ADHD and Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD)
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 5 ต.ค. 2024
- Is there a link between ADHD and RSD? I explore how I feel like this stems from emotion Dysregulation, provide examples of when people experience RSD and how I’ve been trying to manage it
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#adhd #adhdawareness #rsd #adhdadult #lego #legos #rejectionsensitivedysphoria
No way this is so underrated!! Like the things in my brain put into words?? I didn’t think that was possible until now!
This made me so happy that I could help and you feel seen 🤗
Thank u for the work u do !!!!! Yes i feel emotions VERY intesely.... one thing that helps me is typing out my feelings & wut upset me before i address the issue. Typing out how i would reply helps me not only validate myself in a tangible way but also helps organize thoughts that r otherwise scattered & left unsaid cuz i get overwhelmed by my gut reaction. Again tho thanks for this vid !!!
Thanks so much I appreciate you! Ahh I will try typing things out I guess it helps with not keeping it all bottled up inside
Thanks for describing RSD more Rach! Don't worry bout not finishing the Legos. It happens.
Thank you! I appreciate it! I might try and finish it for the next video
I was diagnosed with GAD and MDD a while back and then some RSD. The thing that changes the course of healing for me was learning mindfulness meditation, journaling my emotions every day, and learning to set boundaries which I never had (I had zero boundaries, and was just letting other peoples' anxieties and traumas pile on top of my own, ugh). Learning to say "no" without shame has been a great skill. Also, the meditation book "30 Days to Overcome Rejection" by Harper Daniels was a nice small mindfulness guide that I enjoyed.
Thanks for sharing! I’m glad this helps you, Prayer is something that helps me with it
At 58, I've been diagnosed with afhd for a year. Which is good, but I still feel like i don't know how to deal with it. My medication slows my mind, n im not as scatter brained but still feel like im alone and nobody understands. My last relationship i had before diagnosed still kills me today, and it was over 3 years ago. I can't get over of feeling humiliated and stupid to become someone who lost herself and tried to be something so he would be happy and wouldn't leave me ( I had 2 divorces already). That would be enough, etc. When i got diagnosed and did research, I heard what RSD is, and it hit home. But i just can't get my mind away from everything in my past. i did wrong n going forward. I am seeing a counselor, but i figure at 58, I've lived. This was my whole life alteady I'm too late to change. I have no friend or family support. When you do the lego thing while you're doing things like this does it help when you are trying to talk about things that are in your mind but doesn’t seem to be able to come thst way out of your mind so you look like a bumbling idiot trying to get it out? It happens so much when im trying to tell something to someone, then i get more agitated because i cant. Then feel so mad at myself that im so stupid. Does it help? Sorry for long post just to get to that question
Hey Patricia, thank you for being so open to sharing your experience. I’ll try and reply to a few of your points:
ADHD Medication - I’ve been on meds for over 3yrs and went through a titration period of trying out which meds work for me. My meds make me feel motivated and more clear headed. So it might be worth speaking to a Dr to try out different meds.
Relationship/Divorce: So sorry you’ve had to endure that. It’s valid to feel this way - you’re not stupid and It sounds like you’re past partner did not value you for who you were and had their faults. I do hope you find someone that appreciates and pours into you.
Support - I’ve found online adhd communities to help. On Facebook there’s a group called ‘ADHD for smart ass women’ you could try it out and find online and maybe in person communities from there.
Lego - Ha well I like doing multiple things at once so I assume people would find it stimulating watching me try to complete a Lego while talking. I love having things I can fidget with.
Thank you for this helpful video! Learning to say the quiet bit out loud really helps and it manages expectations. It's not easy though!
Wish I could stop having kittens working up the courage! 😂❤
Thanks for watching! Its soooo difficult but you’ll get there someday I’m sure
@@AdultingADHD can your next video be about ADHD and dating cos boooooooiiii..... 😂
I just want to say thank you so much for this. I won't go into my life story, but this vivid description has given me so much more direction on what to do with my feelings, just by putting a name to it and explaining ways to process the feelings and help yourself through it (without adding immense shame on top). Thank you for doing that work bc I may never have gotten to it in my lifetime, lol. Seriously -- thank you.
Hey Dana! I’m so glad the video resonated with you! It can feel so tough especially feeling misunderstood. Sending love and light your way! I appreciate you
These are all interchangeable:
RSD = Social anxiety = Emotional Dysregulation = Complex Trauma = Toxic shame = After-effects of ACoA & ACE = After-effects of narcissistic abuse, emotional abuse, psychological abuse, mental abuse = Hypervigilance/hypovigilance = PureOCD = Unfavorable power dynamics
I don't like the explanation of RSD being turned into hallucination and over-reaction and that other person re-assure us that we understood them wrong.
What happens when the abuse is real? When someone hates us, hates everybody - when their abuse is real?
This is not covered in CBT at all. We are all suppose to be told like little 5yo children with condescending and patronizing explanations that we over-react. That oversimplified explanation by CBT is simply not true in 90% of cases.
In majority of cases RSD is based on real abuse, unfair treatment and unfavorable power dynamics such as narcissistic abuse.
In real life people really lose their jobs just because they are different and because they are authentic and true and real and they don't put fake mask. In real life people are mobbed and really abused by others simply because they are not neurotypical.
Explanation that we internalize imaginary comments is really condescending and unfair and it is abusive. Victim shaming and victim blaming.
In real life when we ask more details by rude boss and colleagues - this is met with abuse and rancour almost always.
This happens because a lot of people are narcissistic. This means they live in delusional world where any kind of criticism hurts them - and they cure this exposure of their incompetence by being rude to people and gaslighting them that others are over-sensitive.
CBT is therapy of ableism.
I have no idea why ADHD-ers turn to CBT. This is the same as if a Jew would go into pre1945 Nazi HQ in Berlin to ask information about Human rights. CBT is based on weaponizing psychology to make pharma mafia rich. Complex Trauma is banned by CBT and DSM - because American medical corporations would not make profit if traumatized victims of abuse would actually get healed and told the truth about what has happened to them.
CBT will never validate our feelings and emotions - it will gaslight us into explanation that we are abnormal and sick for being abused, and that toxic people do not exist, that we invent them in our heads. CBT ought to be banned, it is horrible criminal therapy doing incredible psychological damage to anyone seeking genuine help relating to abuse.
When you tell someone to calm down - there's a Power Dynamic that's implied. “I, partner, am calm and have everything under control, and you, someone with ADHD are whacked”. That will not bode well for productive conversation.
🟥Sharon Saline, PsyD
Defend Survivors, TWITTER:
Survivors don’t need anyone else telling them what the ‘should do’ or ‘have to do’ to heal. The last thing they need is someone else trying to control them again. Survivors need to know they are in control and that they are the experts in their experience and healing.
Defend Survivors, TWITTER:
There are so many “positive” messages that are aimed to inspire and help survivors. But when you really listen to these messages, they often guilt or blame survivors for either how they responded to the abuse, or for how they are healing now.
Make sure the messages you share with survivors are honoring and respecting them, their courage, and their choices.
Even with label ADHD, so many of us believe we should be able to just tough it out if we use enough willpower. This is one of the big myths of our society: “is that anybody can convince their brain to do anything of they just try hard enough”.
"ADHD, Self-Esteem, and Rejection Sensitivity Dysphoria"