Why Are Men (Over 40) So Self-Centered & Emotionally Unavailable?
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 21 ส.ค. 2023
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I’m finding out that when I ask a guy what does relationship looks like to him they don’t respond back and I’m OK with that because that’s an easy way of weeding out the knuckleheads
👍 Right, it scares them off. Same with the committment questions.
My man is 61 and I am 62. He decided to be emotionally motivated to get involved with me after being single for over 6 years. He is still learning how to be emotional and share with me. He is willing to learn and he has a great heart!
So many men don't understand or believe in childhood trauma. One guy I mentioned this to on a date literally laughed when I told him he was most definitely traumatized as a little boy. He replied back well I had a most perfect childhood. No self awareness. A very narcissistic response.
Why call it a narcissistic response?
@@JonathonAslayForMen because he said he a perfect childhood with NO trauma. Yeah, right Is he kidding? He was so self absorbed, judgmental of others and OCD...he thought he was perfect. This is a narcissist!
ALL men say this and they would respond this way if asked! Ugh.. I'm glad I"m done with men forever. @@jenniferl1908
Dr Stan Tatkin mentioned that avoidants claim to have a perfect or idyllic childhood.
It is really disappointing ! Most men in my generation who are over 40 they are acting immature and seek lust and sex . You are right , they are self centered and are selfish . My boy friend who broke up with me couple times because he claimed he is unsettled and just got divorced , he still wants sex with me . I am a woman with morals and I have never ever wanted to have sex before I know he would commit . Now I am stuck in this situation because I just can’t sleep with another man .
I honestly feel your pain, but you’re not stuck. You just made a stuck decision.. who said you have to sleep with a man. Take some time and find you. You just might love her
For your own heart's sake, I think you're wise to be wary of physical intimacy until he's healed.
@@livelearnandgrow5422Right- she made the decision to be/sleep with him - she can make the decision to move on. There’s nothing holding her there- certainly not him… he’s still looking for someone & she’s already stopped looking for someone that wants to be with her .. why do we do that? Self limiting behaviors.
You’re not his person..
the least of your problems is worrying about sleeping with other people in the future or raising your body count.
Doesn’t sound like You’re living within your own moral code + you’re unevenly yoked.
You aren't stuck, you are making a conscious choice...you are not a victim...
Men over 40 are seeking women under 30 for fun times. Commitment is not on their agenda. Fun, lustful times. They seek eye candy and the young ones seek their full wallets. Business arrangements not relationships!
Not true all the time. I had a BF over 40 when in my 20s and we were engaged and deeply in love and compatible. However he was emotionally unavailable in some ways :/
@@gahbrigoddess .... compatible yet emotionally unavailable sounds like an oxymoron and a recipe for disaster. Did you marry him?
@@cathyhinder8573 no we parted ways when I understood his behavioral patterns. The comment was a summary of a long term relationship. 👍🏾
Some people are just born evil. Has nothing to do with childhood. Oen adult behavior, stop blaming the childhood. Many horrific childhood dysfunctional children grow up to be outstanding adults. Choices, efforts, action.
I don't know if a child can be born evil...
Evil is taught at home. Children are born with love but their parents traumatize them with their own healed trauma. As they say, your healing is your own responsibility even if you had a horrific childhood.
@@jenniferl1908 that resonates with me
Dating is getting harder for women with morals , I don't sleep around but when I ask about serious issues they don't answer. Plans for the future? 😅they wanted to have sex sex sex 😒 lust is not enough
I think it's become a very sex obsessed and promiscuous society.
Be there, care about feelings, take care, TRUST!!
This is so helpful. I am 32 dating a guy who’s 42 and Divorced. It has been the hardest relationship I have been in, we both are trying so hard to make it work. We come from different worlds. Your channel has helped me understand guys like him. Thank you.😊
Glad it was helpful!
I've heard some young women complaining abt how there isn't chivalry anymore. But while listening to them I quickly realized how intimidating they are. I just felt they couldn't even see how it's their choices in men are their number one block in finding someone, bec they want to choose someone who looks right on the outside but then they want to turn them into something else they want, then they say they want independence & basically interview them like a future husband and then criticize the person for Not being the right kind of person they want, then they are upset the person doesn't want a second date. Ugh it wore me out listening to them. But also I see some ppl that want to fast track and secure what they want right away without treating the other person like a real person. But also I do feel our society has encouraged this fast track sleeping together etc. I just think u are right that most ppl approach dating from a completely selfish perspective. I just feel most women want to just expect other dates to read their minds and don't actually convey what they really want to other ppl
Good post share! Empathy is a learned decision. Yes Jefferey Dalmer had no emotionally avilable parental vision. So true ppl get effed up. Jonathan this is an Excellent Talk. Thank You.
May I say congratulations to both of you.....I wish you lots of happiness. I really enjoyed listening to your video because it hit home for me
25men ghosted,used,2raped,me in 11months,dating site men only want sex before they even meet,no relationship goals,im so discouraged, im 54
Mercy😢 I pray you heal from this🙏🏽 God bless you.
This is one of your best videos and discussions yet. Great job!
Glad you think so!
No, they are self-confident and emotionally more mature. You just perceive it wrongly. But keep trying, it is nice that you are trying.
Love that last chart!!!! Thank you🙏❤️
So glad!
Thanks!
WOW, thank you 😊
Awesome and interesting, Jonathon ❤️
The Silver Platter Treatment= Resentment - Natalie Clarice podcast
Interesting!
is that a Dexter bobblehead behind you? I can only see it partially but I have one and it looks like it is! I Always enjoy your videos. Very glad to see you doing so well.
Yes, my boys gave to me for Father's Day 😁
Cause we been there done that..
Mashaaaaalah tabaarakalah.
Which is soooooo differents and unuques. Familiessssss systems. Familyyyyy.yEyE
Can you talk about when one spouse pass away, how long before you start dating.
Yes, I will...
Nono.
It's not Jonathan's account
These are older videos
Did you and Marie get back together?
These are older videos...
@JonathonAslayClips I'm sorry Jon
@@kaitlynfoxpatreon thanks
This isn't the real account is it
Yes, it's mine...
I Honestly believe that most men are just not aware of the importance of Self Love, Spiritual, Healing ❤️🩹 and Personal Development Work, not Conscious! Ignorance of the importance of CREATING what we want, being Vulnerable, Authentic, Transparent and OPEN to change.