hi Susie I been mentaly torture bye my ex for 4 years of and on I caught him out tonight he got a bird in his place and they are both drugies !!!now I am free and I can start my life plus j change my no to the night mare of my ex narsicist has gone free free !!!!
When a coworker took in her elderly mom and two aunts, she said, "I've noticed that people just become more like themselves as they get older". Fortunately her mom and aunts were nice people. Unfortunately, this also applies to narcs and their ilk.
C.S. Lewis termed it "quiddity." I'm not sure that's the word's original meaning, but Lewis used it to mean that everyone is indeed becoming more and more what he or she actually is. Permit me to say on this Holy Saturday that the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ for sin is the only thing that can rescue any of us from ourselves.
When this happens, they (narcs) turn & manipulate their adult children. Especially if they (narcs) were an absent parent. The adult child thinks this is a chance to mend their relationship with that parent, only to endure manipulation & abuse. They (narcs) are truly capable of the most evil, sinister & vile behaviour & actions.
Agreed. My MIL treats women (competition in her head) like crap when men are not around. My daughter who's a teen went to spend time with her grandparents and find a job. She got abused by her own grandmother. Now that we know what my MIL is, no contact from any us here on out.
Yep my mother did that, me and my kids always said , I'm sure you told it differently last time. My kids didn't know her so well, I was minimal contact since I was 18. But Mother saw herself as the grand matriarch of the family, but if we didn't play her game, it was tears and sometimes she stamped her feet. That was for not taking her seriously enough.
I know a 73 year old male narcissist, and every word you say is 100% truth. He has always been a narcissist in every sense of the word, but now in his old age no one wants any part of him, including his own blood relatives. He throws terrible temper tantrums over seemingly insignificant matters BUT not insignificant to aging narcissists. He demands to be right about everything and thinks he knows everything. He throws a fit if anyone at all challenges his thoughts. He thinks all females want him and flirt with him, but in reality they laugh at him. He thinks his neighbor killed her spouse, and that another guy he barely knows murdered his neighbor. He's convinced they're guilty, offering zero proof. Now he claims he never said that. Only I call him, and only because no one else does, but I limit my contact, and let his sister know what's going on, since she rarely speaks to him either, this after he stole a lot of money the now deceased parents left for their adult kids. He took all of it. He has no friends and spends his afternoons either sitting in bars drinking or drinking at home. At some point, if he lives long enough, he will be placed into a facility, with no visitors since he alienated everyone. Sad but predictable.
My dad is 70, he’s almost just as bad. For the last couple of years, I’d only talk with him every couple of months, grey rock. Last time I talked to him, I thought wow! This guy is not in touch with reality anymore. I wondered which of his flying monkeys still didn’t question his sanity, ie my mom, sister, his “slow” friend. I went no contact two days ago finally. He was getting worse fast. Trying to sabotage my marriage, job, reputation…
@@AH-mw8vi.... don't let him do it, please. I'd be very happy if you set a boundary that he cannot breach. I know I'm a complete stranger to you... but I've had such a similar experience, that I hope you will at last deny him a false victory. You do not need to supply him; his life is his own responsibility. One thing I've learned about narcs is that they don't even know us as people. We are merely sources of supply... so there's no use trying to connect in a personal way at all. They are predators, users, abusers, deniers, liars, etc. Don't feel you've lost a person; the person was never there. 🎉
Yeah. Those facilities are awful. There's abuse and neglect in those facilities toward the elderly residences. And that narcissist deserves to end up in that kind of place. He has tortered and abused people for a long time. And now it's his come-up-ins. What goes around, comes around. It's coming around! Haha!
They sprinkle enough kernels of truth into their distortions and lies to make their false narratives “believable.” Thank you for covering this topic so well. I just wish our family therapist had the kind of insight you do. She laps up every piece of garbage that comes out of my mom’s mouth. Smh. My elderly narc mother has effectively “recruited” the psychologist. I feel tense every time I go into our therapy sessions. The only one who looks forward to our “sessions,” is my mom.
..."They sprinkle enough kernels of truth into their distortions and lies to make their false narratives “believable.”......Perfect description of the globalists, the govt and their controlled media as well.
@Suze52 Yes. I do agree with you that I feel that I'm being driven crazy by a Narcissist in my life. It's not you! It's them doing it to you to make you think you are going crazy.
I was bewildered when my mother started to rewrite history. For example the gifts she got from me and my sister (the golden child), like dinner set and the coffee set that I found and bought (while my sister agreed to contribute to and present it as the gift from both of us), is now presented to guests and family as the beautiful gifts my sister bought for her. I think my sister started to believe in this and many other tales about me that our mom spins to relatives.
They will never give you the credit for anything good you did for them. And any mistakes you made will be blown way out of proporation and never forgotten. Also they will project all their faults and failures onto you as well. That's why we are called the Scapegoats, because we are forced to bear their sins as well as our own. Jesus was a Scapegoat (but He never sinned).
My malignant narcissist grandmother wrote an autobiography that contained stories her relatives didn't recognize. I didn't understand why she did this, until I heard this video!🎉
4:00 "When anything happens to them negatively, they MUST rewrite the narrative that makes them the hero, the victim, or the Martyr." Yep. I can just see the words being typed on their phone or laptop: "He crazy! I have NO IDEA why this happened. Tee HEE HEE HEE!..."
My grandma is about 96 and still going strong as well. She loves to tell stories about the past that make everything seem like sunshine and rainbows, when later my dad whispers to me how those things never happened.
The DEMONS in THESE evil people keeps them alive for eternity....I have been praying for my mother to die every since I was. 7 years old....this HELL WILL NEVER END, SHE IS NOW A HEALTHY 94 YEAR OLD B****...she has DESTROYED our family....always the VICTIM....and can tell the most amazing stories to others about her kindness and wisdom.....ALL AMUSING LIES.... A lie unchallenged becomes their truth.
@@christiejones6214 My Dad wants me to be miserable, he wants to take me down with him.....😈 But, I learned he feeds off my anger, and misery, and now I left him without arguing like he wanted...... I TOLD HIM IM GONNA RISE ABOVE HIM, AND PRAY FOR HIM......🙏...... THESE LAST WORDS WILL DRIVE HIM NUTS...... GOOD LUCK TO YOU, BETTER DAYS ARE COMING!!!!!
My narcistic music student rewrote history letteraly. She tried to convince me Mozart had 6 sons and two of them became composers. When I corrected her she said: didn’t you see the movie?
Would you consider a part 3 on how they use their health as a tool to manipulate their adult child. My partner is stuck in this situation and feels guilty for leaving her. Thank you for these videos.
This is so true.When i no longer could believe the lies,he got very abusive.So it might be better to just go along with them until you can get to a place of safety
Hang in there. Bonus points for when the Ghost of Christmas past comes at them, after you leave them shocked. Like John Lennon sang in 'You Can't Do That' "I feel I'm gonna out of my mind. I'm going to let you down. And leave you blind. (GONNA LET YOU DOWN AND LEAVE YOU BLIND!) Because I told you before. You can't do that!" (People forget that there's some venom in those early mop top Beatles lyrics, haha! Of course that song was put on side 2 and not a single, haha! Might nterfere with their lovable moptop image then:)
Wow! Hero, victim or martyr. . . yes, yes, yes! It makes total sense now. I was just thinking to myself how "pathetic" his behavior was . . and you used the same term!
Sometimes they are very sneaky about it though, especially if they are the "Saintly Martyr" type like my covert egg donor. They will do it under the guise of "concern" which gives them carte blanche to disseminate whatever type of slander they can come up with against the Scapegoat.
It also seems like they all use the same terminology to describe their former victims, Like; * Weirdo/ ugly/ stuck up = they won’t respond to my flirting, or they rejected me already. Zero supply offered, and it irritates me because it interferes with my delusion of being irresistible. * Total psycho = they seem to be fully aware of what I’m all about, so I have to smear their reputation in case they might be exposing me. * I’m worried sick about him/ her = I’m currently targeting this individual. Please agree to be my flying monkey, spy and collect info about them, then report back to me. * He/ she constantly accused me of made up stuff I never did = I definitely did those things, I do them every time, but this time I got caught. * He/ She played mind games/ power plays = I tried to do all those things to them, but it failed. I can never fail though, so I project my failed attempts on them. Just to name a few
Before I even knew what narcissism was I remember it hitting me around my mom's 60th birthday. She got oddly upset that people in her life weren't planning some kind of big party for her 👀 even though we literally never had big parties for anyone's birthdays. Last year was her 70th and yet again no big party, I wonder if she took that personally lol.
Being disappointed that no one makes a fuss over milestone birthdays hardly qualifies someone as a narcissist. Seems like you're being a little hard on your mom.
@@floridagirl5250 This is the tip of the iceberg. When I was having a miscarriage my mom told me I was being gross for talking about my period. I grew up with very poor self esteem due to her constant criticism. She almost tried to make me drop out of college a year before graduation because I made a paperwork mistake. So please don't try to gaslight me by saying I'm the one with a problem. Thanks.
I (1973) VERY recently discarded a flying monkey older best friend of mine (1957)!who fit into the category of the aging narcissist. No offense to the 60 plus people. I'll be there in no time at 47. But some of the older folks went through what she's talking about and this is a good video and you'll surely have you soul refilled by AS WELL by this one. Especially if you had a few of those types try to take you down lately like I did. Narcissist parents conspiring with secret flying monkey SPY, who pretends to be a fellow scapegoat. Who starts preaching their stuff, all a sudden, that goes against their own beliefs.. can anyone say "dog whistling" when it doesn't come to racism? This is one of those cases. It's the way of transparently talking shit about you with plausible deniability with code words. You'll kinda know it when it's happening. But you'll say to yourself if you're me, no way, not this person! Some fellow scapegoats are just narcissists in training. Be careful and let go of them once they show their true colors!
Im trying to figure my mother out. The emotional abuse between a mother that hates her daughter is real , it hurts even at my age. She has gone back in time , playing mind games with herself and using me as a target .
before i began a journey of recovery from narc abuse, i might have believed my grandmother was a narc. she had a toughness to her when i was young. she was loving in a tough way. very irish. the years before she passed, i saw her very differently. in her last decades she was older and more frail, but i sensed an authenticity that surely means she was not a narc. maybe she had too many rules and feared germs too much, but she lived through the great depression. she was a joy to me in her later years. and that was a blessing. if narcs get worse as they age, then my biological mother and brother may each spontaneously combust. i honestly hope i never see or hear from either again. i suspect i will have to be more proactive to avoid them indefinitely 🙁
Miss you're long hair, Jill. Thanks for taking the time to record these videos, they are very helpful after a year and a half of abuse that I had no understanding about what what and why it was happening
I'm very curious what story my adopted mother conjured up, once she realized I was gone/absent (I'm 67 yrs) and not coming back into her life for any reason. Her toxic abusiveness has only intensified as she has aged (94 yrs). The latest tidbit that infuriated her was my choice not to get the jab. She was practically gnashing her teeth at me, belittling and carrying on. . Until she hung up on me. It's futile trying to please her at this stage. I'm done! And I've never felt better.
They become like the Grinch That Stole Christmas! You don't want to be in their cross heirs you will be public enemy number 1. They will gaslight and manipulate you with word salad and everything else in their tool box of goodies!
My narc husband is approaching 70. All of our children keep distance from him (he hasn’t seen or spoken to one for 7years). He keeps saying I worked hard all my life to raise children who act like my enemies. He cannot grasp the fact that his behavior drove them away. He also worked for his own self aggrandizement, me and the children were hardly given a thought except to take frustration out on. If I was interested in his well-being I would try to explain all of this but I am not and know FOR SURE he would never understand that he had brought this all on himself. In the meantime I hardly see my kids and have to listen to his endless repetition of how hard done by he is.
My mother use hugs as a form of narcissistic supply. I had to stop hugging her, which is so bizarre and she freaks out and tries to emotionally manipulate me to give her a hug. It is really sad.
Yep, one of my coworkers is an "aging narcissist." Good grief, she is absolutely pathetic. She goes to exorbitant lengths to convince people she's the hero, victim, or martyr. I can not stand her. Most nobody can either. Just her mere presence is enough to make your skin crawl, ugh!!
Excellent. Bull's eye! Thank you. I tolerated his progressive madness here, but as you said, the older they get, the more bizarre their delusional world becomes too much to take. At my 5th try to divorce, I finally made it out, so very exhausted that I barely made it to the court... Now looking back, I am convinced that these creatures are possessed by some very powerful dark, vampiric forces. The mastery in flipping the reality and into so very creative narratives... and this is what empowered my ex, watching me falling into the same trap, then his sadism stepped in, feeding on my emotional pain through such ''rituals' of energy extorsion. This was all beyond a human comprehension for me. I side with the demonic possession of a loser who trades his dying soul and becomes a host to such demonic parasitic energies of destruction.
My dad always acted like he was the biggest bad ass and had to fight with everyone his whole life and won every fight. Now days he has a hard time keeping his mouth shut and embarrassing his family and starting fights where they're not needed and plays the victim roll very well.
I literally learned the word martyr from researching what tf was wrong with my mother when I was a teenager. Thankfully she cut me off a couple of years ago by lying about and being in denial about why my niece no longer sees her, and blaming me. She texted that she would never forgive me, and I haven’t bothered replying.
Through their lack of insight they look at accomplishments and why are they not better off financially. They become angry because they have nothing to show for their life. (Judgment, insight are lacking); they attempt to rationalize everything. It due to their deficits. But they always deflect rather than accept responsibility for many situations. I have seen psychotic events in the middle age 58 yr old female narcissist. She was convinced she heard creatures in the wall. After 1/2 hour i said take you tranquilizer there is nothing in the wall. To my suprise she took the pill.
Your right. The evil narcissist must be left in the world of and not limited to “You’re the cause now you’re feeling the effects.” And then walk away.ℹ️💯✅❤️✝️🙏🏿📖🗡👊🏿👌🏿👍🏿🥷☯️😎
Spot on! My MIL was the victim when she had to declare bankruptcy years ago. She owned 4 properties and had no job. FIL was working part time. She lost his family land because she had to build a house on their land to replace the mobile home. But it wasn’t her fault. She was a victim of the housing bubble. She did illegal things to protect her homes and lost her H’s family land. It was sad.
I have to admit, I feel a little sorry for my ex. It's getting harder for him to get his supply. He wants to be seen as the hero. He will always make sure everyone knows about whatever wonderful thing he just did to help someone. But now, most people who know us probably realize there is a good reason why I broke up with him. That he isn't as wonderful as he makes himself out to be. I haven't told many people just how badly he hurt me, but I have told him. And he has to live with the knowledge that to his most recent partner, he is no hero. He's almost 70 now. His prospects for a new partner are running down.
Good advice: never, ever feel sorry for a narcissist. These cowardly, boundary-breaking, scheming, victimizing parasites have made an entire living off of fair minded and empathetic people: we own them nothing. Each of us is responsible for a life: our own. Deny the narc your empathy: the narc is blind to it anyway.
I've watched this video several times. Both my DNA donors are narcissist. They are very enmeshed with me and a large brood of enablers and golden children. No Contact 6.5 years now (from ALL of Them) and I still get an occasional Christmas or birthday card just to ruin my day. I usually don't open them. I opened one recently from my NF, which said "merry christmas, and stay safe" with a check for $100. He's just barreling on through with his Total Denial of any wrong doing and playing the endless game of Pretend. Pretending that his behavior is not abuse. Pretending that I'm going to put up with it ever again etc...I've recovered a lot and it still makes me shake my head every time I witness their complete denial of reality and their refusal to change and grow too.
Way to go! I should of gone no contact at least that long ago. It’s been two days since I’ve finally committed for the first time to go no contact from my narc parents. I worked for my father for years, he stole thousands from my wife and kids. I think I will do the same (rip up a check or bill) if I get one from them. I went no contact on my birthday so I may just get the chance. If I wasn’t following the rules of no contact, I’d send them a video of me burning the check or bill and give them more to gossip about but hey, that’s just petty. I can’t believe it took me so long to go no contact
II just recently moved from a home that was being rented from a 70+ year old decomposing and delusional psychopath. Not only did he and his wife attempt to (infiltrate) and inmesh themselves into my personal life, but continuously violate my boundaries. He retaliated by shutting off the breakers which provided power to three areas of the home (claiming shorts) and forced me to live without any heat or hot water to bathe for almost five straight months. When legally held accountable, he continued to avoid accountability and to prevent exposure, he's played the victim, martyr and hero. He's been extremely vindictive and has continued to retaliate by not only inventing some of the most ridiculous and delusional stories that aren't true, but called me crazy, lunatic, paranoid and insane. He's also started running some hideous smear campaigns to attack my character, emotional, psychological and mental stability. He's a racist who thinks himself superior, so rules and laws don't apply to him and on Tuesday he will be served to appear in court for believing himself entitled to keep my large security deposit.
Thank you for this. I need to get more information on the aging narcissist. All the videos I watch talk about affairs, posting on Facebook, etc. Although I want to get as much information as I can. All that talk about Facebook posts just isn't my circumstance. No mistresses, no Facebook posts, no flying monkeys. None of that stuff. I need a video that will address older people that aren't into technology and had no friends. (Meaning no flying monkeys, no smear campaigns, no affairs, nothing that involves other people.) Can you talk more about this type of person?
Why do you know or care about the cost to her? Her behaviour will always come at YOUR expense for as long as you allow it. Put her out. Shut the door of your home, mind & heart & don't re-open until it has moved on to a new victim. (This won't take long but you must hold firm). That's what i did, i only wish i did it sooner. The years they consume will forever be remembered as years wasted!
At some point, hate to add more pain to what you're feeling, we have to get fed up with ourselves for taking more abuse from these sickos. I promise you she'll do their favorite trick of all: PULL THE RUG FROM UNDER YOUR FEET when all is going well. Something will be said or done to the point where you just cannot reconcile the cognitive dissonance within yourself anymore. BUT IF YOU WANT MORE OF THE PREDICTEDABLE MEAN/SWEET CYCLE, BE MY GUEST. (I used to subject myself to this too-- until I finally wised up with a few.)
Thank you for your content. It is quite useful. However I must add that even though you are highly accurate in many ways...there is one way in which you slightly forget. That if you are a true master of your own reality/destiny, you can form/shape even the harder core narcs into something more benign, kind of think of it like how the Jedi can mind influence those who are less evolved in their simplistic thinking. Although it is WISE to understand that this takes MOUNDS of self-work, and highly spiritually advanced practices...so your advice IS SAFEST for the vast majority. Also thinking about - is the effort worth the endeavor, after all expending this kind of energy on changing or protecting yourself from others in such ways is often simply super-ceded by merely removing yourself from such abusive/manipulative personalities presence. As it is the path of least resistance I guess you could call it.
Out of the blue after 50 years he told me I was getting old and he wasn't going to get taking care.of. Me pretty cold since I've taken care of his needs for years while he ran with his friends leaving me alone a lot of the te broke my heart
My narcissistic husband is playing the victim. He still manipulates he still tries to contact me. We are divorced. He still text me and calls me names and tells me I’m not capable of being independent, or taking care of myself that I have to sell the house because he wants half the money so he could live his Substance-abuse lifestyle and go out with young girls. He’s 73 years old. And his only interest is getting high and going out with younger women. And he’s trying to take everything away from me and saying that I cannot take care of myself. And since we got the divorce and I’m on my own, I feel much better. I look much better I’m healthier. I can’t get rid of him no matter what not even with the divorce
They’re also difficult imposing and self absorbed neighbors in senior income based housing, calling other residents at 5 am, bragging about how they hide their income so as to not pay their legal fair share of rent costs, how others are jealous of them, and all they ever talk about is themselves, rarely if ever asking how someone else is, always have to be right, knowitalls, braggarts, delusional, totally 💯 percent selfish and self absorbed time and energy thieves, Avoid them, and don’t take their calls
My mother will play the victim and, unfortunately, might be easy for her. She will play the victim of me, because I’ve gone no contact and the entire family felt that I should be the fall girl anyway so, she has a willing audience, particularly in my sister, who is still likely engaging with her. If the news that I went no contact got out to people who respected my stepfather’s work, she’d paint the picture that I had my priorities out of order or was crazy, because I decided to get a regular job and didn’t use every inch of my life to perpetuate his work or the work of both of my parents. There are many who’d will believe her to be right. They wouldn’t know or care that, under my mother’s iron fist and because the business depended upon my stepfather being alive, that it was no longer sustainable, let alone sustaining for the family. They wouldn’t care that she was simply using her kids as casualties where, if the business succeeded, it was her success and if it failed, it was our failure. They wouldn’t care, if we lost everything trying to support it, while she did just fine, living off her assets and social security. Her neighbors may have wondered where I disappeared to and, almost, who my sister is. A lot of this is because many people who knew my stepfather’s work or are my mother’s neighbors are getting on in age themselves. There’s the generational divide and, yep, many parents who’ve had working lives themselves, I suspect, seem to wonder just where their children are, when the parents should be their first and only priority. Well, they’re probably WORKING. Working harder for less than their parents have. But, parents don’t see and believe that, because they often become myopic, as they age, if not entirely narcissistic. Those of us who have demanding, aging narcissistic parents know that no one else cares about “no contact”. No contact is simply seen as abandonment. No one else cares whether your parent doesn’t have any dementia at all and is just an absolutely wretched nightmare. They simply feel that your parents are the most “for better or for worse” relationship you’ll actually have. So you may find that there is NOTHING an aging, narcissistic parent isn’t the victim of and that everyone’s cutting their eyes at you, in wonderment about how you couldn’t fix it all, even if the parent is destroying everything in their path.
Nailed it. These wicked narcs pretty much get away with all their wickedness in this life (but not the next). The next one will last for a lot longer than 80-100 years.
Growingandlearning perhaps so and I’m glad that it resonates with people sometimes but, am more so saddened that so many are going through similar or the same. We’d all be far happier to have loving, normal, happy relationships with our aging parents. It was certainly what I’d looked forward to, understanding that, if I didn’t die first, I’d be there for her, when she passed. But, I couldn’t comprehend what was brewing and I’d almost rather it just be dementia. But, when I look back, even with a recent revelation, yep, what is evidentiary stretches back to 20+ years ago, when she was a fully-functional person, providing all the more reason to write her off.
@@privateprivate8366 Yeah, everyone just says, "That's how old people are." Absolutely NOT true. My mother-in-law had dementia and she was a loving mother to both her son and me and her other three kids. My mother has been cold, calculating, conniving -- sabotaging my career, even though she was the one who WANTED me to go to medical school -- stealing mutual funds from me without any remorse, leaving me with capital gains taxes, so many things.... and it was not dementia. It wasn't until I told my husband some of the things she did when I was a child that I understood.... the woman did not love me. EVER. No contact has been my survival. Sabotaging my job was tantamount to stealing money from my kids. My innocent kids. No contact ensures that a grown adult who had 78 years to know better does not get to abuse her own grandchildren. My mother-in-law is my role-model for parenting now. I am grateful for her wisdom, and the way she has shown me to grow old with grace. My mother, on the otherhand, is like a cartoon. Except she is my mother. No contact, people. It's the only way to survive them. It's not just me she's hurt. She took advantage of my dad. She's horrible to everyone. No one deserves her abuse. NO ONE.
The narcissist I just got away from would have these unbelievable tantrums via text and if I just ignored him, he would tell me how cruel I was for sitting back and just watching him fall apart. I'd be the villain....yet he'd have just said that he couldn't live without me in his life and threaten suicide and say that I would be to blame.....this was a man in his late 40s. I dread to think what he'll be trying to pull in his 50s because I sure as hell won't be around for it
I went to a family Christmas Party. When I got home, my ex started a melt down because he could not reach me. We were done by 12.31, when I realized he'd sent me a catfished photo of his "son."
My parents and there friends plus some of my co workers they do the most Im 40 I know I will get there age my 22 year old make sures I know Im not in the 20s anymore
Not everyone, just most. We are in the end times and the wicked outnumber the righteous by a landslide. Two seperate seedlines at "enmity" with one another....Genesis 3:15. Cain vs Seth. The "rhogam shot" gave the narcs the advantage. God designed His (non narc) daughters bodies to reject and miscarry narc babies (genetic aberrations) and so the psychopathic narc scientists designed the "rhogam shot" to over ride this natural selection process so that now the bad seed outnumbers the good seed.
I think as humans we are naturally flawed, we all have had and still have some characteristics of narcissistic behavior but it's one ability to have a sense of self and internal reflection. Making yourself accountable and striving to change not change others. The constant struggle of life, feed the ego or feed the soul. Turn your will over to God
My step father was so delusional in his old age that he tried to convince people that in Africa there were insects bigger than houses. Delusion + not a very high IQ = immense stupidity. When someone dared to confront this ridiculousness he lost his temper and shouted at them for how arrogant they were.
Absolutely when they age , They forget there lies , and are worried of that ! They lose controle over them self and complaining that they get older ! Yes I know why ? haha ;-) Happy Easter everyone .
that was good advice but it was extremely redundant and the video cravings shorter as a result or you could’ve actually made notes and helped you clearly express some of the other things that were left out as a result first of all they’re ugly not only and behavior but those bad feelings actually caused bad hormones and they become ugly as a result that’s not me being hateful that’s just me saying if you’re older you’re not as pretty as used to be and you’re also dealing with a different age group who is more seasoned who’s got more experience so it’s less likely that an older woman is going to believe your bullshit as opposed to a younger woman now my ex narcissist of 2 1/2 months because I have so much experience with narcissists and I’ve learned to spot them in a crowd happens to tell me at the age of 54 that if it doesn’t work out and I’m supposed to be the last person he’s with knowing him for 32 years… He’s going to end up chasing after 35/40 year old woman So why do you think that is? Because the asshole isn’t going to be able to sell his bullshit to a woman of my age And believe me he has a lot of it I’m surprise he doesn’t live in the middle of the pasture When we were younger and we hung out a lot he was very quiet almost seemed shy but I could see his little tantrums and tempers poking through they weren’t in mirable then but he wasn’t as brazen or impatient he was seasoning himself as a experienced narcissist another last 25 years I’m not talking he’s gotten to the point of having no fucks he has no patience is what he has He wants what he wants and he wants it now and he doesn’t give a shit how you feel about it you are going to be his target and you’re gonna give him what he wants point-blank He told me feelings are not facts Not only that but he didn’t see the point in me looking to improve the aesthetics of his hoarding because that doesn’t make a difference in the world so then I guess his hoarding does? The other thing to look out for is if people like this cannot find a human to steal energy from they will have an animal and you can tell by the state of that animal exactly who that person is because an animal will always be a mirror So I get there and the dog is dying simple case to solve the dog is infested with fleas he’s 54 and he’s never seen a flea before? I highly doubt that House is covered in blood this dog is dripping blood that’s how bad the infestation was Tim when he shakes his blood splatters all over the walls and everything that’s nearby the house smelled like blood As a result the dog was severely anemic what I’m gonna tell you if you don’t know anything about animal totems any kind of bloodsucking insect whether to bedbugs scabies fleas or ticks is probably a good indication that you were in the presence of a narcissist I ended up having to go work and out of my pocket by flea treatment for this dog get him to give the dog several baths and start him on a supplemental plan to restore his blood using super foods that were adequate for canines A lot of cleansing a lot of healing and a lot of love which I won’t even really touch on this except for the fact that when I went to touch his animal he froze and locked He looked like he was in agony and it’s because he had been emotionally starved for almost 14 years of his life at least the last 12 because that’s how long the narcissist was alone with this animal and this animal had no connection or contact with other humans Pay attention if a dog is younger and not debilitated as the one I’m describing because this dog could actually through body language show you that the person you’re about to enter face which is dangerous and chances are happens to be a narcissist amongst other things I had this experience when I was doing rideshare and I was relatively young in my experience… I had picked up a man who was telling outlandish stories didn’t want me to leave kept trying to talk me into his house and of course I was an interested but I’m highly intuitive so I was listening to that intuition After trying to drop him off he made me take him back to the gas station so he could get some things and his intention supposedly was to feed me which I wasn’t hungry When that didn’t work he tried to get me into the darker part of his backyard and he used his dog as they I did open my door and stand next to my car and as I took a step or two towards the gate leading into the backyard the dog dropped on his front legs down to the ground with his butt up in the air showed all of his teeth and was growling and in attack mode facing his human To this day and that’s almost 7 years later I believe had eight steps in that backyard that man would’ve done bad things to me drug me in the house and I wouldn’t be here to leave this comment today Narcissism can be a very deadly issue that’s another thing that’s not mentioned here it’s almost treated as if it’s just a nuisance If this person has all nine traits they can be deadly but they only have to have five to be that and you don’t have to be a professional psychologist or psychiatrist to look for those signs and listen to your intuition which should be telling you to run like hell to break all contact and to not have anything to do with that individual again Moving forward anybody that is out here trying to date or even meet people on a regular do not give out your personal information of any kind not your last name don’t talk about your family don’t talk about your past experiences don’t post any personal information on your social media Probably don’t even add those new people to your social media where they can extrapolate information about your family take pictures and put them in a private folder which is what my last one was doing and stocking people online including you these people are mental they’re not like other people that you know they’re emotionally and mentally unstable and unpredictable Because they’ll use the information against you when they’re abusing you and some people are too much of an open book Too trusting too naïve But you don’t wanna expose your friends or family to these people either so be very cautious moving forward and if you’re on dating networks I promise you 98% of people on there are narcissistic and they have other mental disorders and some of those can be a very deadly combination I wouldn’t even put myself out there that way If I didn’t know this about a person I’ve known for 32 years what makes you think you’re going to know anyone truly even after living with them because I lived with him for a year and then again for a couple of months and I knew there was something off I just didn’t see all of it I did listen to my intuition and I went about my business But in this day and age it really is becoming a progressive problem and they will be all over social media all over dating networks all over sexual meet ups You don’t know who you’re dealing with so the best thing for you to do is be smart and don’t interact with these people keep your interactions to the people you know well and watch for the signs and symptoms and if you don’t know what those nine traits are or should I say red flags? Find out what they are and there should be a list in every description box of every video that you post on this channel showing all nine traits and there should be a reference to open that description box to take a look We are living in some very scary times and I’m not suggesting to be scared I’m suggesting to be proactive and forearmed as well as to initiate common sense at every turn
Hero, victim or martyr...sometimes all three at once.
Depends on who there talking to.
That’s for sure
does anyone else feel they are being driven crazy by the narcissist in their life?
One thing I learned is stop emotional thinking about them, take them like a grain 🌾 of salt, they will if you let them, don't loose yourself.
I was but now I’m free !
You must escape and get YOU back! It’s possible !!!
hi Susie I been mentaly torture bye my ex for 4 years of and on I caught him out tonight he got a bird in his place and they are both drugies !!!now I am free and I can start my life plus j change my no to the night mare of my ex narsicist has gone free free !!!!
Yes
You don’t feel it, you are being driven crazy. You are slowly being killed by a thousand cuts 💁
I noticed that they also become more hysterical and double down on the lie they are living when called out. Take care out there. 🕊
When a coworker took in her elderly mom and two aunts, she said, "I've noticed that people just become more like themselves as they get older". Fortunately her mom and aunts were nice people. Unfortunately, this also applies to narcs and their ilk.
C.S. Lewis termed it "quiddity." I'm not sure that's the word's original meaning, but Lewis used it to mean that everyone is indeed becoming more and more what he or she actually is. Permit me to say on this Holy Saturday that the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ for sin is the only thing that can rescue any of us from ourselves.
@@bobtaylor170 Amen.
When this happens, they (narcs) turn & manipulate their adult children. Especially if they (narcs) were an absent parent. The adult child thinks this is a chance to mend their relationship with that parent, only to endure manipulation & abuse. They (narcs) are truly capable of the most evil, sinister & vile behaviour & actions.
Agreed. My MIL treats women (competition in her head) like crap when men are not around. My daughter who's a teen went to spend time with her grandparents and find a job. She got abused by her own grandmother. Now that we know what my MIL is, no contact from any us here on out.
@@kazeeevaughan3380 I'm watching my young adult children go through this with their father. It is disgusting, and I know it won't end well.
I always asked my mother why she was trying to "rewrite history". Now I know the answer
Yep my mother did that, me and my kids always said , I'm sure you told it differently last time. My kids didn't know her so well, I was minimal contact since I was 18. But Mother saw herself as the grand matriarch of the family, but if we didn't play her game, it was tears and sometimes she stamped her feet. That was for not taking her seriously enough.
Same here
My wife was exactly the same, you think you're losing your mind until you realise they're liars!
I know a 73 year old male narcissist, and every word you say is 100% truth. He has always been a narcissist in every sense of the word, but now in his old age no one wants any part of him, including his own blood relatives. He throws terrible temper tantrums over seemingly insignificant matters BUT not insignificant to aging narcissists. He demands to be right about everything and thinks he knows everything. He throws a fit if anyone at all challenges his thoughts. He thinks all females want him and flirt with him, but in reality they laugh at him. He thinks his neighbor killed her spouse, and that another guy he barely knows murdered his neighbor. He's convinced they're guilty, offering zero proof. Now he claims he never said that. Only I call him, and only because no one else does, but I limit my contact, and let his sister know what's going on, since she rarely speaks to him either, this after he stole a lot of money the now deceased parents left for their adult kids. He took all of it. He has no friends and spends his afternoons either sitting in bars drinking or drinking at home.
At some point, if he lives long enough, he will be placed into a facility, with no visitors since he alienated everyone. Sad but predictable.
My dad is 70, he’s almost just as bad. For the last couple of years, I’d only talk with him every couple of months, grey rock. Last time I talked to him, I thought wow! This guy is not in touch with reality anymore. I wondered which of his flying monkeys still didn’t question his sanity, ie my mom, sister, his “slow” friend. I went no contact two days ago finally. He was getting worse fast. Trying to sabotage my marriage, job, reputation…
Sometimes the elderly deserve a lonely old age. It is sometimes the case that they have worked very hard for it!
@@AH-mw8vi.... don't let him do it, please. I'd be very happy if you set a boundary that he cannot breach. I know I'm a complete stranger to you... but I've had such a similar experience, that I hope you will at last deny him a false victory. You do not need to supply him; his life is his own responsibility.
One thing I've learned about narcs is that they don't even know us as people. We are merely sources of supply... so there's no use trying to connect in a personal way at all. They are predators, users, abusers, deniers, liars, etc. Don't feel you've lost a person; the person was never there. 🎉
Then he'll abuse the nurses staff then scream victim
Yeah. Those facilities are awful. There's abuse and neglect in those facilities toward the elderly residences. And that narcissist deserves to end up in that kind of place. He has tortered and abused people for a long time. And now it's his come-up-ins.
What goes around, comes around.
It's coming around!
Haha!
They sprinkle enough kernels of truth into their distortions and lies to make their false narratives “believable.” Thank you for covering this topic so well. I just wish our family therapist had the kind of insight you do. She laps up every piece of garbage that comes out of my mom’s mouth. Smh. My elderly narc mother has effectively “recruited” the psychologist. I feel tense every time I go into our therapy sessions. The only one who looks forward to our “sessions,” is my mom.
..."They sprinkle enough kernels of truth into their distortions and lies to make their false narratives “believable.”......Perfect description of the globalists, the govt and their controlled media as well.
@@reesedaniel5835 yes yes yes
Get a new therapist
Never go to therapy WITH a narcissist. By all means do a single therapy for yourself. The Narcissist will never change.
Stop going. Easy enough said though only way to begin the separation
Thank you so much for everything you do Jill. You are truly a gift and have been so helpful in recovery!
Indeed. We honor you 👽🖖
@@vatrweaver5169 li9p
@Suze52 Yes. I do agree with you that I feel that I'm being driven crazy by a Narcissist in my life. It's not you! It's them doing it to you to make you think you are going crazy.
I was bewildered when my mother started to rewrite history. For example the gifts she got from me and my sister (the golden child), like dinner set and the coffee set that I found and bought (while my sister agreed to contribute to and present it as the gift from both of us), is now presented to guests and family as the beautiful gifts my sister bought for her. I think my sister started to believe in this and many other tales about me that our mom spins to relatives.
They will never give you the credit for anything good you did for them. And any mistakes you made will be blown way out of proporation and never forgotten. Also they will project all their faults and failures onto you as well. That's why we are called the Scapegoats, because we are forced to bear their sins as well as our own. Jesus was a Scapegoat (but He never sinned).
My malignant narcissist grandmother wrote an autobiography that contained stories her relatives didn't recognize. I didn't understand why she did this, until I heard this video!🎉
they are amoral but manipulate moral people into feeling guilt and other things - it's the damndest!
4:00 "When anything happens to them negatively, they MUST rewrite the narrative that makes them the hero, the victim, or the Martyr." Yep. I can just see the words being typed on their phone or laptop: "He crazy! I have NO IDEA why this happened. Tee HEE HEE HEE!..."
Yes. My mother does that. If the story doesn't cast her in a good light, she changes the entire story.
Most of the claims of elder abuse is an urban myth but when they abuse staff its all out - retired nurse
I wonder if they become more sociopathic as they age. Or it’s just a combo of npd and onset of dementia/Alzheimer’s symptoms.
I have wondered that myself.
God said i’ll create dementia to deal with these people.
and Alzheimers said,
hold my beer. 😎
Of course
They become worst in old age, they never get better, I know this by experience. You better run as I did , you can do It.
It's not dementia or alzheimer's. That is just a cover that they sometimes use to cover up their known bad behavior. Don't let them get away with it.
My Dad is 94, NARCISSIST,
and going strong ......😥
My grandma is about 96 and still going strong as well. She loves to tell stories about the past that make everything seem like sunshine and rainbows, when later my dad whispers to me how those things never happened.
@@moldypotatochip I feel your PAIN
The DEMONS in THESE evil people keeps them alive for eternity....I have been praying for my mother to die every since I was. 7 years old....this HELL WILL NEVER END, SHE IS NOW A HEALTHY 94 YEAR OLD B****...she has DESTROYED our family....always the VICTIM....and can tell the most amazing stories to others about her kindness and wisdom.....ALL AMUSING LIES....
A lie unchallenged becomes their truth.
This sounds like my mum too
@@christiejones6214 My Dad wants me to be miserable, he wants to take me down with him.....😈 But, I learned he feeds off my anger, and misery, and now I left him without arguing like he wanted...... I TOLD HIM IM GONNA RISE ABOVE HIM, AND PRAY FOR HIM......🙏...... THESE LAST WORDS WILL DRIVE HIM NUTS......
GOOD LUCK TO YOU, BETTER DAYS ARE COMING!!!!!
Hero/victim/martyr 🔥💯 "Word Salad" 🤣💯 I used to describe it as navigating the swirling sea of verbal diarrhea!
My narcistic music student rewrote history letteraly. She tried to convince me Mozart had 6 sons and two of them became composers. When I corrected her she said: didn’t you see the movie?
I have been married for 50 years to a narcissist wife . The story s I could tell you . I am trying to get away
Would you consider a part 3 on how they use their health as a tool to manipulate their adult child. My partner is stuck in this situation and feels guilty for leaving her. Thank you for these videos.
This is so true.When i no longer could believe the lies,he got very abusive.So it might be better to just go along with them until you can get to a place of safety
Do your greatest academy award winning acting until you can make a plan and get out!
Hang in there. Bonus points for when the Ghost of Christmas past comes at them, after you leave them shocked. Like John Lennon sang in 'You Can't Do That' "I feel I'm gonna out of my mind. I'm going to let you down. And leave you blind. (GONNA LET YOU DOWN AND LEAVE YOU BLIND!) Because I told you before. You can't do that!" (People forget that there's some venom in those early mop top Beatles lyrics, haha! Of course that song was put on side 2 and not a single, haha! Might nterfere with their lovable moptop image then:)
Lennon was MOST DEFINITELY a narcissist!
Wow! Hero, victim or martyr. . . yes, yes, yes! It makes total sense now. I was just thinking to myself how "pathetic" his behavior was . . and you used the same term!
Jill do they also constantly speak badly about others always focusing on people's faults?
Yeah, depending on what type they are. They are incredibly judgmental.
Sometimes they are very sneaky about it though, especially if they are the "Saintly Martyr" type like my covert egg donor. They will do it under the guise of "concern" which gives them carte blanche to disseminate whatever type of slander they can come up with against the Scapegoat.
Yes my covert 78yr old mother has done this all her life but it seemed to worsen as she aged.
Yes. I used to cringe at some of the things he would say or tell me about his so called friends.
It also seems like they all use the same terminology to describe their former victims, Like;
* Weirdo/ ugly/ stuck up = they won’t respond to my flirting, or they rejected me already. Zero supply offered, and it irritates me because it interferes with my delusion of being irresistible.
* Total psycho = they seem to be fully aware of what I’m all about, so I have to smear their reputation in case they might be exposing me.
* I’m worried sick about him/ her = I’m currently targeting this individual.
Please agree to be my flying monkey, spy and collect info about them, then report back to me.
* He/ she constantly accused me of made up stuff I never did = I definitely did those things, I do them every time, but this time I got caught.
* He/ She played mind games/ power plays = I tried to do all those things to them, but it failed. I can never fail though, so I project my failed attempts on them.
Just to name a few
Thank you.
NM bought her supply when she got old.
Before I even knew what narcissism was I remember it hitting me around my mom's 60th birthday. She got oddly upset that people in her life weren't planning some kind of big party for her 👀 even though we literally never had big parties for anyone's birthdays. Last year was her 70th and yet again no big party, I wonder if she took that personally lol.
Being disappointed that no one makes a fuss over milestone birthdays hardly qualifies someone as a narcissist. Seems like you're being a little hard on your mom.
My mother is the same - on all her calendars "MY BIRTHDAY!!". Acts like the Queen or something.
@@floridagirl5250 This is the tip of the iceberg. When I was having a miscarriage my mom told me I was being gross for talking about my period. I grew up with very poor self esteem due to her constant criticism. She almost tried to make me drop out of college a year before graduation because I made a paperwork mistake. So please don't try to gaslight me by saying I'm the one with a problem. Thanks.
@@floridagirl5250 lol. yeah, it does.
@@moldypotatochip I wasn't trying to gaslight you. The other things are way worse than the bday. Settle down!
I (1973) VERY recently discarded a flying monkey older best friend of mine (1957)!who fit into the category of the aging narcissist. No offense to the 60 plus people. I'll be there in no time at 47. But some of the older folks went through what she's talking about and this is a good video and you'll surely have you soul refilled by AS WELL by this one. Especially if you had a few of those types try to take you down lately like I did.
Narcissist parents conspiring with secret flying monkey SPY, who pretends to be a fellow scapegoat. Who starts preaching their stuff, all a sudden, that goes against their own beliefs.. can anyone say "dog whistling" when it doesn't come to racism? This is one of those cases. It's the way of transparently talking shit about you with plausible deniability with code words. You'll kinda know it when it's happening. But you'll say to yourself if you're me, no way, not this person! Some fellow scapegoats are just narcissists in training. Be careful and let go of them once they show their true colors!
Scapegoats are the truth tellers. Golden children become the narcs.
Im trying to figure my mother out. The emotional abuse between a mother that hates her daughter is real , it hurts even at my age. She has gone back in time , playing mind games with herself and using me as a target .
before i began a journey of recovery from narc abuse, i might have believed my grandmother was a narc. she had a toughness to her when i was young. she was loving in a tough way. very irish. the years before she passed, i saw her very differently. in her last decades she was older and more frail, but i sensed an authenticity that surely means she was not a narc. maybe she had too many rules and feared germs too much, but she lived through the great depression.
she was a joy to me in her later years. and that was a blessing.
if narcs get worse as they age, then my biological mother and brother may each spontaneously combust. i honestly hope i never see or hear from either again.
i suspect i will have to be more proactive to avoid them indefinitely 🙁
Miss you're long hair, Jill. Thanks for taking the time to record these videos, they are very helpful after a year and a half of abuse that I had no understanding about what what and why it was happening
On the contrary I think it looks great!
You are right in everything you said. I have seen and experienced it. Thank you❤
Thank you Jill, this was a brilliant video. I really appreciate your work, you are helping so many ppl.
My mother was all three.
Whatever got her what she wanted
Once you know, YOU GO!
My mother-in-law exactly...to the tune of several hundreds of thousands of dollars.
They ran it up hey
OH!!!!!!! I NEEDED to hear this today!!!!!!!
One again, another great video! I love listening to your advice while I’m driving. It has helped me more than you know!
I'm very curious what story my adopted mother conjured up, once she realized I was gone/absent (I'm 67 yrs) and not coming back into her life for any reason. Her toxic abusiveness has only intensified as she has aged (94 yrs). The latest tidbit that infuriated her was my choice not to get the jab. She was practically gnashing her teeth at me, belittling and carrying on. . Until she hung up on me. It's futile trying to please her at this stage. I'm done! And I've never felt better.
They become like the Grinch That Stole Christmas! You don't want to be in their cross heirs you will be public enemy number 1. They will gaslight and manipulate you with word salad and everything else in their tool box of goodies!
So true... perfectly said and explained.
Are they more susceptible to Alzheimer's / dementia? My mother has full-blown NPD and has early-stage Alzheimer's/dementia.
This was amazing, Jill. You explained this exactly.
Wonderful video!! I agree 💯!
My father all over! Thank you Jill 😘
So true thank you
My narc husband is approaching 70. All of our children keep distance from him (he hasn’t seen or spoken to one for 7years). He keeps saying I worked hard all my life to raise children who act like my enemies. He cannot grasp the fact that his behavior drove them away. He also worked for his own self aggrandizement, me and the children were hardly given a thought except to take frustration out on. If I was interested in his well-being I would try to explain all of this but I am not and know FOR SURE he would never understand that he had brought this all on himself. In the meantime I hardly see my kids and have to listen to his endless repetition of how hard done by he is.
My mother use hugs as a form of narcissistic supply. I had to stop hugging her, which is so bizarre and she freaks out and tries to emotionally manipulate me to give her a hug. It is really sad.
Great video ❤❤
Yep, one of my coworkers is an "aging narcissist." Good grief, she is absolutely pathetic. She goes to exorbitant lengths to convince people she's the hero, victim, or martyr. I can not stand her. Most nobody can either. Just her mere presence is enough to make your skin crawl, ugh!!
Thanks.
Excellent. Bull's eye! Thank you. I tolerated his progressive madness here, but as you said, the older they get, the more bizarre their delusional world becomes too much to take. At my 5th try to divorce, I finally made it out, so very exhausted that I barely made it to the court... Now looking back, I am convinced that these creatures are possessed by some very powerful dark, vampiric forces. The mastery in flipping the reality and into so very creative narratives... and this is what empowered my ex, watching me falling into the same trap, then his sadism stepped in, feeding on my emotional pain through such ''rituals' of energy extorsion. This was all beyond a human comprehension for me. I side with the demonic possession of a loser who trades his dying soul and becomes a host to such demonic parasitic energies of destruction.
My dad always acted like he was the biggest bad ass and had to fight with everyone his whole life and won every fight. Now days he has a hard time keeping his mouth shut and embarrassing his family and starting fights where they're not needed and plays the victim roll very well.
I literally learned the word martyr from researching what tf was wrong with my mother when I was a teenager. Thankfully she cut me off a couple of years ago by lying about and being in denial about why my niece no longer sees her, and blaming me. She texted that she would never forgive me, and I haven’t bothered replying.
Through their lack of insight they look at accomplishments and why are they not better off financially. They become angry because they have nothing to show for their life. (Judgment, insight are lacking); they attempt to rationalize everything. It due to their deficits. But they always deflect rather than accept responsibility for many situations. I have seen psychotic events in the middle age 58 yr old female narcissist. She was convinced she heard creatures in the wall. After 1/2 hour i said take you tranquilizer there is nothing in the wall. To my suprise she took the pill.
Your right. The evil narcissist must be left in the world of and not limited to “You’re the cause now you’re feeling the effects.” And then walk away.ℹ️💯✅❤️✝️🙏🏿📖🗡👊🏿👌🏿👍🏿🥷☯️😎
Spot on! My MIL was the victim when she had to declare bankruptcy years ago. She owned 4 properties and had no job. FIL was working part time. She lost his family land because she had to build a house on their land to replace the mobile home. But it wasn’t her fault. She was a victim of the housing bubble. She did illegal things to protect her homes and lost her H’s family land. It was sad.
I have to admit, I feel a little sorry for my ex. It's getting harder for him to get his supply. He wants to be seen as the hero. He will always make sure everyone knows about whatever wonderful thing he just did to help someone. But now, most people who know us probably realize there is a good reason why I broke up with him. That he isn't as wonderful as he makes himself out to be. I haven't told many people just how badly he hurt me, but I have told him. And he has to live with the knowledge that to his most recent partner, he is no hero. He's almost 70 now. His prospects for a new partner are running down.
Good advice: never, ever feel sorry for a narcissist. These cowardly, boundary-breaking, scheming, victimizing parasites have made an entire living off of fair minded and empathetic people: we own them nothing. Each of us is responsible for a life: our own. Deny the narc your empathy: the narc is blind to it anyway.
I've watched this video several times. Both my DNA donors are narcissist. They are very enmeshed with me and a large brood of enablers and golden children. No Contact 6.5 years now (from ALL of Them) and I still get an occasional Christmas or birthday card just to ruin my day. I usually don't open them. I opened one recently from my NF, which said "merry christmas, and stay safe" with a check for $100. He's just barreling on through with his Total Denial of any wrong doing and playing the endless game of Pretend. Pretending that his behavior is not abuse. Pretending that I'm going to put up with it ever again etc...I've recovered a lot and it still makes me shake my head every time I witness their complete denial of reality and their refusal to change and grow too.
I tore the check up.
Way to go! I should of gone no contact at least that long ago. It’s been two days since I’ve finally committed for the first time to go no contact from my narc parents. I worked for my father for years, he stole thousands from my wife and kids. I think I will do the same (rip up a check or bill) if I get one from them. I went no contact on my birthday so I may just get the chance. If I wasn’t following the rules of no contact, I’d send them a video of me burning the check or bill and give them more to gossip about but hey, that’s just petty. I can’t believe it took me so long to go no contact
OMG, same here! Thanks for sharing.
II just recently moved from a home that was being rented from a 70+ year old decomposing and delusional psychopath. Not only did he and his wife attempt to (infiltrate) and inmesh themselves into my personal life, but continuously violate my boundaries. He retaliated by shutting off the breakers which provided power to three areas of the home (claiming shorts) and forced me to live without any heat or hot water to bathe for almost five straight months. When legally held accountable, he continued to avoid accountability and to prevent exposure, he's played the victim, martyr and hero. He's been extremely vindictive and has continued to retaliate by not only inventing some of the most ridiculous and delusional stories that aren't true, but called me crazy, lunatic, paranoid and insane. He's also started running some hideous smear campaigns to attack my character, emotional, psychological and mental stability. He's a racist who thinks himself superior, so rules and laws don't apply to him and on Tuesday he will be served to appear in court for believing himself entitled to keep my large security deposit.
The ex narc blamed me for his premature aging. And he looked older. After I left him he aged looks older and hard looking.
Yes, he aged 10 years while I glowed up and look better!
@@annmaddock4569 so did I..lol
I hope you realize...it's not your problem. 😊
@@jeanettecook1088 ya ur right not my problem..😊
Thank you for this. I need to get more information on the aging narcissist. All the videos I watch talk about affairs, posting on Facebook, etc. Although I want to get as much information as I can. All that talk about Facebook posts just isn't my circumstance. No mistresses, no Facebook posts, no flying monkeys. None of that stuff. I need a video that will address older people that aren't into technology and had no friends. (Meaning no flying monkeys, no smear campaigns, no affairs, nothing that involves other people.)
Can you talk more about this type of person?
Oh my goodness you are spot on! ♥️
Blessings
Thankyou
Is it common for someone to relive false episodes of times with the narcissist in different styles? Thank you for your time and doing what you do.
I'm in need of a NPD support group as well as a therapist. I'm preparing to leave but I need help.
She’s been back ; she misses me said she : but at her expense . She’s been used and she loves it
Why do you know or care about the cost to her? Her behaviour will always come at YOUR expense for as long as you allow it. Put her out. Shut the door of your home, mind & heart & don't re-open until it has moved on to a new victim. (This won't take long but you must hold firm). That's what i did, i only wish i did it sooner. The years they consume will forever be remembered as years wasted!
@@richarddebono7092 I totally agree
At some point, hate to add more pain to what you're feeling, we have to get fed up with ourselves for taking more abuse from these sickos. I promise you she'll do their favorite trick of all: PULL THE RUG FROM UNDER YOUR FEET when all is going well. Something will be said or done to the point where you just cannot reconcile the cognitive dissonance within yourself anymore. BUT IF YOU WANT MORE OF THE PREDICTEDABLE MEAN/SWEET CYCLE, BE MY GUEST. (I used to subject myself to this too-- until I finally wised up with a few.)
Describes my dad to a T. Greg Chaney in coastal N.C
You are gorgeous Jill😊
Thank you for your content. It is quite useful. However I must add that even though you are highly accurate in many ways...there is one way in which you slightly forget. That if you are a true master of your own reality/destiny, you can form/shape even the harder core narcs into something more benign, kind of think of it like how the Jedi can mind influence those who are less evolved in their simplistic thinking. Although it is WISE to understand that this takes MOUNDS of self-work, and highly spiritually advanced practices...so your advice IS SAFEST for the vast majority. Also thinking about - is the effort worth the endeavor, after all expending this kind of energy on changing or protecting yourself from others in such ways is often simply super-ceded by merely removing yourself from such abusive/manipulative personalities presence. As it is the path of least resistance I guess you could call it.
Old young it doesn't matter they are always the victim, and once they get older they half to change up their game 👍 up Happy Easter everyone.
I didn't realize it was Ishtar the Fertility Goddess day. I don't keep up with the pagan "holi-days" anymore. Haven't for years.
My old neighbor told the cops she called on me that I put a hit out on her!!! Cop said she's off her meds lol.THAT drove her nuttier!
Out of the blue after 50 years he told me I was getting old and he wasn't going to get taking care.of. Me pretty cold since I've taken care of his needs for years while he ran with his friends leaving me alone a lot of the te broke my heart
Love you Jill ❤️❤️❤️
You are living the greatest purpose, a bright and shining light showing the path of healing for us all to follow 🤍❤️🤍
Off topic, sorry, I just love that lamp behind you.
Thank you!
Oh my gosh, you've not only met my mother or our previous leader, they are one in the same.
You are soooo right
My narcissistic husband is playing the victim. He still manipulates he still tries to contact me. We are divorced. He still text me and calls me names and tells me I’m not capable of being independent, or taking care of myself that I have to sell the house because he wants half the money so he could live his Substance-abuse lifestyle and go out with young girls. He’s 73 years old. And his only interest is getting high and going out with younger women. And he’s trying to take everything away from me and saying that I cannot take care of myself. And since we got the divorce and I’m on my own, I feel much better. I look much better I’m healthier. I can’t get rid of him no matter what not even with the divorce
My NF is likely to have embezzled an account of mine?
These demons are the nursing home’s nightmare
They’re also difficult imposing and self absorbed neighbors in senior income based housing, calling other residents at 5 am, bragging about how they hide their income so as to not pay their legal fair share of rent costs, how others are jealous of them, and all they ever talk about is themselves, rarely if ever asking how someone else is, always have to be right, knowitalls, braggarts, delusional, totally 💯 percent selfish and self absorbed time and energy thieves, Avoid them, and don’t take their calls
My mother will play the victim and, unfortunately, might be easy for her.
She will play the victim of me, because I’ve gone no contact and the entire family felt that I should be the fall girl anyway so, she has a willing audience, particularly in my sister, who is still likely engaging with her.
If the news that I went no contact got out to people who respected my stepfather’s work, she’d paint the picture that I had my priorities out of order or was crazy, because I decided to get a regular job and didn’t use every inch of my life to perpetuate his work or the work of both of my parents. There are many who’d will believe her to be right. They wouldn’t know or care that, under my mother’s iron fist and because the business depended upon my stepfather being alive, that it was no longer sustainable, let alone sustaining for the family. They wouldn’t care that she was simply using her kids as casualties where, if the business succeeded, it was her success and if it failed, it was our failure. They wouldn’t care, if we lost everything trying to support it, while she did just fine, living off her assets and social security.
Her neighbors may have wondered where I disappeared to and, almost, who my sister is.
A lot of this is because many people who knew my stepfather’s work or are my mother’s neighbors are getting on in age themselves. There’s the generational divide and, yep, many parents who’ve had working lives themselves, I suspect, seem to wonder just where their children are, when the parents should be their first and only priority. Well, they’re probably WORKING. Working harder for less than their parents have. But, parents don’t see and believe that, because they often become myopic, as they age, if not entirely narcissistic. Those of us who have demanding, aging narcissistic parents know that no one else cares about “no contact”. No contact is simply seen as abandonment. No one else cares whether your parent doesn’t have any dementia at all and is just an absolutely wretched nightmare. They simply feel that your parents are the most “for better or for worse” relationship you’ll actually have. So you may find that there is NOTHING an aging, narcissistic parent isn’t the victim of and that everyone’s cutting their eyes at you, in wonderment about how you couldn’t fix it all, even if the parent is destroying everything in their path.
Nailed it. These wicked narcs pretty much get away with all their wickedness in this life (but not the next). The next one will last for a lot longer than 80-100 years.
Private private ,your comments are so true in my experience.
Growingandlearning perhaps so and I’m glad that it resonates with people sometimes but, am more so saddened that so many are going through similar or the same.
We’d all be far happier to have loving, normal, happy relationships with our aging parents. It was certainly what I’d looked forward to, understanding that, if I didn’t die first, I’d be there for her, when she passed. But, I couldn’t comprehend what was brewing and I’d almost rather it just be dementia. But, when I look back, even with a recent revelation, yep, what is evidentiary stretches back to 20+ years ago, when she was a fully-functional person, providing all the more reason to write her off.
@@privateprivate8366 Yeah, everyone just says, "That's how old people are." Absolutely NOT true. My mother-in-law had dementia and she was a loving mother to both her son and me and her other three kids. My mother has been cold, calculating, conniving -- sabotaging my career, even though she was the one who WANTED me to go to medical school -- stealing mutual funds from me without any remorse, leaving me with capital gains taxes, so many things.... and it was not dementia. It wasn't until I told my husband some of the things she did when I was a child that I understood.... the woman did not love me. EVER. No contact has been my survival. Sabotaging my job was tantamount to stealing money from my kids. My innocent kids. No contact ensures that a grown adult who had 78 years to know better does not get to abuse her own grandchildren. My mother-in-law is my role-model for parenting now. I am grateful for her wisdom, and the way she has shown me to grow old with grace. My mother, on the otherhand, is like a cartoon. Except she is my mother. No contact, people. It's the only way to survive them. It's not just me she's hurt. She took advantage of my dad. She's horrible to everyone. No one deserves her abuse. NO ONE.
Omg you look so cute with your new haircut!
I Learned the hard way 😂🎉
Yes!
Truth.
The narcissist I just got away from would have these unbelievable tantrums via text and if I just ignored him, he would tell me how cruel I was for sitting back and just watching him fall apart.
I'd be the villain....yet he'd have just said that he couldn't live without me in his life and threaten suicide and say that I would be to blame.....this was a man in his late 40s.
I dread to think what he'll be trying to pull in his 50s because I sure as hell won't be around for it
I went to a family Christmas Party. When I got home, my ex started a melt down because he could not reach me. We were done by 12.31, when I realized he'd sent me a catfished photo of his "son."
Jill! Why did you cut your hair??? You look amazing anyway 💗💗💗💗
Just needed a change.
The narcissist and the ego/false self or synonymous/same thing.. Rise above your ego and awake
They are who they are.
My parents and there friends plus some of my co workers they do the most Im 40 I know I will get there age my 22 year old make sures I know Im not in the 20s anymore
Where is part one?
In the list of videos.
Is it possible to become a narcissist after decades of narcissistic abuse ?
After extensive research... Literally everyone is a narcissist...
Not everyone, just most. We are in the end times and the wicked outnumber the righteous by a landslide. Two seperate seedlines at "enmity" with one another....Genesis 3:15. Cain vs Seth. The "rhogam shot" gave the narcs the advantage. God designed His (non narc) daughters bodies to reject and miscarry narc babies (genetic aberrations) and so the psychopathic narc scientists designed the "rhogam shot" to over ride this natural selection process so that now the bad seed outnumbers the good seed.
I think as humans we are naturally flawed, we all have had and still have some characteristics of narcissistic behavior but it's one ability to have a sense of self and internal reflection. Making yourself accountable and striving to change not change others. The constant struggle of life, feed the ego or feed the soul. Turn your will over to God
How is it you know my ex-wife so well?
My step father was so delusional in his old age that he tried to convince people that in Africa there were insects bigger than houses. Delusion + not a very high IQ = immense stupidity. When someone dared to confront this ridiculousness he lost his temper and shouted at them for how arrogant they were.
It’s hell on earth
Interestingly the martyr is the hero and the victim combined
I cant believe i let acrazy child ruin my life 😅😊 nothing to do now but try to enjoy what yrs i have left.
Absolutely when they age , They forget there lies , and are worried of that ! They lose controle over them self and complaining that they get older ! Yes I know why ? haha ;-) Happy Easter everyone .
These 2 videos have been very helpful, TY. Nice rack btw.
Yes, crazy making@@?
that was good advice but it was extremely redundant and the video cravings shorter as a result or you could’ve actually made notes and helped you clearly express some of the other things that were left out as a result first of all they’re ugly not only and behavior but those bad feelings actually caused bad hormones and they become ugly as a result that’s not me being hateful that’s just me saying if you’re older you’re not as pretty as used to be and you’re also dealing with a different age group who is more seasoned who’s got more experience so it’s less likely that an older woman is going to believe your bullshit as opposed to a younger woman now my ex narcissist of 2 1/2 months because I have so much experience with narcissists and I’ve learned to spot them in a crowd happens to tell me at the age of 54 that if it doesn’t work out and I’m supposed to be the last person he’s with knowing him for 32 years… He’s going to end up chasing after 35/40 year old woman
So why do you think that is?
Because the asshole isn’t going to be able to sell his bullshit to a woman of my age
And believe me he has a lot of it I’m surprise he doesn’t live in the middle of the pasture
When we were younger and we hung out a lot he was very quiet almost seemed shy but I could see his little tantrums and tempers poking through they weren’t in mirable then but he wasn’t as brazen or impatient he was seasoning himself as a experienced narcissist another last 25 years I’m not talking he’s gotten to the point of having no fucks he has no patience is what he has
He wants what he wants and he wants it now and he doesn’t give a shit how you feel about it you are going to be his target and you’re gonna give him what he wants point-blank
He told me feelings are not facts
Not only that but he didn’t see the point in me looking to improve the aesthetics of his hoarding because that doesn’t make a difference in the world so then I guess his hoarding does? The other thing to look out for is if people like this cannot find a human to steal energy from they will have an animal and you can tell by the state of that animal exactly who that person is because an animal will always be a mirror
So I get there and the dog is dying simple case to solve the dog is infested with fleas he’s 54 and he’s never seen a flea before? I highly doubt that
House is covered in blood this dog is dripping blood that’s how bad the infestation was Tim when he shakes his blood splatters all over the walls and everything that’s nearby the house smelled like blood
As a result the dog was severely anemic what I’m gonna tell you if you don’t know anything about animal totems any kind of bloodsucking insect whether to bedbugs scabies fleas or ticks is probably a good indication that you were in the presence of a narcissist
I ended up having to go work and out of my pocket by flea treatment for this dog get him to give the dog several baths and start him on a supplemental plan to restore his blood using super foods that were adequate for canines
A lot of cleansing a lot of healing and a lot of love which I won’t even really touch on this except for the fact that when I went to touch his animal he froze and locked
He looked like he was in agony and it’s because he had been emotionally starved for almost 14 years of his life at least the last 12 because that’s how long the narcissist was alone with this animal and this animal had no connection or contact with other humans
Pay attention if a dog is younger and not debilitated as the one I’m describing because this dog could actually through body language show you that the person you’re about to enter face which is dangerous and chances are happens to be a narcissist amongst other things
I had this experience when I was doing rideshare and I was relatively young in my experience… I had picked up a man who was telling outlandish stories didn’t want me to leave kept trying to talk me into his house and of course I was an interested but I’m highly intuitive so I was listening to that intuition
After trying to drop him off he made me take him back to the gas station so he could get some things and his intention supposedly was to feed me which I wasn’t hungry
When that didn’t work he tried to get me into the darker part of his backyard and he used his dog as they I did open my door and stand next to my car and as I took a step or two towards the gate leading into the backyard the dog dropped on his front legs down to the ground with his butt up in the air showed all of his teeth and was growling and in attack mode facing his human
To this day and that’s almost 7 years later I believe had eight steps in that backyard that man would’ve done bad things to me drug me in the house and I wouldn’t be here to leave this comment today
Narcissism can be a very deadly issue that’s another thing that’s not mentioned here it’s almost treated as if it’s just a nuisance
If this person has all nine traits they can be deadly but they only have to have five to be that and you don’t have to be a professional psychologist or psychiatrist to look for those signs and listen to your intuition which should be telling you to run like hell to break all contact and to not have anything to do with that individual again
Moving forward anybody that is out here trying to date or even meet people on a regular do not give out your personal information of any kind not your last name don’t talk about your family don’t talk about your past experiences don’t post any personal information on your social media Probably don’t even add those new people to your social media where they can extrapolate information about your family take pictures and put them in a private folder which is what my last one was doing and stocking people online including you these people are mental they’re not like other people that you know they’re emotionally and mentally unstable and unpredictable
Because they’ll use the information against you when they’re abusing you and some people are too much of an open book
Too trusting too naïve
But you don’t wanna expose your friends or family to these people either so be very cautious moving forward and if you’re on dating networks I promise you 98% of people on there are narcissistic and they have other mental disorders and some of those can be a very deadly combination I wouldn’t even put myself out there that way
If I didn’t know this about a person I’ve known for 32 years what makes you think you’re going to know anyone truly even after living with them because I lived with him for a year and then again for a couple of months and I knew there was something off I just didn’t see all of it I did listen to my intuition and I went about my business
But in this day and age it really is becoming a progressive problem and they will be all over social media all over dating networks all over sexual meet ups
You don’t know who you’re dealing with so the best thing for you to do is be smart and don’t interact with these people keep your interactions to the people you know well and watch for the signs and symptoms and if you don’t know what those nine traits are or should I say red flags?
Find out what they are and there should be a list in every description box of every video that you post on this channel showing all nine traits and there should be a reference to open that description box to take a look
We are living in some very scary times and I’m not suggesting to be scared I’m suggesting to be proactive and forearmed as well as to initiate common sense at every turn