hang in there, girl. this is the hard part - it gets worse before it gets better - but slowly, slowly, but surely - it gets better. and so does your life. cheering for you, and sending all the strength and love.
Recovery is crap. I was mentally, physically and emotionally wiped out & wanted to give up. I'm so glad I kept going....it also made me realise how shit it was during restricting. I obviously was in denial then. I only used to get about 2 hours of sleep a night if I was lucky, I got out breathe going up stairs, I had no life, no friends, my days & nights were worrying about what I could eat or not eat, when I could eat. I spent most of the day having to lay down as I had no energy but still told everyone there was nothing wrong with me. I feel sad looking back now....what a total waste of years/life.
Hearing you being so honest about missing being smaller really resonated with me. Its something often isnt said out loud because its a feeling you’shouldnt’ have. But acknowledging it felt so validating
The only way out is through… it’s easy to remember the “good things” about being sick but they do not exist in isolation from the awful things. A REALLY great book is “The Wisdom of Your Body” by Hillary McBride. ❤❤❤❤❤ Keep on going. It’s better on the other side. There is life there. Real life.
as someone in the same boat, you are doing amazing. I too am at the highest weight ever and know i need to gain more and so be it! yes i am also at the stage where i could turn back or stick it out, and if we stick it out we will find recovery. i think its so beautiful how you have just moved house because in a way it represents ur recovery journey, how u are now moving into a new house (your healing body) and its scary and new but that's where you find the beauty you would've missed if you stayed in the old house. keep going because this may be the top of the hill, and once you get there you will be able to see how much you deserve all the joy and peace that recovery brings :)
I think recovery is a different kind of hard and low feeling. Eating disorders are a addiction and although they want pull us back in and not want us to do recovery and try make us think our ed life was all good we must not forget really how crappy and low they can make us feel and make our lives. I know my eating disorder made me incredibly depressed and anxious and obsessive. Recovery is hard but is very worth it. I'm 3/4 recovered I'd say and life is waaayy much better now. Hope that makes sense. Keep going it's well worth it!!
In my experience the quote, the darkest night is just before dawn, is very applicable to recovery, so don't give up as it gets harder,it means you're getting closer. The time i was closest to giving up because i thought i couldn't tolerate the weight gain any more was actually when i reached my set point. Except it's only 6months later that i knew it was my set point as my weight hasn't really changed during that time. But if I'd given up then, I would never have known that my body was so close. Obviously recovery isn't just about weight restoration and there are still things I'm working on but i do really think the worst is behind me now and i can see the endpoint.
That debunking rule/action video sounds really good. I like to think that I'm a logical, rational person but if I said what my ed thoughts were out loud to someone they'd definitely look at me like wtf 🤨
Here for you💓 a house tour or chat about equine therapy would be an amazing vid if you need to take your mind off of the eating for a little while. Distractions are sometimes such a great respite. Here for the food challenges also!🥰 keep on going. You’re doing amazing 🫶🫶
I wanted to be tiny from age 14 to 36. I asked my shrink how to cope. I was put on a legal plan tht I had to be a healthy weight. If it dropped. Then I'd have to go to hospital. With no choice for 2 yrs I kept my weight normal all alone ! After 2 yrs. I was making so much of a life for myself I never ever ever wanted to go back!!! I loved food,job,$$ for fun things and make-up and cloths ans travel,friends,family,hobbies! My life was filled with fun! And I love my curves I got used to it!!!!. It was alot of tears the first 13 months. But then I let go completely!!😂🎉😢😮😅❤
hang in there, girl. this is the hard part - it gets worse before it gets better - but slowly, slowly, but surely - it gets better. and so does your life. cheering for you, and sending all the strength and love.
Recovery is crap.
I was mentally, physically and emotionally wiped out & wanted to give up.
I'm so glad I kept going....it also made me realise how shit it was during restricting. I obviously was in denial then. I only used to get about 2 hours of sleep a night if I was lucky, I got out breathe going up stairs, I had no life, no friends, my days & nights were worrying about what I could eat or not eat, when I could eat. I spent most of the day having to lay down as I had no energy but still told everyone there was nothing wrong with me. I feel sad looking back now....what a total waste of years/life.
Hearing you being so honest about missing being smaller really resonated with me. Its something often isnt said out loud because its a feeling you’shouldnt’ have. But acknowledging it felt so validating
The only way out is through… it’s easy to remember the “good things” about being sick but they do not exist in isolation from the awful things. A REALLY great book is “The Wisdom of Your Body” by Hillary McBride. ❤❤❤❤❤
Keep on going. It’s better on the other side. There is life there. Real life.
as someone in the same boat, you are doing amazing.
I too am at the highest weight ever and know i need to gain more and so be it! yes i am also at the stage where i could turn back or stick it out, and if we stick it out we will find recovery.
i think its so beautiful how you have just moved house because in a way it represents ur recovery journey, how u are now moving into a new house (your healing body) and its scary and new but that's where you find the beauty you would've missed if you stayed in the old house. keep going because this may be the top of the hill, and once you get there you will be able to see how much you deserve all the joy and peace that recovery brings :)
💛💛💛
I think recovery is a different kind of hard and low feeling. Eating disorders are a addiction and although they want pull us back in and not want us to do recovery and try make us think our ed life was all good we must not forget really how crappy and low they can make us feel and make our lives. I know my eating disorder made me incredibly depressed and anxious and obsessive. Recovery is hard but is very worth it. I'm 3/4 recovered I'd say and life is waaayy much better now. Hope that makes sense.
Keep going it's well worth it!!
Sending you love from Texas
In my experience the quote, the darkest night is just before dawn, is very applicable to recovery, so don't give up as it gets harder,it means you're getting closer. The time i was closest to giving up because i thought i couldn't tolerate the weight gain any more was actually when i reached my set point. Except it's only 6months later that i knew it was my set point as my weight hasn't really changed during that time. But if I'd given up then, I would never have known that my body was so close. Obviously recovery isn't just about weight restoration and there are still things I'm working on but i do really think the worst is behind me now and i can see the endpoint.
That debunking rule/action video sounds really good. I like to think that I'm a logical, rational person but if I said what my ed thoughts were out loud to someone they'd definitely look at me like wtf 🤨
I am in the same situation! I l understand everything you Talk about! You are beautiful, yes recovery is hard!!! We can do hard things together 💛
Here for you💓 a house tour or chat about equine therapy would be an amazing vid if you need to take your mind off of the eating for a little while. Distractions are sometimes such a great respite.
Here for the food challenges also!🥰 keep on going. You’re doing amazing 🫶🫶
Thank you for your honesty and vulnerability xxxx
FDOE would be fine! Much love❤
Wishing you the best and much strength ❤❤
Love all the video ideas, for next week challenging ed rules would be so nice😁
You are so friggin’ strong! 🫶🏼
I wanted to be tiny from age 14 to 36. I asked my shrink how to cope. I was put on a legal plan tht I had to be a healthy weight. If it dropped. Then I'd have to go to hospital. With no choice for 2 yrs I kept my weight normal all alone ! After 2 yrs. I was making so much of a life for myself I never ever ever wanted to go back!!! I loved food,job,$$ for fun things and make-up and cloths ans travel,friends,family,hobbies! My life was filled with fun! And I love my curves I got used to it!!!!. It was alot of tears the first 13 months. But then I let go completely!!😂🎉😢😮😅❤
❤
Anorexia is not a weight anorexia is in the 🧠 ❤
you look beautiful in your sunflower dress 💛
I could see her genuine smile from thinking of “new challenge” idk if she even noticed it but it moved me🥹💗