know a lot of people who have been friends since they were kids and sometimes one can tend to defend that friend as it was a brother or sister without considering any consequences at the time…
@@yurionice1131 exactly.
Let me rephrase. One could argue that hs has proven himself to be faithful with the devotion and loyalty he has shown to Fiona.... the only problem is he has given his faithfulness to the wrong woman.
Honestly its impressive how the Husband (or Ex Husband I guess) is so committed to stay married that he trys to turn the OP friends against her, has his family Harass her, tries to gaslight her and trys to stall the divorce but won't try fake cutting off the friend or even putting the friend in her place, its actually impressive how sad that is
"Sister" or not, no married man just sleeps in the same bed and room as them without people thinking that something is going on between them. Unless he was raised in an incestuous family, there is no other logical explanation of that being a sane thought. Even if she really was waking up from panic attacks, it's still not logical to share a room.
My brother doesn't even want to share a room with me and our sister when we plan our Vegas trip because and I quote "I love you guys we can have the rooms connected by a door but I don't want people getting a weird idea about us because we don't look like siblings and even if we did it still looks weird so I'm not sharing a room with you two." We told him "Well we want it to look like there's a man in the room because we don't want someone trying to break in and *do things* because there's two women in a room alone." We all agreed to the door connection and leaving it open 😂
The husband's family siding with Fiona is a huge red flag. Even though the husband realized Fiona was flirting with him and cut her off, his family supported her. This suggests his family might also be aware of Fiona's feelings.
Yeah they probably wanted him to get with Fiona
Even if they had been actual siblings (as OP’s husband saw his best friend) his behavior would have been grounds for divorce. He never put OP first or put a stop to his friend’s abusive comments towards his wife.
I am so glad that I never got the chance to marry my ex with a female "best friend"... it would have absolutely ended in divorce.
Showed my husband this and he was absolutely disgusted with op husband. He just shock his head and told me weather she's a blood sister or not nobody but God is above your wife ❤ and that's why I love my husband of 27 years
What the actual F? So he's arguing that 1) she's like a sister to him, and 2) he needs to sleep in the same bed as her to comfort her if she has a panic attack. So he's saying it's normal for two adult siblings, a male and a female, to sleep in the same bed? That reeks of banjo music to me. That's not normal. Offering up a guest room but staying in separate rooms is the normal solution. There's no way her panic attacks are so severe he has to be right there in bed with her instead of in a different room. Really effing gross.
i thought the same! "we are just like siblings to each other" thing makes it worse...
I don't even think her "panic attacks" are real. It was just a ploy to get him into her bed, and it worked because he's a dumb f.
REEKS OF BANJO MUSIC I CAN’T 💀😭
My brother doesn't even want to share a hotel room with us 😂
The amount of red flags the OP ignored is absurd
It is beyond all forms of comprehension that a man would believe he is appropriate and reasonable to not only move another woman into his marital home but to also move into the same bedroom with her while his wife smiles in agreement.
She should've asked if he was OK with her sleeping on the same bed as one of her male besties. If not, then why was he such a hypocrite?
Exactly 😂
Yeah, that's the kicker. I know some people out there are capable of platonic intimacy with opposite-gender friends without something else happening, but in all of those cases, their partners knew about it, were totally okay with it, and were free to behave similarly with their friends (as part of a less traditional mindset). I can also believe that someone could genuinely feel only platonically about an opposite-gender friend and not realize it wasn't the same in reverse.
However, even if the husband only had platonic feelings towards Fiona and was one for natural platonic intimacy, it doesn't excuse how he dismissed his wife and her concerns, and allowed Fiona to disrespect her. Heck, he shouldn't be letting any 'friend' disrespect his wife like that. Even if the husband and Fiona only had platonic feelings (ignoring Fiona's feelings), once the OP expressed discomfort, they should've respected her and acted accordingly.
@@zaramikazuki8374 Exactly. If the husband was so pure, platonic and nice he genuinely was worried about his friend he should at least been self aware enough to soothe his wife's fears, not dismiss them or listen to friend's assessments'. Like depending on people or strength of marriage both 'I don't think X is appropriate' or have established 'Please, I feel the need to help, but will swerve and pull back the second if it turns out to be a trap' and be nicer and understanding with the partner, and be open to make small sacrifices to make them feel secure, just you know not going too hard to the opposite when its unhealthy again.
He'd just argue that she didn't know her friend as long as he knew Fiona
You know he would be absolutely pissed if that was the case 💀
A man's duty is to protect and defend his woman.
So who was the woman when he belittled OP for commenting on Fiona's insults?
Who was his woman when he demanded Fiona stand beside him in a white dress?
Who was his woman when he defended Fiona for trashing OP's tastes?
Who was his woman when he moved into the room without talking to his actual wife beforehand?
And does she finally stop being his sister when he screws her to make her feel attractive?
This comment is worded beautifully!
People in this dynamic think it's ok because they've been in it for so long. But this is essentially a committed, long-term emotional relationship that has existed since childhood and the wife was always going to be the other woman/third wheel.
Cheating doesn't have to be physical. It can be emotional. OP's husband was doing exactly that, and Fiona reveled in it. OP deserves better. WAY better.
He must really feel stupid when he saw Fiona so fast leaving for her parents and thinking of all the times he fought so hard, that Fiona could not live with them😂
“she’s like a sister to me”
*sweet home alabama playing in background*
I don't even think the best friend is infertile, no way she wld be happy in her marriage when her first love is genuinely happy with someone else. I think she divorced her husband, made up a lie for the reason and made her now exhusband out to be a bad guy, pretended to be inconsolable etc, as a last ditch effort to push op out and into op's husband's heart by playing victim.
Actually yes. Miracle baby after she tries to 'console' him about pain of the wife leaving, and of course no condoms, does seem like something that would slot nicely into the Master Plan or ten
You know I'm still blown away that there are people out there who would hear the circumstances as to why they're getting divorced you know you're at fault because you're not okay with him comforting her at night by sleeping in the same room possibly the same bed with her that's on you not on them like that just blows my mind
What kind of sick twisted upbringing did this guy have? "She's like a sister to me, of course I'll sleep in her bed to keep her from getting a panic attack." WTAF?!
Yeah you’re right. If this story is real I think he was moving her to to try and start a harem and hoping OP had enough of a noodle spine to just tolerate it and got upset when she laid down the law and realized not only was it not working but she was leaving him.
Fiona is the pick me that didn't get picked first, and never got over it
Ugh, I have panic attacks and I would never ever begin to insult and disrespect my husband by asking if I could sleep in the same room with my male bestie. And I have a male bestie. But our relationship is legitimately harmless. Fiona and the hubby here are trash. You know what you should do if you need comfort in the middle of the night? Set up security cams so you put the wife's mind at ease, and get walkie talkies so you can radio your friend and ask him to meet you at the kitchen table. Or meet you in your room with the CAMERAS on so wifey knows. Wifey may not even look at the footage but offering to install cameras is just polite and puts her mind at ease. It's HER home, her castle. How dare they for real
Why did he need his stuff in her room? Y'all could keep the doors open. He is never going to have a healthy relationship with any woman.
Never heard of a platonic brother-sister love that involved sleeping together.
Man was trying to legalise cheating
Im so so so glad she didnt take him back in the end. Its great that he was honest about his feelings, but thats not the reason for the divorce. It was the insults and boundary stomping, even if she was a bio sister, he should have had more respect for his wife's feelings and no brush off her behavior as op being jealous. Op deserves better
If he's so insistent on calling her "like a sister" then I'd tell him that I don't feel like being the third wheel hanging around watching their emotional incest. Because he was in all ways except physically (as far as we know) more married to Fiona than OP when they were all living together. I don't blame her for not wanting to feel like she was the unwelcomed one in her own home.
Panicked attacked my ass. Only a person born yesterday will believed their actions. Apologised my ass.lol
Never be with a guy with a female best friend…..NEVER.
Why the hell didn't he just marry Fiona in the first damn place? I mean as soon as Fiona said I was the 3rd woman in his life, I would've noped the hell out. OP wanted her husband and allowed herself to be mistreated. She walked into this situation with her eyes open. Hard to feel sorry for her.
I mean, he apparently was honest when he said he viewed her like a sister.
@@darklordsatan4383sweet home Alabama
im going to go out on a limb and say fiona knew she couldent have kids and so did OPs husband. im thinking they've been banging for a while and since she never got knocked up, they knew. he got with OP to have kids and fiona tried to trap her husband in a marriage when she knew she couldent have kids and he would just accept it while OPs husband and fiona were still having their fun on the side. i remember a story of cousins who were more than cousins and they got married to other people to have kids, soon as they found out she was unable to have kids they ran away together and told their spouses it was over and they were getting divorces.
Probably because it was Fiona who has said it, with history of being destructive, possessive chaos goblin and all, not her husband or in the presence of him
Never heard of a platonic brother-sister love that involved sleeping together.
Start packing again 😭😂😂😂
Bro picked his friendship over his marriage, 1000% his fault
i love how oblivious dudes can be. Shes upset about her breakup, moves into his house, convinces him to sleep in the same bed with her and hes shocked when he finds out she was trying to seduce him.
Was kinda expecting that after the divorce, the husband would get with Fiona because he secretly did have feelings for her but guess not
Even if he didnt have any sexual relations with fiona he was 100% emotionally cheating.
she is like a sister to him well sweet home Alabama
The only way a person can change is by building a new life for themself, and not interacting with old friends, etc.
I kept saying it and I was right. Sure he says he doesn’t see Fiona as anything more than a friend or sister but that doesn’t mean she doesn’t see him as more. Also with him putting off the comments on OP’s clothes and makeup and not even defending OP. I bet even if the OP had let them share the room Fiona would have tried something.
Yeah, you parried several bullets with this one. However, for the best of your mental health, don't allow anything more than just friends to ex-husband. He is toxic and awful person.
There was no reason to move his clothes into the guest room, he was having an affair and now the money has gone he is trying to get back with OP. I'm expecting her to write that he got her back and now Fiona is back. She needs to go no contact and stay no contact with her ex, he knows all the moves to manipulate her.
Never trust men with girl best friends, unless that girl best friend actively shows you that she isn’t a threat to your relationship. The biggest thing to look out for is if your man’s girl best friend has no interest in befriending you. ACTUAL best friends would want to get to know you since you’re dating one of their friend. Some girl best friends are extremely genuine, kind, and have no interest in your partner whatsoever, but most of them are little snakes who will weasel their way between you and your partner any chance they get 🙄
I didn't see that ending coming. The fact that the Ex as that blinded about his childhood friend was crazy to me
"He can't believe I was throwing away the marriage over something so petty."
This is the most infuriating form of gaslighting to me, because it's either being willfully ignorant and gaslighting, or genuinely that oblivious and stupid. It's never just one thing, it's always a build-up of issues, and anyone with half a brain cell would recognize that.
The last time I slept in my actual brothers bed was when I was 19 and just had the biggest mental breakdown of my life. I had spent I think more than 2 hours sobbing in this arms and couldn't sleep alone, so I slept and spent the full next day in his bed.
It would have been a bit wierd in any other context (to me at least, I wouldn't have been comfortable), but to sleep in your not-blood sister's bed when you're a man is another kind of wierd. I'm glad he finally saw the light but it already was way too late.
Idk if I can finish this. This finna make me livid.
Yeah. I barely made it outta this one. One of the worst reddit stories I ever read.
@@genuinelypink3838 Yea… still don’t plan on finishing.
"She was the siibling he/she never had'' has a nice ring to it...
Whenever the husband/boyfriend is willing to look the other way while their “female best friend” belittle their partner, it’s a huge red flag.
My best friend, who I have been friends with for 20 years, have lived with and consider family, is exactly that, my friend. Even as close as we are, there has always been a boundry on that, just as if we where brother and sister.
Remember guys u dont just marry the person but also there entourage if he or she has a friend that clearly has a distaste for u ,clearly insults u and he never defended u or took a stand for u than that person will countinur making ur life hell
As life partners it should be u and him vs life not life and him vs u
Im gonna chalk this one up on the, "Salvageable" side of the board, amicable divorce, good feelings, possible friendship
Dude moved his mistress in and the wife tolerated it for two weeks! How can anyone be so blind and weak to allow that?!
Story 1, Op honey some of us have been in your place but you finally came to your senses, it is a good thing, but DONT GO BACK DONT GO BACK, he betrayed your vows and brought in flying monkeys to insult you, belittle you drop them too along with his family, dont remain friend with no one who try to guilt you, go seek some therapy if YOU feel like it will help you to overcome this but, you need to cut contact with your ex, you two don't have kids so clean slate, you will never get over this betrayal if you don't cut him out of your life, forgot he ever existed for your mental health
My gosh, that ex-husband ... my only question right now is why his nose is not as long as the Golden Gate Bridge with all the lies and manipulation he had said to OP throughout their relationship. Even with that last update, I have zero sympathy. He chose to make this bed, and now he's crying about lying in a bed made of thorns rather than roses.
People need to stop with the "they're like my sister/brother" BS excuse.
Yes, it is possible for someone to view another person as only a sibling. However, that's just you. How do you know the other person thinks the same thing?
Fiona was clearly jealous, and tried putting OP down, in ways someone wouldn't do to their brother's girl. It's clear that she didn't think of OP's ex as a brother. "I think of her like a sister", okay but she doesn't think that way about you, lmao, and that's a problem.
Good job, he destroyed his marriage with his own stupidity.
'everyone hates you for leaving over something like this. But as the nicest guy I stopped them from coming to communicate in person because I respected your choice'. Manipulation by threatening destruction of reputation and public opinion, but put himself to be perceived as a defender standing between the wife and all the close ties he severed. Because people who shake in their boots and almost prefer other terrors are aplenty. Layed groundwork to subtly dissuade her from speaking to anyone in calm and vulnerable environment, so not to expose his lies before they could be cemented. Also not stopped anyone from one-sidedly harassing her elsewhere, even made sure every single person they both knew would do a heelturn so the prior statement became far more brittle.
For every remark i would clap back. How come ppl just cannot see so many red flags?
My ex said the same about one of his female friends. Yeah, nta. Take out that piece of trash and let m go.
Ex husband making a promise that they’re just siblings dosent make it less stupid to move in with his female friend and believing nothing will happen. Riiiiiight
I think the husband lied when he told OP that story about Fiona's advances in the last update. Dude's still trynna have his cake and eat it too.
“She is like a sister”
Yah like a sister not a sister
As someone with severe panic attacks, i would never expect my bestie (who's a bloke) to do anything other than bury me in a pillow and blanket pile, tell me it's okay, that im an idiot and he'll be back with pizza. If he had a gf I'd expect him to drop a message saying he's going to be late because of my dumb ass, not put me up in his home or sleep in my bed.
Even though he may have thought of her as a sister the thing is he still chose her over you at least 3 times(every time) which for me 1 would have been to many.
He knew whatever going on but acted innocent at last
Like his bff had said before you are the third woman in his life
Imagine op's husband seeing this post and the comments here, literal slap in the face
okay but even if it was only platonic and "she's like a sister" it's still ops choice to say that she doesn't want to deal with that relationship
panic attack: 'it's all about meeeeeeeeee'. it is not pleasant. but far too many I hae observed use it as a manipulation tool
As someone with panic attacks I would never ask my married guy friend to sleep in the same room as me. That’s not normal. Also it’s not like Fiona made an effort to actually be nice to the wife and be friends this would be completely different. It wouldn’t be ok either way though and it’s just fucking weird
How was it low and disgusting of Eddy to leave this Fiona. Clearly OP should've practiced minded her own business and prioritized what was on her plate.
Oh, we need more men like this! Because clearly, females have been telling us its okay to have a best friend of the opposite gender and have no boundaries with them and males shouldn't be jealous about it. Sure, okay, you can a friend of the opposite gender, and you can alsovtry to gasliggt us into thinking we are really wrong for seeing a problem with this. But every man has to have a "female best friend" too
wouldnt be surprised is fiona were to overexaggerate/fake the severity of those panic attacks
truth is you cannot just kick them out. they need to be evicted.
divorce him and run for your life
Dude the whole story sounded like the script of a Manhwa (Korean comic/manga/story), the genre that is popular, the type: infidelity, female main character strong, the female friend of the husband who is manipulative and evil and wants the husband to be her husband, but when the husband has a change of heart it's like another kind of manhwa the reborn kind where after he realizes his mistakes and lives miserably he goes back in time after seeing that the person he defended is a devil on earth and after going back in time he gets rid of the devil and tries to reconcile with his wife
If there where any more red flags you'd be able to see them from another galaxy. The red flags where there at the begining, OP just didn't see them or refused to acknowledge them (the latter I'm guessing is probably the case). Why would the husband even begin to think it would be ok to share a room with another woman, regardless if they're friends.
"I'll share a bed with her for both living and sleeping, but it's strictly platonic!" Oh, sure, buddy. Whatever helps you sleep at night.
Did he also make Fiona an art room? I joke. OP should have noped out of that relationship long before matrimony.
What about Fiona's panic attacks? 😂 Is his mom helping her with them?
"She's just a friend! She's like a sister to me! You're the only one I love!"
Okay but what about her feelings? Have you considered that?
it's like the case of fighting with your parents coz they keep telling you that you have bad friends and you run away believing that you're in the right and everyone is blind. maybe he's living his teenage friendship vs family except it's his wife lol too late for that man
I would still dangle the offer over his head, your friendship or your marriage, which would you rather suffer the loss of in which one can you genuinely not do without more?
That would not work, because even if he chose the marriage, he would be bitter about the choice and towards her.
I guess that’s why you shouldn’t marry at 25 with someone you met at 22. I feel like people marry even before they get to know THEMSELVES. How can you be sure of any other person when you’re still figuring out who YOU are?
I was watching a different video yesterday with similar circumstances but the outcome was way better and ended with talking things out. Awesome sauce in my book.
Its low and disgusting of a man to leave a woman because she can't have kids and he want's to start a family? No not at all that's called wanting to have your own family and its pretty normal. Plus its not like they were together for 10 years.
Oh hell no!! Your not wrong
Let him marry Fiona.
even if it was his sister. moving into her room is weird
I’m the most cynical person usually, but this is a sad story. The wife is incredibly insecure, the husband is incredibly naive. The husband wouldn’t abandon his friend, because he viewed her as a sister. The primer to understanding his thought processes’ is - would you abandon a sibling going through a hard time just because your spouse wanted you to? Most normal-thinking people would say no.
I believe there is more to this story. On another Reddit story time, he actually sleeps with Fiona and they move on to get married. OP is destroyed but cleans his clock in the divorce. Everyone shuns Fiona and her ex and I think they move away.
Idk if this part is added on for drama just saying there are other parts out there….
There's "do it for Dan", and "do it for Fiona", two special kinds of crazy
I always want to tell people who have this type of male or female best friend, “I hope you realize, if in the end you don’t want to date and marry this ‘friend’ you better get used to being single. Your lack of boundaries with this person will destroy any and all relationships you will ever have.”
Edit to add: I don’t believe for even a second they told all those people harassing op the truth about why they were getting kicked out. She should also tell him, “I’m not divorcing you because you cheated, I’m divorcing you because you CONSTANTLY cross my boundaries. I’m telling you I’m not ok with what you’re doing and you’ve decided you don’t care. This is the consequence of that. I deserve someone who respects my boundaries. Besides, you would NEVER be okay with me sleeping with another man because he’s sad.”
😮 like siblings? What kinda backwoods relationship is he into?!?
"I love her like a sister" "its platonic"
Nope, that's called ✨️incest✨️
Even if he Fiona are platonic he still chose her over his wife and that’s so wrong and if Fiona was a true friend to him when she saw what it was doing to his marriage she would have stepped back stayed friends but with some distance and real brothers and sisters don’t do what he and Fiona were doing and insecure or not his wife’s prospective
Of what was happening and how it made her feel should have been his first priority no question about it