Appreciate this video! I’m in my 30s now but when i was in my early 20s I was impulsive and reactive. My parents divorced and growing up with a bipolar dad really took a toll on my life. It wasn’t until the pandemic that I started to become aware of my lifelong sensitivity to sensory overload and hyper sensitive to injustice. I became vegetarian and then vegan 15 years ago for this reason and it changed my life for the better bc i began to live in alignment w/ my value system. My therapist then introduced me to being an empath and HSP. I found myself on a self discovery journey, and finally able to understand why I’ve always felt different. Ive dated both stable and emotionally unstable men who most likely had BPD. The differences were very apparent - their explosive outbursts, splitting, and addictive tendencies/ self harm and abnormal attachment styles/idealizing people. One of the guys would show up to my place unannounced after I broke up and knock on my windows and beg me to open my door. It was a scary experience. But to be clear the other guy I dated with bpd didn’t do those things but he did make me feel guilty or bad if I didn’t say what he wanted to hear or if I made a small joke and he misinterpreted it. Anyway, it’s been a journey and have recently realized that the path for HSP and bpd can easily cross and be confused. Somewhere along the way I’m grateful I learned mindfulness techniques like, how to set clear boundaries and how to regulate my emotions. It changed my life for the better. I hope this helps someone else who is on their HSP journey ❤
Question/idea for a future video - should HSP and BPD date each other? does having similar sensitivities mean a better understanding or is this more harmful? In my experience I learned that wounded BPD partners tended to push boundaries a lot and made me question myself after I had already done my self work and had stable relationships. They really drained me and brought out a side of me that I had worked hard to heal. I did however feel more empathy and connected to them, as if maybe I could be the one to help them bc of my experience with HSP. In my cases, learned they were causing me more emotional harm so I had to end it. Anyway would love to hear your thoughts!
I also grew up with a dad with a BPD diagnosis. I am HSP and besides the trauma of growing up in that family I had to endure the unimagineable suffering of animals in factory farms. It was very traumatic for me and there was no one who was able to help me. I bc a vegetarian and now I have been vegan 11 years. Its easier to breathe knowing that I live according to my values but it is very hard living in this world knowing how awful we treat other animals😢
Thank you for sharing your journey! It's inspiring to see how you've turned challenges into growth and self-awareness. Your insights will surely resonate with others who are navigating similar paths.
@@rebeckaa2854l am an hsp and l had a profound Spiritual awakening on 12-11-15, l was guided to Natural law aka God’s law and once l innerstood what a right was l gave up being complicit in any abuse/ murder of our animal brothers and sisters. A right is any action that brings NO harm to another sentient ( one with a nervous system) being, anything else is wrong!
@@rebeckaa2854 yes! So relatable. I went vegan bc of my background in the food industry and learning the sad truth of factory farming. But it all ties into our HSP abilities. Thanks for sharing ♥️
Yes! This is me. I get accused of being dramatic by my invalidating mother. 😕she would accuse me of being overly confident when I’m actually feeling insecure. It hurts to not feel understood! I don’t feel much of the positives of emotion. I have anhedonia that has plagued me for 20 years now. Sometimes I feel a lack of emotions like I have a black hole of emptiness in me. Sometimes my “highest emotion” is agitation. And sometimes I’m am very sensitive too. All of it is a bit confusing. Most of the time I respond with a deep sadness even to happy things like something is actually broken in there. Thank you for all the free help you provide!! You definitely help people.
You're absolutely right! CPTSD can really intensify emotional experiences, especially when combined with ADD or ADHD. It's important to acknowledge and seek support for these challenges.
Im highly sensitive and have cptsd. It’s a horrible combination! I’m so sorry for anyone that has this personality type, life will always be a struggle without good people understanding who we are who are willing to accept us and love us as we are
I have BPD (under medications ) but i still get terrifying hallucinations .How to manage this? Its very distressing and i cant study at night and early morning .Help?
Dr Fox, I would love to hear your thoughts on healthy conversational skills for people who grew up around BPD and may even have some maladaptive behaviors themselves but want to start connecting with new people in a healthier way. Some folks may not even have been exposed to healthy conversational patterns when they are seeking a new social group. Any recommendations?
I think it would be more useful to look for healing from the specific trauma rather than healing from growing up with someone who has BPD. BPD is very complex and it is not commonly correlated with causing others trauma, although we are all human, so it is very possible. It isn't about the diagnosis of the person but the trauma they caused you. If you look for trauma that has to do with growing up with someone who has BPD, you're just going to find a bunch of stigmatizing generalizations made by unprofessional clinical psychologists that will only cause more harm. This is why I suggest this. I hope this helps, and take care.
Jeez, I’ve known for a decade that I’m an HSP with an anxious attachment style but realizing I’m also quiet borderline has provided a huge missing piece to everything
I'm biased towards thinking about it in an attachment way, but the reality is that it's impossible to really know and that there might be things we just don't know about yet or don't even know to ask about yet. But if you think about our nervous system as being regulated by our relationship with an early attachment figure, you can think about it like having an umbrella to weather the storms of life. We are social beings and that early attunement is necessary for us to internalize an accurate version of ourselves and our internal experience. It might be that people with a sensitive temperament pick up things in the environment that a more stoic temperament might discard. Or it might be that in an environment of emotional deprivation, a person might develop a heightened drive towards sensitivity in order to receive any morsel of attunement they can get, like a person becomes more hungry in environments without food, if they didn't they would not have the drive to find food and they would starve. I'm curious to see what developments are coming with the research, in the meantime I go to therapy and DBT because let's face it, it's rough either way lol.
You’ve made some really insightful points! The connection between our early attachments and how we navigate life is indeed complex, and it’s great that you’re exploring this through therapy and DBT.
I have both Hyper Empathy (Syndrome) and superficial emotions. 6:32 Seperating intensity and regulation is a promising answer, I seem to have excessive regulation to the point of looking like a psychopath.
It's fascinating how different emotional experiences can shape our perceptions of ourselves. Finding that balance between intensity and regulation can be a real journey!
This is helpful. I m highly HSP but I can regulate . But I think my sister is all about herself and sensitive and can break apart things. I never did … I never saw her for six years in two continents but she still tells bad things behind me about things I never did … I still Iove her despite the challenges I have in my life but I wish she never sees me anymore to be as bad as she described
It's great to hear that you found the video helpful! Navigating relationships, especially with family, can be really challenging. Remember to prioritize your own well-being while maintaining that love for your sister.
I'm from South Africa 🇿🇦 my grandson got all the signs he get very agrisive to others and his family I took him to the Dr cave him medication but we can't take this anymore he layer steeling manipulation what everything his way if not he gets very acresife towards Family sucider also we don't know anymore what to do 😢😢😢😢
I'm really sorry to hear that you're facing such a tough situation. It's important to seek professional help and support. Have you considered talking to a counselor or therapist who specializes in behavioral issues? They might be able to provide you with some strategies to help manage this.
Cluster-B disorders have terrible names. I would suggest "Overly Ambitious PD", "Attention dependent PD" and "Emotionally Vulnerable PD". I don't have one for ASPD yet.
Hahaha. I have BPD and I promise, I absolutely love art. It really depends on what you, as an individual, enjoy. Also, people with BPD are almost always (if not always) an HSP, so they may correlate as well.
So a Karen attitude can be derived from a BPD personality? I noticed that people with a Karen attitude tend to be very impulsive and childish and also tend to avoid consequences by minimizing their behavior
That's an interesting observation! It’s always intriguing to explore the connections between personality traits and behaviors. Everyone has their own unique experiences!
Don’t care. Ur book and the therapist who used it didn’t help. I’m done trying to figure out why and how and blah blah. I accept this hell and the fate that comes with it.
I got your new Guided BPD journal and I'm enjoying it so far. My life is so flippy-floppy and this journal feels like it will unflip-my flop!
Appreciate this video! I’m in my 30s now but when i was in my early 20s I was impulsive and reactive. My parents divorced and growing up with a bipolar dad really took a toll on my life. It wasn’t until the pandemic that I started to become aware of my lifelong sensitivity to sensory overload and hyper sensitive to injustice. I became vegetarian and then vegan 15 years ago for this reason and it changed my life for the better bc i began to live in alignment w/ my value system. My therapist then introduced me to being an empath and HSP. I found myself on a self discovery journey, and finally able to understand why I’ve always felt different. Ive dated both stable and emotionally unstable men who most likely had BPD. The differences were very apparent - their explosive outbursts, splitting, and addictive tendencies/ self harm and abnormal attachment styles/idealizing people. One of the guys would show up to my place unannounced after I broke up and knock on my windows and beg me to open my door. It was a scary experience. But to be clear the other guy I dated with bpd didn’t do those things but he did make me feel guilty or bad if I didn’t say what he wanted to hear or if I made a small joke and he misinterpreted it. Anyway, it’s been a journey and have recently realized that the path for HSP and bpd can easily cross and be confused. Somewhere along the way I’m grateful I learned mindfulness techniques like, how to set clear boundaries and how to regulate my emotions. It changed my life for the better. I hope this helps someone else who is on their HSP journey ❤
Question/idea for a future video - should HSP and BPD date each other? does having similar sensitivities mean a better understanding or is this more harmful?
In my experience I learned that wounded BPD partners tended to push boundaries a lot and made me question myself after I had already done my self work and had stable relationships. They really drained me and brought out a side of me that I had worked hard to heal. I did however feel more empathy and connected to them, as if maybe I could be the one to help them bc of my experience with HSP. In my cases, learned they were causing me more emotional harm so I had to end it.
Anyway would love to hear your thoughts!
I also grew up with a dad with a BPD diagnosis. I am HSP and besides the trauma of growing up in that family I had to endure the unimagineable suffering of animals in factory farms. It was very traumatic for me and there was no one who was able to help me. I bc a vegetarian and now I have been vegan 11 years. Its easier to breathe knowing that I live according to my values but it is very hard living in this world knowing how awful we treat other animals😢
Thank you for sharing your journey! It's inspiring to see how you've turned challenges into growth and self-awareness. Your insights will surely resonate with others who are navigating similar paths.
@@rebeckaa2854l am an hsp and l had a profound Spiritual awakening on 12-11-15, l was guided to Natural law aka God’s law and once l innerstood what a right was l gave up being complicit in any abuse/ murder of our animal brothers and sisters. A right is any action that brings NO harm to another sentient ( one with a nervous system) being, anything else is wrong!
@@rebeckaa2854 yes! So relatable. I went vegan bc of my background in the food industry and learning the sad truth of factory farming. But it all ties into our HSP abilities. Thanks for sharing ♥️
Yes! This is me. I get accused of being dramatic by my invalidating mother. 😕she would accuse me of being overly confident when I’m actually feeling insecure. It hurts to not feel understood!
I don’t feel much of the positives of emotion. I have anhedonia that has plagued me for 20 years now. Sometimes I feel a lack of emotions like I have a black hole of emptiness in me. Sometimes my “highest emotion” is agitation. And sometimes I’m am very sensitive too. All of it is a bit confusing. Most of the time I respond with a deep sadness even to happy things like something is actually broken in there.
Thank you for all the free help you provide!! You definitely help people.
❤🥺🙏
CPTSD can also make emotions overwhelming and unpredictable
Add on ADD or adhd and it’s really hard to control your emotions.
You're absolutely right! CPTSD can really intensify emotional experiences, especially when combined with ADD or ADHD. It's important to acknowledge and seek support for these challenges.
Yes c-ptsd is very similar to BPD.
Thanks for sharing your knowledge!! Your clients are so lucky to have someone who really knows their stuff
Im highly sensitive and have cptsd. It’s a horrible combination! I’m so sorry for anyone that has this personality type, life will always be a struggle without good people understanding who we are who are willing to accept us and love us as we are
:( i feel that so much
I can see how being sensitive can be confused with BPD. But the splitting, fear of abandonment, extreme thinking, etc. are mostly a BPD feature.
Can it be both ❤. Thank you for what you do
Yes
I got adhd, asd and bpd. I mask so much that most ppl just think im an a hole . Im not, it's just everything hurts. It always hurts
Sending love to you. I’m sorry
I have BPD (under medications ) but i still get terrifying hallucinations .How to manage this? Its very distressing and i cant study at night and early morning .Help?
Dr Fox, I would love to hear your thoughts on healthy conversational skills for people who grew up around BPD and may even have some maladaptive behaviors themselves but want to start connecting with new people in a healthier way. Some folks may not even have been exposed to healthy conversational patterns when they are seeking a new social group. Any recommendations?
I think it would be more useful to look for healing from the specific trauma rather than healing from growing up with someone who has BPD. BPD is very complex and it is not commonly correlated with causing others trauma, although we are all human, so it is very possible. It isn't about the diagnosis of the person but the trauma they caused you. If you look for trauma that has to do with growing up with someone who has BPD, you're just going to find a bunch of stigmatizing generalizations made by unprofessional clinical psychologists that will only cause more harm. This is why I suggest this. I hope this helps, and take care.
Jeez, I’ve known for a decade that I’m an HSP with an anxious attachment style but realizing I’m also quiet borderline has provided a huge missing piece to everything
I'm so glad this video was helpful for you. I wish you well.
I'm biased towards thinking about it in an attachment way, but the reality is that it's impossible to really know and that there might be things we just don't know about yet or don't even know to ask about yet. But if you think about our nervous system as being regulated by our relationship with an early attachment figure, you can think about it like having an umbrella to weather the storms of life. We are social beings and that early attunement is necessary for us to internalize an accurate version of ourselves and our internal experience. It might be that people with a sensitive temperament pick up things in the environment that a more stoic temperament might discard. Or it might be that in an environment of emotional deprivation, a person might develop a heightened drive towards sensitivity in order to receive any morsel of attunement they can get, like a person becomes more hungry in environments without food, if they didn't they would not have the drive to find food and they would starve. I'm curious to see what developments are coming with the research, in the meantime I go to therapy and DBT because let's face it, it's rough either way lol.
You’ve made some really insightful points! The connection between our early attachments and how we navigate life is indeed complex, and it’s great that you’re exploring this through therapy and DBT.
I have both Hyper Empathy (Syndrome) and superficial emotions. 6:32 Seperating intensity and regulation is a promising answer, I seem to have excessive regulation to the point of looking like a psychopath.
It's fascinating how different emotional experiences can shape our perceptions of ourselves. Finding that balance between intensity and regulation can be a real journey!
I'm an HSP so I can identify with Borderlines
I'm so glad this video was helpful for you. I wish you well.
Same. Not BPD but can really empathize with them as I know how to feel the ups and downs.
I thought the big thing about HSP is overstimulation from well stimuli and less to do with the emotions side.
One influences the other. Not mutually exclusive. Be well
❤
This is helpful. I m highly HSP but I can regulate . But I think my sister is all about herself and sensitive and can break apart things. I never did … I never saw her for six years in two continents but she still tells bad things behind me about things I never did … I still Iove her despite the challenges I have in my life but I wish she never sees me anymore to be as bad as she described
It's great to hear that you found the video helpful! Navigating relationships, especially with family, can be really challenging. Remember to prioritize your own well-being while maintaining that love for your sister.
I'm from South Africa 🇿🇦 my grandson got all the signs he get very agrisive to others and his family I took him to the Dr cave him medication but we can't take this anymore he layer steeling manipulation what everything his way if not he gets very acresife towards Family sucider also we don't know anymore what to do 😢😢😢😢
I'm really sorry to hear that you're facing such a tough situation. It's important to seek professional help and support. Have you considered talking to a counselor or therapist who specializes in behavioral issues? They might be able to provide you with some strategies to help manage this.
Why can’t someone with bpd also be highly sensitive?
I was thinking the same thing
You, can. Please check out the video
I think BPD is developed by HSP. If you experience trauma, bingo BPD. Speaking from experience ❤
People with BPD are automatically HSP.
❤❤❤
I'm so glad this video was helpful for you. I wish you well.
The label BPD should be done away with. It causes further trauma to individuals who have already had more than their share of trauma.
Cluster-B disorders have terrible names. I would suggest "Overly Ambitious PD", "Attention dependent PD" and "Emotionally Vulnerable PD". I don't have one for ASPD yet.
I thought I might have BPD but it's more likely that I am a HSP. HSPs usually have a deeper appreciation of art, right?
Hahaha. I have BPD and I promise, I absolutely love art. It really depends on what you, as an individual, enjoy. Also, people with BPD are almost always (if not always) an HSP, so they may correlate as well.
Empaths who have lost their crisis management may be called HSPs.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts! It’s always great to hear different viewpoints on such an important topic.
So a Karen attitude can be derived from a BPD personality? I noticed that people with a Karen attitude tend to be very impulsive and childish and also tend to avoid consequences by minimizing their behavior
That's an interesting observation! It’s always intriguing to explore the connections between personality traits and behaviors. Everyone has their own unique experiences!
People with BPD usually tend to have more empathy and a fear of rejection, so probably not, but it isn't impossible.
Don’t care. Ur book and the therapist who used it didn’t help.
I’m done trying to figure out why and how and blah blah.
I accept this hell and the fate that comes with it.