In our belief system, we wouldn't have sex before marriage. So, when I met my partner, and it was clear that we were a match, we got married within 6 months. We just celebrated our 17 year marriage anniversary at the end of December. It has NOT been easy, but all these years and 3 kids later, here we are...
This is awesome, congrats!🙌🏼💗 My hubs asked me to marry him 2 weeks after we met, 6 months later, we were married. It hasn’t been easy by any means, but here we are with 2 grown kids and 27 years later😅
Yes! Someone who sees you beyond how you look, beyond what people around you say, beyond your worldly attributes. Its not the one that calls me beautiful and intelligent that sparks light in my heart but the one who notices the snort at the end of my laugh, the face I make when I’m thinking, the fist I make when I’m anxious, the light I bring into a room with my calmness, my love for lights and flowers, etc! The good with the bad and loves me all that much more for it! And vice versa 🥰 that’s what I want! #WorthTheWait
I haven't tuned into Jordin in years but seeing this I have to say I'm so happy for her. She went through a lot with Jason Derulo and she deserved so much better. She clearly got better!!!
@@Simz199x He had a near fatal accident that fractured his neck. Apparently he was almost paralyzed. Jordin basically nursed that man back to health. And he basically cheated and treated her horribly in the end. Even after she married and had her child, he was quoted saying how they aren’t friends. And this is after all she did for him.
Addriene hit it on the nail!! Its that simple!! My hubby of 32 years wasnt my bff but he is the love of my life beside my 3 kids . My heart still gets beating fast when i see him!! I also feel that for me.
5 is honestly crowded. We won't hear from them all or it won't be in-depth. They'll end up rushing just for the next person to speak or to go into commercial break. I like Jordin too but I rather she is a guest or replace someone that quits.
Me too because the men that I dated or not dated it was always about them so I dumped them 😂😂. They didn’t see me and didn’t care to see me. I don’t waste my time…. I’m too celibate and single. These men out here be running game acting like they know me after a few days when they don’t and they married with kids or got someone. They are just focused on how quick they can attempt to use me but I don’t let it happen and they get mad when they can’t play me. 😐
@@lifeisbeautiful9455 I pray you meet someone who see's you and loves you through it all. Someone you can be free with and you know always has your best interest at heart. I am with someone who makes me feel the same way they described and I feel so blessed. Celibate till marriage too x
I love that this topic came up especially that I got married 12/22/21 🥰. Marriage may not be for everyone but it is definitely worth the wait for the right person.
Absolutely love Jordin . I adore the idea of marriage but yeah I do feel like it has become Almost a rule in relationships after a certain amount of years versus identifying the reason for the union in the first place
@@arnitaxavier9446 it's only uncomfortable if the whole idea is misused, like pple using it as fraud..but my dad says it was a tradition meant to 'take care' of the parents.and ofcos an event to make the two families from both sides one..
Same for me Adrienne and Jordan. When I got married I knew/felt this man loves me for me bad/good and he makes me feel safe and secure, I knew no matter what I want this man in my life.. We got married at 25 yrs old so of course things haven't been perfect but we have learned to grow together and I love him more today than ever (13 yrs marriage, 19 yrs together).
Jordin's reason for getting married is exactly what I want for me. And I can relate to Jordin on so many levels. This conversation reminds me of Jordin's song, "Worth The Wait". My favorite song from her hands down!
When thinking of getting married I always asked myself " Would I want a child that acts like him"? We can assume someone will be a good dad but we don't know that for sure. So you have to look at their personality good and bad.
YES!! Thankyou! I’ve said this before.. do I want my future kids to embody my spouse’s traits?! Great point that’s not discussed enough. Some people think, oh they treat me nice and it’s been awhile so it’s time to be married. Ummm are they patient, morally sound, healthy? Those are more important.
Because I’m a Christian, my views of marriage are biblical because I believe marriage was designed by God. With that being said… I’m 27 and have never been married. I’ve been proposed to and I’ve had 3 boyfriends WANT to marry me, but I won’t settle. I know what characteristics I need in a husband. I’d rather stay single than settle. That’s how much I value the sanctity of marriage.
@@xxsnxx0037 Oh yeah. People make negative comments all the time about how I have unrealistic expectations for a man and how I’m somehow running out of time to get married in my 20s. Especially when I mention how I’ve turned down the opportunity to get married multiple times.
Right I have to agree with you ladies Once u know u got a good partner a good person stick by that person love that person unconditionally don’t get with somebody because of their money that wouldn’t end well that’s so true
I use to hope that I will be married in my 20’s . I am now 28, still not married. And I’m actually okay with that. It’s not a must. I’m glad that I am waiting on God to just bring me the right one. For me
Don't rush marriage especially when you're young. Take your time to get to know and love the mate you're with. Grow with him/her. 30s to me is a nice time to be married cause you're at the stage of your life where you're mature enough to know what you want who you are
Same! I’m 25, thought I’d be married by 28, and maybe I will be. But I also thought I would have been dating the person for 3-4 years prior to getting married and mathematically, that isn’t really possible anymore 😂 anyway, I pray that we find favor in Gods eyes always and our “Adam” or “Boaz” finds us. Remember to pray, walk in step with Gods words, and lean on Him and not your own understanding .
I'm 27 and a lot of people around me are getting married, sometimes I feel like I'm late but I know that God knows what I need and every time I get the opportunity to date I don't see what I am looking for. Gods timing.
I have to admit that I haven’t been watching the Real as consistently as I have in the past but….hey Producers, if you see this comment, if you hire Jordin Sparks I will watch everyday! She fits right in, she’s well spoken and I believe she will bring something fresh to the show 💗
I agree, Jordin Sparks brings substance and that show NEEDS it. When Tamera left, I stopped watching. Tamera was classy, intelligent and well spoken. The show is very boring and feels old.
Marriage isn’t about femininity or a women’s choice to be married. Marriage is an institution designed by God that reflects His Bride (The Church-The Kingdom, followers of Christ) and the love He has for The Bride, (and the coming together of both when Jesus returns) in the Earth. Marriage of The Lord is also an assignment and Holy Covenant. Last thing, and I say this lovingly, the choice to be yolked with a person with no regard of destiny in mind, going through the mundane “structure” of what society calls love and relationship is a waste of precious time that God has given all of us.
@@moimeself1088 Anything made official, is put into documentation, right? Technically, you don't even exist without a birth certificate and a social security number. Of course, non-religious people get married. That doesn't negate any of what the initial commenter has written.
In my culture a dowry is extremely important. To us it symbolizes that you respect the lady , you value her and honor her. You’re saying to her family and your family that you have now become one big family.To us when no dowry is given it shows that the man is irresponsible. Of course dowry varies from family to family though there are some symbolic items but conclusively dowry needs to be given no matter how small or gigantic. I also think premarital counseling is very important some people call it couples therapy.
She is perfect ! I think many women have guest hosted and have been perfect fits… but she speaks with such clarity & is so soft spoken but gets her point across ! She’s not judgmental… she’s transparent , she’s vulnerable ! Like she to me is the equivalent of Tamera and I feel like if we had Jordin as a permanent semi host where she could fill in anytime a host is missing it would be perfect !
@@tiffaneysearcy9073 LaToya would have to guest host first to be added 😂 I think them having guest hosts enables to see what type of chemistry can be made on screen and see how the audience responds ! Versus just adding a host that’s never really been at the table or on the show
Yes Adrienne I have recognized u have been doing self care/therapy etc...the last two years since Covid...u have grown A LOT is wat I have been saying in comments...I can tell...huge difference! And yes couples therapy for maintenance...is great for the relationship!
It kinda shock me wen she said unconditional love. N the horn beeped. That musta been a sign that wasn't true. Cause women and men don't unconditional.
If you find someone and believe that they are your partner for life...you should demonstrate that trust by marrying them. As a Christian man, I wouldn't like to cohabit with someone in a relationship for years...without sealing it with a marital covenant
Let’s not start the 5th cohost comments pls. If it’s not broke don’t fix it … this show is perfect just the way it is. Garcelle, Loni, Jeannie and Adrienne… we don’t need another one. Shall I continue to remind y’all how hard y’all vouched for Amanda ?
Completely agree. I remember when Amanda was a guest host and the comments were saying she should join permanently. But when she did, she got so much hate😅
Hold up let people just say how they feel. If they love Jordin and want her on the show then why not. I mean the same happened for Garcelle right and the show listened. This is exactly the same with Ana Navarro on The View. I agree maybe the show shouldn't jump head first but let them consider it at least. Jordin does jel well with the show.
People are changing the definition of marriage. We have evolved from civil marriage contracts to romantic marriages and everything in between. It's great to see folks marrying for not only love but a true partnership. I have friends who write their own marriage contracts so it's all on the table.
I just love seeing Jordin, she definitely is the example of , wholesome.... you know, like she's not the average young female celebrity, she hasn't been ran through by this rapper or that baller, she's just a nice young lady , and in Hollywood that can't be easy !
@Day poor choices? Why do they have to be poor? She was just living her life. And if she hadn’t made those decisions, she wouldn’t be who she is today.
@Day How was Jason Derulo an industry hookup? They were a couple for years and she lost her virginity to him in her 20s. Her music and image has always been wholesome. She’s drama free and married. All in all, she definitely doesn’t seem like an industry standard girl.
You do have any insider knowledge of the very people you are putting down to compliment Jordin. Ran through, is a terrible way to describe women or anyone. Compliments focus on one person and what makes them wonderful, they are not a comparison to whatever others may have gone through/are.
I don’t think I can get married. As a disabled man, I don’t have marriage equality. This is a huge barrier for my community: get married or keep our needed medical insurance to stay alive. It is so unfair but it is the reality. Yes, some people get married but most are already over qualified and already have lost those “benefits.” Most disabled people are in forced poverty. We still do not have true marriage equality in America! I hate this society requirement on marriage when it still isn’t inclusive.
@@Uthiop hes saying he might not be able to get married because based on current marriage laws for disabled individuals, if they get married they lose their government assistance. Their partner has to become their sole caregiver financially.
I also hate that Adrienne said “it’s very Bridgeton” as if Dowry’s aren’t a global culture that has existed for thousands years but yeah let’s associate it with this dumb netflix show 🤦🏾♀️
Yeah, same lol. Typically reflective of viewing everything through the western lens - anything outside of the US and Europe (mainly Britain) doesn’t exist 🤷♀️ Also, wouldn’t be surprised if some people only just learned about dowry from Bridgerton lol.
@@JJ-mx3pd literally how embarrassing, it’s even worse when it’s poc people like imagine if I said “it’s very Taco Bell” while talking about Mexican street food as if Taco Bell invented the concept 🤦🏾♀️ (yes I know Adrienne isn’t Mexican) it’s an example
I know many people have already commented this but Jordan Sparks would be a great addition. I love this show and hearing different perspectives makes me more open minded.
From my personal experience, I didn't take the time I needed to really get to know my now ex-husband, I ignored all the red flags. Now I am going at my own pace, and I find that we should really think about what We really want and it not be based on what we can get out of a person.
Marriage is not just a commitment but a legal responsibility. Long-lasting and committed relationships can work just as well for many ,many years it is up to the goals of the relationship between the people that are in it.
I havnt seen Jordin on TV in awhile & I definitely think this could be something big for her. I would love to see her as a permanent co host on a show like this if not this one
Dowry is still common in my culture. Sometimes I wish, the real had different ethnicity guests with different culture so we can see and have a little understanding.
if you didn't know the back history of Adrienne's husband you would think he is 'holy'. He cheated on his wife and has 2 kids fathered outside his marriage and he is still considered to be a catch by her. makes you think what kind of values she appreciates
My husband and I just celebrated 10 years of marriage January 15th we have 3 children all girls I wouldn't change it for the world. Im 34 and he is 37. When you know what you want life it doesn't take long to know if marriage with someone is for you.
Jordin's comment is reckless as a married woman. She is advocating "shackin' up". Women who live with men aren't entitled to anything that isn't willed to them. She won't earn SSI credit from a live-in lover. Adrienne needs to be silent on the issue of marriage.
Never get married just because you got pregnant, if you need health insurance from a spouse maybe. However divorce can be expensive, plus you brought the poor baby into something that wasn’t ready.
I disagree with the not getting married just because the relationship is going “good”, but only for religious reasons. I won’t preach because I’m pretty sure we all know what the Bible says, but I do want to get married .. I feel like I have to really get to know the guy before we start dating. Friends before a relationship
Well considering that the first recorded marriage ceremony happened in Mesopotamia in 2350 B.C, I not sure about marriage originating from the bible. Plus during that era divorces, dowry existed aswell.
@@arnitaxavier9446 I think what the other person is trying to say is that God instituted marriage between a husband and his wife. Also, you didn't really contrast the other person's point given that the Bible doesn't only began at the birth of Jesus but starts off explains the very beginning of time as we know it.
@@tatianadaniel3569 Well that's the Christian belief. The people of Mesopotamia weren't Christian and didn't follow the Abrhamic religions. They existed before any of the monotheistic religions came about. So the Notion that God instituted the marriage between a husband and a wife is ridiculous. Also non of my ancestors were ever Christian and yet the tradition of marriage have existed for thousands of years.
@@arnitaxavier9446 I think I answered you under another person's comment. The ancient Mesopotamians believed in all kinds of gods. Jesus was not Iraqi (modern day Mesopotamian native). Jesus is Jewish. When reading the Bible, you have to know that it is a collection of books written, sometimes centuries in between one another. With that being said, Christianity ( the purpose of Jesus) actually began before the world began. This can get confusing , but if you're willing to listen, I wouldn't mind explaining it to you in a more simplified way.
I love being married! I’m 28 we are just about to celebrate 2 years! He is the love of my life, my best-friend, the first man to make me feel perfect the way I am and that no other woman comes before me! And our chemistry 🔥 he is it for me for life and God is in the center we waited until marriage 💍
@@tatianadaniel3569 there's people out there that say they don't want to get married cause it's not for them and that's ok. And if you want to be someone that doesn't want to get married and just be together. Than what's the whole point of being with someone if they don't want the same things as you do. That's what I meant when I said that marriage isn't for anyone.
@@susana01992 So, if the same principals needed in order to sustain a healthy marriage are needed in any other romantic rrelationship, what exactly is it about marriage that you think makes people hesitant?
Good discussion on the topic. I would have loved to see the perspective of a married woman who comes from a background that has arranged marriage and dowery requirements.
I got married because I was newly saved, and because of my previous life, to have guilt-free sex. Church Mothers said, "you a pretty young woman, you need a husband, and sex outside of marriage is wrong. What!!! So wanting to do the right thing church wise, I married. I loved him but I wasn't "in love" with him. Didnt realize right away, 17 yrs later and two kids (which I adore) I filed for divorce. I loved my in laws, they are good people and I still have connection with them. But before salvation, I never desired to be married or have kids, due to upbringing. But the best thing that came out of that union, was my babies and the Legacy of them and my grandchildren. Church folk have good intentions, but should allow people to figure out what God wants for their lives instead of the legalism and doctrines. That is the Holy Spirit's job to lead and guide the believer. Good intentions are not always the best and the motives are not always pure. Live and Let Live!!!
I can't help thinking that if Tam was asked this question, she'd be balling right now. Hahaha love that girl🤣. Great answers from the ladies. Is @jordinsparks guest co-hosting?
Awww!!!,😪....I'm hoping to someday meet my forever gentlemen soon....this made me want to cry....I've never been married so this gives hope at 49🙏🏽💕 I want the butterflies in the stomach type feeling with great chemistry...
If you don’t mind me asking, have you ever been in a long term relationship? If yes, what happened and why didn’t you marry him? I hope this doesn’t sound rude, I’m just curious and trying to learn from others where I can 🙏🏿
@@MsSugarlips21 yes I have in fact we have three children together,its a long story and I'd rather not get into it....I've definitely had some childhood trauma that I've had to heal from....
I agree with Jordan, its weird when I see people asking people when they getting married, especially celebrities. When its good chance they don't believe in marriage. It's not for everybody, I know people on both spectrums and both are happy. Long as both parties agree on what they want 🤷🏽♀
I’m not trying to be shady but I believe Adrienne married him because she thought she was better than the ex wife. She even said in a segment she is competitive with men’s ex’s
It wont last . Adrienne and genie.relationship. might be a few years but it won't be growing OLD together . but Jordin sparks I luv her and I see good things for jordin
After that breakup joryn and Jason derulo glad joryn went to therapy and worked on herself b4 marriage that way she escape bringing a broken person to the marriage for another person to fix and make whole which is impossible
I disagree with Jordin a poll showed men in non contractual marriages felt less obligated to their partner than those who have been married with vows and a signed agreement
In South Africa the dowry is actually tradition in the black culture, we choose our own partners though, it's not arranged, maybe way back in ancient times.
Y'all see a guest in one video you like what they have to say now you're begging for them to be a permanent host ...like slow tf down! Lol no one needs to be added, let these guests have their moments and it be just that.
In Botswana, 'dowry' is still a traditional practice that the majority of the population follows. It is also known as 'bogadi' or 'lobola'. It can come in the form of cows or money and is viewed as a way to show ceremonial commitment to the bride-to-be before the community and bring honor to her family. In another scenario, some males pay dowry for their children (male or female) if they are conceived out of wedlock and they, unfortunately, separate from (break up with) the mother of the child. This enables the child to be given the biological father's surname even if the mother decides to marry a different man.
I think in a time where now women are bossing up & don’t need a man to be secure like back in the day … but WANT a man that can m love on her and she can love on him and he’s her equal in todays time shows the progression we’ve made ! Listen marriage is a institution… it’s a business contract… from buying a house… to possibly investing into businesses together ( Kandi & Todd ) and even doing things that feed the soul like having a family together ! Marriage is what u make of it and not one marriage in this country or world is the same ! You create your own rules and try to abide by them and stay true to the vows u said & the oath you made under God and communicate and be prepared for the days to come no matter if it’s good or bad ! As long as you stay true to that person and your word then you got it !
In Nigeria in a way marriage is a must in our society, but we do have people who are happy without the whole marriage thing. Parent still receive bride price and still give out list of things needed before the traditional marriage can happen....at least where I'm from.
Jordin married because she wanted too. Adrienne got married for validation but I’m glad she’s happy and found a good partner because she definitely went through some heartbreaks.
I've really enjoyed Jordin Sparks on the show . She's so humble and her contributions have been nice to hear
AGREED!! she'd make the perfect fifth co-host!!
Love her too.
@@Anthony-fu6cl agreed!
Totally agree!
Jordin Sparks creates the same atmosphere on the show that Tamera did...I love her humility and aura.
agreed!! I haven't tuned into the show or clips since Tam Tam left but I watched the ones with Jordin and she's honestly great!
Yea they should consider her as a regular she is good
True, very true
Definitely not there two different people
They give off the same energy 🥰🥰🥰
Whew! When Jordan said “he was the first person to see ME!” I almost cried
me too.. 🥺
Yes! That was so deep... 😪
So true 💜🖤
I was holding back tears
And that's what we need
In our belief system, we wouldn't have sex before marriage. So, when I met my partner, and it was clear that we were a match, we got married within 6 months. We just celebrated our 17 year marriage anniversary at the end of December. It has NOT been easy, but all these years and 3 kids later, here we are...
In six months? Was it coz the sex was on hold until ...after marriage?
love this
Congratulations 👏 🎊 all continued God's blessings 🙌
Congratulations on 17 years. What an accomplishment! Keep going, I promise there’s nothing out here 😂😂
This is awesome, congrats!🙌🏼💗 My hubs asked me to marry him 2 weeks after we met, 6 months later, we were married. It hasn’t been easy by any means, but here we are with 2 grown kids and 27 years later😅
Love that Adrienne considers couple therapy as maintenance. The maintenance is always more important than the purchase.
Love this metaphor!
Beautifully said
Well she better, she married a man who was a cheater big @$$ cheater, . cheater cheat because taht is that character, not the woman they are with
I cried when she said he sees the real me cause in the generation we live in today it's hard to find someone who sees you
Facts
They are definitely out there. Pray on it. ♥️🙏🏾
Exactly 💯
Yes! Someone who sees you beyond how you look, beyond what people around you say, beyond your worldly attributes.
Its not the one that calls me beautiful and intelligent that sparks light in my heart but the one who notices the snort at the end of my laugh, the face I make when I’m thinking, the fist I make when I’m anxious, the light I bring into a room with my calmness, my love for lights and flowers, etc! The good with the bad and loves me all that much more for it! And vice versa 🥰 that’s what I want!
#WorthTheWait
So true! I can’t wait to have this 🙏🏾✨☺️
I haven't tuned into Jordin in years but seeing this I have to say I'm so happy for her. She went through a lot with Jason Derulo and she deserved so much better. She clearly got better!!!
I agree.I'm so happy and Jason used her 😢
Absolutely
What did Jason do to her?
@@Simz199x cheated etc
@@Simz199x He had a near fatal accident that fractured his neck. Apparently he was almost paralyzed. Jordin basically nursed that man back to health. And he basically cheated and treated her horribly in the end. Even after she married and had her child, he was quoted saying how they aren’t friends. And this is after all she did for him.
Addriene hit it on the nail!! Its that simple!! My hubby of 32 years wasnt my bff but he is the love of my life beside my 3 kids . My heart still gets beating fast when i see him!! I also feel that for me.
Oh my goodness! Reading your comment makes me want this! Lord I pray I get married to a man who still gives me butterflies years after we get married!
That's so sweet! You are blessed!
That's beautiful
@@Thatcher8888 Me too sis 😭
@@Thatcher8888 agreed 💯💯👏🏽👏🏽
Can we get a permanent cohost seat for Jordin? 5 ladies can still work!
5 is honestly crowded. We won't hear from them all or it won't be in-depth. They'll end up rushing just for the next person to speak or to go into commercial break. I like Jordin too but I rather she is a guest or replace someone that quits.
What they said about why they got married was soooo sweet! I really got tears in my eyes
Me too because the men that I dated or not dated it was always about them so I dumped them 😂😂. They didn’t see me and didn’t care to see me. I don’t waste my time…. I’m too celibate and single. These men out here be running game acting like they know me after a few days when they don’t and they married with kids or got someone. They are just focused on how quick they can attempt to use me but I don’t let it happen and they get mad when they can’t play me. 😐
@@lifeisbeautiful9455 I pray you meet someone who see's you and loves you through it all. Someone you can be free with and you know always has your best interest at heart. I am with someone who makes me feel the same way they described and I feel so blessed. Celibate till marriage too x
I love that this topic came up especially that I got married 12/22/21 🥰. Marriage may not be for everyone but it is definitely worth the wait for the right person.
Your wedding date is cool!
Congratulations! Blessings to you, your partner & your marriage! 🍾🥂💛
Congratulations!!
Aww Congratulations!!💖🍾
Loni calling Adrienne munchkin is so cute 🥰
Right? I love it🥰🥰🥰
Haven't seen show in awhile, can't believe how much weight Loni has put on.
Absolutely love Jordin . I adore the idea of marriage but yeah I do feel like it has become
Almost a rule in relationships after a certain amount of years versus identifying the reason for the union in the first place
I agree I feel that before marriage couples need to embrace the definition of a union first and what that means
@@mariekano9730 completely agree !
Agreed 💯💯👏🏽👏🏽
In most African countries dowry still exists and its a very respected culture
Oh yaaaas it's our thing...
Thank you for saying this! I was gonna say the same. And in India too
Honestly as a Zimbabwean myself, the whole thing makes me uncomfortable.
@@arnitaxavier9446 each to their own I guess. Ironically, I treasure it more now even though I grew up in a western country 🤷♀️
@@arnitaxavier9446 it's only uncomfortable if the whole idea is misused, like pple using it as fraud..but my dad says it was a tradition meant to 'take care' of the parents.and ofcos an event to make the two families from both sides one..
seeing and hearing Jordin on the show is a breath of fresh air. it would be awesome if she became a permanent host as she adds so much to the convos
I agree she could be the fifth person
I agree! they used to have 5 people in the past, and she has a soft heart that reminds me off Tamera who i miss I think she would be a great addition
Same for me Adrienne and Jordan. When I got married I knew/felt this man loves me for me bad/good and he makes me feel safe and secure, I knew no matter what I want this man in my life.. We got married at 25 yrs old so of course things haven't been perfect but we have learned to grow together and I love him more today than ever (13 yrs marriage, 19 yrs together).
I love how Loni calls Adrienne "Munchkin". 😂🤣♥️
Jordin's reason for getting married is exactly what I want for me. And I can relate to Jordin on so many levels. This conversation reminds me of Jordin's song, "Worth The Wait". My favorite song from her hands down!
Also a favourite of mine!
I hope that happens for you! Keep believing and living 😊🙏
@@walktalk_208 thank you so much for those amazing words.
When thinking of getting married I always asked myself " Would I want a child that acts like him"? We can assume someone will be a good dad but we don't know that for sure. So you have to look at their personality good and bad.
YES!! Thankyou! I’ve said this before.. do I want my future kids to embody my spouse’s traits?! Great point that’s not discussed enough.
Some people think, oh they treat me nice and it’s been awhile so it’s time to be married. Ummm are they patient, morally sound, healthy? Those are more important.
wow this is a really good way to look at it but also how do we factor in like mental health issues into this thought process?
Because I’m a Christian, my views of marriage are biblical because I believe marriage was designed by God. With that being said… I’m 27 and have never been married. I’ve been proposed to and I’ve had 3 boyfriends WANT to marry me, but I won’t settle. I know what characteristics I need in a husband. I’d rather stay single than settle. That’s how much I value the sanctity of marriage.
Are you JW?
Amen!
Do you feel pressured at all to be married?
@@MirrorSelfies I am a nondenominational Christian.
@@xxsnxx0037 Oh yeah. People make negative comments all the time about how I have unrealistic expectations for a man and how I’m somehow running out of time to get married in my 20s. Especially when I mention how I’ve turned down the opportunity to get married multiple times.
Right I have to agree with you ladies Once u know u got a good partner a good person stick by that person love that person unconditionally don’t get with somebody because of their money that wouldn’t end well that’s so true
I use to hope that I will be married in my 20’s . I am now 28, still not married. And I’m actually okay with that. It’s not a must. I’m glad that I am waiting on God to just bring me the right one. For me
My husband found me when I finally believed that God's plans for me are "good." I married at 32.
Don't rush marriage especially when you're young. Take your time to get to know and love the mate you're with. Grow with him/her. 30s to me is a nice time to be married cause you're at the stage of your life where you're mature enough to know what you want who you are
Same! I’m 25, thought I’d be married by 28, and maybe I will be. But I also thought I would have been dating the person for 3-4 years prior to getting married and mathematically, that isn’t really possible anymore 😂 anyway, I pray that we find favor in Gods eyes always and our “Adam” or “Boaz” finds us. Remember to pray, walk in step with Gods words, and lean on Him and not your own understanding .
I'm 27 and a lot of people around me are getting married, sometimes I feel like I'm late but I know that God knows what I need and every time I get the opportunity to date I don't see what I am looking for. Gods timing.
Same... thot I will be at 28. Rather got married at 31 to the loml 🥰
My aunt always says marriage isn't the it goal
You should marry when you're ready and have accomplished your goals
She's smart
Your aunt is smart.
Agreed 💯💯👏🏽👏🏽
Marriage is unique…. It’s not “the same” as a long term relationship.
THANK YOU!!
Linda, say that again!!
Totally agree
I love Adrienne's reason for getting married. ❤️
Being married and being in a "committed relationship" is not the same thing...
Jordin is sooooo beautiful and that hairstyle is fire
Ok
I have to admit that I haven’t been watching the Real as consistently as I have in the past but….hey Producers, if you see this comment, if you hire Jordin Sparks I will watch everyday! She fits right in, she’s well spoken and I believe she will bring something fresh to the show 💗
I agree, Jordin Sparks brings substance and that show NEEDS it. When Tamera left, I stopped watching. Tamera was classy, intelligent and well spoken. The show is very boring and feels old.
@@blairfamily9685 the show is good now.
@@melodyholt500 Maybe I will check it out. Thanks.
Yea, if you are waiting for sex, don’t rush into marriage. It’s hard to wait, but building that trust and friendship is important.
I agree I'm 36 almost 37 still single and never did that . Nobody talk to me becuz of it and I'm too religious . its such a shame. Men just want hoes
Wow, that’s so true that no matter what you’d want to maintain that bond and friendship 🥺
She literally looks like how she looked like in the music video for No Air 😍
Marriage isn’t about femininity or a women’s choice to be married. Marriage is an institution designed by God that reflects His Bride (The Church-The Kingdom, followers of Christ) and the love He has for The Bride, (and the coming together of both when Jesus returns) in the Earth. Marriage of The Lord is also an assignment and Holy Covenant. Last thing, and I say this lovingly, the choice to be yolked with a person with no regard of destiny in mind, going through the mundane “structure” of what society calls love and relationship is a waste of precious time that God has given all of us.
Marriage is a contract facilitated by the state. Non-religious people also get married, and they file the exact same paperwork with the state. 🤷🏾♀️
Well Said! God bless you
@@moimeself1088 Don't forget people who hold other religious beliefs too. Not everyone believes in the Christian God.
@@moimeself1088 Anything made official, is put into documentation, right? Technically, you don't even exist without a birth certificate and a social security number. Of course, non-religious people get married. That doesn't negate any of what the initial commenter has written.
@@arnitaxavier9446 Of course not everyone believes in Jesus. Nevertheless, marriage was still created by Jesus ( God in human form).
In my culture a dowry is extremely important. To us it symbolizes that you respect the lady , you value her and honor her. You’re saying to her family and your family that you have now become one big family.To us when no dowry is given it shows that the man is irresponsible. Of course dowry varies from family to family though there are some symbolic items but conclusively dowry needs to be given no matter how small or gigantic. I also think premarital counseling is very important some people call it couples therapy.
Is it just me or should Jordin be more permanent on the show
She is perfect ! I think many women have guest hosted and have been perfect fits… but she speaks with such clarity & is so soft spoken but gets her point across ! She’s not judgmental… she’s transparent , she’s vulnerable ! Like she to me is the equivalent of Tamera and I feel like if we had Jordin as a permanent semi host where she could fill in anytime a host is missing it would be perfect !
@@MajesticMyronn True she's more like Tamera
@@MajesticMyronn Jesus loves you!😊❤
@@tiffaneysearcy9073 LaToya would have to guest host first to be added 😂 I think them having guest hosts enables to see what type of chemistry can be made on screen and see how the audience responds ! Versus just adding a host that’s never really been at the table or on the show
Yes Adrienne I have recognized u have been doing self care/therapy etc...the last two years since Covid...u have grown A LOT is wat I have been saying in comments...I can tell...huge difference! And yes couples therapy for maintenance...is great for the relationship!
It kinda shock me wen she said unconditional love. N the horn beeped. That musta been a sign that wasn't true. Cause women and men don't unconditional.
From the initial question: the answer is no. People don’t take it seriously anymore.
True
PLEASE KEEP JORDIN SPARKS !!!
it’s great to have a younger but also mature Millennial in the group. Love this show love 💕
They totally should keep her!
I like how Loni calls Adrian Munch lol
Yeah it's cute
If you find someone and believe that they are your partner for life...you should demonstrate that trust by marrying them. As a Christian man, I wouldn't like to cohabit with someone in a relationship for years...without sealing it with a marital covenant
Let’s not start the 5th cohost comments pls. If it’s not broke don’t fix it … this show is perfect just the way it is. Garcelle, Loni, Jeannie and Adrienne… we don’t need another one. Shall I continue to remind y’all how hard y’all vouched for Amanda ?
Completely agree. I remember when Amanda was a guest host and the comments were saying she should join permanently. But when she did, she got so much hate😅
Agreed! These days people are CONSTANTLY trying to change/re-cast shows. Jordin did great, show her some love and leave it at that 🙄
Hold up let people just say how they feel. If they love Jordin and want her on the show then why not. I mean the same happened for Garcelle right and the show listened. This is exactly the same with Ana Navarro on The View. I agree maybe the show shouldn't jump head first but let them consider it at least. Jordin does jel well with the show.
@@damiagunbiade yes but Tami would be a great addition to and so on. I love their co-hosts and think they should remain 4 regardless.
Lmaaoo 😁😁😁😁
People are changing the definition of marriage. We have evolved from civil marriage contracts to romantic marriages and everything in between. It's great to see folks marrying for not only love but a true partnership. I have friends who write their own marriage contracts so it's all on the table.
Exactly. This is the definition of feminism. Having choices.
Thank you for bringing up marriage is good and beneficial for those who want kids
A marriage can work even if you don't have kids
@@natashathompson8800 I think her point that if you want to have children, it's beneficial for children that the parents are married.
@@arnitaxavier9446 thank you!!! I’m not sure why it was misinterpreted lol
I chose him because he chose me. After years of being picked last by everyone in my life, he was the 1st one to choose me 1st.
I just love seeing Jordin, she definitely is the example of , wholesome.... you know, like she's not the average young female celebrity, she hasn't been ran through by this rapper or that baller, she's just a nice young lady , and in Hollywood that can't be easy !
@Day poor choices? Why do they have to be poor? She was just living her life. And if she hadn’t made those decisions, she wouldn’t be who she is today.
She was only with three guys before her husband. Jason Derulo was the one who she lost her virginity to. I knew she regrets giving it to him.
@Day no valid argument. Not surprised.
@Day How was Jason Derulo an industry hookup? They were a couple for years and she lost her virginity to him in her 20s. Her music and image has always been wholesome. She’s drama free and married. All in all, she definitely doesn’t seem like an industry standard girl.
You do have any insider knowledge of the very people you are putting down to compliment Jordin. Ran through, is a terrible way to describe women or anyone. Compliments focus on one person and what makes them wonderful, they are not a comparison to whatever others may have gone through/are.
I don’t think I can get married. As a disabled man, I don’t have marriage equality. This is a huge barrier for my community: get married or keep our needed medical insurance to stay alive. It is so unfair but it is the reality. Yes, some people get married but most are already over qualified and already have lost those “benefits.” Most disabled people are in forced poverty. We still do not have true marriage equality in America! I hate this society requirement on marriage when it still isn’t inclusive.
I am too, it’s so unfair but I’m praying and hoping for change.
@@britbritnicole a lot needs to change. More than people realize
I feel you brother. My family is in that situation. But when theres love and God in your relationship... Everything is possible
I don't understand what your point really is in simple words.
@@Uthiop hes saying he might not be able to get married because based on current marriage laws for disabled individuals, if they get married they lose their government assistance. Their partner has to become their sole caregiver financially.
Loni calling Adrienne ‘Munchkin’ will never grow old 🥰🥰🥰🥰
I want Adrienne’s sweater tho…
I also hate that Adrienne said “it’s very Bridgeton” as if Dowry’s aren’t a global culture that has existed for thousands years but yeah let’s associate it with this dumb netflix show 🤦🏾♀️
Yeah, same lol. Typically reflective of viewing everything through the western lens - anything outside of the US and Europe (mainly Britain) doesn’t exist 🤷♀️ Also, wouldn’t be surprised if some people only just learned about dowry from Bridgerton lol.
@@JJ-mx3pd literally how embarrassing, it’s even worse when it’s poc people like imagine if I said “it’s very Taco Bell” while talking about Mexican street food as if Taco Bell invented the concept 🤦🏾♀️ (yes I know Adrienne isn’t Mexican) it’s an example
I know many people have already commented this but Jordan Sparks would be a great addition. I love this show and hearing different perspectives makes me more open minded.
I'll celebrate 20 years this June. I love being married definitely couldn't do the 2022 dating scene lol
Adrienne😪👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
And what Jordin said was beautiful "he saw me"😭😭😭😭✊🏿
From my personal experience, I didn't take the time I needed to really get to know my now ex-husband, I ignored all the red flags. Now I am going at my own pace, and I find that we should really think about what We really want and it not be based on what we can get out of a person.
Great job on the show Jordan…Love it!!!
Marriage is not just a commitment but a legal responsibility. Long-lasting and committed relationships can work just as well for many ,many years it is up to the goals of the relationship between the people that are in it.
Jordan is so dope. She seems like a genuinely sweet person.
I havnt seen Jordin on TV in awhile & I definitely think this could be something big for her. I would love to see her as a permanent co host on a show like this if not this one
Agreed 💯💯👏🏽👏🏽
Dowry is still common in my culture. Sometimes I wish, the real had different ethnicity guests with different culture so we can see and have a little understanding.
If you don’t mind me asking, what’s your culture? I find learning about different cultures fascinating.
@@aleemaanderson6918 Hi! I am the same way about learning and embracing other cultures around me. I’m Hmong.
Same and I’m Somali, majority of the world still had dowries
Nigerian here, we still pay dowry.
Love how Loni always calls Adrienne 'Munchkin' now. Too adorable.
That was cute I love Adrienne too !
if you didn't know the back history of Adrienne's husband you would think he is 'holy'. He cheated on his wife and has 2 kids fathered outside his marriage and he is still considered to be a catch by her. makes you think what kind of values she appreciates
Dowries still exist in some cultures.
I love how she calls Adrienne munchkin. That’s their own special bond they have❤️
I believe in marriage.I personally won't be in a long term relationship without that confirmation.But to each his/her own!
Exactly it’s important especially for women.
Thank you for sharing ladies. These are some of my reasons why I want to get married 😃😃🥰 I’m praying that I find the one God created just for me.
My husband and I just celebrated 10 years of marriage January 15th we have 3 children all girls I wouldn't change it for the world. Im 34 and he is 37. When you know what you want life it doesn't take long to know if marriage with someone is for you.
Jordin's comment is reckless as a married woman. She is advocating "shackin' up". Women who live with men aren't entitled to anything that isn't willed to them. She won't earn SSI credit from a live-in lover.
Adrienne needs to be silent on the issue of marriage.
I enjoyed these ladies talking about this topic!!!🤗❤
Wow! This was deep!! Loni thank you for asking ❤️
Never get married just because you got pregnant, if you need health insurance from a spouse maybe. However divorce can be expensive, plus you brought the poor baby into something that wasn’t ready.
I'm just glad that Jordin choose herself over Jason Derulo. She really knew her worth when she decided to leave🥺❤️. Love her.
I enjoyed this topic and chat.
I disagree with the not getting married just because the relationship is going “good”, but only for religious reasons. I won’t preach because I’m pretty sure we all know what the Bible says, but I do want to get married .. I feel like I have to really get to know the guy before we start dating. Friends before a relationship
Loved this talk! This is a needed talk that is a must for men & women.
Actually marriage started from the Bible. From God. That’s what marriage is. Now a days people has changed the true meaning of marriage.
Well considering that the first recorded marriage ceremony happened in Mesopotamia in 2350 B.C, I not sure about marriage originating from the bible. Plus during that era divorces, dowry existed aswell.
@@arnitaxavier9446 I think what the other person is trying to say is that God instituted marriage between a husband and his wife. Also, you didn't really contrast the other person's point given that the Bible doesn't only began at the birth of Jesus but starts off explains the very beginning of time as we know it.
@@tatianadaniel3569 Well that's the Christian belief. The people of Mesopotamia weren't Christian and didn't follow the Abrhamic religions. They existed before any of the monotheistic religions came about. So the Notion that God instituted the marriage between a husband and a wife is ridiculous. Also non of my ancestors were ever Christian and yet the tradition of marriage have existed for thousands of years.
@@arnitaxavier9446 I think I answered you under another person's comment. The ancient Mesopotamians believed in all kinds of gods. Jesus was not Iraqi (modern day Mesopotamian native). Jesus is Jewish. When reading the Bible, you have to know that it is a collection of books written, sometimes centuries in between one another. With that being said, Christianity ( the purpose of Jesus) actually began before the world began. This can get confusing , but if you're willing to listen, I wouldn't mind explaining it to you in a more simplified way.
I love being married! I’m 28 we are just about to celebrate 2 years! He is the love of my life, my best-friend, the first man to make me feel perfect the way I am and that no other woman comes before me! And our chemistry 🔥 he is it for me for life and God is in the center we waited until marriage 💍
To clarify: We were Celibate while dating.
Marriage isn't for everyone so yes I completely agree with Jordan. "He was the first person to see ME" ugh yes I want that in my life 😩.
Do you mind explaining what you mean when you say "marriage isn't for everyone"?
@@tatianadaniel3569 there's people out there that say they don't want to get married cause it's not for them and that's ok. And if you want to be someone that doesn't want to get married and just be together. Than what's the whole point of being with someone if they don't want the same things as you do. That's what I meant when I said that marriage isn't for anyone.
@@susana01992 So, if the same principals needed in order to sustain a healthy marriage are needed in any other romantic rrelationship, what exactly is it about marriage that you think makes people hesitant?
Good discussion on the topic. I would have loved to see the perspective of a married woman who comes from a background that has arranged marriage and dowery requirements.
Our generation forgets that marriage is a God ordained institution.
I got married because I was newly saved, and because of my previous life, to have guilt-free sex. Church Mothers said, "you a pretty young woman, you need a husband, and sex outside of marriage is wrong. What!!! So wanting to do the right thing church wise, I married. I loved him but I wasn't "in love" with him. Didnt realize right away, 17 yrs later and two kids (which I adore) I filed for divorce. I loved my in laws, they are good people and I still have connection with them. But before salvation, I never desired to be married or have kids, due to upbringing. But the best thing that came out of that union, was my babies and the Legacy of them and my grandchildren. Church folk have good intentions, but should allow people to figure out what God wants for their lives instead of the legalism and doctrines. That is the Holy Spirit's job to lead and guide the believer. Good intentions are not always the best and the motives are not always pure. Live and Let Live!!!
I can't help thinking that if Tam was asked this question, she'd be balling right now. Hahaha love that girl🤣. Great answers from the ladies. Is @jordinsparks guest co-hosting?
Adrienne and Jordin have beautiful 😍 marriages 😍😍😍😍😍😍❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️☺️
Awww!!!,😪....I'm hoping to someday meet my forever gentlemen soon....this made me want to cry....I've never been married so this gives hope at 49🙏🏽💕 I want the butterflies in the stomach type feeling with great chemistry...
If you don’t mind me asking, have you ever been in a long term relationship? If yes, what happened and why didn’t you marry him? I hope this doesn’t sound rude, I’m just curious and trying to learn from others where I can 🙏🏿
@@MsSugarlips21 yes I have in fact we have three children together,its a long story and I'd rather not get into it....I've definitely had some childhood trauma that I've had to heal from....
@@sandrapollard2541 I pray you heal fully and you’re heart desires, according to Gods will, are granted 💕 thank you for sharing!
@@MsSugarlips21 thank you so much,that definitely means alot🙏🏽🙏🏽
@@sandrapollard2541 you’re welcome ☺️
I agree with Jordan, its weird when I see people asking people when they getting married, especially celebrities. When its good chance they don't believe in marriage. It's not for everybody, I know people on both spectrums and both are happy. Long as both parties agree on what they want 🤷🏽♀
Loni what’s the name of that book. I’m interested.
I’m not trying to be shady but I believe Adrienne married him because she thought she was better than the ex wife. She even said in a segment she is competitive with men’s ex’s
It wont last . Adrienne and genie.relationship. might be a few years but it won't be growing OLD together . but Jordin sparks I luv her and I see good things for jordin
Marriage and being committed to one another are two totally different things. Your happiness has nothing to do with what God wants from us.
After that breakup joryn and Jason derulo glad joryn went to therapy and worked on herself b4 marriage that way she escape bringing a broken person to the marriage for another person to fix and make whole which is impossible
The one thing I’m not looking forward to with getting married later in life is that my parents will have less time with my kids. And vice versa.
I disagree with Jordin a poll showed men in non contractual marriages felt less obligated to their partner than those who have been married with vows and a signed agreement
More Jordin Sparks please?!! Shes so sweet!
In South Africa the dowry is actually tradition in the black culture, we choose our own partners though, it's not arranged, maybe way back in ancient times.
Jordan Sparks speaking voice is beautiful!
Y'all see a guest in one video you like what they have to say now you're begging for them to be a permanent host ...like slow tf down! Lol no one needs to be added, let these guests have their moments and it be just that.
Love Adrienne’s response! ❤️
They talk about dowry like it was in the 1950s, my parents are still waiting on mine....lol.
In Botswana, 'dowry' is still a traditional practice that the majority of the population follows. It is also known as 'bogadi' or 'lobola'. It can come in the form of cows or money and is viewed as a way to show ceremonial commitment to the bride-to-be before the community and bring honor to her family. In another scenario, some males pay dowry for their children (male or female) if they are conceived out of wedlock and they, unfortunately, separate from (break up with) the mother of the child. This enables the child to be given the biological father's surname even if the mother decides to marry a different man.
Jordin Sparks looks so good in that shade of green JS🥰🥰
I think in a time where now women are bossing up & don’t need a man to be secure like back in the day … but WANT a man that can m love on her and she can love on him and he’s her equal in todays time shows the progression we’ve made ! Listen marriage is a institution… it’s a business contract… from buying a house… to possibly investing into businesses together ( Kandi & Todd ) and even doing things that feed the soul like having a family together ! Marriage is what u make of it and not one marriage in this country or world is the same ! You create your own rules and try to abide by them and stay true to the vows u said & the oath you made under God and communicate and be prepared for the days to come no matter if it’s good or bad ! As long as you stay true to that person and your word then you got it !
In Nigeria in a way marriage is a must in our society, but we do have people who are happy without the whole marriage thing.
Parent still receive bride price and still give out list of things needed before the traditional marriage can happen....at least where I'm from.
Jordin married because she wanted too. Adrienne got married for validation but I’m glad she’s happy and found a good partner because she definitely went through some heartbreaks.
Married my bestie on 1/1/22 ❤
Do you know anybody ? I'm 36 and religious . Men only want 1 thing
@@freedom4063 Religious men want sex too! Find someone that wants your heart and your body ❤