I particularly like the comment about pronouns and name: "it wasn't difficult because of resistance but because of habit." and that's very true. My friend only changed name and I kept slipping up so one night I actually sat down, watching a picture of her and I repeated her new name a few dozens times so my brain would stop messing me up.
I love the fact that your mom had so many concerns - but all of them not being about you changing gender but about your health and what a surgery or the hormones would do, etc. (e. g. if anything could go wrong etc.) That shows just how much love she has for you and I think that's wonderful to see.
Love how honest your mum is! So refreshing to see a mother who actually listens to her child and even admit that yes she may have found it confusing at times. I think that's why lots of people are so mean about transgenders because they just don't understand. Your mother is a great example of what happens when we communicate with each other and listen and learn. Am so happy you had the support of your parents! So nice seeing stuff like this on TH-cam. Buzz feed brought me your story and I think it's wonderful! Also I love your hair! It always looks amazing!
+TheStripeyStudios I'm so grateful for how she (and the rest of my family) handled me being trans, that support makes everything seem easier. Thank you! :)
Thank you so much for this video. Your mother is warm and absolutely lovely! As the mom of a 19 yo who very recently started transitioning ftm, hearing your Mom's perspective has been extremely helpful. Thanks again!
Your mom is very sweet, too! It's cute that she has a LOT to say (all of which I appreciated) while your dad in the other video is like, "yeah, it was fine, that's it." haha.
I’m jealous. I told my mom recently that I am ftm. She did not take it very well. My sister was with me(supportive of it) and continued to a different subject. She then called me by my preferred pronouns, he. She then yelled “He? You mean my baby girl --?” She is in denial and it is tearing me up. I’m scared that this will tear us apart. But she is angry and thinks it’s her fault and won’t accept information. I’m depressed and suicidal and I am crying while writing this. You are amazing and I love this channel. But sometimes I need a person to vent to. Well, I have no one. No friends are really comfortable to talk to. No one is there right now. My dad and all of my household are supportive, my friends, but not my moms side of the family. It hurts. And I just want a friend. I needed to vent so I chose you. You are an amazing person. I cannot express the love for you. You’re brave and handsome. But I will never be like that. But I wanted you to know, your videos keep me alive somehow. But it doesn’t matter how, it just does. Seeing you and your family, your transition, your pride. It all hurts me a little, but then gives me hope. Don’t take this as a suicide note, I’m not gonna. But I’m just venting to a person I trust without even knowing them. Thank you for reading this, it means a lot.
Hey there, I am so sorry your mum isn't being supportive. It hurts, it feels like a rejection, it is unfair. I sincerely hope for your sake that she is just 'in shock' & comes around to being supportive, loving & accepting like you deserve. And you DO deserve love & acceptance! A lot of folks do come around. And if she doesn't it isn't a reflection on you. I know that is hard. I am cis, female (& old! 41yrs) but when i came out as gay when i was a teenager my mother was hateful. There were other issues too & I ended up independent at a young age. However my mother did end up accepting my sexuality, was very close to my now exwife and years later my little sister also came out as lesbian and has had nothing but support from her. People change. It isn't your responsibility to educate your parents but maybe sending her links to videos like this? But if she doesn't you have your sister, you dad & his side of the family. Focus on & remind yourself of the support you're getting. If you need to give yourself space away from people who don't accept you that is ok, it is important for you mental health. And if you need some mother-type nurturing energy there is a subreddit called r/MomForAMinute. Yeh i know reddit can be toxic but it has it's pockets of kindness & that is one of them. I post on there a bit, giving 'mum acceptance' to folks who need it. Also you are early on your trans journey? When you see a confident, handsome assured transguy like Jamie remember he is many years ahead of you. He has heaps of videos going back years. You will bloom! A few years from now you will too be a handsome, dapper cool guy looking back thinking about the worried young bloke he was at the beginning of the journey. You will be proud how far you have come. Strength, love, kindness & hugs to you, son.
Beth SN thank you so much I am literally crying. I’m going to find that reddit thing. Thank you so much. I was at a really rough point, new seizures, two different infections in my body, and so much more. When my mom didn’t accept me, it broke me after being vulnerable. You made me cry and smile. You’re a good person. :’)
Hey, please dont. Im sure that your mom will realise what shes doing wrong, and im sure that she can change for you. Im glad you have a sister thats supportive.
Your mom has the best and strongest accent. I loved it. It's amazing how supportive your mom is and it makes me feel good that your mom makes you feel great.
What an incredible mother you have! She is absolutely lovely and honest and so informative about her point of view with every detail. She is magnificent and this video is so awesome!!
And your mum is so beautiful too oh my gosh knowing that she struggled and was confused but always put your feelings first and really wanted to make sure you were okay and really just fully committed to being your mum and ugh I'm choking up you have a beautiful family
Every time I feel like coming out to my mum, I watch this video and it makes me feel like it will be so much easier to tell her. I know she will be accepting, but I also know I'll definitely have to educate her on what being trans really is. I'm so glad you posted this :)
I had no idea your parents are both Scottish. I’m so blown away by that fact, because I’m trans and from Edinburgh and you are my biggest help ( with your videos) in my transition and finding myself. This is just so wholesome to find out!
As a supportive mother of an American transgender FTM adult child, I found comfort in this video. My son recently told me he doesn't want me in his life. Since he came out as bisexual, lesbian, then trans I have been nothing but supportive. Jamie, like your mum I had questions and concerns about the gender dysphoria and what made your feel more male than female. I love my child, boy, girl, gender fluid...etc. I just want him to know that I want to support him and love him for who he truly is. I did my best to share my admiration for his bravery of coming out, educate people in the family about my son's FTM transition. As of last week, my son stated he does not want me to be a part of his life as I was not supportive. HUGE stab in my heart! I am being rejected by my FTM son for being supportive and an ally. Do you know of anyone who is a parent of a transgender young adult who has been rejected by their trans child? I have been a huge supporter of the LGBTQ community my entire life. My parents had several gay friends. Two of them became trans with full surgeries. I also have several friends who are LGBT and love them dearly. As a parent having a gay then trans child, this was easy for me to accept. Like your mum, it takes time to learn the pronouns but the look is easy to accept quickly. However, somewhere on my son's journey, he doesn't see me as being supportive. I not sure what wrong I did by him, but it's enough for him to cut me out of his life. ::Crying:: Do you have any idea what he may be going through during his transition from FTM mentally and emotionally with hormone therapy? I am very worried about him and I want to know how I can be supportive of my son. I miss him so much and I want to help him in his journey. Thank you for listening. Cheers, H
I saw your comment and my heart broke. Just know that things are going to get better. I'm a cis man just trying to learn and I ended up in these videos out of curiosity, so I have neither experience nor advise for you. But you have my full support, be sure that everything is going to be alright.
Hi! I know this comment is old but I saw it and thought I might be able to provide another perspective for you or anyone else that may read this in the future if you’re still in the same situation. I’m not FtM, I’m non binary which falls under the transgender umbrella so while no two transgender people have the same journey, a lot of us will share in similar experiences and feelings. When it comes to supporting people we love, different people will have different support needs. The key is to be able to listen to what it is they need as an individual. It goes beyond just verbal communication as some people have a hard time being able to put their needs into words. Body language and actions can tell nearly as much as words can, sometimes more. Maybe your son was telling you more about what he needed that you realized and it came off as ignoring? In my opinion and from my own experiences, it’s best when someone asks what I need for them to be able to truly support me. It’s more than just using the correct pronouns or “oh my parent said they still love me so the other hardships that come with transitioning don’t matter anymore.” That should be the bare minimum. To me, being a parent means unconditional love. Not love in SPITE of my gender, but REGARDLESS of my gender. So maybe ask yourself what you could’ve done better rather than what you did wrong. Could you have listened better? Could you have put more emphasis on him rather than making it about what YOU did right? Could you have opened your heart and mind better for his choice in partner? Could you have accompanied him to doctors appointments if that’s what he would have liked? Could you have given him more space and time to process things privately? Sometimes reframing things in your mind can help you see things differently, and hindsight is 20/20. If your answers to any of those things (or any others that might apply more to your personal relationship) maybe reach out to him? Apologize for not being there in the way he needed and really mean it. Then maybe he could offer you some more insight. But don’t push anything with him or it could do even more damage to your relationship. Anyway, I hope maybe this could be helpful to you or anyone. But of course remember that this is just my own perspective and it differs from person to person. I wish both you and your son all the best.
I LOVE this video, Jammi!! What a wonderful person your mum is! Bless your hearts. I'm going to send this to my mom. Started T last night. My mom has been amazing, too, and I don't know what I would have done without her. This will make her feel good, I'm sure. All the best and HAPPY NEW YEAR!
May or may not be feeling confused about whether I’m trans or not and binging a bunch of Jammidodger’s, NoahFinnce’s, and Sam Collins’s videos to make me feel better because they always do
how lovely is your mum?! I found this video very easy to relate to and more appreciative of my parents who are just as supportive as your mum. nice one!
This video perfectly demonstrated the sweetest love a Mother should have for a child. Unconditional/kind. Your Mum is lovely/loving/eloquent and her accent made the sweetest words.... all the sweeter. Thank you so much for sharing. :)
Aw wow. I'm so glad I found this gem. I've followed you for a while because I'm the mum of a non-binary teen and really working to do the right things by them. So many times as parents we get the message that unless we get it all "right" immediately we are somehow not supportive or accepting and I think it's really important to know that just because we slip up it's like your mom said...out of habit not malice. We're learning too! Love you and and your family sharing your journey so that those of us just coming through it have some good models. ❤️
+ThisTinyGlitch I came out to my parents just over a year ago and they still don't talk about it, haha. It's a process, longer than others for some people. Hope they can come around for you soon!
+Jason Clarke I'm sorry, hopefully they accept you soon! I actually had a conversation with them since I posted that, there's still a long way to go but I think they'll come round in the end
Hi James, I just wanted to say I've been watching your videos and I think they're all so fantastic, but your videos with your parents have been my favourites. Your mum and dad are amazing and you are an example of just how happy and healthy a person can be if they are surrounded by love and support. xx
your mother is so incredible and lovely and I hope that she is aware of just how amazing she is. this makes me so happy seeing that you maintained suck a strong relationship with your family. all the love!
I like how all the concerns were about you- I've seen three other situations where people's parents made their kids transition all about them and its so refreshing to see a good parent focused on YOUR happiness and well being.
Jammi, you are so awesome with your mum! You are simply an awesome man and seeing your mum, that makes a lot of sense. I've always been so happy for you, but now seeing you with your loving mum, I am even more happy. Jammi, I am so proud of you and so grateful for the mum you have! And incidentally, you are one handsome dude! ......Ray
I had to watch this a second time. Tell your mom that she is amazing. I admire her and look up to her. Tell her that she could not have done better in this video. Love how well she explained her thoughts and feelings on everything so clearly.
Your mom is fantastic! The fact that she expressed her real concerns adds to the authenticity of what she says. You have a terrific family, and you're terrific too! 😊
To those who recently came out to their family and friends it will take time. It will take a lot of time for people to get used to the situation. Be understanding I know you've dealt with all this pain about holding your feelings back for years but I promise you eventually you will get to a place of comfort. I got my religious mother to support me almost 2 years after I came out. I had to explain why I need to transition and why I feel the way I do. Communication is everything. Good luck to all of you 💕💕
Out of curiosity, having such a supportive mum, since she chose your birth name, did she have any say in chosing the name Jamie? Also what a lovely honest woman. A true inspiration to parents everywhere.
this was so heartwarming. i can't even think of another word for it. but just the love and support for you and your life, and everything about it, just made me so emotional. good for her and good for you. glad to see such wonderful people in the world
thats awesome that your mum supports you that much :-) happy for you! My mum takes me to the gender clinics but she doesn't fully support me unfortunately
You have the best parents. They are amazing and so accepting. I love that they both mention that how you felt was more important than how they felt. My mother keeps telling me that I'm "doing this just to hurt me" and that I don't care about how she feels. Why doesn't she consider how it makes me feel? You are so lucky to have your parents. Treasure them always.
Your mum is amazing, she was so thoughtful with her answers, and she would make a great public speaker. Maybe a youtube channel of her own where she can put up her own videos on being the parent of a trans person? May help other families who might not be as supportive as yours? Just a thought! A very happy 2017 to you and your family xx
Your Mum is one of the most darling people I have ever seen and no doubt is a great person as a parent and friend. Seeing you both do a Q&A video together is so endearing and touching beyond words plus one all parents who have children come out to them should take as a model and learn from. Love and acceptance-that's what parents should show their kids when they want to be open about their sexuality. God bless and keep you both 🥰
I’m so moved Im crying listening to your story and now seeing your mom being so kind and supportive. Really happy seeing your journey and how kind your parents are. All the best Jamie
Parenting done right - seems stupid to even say the obvious but we know that not all parents are this supportive, willing to learn and loving of their trans kids. What a babe she is 🥰
I admire how she puts her child's well-being ahead of her own concerns and hesitation. She was open to discuss and learn about a rare and delicate subject, she listened to her child's thoughts and feelings, she saw the benefits long-term for her child's life. She supported her child in all this turbulent transition phase because she wanted him to have a life and not be ostracized from society. This makes her an example of parent and a point of reference. I wish more parents follow her example and accept their kids' life choices, whether trans or not. Love to all!
WOW!! what a great mom. Such a great person to help you thru your new life and you helping her as well. I love to see such dignity and respect on both sides. 😊😊😊
How fortunate for you having a wonderful mum. Your mum is a sweetheart and a Scottish sweetheart to boot. Excellent video. Bless your mum for doing this.
This is such a delight to watch. I hope one day my parents come around to be like yours. Unfortunately it'll probably be a long time until that happens, but in the meantime, it's wonderful to see people who are accepted by their families and friends.
I love how open your mom is about you being transgender and the struggles that come as parent of a transgender child! I also love how you can tell she totally loves you and accepts you as you are!
Again, "Late to the party", Jammi, your ability to educate the rest of us as to the steps necessary to go from 'who you were to who you are now' is a credit to both you AND your Parents! They are the individuals who created YOU - and through the genetics, all of you came together as 1 family unit. Thanks to you, I've verbally "adopted" a FTM Son, a wonderful individual I et through work. Your videos opened my eyes as to the Journey Path that it takes to transition into "a New You". Your ability to educate others has given me a Blessing I never envisioned - that is, in my 70 years of My Journey (next week / 8/25) I've received my FIRST "Father's Day Card" from a beautiful young man who accepted "my offer" to 'just be a Dad' - someone who Loves Him and who is there for him, should he need it. On the 25th, "my Son and his girlfriend" will join my Husband and I for a special celebration; my 70th Birthday, as well as our 26th Anniversary as a Couple (we'll be married 5 years on 9/10/22). Thanks to you, we're building a new Family with Love and respect for one another! Many Thanks!
Thanks so much to your Mum and Dad. What beautiful down to earth people. Your mother was so eloquent and honest. The more we all talk and share the more normalised transgender will become. You and your family are beacons. Thanks again Jamie.
Thank you so incredibly much for helping me understand my close loved one who came out a while ago. You have no idea how much you and your family educates and help me being strong for our boy here. 💜
I've always love your personality and that is usually not a genetic attribute but after seeing your parents , I feel this is a really warm house with warm-hearted people . Much love to all of you 😘
What really struck me was that your mom said she knew women who had to have a mastectomy for medical reasons, and that is always the first thing I think of too... I mean that is just a big thing to have a loved one go through. So when you have a loved one who is trans, and the top surgery is a good thing, it may be difficult to switch mindsets. It is why I am watching videos like yours, to teach myself that these surgeries can be very positive things!
Your mum is amazing dude! I'm having a bit of a hard time with my mum since I came out (3 years ago) I feel like she won't actually acknowledge me being trans until I show up at her house with a beard!
Such a wonderfully supportive, sweet, articulate & loving Mum...I didn't expect anything differently though Jamie, because of your own incredibly loving, genuine & endearing personality...God Bless your fortunate Family...
Thank u for having your mom on here it's been helpful for me to understand my husband and family why it's hard to see and call me by Owen . Makes me feel a lot better
I think more parents need to see these videos. I feel like they would help them understand and feel related to by others who have trans children, as I feel it can be a challenge to accept for some parents.
Hey Jamie, your mum sounds really really amazing and supportive all the way and thats so cool to see, i totally love her accent, and also i think youre so attractive! haha, not to make you feel uncomfortable, but youre so cute.. :) and i love your english accent too :) anywaaaaaay, best wishes! x O
Thank you so much for this video. I’m the mom of a trans daughter, and I’m so fully supportive of her. It’s just so hard to reprogram almost 30 years of pronouns, etc., but I’m trying my best.
Saving this video for future reference in case I know someone who could do with a bit more education on the subject. Your mum sounds like a clever, kind person. Everyone's favourite type of person. :) Thank you for sharing this!
Your parents are incredibly wonderful! I'm so happy for you that you can live your life how you feel. Thanks a lot for all your videos. I wished I'd lived the same era...
"I think you look quite striking with your beard and all" I died. 😂 Mom goals.
we already heard it dumb ass
His reaction to her comment was adorable, lol.
I particularly like the comment about pronouns and name: "it wasn't difficult because of resistance but because of habit." and that's very true. My friend only changed name and I kept slipping up so one night I actually sat down, watching a picture of her and I repeated her new name a few dozens times so my brain would stop messing me up.
This is soooo sweet😍
I do a similar thing, when someone tells me they are non binary or trans in my head I just repeat their pronouns
Aww 🥰
I love the fact that your mom had so many concerns - but all of them not being about you changing gender but about your health and what a surgery or the hormones would do, etc. (e. g. if anything could go wrong etc.) That shows just how much love she has for you and I think that's wonderful to see.
Love how honest your mum is! So refreshing to see a mother who actually listens to her child and even admit that yes she may have found it confusing at times. I think that's why lots of people are so mean about transgenders because they just don't understand. Your mother is a great example of what happens when we communicate with each other and listen and learn. Am so happy you had the support of your parents! So nice seeing stuff like this on TH-cam. Buzz feed brought me your story and I think it's wonderful! Also I love your hair! It always looks amazing!
+TheStripeyStudios I'm so grateful for how she (and the rest of my family) handled me being trans, that support makes everything seem easier.
Thank you! :)
“It’s another expression of humankind.” The best words ever put together in history.
Thank you so much for this video. Your mother is warm and absolutely lovely! As the mom of a 19 yo who very recently started transitioning ftm, hearing your Mom's perspective has been extremely helpful. Thanks again!
+Valerie Metcalfe Hey, you're welcome! So glad the video could be of some help. All the best with everything :)
Your mom is very sweet, too! It's cute that she has a LOT to say (all of which I appreciated) while your dad in the other video is like, "yeah, it was fine, that's it." haha.
Wow, she's a wonderful mom! And it's a pleasure to listen to her.
I’m jealous. I told my mom recently that I am ftm. She did not take it very well. My sister was with me(supportive of it) and continued to a different subject. She then called me by my preferred pronouns, he. She then yelled “He? You mean my baby girl --?” She is in denial and it is tearing me up. I’m scared that this will tear us apart. But she is angry and thinks it’s her fault and won’t accept information. I’m depressed and suicidal and I am crying while writing this. You are amazing and I love this channel. But sometimes I need a person to vent to. Well, I have no one. No friends are really comfortable to talk to. No one is there right now. My dad and all of my household are supportive, my friends, but not my moms side of the family. It hurts. And I just want a friend. I needed to vent so I chose you. You are an amazing person. I cannot express the love for you. You’re brave and handsome. But I will never be like that. But I wanted you to know, your videos keep me alive somehow. But it doesn’t matter how, it just does. Seeing you and your family, your transition, your pride. It all hurts me a little, but then gives me hope. Don’t take this as a suicide note, I’m not gonna. But I’m just venting to a person I trust without even knowing them. Thank you for reading this, it means a lot.
Hey there, I am so sorry your mum isn't being supportive. It hurts, it feels like a rejection, it is unfair.
I sincerely hope for your sake that she is just 'in shock' & comes around to being supportive, loving & accepting like you deserve. And you DO deserve love & acceptance!
A lot of folks do come around.
And if she doesn't it isn't a reflection on you.
I know that is hard.
I am cis, female (& old! 41yrs) but when i came out as gay when i was a teenager my mother was hateful. There were other issues too & I ended up independent at a young age.
However my mother did end up accepting my sexuality, was very close to my now exwife and years later my little sister also came out as lesbian and has had nothing but support from her.
People change.
It isn't your responsibility to educate your parents but maybe sending her links to videos like this?
But if she doesn't you have your sister, you dad & his side of the family. Focus on & remind yourself of the support you're getting.
If you need to give yourself space away from people who don't accept you that is ok, it is important for you mental health.
And if you need some mother-type nurturing energy there is a subreddit called r/MomForAMinute. Yeh i know reddit can be toxic but it has it's pockets of kindness & that is one of them. I post on there a bit, giving 'mum acceptance' to folks who need it.
Also you are early on your trans journey? When you see a confident, handsome assured transguy like Jamie remember he is many years ahead of you. He has heaps of videos going back years.
You will bloom! A few years from now you will too be a handsome, dapper cool guy looking back thinking about the worried young bloke he was at the beginning of the journey. You will be proud how far you have come.
Strength, love, kindness & hugs to you, son.
Beth SN thank you so much I am literally crying. I’m going to find that reddit thing. Thank you so much. I was at a really rough point, new seizures, two different infections in my body, and so much more. When my mom didn’t accept me, it broke me after being vulnerable. You made me cry and smile. You’re a good person. :’)
Hey, please dont. Im sure that your mom will realise what shes doing wrong, and im sure that she can change for you. Im glad you have a sister thats supportive.
Aww I hope you're in a much better place now and have found people you can rely on for support!
Wow she really I amazing, top notch mom
Your parents are so lovely and accepting! I've just watched both Q&A videos.
Your mom has the best and strongest accent. I loved it. It's amazing how supportive your mom is and it makes me feel good that your mom makes you feel great.
What an incredible mother you have! She is absolutely lovely and honest and so informative about her point of view with every detail. She is magnificent and this video is so awesome!!
Agree - what an amazing woman Jamie’s mum is - not just as a mother, but as a kind compassionate, intelligent and empathetic person.
And your mum is so beautiful too oh my gosh knowing that she struggled and was confused but always put your feelings first and really wanted to make sure you were okay and really just fully committed to being your mum and ugh I'm choking up you have a beautiful family
Every time I feel like coming out to my mum, I watch this video and it makes me feel like it will be so much easier to tell her. I know she will be accepting, but I also know I'll definitely have to educate her on what being trans really is. I'm so glad you posted this :)
Your mum is great. " just another manifestation of humankind". No better way to describe human life.
Is your Mum from Scotland? I love her accent :D
+19sunheart96 She is! :)
+Jammidodger pure dead brilliant haha i'm scottish too!
+Jammidodger JAMIE IM FROM SCOTLAND
HighFiveTV / HVTV me tooooo
@@Jammidodger were you scared to come out. My mum is very homophobic and I dont associate with my dad.
she is so polite! she looks really proper and kind, like a dame of royalty haha
I had no idea your parents are both Scottish. I’m so blown away by that fact, because I’m trans and from Edinburgh and you are my biggest help ( with your videos) in my transition and finding myself.
This is just so wholesome to find out!
Your mum is absolutely adorable. So glad she's been so supportive during your transition. She and you both are truly inspirations!
is anyone else watching videos like this in order to live vicariously through people who have supportive and tolerant parents?
As a supportive mother of an American transgender FTM adult child, I found comfort in this video. My son recently told me he doesn't want me in his life. Since he came out as bisexual, lesbian, then trans I have been nothing but supportive. Jamie, like your mum I had questions and concerns about the gender dysphoria and what made your feel more male than female. I love my child, boy, girl, gender fluid...etc. I just want him to know that I want to support him and love him for who he truly is. I did my best to share my admiration for his bravery of coming out, educate people in the family about my son's FTM transition. As of last week, my son stated he does not want me to be a part of his life as I was not supportive. HUGE stab in my heart! I am being rejected by my FTM son for being supportive and an ally. Do you know of anyone who is a parent of a transgender young adult who has been rejected by their trans child? I have been a huge supporter of the LGBTQ community my entire life. My parents had several gay friends. Two of them became trans with full surgeries. I also have several friends who are LGBT and love them dearly. As a parent having a gay then trans child, this was easy for me to accept. Like your mum, it takes time to learn the pronouns but the look is easy to accept quickly. However, somewhere on my son's journey, he doesn't see me as being supportive. I not sure what wrong I did by him, but it's enough for him to cut me out of his life. ::Crying:: Do you have any idea what he may be going through during his transition from FTM mentally and emotionally with hormone therapy? I am very worried about him and I want to know how I can be supportive of my son. I miss him so much and I want to help him in his journey. Thank you for listening. Cheers, H
I saw your comment and my heart broke. Just know that things are going to get better. I'm a cis man just trying to learn and I ended up in these videos out of curiosity, so I have neither experience nor advise for you. But you have my full support, be sure that everything is going to be alright.
Hi! I know this comment is old but I saw it and thought I might be able to provide another perspective for you or anyone else that may read this in the future if you’re still in the same situation. I’m not FtM, I’m non binary which falls under the transgender umbrella so while no two transgender people have the same journey, a lot of us will share in similar experiences and feelings.
When it comes to supporting people we love, different people will have different support needs. The key is to be able to listen to what it is they need as an individual. It goes beyond just verbal communication as some people have a hard time being able to put their needs into words. Body language and actions can tell nearly as much as words can, sometimes more. Maybe your son was telling you more about what he needed that you realized and it came off as ignoring?
In my opinion and from my own experiences, it’s best when someone asks what I need for them to be able to truly support me. It’s more than just using the correct pronouns or “oh my parent said they still love me so the other hardships that come with transitioning don’t matter anymore.” That should be the bare minimum. To me, being a parent means unconditional love. Not love in SPITE of my gender, but REGARDLESS of my gender.
So maybe ask yourself what you could’ve done better rather than what you did wrong. Could you have listened better? Could you have put more emphasis on him rather than making it about what YOU did right? Could you have opened your heart and mind better for his choice in partner? Could you have accompanied him to doctors appointments if that’s what he would have liked? Could you have given him more space and time to process things privately? Sometimes reframing things in your mind can help you see things differently, and hindsight is 20/20. If your answers to any of those things (or any others that might apply more to your personal relationship) maybe reach out to him? Apologize for not being there in the way he needed and really mean it. Then maybe he could offer you some more insight. But don’t push anything with him or it could do even more damage to your relationship.
Anyway, I hope maybe this could be helpful to you or anyone. But of course remember that this is just my own perspective and it differs from person to person. I wish both you and your son all the best.
Oh I'm so envious of how accepting your mother is. ;-;
I actually teared up because your mom is so sweet and accepting :') Loved this video
I LOVE this video, Jammi!! What a wonderful person your mum is! Bless your hearts. I'm going to send this to my mom. Started T last night. My mom has been amazing, too, and I don't know what I would have done without her. This will make her feel good, I'm sure. All the best and HAPPY NEW YEAR!
+Earl Cornbread Aw thank you. Congrats on starting T! Hope it's going well for you so far. Happy New Year :)
May or may not be feeling confused about whether I’m trans or not and binging a bunch of Jammidodger’s, NoahFinnce’s, and Sam Collins’s videos to make me feel better because they always do
how lovely is your mum?! I found this video very easy to relate to and more appreciative of my parents who are just as supportive as your mum. nice one!
Dan Wilcockson p
Your mom is just lovely. Thanks for sharing her with us (and to her for sharing her experiences as a parent).
your mom is so lovely! I love how open to dialogue and education you mom was when she didn't understand something.
This video perfectly demonstrated the sweetest love a Mother should have for a child. Unconditional/kind. Your Mum is lovely/loving/eloquent and her accent made the sweetest words.... all the sweeter.
Thank you so much for sharing. :)
Aw wow. I'm so glad I found this gem. I've followed you for a while because I'm the mum of a non-binary teen and really working to do the right things by them. So many times as parents we get the message that unless we get it all "right" immediately we are somehow not supportive or accepting and I think it's really important to know that just because we slip up it's like your mom said...out of habit not malice. We're learning too! Love you and and your family sharing your journey so that those of us just coming through it have some good models. ❤️
Your mom's voice is lovely! It sounds so comforting an soothing, lucky Jammi!
your mum seems lovely. I came out to my parents fairly recently and they just refuse to talk about it
its the opposite for me i think I'm good friends with my parents so like its weird to get personal. I'm sorry your parents are stupid
+MrKalvinC Thanks, it's good to know that people have my back, even if my parents don't
+ThisTinyGlitch I came out to my parents just over a year ago and they still don't talk about it, haha. It's a process, longer than others for some people. Hope they can come around for you soon!
+Jason Clarke I'm sorry, hopefully they accept you soon! I actually had a conversation with them since I posted that, there's still a long way to go but I think they'll come round in the end
I haven't even come out to my parents yet and I'm so scared but I'm here for you too ,you will always have love and support from us
Your mother is awesome! That's a very touching video. I can see all the love between you and it makes me happy.
Loved it! It's brave of you to be yourself. Love from India.
Your Parents seem so supportive and loving. You're a lucky guy :)
Your mother is so kind, so clever ... A great person like you!
Hi James, I just wanted to say I've been watching your videos and I think they're all so fantastic, but your videos with your parents have been my favourites. Your mum and dad are amazing and you are an example of just how happy and healthy a person can be if they are surrounded by love and support. xx
OMG...this just made me cry happy tears...your mom is just so lovely..I love how your parents are so down to earth xx
My 16 yo son came out as trans male 2 months ago. Your Mum validated all my concerns. Thank you for this!
your mother is so incredible and lovely and I hope that she is aware of just how amazing she is. this makes me so happy seeing that you maintained suck a strong relationship with your family. all the love!
I like how all the concerns were about you- I've seen three other situations where people's parents made their kids transition all about them and its so refreshing to see a good parent focused on YOUR happiness and well being.
What an amazing momma you've got! She's so extremely wise and is very soothing to listen to. I wish more people shared her mindset
Jammi, you are so awesome with your mum! You are simply an awesome man and seeing your mum, that makes a lot of sense. I've always been so happy for you, but now seeing you with your loving mum, I am even more happy. Jammi, I am so proud of you and so grateful for the mum you have! And incidentally, you are one handsome dude! ......Ray
I had to watch this a second time. Tell your mom that she is amazing. I admire her and look up to her. Tell her that she could not have done better in this video. Love how well she explained her thoughts and feelings on everything so clearly.
Your mom is fantastic!
The fact that she expressed her real concerns adds to the authenticity of what she says.
You have a terrific family, and you're terrific too! 😊
your mum is clever and kind.
To those who recently came out to their family and friends it will take time. It will take a lot of time for people to get used to the situation. Be understanding I know you've dealt with all this pain about holding your feelings back for years but I promise you eventually you will get to a place of comfort. I got my religious mother to support me almost 2 years after I came out. I had to explain why I need to transition and why I feel the way I do. Communication is everything. Good luck to all of you 💕💕
Such a loving and understanding mother you have, Jamie, you`re so lucky.
this is just phenomenal. pure honesty. it's brilliant to see and hear.
Out of curiosity, having such a supportive mum, since she chose your birth name, did she have any say in chosing the name Jamie?
Also what a lovely honest woman. A true inspiration to parents everywhere.
Your mom is so cute. I appreciate the honesty and openness of this discussion.
this was so heartwarming. i can't even think of another word for it. but just the love and support for you and your life, and everything about it, just made me so emotional. good for her and good for you. glad to see such wonderful people in the world
thats awesome that your mum supports you that much :-) happy for you! My mum takes me to the gender clinics but she doesn't fully support me unfortunately
You have the best parents. They are amazing and so accepting. I love that they both mention that how you felt was more important than how they felt. My mother keeps telling me that I'm "doing this just to hurt me" and that I don't care about how she feels. Why doesn't she consider how it makes me feel?
You are so lucky to have your parents. Treasure them always.
What an amazing woman your mum is, Jamie - not just as a mother, but as a kind compassionate, intelligent and empathetic person.
"I sometimes forget you were ever any different than you are now" Boutta make me cry
Your mum is amazing, she was so thoughtful with her answers, and she would make a great public speaker. Maybe a youtube channel of her own where she can put up her own videos on being the parent of a trans person? May help other families who might not be as supportive as yours? Just a thought!
A very happy 2017 to you and your family xx
Your Mum is one of the most darling people I have ever seen and no doubt is a great person as a parent and friend. Seeing you both do a Q&A video together is so endearing and touching beyond words plus one all parents who have children come out to them should take as a model and learn from. Love and acceptance-that's what parents should show their kids when they want to be open about their sexuality. God bless and keep you both 🥰
I’m so moved Im crying listening to your story and now seeing your mom being so kind and supportive. Really happy seeing your journey and how kind your parents are. All the best Jamie
"Just another experience of humankind."
Your mum is absolutely thee cutest person ever!!!! She's so understanding and educated on the subject. Love her!!!!
I love her! She has such a beautiful voice!
you are blessed. you have a supportive family and friends in your transformation. continue to inspire others.
Parenting done right - seems stupid to even say the obvious but we know that not all parents are this supportive, willing to learn and loving of their trans kids. What a babe she is 🥰
I admire how she puts her child's well-being ahead of her own concerns and hesitation. She was open to discuss and learn about a rare and delicate subject, she listened to her child's thoughts and feelings, she saw the benefits long-term for her child's life. She supported her child in all this turbulent transition phase because she wanted him to have a life and not be ostracized from society. This makes her an example of parent and a point of reference. I wish more parents follow her example and accept their kids' life choices, whether trans or not. Love to all!
WOW!! what a great mom. Such a great person to help you thru your new life and you helping her as well. I love to see such dignity and respect on both sides. 😊😊😊
How fortunate for you having a wonderful mum. Your mum is a sweetheart and a Scottish sweetheart to boot. Excellent video. Bless your mum for doing this.
omg your mum is so sweet. I wish me and my mum had a relationship like this.
Your parents are so amazingly supportive! Thank you for sharing :)
This is such a delight to watch. I hope one day my parents come around to be like yours. Unfortunately it'll probably be a long time until that happens, but in the meantime, it's wonderful to see people who are accepted by their families and friends.
I love how open your mom is about you being transgender and the struggles that come as parent of a transgender child! I also love how you can tell she totally loves you and accepts you as you are!
You and your mommy are both ADORABLE!!! :)
Why would you word it like that!?!?!?!?
Again, "Late to the party", Jammi, your ability to educate the rest of us as to the steps necessary to go from 'who you were to who you are now' is a credit to both you AND your Parents! They are the individuals who created YOU - and through the genetics, all of you came together as 1 family unit.
Thanks to you, I've verbally "adopted" a FTM Son, a wonderful individual I et through work. Your videos opened my eyes as to the Journey Path that it takes to transition into "a New You". Your ability to educate others has given me a Blessing I never envisioned - that is, in my 70 years of My Journey (next week / 8/25) I've received my FIRST "Father's Day Card" from a beautiful young man who accepted "my offer" to 'just be a Dad' - someone who Loves Him and who is there for him, should he need it.
On the 25th, "my Son and his girlfriend" will join my Husband and I for a special celebration; my 70th Birthday, as well as our 26th Anniversary as a Couple (we'll be married 5 years on 9/10/22).
Thanks to you, we're building a new Family with Love and respect for one another!
Many Thanks!
Your mum is correct...you are striking. Absolutely love her.
Thanks so much to your Mum and Dad. What beautiful down to earth people. Your mother was so eloquent and honest. The more we all talk and share the more normalised transgender will become. You and your family are beacons. Thanks again Jamie.
What an amazingly articulate, understanding, loving, supportive mother. You are a very lucky young man.
So good to hear her support of you. Really happy you have her!
I love Mum for being thoughtful and honest. In her heart she was fine. And she still had worries.
Thank you so incredibly much for helping me understand my close loved one who came out a while ago. You have no idea how much you and your family educates and help me being strong for our boy here. 💜
I've always love your personality and that is usually not a genetic attribute but after seeing your parents , I feel this is a really warm house with warm-hearted people .
Much love to all of you 😘
What really struck me was that your mom said she knew women who had to have a mastectomy for medical reasons, and that is always the first thing I think of too... I mean that is just a big thing to have a loved one go through. So when you have a loved one who is trans, and the top surgery is a good thing, it may be difficult to switch mindsets. It is why I am watching videos like yours, to teach myself that these surgeries can be very positive things!
Your mum is amazing dude! I'm having a bit of a hard time with my mum since I came out (3 years ago) I feel like she won't actually acknowledge me being trans until I show up at her house with a beard!
Your mum is so great. she's so respectful in her language. my mum won't be this great :-(
Both your parents have such strong Scottish accents and you don't it confuses me but I genuinely love your parents they're amazing!!
Your Mum is seriously amazing
Such a wonderfully supportive, sweet, articulate & loving Mum...I didn't expect anything differently though Jamie, because of your own incredibly loving, genuine & endearing personality...God Bless your fortunate Family...
Your mom has the most wonderful accent I've ever heard
Your mum is so sweet & lovely. This was so heartwarming. 💜
aww your mother is so lovely
Thank u for having your mom on here it's been helpful for me to understand my husband and family why it's hard to see and call me by Owen . Makes me feel a lot better
I think more parents need to see these videos. I feel like they would help them understand and feel related to by others who have trans children, as I feel it can be a challenge to accept for some parents.
Hey Jamie, your mum sounds really really amazing and supportive all the way and thats so cool to see, i totally love her accent, and also i think youre so attractive! haha, not to make you feel uncomfortable, but youre so cute.. :) and i love your english accent too :) anywaaaaaay, best wishes! x O
Lovely mother. You can see how genuinely they (both your parents) love you!
Thank you so much for this video. I’m the mom of a trans daughter, and I’m so fully supportive of her. It’s just so hard to reprogram almost 30 years of pronouns, etc., but I’m trying my best.
Saving this video for future reference in case I know someone who could do with a bit more education on the subject. Your mum sounds like a clever, kind person. Everyone's favourite type of person. :) Thank you for sharing this!
This is the kind of parent everyone needs. This is the kind of parent everyone should strive to become.
Wow what an amazing accepting mum, you have amazing parents. Thank you mum for loving your child so unconditionally.
Your parents are incredibly wonderful! I'm so happy for you that you can live your life how you feel. Thanks a lot for all your videos. I wished I'd lived the same era...
Im so happy to see that wonderful people like your parents are on this planet !