Made this video while I was on the road, so it's a bit more stripped down and conversational. Would love to hear your thoughts on some of this stuff. I felt strongly like I should give you guys the reverse perspective of the last video. But if you haven't checked out the previous video, I'd highly recommend. It's metal af: th-cam.com/video/ofdiMd3P5h4/w-d-xo.html Also, how are you guys doing?
Job terminated me, but because I worked on my skills for the past 4 years, I already have another technical job sorted out. Thanks in part to your content
I'm doing very well thanks to all these nice videos of yours i've recently found about. I share them with my friends and apply your advise constantly. Thank you so much
Tried to summarise: 1. Have a goal. Write in detail what you want your life to look like. Make your goals specific. 2. Step out of the cave. Stop spending so much time inside doing monotonous things/spending time in front of screens. Step outside. Try and socialize. 3. Take risks. Life is inherently risky. There are many things out of our control that cause pain. Might as well take the risks of trying something you actually want to do even if it involves failing, no? It is empowering to try. It's risky to *avoid* risk and just be comfortable. 4. Get out of your head. Just start the thing before you can even think about it. Before you give yourself time to hesitate. 5. Produce. Produce more than you consume. Creating more than consuming brings more excitement into your life. Like watching videos? Make one. Like looking at photographs? Take one. 6. Welcome feedback. You do not know everything. Surround yourself with people who challenge you and hold you to a higher standard. 7. Be Vulnerable. Don't be afraid to be emotionally vulnerable and honest to your inner circle. Find the courage to let people you trust in, let them see your flaws. Because these flaws would otherwise thrive in secrecy. 8. Embrace conflict. If someone has wronged you, don't say that it's okay. It's not okay. If you say it's okay, it's likely that person might take advantage of you in the future. It also implies you don't respect yourself and your boundaries. Risk a little discomfort to increase your self respect. 9. Don't play Runescape lol 10. Be optimistic. Life is hard, there's no shortage of obstacles, so why focus on the negative? You'd just be adding to them obstacles. Seek to find the good in all situations. Take a moment to think about what you're grateful for. Try to monitor your thoughts/be more mindful about the stories you tell yourself and recognise the tone. The last person who should be robbing you of encouragement is yourself. Good luck guys :)
3:39 "let people know your name" I love when super simple, almost annoyingly obvious, statements contain within them so much.....wisdom? potential? power? I don't know exactly the word, but that simple idea speaks so loudly to me. And there's so much detail in that word "let". It's not "make people know your name" it's not assertive advice, but just allow yourself to be part of society, allow yourself to speak, to be seen and partake in society. SO much meat here!
The ones I struggle with the most are: - Taking risks - Getting out of my head - Embracing conflict - Being optimistic. You really articulated why these are so important, which is extremely helpful. Thanks Joey! 🙂
I’m an 18 year old first year university student. My essay is due tomorrow and I had a month to do it. But I had been over planning and overthinking how great it’ll be once I finally get down to doing it. Look at me now. Several hours before submission date. I resonate with every word that you’ve said. I over consume “productive” content and it doesn’t even help me. I watch all these videos to learn how to do my thing better yet never do it because I keep watching. So I’m really grateful for this! Thank you
Your current situation reminds me about an experiment conducted by scientists about which I read. It started out by the scientists taking various groups and individual students and gave them a project of capturing the perfect picture. The best one would win a grand prize. Majority of the groups waited for the best photo to capture and never captured any whereas 1 group decided on a different strategy. They would take picture of everything that they found to be photogenic. They ended clicking more than 200 photos and from that they selected the best one to submit. As you may have guessed, this group won the contest because they didn't wait for the perfect opportunity. They just took every opportunity and *tried* to make the best of it.
@@Thinkaboutit897 wow. You know what, this really applies to me. I always wait for the perfect time to carry out somethunh. Nyil the due date is there and flight or fight kicks in. I dont do my best but the minimum. Leaves me ashamed because I was planning perfection
I'm also an 18 years old university student in a quite similar situatuion, 2022 has been a year with many ups and downs for me, sometimes I feel angry and tire after.
The part where you said about taking risks was mind blowing for me... I took a risk in the last year that I regret for, it was a mistake, but as you said, we can't avoid risks in life. We have to confront our conflicts and not run away from them, like you said. Thanks for this video.
It makes me feel better knowing I’m not the only one going through these issues. I hope everyone here figures them out. At 26 I feel so old but need to realize It’s the perfect time to completely transform
sometimes when im stuck doing nothing productive, i tell myself to watch 1 video from betterideas which is relevant for me, and then start doing what im supposed to do. He really showed me some mistakes ive been making and i truly believe his videos are part of the reason why im getting less depressive episodes ❤️
It's the overthinking that I struggle with a lot personally. I feel like my life has literally become this sort of meta form of living where I'm constantly planning on things I want to change but then never doing any of them, feeling miserable as a result. I would love a whole video on tip number 4 alone tbh.
I suggest reading the book Chatter from Ethan Ross. It explains the overthinking part of our inside voice and how to be conscious of this fact and use our internal thinking for the better. The voice inside our head will never stop so why use it to do harm to yourself? This is a question for everyone including me. If you have plans of reading i suggest this book as it explains in details why we have this chatter that can spiral into overthinking.
Shit, It's like you're describing me. Huge chaotic pile of thoughts in my head that I need to finally start doing this and that, change this and that, stop doing this thing and that thing... And the result is always the same. I fall into a stupor and procrastination and do nothing. As a result I hate myself for this so much that I start feeling hopeless
Striking up conversations with strangers is one of the best motivators for me because I work at a grocery store and I love my job. It's like practice for customer service and it makes my capability for patience shoot through the roof
Every thing you hate about yourself is just a part that loves you and wants to protect you, even a self harming one just wants the physical pain to protect you from unbearable emotional pain and if you just took a time to listen to it and love it back, it might become your greatest gift.
What if you hate the world? What if you hate society, and people, and treachery and life itself? What if you hate everything for mistreating you? I apologise for complaining, I just see how wise you are, and hope to be taught by someone as compassionate and (seemingly) hopeful as you are
@@Blessed_V0id This is exactly how I've felt for the longest time. Wow. Actually taken aback by how much this has described me to a tee. What do we do if we feel this way?
@@punishedvenomsnake716 Survive. Be the hero that was never there for you. Make a better world, so that no one you meet has to feel the pain you have, unless they deserve it. Save your hate for evil, and help anything good grow strong. I believe in you
This video was timely. I’ve been through a traumatic breakup recently and fallen into a rut. Moving, going outside, avoiding my phone, talking to people, working on my goals, these things have been helping me get through it 🖤
I've been in a depressed rut for the past few weeks, so now that I know you read these comments I just wanna say thank you for your videos. They helped me a lot.
I know I’m a heavy pessimist, my friend pointed out to my last night when I was having a rough day. She told me I always look for the negatives in any situation. Ever since she said that it really changed my outlook. I do look at situations as a bad, horrible thing for my life instead of looking for a positive way around any bad situations. Thanks for making this video I really appreciate it! -Alex
Best of luck to you. Its not your fault your pessimistic, but you deserve better for you...plus it can lead to you loosing what little good things you have. Life isn't supposed to be so terrible, so try to enjoy it while you can friend
Fantastic that you arrived at this place! I was blessed years ago by a dear friend, with incredible advice that I took to heart and pursued. Things aren’t, ever perfect, but our outlook, our pursuits, matter above everything around us and what’s coming at us. I’ll give you this simple thing. Be consciously aware of the things you consume. The web, the media, everything that’s bombarding you, is typically as negative as it gets. Cease, and desist, don’t click on it. Pursue answers, pursue light. It’s tough, it’s not easy and from time to time you’ll fall off the train. Get back on, and continue.
@@freckles4603 This is a damn good point freckles. I’ll second that with a “tend to your garden”. Everyone is guilty of it, we all have opinions about others games. I’ve always stated to my kids and anyone else that’s listening, play YOUR game and if you are focussed there? You won’t have time to criticize others.
@@freckles4603 true, like pretty much everything else in life, a healthy balance of optimism and pessimism will make you wiser and stronger than most people
The part you said about taking risks and trying than being apathetic really spoke to me. You really called me out. I think I'm ready to make some big adjustments now. Thank you for this video💗
this honestly helped me get out of the depressive slump i'd been in for the past 2 weeks, i always thought that am not thinking things well enough but what i'd been lacking was the idea of shutting my overthinking & actually start studying rather than procrastinating my way through
I have always thought that I knew myself pretty well and was very self aware, but I needed this video to help me realize that I am still a work in progress and that is okay. The things that I struggle with are: being optimistic, being vulnerable & taking risks. After starting a full-time position in Big Four Accounting, I have seen changes in myself, how I treat others, how I view life, etc. I have spent the past year obsessing over trying to be good at what I do ( I still feel like I am clueless), but my overall happiness and well-being are invaluable and should not be sacrificed for a 9-5. I have avoided setting any personal goals for myself and have been living day by day, just rolling with the punches. I need a set concrete goals to achieve for myself and start doing things that make me happy. Thank you for this 😌
Thanks for this Joey. Embracing conflict is one I've really struggled with, especially the last few years. It's so hard to tell people "no", and I try so hard not to argue with anyone. I honestly hate how much value I place on people's perception of me, but I feel trapped. Maybe my greatest fear is that if I speak up or put my foot down then I'll be shunned by the people closest to me. But in so doing I've started to despise the people closest to me. It probably doesn't help either that I'm fairly good at hiding my emotions. So...yeah, needless to say I wanna work on this one. Oh, also Overthinking & Being Vulnerable. Those one's too.
I appreciate how you're able to repackage the same message so many times with such patience. because it really is so simple on its face. go outside and live your life! but when you're stuck in old patterns, videos like this are such a good reminder. I should use that Inaction is a Slow Death hoodie as wall decor for a daily reminder lol.
I'm glad you touched on the gratitude journals on the last point, and would offer a counter-point: Start a journal where you write down upcoming tasks and current thoughts. It helps to stay organized, and keep a physical copy of your responsibilities. Your first point about goals is much easier to work towards when you have them written down and can reference them over time, instead of forgetting them months later. Also, seeing my current thoughts and looking back a week/month/year later helps myself see what I was actively doing to work towards my goals, and how it affected me overall to improve/maintain a healthy lifestyle for the future. Plus it helps to stay on task, such as when you have school projects coming up and can see how much time you've actually dedicated to them so far. Glad to see this video pop up in my feed! Would be great to see new content dedicated to factors such as sleep and exercise, and how they're important to maintain these healthy changes.
Number 7 hit me hard, I was emotionally volnurable with a very good friend which then attacked me with my own traumas she knew about me and I felt betrayed for days, less for the words but more for the broken trust I had in her. Emotional volnurability is a weapon which can be used for healing or destruction so you need to think deep before giving it to someone.
I have been passing through a lot of "work on yourself"-videos, and a lot of them have been great, but you somehow struck a chord with me. I like the way you deliver things, and I like the fact that you repeat some fundamentals that simply need to be repeated. I feel like you cut through the BS and get to it. It's up to me now to make the changes that can better my life. I also love the fact that you adress the platform that provides you money; TH-cam, which is inherently addictive.
I always subconsciously click on your videos and enjoy how much effort you put in it. It's like being reminded of why I'm on this planet. Thank you so much for keeping up the hard work, so I (and many others) can do, too!
I’ve watched that particular “how to ruin your life” vid this summer and subscribed after that. For a long time i’ve been seeing your vids and left them “for later”. Lately i started noticing that my life is going downhill, i sunk in demotivation and procrastination - just like in that video… and i told myself that i would rebuild my routine, prepare for the exams and start working out. Today is that day. I was going to look up some tutorial on youtube and saw this fresh released vid. For me that really seems like a sign that it IS the right time and it truly boosted my motivation. Thank you all!
It’s funny how your last video had 1.7 million plus views and this one has about 300k views after two weeks, considering these are the steps to get out of those “ruts” or “bad habits”. It’s like people don’t want to get out of those. Like Alejandro Jodorowsky says that we’re in this cage that we created ourselves. But the door is open and we say that we want to get out but we don’t and the door is completely open. Great video. I will be working on myself a lot more. Last one hit a cord and this one is like a light at the end of the tunnel… or an open door to my cage. Thank you.
I agree, I often watch these and fail after a bit. I think we just need to accept it's going to suck, we need to stop being easy on ourselves and bailing out at the first encounter of uncomfortably
"Melancholy. The ache of doubt that stiffens to paralysis. Paralysis that breeds despair. This was once a place of refuge for you. But it has become a prison, a prison you constructed to protect yourself. From pain. From risk. From life itself. You are the architect."
@@HiiImChris I use this mantra when I sense that I'm slipping: "Your mind is fighting itself. It remembers the pain of life. It's trying to protect you from it. Keep going."
I realised that doing things i hate for enough time makes me build a habit, this habit might be healthy but its still annoying to do. I still do it like taking cold showers everyday, i always feel obligated to take this shower but now i just kinda do it. SOmetimes i struggle sometimes its just getting over with it. From 7 months ago when i started, it felt awful and i couldnt do it 3 days a streak. But i forced myself to consistently go through it. This made me more familier with, discomfort and so i dared to do harder things to challenge myself. I now go to the Gym and i still mostly feel like shit. But these 7 months have improved me so so so much and i learned so much. I started getting professional help and i found that i had some diagnosis like ADD and perhaps Aspergers. Life is still tough but, i feel like the hard part is being uncomfortable, but when you are uncomfortable enough you ultimately feel better and better about it. I dont know what anyone is going through, i know that i went through hell. I didn't get help from God it was either me laying in my bed for days and never feeling good or me showing up to challenges and beating them 1 after 1. I was severe depressed, atleast thats what i was diagnosed with. You aren't obligated to become better, we love you the way you are. The question you need to awnser is, do you want a better life? if yes then take it ^^
The taking risk of talking to people randomly really spoke to me. I have social anxiety, I just gotta not give a shit about what people think of me, and not worry about how to talk with people. Just do it, what can go wrong!
Stepping out into the world is my favorite point. It’s probably the most powerful way here to get out of a rut, to just go out, talk to anyone, admire nature, observe, breathe and let it all go. This is probably the most effective way for me. 💯💪🏼
I just love the kind of advice you give. I have this friend who is really lost in life. Wish he would hear and take these lessons to heart, but I've tried twice and I think he actively avoids this kind of content. People need to get that they are the only force capable of changing their lives. Otherwise there's nothing to be said or done.
I couldn't have heard this at a better time. Over the last year I worked myself out of the worst mental health I've ever had. Anxiety and depression along with feeling like your life is going nowhere is a tough one, topped off by your long term relationship ending badly. I'm not a better, healthier person than I've been in the last 5 years but I've reached a point where I don't know what to do next, and this video has outlined that perfectly. It's time to move onto the next stage. First the goal was getting back to a healthy place, next it's time to blossom into the world.
thank you so much for doing this video. the last one hit really hard, but i couldn’t really find strength in myself to figure out how to un-ruin my life. i’m sure this one will help, thank you
Your videos have brought most change to my life, because they are simple and straight to the point. Also bring out the super obvious things that my oblivious self just looked past lol
As the italian comedic actor Roberto Benigni said "starting a new path scares us, but after our first steps we realize how dangerous staying still was"
I’m an introvert and I have started doing virtual tours in London. I’m feeling more productive. Every time o get a view and a subscriber, it’s party time! It’s these little things that are keeping me going. I’m getting the internal fulfilment. It’s very encouraging.
im 13, i was sedentary, extremely undisciplined and extremely sedentary, YOU are making me change my life. i hope that next year i become better and better on pursuing my dreams...❤💪
I be watching these after breakups that totally break me mentally and physically. Thank You Man. It helps me pick up the pieces of myself and try to be content with my own reflection instead of hating who I am. You only live once. Taking care and loving yourself is def one of the most important things u can do.
Step 3 really hit home. For years, I’ve been avoiding things whether it be because I’m scared or because of social interaction. Nowadays it’s talking to a girl I like. I’ve been putting it off for months because I’m scared of her rejecting me. But once Monday comes I’m going to walk in her office and strike up a conversation with her. I had the idea of making a little something ahead of time so it gives me a clear reason to talk to her and not just go in not knowing what to talk about. But my goal from now until next year today is to take more risks
Im a 15 y/o student in 11th grade and I had two weeks of holiday to do a video, read two books, make an oral presentation, do 4 text analysis, revise maths and physics, do geography exercises, prepare for an English essay and revise for a French test. I did nothing cuz I overthought too much about it and now I have Saturday and Sunday to do all that I feel super stressed and overwhelmed but in the end is all my fault cuz I procrastinated too much for nothing. Thanks to you now I’ll start do my homeworks earlier and with more efficiency
I don't know if you're a religious person but I really appreciated the comment you made about the confession, also the fact of exposing your dark side verbally makes it clearer to yourself and allows you to fight it in the best way! Thanks for everything you do
Thank you so much for this channel. So refreshing to discover personal development content that is actually honest, sourced and deontologic, and doesn't just resolve around an endless cycle of "you must be better in order to be better" self-depreciation bullsh**. I'm gonna struggle a lot especially with the "stop isolating" part but hey at least I'm on the path. Keep it up man
Talking about life throwing you challenges - I dropped out of 3 degrees, at 3 different universities for a different reason each time. But mostly because I wasn't sure what I was doing with it and well was I enjoying it? Social side but not the course, and even that went down hill by the 3rd uni.
Thank you so much for making this video! It's so relatable and thought-provoking. The one thing that stuck with me was the "empowering rejection." I am keeping this newly found phrase to look at failure and rejection from a different angle.
I start understanding these things only after making all of this in my life and taking the great amount of suffering. This video found me in right time.
Keep in mind that having goals doesn't just mean long term. It is important to balance between long and mid to short term, because if you pile on all these huge goals, it makes it really hard to make day to day changes. Make sure to appreciate the small accomplishments you make everyday.
As always you are very inspiring. Tonight I am feeling the need to recover from a period of apathy, anxiety and low motivation. I am about to go to bed but tomorrow I will put more effort into putting these tips into practice. Thank you very much.
I deeply appreciate that you demonstrated optimism while the motorbike drove by many times. Actually made me put the label of pessimism to my driving mind.
Your videos have been so helpful for me. I'm one of those people who can never focus on anything, I'm always procrastinating and daydreaming. But binge-watching your videos has helped me see that there is so much that I can become. I actually got up to go to the gym today. Insane! And also, you're utterly hilarious. You remind me of myself but better.
I think my main struggle is with the first one. It’s pretty rough to have a problem like this when I’m a college freshman. I have no idea what to major in. I get so many suggestions but I really have no idea what I want. It’s the amount of possibilities that I feel are overwhelming. I definitely think I could get out some more as well. I think that risk is something I got to get over still. I think I’m getting better at not overthinking. I really enjoy consuming media but I do think that I should try to start to make things. I don’t know what I’m going to make, but probably TH-cam. I think I’ve been getting better at listening to other’s perspectives. I think I’ve been taking criticism a lot better recently. If someone complains about the way I do something, I always ask what I did wrong and what I can do better. My belief is that feedback is the most important resource. I am ashamed of some things I do, like over eating. I think I could definitely work up to purging my bad habits with help from friends. I don’t think anybody’s been a dick to me recently. I definitely have tried to mellow out over the years but I will never let someone just get away with being a dick. I do think I’m getting better at being optimistic. I’ve never really had a problem with this. What about all of you guys?
1:31 I cracked it. He's the human representation of the iconic runescape bot! Lol but in all seriousness, thanks for these videos. I feel an incremental shift in my mental trajectory after watching these
although i completely understand where others are coming from.. i decided to realize after watching the other video that it really was on me and sitting there and sulking about my life wasn't going to do anything. before jumping into goals and future plans, i decided to go on a health journey first. mentally and physically. it's been pretty rough, but there has been some changes as well. It has definitely crossed my mind where I've felt exactly the same as others and blamed people for being insensitive and such, but that didn't do anything for me. I was just focusing over and over again how no one cares or they're so quick to judge. it doesn't matter though. they will do what they do no matter how you're doing. so use everyone's judgements and negative actions into tools for yourself. Being so broken and then healing will only make us better people because we will be more balanced to know how it feels for both ends. We can be better than anyone else that hasn't been through all that life has to offer, whether it be depression or miracles. Let's go!
Two quotes that have gotten me through some tough times in my life: “The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way” - Marcus Aurelius. “It is better to conquer grief then to deceive it” - Seneca Keep pushing through the fog, and eventually you’ll make it to your destination. Stay safe friends.
Thank God you have a follow up video. I would've driven myself mad with despair from relating to the last video so hard but here you essentially say the same things but on the opposite side of the respective spectrum. This is life saving advice and I'm going to try my hardest to follow these steps.
On #1, ive tried multiple time to look at what I want my life to look like. However, it always makes me depressed because I feel like I need to have a path I want to take (because of video/ social media constantly telling me I need to have one) but I cant find things I want to personnaly achieve. Most of the things people point to (gf, money, bigger muscle) to me are all external stuff and does not motivate me.
Phone won’t let me edit but I would like to hear others opinion on this and recommandation/ if they have similar experience. Maybe someone will say something that will change my mind/ make me reflect.
I want to say thank you. Today was an absolute shit day, I felt like I was in a pit of despair. But then after so many hours into the day, I remembered. “Don’t think, just do” I remembered how you explained to not think so much into the littlest things. So then realized, nothing was going to change if I don’t act upon it. So slowly but surely I started to do small things to make my day more meaningful. Things I thought about too hard on. I feel that if I didn’t watch this video I wouldn’t have been able to go through this day. So thank you. Really. I really hope I stick to this advice the rest of my life.
This video has lead me to understand what is going on with me. My life has made a huge shift in the past 10 years. I haven't taken the time to sit and figure out what direction I'm going in now. What steps I need to take to redo my life. Instead I was feeling that now I am failing at things I had wanted to do in my life. Well, I didn't "fail", it's just time to figure out a new plan. So thanks for giving some direction on how to figure out what's NEXT
I struggle the most with regret over not taking risks out of fear of failure and instead listening to other peoples opinions as to how I should run my life.
Hello first of all I want to thank you for being strong and be leting others know they are not alone.. I’m 24, dropped out of uni after having bad time management on a foreign country… it sucks wish I had a goal something to love to do
You know this is the one video that literally saved me years of my life because I am damn sure that you learn these lessons in your life by getting hit by challenges but these lessons gave me the awareness I needed to fight against some of the challenges in life.
About "producing more than consuming" makes total sense... If we watch TikTok videos, TH-cam shorts on a great part of the day we don't feel good in the end of the day.... But if we produce more than consuming, in the end of the day, we feel like "mission accomplished", with a great feel and proud.
This was extremely helpful. It's been three months since I've started feeling lonely and slowly sadder, but this video managed to shine a ray of light on my situations (sounds exaggerated, but it is not)
I really appreciate your videos because I think they can be applied to almost anyone’s life. And at any stage of life I feel like it’s something I need to hear. I think I struggle the most with optimism, because although rarely I’m unrealistically positive, it’s always been part of my personality to have a cynical, dry sense of humor. I would say it’s really annoying to have at least one person a day tell me I should be more optimistic. I’m trying to even it out more, I swear! Thanks for the reminder!
It's okay to be this way! It has literally to do with our genetics if we're rather pessimistic or rather optimistic. You don't have to fake your personailty. I personally think it's important that there are people that are more pessimistic than others, because they see things from a different angle, and lots of times we need to have different views to create a good solution. Ofcourse having a gratitude journal and looking on the bright side of life from time to time is beneficial for everyone. 🦛
1.Have a goal and aim for it 2.Step out of the cave 3.Take risks 4.Get out of your heard 5.Produce more than you consume 6.Welcome feedback 7.Be vulnerable 8.Embrace conflict 9.No videogames 10.Optimism
Thank you so much. My son is in a very bad place and it's so devastating to see. I send him your videos, and pray to the gods, that he watches them. As a mom, it's so heartbreaking.
The previous video was AMAZING! It put everything into amazing perspective! It was my favorite work of yours yet. It was SO important that I hear all those ways I've been hurting myself during what I'm going through in recent years.. The ways in which i' ve been ruining my life. I love this breakdown as well. Thank you so much for all of the time and work you put into your videos.
Hi, I usually never comment on videos but I have been loving your videos and they help me so much as I’m going through some difficult times. I come from a place full of anxiety and feeling bad about myself and your videos teach me how to take care of myself. As much as I love your videos, I also have anxiety deciding if I’m gonna click on them because the titels often have negative vibe around them, using the words ‘ruining your life’, ‘stop doing …’, etc. Maybe the titels are just confronting me with myself, but i do think the bad vibes of the titels don’t match the good vibes of the actual videos themselves. I just wanted to give you this feedback. Thank you for all that you do and I hope to continue to learn and grow from your content.
Totally get it. It's always a tough balance, because due to negativity bias (a legitimate psychological phenomenon), people are far more likely to click on titles that tell them to stop doing a bad thing, rather than to start doing a good one. So if the content of the video itself is encouraging, but nobody watches the video, then nobody is encouraged. On the other hand, I typically like to spread out the negative titles a bit more, and the negative titles have been a bit more common recently, so expect happier titles for a while going forward :)
Sort of stream of conscious here but, it's so disappointing watching all of these videos and never applying the advice consistently. But what you've said about producing more than consuming is kinda what I needed to hear. No matter how many self improvement videos I watch, they'll never bring any real value into my life if I don't just start doing the shit I so desperately want to do. Anyways I appreciate your videos a lot and this one was beautifully shot and edited too, always love the color grade! Thanks Joey
You're not alone in that struggle. Go easy on yourself. Applying this advice is hard, and the fact you're seeking videos like this one out means you're on the right path. Part of why it's hard is the sheer volume of advice. Pick the one item that most resonates and focus on that above everything else. For me, exercise is a foundational habit. For you it might be working on a particular project. Don't try to change everything all at once
@@TheBswan You're right, trying to do everything all at once is where it usually gets difficult. Focusing on one thing at a time is doable. Thank you and all the luck to you on your own process, bless you:))
*a tribute to those with my attention span* _(note: joey explains it way better)_ - have a goal ☜ (↼_↼) - step outside (touch grass) - take risks (no stonks) - get out of your head (dude) - produce - welcome feedback (thank u) - be vulnerable (emotionally) - embrace conflict (you're not a doormat) - don't play roomscape ಠ ͜ʖ ಠ - be optimistic :)
I really struggle with being optimistic, getting out of my head, being vulnerable and producing 😢 I hope I could get better because I really feel so terrible and is too stressed to do anything about it.
Number 1. The only thing that I want is to experience love and intimacy. But people say that it's not an attainable goal. But I know that it's the one thing that I want. People tell me that I should travel and do new things. They aren't wrong, but for example traveling alone just feels so empty especially when I see couples traveling together.
travel alone! bc when you get there, nobody knows you, which means nobody knows how you usually are…which means you can be whoever the f you want right now. spoiler alert, you’ll prob end up being the most ‘you’ you’ve ever been.
I am a final year student in highschool, I have college entrances coming within not even 40 days, I spent most of the time thinking i have so much time or i dont have any time and about people leaving me, life, future plans and so on... I didnt prepare much for the exams cuz i was busy overthinking and getting anxious, Thanks a ton for the help! I really needed some reality check. Ik its gonna be really really hard to catchup with people who are working since months, but everyone have their own limits, and i wont know unless i do it and find it out myself. Hope it goes well!
Step number might be to get rid of the abusive people in your life. If you are playing games constantly and hiding from life really look at the people around you. You may be the scapegoat.
I struggle most with taking risk, it can be talking to people or doing what I never did before. You make the videos for souls to nourish, i am one of them. Thank you so much. I will definitely pay you back one day as I am struggling currently ❤️
Made this video while I was on the road, so it's a bit more stripped down and conversational. Would love to hear your thoughts on some of this stuff. I felt strongly like I should give you guys the reverse perspective of the last video. But if you haven't checked out the previous video, I'd highly recommend. It's metal af: th-cam.com/video/ofdiMd3P5h4/w-d-xo.html
Also, how are you guys doing?
Job terminated me, but because I worked on my skills for the past 4 years, I already have another technical job sorted out. Thanks in part to your content
I really needed to hear this stuff today, and I liked the conversational aspect. Glad I clicked. Liked!
This video felt like I'm having a deep conversation with u and I think it's engaging and impactful especially in the context of this video
"move the mouse over to click the like button" then reasoning should at least in theory work wonders. You almost got me.
I'm doing very well thanks to all these nice videos of yours i've recently found about. I share them with my friends and apply your advise constantly. Thank you so much
Tried to summarise:
1. Have a goal.
Write in detail what you want your life to look like. Make your goals specific.
2. Step out of the cave.
Stop spending so much time inside doing monotonous things/spending time in front of screens. Step outside. Try and socialize.
3. Take risks.
Life is inherently risky. There are many things out of our control that cause pain. Might as well take the risks of trying something you actually want to do even if it involves failing, no? It is empowering to try. It's risky to *avoid* risk and just be comfortable.
4. Get out of your head.
Just start the thing before you can even think about it. Before you give yourself time to hesitate.
5. Produce.
Produce more than you consume. Creating more than consuming brings more excitement into your life. Like watching videos? Make one. Like looking at photographs? Take one.
6. Welcome feedback.
You do not know everything. Surround yourself with people who challenge you and hold you to a higher standard.
7. Be Vulnerable.
Don't be afraid to be emotionally vulnerable and honest to your inner circle. Find the courage to let people you trust in, let them see your flaws. Because these flaws would otherwise thrive in secrecy.
8. Embrace conflict.
If someone has wronged you, don't say that it's okay. It's not okay. If you say it's okay, it's likely that person might take advantage of you in the future. It also implies you don't respect yourself and your boundaries. Risk a little discomfort to increase your self respect.
9. Don't play Runescape lol
10. Be optimistic.
Life is hard, there's no shortage of obstacles, so why focus on the negative? You'd just be adding to them obstacles. Seek to find the good in all situations. Take a moment to think about what you're grateful for. Try to monitor your thoughts/be more mindful about the stories you tell yourself and recognise the tone. The last person who should be robbing you of encouragement is yourself.
Good luck guys :)
Number 9 was a life changer until I played Leauge of Legends...
11. Be curious
Dont play rune LMAO
Tnx for the summary
Excellent summary! Saved me 23 minutes I was about to rewatch the video lol
Chronic stomach pains can’t perform at 100% life is awful
3:39 "let people know your name"
I love when super simple, almost annoyingly obvious, statements contain within them so much.....wisdom? potential? power?
I don't know exactly the word, but that simple idea speaks so loudly to me.
And there's so much detail in that word "let".
It's not "make people know your name" it's not assertive advice, but just allow yourself to be part of society, allow yourself to speak, to be seen and partake in society.
SO much meat here!
The ones I struggle with the most are:
- Taking risks
- Getting out of my head
- Embracing conflict
- Being optimistic.
You really articulated why these are so important, which is extremely helpful. Thanks Joey! 🙂
Same dude i used to have these problems .
I gave the 100th like on this comment. 😅
for me it is living secretly, not opening up when needed and not getting out of my head
The getting out of my head thing is me to the max Its hard as an introvert and quiter person it's almost impossible not to do it.
@@KSHITIJTAMBOLI same
the fact that you put in so much effort just to help other people like this is truly incredible you are a great person mate
I’m an 18 year old first year university student. My essay is due tomorrow and I had a month to do it. But I had been over planning and overthinking how great it’ll be once I finally get down to doing it. Look at me now. Several hours before submission date. I resonate with every word that you’ve said. I over consume “productive” content and it doesn’t even help me. I watch all these videos to learn how to do my thing better yet never do it because I keep watching. So I’m really grateful for this! Thank you
Your current situation reminds me about an experiment conducted by scientists about which I read. It started out by the scientists taking various groups and individual students and gave them a project of capturing the perfect picture. The best one would win a grand prize. Majority of the groups waited for the best photo to capture and never captured any whereas 1 group decided on a different strategy. They would take picture of everything that they found to be photogenic. They ended clicking more than 200 photos and from that they selected the best one to submit. As you may have guessed, this group won the contest because they didn't wait for the perfect opportunity. They just took every opportunity and *tried* to make the best of it.
@@Thinkaboutit897 wow. You know what, this really applies to me. I always wait for the perfect time to carry out somethunh. Nyil the due date is there and flight or fight kicks in. I dont do my best but the minimum. Leaves me ashamed because I was planning perfection
@@missalsharki well now that you've identified the problem. Find the solution to it and apply it. Boom! Your problem is solved.
I'm also an 18 years old university student in a quite similar situatuion, 2022 has been a year with many ups and downs for me, sometimes I feel angry and tire after.
How did the essay go?
The part where you said about taking risks was mind blowing for me... I took a risk in the last year that I regret for, it was a mistake, but as you said, we can't avoid risks in life. We have to confront our conflicts and not run away from them, like you said. Thanks for this video.
They should teach these in school
No we must teach everyone about triangles 😎
Exactly
Exactly what I was thinking society would be so much better
In school they doesn't teach what you need. That's what it's bs
Sadly schools are not made to build people, they are made to build workers.
3:25 am, really needed this.I've been going through something with my girlfriend and this video popped up when I opened TH-cam
It makes me feel better knowing I’m not the only one going through these issues. I hope everyone here figures them out. At 26 I feel so old but need to realize It’s the perfect time to completely transform
And, of course, it's absolutely fine to start small, and to start over many times. Just keep on rolling
late 20s is the time to transform and at 26 you have a headstart!
It's never too late to start living! Limiting beliefs are just that, limiting you... i recommend you to read Limitless!
It's the perfect age to play runescape!
@@dubistschonaberdafurkannst9193 I was playing that in 2004 before I had hair on my nuts!
I like how concise and focused the advice and video is. No 10mn intro, no useless advice. 👍
sometimes when im stuck doing nothing productive, i tell myself to watch 1 video from betterideas which is relevant for me, and then start doing what im supposed to do. He really showed me some mistakes ive been making and i truly believe his videos are part of the reason why im getting less depressive episodes ❤️
It's the overthinking that I struggle with a lot personally. I feel like my life has literally become this sort of meta form of living where I'm constantly planning on things I want to change but then never doing any of them, feeling miserable as a result. I would love a whole video on tip number 4 alone tbh.
Same here.
Totally agree
I suggest reading the book Chatter from Ethan Ross. It explains the overthinking part of our inside voice and how to be conscious of this fact and use our internal thinking for the better.
The voice inside our head will never stop so why use it to do harm to yourself? This is a question for everyone including me.
If you have plans of reading i suggest this book as it explains in details why we have this chatter that can spiral into overthinking.
Shit, It's like you're describing me. Huge chaotic pile of thoughts in my head that I need to finally start doing this and that, change this and that, stop doing this thing and that thing... And the result is always the same. I fall into a stupor and procrastination and do nothing. As a result I hate myself for this so much that I start feeling hopeless
@@venom2381 Thank you for the suggestion! I will definitely be reading that.
Striking up conversations with strangers is one of the best motivators for me because I work at a grocery store and I love my job. It's like practice for customer service and it makes my capability for patience shoot through the roof
Every thing you hate about yourself is just a part that loves you and wants to protect you, even a self harming one just wants the physical pain to protect you from unbearable emotional pain and if you just took a time to listen to it and love it back, it might become your greatest gift.
What if you hate the world? What if you hate society, and people, and treachery and life itself? What if you hate everything for mistreating you? I apologise for complaining, I just see how wise you are, and hope to be taught by someone as compassionate and (seemingly) hopeful as you are
@@Blessed_V0id
This is exactly how I've felt for the longest time. Wow. Actually taken aback by how much this has described me to a tee.
What do we do if we feel this way?
@@punishedvenomsnake716 Survive. Be the hero that was never there for you. Make a better world, so that no one you meet has to feel the pain you have, unless they deserve it. Save your hate for evil, and help anything good grow strong. I believe in you
@@Blessed_V0id
Thanks a lot, Boss. I'll take your words to heart and I'm rooting for you too ❤💪
@@punishedvenomsnake716 Thanks man. Its hard to remember we good few arnt alone sometimes
Another banger of a video dude! Keep up the great work as always!
Wow, I have the same last name
...are you a new york resident?
This video was timely. I’ve been through a traumatic breakup recently and fallen into a rut. Moving, going outside, avoiding my phone, talking to people, working on my goals, these things have been helping me get through it 🖤
i feel so directionless. it gives me hope that other people feel the same way and that we are all actively looking for answers to combat it
I've been in a depressed rut for the past few weeks, so now that I know you read these comments I just wanna say thank you for your videos. They helped me a lot.
“Optimism is essential to achievement and it is also the foundation of courage and true progress.”
- Nicholas M. Butler
I know I’m a heavy pessimist, my friend pointed out to my last night when I was having a rough day. She told me I always look for the negatives in any situation. Ever since she said that it really changed my outlook. I do look at situations as a bad, horrible thing for my life instead of looking for a positive way around any bad situations. Thanks for making this video I really appreciate it! -Alex
Best of luck to you. Its not your fault your pessimistic, but you deserve better for you...plus it can lead to you loosing what little good things you have. Life isn't supposed to be so terrible, so try to enjoy it while you can friend
Fantastic that you arrived at this place! I was blessed years ago by a dear friend, with incredible advice that I took to heart and pursued. Things aren’t, ever perfect, but our outlook, our pursuits, matter above everything around us and what’s coming at us. I’ll give you this simple thing. Be consciously aware of the things you consume. The web, the media, everything that’s bombarding you, is typically as negative as it gets. Cease, and desist, don’t click on it. Pursue answers, pursue light. It’s tough, it’s not easy and from time to time you’ll fall off the train. Get back on, and continue.
If it works for you that’s great! And keep seeing the positive. Please just know that pessimism isn’t something that has to be fixed or changed.
@@freckles4603 This is a damn good point freckles. I’ll second that with a “tend to your garden”. Everyone is guilty of it, we all have opinions about others games. I’ve always stated to my kids and anyone else that’s listening, play YOUR game and if you are focussed there? You won’t have time to criticize others.
@@freckles4603 true, like pretty much everything else in life, a healthy balance of optimism and pessimism will make you wiser and stronger than most people
I like the path of least resistance. It’s my favorite path to take.
The part you said about taking risks and trying than being apathetic really spoke to me. You really called me out. I think I'm ready to make some big adjustments now. Thank you for this video💗
I’m sitting here listening to this man and crying for some reason. Thank you Saitima, the crying felt good
this honestly helped me get out of the depressive slump i'd been in for the past 2 weeks, i always thought that am not thinking things well enough but what i'd been lacking was the idea of shutting my overthinking & actually start studying rather than procrastinating my way through
I have always thought that I knew myself pretty well and was very self aware, but I needed this video to help me realize that I am still a work in progress and that is okay. The things that I struggle with are: being optimistic, being vulnerable & taking risks. After starting a full-time position in Big Four Accounting, I have seen changes in myself, how I treat others, how I view life, etc. I have spent the past year obsessing over trying to be good at what I do (
I still feel like I am clueless), but my overall happiness and well-being are invaluable and should not be sacrificed for a 9-5. I have avoided setting any personal goals for myself and have been living day by day, just rolling with the punches. I need a set concrete goals to achieve for myself and start doing things that make me happy. Thank you for this 😌
I don't know what happening with me... One minute I am happy and the next, I feel broken 💔
I’m sad I didn’t see this sooner but I’m glad I’m taking these steps towards a healthier life
"The satisfaction that we are longing for is the feeling of creation "
Quote of the day❤
Watched the AD for AG because you didn't crash the topic of the video by putting the AD in the middle. Thank you very much for that!
Thanks for this Joey.
Embracing conflict is one I've really struggled with, especially the last few years. It's so hard to tell people "no", and I try so hard not to argue with anyone. I honestly hate how much value I place on people's perception of me, but I feel trapped. Maybe my greatest fear is that if I speak up or put my foot down then I'll be shunned by the people closest to me. But in so doing I've started to despise the people closest to me. It probably doesn't help either that I'm fairly good at hiding my emotions.
So...yeah, needless to say I wanna work on this one.
Oh, also Overthinking & Being Vulnerable. Those one's too.
THANKS MAN, Don't have words for describing how your videos help me.
I appreciate how you're able to repackage the same message so many times with such patience. because it really is so simple on its face. go outside and live your life! but when you're stuck in old patterns, videos like this are such a good reminder. I should use that Inaction is a Slow Death hoodie as wall decor for a daily reminder lol.
I'm glad you touched on the gratitude journals on the last point, and would offer a counter-point: Start a journal where you write down upcoming tasks and current thoughts. It helps to stay organized, and keep a physical copy of your responsibilities. Your first point about goals is much easier to work towards when you have them written down and can reference them over time, instead of forgetting them months later. Also, seeing my current thoughts and looking back a week/month/year later helps myself see what I was actively doing to work towards my goals, and how it affected me overall to improve/maintain a healthy lifestyle for the future. Plus it helps to stay on task, such as when you have school projects coming up and can see how much time you've actually dedicated to them so far.
Glad to see this video pop up in my feed! Would be great to see new content dedicated to factors such as sleep and exercise, and how they're important to maintain these healthy changes.
Number 7 hit me hard, I was emotionally volnurable with a very good friend which then attacked me with my own traumas she knew about me and I felt betrayed for days, less for the words but more for the broken trust I had in her. Emotional volnurability is a weapon which can be used for healing or destruction so you need to think deep before giving it to someone.
I have been passing through a lot of "work on yourself"-videos, and a lot of them have been great, but you somehow struck a chord with me. I like the way you deliver things, and I like the fact that you repeat some fundamentals that simply need to be repeated. I feel like you cut through the BS and get to it. It's up to me now to make the changes that can better my life. I also love the fact that you adress the platform that provides you money; TH-cam, which is inherently addictive.
I always subconsciously click on your videos and enjoy how much effort you put in it. It's like being reminded of why I'm on this planet. Thank you so much for keeping up the hard work, so I (and many others) can do, too!
I’ve watched that particular “how to ruin your life” vid this summer and subscribed after that. For a long time i’ve been seeing your vids and left them “for later”. Lately i started noticing that my life is going downhill, i sunk in demotivation and procrastination - just like in that video… and i told myself that i would rebuild my routine, prepare for the exams and start working out. Today is that day. I was going to look up some tutorial on youtube and saw this fresh released vid. For me that really seems like a sign that it IS the right time and it truly boosted my motivation. Thank you all!
It’s funny how your last video had 1.7 million plus views and this one has about 300k views after two weeks, considering these are the steps to get out of those “ruts” or “bad habits”. It’s like people don’t want to get out of those. Like Alejandro Jodorowsky says that we’re in this cage that we created ourselves. But the door is open and we say that we want to get out but we don’t and the door is completely open. Great video. I will be working on myself a lot more. Last one hit a cord and this one is like a light at the end of the tunnel… or an open door to my cage. Thank you.
I agree, I often watch these and fail after a bit. I think we just need to accept it's going to suck, we need to stop being easy on ourselves and bailing out at the first encounter of uncomfortably
"Melancholy. The ache of doubt that stiffens to paralysis. Paralysis that breeds despair.
This was once a place of refuge for you. But it has become a prison, a prison you constructed to protect yourself. From pain. From risk. From life itself. You are the architect."
@@HiiImChris I use this mantra when I sense that I'm slipping: "Your mind is fighting itself. It remembers the pain of life. It's trying to protect you from it. Keep going."
I realised that doing things i hate for enough time makes me build a habit, this habit might be healthy but its still annoying to do. I still do it like taking cold showers everyday, i always feel obligated to take this shower but now i just kinda do it. SOmetimes i struggle sometimes its just getting over with it. From 7 months ago when i started, it felt awful and i couldnt do it 3 days a streak. But i forced myself to consistently go through it. This made me more familier with, discomfort and so i dared to do harder things to challenge myself. I now go to the Gym and i still mostly feel like shit. But these 7 months have improved me so so so much and i learned so much. I started getting professional help and i found that i had some diagnosis like ADD and perhaps Aspergers. Life is still tough but, i feel like the hard part is being uncomfortable, but when you are uncomfortable enough you ultimately feel better and better about it.
I dont know what anyone is going through, i know that i went through hell. I didn't get help from God it was either me laying in my bed for days and never feeling good or me showing up to challenges and beating them 1 after 1. I was severe depressed, atleast thats what i was diagnosed with. You aren't obligated to become better, we love you the way you are. The question you need to awnser is, do you want a better life? if yes then take it ^^
The taking risk of talking to people randomly really spoke to me. I have social anxiety, I just gotta not give a shit about what people think of me, and not worry about how to talk with people. Just do it, what can go wrong!
Stepping out into the world is my favorite point. It’s probably the most powerful way here to get out of a rut, to just go out, talk to anyone, admire nature, observe, breathe and let it all go. This is probably the most effective way for me. 💯💪🏼
Hands down one of the best videos ive ever watched.
I just love the kind of advice you give. I have this friend who is really lost in life. Wish he would hear and take these lessons to heart, but I've tried twice and I think he actively avoids this kind of content. People need to get that they are the only force capable of changing their lives. Otherwise there's nothing to be said or done.
I couldn't have heard this at a better time. Over the last year I worked myself out of the worst mental health I've ever had. Anxiety and depression along with feeling like your life is going nowhere is a tough one, topped off by your long term relationship ending badly. I'm not a better, healthier person than I've been in the last 5 years but I've reached a point where I don't know what to do next, and this video has outlined that perfectly. It's time to move onto the next stage. First the goal was getting back to a healthy place, next it's time to blossom into the world.
thank you so much for doing this video. the last one hit really hard, but i couldn’t really find strength in myself to figure out how to un-ruin my life. i’m sure this one will help, thank you
Your videos have brought most change to my life, because they are simple and straight to the point. Also bring out the super obvious things that my oblivious self just looked past lol
Don't call yourself oblivious
As the italian comedic actor Roberto Benigni said "starting a new path scares us, but after our first steps we realize how dangerous staying still was"
I’m an introvert and I have started doing virtual tours in London. I’m feeling more productive. Every time o get a view and a subscriber, it’s party time! It’s these little things that are keeping me going. I’m getting the internal fulfilment. It’s very encouraging.
im 13, i was sedentary, extremely undisciplined and extremely sedentary, YOU are making me change my life. i hope that next year i become better and better on pursuing my dreams...❤💪
I be watching these after breakups that totally break me mentally and physically. Thank You Man. It helps me pick up the pieces of myself and try to be content with my own reflection instead of hating who I am. You only live once. Taking care and loving yourself is def one of the most important things u can do.
Step 3 really hit home. For years, I’ve been avoiding things whether it be because I’m scared or because of social interaction. Nowadays it’s talking to a girl I like. I’ve been putting it off for months because I’m scared of her rejecting me. But once Monday comes I’m going to walk in her office and strike up a conversation with her. I had the idea of making a little something ahead of time so it gives me a clear reason to talk to her and not just go in not knowing what to talk about. But my goal from now until next year today is to take more risks
Im a 15 y/o student in 11th grade and I had two weeks of holiday to do a video, read two books, make an oral presentation, do 4 text analysis, revise maths and physics, do geography exercises, prepare for an English essay and revise for a French test. I did nothing cuz I overthought too much about it and now I have Saturday and Sunday to do all that I feel super stressed and overwhelmed but in the end is all my fault cuz I procrastinated too much for nothing. Thanks to you now I’ll start do my homeworks earlier and with more efficiency
I don't know if you're a religious person but I really appreciated the comment you made about the confession, also the fact of exposing your dark side verbally makes it clearer to yourself and allows you to fight it in the best way! Thanks for everything you do
Every video from this guy is absolute top tier stuff
I’ve been in a rough headspace lately, but these videos are always so great in keeping myself grounded. Thank you man and keep it up.
Thank you so much for this channel. So refreshing to discover personal development content that is actually honest, sourced and deontologic, and doesn't just resolve around an endless cycle of "you must be better in order to be better" self-depreciation bullsh**. I'm gonna struggle a lot especially with the "stop isolating" part but hey at least I'm on the path. Keep it up man
whoever searched this up, I hope things get better. I’m sorry.
I didn't search, I was fed it .
It's not your fault. Thank you 🙏🏾
🙏🫂
Talking about life throwing you challenges - I dropped out of 3 degrees, at 3 different universities for a different reason each time. But mostly because I wasn't sure what I was doing with it and well was I enjoying it? Social side but not the course, and even that went down hill by the 3rd uni.
Thank you so much for making this video! It's so relatable and thought-provoking.
The one thing that stuck with me was the "empowering rejection." I am keeping this newly found phrase to look at failure and rejection from a different angle.
I start understanding these things only after making all of this in my life and taking the great amount of suffering. This video found me in right time.
Keep in mind that having goals doesn't just mean long term. It is important to balance between long and mid to short term, because if you pile on all these huge goals, it makes it really hard to make day to day changes. Make sure to appreciate the small accomplishments you make everyday.
Thank you for this. I really needed this
As always you are very inspiring.
Tonight I am feeling the need to recover from a period of apathy, anxiety and low motivation. I am about to go to bed but tomorrow I will put more effort into putting these tips into practice. Thank you very much.
I deeply appreciate that you demonstrated optimism while the motorbike drove by many times.
Actually made me put the label of pessimism to my driving mind.
Your videos have been so helpful for me. I'm one of those people who can never focus on anything, I'm always procrastinating and daydreaming. But binge-watching your videos has helped me see that there is so much that I can become. I actually got up to go to the gym today. Insane!
And also, you're utterly hilarious. You remind me of myself but better.
I think my main struggle is with the first one. It’s pretty rough to have a problem like this when I’m a college freshman. I have no idea what to major in. I get so many suggestions but I really have no idea what I want. It’s the amount of possibilities that I feel are overwhelming. I definitely think I could get out some more as well. I think that risk is something I got to get over still. I think I’m getting better at not overthinking. I really enjoy consuming media but I do think that I should try to start to make things. I don’t know what I’m going to make, but probably TH-cam. I think I’ve been getting better at listening to other’s perspectives. I think I’ve been taking criticism a lot better recently. If someone complains about the way I do something, I always ask what I did wrong and what I can do better. My belief is that feedback is the most important resource. I am ashamed of some things I do, like over eating. I think I could definitely work up to purging my bad habits with help from friends. I don’t think anybody’s been a dick to me recently. I definitely have tried to mellow out over the years but I will never let someone just get away with being a dick. I do think I’m getting better at being optimistic. I’ve never really had a problem with this. What about all of you guys?
1:31 I cracked it. He's the human representation of the iconic runescape bot! Lol but in all seriousness, thanks for these videos. I feel an incremental shift in my mental trajectory after watching these
although i completely understand where others are coming from.. i decided to realize after watching the other video that it really was on me and sitting there and sulking about my life wasn't going to do anything. before jumping into goals and future plans, i decided to go on a health journey first. mentally and physically. it's been pretty rough, but there has been some changes as well. It has definitely crossed my mind where I've felt exactly the same as others and blamed people for being insensitive and such, but that didn't do anything for me. I was just focusing over and over again how no one cares or they're so quick to judge. it doesn't matter though. they will do what they do no matter how you're doing. so use everyone's judgements and negative actions into tools for yourself. Being so broken and then healing will only make us better people because we will be more balanced to know how it feels for both ends. We can be better than anyone else that hasn't been through all that life has to offer, whether it be depression or miracles. Let's go!
Two quotes that have gotten me through some tough times in my life:
“The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way” - Marcus Aurelius.
“It is better to conquer grief then to deceive it” - Seneca
Keep pushing through the fog, and eventually you’ll make it to your destination. Stay safe friends.
Thank God you have a follow up video. I would've driven myself mad with despair from relating to the last video so hard but here you essentially say the same things but on the opposite side of the respective spectrum. This is life saving advice and I'm going to try my hardest to follow these steps.
On #1, ive tried multiple time to look at what I want my life to look like. However, it always makes me depressed because I feel like I need to have a path I want to take (because of video/ social media constantly telling me I need to have one) but I cant find things I want to personnaly achieve. Most of the things people point to (gf, money, bigger muscle) to me are all external stuff and does not motivate me.
Phone won’t let me edit but I would like to hear others opinion on this and recommandation/ if they have similar experience. Maybe someone will say something that will change my mind/ make me reflect.
I want to say thank you. Today was an absolute shit day, I felt like I was in a pit of despair. But then after so many hours into the day, I remembered. “Don’t think, just do” I remembered how you explained to not think so much into the littlest things. So then realized, nothing was going to change if I don’t act upon it. So slowly but surely I started to do small things to make my day more meaningful. Things I thought about too hard on. I feel that if I didn’t watch this video I wouldn’t have been able to go through this day. So thank you. Really. I really hope I stick to this advice the rest of my life.
You're honestly such an inspiration brother. ❤️
This video has lead me to understand what is going on with me. My life has made a huge shift in the past 10 years. I haven't taken the time to sit and figure out what direction I'm going in now. What steps I need to take to redo my life. Instead I was feeling that now I am failing at things I had wanted to do in my life. Well, I didn't "fail", it's just time to figure out a new plan. So thanks for giving some direction on how to figure out what's NEXT
I struggle the most with regret over not taking risks out of fear of failure and instead listening to other peoples opinions as to how I should run my life.
Hello first of all I want to thank you for being strong and be leting others know they are not alone.. I’m 24, dropped out of uni after having bad time management on a foreign country… it sucks wish I had a goal something to love to do
You will find it man
You know this is the one video that literally saved me years of my life because I am damn sure that you learn these lessons in your life by getting hit by challenges but these lessons gave me the awareness I needed to fight against some of the challenges in life.
About "producing more than consuming" makes total sense... If we watch TikTok videos, TH-cam shorts on a great part of the day we don't feel good in the end of the day....
But if we produce more than consuming, in the end of the day, we feel like "mission accomplished", with a great feel and proud.
This was extremely helpful. It's been three months since I've started feeling lonely and slowly sadder, but this video managed to shine a ray of light on my situations (sounds exaggerated, but it is not)
I really appreciate your videos because I think they can be applied to almost anyone’s life. And at any stage of life I feel like it’s something I need to hear.
I think I struggle the most with optimism, because although rarely I’m unrealistically positive, it’s always been part of my personality to have a cynical, dry sense of humor. I would say it’s really annoying to have at least one person a day tell me I should be more optimistic. I’m trying to even it out more, I swear! Thanks for the reminder!
It's okay to be this way! It has literally to do with our genetics if we're rather pessimistic or rather optimistic. You don't have to fake your personailty. I personally think it's important that there are people that are more pessimistic than others, because they see things from a different angle, and lots of times we need to have different views to create a good solution.
Ofcourse having a gratitude journal and looking on the bright side of life from time to time is beneficial for everyone. 🦛
started a journal thanks to you. I'm hoping it'll help me work, keep organized, and stuff...
1.Have a goal and aim for it
2.Step out of the cave
3.Take risks
4.Get out of your heard
5.Produce more than you consume
6.Welcome feedback
7.Be vulnerable
8.Embrace conflict
9.No videogames
10.Optimism
Rule #9 is a No from me.
9. No Runescape
@@bobobsen I thought this one was a very particular one so I decided to make it more generic, but you are right!
#10 is a nope.
Thanks man
Thank you so much. My son is in a very bad place and it's so devastating to see. I send him your videos, and pray to the gods, that he watches them. As a mom, it's so heartbreaking.
The previous video was AMAZING! It put everything into amazing perspective! It was my favorite work of yours yet.
It was SO important that I hear all those ways I've been hurting myself during what I'm going through in recent years.. The ways in which i' ve been ruining my life.
I love this breakdown as well. Thank you so much for all of the time and work you put into your videos.
13:56 totally me Joe.. I'm back to this masterpiece probably the dozenth time.. everytime I discover a new aspect of understanding it..
Hi, I usually never comment on videos but I have been loving your videos and they help me so much as I’m going through some difficult times. I come from a place full of anxiety and feeling bad about myself and your videos teach me how to take care of myself. As much as I love your videos, I also have anxiety deciding if I’m gonna click on them because the titels often have negative vibe around them, using the words ‘ruining your life’, ‘stop doing …’, etc. Maybe the titels are just confronting me with myself, but i do think the bad vibes of the titels don’t match the good vibes of the actual videos themselves. I just wanted to give you this feedback. Thank you for all that you do and I hope to continue to learn and grow from your content.
Totally get it. It's always a tough balance, because due to negativity bias (a legitimate psychological phenomenon), people are far more likely to click on titles that tell them to stop doing a bad thing, rather than to start doing a good one. So if the content of the video itself is encouraging, but nobody watches the video, then nobody is encouraged. On the other hand, I typically like to spread out the negative titles a bit more, and the negative titles have been a bit more common recently, so expect happier titles for a while going forward :)
Oh wow the thinking thing really hit me hard. I always weasel myself out of things i know i should do or want to do.
Sort of stream of conscious here but, it's so disappointing watching all of these videos and never applying the advice consistently. But what you've said about producing more than consuming is kinda what I needed to hear. No matter how many self improvement videos I watch, they'll never bring any real value into my life if I don't just start doing the shit I so desperately want to do. Anyways I appreciate your videos a lot and this one was beautifully shot and edited too, always love the color grade! Thanks Joey
You're not alone in that struggle. Go easy on yourself. Applying this advice is hard, and the fact you're seeking videos like this one out means you're on the right path.
Part of why it's hard is the sheer volume of advice. Pick the one item that most resonates and focus on that above everything else. For me, exercise is a foundational habit. For you it might be working on a particular project. Don't try to change everything all at once
@@TheBswan You're right, trying to do everything all at once is where it usually gets difficult. Focusing on one thing at a time is doable. Thank you and all the luck to you on your own process, bless you:))
That's the first video that useful, constructive, brilliant, I see about this subject. Thank you. (Btw I'm french)
*a tribute to those with my attention span*
_(note: joey explains it way better)_
- have a goal ☜ (↼_↼)
- step outside (touch grass)
- take risks (no stonks)
- get out of your head (dude)
- produce
- welcome feedback (thank u)
- be vulnerable (emotionally)
- embrace conflict (you're not a doormat)
- don't play roomscape ಠ ͜ʖ ಠ
- be optimistic :)
Ty Mr. Time Saver
I really struggle with being optimistic, getting out of my head, being vulnerable and producing 😢 I hope I could get better because I really feel so terrible and is too stressed to do anything about it.
My biggest one is definitely consuming more than I create. I want to ditch my phone so bad
Man, you make so much sense to me and I can see myself changing for the better and improving my life. Thank you and God bless!
Number 1. The only thing that I want is to experience love and intimacy. But people say that it's not an attainable goal. But I know that it's the one thing that I want. People tell me that I should travel and do new things. They aren't wrong, but for example traveling alone just feels so empty especially when I see couples traveling together.
traveling alone was the best choice i ever made. you have to learn to be happy alone first then possibly find someone else along the way.
travel alone! bc when you get there, nobody knows you, which means nobody knows how you usually are…which means you can be whoever the f you want right now.
spoiler alert, you’ll prob end up being the most ‘you’ you’ve ever been.
I am a final year student in highschool, I have college entrances coming within not even 40 days, I spent most of the time thinking i have so much time or i dont have any time and about people leaving me, life, future plans and so on... I didnt prepare much for the exams cuz i was busy overthinking and getting anxious, Thanks a ton for the help! I really needed some reality check.
Ik its gonna be really really hard to catchup with people who are working since months, but everyone have their own limits, and i wont know unless i do it and find it out myself. Hope it goes well!
Step number might be to get rid of the abusive people in your life. If you are playing games constantly and hiding from life really look at the people around you. You may be the scapegoat.
That was my number ONE achievement. It was an essential for me. ✌️✌️
I struggle most with taking risk, it can be talking to people or doing what I never did before.
You make the videos for souls to nourish, i am one of them. Thank you so much. I will definitely pay you back one day as I am struggling currently ❤️
Thank you for giving hope to people like me who struggle a lot on this earth, had a lot of realizations.