Aside from practicing mindfulness, which is probably the most effective way to help you accept reality as it is -- here's a quick exercise you can do that has also helped me be more calm and accepting of stressful circumstances, so that I can more proactively move past the obstacle. #1: Ask yourself: What is the worst possible thing that could happen in this situation? - Briefly detail the specifics of this potential negative outcome. - If everything that could go wrong, did go wrong, what exactly would that look like? #2: Fully accept this outcome as something that could very well happen. - Remind yourself that even if this bad thing happens, you will be okay. - Imagine yourself taking a deep breath in, and then out, and saying: "Despite all this, everything will be okay. That's just the way life goes sometimes." #3: Focus on the things you can control. - Work on improving upon the worst possible outcome by focusing on things that are within your domain of control. - Specify the things that are within your control, and the things that are not. - ie. If you can't control the traffic, what can you control? Perhaps you can practice mindfulness to calm your conscience and uplift your mood. Perhaps you can listen to an interesting and uplifting podcast or audiobook while you're in your car. Perhaps you can call your Aunt to thank her for the socks she gave you for your birthday. The Result: You'll find that the worst possible outcome almost never comes into being. You usually won't be fired and ruthlessly reamed out in front of everyone in your department for being 10 minutes late. And even if you did, you have already accepted that as something that could happen. You have already recognized that even if that were to happen, you'd be okay. As a result, the reality that actually takes place is almost always a pleasant surprise. An upgrade from the worst scenario. This is uplifting and encouraging, and helps you focus on the good things rather than the bad. By approaching situations like this, you will also feel more in control of your own life, as most of your focus will be directed towards processes within your control, rather than outcomes outside of it. Over time, your mind will gradually shift into being more interested and immersed in doing a good job with what's in front of you, for its own sake. Rather than that good job being a means to micromanage and craft a perfect desired outcome -- and then being disappointed when that perfect outcome almost never comes true. Hope this helps!
Have wanted to say this for a while. Way back in early 2020 I was suffering from extreme anxiety and some suicidal thoughts. I was in a really dark place but when I found this channel I started to work on myself. I started journaling and over time got better. I am now in a much better place an even when I'm down I know how to pick myself up again. Thank you so much Joey ❤
Realizing that there is a difference between responding to situations in life versus reacting to them has been very beneficial for me, and I think that is a Stoic concept. Thanks for the great video Joey!
I noticed the exact concept when it comes to rain. Sounds crazy, but it really works. Everyone gets frustrated or disgusted by a rainy day, trying to run as fast as possible in order not to get hit by the rain drops. However, if you just walk calmly trough the rain and consciously accepting it by not covering yourself with your jacket or umbrella, you will notice it is not that bad. In fact water is life and rain one of the cleanest products produced on this planet. I guarantee you that you will almost embrace it and feel the power of nature by just accepting the fact that you can do nothing about it in that moment and at the end of the day it’s just water hitting your skin. Try it out.
I agree in essence but I dunno about raing being one of the cleanest procust in much of the developed world. ever heard of acid rain? `The amount of pollutants in our atmosphere, I question how pure the rain is in major cities.
So true. I daily cycling to work and it often rains. UK weather. After few month, my approach was like okay, let it be. I started to see the positivies, its raining, but atleast it isnt snowing and similar examples.
“In your actions, don’t procrastinate. In your conversations, don’t confuse. In your thoughts, don’t wander. In your soul, don’t be passive or aggressive. In your life, don’t be all about business'' Marcus Aurelius
@@ilhomsanokulov Feels more like inspiration to me rather than stealing. Like, the name of Ideas' is still here and it's not like Chapter is gonna drag away a significant amount of viewers. The channels' videos aren't nearly the same.
This is something I’ve been putting into practice but I’m nowhere near good at it lol although as someone with a history with agoraphobia and anxiety, I apply this to traffic situations, which is great practice. You’re doing awesome work here man, keep it up.
Yyup, same here. On the intro skit I was like: Traffic? Yeah, pretty though break. Prob on my nerves. Deep breaths, resolve to absolutely crash that workday for best impression. And prob call in to report the unfortunate situation to direct supervisor. Still shit, but seems the responsible thing to do. One cranky dude? Why should it bother me? Can see a ton of people going apeshit. But falling in line and perpetrate the cycle of mystery? What good does that do to anyone? Break the wheel, rise above. Fire back a joke "thanks pal, I'll make sure to pleasure my SO tonight" or dunno. Might jank him out the bad mood but at least establish to myself and the others around that my spirit is unshakable. This kinda leans on the preferring a bit of chaos part.
It took around 9 years to get to the point where I am happy and confident to say in a healthy way that I love the way my life looks... So keep on trying, be persistent, learn and adapt and everything will work out on the end ...
Honestly this is probably going to help me out a lot. I tend to get upset at the slightest inconvenience or mistake I make, and it's been really bad on every single aspect of my life. Thank you honestly. I needed this.
Unsure why, but I found myself crying mind-way through this video. Weren't even sad tears... more so just thinking about our morality as humans and how incredible special it is to experience life, even with all the little annoyances and setbacks. Life is still pretty rad at the end of the day. Great video, btw.
Unsure why, but I found myself crying as I was mid-way through eating my ham and cheese sandwich. The cucumbers are just so incredibly beautiful and special, as is the golden brown glow of the crust of the sourdough.
When you accept and understand mortality, you gain a new perspective as you fully realise it will all be gone someday. Everything. The good things, so you better enjoy them as much as you can. And the bad things, so don't worry too much about them. It's empowering and liberating.
This has been my life philosophy for such a long time. When I'm late for an important appointment people ask me how I'm so calm. I usually say I just chose to be calm, being angry won't benefit me at all right now. But to sum up this life philosophy I'd use the phrase "it is what it is"
This video came exactly when I needed it, I've been feeling dejected with my business, my career and have recently been diagnosed with ADHD and GAD. I've been thinking endlessly about my failures, overthinking the things I should or shouldn't have done. I have all these expectations of where I should be and reality isn't meeting that expectation. It's difficult to accept all the crap that has happened to me but avoidance and living in a fake 'dream' world isn't helping. You're right, I need to accept everything happening so I don't feel so out of my depth and overwhelmed all the time. Thank you kindly. :)
The ADHD will be a blessing. Use it to your advantage. Once I got diagnosed with it and understood it, it made alot of sense and changed my perspectives on many things.
@@kalpeshparekh429 Same. I turned it from a negative to a superpower when I realized that hyperfocus allows me to learn and internalize vast amounts of information much faster than a neurotypical person. True, I had trouble completing simple tasks, but medication has made it possible for me to develop new, healthy habits. My home is clean and in order and I feel much better now.
@@kalpeshparekh429 Thank you so much for the kind words! It means to so much to know that others understand and have come out stronger on the other side! Well wishes to you! :)
Perspective is everything. What I'm really getting out of this is to spend the energy on the important things that we can control. Don't get so hung up on inevitable tragedies whether great or small. Refusing to accept them is refusing to accept reality for what it is, but once we find that acceptance within ourselves, some things just become so much simpler and naturally not worth wasting our energy on. I'm watching over this video again and it really hits different ❤ I see now that this isn't a forced indifference, it's just a change in perspective. It's not about how you feel. It's about what you think. And it's not about not having desires or goals or passions or not wanting efforts to pay off, or never feeling good feelings again. It's about accepting all outcomes-both the positive and the negative.
First off, I really enjoy your videos and always have something to take away, sometimes a lot. This video popped up on my recommended list today, right after I got a call about the cost of upcoming medical testing that I was already extremely nervous about. I immediately got angry, then very depressed. However, I watched this and it really hit me hard. It was exactly what I needed to hear in that moment. I drown in my own negativity about life instead of accepting it and embracing the suck. Thank you for the content you make! It has been truly inspiring to me and I'm sure countless other!
The beautiful advice you gave is what we follow in Islam. Nothing and no one is eternal. I lost my sister recently. Hardest time ever. But I'm learning to accept it. One day at a time. Because it's what was meant to happen. And nothing or no one could've changed it or stopped it from happening. And it's the legacy we leave behind, (like your helpful videos for example that I read helped a person avoid suicidal thoughts...), (what my sister had taught me and that will help me my entire life...) the way we make people feel...that will matter and live on. Acceptance lessens the level of pain, frustration, anger... No matter how hard it is, we should try to learn that events happen for a reason. There's always something positive that comes out from it. Always. No matter how hard or even tragic the event may be. The simplest example of a positive outcome: most of the time, we learn a lesson that will help us deal with other similar situations in the future. In a way or ways that will make those events more bearable. Love your videos. They're very helpful. Keep up the good work.
Ruminating on the past and overthinking in general, is like someone slapping you in the face and then you continuing to slap yourself in the face another 99 times.
This is something I practice often, ESPECIALLY at work. Things go wrong and I'm like "oh well, it happens let's see how much of it I can fix if at all" and then I move on. I have a lot of interactions with my coworkers where I'm there completely unphased by an issued and they're stressed and cursing and letting themselves go for a moment. I prefer to stay in the moment and fix what I can and not worry about it much longer afterwards. I'm happy now I have a word for the mindset I've been putting together and thank you so much for fleshing it out for me. I really appreciate it, its nice to have an idea be validated and fleshed out lol.
I was spending the last few days stuck in the corner of my mind. Going for a new job after a long period of lockdown with many things have changed, radically. This new video just popped up and gave me the idea to steer my view to better fit with the current reality. Have watched many of your videos, but this is the first time I comment: Thank you, Joey! For many ideas you have contributed.
I always find myself dabbling in this headspace then Better Ideas comes along and fleshes out a full video that explains what I'm feeling to me. It's really handy keep up the awesome work man its changed so many lives
Everything works out guys. I was diagnosed with MS in late 2019 and I spent a year and a half pretty much lying in bed 24/7 and sleeping all day. I was eating like shit, sleeping at 6am and fell behind all my schoolwork. Now it's December 2021 and I've been going to the gym for a few months and workout out at home on off days, I drink a shit ton of water and watch what I'm eating, I've lost 12kg and reconnected with friends. I've started playing basketball again and started to catch up with my work in time for final exams. Even though my life was so tiring and downright depressing sometimes I kept my head up and always knew it would get better eventually. Never ever give up on yourself Ily all ❤️
This is excellent advice. I'm clinically diagnosed with OCD and this is one of the first things my psychiatrist ever taught me. This lesson has stuck with me ever since and it has helped me so much.
Trying to put this into practice now with my fears and obsessions. I've always understood that the fear causes suffering, but in an entirely different way now, I am questioning whether the suffering is in the fear itself. Maybe I'm afraid of not being able to handle an outcome more than I am afraid of the possibility or randomness itself, and that is an interesting thought. It makes my fears seem more unfounded-not from a logical perspective where I can wrestle with the validity of the fear, but from the perspective that the thing I am wrestling with may not be so insurmountable if I'd only clam down and let myself think beyond the fear and accept it as a possibility I will survive. I hope you've been doing well still and I'm glad to see the video helped someone else out there. With the right mindset, these really are life changing principles.
My "attitude of acceptance" grew so big that almost nothing bothers me anymore. And it made me stop trying to achieve anything since I started to accept that all I ever wanted is out of reach for good and all within reach is not what I'd desire. It brought me to a point where I couldn't care less whether 8.something billion people around me ever existed. I stopped sharing knowledge, advice, humor and moments with others since I accept my and all the other's complete and utter insignificance in this universe. Yea, acceptance is wonderful. Unless you cross the line of acceptance through insight, then your life turns into a simple wait for its end.
In Buddhism, mindfulness is a _method_ or _tool_ to help you develop "true knowledge". That true knowledge makes you truly unshakeable... the mindfulness is "just" the method that allows you to get there!
If you live thinking of yesterday, you'll be regretful and if you live thinking for tomorrow you'll be anxious. The only way to find peace is to live for the now. I think both Eckhart Tolle and Michael Singer teach Stoic principles. It certainly helps me from spiralling and being present in the moment. Great video 🌻
Earlier this year, I was having severe issues with my partner. I felt like I had no control of the relationship for the longest time, until I realized that the only thing I needed to be in control of was myself. This was when I started thinking about stoicism and the separation between what you can control and what you can't. A few months down the line, my life has changed radically because of the simple shift in mindset. Stoicism is the most powerful tool I know.
Joey, I think a lot of your content mirrors what I’ve learned in Covey’s 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. The refusal to react to things outside our control is a major piece of the groundwork Covey lays for the rest of the book and he describes the dichotomy as working in your circle of influence rather than wasting time in the “circle of concern” which is stuff outside our control - and as you said, once one learns to work in the circle of influence it expands and the circle of concern shrinks (“becoming a surfer” or “inviting chaos”). Like so many people your videos have helped put a different spin on certain wisdom for me and made it more real and practical for me. I’m very thankful for the greater degrees of self control you’ve helped me to grasp in practical ways. I am a Christian and that is a major Christian virtue for sure. God bless and thank you for your tremendous positive contribution to the world.
Your timing with this video is impeccable. I just had a friend die recently and it was so sudden and so unexpected and I was just in total shock and started fearing death. And this video was kind of the pep talk I needed to calm down and come back to earth and remember hey, it's all part of life. Of course it's okay and normal to be sad about it and to grieve, but it is easier to handle knowing this. Also, I'm here for the life is shitty scale. Definitely made me laugh lol
The attitude of acceptance in my life is more like a lesson from God (imo). I’m partaking in a 12 step program and surrendering myself to a God of my understanding. I’m 6 months sober. Life is so much better today than it was 6 months ago, it’s crazy how fast things can change when you take up healthy lifestyle habits. Thank you for the amazing content that helps me, and God Bless you all! 🙌🏻❤️
This came at a really clutch time for me, as someone that’s been experiencing severe anxiety episodes on and off for 6 months since starting my first career job and graduating from university.
Hey man, thank you for this video (and all the rest of the content of course). During my Masters's degree in psychology, I often felt overwhelmed by the number of concepts, theories, confusions and often sad conclusions. It's only recently that I've been able to gain some distance and sort things out in my head (good therapy definitely helped too, which I recommend to everyone). The things you talk about very much fit with "life-changing" concepts for me like the Acceptance and Commitment therapeutic approach and Optimistic Nihilism (refer to the Kurzgesagt video), basically - yeah, life has no meaning and we have no control over many things but it's what allows us to make our own meaning and live according to our chosen values. Keep up the good work! Thanks!
I was so angry for so long, any little thing or sign of disrespect would send me into a violent rage. Gaining control of my day to day emotions was the first step to me becoming a good man. I almost never break my frame these days.
I was at a pretty low point when I stumbled into Stoicism. The pandemic didn't help things, but the concept of 'radical acceptance' as well as some teachings from Marcus Aurelius have definitely helped me frame things differently from how I would have before. Currently waiting to grab the new book on the teachings of Musonius Rufus to help continue build my practice.
I wish you lingered more on how to actually turn bad situations happening to you into something positive. Because I think that is even stronger than acceptance. While acceptance is like “Alright, this happened. It’s okay, i will not let this negatively affect my day/life”. But after acceptance, there’s the next ultimate level which involves getting a sort of weird twisted pleasure from something bad happening to you. And i’m not talking about your family dying, but i’m talking about the much more frequent shitty things that happen to us on a daily base (like getting stuck in traffic while being late). With this mindset, when something like this happens, you’re like “Okay, what if i still manage to pull off a great first day at work. That’s gonna be so much more satisfying considering the disatvantage i’m having now” and the outcome is that your much more motivated and determined than you would have been without that happening to you.
Just broke my collar bone and some ribs. Had a rough breakup earlier on. Felt like my life was caving in this past week and today… The timing of your videos never ceases to amaze me. Thank you, Joey.
@@jtrdrew thank you dude, I’ll go ahead and look some up for collar bone breaks. My arm is super claustrophobic being immobilized in this spot. Thanks!
Things can and will get better man! Try and hang tough, I just went through a breakup too and I’ve just tried to focus on how much time I have to better myself and give back to me, not anyone else. You’re a champ dude hang in there
Thank you for this video, Joey. A couple of days ago I found myself in a situation that was completely out of my control. There was a flight delay and since I'm a flight-attendant and one of the few representatives of airline during the flight, my passengers blamed me for all things that happened like the weather, bad aircrafts that can not fly in such cold weather and so on. I tried to explain that they would not be forgotten and left in the destination-airport, but the passengers didn't want to listen. I understand that it was a difficult situation and I certainly didn't want to be in their shoes, but I certainly was not the reason of it. I came home completely exhausted, angry and empty. Now, thanks to your video I understand that I must not take it personally. Some situations and certainly people just out of our control. All you have to do is make your best efforts in things which depend on you. And everything bad which inevitably happens helps us to develop and rise above it.
i love what Joey's talking about in every video from the bottom of my heart actually because this channel seems to be my savior from the shackles of my mind. he helped me to get to the gym, change my habits and think more positively about the reality. thank you Joey, i hope you're happy
That first scenario happened yesterday, a truck was in front of the traffic. My mom told me to leave, but I quickly said no, and told her to be patient, like she told me. And so after a few minutes, the truck finally moved, and I got to school on time. And I learned patience. Win-win scenario.
I usually push through difficult situations with a mindset focusing on personal growth through persevering adversity, but the idea of acceptance and focusing on the bigger picture is very intriguing and something I’m sure I will integrate into my life, thank you!
Something that helps me with brutal acceptance is the philosophical idea of "compatibalist determanism'. The idea is that you have your own free will to choose in life, but there was always one choice that you were going to make and only one way things were going to happen. Keeping that in mind I accept things didn't 'almost work out' and there are no 'what if I...' type situations. There was never any chance of things happening differently and this is the one and only thing that was ever going to happen. Realizing that then helps you accept the past and focus on making the most of present choices.
This was the biggest and best realization that helped me a lot a few years ago. A lot of what happens beyond our control isn’t the end of the world. Often, it feeds into our fear of the unknown and our reaction in that unknown is important. A flat tire doesn’t mean your day is ruined, it just means you have an extra step in that day. Maybe you needed to slow down your thoughts and the time waiting in the repair shop is what it takes to process through them.
Wow. I didn't realize until watching this video that I've practically made a career out of this concept; I didn't even know there was a name for it. Every time I've outperformed my peers in my field, my bosses have always praised my ability to stay calm and they always ask about my method. When times get tough or stressful I just zoom out more, into next week or next month, making the present stress seem a lot smaller in comparison. Eventually it became a part of my character and it's served me super well in some of the toughest situations inside and outside the workplace. I'm definitely going to read up on stoicism now
Thank you for all your work Joey! You've helped this random internet stranger immensely over the last few years. May this unverifiable act of thankfulness serve to boost the algorithm, if nothing else. Love ❤️
The overview of this video: Always be aware of the worst possible outcomes that life can throw at you in any given situation. You will not be able to control most of these situations, so don't worry about getting upset or stressing about it. Instead, focus on the variables you CAN control in order to decrease the severity of your downfall in your inevitable bad situations :)
Love this. Really makes you feel in control when you just accept the bad things that happen as life experiences, focus on what you can learn from them and then move on.
Great video Joey, sometimes though life's shit can get way too overwhelming like I was watching the news and there was a story about how a child got kidnapped and it just made me think gosh what the parents must be going through... radical acceptance must be extremely hard in such a scenario
This year has been the worst for me I lost my grandfather( on February) he was very close fo me, He was actually like my father, I also lived with him, and I lost my father recently he was on life support for like 3 months and it was really a very traumatic experience in that period of time... Losing both of them was really hard for me as it was so surprising and unexpected that I am still on shock. So I still get sad sometimes and in those hard times I could not focus on my studies. I have too much load now and tests are coming. I was very down today and almost broken, I was confessing to god to give me strength and clarity about myself. And here you are! Thanks for the video Even expressing myself in the comments can really make me feel good about myself
Kandinsky, in his abstract paintings, would mean different things with shapes and colours (it's also written in some of his books). Shapes are intentions, while colours are emotions. They've always inspired me to consider the difference between rational responses and emotional ones. Both can make sense, even better together; just know that the immediate shine of colour is not often what leads the composition, but black shapes.
Thank you, Bro! Your videos help a lot! That is decent advice for each of us. Each of us lives in our minds. Our expectations create a picture of our future. But the world around us creates a reality. In the previous year, I was anxious about the obstacles in my career path and the insufficiency of the opportunities. But now, when my country is at war (I'm from Ukraine) and near my city, russian terroristic forces are shelling the missiles, I’m deeply reviewing my attitude to life, problems, and happiness. In the morning, I’m happy that I am alive and woke up and able to see my family. During the day, I’m happy that I have a meal, and I see the sun (or cloud, or rain). In the evening - that God gave us this blissful day ) We should be more thankful for what we have! And happiness happening ))
Ya know, I see things this way naturally after years of stoic practice. Almost nothing phases me, and if it does it is incredibly brief. Frankly, the only thing that ever seems to bother me at all is just how insanely emotional people are about every...single...inconsequential...thing. But even then I end up seeing it compassionately after some reframing. This takes practice, but it's worth it. I'm happy just to be alive at this point. Even the "bad" times are a bonus, as I get free opportunities to grow. Anywhos, the best philosophical marriage of all time as I see it right now is Stoicism and Buddhism. Don't sleep on it, folks. It's all there.
Great video, thanks. Also I would love to hear you talking more about stoicism. About virtues, amor fati and main principles of stoicism. For example, how to control your perception and redirect your emotions, how to change your perspective on the bad things and learn how to accept them, etc. I think there's a lot more you can tell ppl about stoicism and it's really necessary at this difficult times
Idk man but everytime this guy drops a video, it’s like free therapy! Very grateful for every content you’ve done! It’s hard to not click any of it at all 🥺
It’s been a year and some change but I was introduced to Stoicism through a Pewdiepie video. “Happiness and freedom begin with a clear understanding of one principle: Some things are within our control, and some things are not -Epictetus” -Pewdiepie -Me Powerful stuff
And sometimes the things out of our control have and influence on the things in our control. Or affect on how we react or influence those controllable things.
Extraordinary person reading this, you are not define by your circumstance or your past. It’s not what happened to you that determines your success in life; it is how you deal with those circumstances that determines your success in life! You are strong, you are capable and practice forgiveness and gratitude everyday. This will change the course of your life forever! Love you always and I believe in you wholeheartedly ✨❤️ - Nat
I don’t know what sparked it, but I developed this trait probably throughout high school, and it has been one of my biggest strengths and served me incredibly well in life. 10/10 would recommend.
Going through subscriptions and doing a clean up. I always plan to watch your vids and don't really get round to it. I've found value in quite a few so thought I'd come back and see if I still did. It's funny how the universe works. In September this year, our mortgage interest rates are going up so high that we don't know how we're going to pay it yet. I've been so depressed that I have no idea what to do with myself, everyone stresses me out and nothing seems exciting to me. This video put me in that mood that I'm happiest: the acceptance of all things. I have read Eckhart Tolle's work but will definitely be looking into stoicism. It sounds similar. Thanks Joey. This isn't the first time you've snapped me out of my own shit. Just thanks.
Something that really helped me, in my life, is asking myself: what would X philosopher do in this situation? What would Marcus Aurelius do? How would he react?
Suffering is the difference between your expectations and your current reality. When you realise you are in control of this expectations, you are truly liberated. This doesn’t make you less driven, quite the opposite. The limiting tension, the crippling perfectionism is gone, and you are unstoppable. More importantly, you are truly in the moment as it is, rather that in an imagined expected scenario.
I just saw a clip of blond middle-aged woman yelling and screaming profanity at an airport before this vid. Idk why she did it, but this proves Stoicism is really needed today as it did then
I've been learning to do this without even realizing it. Over the past year, I've had infuriatingly bad luck regarding technology, causing me to miss out on some important things, and set my goals back some months. Sometimes I've wondered if someone was playing a huge cosmic joke on me, until I remember that much worse has happened to other people, and there was probably something I could've done about it. My solution's to challenge myself for a year to not procrastinate on any hard work regarding my goals, and to be as efficient with my time and resources as possible while staying sane. Make it so if there is some cosmic force with a grudge against me, they'll have to hit me with some pretty off-the-chain bad luck to stop me. I'll still have an enemy, but at least I'll know it's not me.
I think I've been living like this for a good while now and it's actually pretty dope. I can see it fairly often when friends get upset over minor issues I didn't even notice. Like the train is late and I am like yeah who gives a shit, then I will be 15min late for lecture, so be it. Radical Acceptness really is the key, things always work out in the end.
When you accept things, you don't feel negative about them anymore. However, you need to feel negative about bad things inorder to improve yourself. So, how can you logically find motivation to do anything when you radically accept your life as it is? Such an idea is not something I expect from a self improvement channel
I just lost my father on October 31 2021 he died in my arms on a hunting trip. He was 56 years old, and I didn't see it coming. I will definitely try to apply this mindset immediately. Thank you
You are a true inspiration, Joey. You've add so much value to my life through your work, and, in fact, you helped inspire me to start creating content on TH-cam! Keep the fantastic content coming, my Stoic brother!
Thank you so much. I’m passing through a breakout in a 8 years relationship and now I see that it isn’t only about what I want so I need to accept that this decision is out of my control now
I’ve come back to watch this a few times. I honestly think it’s the best TH-cam video I’ve ever seen. Love your channel and looking forward to watching more of your videos!
This is one of your best videos to date, we really do have a fundimental view of the way we think the world is , and then we freak out when shitty things keep on happening. Its never been explained to me like that. wow
How nice it is to see people talk about Epictetus and Seneca and bring their ideas forward into this century. We all need them, but in an easier format to digest 😅
this literally changed my life Ialways read up on stoicism but come 2020 I really put it into practice and it has changed everything! "Just that you do the right thing. The rest doesn't matter" that right there is the key to me. As long as I do my part to the best of my ability everything else that's out of my control is just that...out of my control. It's helped me stay humble and just live...I realized that what I can control is my reactions to certain situations.
can't remember where i read this but this could serve - "all anger stems from a betrayal of expectations. Manage your expectations and there will be no anger." you didn't expect a traffic jam, someone to pour a drink on you, your partner to not listen attentively and just brush off your bad day. Yet it happens and in some way it is well within the realms of reason/chances of those things happening to you
I wish I had seen your videos earlier in life. I have had a lot of hard times because of mental blocks placed on myself from just existing. Recently I have started to emerge from a mental funk, and this content I know is going to be helpful.
Yeah, I do this all the time. Nothing phases me. My friends and family are astounded that having broken both legs, broken my back twice, ribs, knee-caps, and even having had my jaw ripped off and going into a 5 day coma, that I treat all that comes equanimously. Don't get upset, get on with it. Each new moment is a potential new opportunity. The mindset of Buddhist practitioners helped me to reach this state of acceptance. Though I do not claim to be a Buddhist. Every faith, or no faith at all can lead you to this path.
Aside from practicing mindfulness, which is probably the most effective way to help you accept reality as it is -- here's a quick exercise you can do that has also helped me be more calm and accepting of stressful circumstances, so that I can more proactively move past the obstacle.
#1: Ask yourself: What is the worst possible thing that could happen in this situation?
- Briefly detail the specifics of this potential negative outcome.
- If everything that could go wrong, did go wrong, what exactly would that look like?
#2: Fully accept this outcome as something that could very well happen.
- Remind yourself that even if this bad thing happens, you will be okay.
- Imagine yourself taking a deep breath in, and then out, and saying: "Despite all this, everything will be okay. That's just the way life goes sometimes."
#3: Focus on the things you can control.
- Work on improving upon the worst possible outcome by focusing on things that are within your domain of control.
- Specify the things that are within your control, and the things that are not.
- ie. If you can't control the traffic, what can you control? Perhaps you can practice mindfulness to calm your conscience and uplift your mood. Perhaps you can listen to an interesting and uplifting podcast or audiobook while you're in your car. Perhaps you can call your Aunt to thank her for the socks she gave you for your birthday.
The Result: You'll find that the worst possible outcome almost never comes into being. You usually won't be fired and ruthlessly reamed out in front of everyone in your department for being 10 minutes late. And even if you did, you have already accepted that as something that could happen. You have already recognized that even if that were to happen, you'd be okay. As a result, the reality that actually takes place is almost always a pleasant surprise. An upgrade from the worst scenario. This is uplifting and encouraging, and helps you focus on the good things rather than the bad. By approaching situations like this, you will also feel more in control of your own life, as most of your focus will be directed towards processes within your control, rather than outcomes outside of it. Over time, your mind will gradually shift into being more interested and immersed in doing a good job with what's in front of you, for its own sake. Rather than that good job being a means to micromanage and craft a perfect desired outcome -- and then being disappointed when that perfect outcome almost never comes true.
Hope this helps!
'X 0000
You need to start getting into some of the eastern philosophy too.
Thank you, it truly did
Woah thanks big bro
This helps 😉
Have wanted to say this for a while. Way back in early 2020 I was suffering from extreme anxiety and some suicidal thoughts. I was in a really dark place but when I found this channel I started to work on myself. I started journaling and over time got better. I am now in a much better place an even when I'm down I know how to pick myself up again. Thank you so much Joey ❤
I'm so glad to hear that! Keep up the amazing work!!
I’m gonna go hit the sac
This happened to me too. Isn't it lovely almost like we can accomplish anything I'm at peace 😌
So happy to hear about your progress. Keep flourishing!
@@getTheSchmack you as well friend!
*”You have power over your mind - not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.” - Marcus Aurelius*
How does anybody know if they have power over their mind?
It's mainly controlling the inner narrative. If you build a positive inner narrative you have more control
Adam Bright, because you always do. Those convinced otherwise are experts at making excuses.
This is bullsh.t. Of course you have power of outside events
@@Cookiekeks You can influence them; that's not power/control over them
Realizing that there is a difference between responding to situations in life versus reacting to them has been very beneficial for me, and I think that is a Stoic concept. Thanks for the great video Joey!
I noticed the exact concept when it comes to rain. Sounds crazy, but it really works. Everyone gets frustrated or disgusted by a rainy day, trying to run as fast as possible in order not to get hit by the rain drops. However, if you just walk calmly trough the rain and consciously accepting it by not covering yourself with your jacket or umbrella, you will notice it is not that bad. In fact water is life and rain one of the cleanest products produced on this planet. I guarantee you that you will almost embrace it and feel the power of nature by just accepting the fact that you can do nothing about it in that moment and at the end of the day it’s just water hitting your skin. Try it out.
I agree in essence but I dunno about raing being one of the cleanest procust in much of the developed world. ever heard of acid rain? `The amount of pollutants in our atmosphere, I question how pure the rain is in major cities.
Not everyone. I love rainy days, winter. I actually prefer them.
So true. I daily cycling to work and it often rains. UK weather. After few month, my approach was like okay, let it be. I started to see the positivies, its raining, but atleast it isnt snowing and similar examples.
Whenever it rains I just think about how happy my garden will be and I smile.
*wakes up with a cold*
“In your actions, don’t procrastinate. In your conversations, don’t confuse. In your thoughts, don’t wander. In your soul, don’t be passive or aggressive. In your life, don’t be all about business'' Marcus Aurelius
Feels like you stole the name of your channel from better ideas
procrastinating rn
@@ilhomsanokulov MoreGooder Chapter
@@ilhomsanokulov Feels more like inspiration to me rather than stealing. Like, the name of Ideas' is still here and it's not like Chapter is gonna drag away a significant amount of viewers. The channels' videos aren't nearly the same.
@@AliasArsonist then dont
OH MY GOD YOUR B ROLL IS INSANE! I love the color theme and use of neon lights! you inspire not only with your ideas, but your skill too.
This is something I’ve been putting into practice but I’m nowhere near good at it lol although as someone with a history with agoraphobia and anxiety, I apply this to traffic situations, which is great practice. You’re doing awesome work here man, keep it up.
Yyup, same here.
On the intro skit I was like:
Traffic? Yeah, pretty though break. Prob on my nerves. Deep breaths, resolve to absolutely crash that workday for best impression. And prob call in to report the unfortunate situation to direct supervisor. Still shit, but seems the responsible thing to do.
One cranky dude? Why should it bother me? Can see a ton of people going apeshit. But falling in line and perpetrate the cycle of mystery? What good does that do to anyone? Break the wheel, rise above. Fire back a joke "thanks pal, I'll make sure to pleasure my SO tonight" or dunno. Might jank him out the bad mood but at least establish to myself and the others around that my spirit is unshakable. This kinda leans on the preferring a bit of chaos part.
It took around 9 years to get to the point where I am happy and confident to say in a healthy way that I love the way my life looks... So keep on trying, be persistent, learn and adapt and everything will work out on the end ...
Honestly this is probably going to help me out a lot. I tend to get upset at the slightest inconvenience or mistake I make, and it's been really bad on every single aspect of my life. Thank you honestly. I needed this.
Quit gym 15 years ago! Started training in garage lifting rocks doing PUSH UPS on paint cans pull UPS on beams got ripped af at 50 years old!!!
Unsure why, but I found myself crying mind-way through this video. Weren't even sad tears... more so just thinking about our morality as humans and how incredible special it is to experience life, even with all the little annoyances and setbacks. Life is still pretty rad at the end of the day. Great video, btw.
There is nothing like thinking about and delving into the awe that is life. Those tears of wonder are the best.. Life really is marvelous.
Unsure why, but I found myself crying as I was mid-way through eating my ham and cheese sandwich. The cucumbers are just so incredibly beautiful and special, as is the golden brown glow of the crust of the sourdough.
When you accept and understand mortality, you gain a new perspective as you fully realise it will all be gone someday. Everything. The good things, so you better enjoy them as much as you can. And the bad things, so don't worry too much about them. It's empowering and liberating.
I can relate! 🙏💪
@@NoName-vd9rq 😂😭
This has been my life philosophy for such a long time. When I'm late for an important appointment people ask me how I'm so calm. I usually say I just chose to be calm, being angry won't benefit me at all right now.
But to sum up this life philosophy I'd use the phrase "it is what it is"
This video came exactly when I needed it, I've been feeling dejected with my business, my career and have recently been diagnosed with ADHD and GAD. I've been thinking endlessly about my failures, overthinking the things I should or shouldn't have done. I have all these expectations of where I should be and reality isn't meeting that expectation. It's difficult to accept all the crap that has happened to me but avoidance and living in a fake 'dream' world isn't helping. You're right, I need to accept everything happening so I don't feel so out of my depth and overwhelmed all the time. Thank you kindly. :)
The ADHD will be a blessing. Use it to your advantage. Once I got diagnosed with it and understood it, it made alot of sense and changed my perspectives on many things.
I hope you get through these tough times. You got this girl 💕
@@kalpeshparekh429 Same. I turned it from a negative to a superpower when I realized that hyperfocus allows me to learn and internalize vast amounts of information much faster than a neurotypical person. True, I had trouble completing simple tasks, but medication has made it possible for me to develop new, healthy habits. My home is clean and in order and I feel much better now.
@@kalpeshparekh429 Thank you so much for the kind words! It means to so much to know that others understand and have come out stronger on the other side! Well wishes to you! :)
@@manasikakade783 Thank you!! I really appreciate it! :)
Perspective is everything. What I'm really getting out of this is to spend the energy on the important things that we can control. Don't get so hung up on inevitable tragedies whether great or small. Refusing to accept them is refusing to accept reality for what it is, but once we find that acceptance within ourselves, some things just become so much simpler and naturally not worth wasting our energy on. I'm watching over this video again and it really hits different ❤ I see now that this isn't a forced indifference, it's just a change in perspective. It's not about how you feel. It's about what you think. And it's not about not having desires or goals or passions or not wanting efforts to pay off, or never feeling good feelings again. It's about accepting all outcomes-both the positive and the negative.
First off, I really enjoy your videos and always have something to take away, sometimes a lot. This video popped up on my recommended list today, right after I got a call about the cost of upcoming medical testing that I was already extremely nervous about. I immediately got angry, then very depressed. However, I watched this and it really hit me hard. It was exactly what I needed to hear in that moment. I drown in my own negativity about life instead of accepting it and embracing the suck. Thank you for the content you make! It has been truly inspiring to me and I'm sure countless other!
The beautiful advice you gave is what we follow in Islam.
Nothing and no one is eternal.
I lost my sister recently.
Hardest time ever.
But I'm learning to accept it.
One day at a time.
Because it's what was meant to happen. And nothing or no one could've changed it or stopped it from happening.
And it's the legacy we leave behind, (like your helpful videos for example that I read helped a person avoid suicidal thoughts...), (what my sister had taught me and that will help me my entire life...) the way we make people feel...that will matter and live on.
Acceptance lessens the level of pain, frustration, anger...
No matter how hard it is, we should try to learn that events happen for a reason. There's always something positive that comes out from it. Always. No matter how hard or even tragic the event may be. The simplest example of a positive outcome: most of the time, we learn a lesson that will help us deal with other similar situations in the future. In a way or ways that will make those events more bearable.
Love your videos.
They're very helpful. Keep up the good work.
Ruminating on the past and overthinking in general, is like someone slapping you in the face and then you continuing to slap yourself in the face another 99 times.
This is something I practice often, ESPECIALLY at work. Things go wrong and I'm like "oh well, it happens let's see how much of it I can fix if at all" and then I move on. I have a lot of interactions with my coworkers where I'm there completely unphased by an issued and they're stressed and cursing and letting themselves go for a moment. I prefer to stay in the moment and fix what I can and not worry about it much longer afterwards. I'm happy now I have a word for the mindset I've been putting together and thank you so much for fleshing it out for me. I really appreciate it, its nice to have an idea be validated and fleshed out lol.
I was spending the last few days stuck in the corner of my mind. Going for a new job after a long period of lockdown with many things have changed, radically. This new video just popped up and gave me the idea to steer my view to better fit with the current reality.
Have watched many of your videos, but this is the first time I comment: Thank you, Joey! For many ideas you have contributed.
Good luck with your new job!
6:23 “I’ll save production value for the next video”
Love the honesty
I always find myself dabbling in this headspace then Better Ideas comes along and fleshes out a full video that explains what I'm feeling to me. It's really handy keep up the awesome work man its changed so many lives
Everything works out guys. I was diagnosed with MS in late 2019 and I spent a year and a half pretty much lying in bed 24/7 and sleeping all day. I was eating like shit, sleeping at 6am and fell behind all my schoolwork. Now it's December 2021 and I've been going to the gym for a few months and workout out at home on off days, I drink a shit ton of water and watch what I'm eating, I've lost 12kg and reconnected with friends. I've started playing basketball again and started to catch up with my work in time for final exams. Even though my life was so tiring and downright depressing sometimes I kept my head up and always knew it would get better eventually. Never ever give up on yourself Ily all ❤️
This is excellent advice. I'm clinically diagnosed with OCD and this is one of the first things my psychiatrist ever taught me. This lesson has stuck with me ever since and it has helped me so much.
Trying to put this into practice now with my fears and obsessions. I've always understood that the fear causes suffering, but in an entirely different way now, I am questioning whether the suffering is in the fear itself. Maybe I'm afraid of not being able to handle an outcome more than I am afraid of the possibility or randomness itself, and that is an interesting thought. It makes my fears seem more unfounded-not from a logical perspective where I can wrestle with the validity of the fear, but from the perspective that the thing I am wrestling with may not be so insurmountable if I'd only clam down and let myself think beyond the fear and accept it as a possibility I will survive.
I hope you've been doing well still and I'm glad to see the video helped someone else out there. With the right mindset, these really are life changing principles.
My "attitude of acceptance" grew so big that almost nothing bothers me anymore. And it made me stop trying to achieve anything since I started to accept that all I ever wanted is out of reach for good and all within reach is not what I'd desire. It brought me to a point where I couldn't care less whether 8.something billion people around me ever existed. I stopped sharing knowledge, advice, humor and moments with others since I accept my and all the other's complete and utter insignificance in this universe. Yea, acceptance is wonderful. Unless you cross the line of acceptance through insight, then your life turns into a simple wait for its end.
In Buddhism, mindfulness is a _method_ or _tool_ to help you develop "true knowledge". That true knowledge makes you truly unshakeable... the mindfulness is "just" the method that allows you to get there!
If you live thinking of yesterday, you'll be regretful and if you live thinking for tomorrow you'll be anxious. The only way to find peace is to live for the now. I think both Eckhart Tolle and Michael Singer teach Stoic principles. It certainly helps me from spiralling and being present in the moment. Great video 🌻
Earlier this year, I was having severe issues with my partner. I felt like I had no control of the relationship for the longest time, until I realized that the only thing I needed to be in control of was myself. This was when I started thinking about stoicism and the separation between what you can control and what you can't. A few months down the line, my life has changed radically because of the simple shift in mindset. Stoicism is the most powerful tool I know.
im experiencing the same right now, i hope i can do better.
Joey, I think a lot of your content mirrors what I’ve learned in Covey’s 7 Habits of Highly Effective People. The refusal to react to things outside our control is a major piece of the groundwork Covey lays for the rest of the book and he describes the dichotomy as working in your circle of influence rather than wasting time in the “circle of concern” which is stuff outside our control - and as you said, once one learns to work in the circle of influence it expands and the circle of concern shrinks (“becoming a surfer” or “inviting chaos”).
Like so many people your videos have helped put a different spin on certain wisdom for me and made it more real and practical for me. I’m very thankful for the greater degrees of self control you’ve helped me to grasp in practical ways. I am a Christian and that is a major Christian virtue for sure. God bless and thank you for your tremendous positive contribution to the world.
Your timing with this video is impeccable. I just had a friend die recently and it was so sudden and so unexpected and I was just in total shock and started fearing death. And this video was kind of the pep talk I needed to calm down and come back to earth and remember hey, it's all part of life. Of course it's okay and normal to be sad about it and to grieve, but it is easier to handle knowing this.
Also, I'm here for the life is shitty scale. Definitely made me laugh lol
The attitude of acceptance in my life is more like a lesson from God (imo). I’m partaking in a 12 step program and surrendering myself to a God of my understanding. I’m 6 months sober. Life is so much better today than it was 6 months ago, it’s crazy how fast things can change when you take up healthy lifestyle habits.
Thank you for the amazing content that helps me, and God Bless you all! 🙌🏻❤️
This came at a really clutch time for me, as someone that’s been experiencing severe anxiety episodes on and off for 6 months since starting my first career job and graduating from university.
Gonna listen to this one on repeat until I get it
Hey man, thank you for this video (and all the rest of the content of course).
During my Masters's degree in psychology, I often felt overwhelmed by the number of concepts, theories, confusions and often sad conclusions. It's only recently that I've been able to gain some distance and sort things out in my head (good therapy definitely helped too, which I recommend to everyone).
The things you talk about very much fit with "life-changing" concepts for me like the Acceptance and Commitment therapeutic approach and Optimistic Nihilism (refer to the Kurzgesagt video), basically - yeah, life has no meaning and we have no control over many things but it's what allows us to make our own meaning and live according to our chosen values.
Keep up the good work! Thanks!
I was so angry for so long, any little thing or sign of disrespect would send me into a violent rage. Gaining control of my day to day emotions was the first step to me becoming a good man. I almost never break my frame these days.
I was at a pretty low point when I stumbled into Stoicism. The pandemic didn't help things, but the concept of 'radical acceptance' as well as some teachings from Marcus Aurelius have definitely helped me frame things differently from how I would have before. Currently waiting to grab the new book on the teachings of Musonius Rufus to help continue build my practice.
I also got into stoicism at the start of the pandemic. Meditations by Marcus quite frankly changed my life
I wish you lingered more on how to actually turn bad situations happening to you into something positive. Because I think that is even stronger than acceptance. While acceptance is like “Alright, this happened. It’s okay, i will not let this negatively affect my day/life”. But after acceptance, there’s the next ultimate level which involves getting a sort of weird twisted pleasure from something bad happening to you. And i’m not talking about your family dying, but i’m talking about the much more frequent shitty things that happen to us on a daily base (like getting stuck in traffic while being late). With this mindset, when something like this happens, you’re like “Okay, what if i still manage to pull off a great first day at work. That’s gonna be so much more satisfying considering the disatvantage i’m having now” and the outcome is that your much more motivated and determined than you would have been without that happening to you.
Just broke my collar bone and some ribs. Had a rough breakup earlier on. Felt like my life was caving in this past week and today…
The timing of your videos never ceases to amaze me. Thank you, Joey.
As someone who has broken his collarbone 10 years ago, do the at home PT!! You’ll regret not doing it
@@jtrdrew thank you dude, I’ll go ahead and look some up for collar bone breaks. My arm is super claustrophobic being immobilized in this spot. Thanks!
Good luck on both recoveries and happy healing.
Things can and will get better man! Try and hang tough, I just went through a breakup too and I’ve just tried to focus on how much time I have to better myself and give back to me, not anyone else. You’re a champ dude hang in there
@@LandTurtleManGuy thank you bro. I wish you all the luck in your journey :)
Thank you for this video, Joey. A couple of days ago I found myself in a situation that was completely out of my control. There was a flight delay and since I'm a flight-attendant and one of the few representatives of airline during the flight, my passengers blamed me for all things that happened like the weather, bad aircrafts that can not fly in such cold weather and so on. I tried to explain that they would not be forgotten and left in the destination-airport, but the passengers didn't want to listen. I understand that it was a difficult situation and I certainly didn't want to be in their shoes, but I certainly was not the reason of it. I came home completely exhausted, angry and empty. Now, thanks to your video I understand that I must not take it personally. Some situations and certainly people just out of our control. All you have to do is make your best efforts in things which depend on you. And everything bad which inevitably happens helps us to develop and rise above it.
i love how these ideas are already in my mind but this channel always articulates the ideas so well
i love what Joey's talking about in every video from the bottom of my heart actually because this channel seems to be my savior from the shackles of my mind. he helped me to get to the gym, change my habits and think more positively about the reality.
thank you Joey, i hope you're happy
That first scenario happened yesterday, a truck was in front of the traffic. My mom told me to leave, but I quickly said no, and told her to be patient, like she told me. And so after a few minutes, the truck finally moved, and I got to school on time. And I learned patience. Win-win scenario.
"Health is about accepting and perceiving and dealing with reality on reality's terms"
-quote from The Midnight Gospel ep. 1
I usually push through difficult situations with a mindset focusing on personal growth through persevering adversity, but the idea of acceptance and focusing on the bigger picture is very intriguing and something I’m sure I will integrate into my life, thank you!
focus on the things you can control, accept the things you cant. nice
Something that helps me with brutal acceptance is the philosophical idea of "compatibalist determanism'.
The idea is that you have your own free will to choose in life, but there was always one choice that you were going to make and only one way things were going to happen. Keeping that in mind I accept things didn't 'almost work out' and there are no 'what if I...' type situations. There was never any chance of things happening differently and this is the one and only thing that was ever going to happen.
Realizing that then helps you accept the past and focus on making the most of present choices.
Amor Fati
@@Liam-e6q Hadn't heard of that before but love this. (amor fati = "love of one's fate" for those who also didn't know).
Sounds for me like the way of abrahamic religions. Especially Islam preaches such a view of reality.
This idea has been debunked many times now, it's nonsense.
@@Cookiekeks no, it even became a own branch in philosophy
This was the biggest and best realization that helped me a lot a few years ago. A lot of what happens beyond our control isn’t the end of the world. Often, it feeds into our fear of the unknown and our reaction in that unknown is important. A flat tire doesn’t mean your day is ruined, it just means you have an extra step in that day. Maybe you needed to slow down your thoughts and the time waiting in the repair shop is what it takes to process through them.
“Strong minds discuss ideas, average minds discuss events, weak minds discuss people.” ~Socrates
This video is so insightful that I randomly remembered it and came back to re-watch it because I need to implement this into my life.
Wow. I didn't realize until watching this video that I've practically made a career out of this concept; I didn't even know there was a name for it. Every time I've outperformed my peers in my field, my bosses have always praised my ability to stay calm and they always ask about my method. When times get tough or stressful I just zoom out more, into next week or next month, making the present stress seem a lot smaller in comparison. Eventually it became a part of my character and it's served me super well in some of the toughest situations inside and outside the workplace.
I'm definitely going to read up on stoicism now
This is exactly how I am feeling lately, I discovered it myself so It's refreshing to know someone else also felt like it.
Thank you for all your work Joey! You've helped this random internet stranger immensely over the last few years. May this unverifiable act of thankfulness serve to boost the algorithm, if nothing else. Love ❤️
The background music and the rain is very relaxing.
The overview of this video: Always be aware of the worst possible outcomes that life can throw at you in any given situation. You will not be able to control most of these situations, so don't worry about getting upset or stressing about it. Instead, focus on the variables you CAN control in order to decrease the severity of your downfall in your inevitable bad situations :)
Love this. Really makes you feel in control when you just accept the bad things that happen as life experiences, focus on what you can learn from them and then move on.
Great video Joey, sometimes though life's shit can get way too overwhelming like I was watching the news and there was a story about how a child got kidnapped and it just made me think gosh what the parents must be going through... radical acceptance must be extremely hard in such a scenario
This year has been the worst for me
I lost my grandfather( on February) he was very close fo me, He was actually like my father, I also lived with him, and I lost my father recently he was on life support for like 3 months and it was really a very traumatic experience in that period of time... Losing both of them was really hard for me as it was so surprising and unexpected that I am still on shock.
So I still get sad sometimes and in those hard times I could not focus on my studies. I have too much load now and tests are coming.
I was very down today and almost broken, I was confessing to god to give me strength and clarity about myself.
And here you are!
Thanks for the video
Even expressing myself in the comments can really make me feel good about myself
Glad youre sharing this stuff, no doubt the best psychology guy on youtube. Keep up the good work 👌
i tried to use this because i was nauseously anxious about an interview and honestly it helped
Kandinsky, in his abstract paintings, would mean different things with shapes and colours (it's also written in some of his books). Shapes are intentions, while colours are emotions. They've always inspired me to consider the difference between rational responses and emotional ones. Both can make sense, even better together; just know that the immediate shine of colour is not often what leads the composition, but black shapes.
Thank you, Bro!
Your videos help a lot!
That is decent advice for each of us.
Each of us lives in our minds.
Our expectations create a picture of our future.
But the world around us creates a reality.
In the previous year, I was anxious about the obstacles in my career path and the insufficiency of the opportunities.
But now, when my country is at war (I'm from Ukraine) and near my city, russian terroristic forces are shelling the missiles, I’m deeply reviewing my attitude to life, problems, and happiness.
In the morning, I’m happy that I am alive and woke up and able to see my family.
During the day, I’m happy that I have a meal, and I see the sun (or cloud, or rain).
In the evening - that God gave us this blissful day )
We should be more thankful for what we have! And happiness happening ))
Ya know, I see things this way naturally after years of stoic practice. Almost nothing phases me, and if it does it is incredibly brief. Frankly, the only thing that ever seems to bother me at all is just how insanely emotional people are about every...single...inconsequential...thing. But even then I end up seeing it compassionately after some reframing. This takes practice, but it's worth it. I'm happy just to be alive at this point. Even the "bad" times are a bonus, as I get free opportunities to grow. Anywhos, the best philosophical marriage of all time as I see it right now is Stoicism and Buddhism. Don't sleep on it, folks. It's all there.
Great video, thanks. Also I would love to hear you talking more about stoicism. About virtues, amor fati and main principles of stoicism. For example, how to control your perception and redirect your emotions, how to change your perspective on the bad things and learn how to accept them, etc. I think there's a lot more you can tell ppl about stoicism and it's really necessary at this difficult times
"i'm switching to final cut pro" PERFECT response 😂👏🏼💯
Idk man but everytime this guy drops a video, it’s like free therapy! Very grateful for every content you’ve done! It’s hard to not click any of it at all 🥺
It’s been a year and some change but I was introduced to Stoicism through a Pewdiepie video. “Happiness and freedom begin with a clear understanding of one principle: Some things are within our control, and some things are not
-Epictetus” -Pewdiepie -Me
Powerful stuff
And sometimes the things out of our control have and influence on the things in our control. Or affect on how we react or influence those controllable things.
I used to be really constipated, and then I found this channel. I'm still constipated, but now I watch this channel.
Extraordinary person reading this, you are not define by your circumstance or your past. It’s not what happened to you that determines your success in life; it is how you deal with those circumstances that determines your success in life! You are strong, you are capable and practice forgiveness and gratitude everyday. This will change the course of your life forever! Love you always and I believe in you wholeheartedly ✨❤️ - Nat
Can you please stop with this tired ass comment. You paste it on too many vids. Makes you look watered down and disingenuous.
@@MurdaStreams I agree, end this shi
I don’t know what sparked it, but I developed this trait probably throughout high school, and it has been one of my biggest strengths and served me incredibly well in life. 10/10 would recommend.
I accidentally found stoicism at the age 10 due to a friend committing suicide. Never left stoicism since.
Going through subscriptions and doing a clean up. I always plan to watch your vids and don't really get round to it. I've found value in quite a few so thought I'd come back and see if I still did.
It's funny how the universe works.
In September this year, our mortgage interest rates are going up so high that we don't know how we're going to pay it yet.
I've been so depressed that I have no idea what to do with myself, everyone stresses me out and nothing seems exciting to me.
This video put me in that mood that I'm happiest: the acceptance of all things.
I have read Eckhart Tolle's work but will definitely be looking into stoicism. It sounds similar.
Thanks Joey. This isn't the first time you've snapped me out of my own shit. Just thanks.
Something that really helped me, in my life, is asking myself: what would X philosopher do in this situation? What would Marcus Aurelius do? How would he react?
Suffering is the difference between your expectations and your current reality.
When you realise you are in control of this expectations, you are truly liberated. This doesn’t make you less driven, quite the opposite.
The limiting tension, the crippling perfectionism is gone, and you are unstoppable.
More importantly, you are truly in the moment as it is, rather that in an imagined expected scenario.
I just saw a clip of blond middle-aged woman yelling and screaming profanity at an airport before this vid. Idk why she did it, but this proves Stoicism is really needed today as it did then
I've been learning to do this without even realizing it. Over the past year, I've had infuriatingly bad luck regarding technology, causing me to miss out on some important things, and set my goals back some months. Sometimes I've wondered if someone was playing a huge cosmic joke on me, until I remember that much worse has happened to other people, and there was probably something I could've done about it.
My solution's to challenge myself for a year to not procrastinate on any hard work regarding my goals, and to be as efficient with my time and resources as possible while staying sane. Make it so if there is some cosmic force with a grudge against me, they'll have to hit me with some pretty off-the-chain bad luck to stop me.
I'll still have an enemy, but at least I'll know it's not me.
Today I learned Portland was named by a coin flip. Had the coin landed the other way, the city would be Boston, Oregon.
One of my favorite fun facts of my city
@@Magooinvesting This is probably a bot. . .
@@gaming4K oh…….
You're videos actually have helped a lot got into college, lost 40lbs, WAYYY more social too! Finally taking control over my life 👍👍
I think I've been living like this for a good while now and it's actually pretty dope. I can see it fairly often when friends get upset over minor issues I didn't even notice. Like the train is late and I am like yeah who gives a shit, then I will be 15min late for lecture, so be it. Radical Acceptness really is the key, things always work out in the end.
When you accept things, you don't feel negative about them anymore. However, you need to feel negative about bad things inorder to improve yourself. So, how can you logically find motivation to do anything when you radically accept your life as it is? Such an idea is not something I expect from a self improvement channel
I just lost my father on October 31 2021 he died in my arms on a hunting trip. He was 56 years old, and I didn't see it coming.
I will definitely try to apply this mindset immediately. Thank you
You are a true inspiration, Joey. You've add so much value to my life through your work, and, in fact, you helped inspire me to start creating content on TH-cam! Keep the fantastic content coming, my Stoic brother!
Thank you so much. I’m passing through a breakout in a 8 years relationship and now I see that it isn’t only about what I want so I need to accept that this decision is out of my control now
Thanks Joey! Stoicism really works. Stoicism allowed me to throat punch like Liam Neeson on Taken. Thank you stoicism! 😂
We all need this reminder. Thank you
The Jason Statham of TH-cam
I’ve come back to watch this a few times. I honestly think it’s the best TH-cam video I’ve ever seen. Love your channel and looking forward to watching more of your videos!
Ah yes the Jason Statham of youtube
Thanks a lot for your videos, you speak to people in a way that makes me feel sad about the therapist I had
Nailed the catholic priest impression.
This is one of your best videos to date, we really do have a fundimental view of the way we think the world is , and then we freak out when shitty things keep on happening. Its never been explained to me like that. wow
he's the jason statham of youtube!!!
Hi joey . On point and on heart as always. Thank you so much.
My day started out on a bad note, but this video really made me calm down, thank you
How nice it is to see people talk about Epictetus and Seneca and bring their ideas forward into this century. We all need them, but in an easier format to digest 😅
this literally changed my life Ialways read up on stoicism but come 2020 I really put it into practice and it has changed everything! "Just that you do the right thing. The rest doesn't matter" that right there is the key to me. As long as I do my part to the best of my ability everything else that's out of my control is just that...out of my control. It's helped me stay humble and just live...I realized that what I can control is my reactions to certain situations.
can't remember where i read this but this could serve - "all anger stems from a betrayal of expectations. Manage your expectations and there will be no anger."
you didn't expect a traffic jam, someone to pour a drink on you, your partner to not listen attentively and just brush off your bad day. Yet it happens and in some way it is well within
the realms of reason/chances of those things happening to you
I love how he has this little grin on his face as he says the word "shit" multiple times.
F#@k yes!!! Keeping it real. Love it.
Was in a bad mindset and this just put me back on track thank you so much
I wish I had seen your videos earlier in life. I have had a lot of hard times because of mental blocks placed on myself from just existing. Recently I have started to emerge from a mental funk, and this content I know is going to be helpful.
Thank you so much for the stoicism exercise and idea! really helped me!
Yeah, I do this all the time.
Nothing phases me. My friends and family are astounded that having broken both legs, broken my back twice, ribs, knee-caps, and even having had my jaw ripped off and going into a 5 day coma, that I treat all that comes equanimously.
Don't get upset, get on with it. Each new moment is a potential new opportunity.
The mindset of Buddhist practitioners helped me to reach this state of acceptance. Though I do not claim to be a Buddhist.
Every faith, or no faith at all can lead you to this path.
Done and Done. Thanks for the clip today. Nice reminder so I can keep going with my life