What Being Single at 37 Feels Like - Andy Haynes - Stand-Up Featuring

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 1 ม.ค. 2025

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  • @susans654
    @susans654 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5505

    "Dating at this age is like being in a town that evacuated and I was in the bathroom. " I didn't know if I should laugh or cry.

    • @pleaseforgivemyinsanity2801
      @pleaseforgivemyinsanity2801 5 ปีที่แล้ว +64

      It's really gross that people date at all. Dating = breeding = suffering followed by death.
      Zero people = zero problems = stop breeding
      The thing most celebrated as the thing that makes us human...having a family...is literally the root cause of every bad thing lol...
      It takes a real scum bag to date - and an even bigger one to breed.

    • @pleaseforgivemyinsanity2801
      @pleaseforgivemyinsanity2801 5 ปีที่แล้ว +43

      @Jacob Ben Afia
      Those who are born will suffer and die.
      Those who were never born - will never be bothered by anything.
      Facts are facts

    • @pleaseforgivemyinsanity2801
      @pleaseforgivemyinsanity2801 5 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      @Jacob Ben Afia
      It's known as the truth...
      Putting a lable on the truth and calling it a "position" makes it sound like an opinion...
      That's dishonest.
      I refer to myself as a human - not an "antinatalist"
      I am just a human - one of the few who speak truth.
      My only position is honesty.

    • @Lollita23
      @Lollita23 5 ปีที่แล้ว +22

      @Jacob Ben Afia I never knew that was a thing. I'm single and childfree because it just seemed easier. Although hope to fall in love again.

    • @pleaseforgivemyinsanity2801
      @pleaseforgivemyinsanity2801 5 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      ...
      Go and volunteer at a nursing home and spend the last 48 hours of someones life with them. Do it a few times - not just once - so that you get a better idea of the variety of tortures that await us. Keep in mind that dying at an old folks home is the BEST case scenario lol...
      As they are dying - don't walk away. Do not avert your eyes from THEIR eyes. Keep a fixed gaze and recognize what you are seeing is your own future and your own fate.... Then visualize the faces of YOUR OWN CHILDREN on the faces of these dying strangers...then at last...remind yourself that they will feel this pain....this fear....this agony - because you chose for them to.
      Dying is not as peaceful as most humans are brainwashed into believing...
      Go and see it for yourself. And don't leave the room to "get some air" ....don't be a coward...stay and watch it closely. Look onto their eyes deeply and FEEL what they feel as closely as possible...
      - Then recognize that WE are the harbingers of doom...
      ...

  • @julianhyde1645
    @julianhyde1645 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1294

    Comedy is golden when you can laugh and somehow walk away even more depressed than you were before.

    • @steelcannibal
      @steelcannibal 4 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      I'm 34, and this hit me like a Mack truck!

    • @moes_film
      @moes_film 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @bangmeister2012 try not to over analyze or overthink it. get the laugh then get out. also, you can most of the time tell what type of set the comedian is having with the first couple of jokes, so when it starts going to that rabbit hole just click out.

  • @androssteague
    @androssteague 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6860

    He's delivering the jokes and they're funny, but I can hear his misery. I can almost feel it.

    • @uberhaxonova
      @uberhaxonova 5 ปีที่แล้ว +105

      Lmao I'm glad, or else you'd be a psychopath

    • @stickyone11
      @stickyone11 5 ปีที่แล้ว +251

      I think thats the point though....also there isnt 1 good comdedian that is happy lol promise you.

    • @mrdan523
      @mrdan523 5 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      Merkin 101 joe Rogan?

    • @johnmag202
      @johnmag202 5 ปีที่แล้ว +261

      Dan Potato keywords “good comedian”

    • @thebluethunderbunny2324
      @thebluethunderbunny2324 5 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      I actually do feel it.

  • @RantTherapist
    @RantTherapist 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1013

    His despair is palpable. Someone give him a hug or I will find him and give him one. Funny guy.

    • @nmpete3365
      @nmpete3365 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Rant Therapist ehhhh I feel like it’s just his role. Most comedians play off what people might assume

    • @blackbetty476
      @blackbetty476 4 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      he is getting re-married soon, he just got engaged.

    • @hettel_visual
      @hettel_visual 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@nmpete3365 exactly. It's his shtick

    • @TheMemoryPolice
      @TheMemoryPolice ปีที่แล้ว +4

      He's married with a baby now.

    • @RantTherapist
      @RantTherapist ปีที่แล้ว

      I will find him and hug him after his next divorce. Think positive.@@blackbetty476

  • @taketheredpill1452
    @taketheredpill1452 5 ปีที่แล้ว +584

    he's got some legitimate talent. I want to see more of him.

    • @carrrexx7190
      @carrrexx7190 5 ปีที่แล้ว +24

      Yes, a quiet dark akwardness. Keys to a successful career in comedy and acting.

  • @yesiam4791
    @yesiam4791 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1949

    The dog is homeless. I have a house....... We'd rather him stay here🤣🤣

    • @Germatti13489
      @Germatti13489 5 ปีที่แล้ว +23

      Yes I Am LOL. As a former animal shelter director... oh my goodness!

    • @jones9309
      @jones9309 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      He's talking to us like we can't speak English.

    • @margaritam.9118
      @margaritam.9118 5 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Dog: Yea man I think I can do better.

    • @terrycrews1760
      @terrycrews1760 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @Pernell13489 former director? What you do? They gave you the boot bc you can’t be trusted either?

    • @vincemaribel
      @vincemaribel 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      I thought he was gonna say they would rather put the dog down then letting him adopt it.

  • @alexanderthefourth4474
    @alexanderthefourth4474 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3421

    He low key looks like Julius Caesar

    • @DeadlyDeadlyBeees
      @DeadlyDeadlyBeees 5 ปีที่แล้ว +40

      Oh ma god he does!!

    • @moviedude22
      @moviedude22 5 ปีที่แล้ว +49

      haha I think he looks las if he could easily pass for Matthew McConaughey's slightly older, less famous, and after seeing his bit slightly less funny estranged brother. I didn't find his set to be more sobering than funny

    • @pearz420
      @pearz420 5 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Maybe a caricature, the real Caesar had a very wide head.

    • @FlamingZelda3
      @FlamingZelda3 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Like he said himself, he's not hot, he's handsome

    • @333anders6
      @333anders6 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@pearz420 and greek and shorter and darker

  • @blahber222
    @blahber222 5 ปีที่แล้ว +279

    “i’m undefeated” HAHAHAHA I CANNOT

    • @FlamingZelda3
      @FlamingZelda3 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      ...finish a sentence.
      There, I did it for you ;)

  • @kansasgoldilocks
    @kansasgoldilocks 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1235

    I noticed that things were getting pretty scary in the dating scene when I entered my 30s. I'm 37 now and don't even try anymore. My life is work, gym, dogs. When I really think about it, that's not so bad. LOL

    • @Fable1Guides
      @Fable1Guides 4 ปีที่แล้ว +67

      it really isnt. Dogs are life.

    • @toniclife1971
      @toniclife1971 4 ปีที่แล้ว +41

      Its actually really great. plenty of ME time.

    • @c8ake
      @c8ake 4 ปีที่แล้ว +36

      same...I dont really get why people would be upset by it.

    • @boot2themoon
      @boot2themoon 4 ปีที่แล้ว +87

      Crap I'm about to be 33 and haven't dated in like 4 years out of laziness and apathy.

    • @toniclife1971
      @toniclife1971 4 ปีที่แล้ว +83

      @@boot2themoon wait until after you're 35. You really will not give a crap then. My late 30's was an eye opener and I felt so free and lifted. Men shouldn't have to worry about finding a "partner"...let women do that. Sadly, these days men have been indoctrinated into this fantasy too, instead of living their lifes.

  • @johnjacobjingleheimerschmi2895
    @johnjacobjingleheimerschmi2895 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2150

    This was hilarious and also put the fear of God in me.

    • @MrNightpwner
      @MrNightpwner 5 ปีที่แล้ว +43

      I read this. Saw the video. Now I too am this.

    • @jennhoff03
      @jennhoff03 5 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      Oh my gosh! Your username is my username, too.

    • @torachan23
      @torachan23 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Then that means you are pathetic

    • @shoegazer5451
      @shoegazer5451 5 ปีที่แล้ว +32

      @@torachan23 shut up

    • @davidbouchard8963
      @davidbouchard8963 5 ปีที่แล้ว +95

      dude, getting older is exactly like that in a lot of ways. like, especially if you're not successful in your career, either. You see yourself headed to what your younger self thought was essentially the worst possible way to end up. But you find a great sense of humor in it and it turns out, it's really not that bad. That you for coming to my TED talk? idk

  • @midnightodellewest1999
    @midnightodellewest1999 4 ปีที่แล้ว +257

    This reminded me of a quote by Scott Cohen: "Don't you just hate that your requirements in a mate become stricter as you get older, and your good looks wane, making it harder to attract even the mediocre people you no longer find acceptable?"

    • @David-fw4ly
      @David-fw4ly 3 ปีที่แล้ว +16

      Unless you are a rich man. At 40 y/o I have an easier time dating 20 y/o women than when I was 20. Dating is so easy if you’re rich, like shooting fish in a barrel.

    • @swimfan752
      @swimfan752 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Damn that’s too real

    • @swimfan752
      @swimfan752 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@David-fw4ly 😂 you’re capping

    • @David-fw4ly
      @David-fw4ly 3 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@swimfan752 Thank you. I'm glad you took my reality for such a long shot you thought I was lying. You must be young, how old are you? Do you not believe that rich older men can attract young prettier women? Just level yourself up and you'd be surprised at how much easier it is when you are high value.

    • @elisam.o9391
      @elisam.o9391 3 ปีที่แล้ว +28

      @@David-fw4ly yeah but it’s not real, staying in your age range optimizes ur chances of finding real love. 20 year old women are just looking for money, fun, and attention. But kudos to you! Just keep rotating them as they age out 🤣 - a 26 yr old woman

  • @tylerhobbs7178
    @tylerhobbs7178 5 ปีที่แล้ว +281

    This is the most depressingly hilarious set I've seen and it had me rolling 😂😂😂

  • @jasonday139
    @jasonday139 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1781

    the years have not been kind to seth meyers.

  • @samcha9448
    @samcha9448 5 ปีที่แล้ว +701

    It’s not that all the good people are gone, it’s just that people’s true colors are more apparent with age.

    • @carrrexx7190
      @carrrexx7190 5 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      Yes indeed, that says a lot about my hermit like existence. 😃

    • @samcha9448
      @samcha9448 5 ปีที่แล้ว +29

      It’s always such a nice surprise to find genuinely caring and honest people. Fortunately, there are quite a few of them out there.

    • @Ciclopea2
      @Ciclopea2 5 ปีที่แล้ว +25

      @@samcha9448 they are outnumbered by narcissists claiming their souls.

    • @Flagrant_Violations
      @Flagrant_Violations 5 ปีที่แล้ว +34

      A lot of good, intelligent people aren’t exactly extroverts by nature regardless and some of the most intelligent due to the way they have to live their lives literally practically don’t date.

    • @DeadlyDeadlyBeees
      @DeadlyDeadlyBeees 5 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      Also though with age comes more life experience, which often means more baggage. People start to get worn out

  • @sinarch4025
    @sinarch4025 5 ปีที่แล้ว +61

    It was just getting better and better! Why did it end there???
    "You're a nice lady!" 😂

  • @GizmoMaltese
    @GizmoMaltese 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2196

    I'm remarried. That stretch after my divorce was awful. So many crazy women (and men I guess) out there. It's too much work. I have one bit of advice. Marry someone who is innately kind and generous.

    • @ladybluelotus
      @ladybluelotus 5 ปีที่แล้ว +165

      Exactly! That's the biggest factor. You can work with and get through the rest of life's challenges just a little easier with a kind spouse. But an a*hole makes everything more difficult.

    • @bismuthcrystal9658
      @bismuthcrystal9658 5 ปีที่แล้ว +285

      Where is the kind and generous humans warehouse please?

    • @sinbad9849
      @sinbad9849 5 ปีที่แล้ว +96

      Great advice. Key word here is "innately". Everyone can be kind, and everyone can be an asshole.

    • @mr.pritchard67
      @mr.pritchard67 5 ปีที่แล้ว +142

      Find someone who you can truly be yourself with. Someone you can be absolutely honest with and have unrivaled integrity. Hiding who you truly are leads to failure.

    • @wronggg
      @wronggg 5 ปีที่แล้ว +69

      I have a much better piece of advice: Only marry someone phenomenally wealthy.

  • @kggregorie
    @kggregorie 5 ปีที่แล้ว +173

    Haynes is wildly underrated, should be more famous

    • @Koudey
      @Koudey 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      kggregorie More famous than Hannibal Buress.

    • @woozie___
      @woozie___ 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@Koudey you right. Loved Hannibal initially but his comedy since he blew up has just seemed lazy. I saw Andy Haynes perform with Rory Scovel like 8-9 years ago and I thought they'd both be huge by now.

  • @humanbeing5396
    @humanbeing5396 5 ปีที่แล้ว +140

    I’m 36 and have been single for quite some time. I must say, I enjoy it. The peace and quiet is addicting.

    • @ericolivier1687
      @ericolivier1687 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Yeah same here.

    • @well.thy.one.
      @well.thy.one. 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      Human Being i miss it so much

    • @carrrexx7190
      @carrrexx7190 5 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      Yes, I've been divorced for almost 20 years and I have a diminished labido. It doesn't get any better than that! And now, for some reason, I have lots of money. 😃

    • @algum.cara1
      @algum.cara1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +10

      True. I like hanging out with me

    • @sojournerkarunatruth4406
      @sojournerkarunatruth4406 2 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      #peaceistheonlyhappiness

  • @swapnilkakoty8972
    @swapnilkakoty8972 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1462

    He's delivering like The Joker if he didn't have that laughing disorder.

    • @nikhilsharma-xy7kr
      @nikhilsharma-xy7kr 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Hahahahaha लवलि

    • @pineablesoda
      @pineablesoda 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @@nikhilsharma-xy7kr gay

    • @Mannydamon
      @Mannydamon 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@nikhilsharma-xy7kr You can give it to my mother; She will politely refuse the Asian bullshit.

    • @CallMeDockett
      @CallMeDockett ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@pineablesodayou play genshin impact 💀

    • @CallMeDockett
      @CallMeDockett ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@pineablesoda and three years ago called this guy guy because….. why?

  • @metalstorm7506
    @metalstorm7506 5 ปีที่แล้ว +47

    “You’re a nice lady”, and she dries! - this part killed me

  • @trevormajor1197
    @trevormajor1197 5 ปีที่แล้ว +84

    he had me at new opponents...😂😭

  • @lurchlogan
    @lurchlogan 5 ปีที่แล้ว +73

    This set speaks to me... I'm 37,I have 3 Male roommates & one of them cut my hair recently because I was broke. 😂😂
    Dating does get harder at this age and older but it's all good. I don't have any children, I've never been damaged... I mean married & I have zero felonies. So I have alot of time to spend on myself & make myself better & most importantly up my game!!
    💪😎👍

    • @Paul-pd9uw
      @Paul-pd9uw 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Fk me, I always thought it would get easier for guys in their late 30s.

    • @gamma21285
      @gamma21285 2 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@Paul-pd9uw I don't know why everyone always breaks a decade like 30s into. 30s are 30s no matter age you're in. 35 is an arbitrary landmark people like to use as some indicator of change. It's not.

    • @ahaley3292
      @ahaley3292 หลายเดือนก่อน +2

      By upping your game, do you mean that you're getting better at Fortnite?🎮

    • @TheKing-vb2bw
      @TheKing-vb2bw 22 วันที่ผ่านมา

      @@ahaley3292I’m a man and agree with this. If decent women don’t find the guy desirable then there’s something wrong with the guy. He’s just not interesting enough for him to date him yet he wants something desirable. Same with older women too. It’s a human delusion. This comedian is 37 and lives with 3 men. How is that supposed to “sell”? He’s exactly where he should be in life in terms of dating and anything “better” would be a blessing. Women are delusional in dating but men are just as bad for one reason or another.

  • @unclephill4764
    @unclephill4764 5 ปีที่แล้ว +134

    "Hes not a barber he just offered to do it"... my friends before I got a license lol

  • @sirnate9065
    @sirnate9065 5 ปีที่แล้ว +537

    This routine made me reinstall tinder. I have a new-found sense of urgency.

    • @thabesttheris
      @thabesttheris 4 ปีที่แล้ว +78

      Not the place buddy

    • @joalvarez6252
      @joalvarez6252 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      If you build it! They will come!

    • @Smullet90
      @Smullet90 4 ปีที่แล้ว +8

      It's been a month, have you found "the one" on tinder?

    • @boogiebw0y
      @boogiebw0y 4 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      Yeah this ain't it chief

    • @joalvarez6252
      @joalvarez6252 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

      I think I speak for all these swinging richards on this! Tinder is for quick hookups bro! Nothing serious! You may hit a 3.5! But with the right dim lights... she becomes a 5! Jus saying keep your standards low and the ladies will come! #porkfest!

  • @JoeCnNd
    @JoeCnNd 5 ปีที่แล้ว +743

    I just became 36 and single...
    I've been single but only recently became 36.

    • @OctoganicAngel
      @OctoganicAngel 5 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      I’m about to turn 36. High five bro.

    • @kibetronoh2376
      @kibetronoh2376 5 ปีที่แล้ว +12

      @@OctoganicAngel you and Joe should change other's relationship status.

    • @JoeCnNd
      @JoeCnNd 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I can tell you it's all down hill from there. I've been it a week so far so I'm pretty experienced.

    • @OctoganicAngel
      @OctoganicAngel 5 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      @@JoeCnNd Thanks for the heads up. I was gonna have a birthday party but maybe I'll just skip it and take up alcoholism right now.

    • @JoeCnNd
      @JoeCnNd 5 ปีที่แล้ว +11

      @@OctoganicAngel I have beer. You can join me if you can accept that i sit around in my underwear all day. Dont change me and i wont change you.

  • @Knoar
    @Knoar 5 ปีที่แล้ว +852

    That awkward cut to a female in the crowd after he talks about a mean lesbian

    • @carrrexx7190
      @carrrexx7190 5 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      Sterotypicaly random 😂

    • @aw2584
      @aw2584 5 ปีที่แล้ว +18

      Lmao literally just thought of the same key and peele skit

    • @ToM92MoT
      @ToM92MoT 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      @Jeff B Lol I thought about that sketch too

    • @googoomu22
      @googoomu22 5 ปีที่แล้ว +19

      and then the dark haired men when he mentioned "the jews"?!

    • @yoooyoyooo
      @yoooyoyooo 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I was listening to the clip the second time and right at the time he got that part I read your comment. Felt like it was my destiny as if I was at the right place at the right time.

  • @mandiebox7945
    @mandiebox7945 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    To be fair a lot of people have a miserable dating experience in their teens and 20s as well. Lots of people get divorced which is extremely painful and unpleasant in most cases. I am 37 (male) and I have never been married, don't have kids, and sure I get lonely a lot, but I've always said it's better to be alone than to be with someone that hurts you or you just don't vibe with. Life on this planet can be extremely lonely, at whatever age there is out there.

  • @tykeishecaldcleught6105
    @tykeishecaldcleught6105 5 ปีที่แล้ว +810

    Wish they would have showed the entire stand up. Just kept getting funnier and funnier. Audience was whack though.

    • @haroldasraz
      @haroldasraz 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      It really did

    • @rasarmusic1
      @rasarmusic1 5 ปีที่แล้ว +30

      Audience was fine. I don’t laugh out loud much even when something is hilarious, so they were cool to me.
      Agreed that it got better.
      There’s other clips.

    • @preddyshite6342
      @preddyshite6342 5 ปีที่แล้ว +32

      Audience member gets heart attack laughing
      Comments section: What a whack audience, nobody died

    • @nepadron
      @nepadron 5 ปีที่แล้ว +35

      @@PolarisAb You really overthink these short clips.

    • @IncredibleIceCastle
      @IncredibleIceCastle 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      PIZZA shooters shoot

  • @gerryo25
    @gerryo25 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1047

    Sorry I'm in my mid thirties and old enough to see how miserable a lot of married people are. Just imagine being stuck in an unhappy marriage. I'll take being single ANY day.

    • @algum.cara1
      @algum.cara1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +73

      Single 4 life crew rise up

    • @2126Eliza
      @2126Eliza 4 ปีที่แล้ว +91

      rockn roll They're afraid of ending up like this guy. But I've been unhappily married. It's definitely worse

    • @pea6
      @pea6 4 ปีที่แล้ว +21

      That would suck.
      My first marriage was like that.
      Twelve years sober.

    • @Parialated
      @Parialated 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Not any day...
      Most days yes, not any day though...
      Its hard

    • @jumb0shr1mp6
      @jumb0shr1mp6 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Yea I'd rather be single .

  • @Venaigrette
    @Venaigrette 5 ปีที่แล้ว +193

    I feel like this man wakes up in the morning angrier than me

  • @nickymatrixx
    @nickymatrixx 5 ปีที่แล้ว +319

    Half expected him to start the set with “Alright Alright Alright”.

    • @carrrexx7190
      @carrrexx7190 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      Fredo McConaughey

    • @jap7384
      @jap7384 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      be a lot cooler if he did

    • @shydobaankween
      @shydobaankween 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Lol ok!

  • @tarekwayne9193
    @tarekwayne9193 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    One of the funniest stand ups I've ever seen.
    Furthermore, I'm older than this guy, single and loving it...
    Been this way for some years now...
    I feel for him though because it seems like he's genuine😂

  • @PACIFICBboy
    @PACIFICBboy 5 ปีที่แล้ว +280

    This guy is me in 8 years. This is my future.

    • @troytullis513
      @troytullis513 5 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      I hope you find the right person good luck on your journey.

    • @yoooyoyooo
      @yoooyoyooo 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Yeah we could all be him he didn't leave the address of the shelter that didn't give him the dog.

    • @DoctorSess
      @DoctorSess 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      M. Lewis I only have six left...

    • @Bulzack-wr1ii
      @Bulzack-wr1ii 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      TH-cam AMS he's advice will change your life

    • @millsykooksy4863
      @millsykooksy4863 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Lol

  • @mividasandoval2413
    @mividasandoval2413 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    .... "She was really really mean to me"
    Hands down my favorite part 😂😂

  • @msthang5366
    @msthang5366 5 ปีที่แล้ว +257

    “Fucks like a Christian quarterback”!!😓🤣🤣

    • @lindaclark5911
      @lindaclark5911 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Felicia Kelley comes quickly standing. No f😍🌽🍒🍑s given. Hj's&bj's. Keep running db.

  • @clavididk1236
    @clavididk1236 5 ปีที่แล้ว +804

    I'm 25 and single haha I can't wait to be alone the rest of my life 🤙🏻

    • @miscellaneousmedia3753
      @miscellaneousmedia3753 5 ปีที่แล้ว +114

      Same I'm 21, at some point you start to accept it, like "yes, this is my life now"

    • @clavididk1236
      @clavididk1236 5 ปีที่แล้ว +83

      @@miscellaneousmedia3753 yea I'm not meeting any chicks sitting on my couch all day. But it's what I do and I like to do it. And I like to be alone. I creep chicks out 😂

    • @Koudey
      @Koudey 5 ปีที่แล้ว +13

      Sagnik Mukherjee Just told myself this last night.

    • @raramcgee4982
      @raramcgee4982 5 ปีที่แล้ว +20

      Same 25 and divorced. Been with several girls sence even dated one for a year... You will find it buddy.

    • @jasperrester2264
      @jasperrester2264 5 ปีที่แล้ว +30

      28 yo over here

  • @Dankbanana1
    @Dankbanana1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +169

    Why is youtube all of a sudden recommending me comedians that are actually funny?
    Must be coz I'm 27 and single...

    • @JhonnyBoi
      @JhonnyBoi 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      - Banana - lmao same 😪

    • @8xnnr
      @8xnnr 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I'm 27 too and this guy randomly appears

    • @conorm2524
      @conorm2524 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      The algorithm must include comments I've written now. I should stop commenting.

    • @jasonlove1380
      @jasonlove1380 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Even if you find yourself being 30 and still single. I highly recommend you continue to date women in the sweet spot. 23-27. Dating in your 20’s is already a nightmare, but It’s a walk in the park to compared to Dating in your 30’s.

    • @MoonAlongMyHead
      @MoonAlongMyHead 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Seems pretty rough out there, maybe TH-cam it’s trying to prepare you for the imminent o.o Go out and date now Banana 🍌!

  • @thecooljohn100
    @thecooljohn100 5 ปีที่แล้ว +34

    Man, this guy's FUNNY. Gave me a few good laughs and idk know his name! Hope he does more stuff, I'll totally watch

    • @gbird5000
      @gbird5000 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      John Nazario Andy Haynes is his name

    • @nepadron
      @nepadron 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      HIS NAME IS IN THE TITLE

    • @jamesmcinnis208
      @jamesmcinnis208 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@nepadron that was too much work for John

  • @kbee8517
    @kbee8517 2 ปีที่แล้ว +19

    As someone in their mid twenties, I’ve never been so terrified in my life

  • @VMfilm329
    @VMfilm329 4 ปีที่แล้ว +34

    This dude is seriously funny! He has actual jokes and punchlines

  • @MarketResearchReading114
    @MarketResearchReading114 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    He's really uttering his soul out there, and its a soft humor. I find that its full of depth, but its not hitting me in the gut... its too close to reality that I'm too familiar with where its coming from. It doesn't make me smile, it doesn't make me even slightly move my lips up in a grin, but it does make my eyes feel warmth. I hope Andy is doing well now 3 years later.

  • @manuginobilisbaldspot424
    @manuginobilisbaldspot424 5 ปีที่แล้ว +49

    I'm 40 and never been married. Relatable AF.

    • @blaydes4612
      @blaydes4612 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Its the bald spot

  • @Trazynn
    @Trazynn 5 ปีที่แล้ว +157

    More of this guy, whoever he is.

    • @nepadron
      @nepadron 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      his name is in the title! are people blind, or just illiterate?

    • @AnotherComputer
      @AnotherComputer 5 ปีที่แล้ว +6

      @@zombiemachinery4868 I bet you're Australian.

    • @zombiemachinery4868
      @zombiemachinery4868 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      @@AnotherComputer LOL! Nope.

    • @glennbarrera8353
      @glennbarrera8353 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Just press the button

  • @ihaveacoolnickname
    @ihaveacoolnickname 5 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    "You're a nice lady. Dries her right up." Hahahaha.

  • @SupaTraxHD
    @SupaTraxHD 5 ปีที่แล้ว +278

    This is what Drew Brees is doing during his injury

  • @AK33M
    @AK33M 5 ปีที่แล้ว +57

    Started off kind of slow, but then started landing hard punches with these jokes. I need more. Lol 😂🤣

  • @nataliaalfonso2662
    @nataliaalfonso2662 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    He’s the most accurate comic I’ve heard in ages!

  • @Arutha258
    @Arutha258 5 ปีที่แล้ว +56

    Some people just aren't cut out for the single life.

  • @heydhanzee6452
    @heydhanzee6452 4 ปีที่แล้ว +12

    I'll be 32 this year and still single. It hits me when sometimes I almost have no one to hang out with on the weekends, because the majority of my friends are married with kids, and they usually have plans with their own family on the weekends. And my friends who are not married yet, also usually have dates with their bf/gf. Lol

  • @HailedAsAMessiah
    @HailedAsAMessiah 5 ปีที่แล้ว +88

    I enjoy being single... Too many broken people in this world. You gotta protect your smiles and cries

    • @vik8860
      @vik8860 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      get married and do it fast.

    • @gurusmurf5921
      @gurusmurf5921 5 ปีที่แล้ว +17

      @@vik8860 and when he gets divorced in a couple of years he can wonder why getting married for the sake of being married didn't work out for him. It will be a real puzzler.

    • @amberl.8245
      @amberl.8245 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      I speak for all the women ready to find a husband when I say ignore vik 88.

    • @HailedAsAMessiah
      @HailedAsAMessiah 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      @@amberl.8245 much love if youre a positive sister. Its just very necessary to use discernment when dealing with folks. You still have to be open to good people tho

    • @HailedAsAMessiah
      @HailedAsAMessiah 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      That was what I was getting at... With the post

  • @margaritam.9118
    @margaritam.9118 4 ปีที่แล้ว +15

    Ok I’ve checked and now he has two adopted dogs and a cute comedian fiancée. It all went well 😌

  • @PaulKrukiel
    @PaulKrukiel 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

    Legend! Best comedian on earth. I would pay good money to see this full set.

  • @sonnyjoe954
    @sonnyjoe954 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    This guy is hilarious! His jokes and timing are great.

  • @angelodepaolo
    @angelodepaolo 5 ปีที่แล้ว +62

    Looks like Seth Myers’ brother who was raised by the dad’s secret family. Funny dude

  • @36isnotold
    @36isnotold 5 ปีที่แล้ว +148

    “Australians drink a lot. They turn a Tuesday into Coachella”

    • @rebelduck9077
      @rebelduck9077 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Stacy Steele Wisconsin...

    • @RealMexFoodShouldntGiveUDrrhea
      @RealMexFoodShouldntGiveUDrrhea 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      *laughs in Mexican*

    • @micahbenally5139
      @micahbenally5139 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      The only time I ever drank with some Australians I ended up getting into a fight with one of them and went to work 3 hours later. The party ended at 3 am and I went to work at six. Never again

    • @StrikerEureka85
      @StrikerEureka85 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      australians have nothing on norwegians. i drank with norwegians once and i swear i had a whole week hangover.

    • @Jdsteele96
      @Jdsteele96 3 ปีที่แล้ว

      Where do I find these people? At this point, I will do do what I must to be accepted as one of them. 😐

  • @dropmixforever4324
    @dropmixforever4324 4 ปีที่แล้ว +17

    I’m 43 and been single for years. I’m a pretty good looking guy, pretty smart, friendly and kind, yet here I am. I struggle to find words for how bad it sucks. I spent 2 years caring for my dying dad, which caused me to fall into a major depression, which is now just as bad plus I am grieving. I wish I had the courage to put myself out there when I feel this way, because I can’t stand this loneliness much longer. This is probably my karma for screwing around so much in my 20’s lol. Truth.

    • @WildBillHickums
      @WildBillHickums 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      I think you've created a mental prison, you need to release the shackles.

    • @supernice_auto
      @supernice_auto 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Where do you live? Do you try to date?

    • @jumb0shr1mp6
      @jumb0shr1mp6 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      It's time to get back out there man. It's never too late.

    • @dropmixforever4324
      @dropmixforever4324 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      supernice_auto In Fort Lauderdale, FL. No, I haven’t tried. I wouldn’t be much fun and I want to, want to. But I just don’t. Maybe it will all pass eventually and I will feel the like I could be a good partner to someone. I’ve just fallen into this comfort zone where I don’t have to worry about being judged, or misunderstood. I just feel so alone all the time. It’s a difficult situation to figure out.

    • @dropmixforever4324
      @dropmixforever4324 4 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      J T thanks man. I know. I will get better and regain my life again.

  • @1HeatWalk
    @1HeatWalk 2 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    Trust me, it's better to be single and be at peace than be in a terrible marriage. Does not mean you should not keep finding meaningful connections with people.

  • @andreagayle7510
    @andreagayle7510 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    Find someone with the same life goals. And be kind to each other.

  • @squadrillionaire4133
    @squadrillionaire4133 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Your style of comedy and delivery is excellent. I hope you find whatever it is you're looking for on the internet.

  • @morycwelt5807
    @morycwelt5807 5 ปีที่แล้ว +62

    He looks like he could be on a dollar bill. He's got founding father kind of vibe. Very WASPy :P

  • @mysterym444
    @mysterym444 5 ปีที่แล้ว +62

    Being single is the shit if you're cool. I love hanging out with me!

    • @Duryism
      @Duryism 5 ปีที่แล้ว +14

      Glad someone said it. When you're awesome, being single feels literally like always being around an awesome person.

    • @DSan-kl2yc
      @DSan-kl2yc 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Sounds sad. Like when you say your mom loves you

    • @MCVessels
      @MCVessels 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @Mr. No Reply You're both right and you're both wrong, as I allays say.

    • @WildBillHickums
      @WildBillHickums 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @@Duryism Perhaps they're delusions of grandeur, but to be honest, they get you through some hard times.

    • @Ruylopez778
      @Ruylopez778 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      @Mr. No Reply "nah bro you're just a sad, lonley loser" says the person calling others names on the internet

  • @spencerpennington07
    @spencerpennington07 3 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    I’m a thirty-two year-old graduate student. This guy’s material is way too relatable.

  • @ohmyblindman
    @ohmyblindman 5 ปีที่แล้ว +238

    Mean lesbian runs the warehouse, yeah, that would be the standard.

    • @ajs7878
      @ajs7878 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      As the camera flashes to a laughing lesian

  • @pryncessyanni
    @pryncessyanni 3 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Legit one of the funniest, most relatable sets...ever!!

  • @10RBREEZY
    @10RBREEZY 3 ปีที่แล้ว

    The fact that I barely smile or laugh. Especially laugh due to my depression made this priceless. I am grateful for that.

  • @sLeonardo22
    @sLeonardo22 4 ปีที่แล้ว +13

    “Dating in your 30’s and 40’s is like shopping at Marshalls”

  • @haroldasraz
    @haroldasraz 5 ปีที่แล้ว +85

    Do you need to suffer to create brilliant or even good art?

  • @Jimmyboygohome
    @Jimmyboygohome 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    This guys pretty funny I’d be interested to see more of his stand up

  • @librislibertas
    @librislibertas 21 วันที่ผ่านมา

    Yes! I cackled so hard! So relatable.

  • @gregjones3671
    @gregjones3671 5 ปีที่แล้ว

    Can write and deliver a good, smart joke w impeccable timing. Thanks man!

  • @TheProdigalCat
    @TheProdigalCat 5 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    "YOU'RE A NICE LADY!" lmfao

  • @TASconfidential
    @TASconfidential 4 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    Here’s a secret that many married women will never tell you:
    They regret it.
    Many people partner up either for validation, or out of fear of “loneliness”.
    Then they compromise their values, wants and needs for the sake of someone they “love”.
    The most married couples have that’s good is the dual incomes, and the family photos. Other than that, most marriages are filled with fussing, lack of sleep, frustration, passive aggressive behavior, resentment, sacrifice, and emotional drainage.

    • @MrsBee-uo2lc
      @MrsBee-uo2lc 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      Not in my marriage, don't know what is going on with ya"LL though...

    • @hgzmatt
      @hgzmatt 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      But there is always compromise? Both have to compromise to an extent. The majority doesn't want to be alone.. friends are not the same. Yeah maybe those negatives are a thing but let's not forget all the good stuff, that's the reason we put up with it. And there is no magic person out there that will just make it effortless.

  • @CaseyFinSF
    @CaseyFinSF 5 ปีที่แล้ว +23

    "It dries her right up..." great line... but not a pick up one.

  • @dnice374
    @dnice374 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    "I get grateful."
    Fantastic clip, gf and I laughed thru the whole thing.

  • @camrynhernandez5996
    @camrynhernandez5996 5 ปีที่แล้ว

    This dude is legit. Loved his comparisons. The marshals bit, the dog, everything was on point. Love the Costco sweater.

  • @algum.cara1
    @algum.cara1 4 ปีที่แล้ว +38

    You know what they say: marriage is the first step towards divorce

  • @zephyrjet122
    @zephyrjet122 4 ปีที่แล้ว +7

    The most I've L'd O L in a while, I like his dry sneak attack style. Esp since the Marshall's thing is 4 REAL 😆

  • @toddharwell7034
    @toddharwell7034 4 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    This was freaking hilarious!!! My goodness

  • @richardmichael7523
    @richardmichael7523 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    2:52" - I'm undefeated, I have a perfect record... I'm single😂😂

  • @DJMichaelAngelo
    @DJMichaelAngelo 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

    this dude's freaking hilarious! some of his "twist ending" punchlines remind me a lot of Wendy Leibman, another commedian with great surprise zingers, like the endings to her jokes kidna sneak up on you

  • @rayschultz387
    @rayschultz387 5 ปีที่แล้ว +63

    Dude looks like a young version of the snow shovel murderer from Home Alone.

    • @Mrsteisag2
      @Mrsteisag2 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Ray Schultz that’s a deep cut right there

    • @paulpiatt6887
      @paulpiatt6887 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      Damn, that’s cold 🥶

    • @BadBoyBobby85
      @BadBoyBobby85 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      The nice old man?

    • @saturnreturn4498
      @saturnreturn4498 4 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Your comment was the cherry on top after watching that set.

    • @simbadurio444
      @simbadurio444 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Ray Schultz lol

  • @tiotito31
    @tiotito31 5 ปีที่แล้ว +18

    "I'm undefeated."

  • @jimvarnier7931
    @jimvarnier7931 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    My first time catching Mr. Haynes....I really liked this bit! When you can relate and somehow share/occupy the comedian/storyteller perspective it's always is good...and not easy to do...those performers that can...good things to come. For sure I will look for more. Stay High, Jim Varnier.

  • @NoctisAquila
    @NoctisAquila 20 วันที่ผ่านมา

    more!!! mooreee!!! love his stufff

  • @kylejaynes2949
    @kylejaynes2949 5 ปีที่แล้ว +218

    This guy has oscillating "fans".

  • @coffinsmoke1385
    @coffinsmoke1385 5 ปีที่แล้ว +64

    44. Divorced. Have No one and no money or friends. Your doing better than me.

    • @phuk8865
      @phuk8865 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      How does that happen?

    • @patterjak
      @patterjak 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Hope it improves for you, been divorced at 40 had to go back home to parents etc.

    • @dbo1111
      @dbo1111 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Get after it and know you can start over

    • @vampjoseph
      @vampjoseph 5 ปีที่แล้ว +3

      38. Never married (almost engaged before I realized she was toxic af), and same.

    • @schmiggidy
      @schmiggidy 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      Same - 44 (divorced @ 37) - except I'm surrounded by phenomenal parents and my own children. Far from giving up - so much life yet to explore!

  • @killerqueendopamine
    @killerqueendopamine 4 ปีที่แล้ว +48

    He looks like Drew Brees’ less successful brother

    • @radiorakim
      @radiorakim 4 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Women can see who is successful or not

  • @ramaksafi3174
    @ramaksafi3174 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    I am dying!!! Close to the end it was absolutely crushing laughter 🤣😂
    🙏

  • @moes_film
    @moes_film 4 ปีที่แล้ว

    this was surprisingly enjoyable. glad i clicked.

  • @briansounalath
    @briansounalath 5 ปีที่แล้ว +14

    omg he's spot on about dating in 30's

  • @roaringlaughter3812
    @roaringlaughter3812 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I feel bad laughing 😂 😭 you can feel the misery

  • @galacticwarlock2271
    @galacticwarlock2271 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    This guy is hilarious.

  • @dayhop3257
    @dayhop3257 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

    He was really funny! need more of him

  • @Canny-Octopus
    @Canny-Octopus ปีที่แล้ว +2

    He's right, fighting to win is no way to make a relationship work.

  • @Corkfish1
    @Corkfish1 5 ปีที่แล้ว +26

    I'm 60 and never married. Thrilled I escaped that fate!

    • @Alex10daysago
      @Alex10daysago 5 ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Corkfish1 did u want kids?

    • @Corkfish1
      @Corkfish1 5 ปีที่แล้ว +7

      @@Alex10daysago I wasnt especially interested in that. If you are passionate about having kids then that's a different situation. I've always had the impression that most guys end up having kids because "that's what you're supposed to do". When you're in your 20's men are vulnerable to falling into that trap. I don't regret not having kids.

    • @Alex10daysago
      @Alex10daysago 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

      Corkfish1 down the road I want to have a kid. But a baby from an egg donor. Never a full on wife. So she can one day change and take my money and someone I have grown to love. Im all about enjoying women and having girlfriends. But thankfully now science allows men and women for that matter to have a Family without a partner. Im 35 now and on occasion I do get the baby blues.

    • @Corkfish1
      @Corkfish1 5 ปีที่แล้ว +2

      @@Alex10daysago maybe date a single mom if you want to be a father. I've just seen horror stories in marriages that you would not believe. Guys who were emotionally and financially devastated.

    • @Alex10daysago
      @Alex10daysago 5 ปีที่แล้ว +5

      Corkfish1 same here. But I dont want to raise anyones kids or want a woman to engage with me on the off chance she can tie me down and have me pay the bill on her rugrats.
      Kids are cool. But my own kid with 50% my genes would be pretty cool. Going to museums. Concerts. Disneyland. All that cheesy stuff. But with your own flesh and blood. Because in the end we can only have so many one night stands. We can only fit so many toys in the garage. Sometimes it be nice to come hone and make dinner with your own kid.

  • @benjimann24
    @benjimann24 5 ปีที่แล้ว +10

    This is hilarious but also low key motivational af being 29

    • @yeshalloween
      @yeshalloween 4 ปีที่แล้ว

      Ben Mann get on that!

  • @zacharyshoberg84
    @zacharyshoberg84 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    I’m in the same place Brutha...
    Gotta laugh at it ✊

  • @thestormlscoming
    @thestormlscoming 2 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    He’s good. This is so relatable

  • @lordhuebi
    @lordhuebi หลายเดือนก่อน

    great set

  • @thedimensionbeyond2790
    @thedimensionbeyond2790 5 ปีที่แล้ว +4

    i'm 38. this guy is on point. he's so on point. lol

    • @DarianHarder
      @DarianHarder 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      I am 41 and single for the rest of my life The Dimension Beyond

    • @inertiaspinner555
      @inertiaspinner555 5 ปีที่แล้ว

      40,single and whenever I start to think about anything other than Smash&Dash I just reflect on the past 4 decades
      *i’m good*