where i've been
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 1 ต.ค. 2024
- where i've been - this is me pressing the unpause button. i had to take time away. thank you for giving me time to grieve.
i'm not giving up.
facebook support group: bit.ly/37KEMxL
Justice for Daelyn: www.change.org...
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MY AMAZON SHOP:
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INSTAGRAM: / spisha
TWITTER: / spishaa
FACEBOOK: / ayeshaspisha
TikTok: vm.tiktok.com/...
Sorry if we have made you feel pressured to return to TH-cam so soon after everything that occurred, Ayehsa. Take all of the time you need away from the platform
Im new here... can you explain why she went away? She only has few videos on her channel
@@IshratJahan-dh3ev She had tons of videos promoting DevaCurl products which she used religiously for years (among oils and other pampering) to maintain her beautiful hair - and the products treated her very well. Last year she noticed her curl pattern changing and hair falling out. She realized she wasn't alone - others with the same experiences proved DevaCurl changed their products. Her once unattainably gorgeous hair was ruined. She did the right thing and removed every single video promoting DevaCurl products so no one else would have to deal with the consequences. She also recognized that 2020 hasn't exactly been the right time to be posting videos on hair (with everything else in the world). My heart breaks for her. She's continuing to be such a thoughtful person throughout all of this.
I lost both of my parents in a freak car accident two weeks ago. RIP to all the people who have died too young 🖤
I'm so, so sorry for your loss :(
I am so so so sorry for your loss.
My prayers are with you
I'm sorry for your loss :(
I lost my mom 3 months ago and I’m praying for your mental health. I understand how hard it is especially when you can’t leave the house and go places to distract you
We love you, and support you no matter what. Im so sorry for everything you've gone through. I wish you the best.
Yes me too
I don’t have Facebook so I didn’t join any groups but I am a victim 🙋🏻♀️ who has been on a hair journey since January. You are absolutely right! Hair shouldn’t be part of all the things that has happened in 2020
Let's be honest here, we aren't going anywhere 🤣 we love you too much. So you take alllllllll the time you need!
My deepest condolences for your loss! 💔💔💔
Sorry for your friend. inna lillahi wa inallah-e-raji'oon
You're not bad luck, you show light.
Kaiss Siala there’s a lot of different spellings, it’s not necessary to correct me if you understood me anyways.
@Kaiss Siala letters are just a way to store the speech so that people can read and understand what is said anytime they want.
I’ve been so worried about you. As an alopecia sufferer I know how hard coming to terms with hair problems can be. A few weeks ago I had a terrible feeling you were in crisis, I couldn’t get it out of my mind, and in the end spoke toStephanie and asked her to reach out to you, I didn’t want this so I could pry, I just couldn’t stop worrying. (she kindly said she would, and I’m glad you are ready to start talking again)
Omg...ayesha i feel so bad for you. Lets pray that the world gets better
Survivors guilt is a real thing, it’s not stupid, and it’s valid, please don’t minimize how you feel. Blessings on your journey back to health and peace.
It's never stupid to grieve for someone you love. We all handle things in our own way. ❤
Ayesha I’m so sorry for your loss. 2020 has been relentless and I’m glad to see you fighting for what matters to you despite your personal struggles. Stay safe out there 💕 you are powerful
Hey ayesha, don’t stress on hair updates. It’s completely okay to take a break, we are here for you. I’m sorry for your loss and I’m sorry if we pressured you to come back so quickly. We love you ❤️
i knew in my heart i was making the right decision by staying up this late
You do NOT need to justify your feelings to anyone. I'm just glad to see you're doing as well as any of us can right now. There's nothing wrong with taking time for yourself. Sending you good vibes and hugs...
I was getting worried.. but I’m so so sorry.😔 Everything that has happened to you is totally heart breaking. I’m praying for you Ayesha
Ayesha I hope your life gets better and great things come to you!
I realized recently that a lot of people around me haven’t had any experience with death whatsoever while I’ve had way too much, and it’s very sobering to think about how much heavier life feels for people like us. Don’t feel guilty for the cards you’ve been dealt, you are so strong and you truly owe us nothing but thank you for sharing your journey and experience with us. Praying for you and all of your loved ones and I’m so sorry for all the loss you’ve had to endure.
Its always strange to me to know people that have never experienced a loss
I’m sorry for everything you’ve gone through and are going through. I just hope you and everyone else can get through the worst of times to get to something better.
Your experience with losing loved ones just brought tears to my eyes because i relate so well (unfortunately) - the past 10 years i have lost almost my entire immediate family to illness, starting with my younger brother when he was only 13. Every year since he passed, someone i knew either got sick or passed away and like you, i feel like pieces of me have died along with them.. the most recent was my mom last April. Its such a hard feeling to explain when you have become almost numb to knowing that type of loss. Im sorry you are in a similar boat, and i know you have thousands of followers, but if you ever need to talk it out with someone who has also been through their fair share, please reach out. Need to stick together to keep mental health as strong as possible ❤️
Pese don't feel preasured to post...just take AAALLL the time you need. We (your supporters) are here with you. We will support you NO MATTER WHAT. But right now, just take the time you need before coming back❤
So glad ur back! For the longest time I kept checking your channel to see if you were back, great surprise today!
2020, she’s been a hard year but don’t let it knock you down guys ☺️💕
Don’t worry Ayesha I’m never leaving, lol! You have such an allure and a nice speaking voice.
Can’t wait for your future uploads. Journey to recovery together ✊🏽
sending you love, thank you for sharing your story 🙏🙏🙏
Hey dear . I totally feel you. I have lost two friends in a car accident last year and they were younger than me and full of life and not a day that passes by without me questioning death and how some die young . It will be 1 year in September since they passed away and I am just dreading that day. Stay safe, pray for your friend and mine and may we all heal ❤️❤️
I'm so very sorry for your loss.
Shaza Hamed
I pray the love of Allah enfolds you during your difficult times and He helps you heal with the passage of time. 💗💗
Thank you all for your lovely thoughts❤️❤️ you are all amazing human beings
Shaza Hamed I’m so sorry. My little “brother” (we weren’t related but are families are very close) passed away after a long battle with illness almost three years ago, and I still can’t go one day without thinking how unfair it is. Wishing you all the best! Healing will come ❤️
May Allah help you in this difficult time inshallah:) What you are going through is hard, inshallah that everything will be better soon:) Take your time and come back to TH-cam/social media whenever you truly feel ready:)
Hey, I'm sorry that happened with your friend. My best friend was murdered when I was 19, she had been a missing person for nearly a year. It sucks. It sucks in a million small ways. It's been nearly ten years and I still think of things that I want to share with her.
The sadness and pain probably won't go away for a long time. I hope that the pain in your life can transform into something other than just pain. That at the very least the pain lets you love life more deeply as it has for me.
Julie Thompson I'm so sorry for your loss ❤️
@@egypt4214 Thank you for your concern.
She disappeared 😕
I lost my mom in April from congested heart failure and my husband lost his 27 year old brother in a car accident the following month. This year has been cursed. You are very strong and staying strong will get us all through our toughest times because that’s how we continue on in this life. 🙏🏽❤️
Prayers ❤️❤️💕💕
My sincerest condolences, this made me tear up... Would you be able to read this comforting article when you have the time? It is based on the Bible. I hope it brings you peace and, hope for the future: www.jw.org/en/library/books/dead-live-again-tract/dead-live-again/
My best friend was also in a freak accident a couple weeks ago. She barely made it and i can only imagine the pain you are experiencing. Survivors guilt is a very real and excruciating. I will be praying for you as you and his loved ones heal. 💕
I’m so sorry, mama. I lost my mom a few months ago. One day at a time. A big hug from me to you ❤️
Omg I never used deva curl EVER and I always thought about using it, now that I known about what deva curl does I’m definitely not using it now😳
Don’t remind her please
Let’s not talk about them right now please
Dahlia Demyan nobody knows :/ it was definitely devacurl though
I recently saw a lovely TH-camr recommend DevaCurl microfiber hair drying gloves and tbh I wanted them but remembering the damage the company has caused to so many women I will instead seek out a similar product from a different brand.
It's crazy! Women were using that product religiously for months or years with nothing but good feedback, and suddenly their hair gets shithoused! What the f*CK did they do to it?!
deva curl did the exact same thing to my hair hand fulls of hair would leave my head daily I went to multiple doctor visits for it, thankfully my hair is shedding way less now after stopping using all their products
Yeah it's insane. I've stopped using their products months ago after having used them for not to long luckily. I have type 2 waves and hardly had any shedding and when using the devacurl products I did notice a lot a lot of shedding. Now I've been off of their products I have hardly any shedding anymore and healthy strong hair again 😊
In conclusion, we Stan harder than ever before
I was really worried for you. Im extremely sorry for your loss. I hope you can find peace and life get better i love you ❤❤ rest in power to your friend
Wow Was I wrong to be worried so much about her, it was killing me to know if she was OK or not. I'm so sorry for your loss and pain, but so glad you let us know you are working thro them and are OK. Thank sweets for giving us a brief note for our own hearts. Miss you, but always here. Stay strong love !!!!!!
So sorry about your friend. Best of luck on the journey!
ayesha i love that you’re a caring, honest, and principled person who uses her platform to spread awareness for import issues. my first introduction to you was when you called out priyanka chopra at beauty con and endorsed peace between pakistan and india. i’m really happy to see that you’re still using your platform for good! i’m sorry to hear that you lost someone close to you, i hope your pain eases soon. you deserve peace!
Ayesha, I just want to reach my arms out to you and give you the biggest hug. I teared up HEAVY watching this. It’s amazing to see how much strength and courage you have to talk about everything that’s happened in your life. I’m praying for you and your loved ones. I’m still a huge fan of you ✨🌼🌻 love you!!
You are such a beautiful soul. This whole thing just made me cry thinking back on the last few months I've had. On Easter my grandmother unexpectedly passed away and hardly 12 hours later I got a second call that my uncle had passed as well. That was only the start of my issues. They have only gotten worse. But I'm SO incredibly sorry about your friend. you deserve all the time in the world to grieve something like that especially at a time like this.
Immediately dropped out of what I was watching when I saw this while scrolling on my timeline. I had been looking out for an update on your situation from the previous video. I'm so sorry for your loss, bear in mind everyone handles things differently, I don't think you're thoughts or how you felt were silly at all. I'm glad you took the time away that you needed to sort your mindset and keep move forward! Take your time and stay strong! We'll be here 🙂
I'm suffering from an autoimmune disorder...it's been 2 years since I've been diagnosed; since then my hair has been reduced to nothing.. I can no longer let my hair open.. it had grown last year but again I've shed much more than before... honestly I'm in a place where I dnt care no more..
Im so sorry to hear about all that you've been through. Im amazed by your strenght to film on such difficult times and also continuing to fight for everything you believe in. Ever since I found your channel you've been a source for inspiration. I deeply wish things get better for you and that you can continue to spread your beautiful light. Stay safe.
ayesha, will always be here for you, even through times like these. believe me, everything gets better in the end. we love you x
Stay strong and safe
I’m sorry about your loses
I was new to devacurl products and because of you I stopped. I never thought my headaches could be because of their product. I threw everything away. Thanks to you I know it’s a bad product. I just got the headaches, no real damage. I know your hair will heal and grow back strong. You care about your hair and you’ll give it extra love and care. It’ll forgive you and grow back stronger then ever.
you are such a beautiful soul. May Allah swt give all the blessings and happiness that you need
I was literally thinking about you today! I was a bit worried.
Everyone goes through some stuff this shows that even those we look up to and think that their life is perfect. It’s not. So sad to hear about what’s been going on in your life may God be with you. Prayers 🙏🏽 to you. Hope you’re back 💕
And my prayers
My deepest condolences, life isn’t fair, but we have to continue. Hopefully you can do something special with your time here that will leave a legacy for the wonderful friends who left this world too soon. Can’t wait to follow you on this journey 💜 sending you lots of love and prayers 🙏🏻
Props to you for shaving your head i could never do that
She shaved her head?!
You're going through a lot and I can't wait to see what more comes from your channel as you grow through these things.
(Sidenote- where did you get your sweater ? It's amazing and I love it 😍)
I missed you so much!
The strength and resilience you have is inspiring and courageous! The heartbreak and pain you haved felt is not something someone should feel and the los you haved faced makes my heart break for you! I hope that life will get better for you that their will be light and peace! But know that everything you faced the good,the bad , the ugly will bring you strength and courage and will also set your soul on fire . because we only truely live when experience everything!
Girl, I'm so sorry. Condolences aren't enough. Take what time you need and do not feel obligated to us or to anyone else who aren't your nearest and dearest. If posting videos helps you process and focus on something, then we're here for it. But if it ever starts feeling like a chore for you, I think I can speak for the majority of us here when I say we'd rather you take care of your health and happiness before worrying about us. I've thought about you a lot during all this and I'm it was never "where are the videos," it was always, "I hope she's doing okay." May you have peace and blessings from now on.
Anytime you feel like you need to just get things off your chest....we are all here to listen and not judge.
Trigger warning: My post may bring up upsetting memories or thoughts so please be aware and cautious. I lost someone in my family almost 3 years ago. It still feels like time is distorted and that it just happened a year ago.. sometimes like it happened a month ago. He was someone I thought I’d have forever. The person I thought would be an uncle to my little demons if I ever had them and someone who would always be my family. We always had schedule conflicts and issues meeting up but when we did we’d chat for hours and days just to catch up. He was a wonderful amazing loving beautiful man. He was a year younger than me. He passed due to suicide. He was my 1st death that felt personal and I think only recently have I been able to start picking up the pieces of myself to function normally. I had to be in the house it happened it. I had to see the coffin he was laid in. I had to hear the horror story of the night it happened. It was traumatizing. Do whatever you feel you need to do. Grieve however you feel is best. I only hope you’ve figured out how to function normally better than I have. I feel bad all over again that I’m still struggling so hard. I can’t even fault is sister, she reminds us everyday how much she misses him. I’m sorry if reading this post brought up bad memories or hard memories to think about if you have a story similar. If anyone if feeling any thoughts close to this. Even if it’s one offs or what if’s they count. It’s hard to talk to anyone about this but the people on hotlines are trained to help you. +18002738255 if you’ve had any thoughts that make you think you don’t deserve to be here, don’t belong or just want it all to end please talk to the Suicide Prevention Hotline or talk to a licensed professional.
I’m so sorry about your loss, praying you heal beautifully and this experience will make you so much stronger. Take your own steps, grieve as much as you want and don’t worry about anyone else; the main thing is your mental health and sending you hugs! ❤️❤️
Ayesha ... You’re so beautiful 😍... I was wondering what happened to you ... 🙏🏼💕❤️ ... looking forward to your next video!
I am so sorry for everyone that was a victim to this horrible company. I’m just glad I never used this and my parents never bought it for me because of how expensive it was.
I suggest looking at photos of small frogs with hats. It doesn't change anything going on in the world, but it's helped give me a bit of a smile when things seems rough. :) Hope everyone takes care and stays safe
May God rest your friend's soul in peace and may He give all of you the strength to get through this tough time!
Looking around us and all those who we have lost this year, our hair issues seem very small. Like you, I am very much aware of how blessed I am. BUT though our hair issues seem small, they could be a big part of someone's live changing their whole outlook, so thank you for finding the courage to be there for all your followers. They are here for you and support you. They do understand your need to take time to grieve and heal. Unfortunately many have had to do more than their fair share of grieving this year. May God keep us protected and show us a better and just world.
Hi Ayesha! I am looking forward to catching up one-on-one again Friday but I am glad I caught this video because it answers some questions I've had too. As I've told you from the very beginning, I have never expected anything from you with the whole DevaCurl thing and I am forever grateful for what you have contributed to spreading our message. I completely understand and relate to the weight you feel from receiving all those messages and images. I can't say it gets much easier as time goes on especially when I see the images of small children who've lost their hair from the products. Just remember that whether you are putting energy into the DevaCurl recall mission, your family, your friends, and all the other important movements happening in our world right now, you are valued and appreciated for all that you do and we want you to take the time you need so that you can continue to do the good work you've done in making this world a better place. I am here for you, always, and I hope in times of perceived weakness you remember how much strength you have exhibited and that you're a warrior. Let's keep fighting the good fight but never before taking care of ourselves.
I really admire your strength! Not a lot of people can come out of where you've been! You have my support and I can't wait to start on this journey with you- having only discovered I have curly at 31 years of age and a few weeks ago... God bless!
I can deply understand what's going around you as I m Indian 🇮🇳 I highly recommend you to use ayurvedic products from India It really works on your hair...... Lots of love from India 💓
I know this is late, but I am a new viewer new to restoring my curly hair. When you brought up your grieving, I was moved to tears. I also have known too many young family members/friends who have passed away, and another close one recently passing away in a freak accident. I have the same exact recurring thought that I’m the “bad luck” and it’s comforting to hear that I’m not alone or crazy. You are so strong Ayesha, and I wish you a prosperous healing journey.
aww Ayesha, I pray everything gets better for you soon!! T___T
I feel the same way with major loss like that. I lost both my grandparents who pretty much raised me within a year of each other and my best friend from elementary just died at 29, 2 weeks before her birthday and I still don't know why😭 but a part of me has been dying with everyone too.. to a point Idk what I'll have left. I feel for you girl. I'm right there with you❤
I need your advise and wisdom girl my hair needs help ! Am losing a lot of hair it's thinner and lighter and am starting to have less hair on my left side of my head! I haven't done nothing to my hair like dying it or cut it .. because am LOSING it!!! I shower and there is junks of hair falling hair and I begin to cry 😢 looks scary! Praying 🙏 that you recover mentally spiritually and physically 😇😌 wishing best vibes and hope I seen more videos of you and beautiful hair doll take good care love ya 🌸🌺💐
We all will be right next to you on this journey.❤️ Also, i recently lost someone as well and i know u don’t want to probably think of it but i found something that helped me and i hope it will help you. So pain, pain is that constant reminder that Someone u loved isn’t here anymore. And ik it’s hard but you have to continue. Think of a box with a ball inside and with “pain” buttons all over. In the beginning the box is going to shake so much that the ball is constantly going to hit the pain buttons but as time goes on, the box is going to shake less and less and the amount of pain ur going to get is going to decrease. Just remember it’s going to get better. ❤️❤️❤️
You do NOT need to apologize or feel guilty for your emotions. It has been a relentless and tragic year for all of us, and losing someone so close to you at this time is simply heartbreaking. I also lost a close friend from childhood in April. He would have turned 21 a few weeks ago. Losing someone that young adds another layer to the grief. Your first obligation is to yourself, so take all the time you need to heal those wounds. Your mental health is more important than your audience. We'll still be here whenever you're ready
I’m subscribed but I never got a notification or anything! I’m like 2 days late and I’ve been waiting 😭😭😭 Fuck TH-cam man
this is crazy I thought about you just this morning when I was in the shower, I used to have poker straight hair down to my butt in grade school and in grade 8 I buzzed it all off. I'm like that, to me its just hair it will grow back and when it did grow back it came back curly and wavy, I have the weirdest hair some parts can go into ringlets and others are just beachy waves. because I wanted to learn more about my hair, I just never really gave it a second thought, and your first video was the "why I stopped using DevaCurl, being 47 i'm late in the game, and really felt so bad about all these girls going through all of this and of course my first reaction was like just cut it off, but that is just me and I total see how this can devastate anyone who has put in 10 years of hard earned money and time into their hair and having possible follicle damage because of DevaCurl is just appalling. I can't wait for your new videos and see this new journey from the start.. xo
Allah determines when we are to go back to Him before we are even born. We are created to eventually return to Him, and that is love. This life is temporary, it’s our test not home. It has nothing to do with you. Don’t ever blame yourself for the destiny of others. I don’t know you but I can see you’re a good person, and grief makes us all blame ourselves in certain ways. It can tear you apart, but time is made to be a great healer also. Sending love and prayers your way, may Allah heal your heart and one day reunite you with your loved one in Jannah one day. Until then, our beloveds who have returned home live on in our hearts.
I lost by best friend when a speeding driver hit her with his car. It was 2 years ago. We were 17 and had been friends for 13 years. I still miss her. The grief gets easier with time.
You are one of the strongest people out there, and everything you've been through has only made you stronger and more invincible. I pray that you find the happines you truly deserve, and that you feel, going through all those struggles and comeing out victorious were well worth it in the end. Keep on fighting. ❤
Jesus loves you. Pray, always pray for yourself and those around you.
She is literally going through so much, it breaks my heart. I will pray you find peace!
oh dear, please take care of yourself and those around you that you love so much, i'm so sorry for your loss, it has been quite a hard time for everyone around the globe. i just want to say dont demean your own pain because the world is dying. we should all take care of ourselves before we can help others. we are always here for you, so dont rush yourself to come back here. thank you for sharing what you've been going through, its not easy. lots of love
Sending love and sympathy.
I’m so sorry to hear all you’ve been through, no one deserves this much trauma. I hope you’re able to recover in all ways, you are so strong 💗
You've inspired me to take better care of my curls and accept them. I'm Pakistani and went to an all-girls school where the majority had either straight or wavy hair. My grandmother shaved off my head when I was a young girl because she hated how the curls looked, thinking they looked unkempt, matter and "lower class". Watching your channel and your ig, your story, it's helped me in so many ways. Thank you so so much for the words you have said to help and inspire other girls like me
I hear you. I see you. I feel you. All the best for you.
That fucking sucks. I’m sorry.
im so sorry hun. my best friend died suddenly too, 7 years ago now. I understand your pain, have a hug
OMG YAY. I hope your doing better!!!!!
Ayesha, you are an incredible woman. Your beauty is matched by your compassion and intellect, and I’m so proud of you for staying strong throughout so many repeated tragedies. This year sucks. Life can absolutely beat us down sometimes. But you chose to keep going. And THAT is so admirable❤️ Grieving is a process and it comes in waves. Sending you love and healing energy during this time.
I love you! Keep keeping on! You're so strong...being a Pakistani who had to grow up hating her curls...and you'll get through this!
So wait you live in Alaska?
Hi Ayesha. I think one of your videos was taken by a company called "Retail Delights" to sell Korean Hair serum. I took a screenshot. I think it was the video of you showing how you oil your hair and particularly the part where you demonstrate how to use pimento oil (except that this "Retail Delights" company suggests that you are using their Korean hair serum). I thought you ought to know. If this was intentional, please ignore this message.
Did DevaCurl use sodium-hydroxide to mix the 'PH' ? That means their are hard-acids in the products; right? Like 80's perm-salutation. Wet hair (cortex) hold-on to acids; Right? The hair dries with the hard-acids in the cortex; Right? Add the build-up on the outside. Wet and repeat.
We support your journey through all of this don't ever worry about that
May Allah guide us ameen 💖💖💖
Inna Lillahi wa inna ilayhi raji'un.
When will you upload your hair journey vids?
Just found out that you stood up to Priyanka, proud of you! I agree, she was very wrong to say that and very hypocritical. Good for you for standing for truth and peace. I’m sorry if you’ve gotten hate because of that, but a celebrity will have an upper hand because of their influence. Don’t worry, the real ones are still here.
This was such a great, quick, to the point video. I really appreciate you being straight to the point! So sorry to hear about your best friend, I can only imagine how that must feel and all of our thoughts are with you. Thanks for also speaking up about BLM, so many people ignore it and it really makes me happy to support you since I know your values align with mine.
Excited for you to be back❤️
I’ve been waiting for this! 😭💗
We love you and are here for you. I have goosebumps right now. Please know that we are thinking of you too and checking in on you often to see if there is any way to support you. Adore you and wishing you the best ❤️
omfg, not what I was expecting. I'm sorry for your loss. Im happy youre getting back on your feet again. Sending lots of love
WHERE IS THIS SWEATER FROM
So I used Deva too, my hair started breaking off. My entire life I’ve struggled with my long thick curls until I just stopped putting crap in my hair and started feeding it. I’ve healed my hair naturally and it’s grown about 7inches in the last three years :) So much healthier! I’m happy to share with you my no bullshit, not sponsored, natural approach to hair care that re-grew stronger, healthier, longer hair.
What do you use now?
Suzanne. I use Calia and I make oil blends and rinses. Have you tried Calia products yet?
@@jenniferwright1052 I have not but I've heard of them from HolisticHabits here on youtube.. I'm so tempted to try them now
Great thanks for sharing
Hello,
I've never seen one of your videos. Today your face popped up on my TH-cam chronicals and your face expression made me hit play on the video.
I'm glad I did.
I pray for your strength and I pray that the family and friends of your late friend find peace.
Also, idk if you have flash cards or something but you should totally be a public speaker of sorts
I hope you're ok Ayesha! Btw, are you aware that your video and face is being used to sell a Korean Hair oil?