It is so true.. I'm glad to have an INTP partners at my workplace and she always be my fkin best friend for ever.. As l am INFJ ,l always do and try to search on every meaning of their memes and love to read their research too..
Omg I love research. I rarely ever so it when I'm talking to people though. I'd rather just ask them. I've had a lot of people tell me they google stuff while we are talking
@@N-A762 I hope you understand though that you running around calling people insufferable may be worse to them. No need to be so condescending for no reason when someone is just expressing that they wish to be understood more often.
@@danw91 It doesn't stop at that for most people. We are at a point where everyone wants to take flaws and make it a part of there personality instead of working on themselves. Its not being understood it is being enabled.
?? I am never reluctant, I am just not interested in things they expect from me, while being very agitated about things I am interested in. Yet this would be true with most P-s.
Lmao, I am intp and Ive never felt so called out by a video. Im an atheist, I kinda hate humanity, emotions, ILLOGIC (cant stand irrationality, if you contradict yourself, like he said in the video, and especially during an argument, I will jump down your throat and not let go). My mother used to call me her little vulcano cause Id keep all my emotions bottled up untill Id explode. And thats only the first minute of the video.
My best friend is INTP and it's so funny when I tell him I get pizza and he can just stay where he is. His face becomes the happiest in the world, like a little child! "Oh someone cares about me, no need for movement... :) "
All the men in my immediate family are INTPs. Obviously, my father is dating (and I have no idea how his girlfriend puts up with him) but my little brother and I are lost causes.
While I get what you are going for, I must slightly disagree. When I meet someone that I find physically attractive, I immediately start observing and analyzing their thoughts/words and behaviors for compatibility. This is a cognitive behavior, not an emotional one. There is an immediate and ongoing assessment for the potential for a relationship. While that is, to your point, not a relationship itself, the relationship that might come out of it is not based on a “romantic interest”. It is based on meeting relationship criteria. So you are, in fact, looking for and hopefully ‘finding’ a relationship.
'Not a robot, just a reluctant human' is the best, most concise description of me I've ever heard, for so many reasons. Thank you for this! Also, I've very happy alone, but still clicked here immediately lol
I am an INTP in relationship with an ISTJ. He thinks he is very logical but oh boy... he does not see the 6000+ other aspects and dimensions of logic and I just can not explain it to him. But he looks after me which is really nice and honestly I really need it. The weird thing is that everibody say that INTPs are the robots but I actually think that my ISTJ is waaay more robotic than me. Sometimes I feel I am hippie compare to him.
I dated an ISTJ once, and I can relate to this. He definitely cared a lot about me and didn't like to see how much of a mess I was. We were both extremely logical, but he wasn't a rule-breaker in any way and that often bothered me. Not to mention how he got better grades than me while I thought I was smarter, leading to my resentment. I'm glad I've matured since then; I don't think INTPs and ISTJs are incompatible but their immature versions will have difficulties.
No no, you're right. INTP's aren’t the most robotic type. I’m definitely an XNTP and I cry a lot and write a lot of songs about my feelings. I'm not an INFP, but saying INTP's are robotic is a stereotype. I think that ESTP's are pretty robotic sometimes
For me ESTP often pretend to be emotional while actually not caring which I can in a sense see as robotic, and they see every mistake instantly like scanning machine it's scary. But boy, they are Illogical, their lack of (real) common sense infuriates me
I believe it. I used to have an ISTJ coworker who acted like a robot. Ate lunch with a stop watch for 30 minutes to the second! She would only speak to coworkers if she was on the clock. So if work started at 9am she would not speak to you at 8:57am. Very rude in my opinion. We'd call her Robotron behind her back 😆
(INTP) when i try to explain to my friends that "the most sexy thing about a woman" is if that hypothetical woman finds a logical mistake or fallacy in my argument/statement and corrects me on it they just have this "?_?" look on their face. in an ideal scenario she is an expert in a certain field and can nerd out about it for hours. there is nothing more vitalizing than learning new stuff and meet smart(er) persons. i find it to be extremly weird that many people dont call you out because of some arbitrary politeness reason....
I'm an INTP dating an INFJ. Well she take care of me, She make me feel special, She hear me out and understand things from perspective whenever I throw random logical theories towards her and better she contradict my theory and boom we're in a logical debate and we both love that shit. Sometimes she gets mad so I understand the situation and hear her out, And sometimes when I feel overwhelmed and start speaking shit out ( Emotional response to be precise ) she hears me out and empathize with me, I mostly be aware about that I'm acting emotionally and get the hang of situation as fast I could... But she understands just everything and never blames things on me, She always loves me the same knowing the things I mostly talk are shit, She never calls me weird, She understand me better than anyone ever did... She's surely a blessing for me!
Yes, I found INFJs to be a good match due to their nearly supernatural ability to read people, understand their feelings more than these people often can themselves. I really appreciate how I don't even have to say much and they "get it" and help me sort out this mess. Something I think an INTP can offer in return, that I do, is opening up them to different perspectives, point of views. I have noticed they can get locked into some narrow ones, and ruminate endlessly about something and get very pessimistic, especially when it comes to conflicts with people, their self worth etc. and be p much the least judgemental out of all types. They know I won't lie and keep a database of what they do, I mull over situations that distress them calmly and basically untie that knot, because that's what INTPs are best at. Multiple solutions and not insisting they do X, this is their choice but I am showing them exits from that maze and a wider world beyond, while they help me navigate my own internal world and how to deal with people's emotions. Plus I think they so appreciate this adventurous side to INTPs, we don't do that this often but I can find myself sometimes doing random fun thing spontaneously and I always saw them have fun when taken along on the ride, just a bit out of their comfort zone, a moment to feel careless. That that is more for friends and family. When it comes to a relationship, strong F types make me feel like I'm walking on eggshells at some point and that's too exhausting. But I'd met someone lately that is just slightly on the F side and I must say this is a really healthy relationship, although maybe because its nature is "more than friends" but not actually dating. Maybe that takes the pressure off? Idk it is comfortable and whatever it is and becomes, I really wish for it to last.
It isn't logically sound to knowingly enter into a relationship with one of us INTP, so from the very beginning, we are already disappointed in our partner's decision making skills.
God this is so me, I'm so dissapointed with how actually could my friend (who has repeatedly said he loves me) even likes me, I'm like seriously u like me even though i have shown you my true face, even though i have repeatedly told you not to like you still like me. (to be honest it was quite flattering in the intial years, but after that he is just some one who cares about me but also super annoying. Honestly i have just become so dependent on him that now i don't evzn function properly without him, and i still don't like him ughhh. I always feel terrible that he is stuck with me :( .this is just so terrible and this eats me away all the time. Thanks for reading this, i know I'm a terrible person.
@@thesilentvoice3397 Do you find his kindness to you annoying because he has an agenda of making you fall in love with him? He has openly declared his intentions which is quite noble, so not a guy who is exploiting the friend zone. He always wanted you to be his lover. Maybe you should just try doing some kind things for him as an attempt to try and restore the balance, maybe bake some cookies? A side effect of doing so might make you fall in love with him. Alternatively, maybe just give the guy some wild sex and see how that changes things? Afterwards, you can always say "yeah… nah, doesn't work for me, but I tried". Just make sure it's wild with him in a dominant role, that's really important. Sounds like he has put in the effort and is probably a genuinely nice guy, and it's not prostituting yourself, because it's an experiment. It only needs to be done one time, then you won't ever need to feel guilty. I was joking at first, but I convinced myself that this is probably the best course of action, and now I actually think you should give it a go. Just fully submit yourself and see how much of a nice guy he truly is? What do you think?
@@wormalism yeah he is a nice guy that i can surely say after observing him. And i have tried both trying to fall for him or just making him disgusted with me so that he will lose interest in me both didn't work, i didn't fall for him and he wasn't disgusted with me. At this point we actually live in hostels ,he is a physics major and I'm maths so we can't spend much time together but I'm heavily dependend on him, like he will call me so we go to canteen together to eat if he doesn't call i just forget about food, he reminds me of assignments and tests and also that my grades are really bad this i need to study more stuff like that. So yeah he isn't someone i deserve but i just can't push him away cause as u can see he is very much needed for me function. But i don't love him at all, i have no interest in what he is doing, he doesn't stimulate me intellectually at all infact when we r together he just tries to cuddle with me (sometimes this is fine but i hate wasting time like this) like our time together is so bland that i don't evzn have any impression of it. Also about the sex part i don't really care about sex ,but i also don't wanna get in trouble (i belong to a strictly religious family so i can't really do away with my virginity ya know). I mean I'm just scared if someday this would create a mess, thats why i don't wanna do it. Maybe it's cause I'm probably asexual ,i don't really think about sex and on side note it disgusts me (I'm slightly mysophobic). I'm just so done with relationships, I'm probably gonna stay single my whole life when This one ends.
@@thesilentvoice3397 I would like to talk to you on a private channel. I am quite concerned about you. You sound like you are in despair. This sounds like you are in a really bad situation.
I don't know why, but as a female INTP, I usually find myself being attracted to INFP and ENTP men. The idealism and cuteness of INFPs just fascinate me, and I really like the ENTP's way of thinking and sarcasm.
Oh yes! ENTPs are very fun to have discussions with!! The only ones that are not afraid to discuss any topic, no matter how "feelsy" other ppl feel about it, how controversial, and it's a very fun game to just dig insanely deep into everything, mutually correcting each other's logical inconsistencies and knowing we are fine with it. It's very intellectually fulfilling and I appreciate the push they give to be a bit more social and confident! INFPs are hit and miss for me, they are comfy to be around with but I eventually feel a bit too clumsy with their feelings and like I might be hurting them no matter how hard I try to be careful.
Though ISFP might seem out of reach, circumstances throw in that scenario. Depicted in, What Women Want/ 27 dresses/ Ugly Truth/ Jane Eyre to name a few..
INTP + INFJ is a great match IMO. Personally, I seem to get along best with INFJs, but if Socionics has any credence, perhaps the feeling is not always mutual lol. INTPs are more the beneficiaries. I've never heard many complaints from INFJs, but maybe they are just being polite and biting their tongue.
@@heatherbryant4197 I will take note of that🤔 I like intp , but I feel tired thinking that I might have to become the mom “ setting orders” which I don’t want to be. I hate making myself Bossy. And I already don’t like doing chores but then I have to push another person to share it😅 like having another son.
ENTJ dating an INTP. We’re both mature, healthy versions of our types. That definitely helps. If we had more of the stereotypes then it’d be much more difficult.
INTP here currently dating an ENFP. She's been pretty patient with me, but I am just so terribly awkward. I feel like a robot constantly short circuiting around her. She's much more touchy and flirty which makes me feel even more awkward, and she can talk endlessly about actresses and musicals I know nothing about. This is perfectly fine with me though because she doesn't really expect me to contribute to that conversation much. I listen, but I can usually expend most of my mental energy on something more interesting to me (like video games) while she rants. We play Stardew Valley together. Update: We broke up. She was too clingy for me.
Also an INTP dating an ENFP. I find that the one thing that makes this kind of pairing work really is patience. Oftentimes when my SO gets overwhelmed with her work, logic-ing her problems isn’t always the best approach and just letting her rant and just being there to listen and affirm that she’s doing a good job is the best way to go about it. Then dropping the logical approach to handling it once she’s calmed down. Similarly when I’m stressed out she’s there to standby and be patient with me letting me just extrapolate things to their logical extremes then she comes in and gives me a hug after it to cap off the stress release. On the flip side what keeps things interesting is the creativity. ENFP’s are really creative especially with all their ideas which really tickles my Si. And when I go and talk to her about some abstract but logical topics she’s really intrigued and more often than not I’ve heard her saying: “I love it when you talk smart”.
"A relationship is essentially two people who mutually agreed to put up with each other's bulls it." One of the best definitions for a relationship I've encountered in a while.
I think one of the main characteristics of an INTP in a relationship is that we can be extremely understanding. Even if the other person wronged me or made a mistake, I can almost always understand why, or at least I know that there are many possible reasons why this could have happened, and it doesn't necessarily mean that the other person doesn't care. The problem is, that many people abuse this. Maybe not even intentionally, but they can get too comfortable relying on the INTP's being understanding. Maybe it is the combination of seeing all the possibilities and suppressing our own emotions. If you don't take your emotions into account when making a decision, why would other people do it?
There are wolves that target INTPs to control, "the goose that layer the golden egg". If they can't control you, they must "break you". Research ISFs. They start out as loyal friends then relationship can grow or stay friends for life.
I’m an INTP, very happily married to an INTJ for the last 7 years. I think having someone with the same passion for abstract thinking, but also thinks in a different way, is a huge advantage. We can challenge each other without anyone getting too hung up on offending/being offended. I also think it helps to have someone who is a “J” ... decisions need to be made, and I’d rather by the advisor than the decider.
Where do I find an INTP woman ? Also, it's not exactly the "J" letter in the INTJ that's doing the magic. Watch this: th-cam.com/video/0rhxGnzE5Ng/w-d-xo.html
It doesn't help that the INTJ's and ENTJ's as the most compatible with INTP are the 2nd and 3rd most rare personality types. Just under 4% of people in the population combined.
I'm an INTJ witn an INTP husband and its been wonderful. We've known each other for 13 years but have been together for almost 4. I would also have to agree that we have similar dynamics to yours and hands down, we are happily stuck with each other for life and the great beyond😂
Honestly being an INTP in regards to relationship is craving a deep intellectual connection but getting bored of a person once you figure them out. Edit: I appreciate all of you guys, really, but I wasn't complaining and certainly not asking for dating advice XD
@@conallomahoney9311 That's a very fair point - it's not the best, but I would rather face that I think this way than dodge it. It's now a negative perspective I can shift.
@Celty Sturluson Yeh it almost always is temporary. I think it's the equivalent of the waning honeymoon period. With the right attitude, it's not a bad thing, and it just evolves into something else.
I'm an INTP and your point about grocery shopping is interesting; until I had kids, primarily when I was single, the only way I could keep food stocked was if I just bought a bunch of crap and threw it in the fridge. I would just go to the grocery store and bought whatever was on my mind and if I ran out, I was sort of stuck, it would take everything to get me to go back to buy more food. I'd rather go get take out. When I had kids, that all changed -- now I'm compulsively set to having a set menu and list to buy -- I hate being responsible for it, but I insist on it. On those occasions when I'm alone again though, I go back to my natural tendencies. I think, at least for myself, a relatively self-aware mature INTP and cognizant of weaknesses, I do my best to stick to my commitments and responsibilties, and I find the logical approach is that of a list and a routine, sometimes, even if it's not the most comfortable thing for me to do. That said, I think calling INTPs comforts in a "routine" is a little...too precise. At least in my case, it's not so much a routine as much as a "mode". . It's more like -- having a set time of "energy and motivation" to do "things", rather than a committed time to do a specific task. I actually have trouble sticking to a routine, and as soon as I'm in one, if I break it, it's hard for me to go back. An example of this is exercise. For my job (and overall health), I have to keep fit, so I try to exercise every day with a set "routine" which is dependent on my work, weather, and life schedule on top of motivation, so rarely it's at a time I really want to do it and it takes an amazing amount of willpower to force myself to commit to that routine. If I take a day off or go on vacation, it's usually enough to knock me out of my routine and I find it really hard to funnel my energy back into getting on track.
Totally resonate with all this... like the language of “mode” - I rarely schedule things for specific times, and doubt it looks like I follow a prescriptive routine every day, but I know what my responsibilities are and how I’ll get them done. If I get asked to do a random thing without much time to contemplate and decide... FEELINGS. Many, many unwanted feelings.
@@kathleenpage2758 "If I get asked to do a random thing without much time to contemplate and decide... FEELINGS. Many, many unwanted feelings." -- in the capacity to which I work now, this is my bane of my existence; it's the worst part of bureaucracy. I think another part of this video, while not entirely incorrect, might be mis-characterized. I think as an INTP, it's true that I dislike doing common maintenance, chores; it's not that I don't see that they need to be done nor is it that I think I need someone to "take care of me" as Nathan puts it in this video (that might be true for some, of course) but that I don't want them to interfere with what is currently consuming my attention and, and therefore, hate the imposition of dealing with them on me. I know this has a point of contention with relationships I've had in the past -- especially if they're on ambiguous, open ended terms like "clean the house" -- I prefer to have it specified, delegated, and left up to me to when to take care of them. I know it sounds incredibly selfish but I think anyone in a relationship with someone like me might learn that it's easier to get things done in a mutually accepted manner if they're specified, enumerated, and delegated within a time frame that doesn't interfere in their mode of productivity and comfort -- even if it it is incremental. When I was younger, I served in the military and while it might seem an unlikely vocation for an INTP, there was a level of comfort that I enjoyed with having these kinds of tasks delegated and specified in a manner where the decision making process was taken out of my hands -- when it became uncomfortable was when the real work was done and I was told that we needed to be "gainfully employed" which, to me, meant meandering and doing bullshit (or otherwise, make myself disappear). Conversely, I once had a civilian job that when I got hired, the president of the company said "we don't want you to work all day, we'd be happy if you got all of your work done in your first few hours of the day and spent the rest of the day throwing pencils into the ceiling". Until that changed, it was the best job I ever had -- it wasn't that I was throwing pencils into the ceiling when I was done, it meant that I could get the awful stuff out of the way and spend the rest of the day doing the stuff I liked to do in a productive manner.
I spent 6 months eating nothing but chicken flavored crackers. Because I didn't want to wash dishes. My dishes were clean. I often said that I was too lazy to make a mess. ~INTP
Infp in a relationship with and intp when you said you used to go to the store and just buy whatever in the moment lol he knew I needed milk but he also showed up with: flowers, me and this kids favorite flavored waters, a huge box of ice cream bars, and a chocolate bunny for each of the kids 😭❤❤❤ as an infp the random variety was hilarious but the fact that each item was purposed in such a sweet way and that he made mental notes of what we needed or like…AND the fact that I didn’t ask him to bring milk but he did it anyway… He’s the one❤ (intuitively however I knew this from our first date when our hands fit perfectly together. Sounds cheesy but it was a “moment”❤)
I'm an INTP and my wife is ESFJ. I have to say it is extremely convenient being with someone who is willing to take care of groceries, bills, all that mundane crap. Its important though that I make up for it in my own way and that I show appreciation. The showing appreciation part is something I have always struggled with, at least in past years. I've always just thought it was obvious that I appreciate it, lol.
I am talking to an esfj but am reluctant on paper. She is good and seems to be interested in having logical convos, but I am not sure what is real and what is a front because she likes me. But this is something I've always struggled with do is there any advice
This is cool. My wife is an ISFJ-T and I’m an INTP-T. We get along extremely well. Funny that you made that mention about how INTPs typically don’t believe in God. I was actually a pretty rooted atheist before I became a Christian. Now I love 3 things outside of my God and Wife. I love Theology, Philosophy, and Psychology. Those interest me far greater than innovations.
I found it funny that you mentioned that ISFJ pairs particularly well with INTP. As an INTP myself, one that has been dating an ISFJ, it has been the single hardest relationship that have ever been in. It certainly has its values (as with any relationship) but a defining characteristic about it is that we are opposites in every single way except for the introverted part BUT, as ISFJs are known to be the "helper" type that puts others before themselves so much that they can have trouble honoring their own time, Even this seems like we are opposites (as if I am an introvert and she is actually an extrovert). What's more, I've realized that the "N" function (i.e. viewing the world with theories, imagination, and concepts) is very much how I derive energy and satisfaction. Being with someone that sees this as useless rambling about things that don't actually exist is extremely difficult. I will admit though, being with someone that has the "J" function is a nice contrast to my disorderliness. But even then, I sometimes have to work with the insecurity of feeling like I need some kind of caretaker. The relationship has definitely been a valuable learning experience.
In retrospect the INTP/ISFJ combo might not have been the best one to cite as an example. It's really fascinating to hear your thoughts on this! ~ Nathan
@@lovewho I'm an INTP and my boyfriend is ISFJ. It's hard for me to understand his overly affectionate expressive love though he completely understands how and what i feel as we both know I'm 100% genuine. I'm currently having a lot of conversations to understand him more and more and the journey is beautiful
@@lovewho thanks Nathan. I do think that this particular pair had A LOT of positivity to learn from each other though. My experience was, at times, extremely rewarding, since I would expand her openness to outside-the-box thinking (as confirmed by her), and she would expand my capacity to lead first with empathy and put problem-solving aside. But...it was also extremely painful at times because we would sometimes be stretched to our limits.
My INTP daughter is seriously dating a man who appears to be an ISTP. It appears they will be eloping at any moment. Haha! I never saw her forge an alliance like this before. Very amusing and they seem so happy.
No one will understand the strong attraction in this combo from outside looking in, but can confirm from my own experience, it is long lasting and intense union in a very low-key way.
@@jooyeonhuh8242 INTP with ISTP dad. We are just cute dorks, when we find something interesting to talk about or figure out. He obviously has a more hands-on/practical approach, and I a more abstract one, so the available points of view are nearly endless. :) Also being Fe out inferior function makes it possible for us to ignore feelings altogether. We know we love each other, and that's plenty for us, you don't have to say it out loud.
I see it as one of the best combinations. There might be some contradictions here and there but it's life it happens but they will be able to fight it because of similarity in thinking. And when they need their alone time she would do her Ne stuff and he - his Se . He might have cool sense of humour. My neighbour was in i s t p, she still is, she's just not my neighbour anymore, and we have had amazing time together. Her isfj mother said that we are weird but we were good together. Personally I think it has a potential to last forever.
I’m ENFJ and my mentor is INTP. He is constantly correcting my thinking and he’s right 99% of the time. That lead Fe exhausts me and I welcome any help exercising logic. The longer I know him, the more I grow as a person. I’m grateful.
@@Roqjoru I tested ENFJ at college in the late ‘’80’s, by certified MBTI people, and by Dave & Shan with OP. I even asked the people that know me best and for 10-30+ years to describe my weak areas and have that to Dave & Shan. You can rest assured, I’m ENFJ.
I'm an INTP with an ENTJ girlfriend. We fit each other really well honestly but sometimes it's like her logic is backwards compared to mines and we're both right in some kinda way but are both too stubborn to say it. And something about her snarky attitude is just appealing but she also has very deep feelings that I sometimes never detect or don't take seriously until it's too late. 😅Also she's always getting up much earlier than me and making schedules for her schedules while I just kinda improvise and go with it until I have time to do me lol.
I'm an INTP and ISFJs for me are among the most unlikely to partner up with. My mother is an ISFJ: I perceive her as being extremely controlling & we have no common interests to talk about. A Type I do tend to get along with well & could imagine a relationship with is the ESFP: not controlling, but down to earth, sensitive & capable of dragging you outside to do things - just what I need!
As an INFJ I'm 50/50 on attraction to INTPs. Sometimes I'm crazy about them and other times I get annoyed with their lack of caring or feeling. I almost always find myself attracted to ENTPs though. My sis who is INTJ is dating an INTP and they seem pretty happy together.
I'd venture to say that often INTPs do care, but they either don't realize it or would rather die than let you see their weakness lol. We are not so great at expressing it even when we try. I've often had the experience of being taken aback by partners assuming I don't care about them. But unless they're vulnerable first and give me room to feel safe reciprocating, I probably won't. Part of why I love INFJs is that they often seem to know how I feel without me having to say anything, and they are good at revealing just enough to make you comfortable opening up.
In my experience as an INTP, I have lots of feelings but people don't take me seriously. Like they don't believe I'm going through something because I explain myself rather than crying or yelling. I get neglected and taken for granted and then people wonder why I have low sympathy. People rarely have sympathy for me, but they expect me to show sympathy for them. This is not with everyone mind you. It's just some people that I have real difficulty communicating with, and vice-versa. I like INFJs generally but the ones in my life are prone to projecting meaning onto words and actions that aren't there sometimes. I get mad when people try and put words in my mouth. But I usually get along pretty well with that type.
interestingly, my girlfriend and i are both INTPs. our relationship is long-distance, though, so that cuts out the factors of having to go buy groceries, or even necessarily having super emotional conversations. we both function perfectly well on our own, but it's nice when we just come together and chat and spend time together. i actually think it has worked out super well - i know a lot of people say that LDRs are a terrible idea and never work out, but as people who are introverted and need a lot of alone time, this lifestyle works super well. when we hang out or talk, it's because we want to. both of us are engaged in what we're doing. i think we just compliment each other well. but like you say, i can't say for sure how much of this is to do with personality type, or just personality itself.
My partner is an ISFJ, and quite a mature, reasonable one. We benefit from one another in many ways. His social skills are like magic to me, as are my scheduling skills to him. We enjoy many mutual interests, creativity, harmony, as well as alone-time, deep conversations, ... I enjoy his skill of creating a cozy environment, and he appreciates my "precision" as he calls it. As for the INTP's flame thrower and unfilteredness, he likes the honesty and he's more than earned my respect for being fireproof and seeing through bullshit quite well himself.
The urge to correct the people i care about is strong indeed, but it can be conquered. The longer the lesson, the less likely it is to be absorbed. Sometimes it's best to figure out what's the first step and then show it, instead of saying it. Take the other person on the path where they learn it themselves, instead of having me explain it. Unless they are an INTJ, in which case i just explain it. INTJ-s are the easiest to get along with, but the most interesting people to me are usually the INF types. More challenging, more rewarding.
Glad I'm not the only about ISTP 😂 ISTPs are the only sensing types I can see to match with me INTP in a relationship (other than a friendship). Most of my friends have always been ISTPs: the coldness this type gives off attracts me and we share the same dark humor!
@@mariram7593 I've never experienced a cold ISTP. The one I was closest too was the warmest person I had ever met. It was refreshing how warm they were. But I might percieve Ti as warm for some reason. I tend to percieve all Ti Dom's as warm, ISTP is warmer and extra present, with that tertiary Se. I might be weird.
@@Gio-sx7kt of course you're weird, you're an INTP (I guess?)! Kidding I find ISTPs cold at first, but they can actually reveal themselves as very caring people when you get close to them (basically when they choose you don't suck like other humans lol). I have this ISTP friend who isn't good with words at expressing her feelings, but she rememers or do things for me showing she cares with actions. I still wouldn't call an ISTP warm though as I'd do with a feeling type. But I don't want to generalise MBTI since, for instance, some ISTPs could be more in touch with their feelings than others.
@@mariram7593 I'm actually INFJ, I dated an ISTP at one point in time and they were particularly warm, and charismatic, which I attributed to their Se. I did have another friend that I think was an ISTP female that matches your description of your friend. She was very shy and to herself mostly, but liked to surf and had a unique talent for throwing large ceramic vases, which I think was a product of her TiSe. But to me she was warm, at least because I was a bit closer to her, but yeah a bit similar. I don't know if it's just that I look past the exterior in determining warmth, or maybe because I use Ti and just experience it as a well intentioned function, but yeah I'm also weird. 🤷
The INTP&ISFJ marriage I have followed very closely for twenty years and it seems quite painful for the ISFJ. Societal conformity and manners being very high on her list and the other almost at ENTP level of breaking them is constant battle. And of course Fe needs actual attention. But dinner is on the table.
I'm an ENFP female who's been in a relationship with an INTP male for 28 years. Sometimes I feel like speaking in generalities and he hates that. The thing I've tried to work with him on is to not insult me or others when he wants to make a correction. He really pisses me off when he starts our the correction with an outraged "God! That's so stupid!" It's taught me to try to have my backup ready when I do want to say something that contradicts what he thinks. And he loves my happy, go-with-the-flow nature. It's a pairing that works best when both partners behave in a mature (about their own shit) manner.
I would like to know more that how ENFP thinks about INTP as a complement As I'm mature and experienced now- I know now that what is imp and not imp in life for me. As a INTP - (N+P) intuitions and perceiving are imp for me. And I think my partner should honor the same . Perceiving - to be open minded for new possibilities And as an INTP to complement my weakness to strength of (E+F) - I am open to learn and grow my (E+F) aspects.
Some facebook friends even feel pissed off when I note that there is an error or misunderstanding in their data. Then they assume that I doubt their whole intention or issue they posted about. Strange.
As an INTP with ISFJ mother, I have my doubts on that being a good match. ISFJs will take care of things which INTPs appreciate. Neither type know what they really want on the Ni level. ISFJs with undeveloped Ne inferior really don't want to discuss the things that INTPs are usually into. There needs to be some Te or Ni to actually get somewhere with life.
My mom scored ISFJ on her 16personalities test and yeah. Growing up, we did get into long arguments over minute details, but the inferior Ne's lack of imagination and Si dom's rigid adherence to personal experience and rules, etc, was very painful to deal with. :)
Completely agree, there's nothing to talk about with her. She's not even excepting my interests not like being a participant but simply being ignorant.
INTP female with ISFJ mother too. First of all, I have not met ISFJ male. And let’s say if there were such males, I suspect they would be too grounded, boring and over emotional for INTPs🙀
INTP... rationale has lead me to believe in God and this has lead to a pretty close relationship. It sounds irrational to the more atheistic view, but I've found that His understanding and patience has helped with many of my shortcomings. You don't have to believe me, but its as real as any other relationships with more ups than downs.
@@bez1196 I agree with you fellow INTP. I don't find the atheistic arguments very convincing. On the other hand I'm also very reluctant in buying into stupid religious dogma, as my conception of god is based on my own philosophical reasoning. I just don't like to adopt a fixed belief system which is completely illogical.
True enough, as ever but... sometimes the logician just wants to do the most irrational things (whether prompted by others or not) and to be hurt and damaged by doing them, only makes them more bitter and fearful of such emotionally charged realms. Sometimes, an INTP cares enough to want to 'correct' people yes, but if they care even more that, they want to be themselves corrected. Logicians want to learn too not merely teach, and to be protected by another persons wisdom (probably emotional) instead of always relying on their own hard-won knowledge. Its bad enough living in an irrational world, but when one is alone with logic and sustains oneself with it, it leads to a kind of emotional under-nourishment. We are a social species, after all. But being so built as to be so often alone and worse, lonely, its very hard indeed. And you can't reason yourself out of lonliness. Crying doesn't solve anything which is of course logically true, but often, its all an INTP wants to do. I suppose it would take some even rarer type or a saint, to be bold enough to hold the INTP, while reason takes a little vacation. I have yet to find such a person. And that hurts more than the usual sting of people being generally illogical. Sometimes, I would rather be less logical perhaps more stupid and simple, if it meant, well... if it meant I could be more easily loved. I'm an INTP apparently, as y'all might have guessed by now, but frankly, I'd rather be something - anything - else, so that I wouldn't be so alone. I'm logical yes, but as Hume remarks, we are at the end of the day, creatures of and slaves to, our passions. And I so passionatly feel my own lonliness and alienation, that I can barely subsist on the consolations of logic and philosophy anymore. It sucks.
Somewhat agree and somewhat don't 🤔 I mean, yes, we are social beings and yes, it can be quite difficult to get along with an INTP and yes, I too sometimes thought that being a "less complex being" must be a bliss, but after thinking about it, I'd never want to exchange my clear vision for simple bliss. I like to rely on myself, even though I dislike when everyone relies on me all the time (it's just too much). Feeling lonely usually has to do with "feeling misunderstood" and that's something we all as human beings, be it reluctant or not, will have to fight all our lives. Sometimes it'll be worse (especially when close people misunderstand) and sometimes it'll be absolutely fine and we can even laugh about it. Don't give up, move on and let every encounter or mishap in your life be a worthwhile lesson to you 😊
I get along well with my ISFJ mother for the most part (really adore her), but sometimes... there are some very crazy thoughts in her head 🙄 The people I find most interesting and get along with exceptionally well: ENTJs 😂
regarding cognitives functions ENTJs and INTPs are highly compatible. I can tell since I’m an ENTJ and my brother is an INTP and we get along quite well (most of the times). Although, I do think that I enjoy his company more than the way around lmao
@@sophiezhang7258 Hehehe I know what you mean, one of my best friends is ENTJ, we get along super well, for most of the time as well, but sometimes, she stops me from talking, because I get immersed too much in topics I like and that feels a bit bad at times, but it's never even near a critical point 😂 Leading a team with her was the best experience ever, those teams were always successful too 😁
I am an ENFP and in by far the most satisfying, deep and adventurous relationship of my life with an INTP. The issues we had to work through were more surface level - just understanding differences in communication style. I love that you say INTPs point out contradictions. Once he was pointing out my contradictions and I was like, “oh yeah, I totally contradict myself, it’s so human. I don’t judge myself or anyone for that”. And he was so psyched to know it didn’t hurt me and said it was freeing to know he could have his own contradictions! He’s had to learn to trust that I express emotions just to express them, that they are not a tool to manipulate nor have agenda. I have had to learn to trust and respect his pace which has taught me more patience and humility. But fundamentally we are both independent and value the other’s individuality, freedom and space. We share the values of curiosity, questioning, and never-ending learning and growing. And yeah, no food in the fridge, bills aren’t paid on time. But neither of us cares and seeing how bad the other one is at Si, we certainly aren’t trying to get the other to take care of that part of life for us!
As the ENFP in the relationship, yes, how did you get him to be okay with it? My INTP's rule about "no crying while talking because that's not fair" and his resentment of me bringing up issues from the past are feeling very unfair to me. I'm not supposed to talk when I'm upset, but once I've managed to get over it and am calm enough to discuss without tears, it's too late and I'm "dredging up the past"
@Rose Dreamsinger it’s interesting to hear another INTP feel wary about emotions being manipulative. Well, first off, I may be older than many who watch these videos (I’m in my 40’s) so I can express difficult emotions without being in a temper tantrum state, so that probably helped. I think it helped that I let go of the need to “convince” him my feelings were valid, weren’t a ploy, etc. I had good boundaries and wouldn’t participate in arguments that were circular or going nowhere. I would honor my own feelings and tell him he was of course free to think about it anyway he chose, as I don’t seek control. Over time, he came to his own conclusion: his Ti figured out that based on a lot of logical evidence, it didn’t make sense that I was trying to “trick” him with my feelings. We have come to see that both of us used to feel like the disadvantaged one who could be “tricked” by the other. I thought there were no ways to “prove” my feelings rationally, so therefore they wouldn’t be respected and I’d get walked all over, manipulated, etc. I’m glad we are through that phase and have built trust.
@@er6730 That all sounds really difficult and I can think of similar dynamics I used to have with my INTP. First of all, I personally would not participate in a relationship “rule”. Rules in relationships aren’t healthy, but boundaries are. If he is unable to handle crying, then he can make a personal boundary for himself and leave the room. As an ENFP, use your Fi to get in touch with your own personal values and boundaries. Are you willing and able to not cry when sad or hurt? If not, say so. It’s only from authentically expressing what we can and can’t do that we can work towards compromise. Without compromise, the relationship operates from a “sacrifice” mentality- one person sacrificing too much for the other. All we get from that is resentment and exhaustion. I would also ask a rational question: “If we can’t look at/talk about the past, how can learn from it? If we can’t figure out what didn’t work well, how can we learn to do better?”
ISFP here dating an INTP. He values how empathetic, intelligent (mbti has nothing to do with intelligence - be careful with that one), kind and creative I am. I value his intellectualism, loyalty, conversational abilities and willingness to try to understand others. We’re both mature, have stable careers (I’m a nurse and he is an engineer), have the same values, have similar goals, and value alone time. He’s also quite a sweet guy despite his logical tendencies (yes, it’s possible to be both...). Don’t let mbti I hold you back from forming a relationship with whomever you please. It is a lens through which people interpret the world in general, but it is not indicative of exact personality. Every person is unique within each category and capable of change &/or working on their weaknesses and faults. Edit: Something I find extremely endearing about INTPs is their affinity to elaborate on thoughts, ideas, opinions, observances, etc. It makes for wonderful conversation and I’m not sure if this is something all, or even most, INTPs do, but the guy I’m dating certainly possesses this trait.
The affinity to elaborate is an INTP trait. We only do it when we feel there is value in doing so. Since your BF does this with you, it is a sign he likes, trusts, and respects you. The elaboration is sharing our thoughts, ideas, opinions, and observations and is one of those personal inner things we guard and filter from the outside world. Only select people get to see that side of an INTP. To an INTP, it is an intimate part of themselves they are sharing which shows their willingness to be vulnerable with you.
I'm not an INTP (INTJ here and our cognitive functions are so different) but I do relate with a lot of these statements! I repress emotions because I'm aware of how intense they can be and I'm afraid of them overflowing (proven to be true though...), I invest a lot of energy and time trying to give concrete solutions for people I care about, and, although not necessarily in a romantic sense, the one person I have secured the strongest relationship with so far is actually an ISFJ. As always, loving your videos!
Indeed, my sister is an INTJ as well and she's exactly like that, we share a lot of common traits, just that she's a lot more goal oriented and (luckily) gives me advice on how to reach my own goals that sometimes end up in a pile of research on "anything that caught my attention and interest" 😂 INTJs are ❤️
I notice that the emotions my INTJ significant other and I repress are very different. She's actually super shy and quite timid, even fearful, and hyper-feminine...on the inside...but behaviorally she's the opposite on the outside. She only lets out what's underneath with people she's genuinely close to. For me the instincts being repressed are more like unadulterated rage and insane first impulse to charge in where angels fear to tread...on the inside...but behaviorally I'm the exact opposite on the outside (the mild mannered cautious Bruce Banner meme is real). INTx emotions tend to be high-intensity instinct-level emotions, not nuanced like INFx's. The higher order mammalian emotional subtlety is almost missing in its entirety. =S I think both INTx types (over)compensate behaviorally by means of their rational filters, but one for overactive "don't" instincts and the other for overactive "do" instincts.
Yeah your mother and idk 15% of the population?? Don't clump all ISFJs into your mother's behaviour. Also an ISFJ is good for you, not that you'll like it 24/7. Thirdly if you correct their thinking for about 3 years straight maybe you'll end up perfect.
@@arianam9977 I see Te domimants as the plague for a Ti dom. When it comes to your Ti they treat it impersonaly and their arguments are swallow at best. I mean you've been thinking a thing for a year and they say something like: oh yeah it's obvious, next subject. Of course the exact same thing happens backwards for emotional subjects. We're the shallow ones, they just like things more, deeper.
@@drosos_strength_coaching Are you talking about ENTJs? To be honest I haven't really talked that much with any ENTJ, so I can't give an opinion. But I'm talking with an INTJ and I like how he is so far. He's intelligent (though I'm more xd) and he has more (important) knowledge than me (which is cool). Plus he seems like a mature INTJ, as he told me he likes me and he's not as cold as INTJs are said to be.
Im an INTP and my mom is an ISFJ. We had the roughest time and my childhood wasn't too pretty. We literally spent years with a wall against each other (mostly my part) but now we were able to resolve our differences. Despite that, I can still find difficulty in communicating, it's like we speak different languages whenever we talk and when there is an issue it's kinda frustrating (since I focus on trying to find a solution whilst gathering important details and she tends to be emotional and redundant) but since I understand our differences (learning cognitive functions definitely helped), I try to be patient and steer the conversation to a more reasonable one (but obviously prolonged because she will throw irrelevant infos all the time) Despite that, ISFJ being mostly caring and great with real-world mundane tasks really helps a lot, unfortunately, me and probably some other intps would fail to appreciate their efforts as they usually put efforts into things intps don't care about (social expectations, routines etc) but are still important to actually consider.
@@nyxcheshire4247 Thank you for sharing. I'm an INFJ with ISTJ parent and the difference between communication styles can really show sometimes. That's why I don't think IN types are really suited to IS-J types.
Blah Smith, father of my children is ISFJ, and he is the best match despite all his imperfections which make me crazy. He is my guide and he is also my caring nanny - and that is soooo nice. And, which is very interesting and I still can't solve how he does it - he easily handles me.
@@nyxcheshire4247 different languages is extremely correct. It's like when I say left, she hears wright and I'm like "wtf?" I appreciate what she's doing but she's doing the "wrong" thing.
And here i am, an INTP (self typed) who typed his girlfriend as ISTP. From my experience: perfect match, although i find it slightly upsetting, that for her the is a 'perfect time' for everything and not a 'perfect circumstance' like for me. I am sure she doesn't find certain traits of me charming, but if i were to list all of them that i suspect i would be sitting here a long time
Yeah, I would tend to agree. I'm an INTP and my sister is one of the few ISTPs I know. We get along pretty well, usually and she kinda keeps me sane and connected to the world. I think a mature ISTP is a pretty good fit for a relationship, at least for some INTPs.
@@thecoleopterist My old boss was an ISTP and we got a long super well. I think ISTP is the type that's the most NT without actually being NT. They don't use their imagination as often as we do, but they're nonetheless intelligent, quick, adaptable, and can often roll with the punches of an INTP.
INTP’s emotion needs to be looked after as well as their every life. When an thinking and logical INTP can develop a mature emotion system, it’s beautiful.
So good to hear your caution about using MBTI to determine relationships! I always cringe when I hear people use personality type as some kind of relationship bible. It's terrible advice. Case in point: almost every site that gives relationship guidance based on MBTI says that INTP and ISFJ are mortal enemies. I'm an INTP, married to an ISFJ for 19 years. Challenges? Sure. But it would be that way no matter which types we are.
@@FrankDAgostino77 I've never had intp result until I figured out what this test wants from me to say. It defined me as ixxj because ti is actually a judging function as well as fi so it has seen me as a judger but before I typed myself upside down so check out maybe there's something wrong because it kept saying I'm intj until I started to put neutral answers to the questions my Ti considered unclear. But if she's stuck on control then she's clearly ixxj to check this out bring a dog and watch if she treats a dog as a "dog" she's ixxj, as a human - she's not. (When I was about 10, we had a puppy and it was on the chain and he was blocking my way and badly scratching me but I couldn't help it and my isfj mother kicked his ass with her saviour control, I am able to control the dog as a jumper but she does it in autopilot, to be clear she doesn't have to actually hit the dog just show power and control). But I don't know how on 19 years you would not be able to figure out is she controling especially as an intp. But I also don't understand how you survive with that because when I hear isfj telling me what to do I'm not doing it as a result we fight. It's a constant beef. She's probably an amazing cook.
@@arfajmind2984 is a matter of the environment one grew up in to believe.. i sometimes give this example that where there's light there's darkness and where there's darkness somewhere some how light is present because those two things need each other to exist
For me, investing any amount of time in another person is an indication of care. I am notorious for icing people out unless they are in some way important to me. A sister of mine is physically unhealthy-- has been for decades-- and despite trying to assist her by talking to her about healthier habits, my extreme love for her eventually pushed me to intervene by having her live with me for 3 and a half weeks. After researching her ailments and natural ways we could counter/address them, I regimented her diet, her exercise, her stress management, and even her sleep. At the end of her time with me, she'd lost 27 pounds, reversed out of prediabetes, brought her blood pressure down to the point where her doctor was considering weaning her off blood pressure meds, she was sleeping better, had less severe bouts of emotional turbulence and was overall a more positive and playful person. I loved, loved, LOVED being able to assist her in this way, but eventually I needed my apartment back. I craved getting back to my own individualized mental, physical and emotional rhythms, even if to others they could be perceived as haphazard.
@@exnihilonihilfit6316 - - That's a rather problematic statement. More nuance is required. Occasionally, prioritizing the needs of others over one's own needs, especially if meeting the needs of others do not lead to self-neglect and/or self-abuse, is healthy in an interpersonal regard. Those who are unwilling or incapable of consideration of the needs of others are usually egotists to the point where they are detrimental to themselves and others.
me an INTP married to an ESFJ. haha the best we have the same functions but in reverse. I learn a lot about Fe and he learns some Ti attributions like problem-solving. Also, he tolerates my Ne and gets used to my craziest ideas I have at 1am but as he sometimes can't leave me alone... he deserves to hear those ideas XD
It always fascinates me how spot-on the vids are and how understood I feel. Like, I just wanna send them to my friends every time they don't get my behavior, lol
I have read a lot of comments on the pairing between INTP and INFJ and the attitude they have shown. So, because people actually take it as a given that a person is what they say they are, they rarely check the veracity of it. And this is not only to be applied on certain types, but rather all. Trust only the knowledge of the functions and how they work, not what other people say. They might be confused about the functions they are using. A bit of skepticism goes a long way. And if you can’t really understand a certain type, try observing the sort of reasoning they have as a fictional character in a book, movie, … Either way, having a brother who is an INTP and me being an INFJ, I know that the reason we both can function well together is due to our shared judging functions, yet balance our approach due to having different perceiving functions. While my brother has a chill attitude overall, mine is more motivating and driven. People stating an article they have read on those types being referred to as Golden because of the mutual admiration towards higher use of either Ti, or Fe, perhaps should try to switch perspective: our cognitive functions don’t work one at a time. There is no play button, or pause one we get to press at will. Functions exist and interact mutually. The difference is ultimately in the way those function can manifest themselves, not how much, or little we use them. It is how we use them that matters. Even though there is a system most people use and rely on to make sense of the functions, in order to truly get to the bottom of things, try deconstructing it all, and then put it back together making sure that you have reached an understanding of the structure. And finally, I will share a personal opinion on INTPs. They can be quite easygoing, adaptable, kind, caring. So, I do believe that they can get along well with people who have different personality types in any kind of relationship - be it family, romantic one, friendship,… Nothing can ever stop them.
I’m INTP, and my soulmate is also INTP. We started from normal friendship, and gradually went deeper. It took us very long time to realize that we actually love each other.
INTP with ISTP partner ... we don’t argue often, but when we do, it is epic. My superior verbal jousting skills combined with emotional self-control are deliciously infuriating.
I'm an INTP and my wife is an ISFJ. I think it's a good match but, when I try to explain something to her, I feel she doesn't understand that logic and being right is more important to me than being nice. Sometimes I try to agree with her on something that she is explaining to me, and when I rephrase what she said with my own words, to see if I'm understanding correctly but trying to apply logic to it, she thinks I'm trying to argue against her point. We definitely don't think the same way but we complement each other in lots of ways.
This would explain why I finally met my mate at age 38. Took me a while to find that perfect person for me, but find them I did! Married and extremely happy now.
INTP : for me, by far the biggest challenge in a relationship is that a relationship needs to be taken care of. By going on dates, caring about anniversaires, going to familly diners, being there at all during the day instead of in my head. Yes, the biggest challenge is being there at all. I have had almost no relationships, and friendships that ended because of fights. They ended because i didnt take care of that relationship enough. Friends i didnt contact enough.... Then again i have been described as arrogant and unsensitive several times. The irony is that its just as true as it is wrong.
Here I am, same problem until I reached the 30y old, when huge traumas made me feel much more close to other people and feelings exploded all in once. Now the problem is that the Fi sucks and I sound awkward when trying to understand the others feeling. It's a challenge man. It's like feeling "sadness" in a big pot where everything is mixed together and there's connection between the most ridiculous things. Damn. Hard. It takes a lot of time to be conscious, but each minute spent on understanding human nature is totally worth it.
Istp here , same man , and the worse , I am a girl , for some reason I think people expect girls to be more caring regarding the things you mentioned ,ahh , I don't know
INTP here, a good friend of mine was ISFJ at a time when I didn't have any other friends. They would always remind me of important stuff that I forgot about and they cared about me. Sadly, they went to a different school and we rarely talk now.
INTP with an ISTP woman, long term marriage. Intellectually we have a great time, but being intimate together is impossible and has the been the bane of our existence. Lots of resentment that we never manage to work out, no matter how much we both understand the problems.
Hi there, @@midoriemi3859. I'd say that his best quality, is his ability to solve problems .He doesn't just solve them, he will come up with the most efficient, original, and precise solution for the problem at hand. He will even invent new tools for his solution. I also really appreciate the deep conversations that we have together, he is my best friend. We've been together for 13 years now.
I'm an INTP, and i have a ISFP Friend that Is exactly what i like in a relationship: when we met, she sent me a video and tell her what i think about it, i said that it wasn't my thing and all that stuff, but i was surprised that she didn't felt offended of what i said... I love her so much.
INTP here married to an ESFP. Love the woman. She gives me my freedom and alone time. I still haven't worked her out. Never bored and we can talk things through. Very much like Ying and Yang. We still even flirt a lot. Oh boy does she drive me nuts with how forgetful she is. But that's about it. She can't stand how clumsy and I am. It's something we have learned to live with. The first 2 years were the hardest but now in our 6th year and feel more deeply attached every day
Personally, my mom is an ISFJ (i’m quite sure about this), my brother an INTP and I’m an ENTJ. I find that both my mom and I enjoy my brother’s company a lot, but I don’t really know if he feels the same way. He’s hard to read. But he definitely doesn’t always enjoy my mom’s company since she can be really pushy and impulsive about other people’s matters. I’ll have to disagree about INTPxISFJ
Was married to an ISFJ, It can work, sort of. The biggest thing missing for us is the abstract conversations and spontaneous things. We try to bring that to the table, but with mixed results. ISFJs just end up nagging us over Si things
I'm an INTP-A who has over 90% in Assertiveness and thinking and i believe in God. HOWEVER, I always question stuff and rules in religion. "Why This" "Why That" "What's this's use?" etc..
Same. I’m a Christian INTP, and I’m always questioning things. I could not stop researching until I find a good and reasonable answer to something, whether it be a certain verse in the Bible, or the church. I still hold God close to my heart, because honestly He is the reason why I always thirst for knowledge
I think that inxj are actually more disbelieving at that point. It's easier for them to believe in aliens then to believe in God. I think it's easier to make them believe in anything else...
As a fully non-superstitious INTP I can't imagine being married to someone who believes in any religion, superstition or conspiracy theories. I couldn't fully respect them. They can be irrational sometimes about everything else but I want a fully sane, logical partner in general. Luckily, I somehow mananged to find a single such person on planet Earth and we've been happily married for years. People like this are incredibly rare, unheard of. I couldn't pass such opportunity.
After reading a lot of comments here, maybe some of you should pay a bit more attention not to fall into an "I'm smarter than pretty much everyone" mindset. I wrote it like that instead of the classic "I'm better than everyone" because many people feel kind of both superior and inferior to others; also, many people do realize that there are obviously very smart, or just smarter, people in this world, but at the same time they feel intelectually superior to almost everyone they know that doesn't think like them and can even act like everyone is subpar. Of course this isn't specifically just an INTP thing, nor are all INTPs like this, or fully like this. Of course, I'm not saying you're not smart either, or that you should be with someone you don't even enjoy a conversation with or you're not compatible with. Just remember that your intelligence will naturally show without you constantly putting emphasis on it. Basically what I'm saying is be careful not to become a "r/iamverysmart" kind of person, you don't need it. Also, always remember that you *can* be wrong, about a whole lot of things. I'm sorry if I sounded demeaning or anything like that, it's just that this is something I've also seen irl in people (to an extent in myself too) a whole lot, much worse than here, and it's sad. It's sad that some people feel like they need to be preachy to show they're smart, or that they tie their identity and worth to this label of "intellectually superior". Or for some to think that being an INTP makes them intellectually superior, in the same cliche way as let's say those "not like other girls" type INFPs in some comment sections. There are also so many things one can learn by being around you INTPs. Seeing your passion is motivating. Anyway sorry for writing a whole ass novel lol, and if anyone got here, thank you for reading!
Indeed, the wise know that they know nothing 😁 Even in my field of research I learn something new everyday from various people of various ages and various fields of research. I appreciate their flexible mind, their intelligence and intellect, but I also appreciate street-smart people, as long as people appreciate logic, thinking in general, as long as they are willing to learn and understand, that's intelligence and that should be appreciated.
I agree. It's always extremely important to me to remember that there are many kinds of intelligence and ways to measure it. I love seeing different people's perspectives on things.
I don't see people say it, it might seem like that but how the type that feels like it's not smart enough claim that they are? That's the perception other types have on us but it's clearly false.
My husband is an ENTJ - we have enough interest in common that we can never run out of things to talk about, but can also enjoy comfortable silence. He has his own time consuming interests which leaves me plenty of personal space. We don't exactly share the same values on everything, but we do respect and understand the merits of each-other's opinions. We do take the time to thoroughly discuss and form a compromise when it comes to important things - but mostly we are just happy to let each-other be. He gets me out of the house and makes me interact with people, which I recognize is ultimately a good thing. To be honest, I'm not sure what I have to offer, but at least I can make him laugh.
Interesting about the isfj being a good match...my parents are an intp-isfj pair. They've been married for over 4 decades. Sometimes it's baffling to me how they get along so well, as on the surface they seem to be speaking different languages.
I've only known one ISFJ well and really like her, but I can only see an enormous intellectual mismatch between ISFJ and INTP, on both level of interest and capacity. I'm not sure about this pairing, although I am a big fan of both types that i've known irl. from, intj
I have chosen that a relationship is too draining of my life force; those energies are best to be conserved and invested in me. I have actually evolved out of requiring, desiring, or needing to be in one, and that, actually, suits me just fine. Solitude is Bliss, but not for all.
As someone that went through 18 years of hell with an ISFJ, DON'T DO IT!!!! They need to have things done the right way, which is there way. Si hero can't tolerate INTP quirks. It affects their acceptability in their head. ISFPs are much better. No common traits so your Ne and Ti are a mystery that appeals to their sense of adventure. You also cover each other's blind spots as your parent functions are the other's trickster function. Lots to learn from each other if you aren't afraid to show feelings and they can receive wisdom from your Ti.
So True ! I am in process of divorcing my ISFJ just after 1.5 yrs of marriage. Maybe staying with her for long during corona period escalated the conflicts.
One day my sister litrally cried when I explained her how she was wrong logically(withous considering her feelings). Although she accepted her mistake, my rationality still hurt her. Sometimes we gotta put our rationality aside in relationships. Dont be so harsh on the person for being illogigal. just know that most people cant think logically like you and thats okay.
Mistakes INTPs make in relationships: *Being in them in the first place.* "If they're investing the time to correct you, it's actually a sign that they care" Me: So in other words *"INTPs show that they care by correcting your faulty logic"*
I'm INFP and my INTP new friend of 2 months asked me out for a movie yesterday. He has been calling me every single day and we text and have intresting conversation until midnight every night. Sometimes we have little debates to keep things intresting. I've come to really like him. I really enjoy being with him and we have a lot in common. I'm curious to see how it goes. If anyone has any tips for a very first date (like, very, very first) in general or when it comes to INTPs, I'd be extremely grateful.
1:30 I didn't even know that judging myself for emotions/trying to think my way out of emotions was a common INTP thing.... I'm quite self-aware but even I didn't catch this
What's with all the picking on ISFJs, people? Just because they are different from an INTP? It doesn't give them less worth or value to be the type they are. They are as much needed as any other type out there, stop judging start observing, develop an understanding of others and why they may act the way they do. There's a reason for everything, it's just hidden sometimes. No type is really stupid, they just think differently. What's stupid are those people, and I srsly don't give a damn on their types, that don't think or think they know it all (that can be any type out there). The one thing we should distrust most is ourselves and our judgement. Falsify (yes, as in statistics) whatever you think, it helps.
Someone can throw rocks on me but I think the most stupid type is actually my personal favourite isfp. I love they because they are very different from INTP they are actually the most opposite type I absolutely love them but they are dumb as shit. But it makes them funny as shit.
“INTP’s aren’t robots, they are reluctant humans.” This is so good! I’ve been called a robot so many times in my past relationships. I care I just show it differently.
I'm an INTP that married an ENTJ. 7 years now. I think we INTPs do well with someone high energy and commanding, but not needy. The ENTJ does not need us to be a part of their external life and will just tell us what needs to be done. The ENTJ gets a compliant minion at home that they can occassionally consult. It all works out.
Lol! Yes to this all! Loved this...self-ironically, of course. 😉 Seriously though, as an oddly friendly INTP who *still* experiences those awkward moments when I sense people are thinking that I'm thinking/saying "too much", we should try to remember that everyone has thoughts "that matter", be they logical or illogical (usually the latter and usually repetitively so 🙄). Be generous when/if they might struggle to express these thoughts/feelings that they have. The latter two things aren't separate anyway (no, really, they're not. I swear. 😆). We INTPs need to avoid giving into an easy temptation to "correct" everybody---unless they're in true imminent danger; or only after we've listened very carefully, and have been asked for the assistance of the clearness of our thoughts that we do tend to cultivate; and, above all, we know in our minds-hearts that it's genuinely coming from a place of care. So use language that says that outright. Perhaps, "I truly, really care about you. Tons. So see that buzzsaw you're about to plow into for, like, the 70th billionth time? Please don't do that, as we discussed. Please turn around and go waaaay in the other direction so that you avoid an unnecessary and expensive trip to the ER. I love you. I think." Laugh--a lot! 🤣🤣🤣 Do it in your room by yourself! Seriously---practice laughing! Get in the habit of just laughing like an absolute lunatic for no freaking reason at all. You'll find this person in you who's softer, funnier and much, much sillier than you thought, who takes great joy in a whole bunch of things that have nothing to do with INTPs' favorite "world of ideas". That person will shine through whenever needed. So much irrationality rules the day in nearly aspect of life out there now. Me? I feel so much I've been "box turtling"--a lot. But I've also made an effort to poke my head out of that protective shell--and it's proven to be very rewarding every time. So, relax, go out and "play"! Find "playmates" to join in. They'll come out to play with you, too. Apologies for the length! Much love to all from an INTP who occasionally gets her nose out of her books, sticks her head and legs out her comfy, wee turtle shell, and goes out to play in the sunlight. 🌞
intp tip for dating - put yourself out there and hope someone adopts you.
Same for friendships
@@everytimesadnessere1274 nah, friendships are easier.
true that
😂
Don t worry, I ll adopt Intps and put them to work hahaha
Have an INTP friend, but rather than correcting people, I think her love language is sending memes and research.
We don’t know each other, do we?
It is so true.. I'm glad to have an INTP partners at my workplace and she always be my fkin best friend for ever.. As l am INFJ ,l always do and try to search on every meaning of their memes and love to read their research too..
Holy hell!!! Yesss! Exactly! MBTI community understands me 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺
Omg I love research. I rarely ever so it when I'm talking to people though. I'd rather just ask them. I've had a lot of people tell me they google stuff while we are talking
I’m INTP. I love GIFs LOL. I love a good meme too, though I’m not obsessed with them. I love research!
“if they’re investing the time to correct you, it’s actually a sign that they care”
THIS!! i wish more people understood that lol
Sad that I often have to reserve a plan b in case they misunderstood my intention and think that I'm just lecturing them
Obviously I only criticize things that have potential to change since I don't like doing pointless things.
If only you understood it also bothers people. Dont forget its something you can help dont be insufrable because im "INTP"!!!!
@@N-A762 I hope you understand though that you running around calling people insufferable may be worse to them. No need to be so condescending for no reason when someone is just expressing that they wish to be understood more often.
@@danw91 It doesn't stop at that for most people. We are at a point where everyone wants to take flaws and make it a part of there personality instead of working on themselves. Its not being understood it is being enabled.
"INTPs are not robots. They are... reluctant humans."
Nailed it!
SO RELUCTANT.
Or maybe the most human if you regard logic as being the least animalistic function.
?? I am never reluctant, I am just not interested in things they expect from me, while being very agitated about things I am interested in. Yet this would be true with most P-s.
Lmao, I am intp and Ive never felt so called out by a video. Im an atheist, I kinda hate humanity, emotions, ILLOGIC (cant stand irrationality, if you contradict yourself, like he said in the video, and especially during an argument, I will jump down your throat and not let go). My mother used to call me her little vulcano cause Id keep all my emotions bottled up untill Id explode. And thats only the first minute of the video.
@@savvageorge but aren't humans animals
My best friend is INTP and it's so funny when I tell him I get pizza and he can just stay where he is. His face becomes the happiest in the world, like a little child! "Oh someone cares about me, no need for movement... :) "
YOU'RE A BLESSING. I'm not your best friend but thank you very much lol
Whoaaaa to have such a friend 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺
Da Vinci bless ya!
Edit: if you didn't get it already I am an INTP-
soo what's your type
my intp ass always say this: people that give me food= FRIENDS. my love is cheap. just feed me. i will love you
I think the love language for INTP is an act of serving.. LOL
INTP and dating? I thought it was a myth
We don't date, we get adopted
@@chrisb9143 yes
I don't date. I just choose people for sex and choose people for a partnership. That simple it is.
All the men in my immediate family are INTPs. Obviously, my father is dating (and I have no idea how his girlfriend puts up with him) but my little brother and I are lost causes.
I was content with being alone for the rest of my life but then I got adopted by a very sweet girl who somehow puts up with my bs
You don't find a relationship, you find a romantic interest, a relationship is something that you build.
Nicely said
Preferably from friendship
While I get what you are going for, I must slightly disagree. When I meet someone that I find physically attractive, I immediately start observing and analyzing their thoughts/words and behaviors for compatibility. This is a cognitive behavior, not an emotional one. There is an immediate and ongoing assessment for the potential for a relationship. While that is, to your point, not a relationship itself, the relationship that might come out of it is not based on a “romantic interest”. It is based on meeting relationship criteria. So you are, in fact, looking for and hopefully ‘finding’ a relationship.
Preach ExTJ
@@zacg7 Analysing them doesn't mean you have a relationship, my point stands
'Not a robot, just a reluctant human' is the best, most concise description of me I've ever heard, for so many reasons. Thank you for this! Also, I've very happy alone, but still clicked here immediately lol
"You need a tolerance for irrationally"
I refuse 😭
It’s definitely really fucking hard 🤣
That's weird. You have just been explained the logic behind accepting the tolerance. To not accept it would be illogical. (Fzzt!)
@@fleetingfootnotes9133 I know and I hate it.
That's irrational
@@Pietrosavr tell me about it
I am an INTP in relationship with an ISTJ. He thinks he is very logical but oh boy... he does not see the 6000+ other aspects and dimensions of logic and I just can not explain it to him. But he looks after me which is really nice and honestly I really need it. The weird thing is that everibody say that INTPs are the robots but I actually think that my ISTJ is waaay more robotic than me. Sometimes I feel I am hippie compare to him.
I dated an ISTJ once, and I can relate to this. He definitely cared a lot about me and didn't like to see how much of a mess I was. We were both extremely logical, but he wasn't a rule-breaker in any way and that often bothered me. Not to mention how he got better grades than me while I thought I was smarter, leading to my resentment. I'm glad I've matured since then; I don't think INTPs and ISTJs are incompatible but their immature versions will have difficulties.
No no, you're right. INTP's aren’t the most robotic type. I’m definitely an XNTP and I cry a lot and write a lot of songs about my feelings. I'm not an INFP, but saying INTP's are robotic is a stereotype. I think that ESTP's are pretty robotic sometimes
For me ESTP often pretend to be emotional while actually not caring which I can in a sense see as robotic, and they see every mistake instantly like scanning machine it's scary. But boy, they are Illogical, their lack of (real) common sense infuriates me
@@rickrivers2021 The comment above explained it well!
I believe it. I used to have an ISTJ coworker who acted like a robot. Ate lunch with a stop watch for 30 minutes to the second! She would only speak to coworkers if she was on the clock. So if work started at 9am she would not speak to you at 8:57am. Very rude in my opinion. We'd call her Robotron behind her back 😆
(INTP)
when i try to explain to my friends that "the most sexy thing about a woman" is if that hypothetical woman finds a logical mistake or fallacy in my argument/statement and corrects me on it they just have this "?_?" look on their face.
in an ideal scenario she is an expert in a certain field and can nerd out about it for hours. there is nothing more vitalizing than learning new stuff and meet smart(er) persons.
i find it to be extremly weird that many people dont call you out because of some arbitrary politeness reason....
Yessss!! If I state a random fact about something obscure we’re discussing and she corrects or adds onto it, my heart is on cloud 9 🤣
INTJ here - my partner is an INTP and once he said that statement, I knew we get each other.
wait a min... you have friends ? daaaaaaaaaaaaaaamn
@@mr.raider744 i have extroverts that kinda adopted me....XD
@@Nuggetmonk 😶
I'm an INTP dating an INFJ. Well she take care of me, She make me feel special, She hear me out and understand things from perspective whenever I throw random logical theories towards her and better she contradict my theory and boom we're in a logical debate and we both love that shit. Sometimes she gets mad so I understand the situation and hear her out, And sometimes when I feel overwhelmed and start speaking shit out ( Emotional response to be precise ) she hears me out and empathize with me, I mostly be aware about that I'm acting emotionally and get the hang of situation as fast I could... But she understands just everything and never blames things on me, She always loves me the same knowing the things I mostly talk are shit, She never calls me weird, She understand me better than anyone ever did... She's surely a blessing for me!
Yes, I found INFJs to be a good match due to their nearly supernatural ability to read people, understand their feelings more than these people often can themselves. I really appreciate how I don't even have to say much and they "get it" and help me sort out this mess. Something I think an INTP can offer in return, that I do, is opening up them to different perspectives, point of views. I have noticed they can get locked into some narrow ones, and ruminate endlessly about something and get very pessimistic, especially when it comes to conflicts with people, their self worth etc. and be p much the least judgemental out of all types. They know I won't lie and keep a database of what they do, I mull over situations that distress them calmly and basically untie that knot, because that's what INTPs are best at. Multiple solutions and not insisting they do X, this is their choice but I am showing them exits from that maze and a wider world beyond, while they help me navigate my own internal world and how to deal with people's emotions. Plus I think they so appreciate this adventurous side to INTPs, we don't do that this often but I can find myself sometimes doing random fun thing spontaneously and I always saw them have fun when taken along on the ride, just a bit out of their comfort zone, a moment to feel careless. That that is more for friends and family. When it comes to a relationship, strong F types make me feel like I'm walking on eggshells at some point and that's too exhausting. But I'd met someone lately that is just slightly on the F side and I must say this is a really healthy relationship, although maybe because its nature is "more than friends" but not actually dating. Maybe that takes the pressure off? Idk it is comfortable and whatever it is and becomes, I really wish for it to last.
Retest with a group of friends and reclass.
ISFP Male
What'd you mean sir? Didn't get the actual context?
congratulations dude!
This is exactly what I had with my bff . Wish she was a man, so I could date her😂
It isn't logically sound to knowingly enter into a relationship with one of us INTP, so from the very beginning, we are already disappointed in our partner's decision making skills.
Oof
God this is so me, I'm so dissapointed with how actually could my friend (who has repeatedly said he loves me) even likes me, I'm like seriously u like me even though i have shown you my true face, even though i have repeatedly told you not to like you still like me. (to be honest it was quite flattering in the intial years, but after that he is just some one who cares about me but also super annoying.
Honestly i have just become so dependent on him that now i don't evzn function properly without him, and i still don't like him ughhh. I always feel terrible that he is stuck with me :( .this is just so terrible and this eats me away all the time.
Thanks for reading this, i know I'm a terrible person.
@@thesilentvoice3397 Do you find his kindness to you annoying because he has an agenda of making you fall in love with him? He has openly declared his intentions which is quite noble, so not a guy who is exploiting the friend zone. He always wanted you to be his lover. Maybe you should just try doing some kind things for him as an attempt to try and restore the balance, maybe bake some cookies? A side effect of doing so might make you fall in love with him. Alternatively, maybe just give the guy some wild sex and see how that changes things? Afterwards, you can always say "yeah… nah, doesn't work for me, but I tried". Just make sure it's wild with him in a dominant role, that's really important. Sounds like he has put in the effort and is probably a genuinely nice guy, and it's not prostituting yourself, because it's an experiment. It only needs to be done one time, then you won't ever need to feel guilty. I was joking at first, but I convinced myself that this is probably the best course of action, and now I actually think you should give it a go. Just fully submit yourself and see how much of a nice guy he truly is? What do you think?
@@wormalism yeah he is a nice guy that i can surely say after observing him. And i have tried both trying to fall for him or just making him disgusted with me so that he will lose interest in me both didn't work, i didn't fall for him and he wasn't disgusted with me.
At this point we actually live in hostels ,he is a physics major and I'm maths so we can't spend much time together but I'm heavily dependend on him, like he will call me so we go to canteen together to eat if he doesn't call i just forget about food, he reminds me of assignments and tests and also that my grades are really bad this i need to study more stuff like that.
So yeah he isn't someone i deserve but i just can't push him away cause as u can see he is very much needed for me function.
But i don't love him at all, i have no interest in what he is doing, he doesn't stimulate me intellectually at all infact when we r together he just tries to cuddle with me (sometimes this is fine but i hate wasting time like this) like our time together is so bland that i don't evzn have any impression of it.
Also about the sex part i don't really care about sex ,but i also don't wanna get in trouble (i belong to a strictly religious family so i can't really do away with my virginity ya know). I mean I'm just scared if someday this would create a mess, thats why i don't wanna do it.
Maybe it's cause I'm probably asexual ,i don't really think about sex and on side note it disgusts me (I'm slightly mysophobic).
I'm just so done with relationships, I'm probably gonna stay single my whole life when This one ends.
@@thesilentvoice3397 I would like to talk to you on a private channel. I am quite concerned about you. You sound like you are in despair. This sounds like you are in a really bad situation.
I don't know why, but as a female INTP, I usually find myself being attracted to INFP and ENTP men. The idealism and cuteness of INFPs just fascinate me, and I really like the ENTP's way of thinking and sarcasm.
INFPS are adorable and sweet as heck while ENTPs are hot and hilarious
As an intp male, I agree with this. I’m currently attracted to an Infp and an entp female.
Oh yes! ENTPs are very fun to have discussions with!! The only ones that are not afraid to discuss any topic, no matter how "feelsy" other ppl feel about it, how controversial, and it's a very fun game to just dig insanely deep into everything, mutually correcting each other's logical inconsistencies and knowing we are fine with it. It's very intellectually fulfilling and I appreciate the push they give to be a bit more social and confident! INFPs are hit and miss for me, they are comfy to be around with but I eventually feel a bit too clumsy with their feelings and like I might be hurting them no matter how hard I try to be careful.
I second this statement.
Though ISFP might seem out of reach, circumstances throw in that scenario.
Depicted in,
What Women Want/ 27 dresses/ Ugly Truth/ Jane Eyre to name a few..
INFJ married to an INTP...and feeling very validated and not totally alone right now!
INTP married to an ISFJ. He really hit the nail on the head.
INTP + INFJ is a great match IMO. Personally, I seem to get along best with INFJs, but if Socionics has any credence, perhaps the feeling is not always mutual lol. INTPs are more the beneficiaries. I've never heard many complaints from INFJs, but maybe they are just being polite and biting their tongue.
@@heatherbryant4197 I will take note of that🤔 I like intp , but I feel tired thinking that I might have to become the mom “ setting orders” which I don’t want to be. I hate making myself Bossy. And I already don’t like doing chores but then I have to push another person to share it😅 like having another son.
INTP in a relationship with an INFJ 🥰
INFJ married to ISFJ. I have to mother my ISFJ too. I don't think type matters as much as upbringing when it comes to that issue, ime.
ENTJ dating an INTP. We’re both mature, healthy versions of our types. That definitely helps. If we had more of the stereotypes then it’d be much more difficult.
Wow. Good luck with that.
My dad is an ENTJ. I just really don’t know if I could handle that level of extroversion in my spouse.
Married an ENTJ! Really has been the best 8 years ever. They help with the whole execution thing… 😊
INTP here currently dating an ENFP. She's been pretty patient with me, but I am just so terribly awkward. I feel like a robot constantly short circuiting around her. She's much more touchy and flirty which makes me feel even more awkward, and she can talk endlessly about actresses and musicals I know nothing about. This is perfectly fine with me though because she doesn't really expect me to contribute to that conversation much. I listen, but I can usually expend most of my mental energy on something more interesting to me (like video games) while she rants. We play Stardew Valley together.
Update: We broke up. She was too clingy for me.
Also an INTP dating an ENFP. I find that the one thing that makes this kind of pairing work really is patience.
Oftentimes when my SO gets overwhelmed with her work, logic-ing her problems isn’t always the best approach and just letting her rant and just being there to listen and affirm that she’s doing a good job is the best way to go about it. Then dropping the logical approach to handling it once she’s calmed down.
Similarly when I’m stressed out she’s there to standby and be patient with me letting me just extrapolate things to their logical extremes then she comes in and gives me a hug after it to cap off the stress release.
On the flip side what keeps things interesting is the creativity. ENFP’s are really creative especially with all their ideas which really tickles my Si. And when I go and talk to her about some abstract but logical topics she’s really intrigued and more often than not I’ve heard her saying: “I love it when you talk smart”.
i play my country's national anthem in my head whenever she talks about celebrities and all those nonsense topics
I would like to know more that how ENFP thinks about INTP as a complement
@@MadHattedLion I would like to know more that how ENFP thinks about INTP as an complement
I'm an INFP flirting with an INTP and I relate to this entire comment, mainly the musicals conversations xD thankfully my I is close to an E
"A relationship is essentially two people who mutually agreed to put up with each other's bulls it."
One of the best definitions for a relationship I've encountered in a while.
I think one of the main characteristics of an INTP in a relationship is that we can be extremely understanding. Even if the other person wronged me or made a mistake, I can almost always understand why, or at least I know that there are many possible reasons why this could have happened, and it doesn't necessarily mean that the other person doesn't care. The problem is, that many people abuse this. Maybe not even intentionally, but they can get too comfortable relying on the INTP's being understanding. Maybe it is the combination of seeing all the possibilities and suppressing our own emotions. If you don't take your emotions into account when making a decision, why would other people do it?
There are wolves that target INTPs to control, "the goose that layer the golden egg". If they can't control you, they must "break you".
Research ISFs. They start out as loyal friends then relationship can grow or stay friends for life.
so very very true.
95% relate.
I’m an INTP, very happily married to an INTJ for the last 7 years. I think having someone with the same passion for abstract thinking, but also thinks in a different way, is a huge advantage. We can challenge each other without anyone getting too hung up on offending/being offended. I also think it helps to have someone who is a “J” ... decisions need to be made, and I’d rather by the advisor than the decider.
Where do I find an INTP woman ?
Also, it's not exactly the "J" letter in the INTJ that's doing the magic. Watch this: th-cam.com/video/0rhxGnzE5Ng/w-d-xo.html
It doesn't help that the INTJ's and ENTJ's as the most compatible with INTP are the 2nd and 3rd most rare personality types. Just under 4% of people in the population combined.
Why be offended at all?
If you get offended you might be a young INTJ or you're miss categorize, best way to take any test is in a group..
ISFP
I think INTJs & INTPs are the most compatible romantically.
I'm an INTJ witn an INTP husband and its been wonderful. We've known each other for 13 years but have been together for almost 4. I would also have to agree that we have similar dynamics to yours and hands down, we are happily stuck with each other for life and the great beyond😂
Honestly being an INTP in regards to relationship is craving a deep intellectual connection but getting bored of a person once you figure them out.
Edit: I appreciate all of you guys, really, but I wasn't complaining and certainly not asking for dating advice XD
It is like you pulled the words out of my mouth. This 100% ^^
Sound like a bunch of douches tbh
@@conallomahoney9311 That's a very fair point - it's not the best, but I would rather face that I think this way than dodge it. It's now a negative perspective I can shift.
@Celty Sturluson Yeh it almost always is temporary. I think it's the equivalent of the waning honeymoon period. With the right attitude, it's not a bad thing, and it just evolves into something else.
@@lulukrassova2196 cant ask anymore of someone if they are trying to improve themselves. Was a joke anyways
I'm an INTP and your point about grocery shopping is interesting; until I had kids, primarily when I was single, the only way I could keep food stocked was if I just bought a bunch of crap and threw it in the fridge. I would just go to the grocery store and bought whatever was on my mind and if I ran out, I was sort of stuck, it would take everything to get me to go back to buy more food. I'd rather go get take out. When I had kids, that all changed -- now I'm compulsively set to having a set menu and list to buy -- I hate being responsible for it, but I insist on it. On those occasions when I'm alone again though, I go back to my natural tendencies. I think, at least for myself, a relatively self-aware mature INTP and cognizant of weaknesses, I do my best to stick to my commitments and responsibilties, and I find the logical approach is that of a list and a routine, sometimes, even if it's not the most comfortable thing for me to do.
That said, I think calling INTPs comforts in a "routine" is a little...too precise. At least in my case, it's not so much a routine as much as a "mode". . It's more like -- having a set time of "energy and motivation" to do "things", rather than a committed time to do a specific task. I actually have trouble sticking to a routine, and as soon as I'm in one, if I break it, it's hard for me to go back. An example of this is exercise. For my job (and overall health), I have to keep fit, so I try to exercise every day with a set "routine" which is dependent on my work, weather, and life schedule on top of motivation, so rarely it's at a time I really want to do it and it takes an amazing amount of willpower to force myself to commit to that routine. If I take a day off or go on vacation, it's usually enough to knock me out of my routine and I find it really hard to funnel my energy back into getting on track.
Totally resonate with all this... like the language of “mode” - I rarely schedule things for specific times, and doubt it looks like I follow a prescriptive routine every day, but I know what my responsibilities are and how I’ll get them done. If I get asked to do a random thing without much time to contemplate and decide... FEELINGS. Many, many unwanted feelings.
@@kathleenpage2758 "If I get asked to do a random thing without much time to contemplate and decide... FEELINGS. Many, many unwanted feelings." -- in the capacity to which I work now, this is my bane of my existence; it's the worst part of bureaucracy.
I think another part of this video, while not entirely incorrect, might be mis-characterized. I think as an INTP, it's true that I dislike doing common maintenance, chores; it's not that I don't see that they need to be done nor is it that I think I need someone to "take care of me" as Nathan puts it in this video (that might be true for some, of course) but that I don't want them to interfere with what is currently consuming my attention and, and therefore, hate the imposition of dealing with them on me.
I know this has a point of contention with relationships I've had in the past -- especially if they're on ambiguous, open ended terms like "clean the house" -- I prefer to have it specified, delegated, and left up to me to when to take care of them. I know it sounds incredibly selfish but I think anyone in a relationship with someone like me might learn that it's easier to get things done in a mutually accepted manner if they're specified, enumerated, and delegated within a time frame that doesn't interfere in their mode of productivity and comfort -- even if it it is incremental.
When I was younger, I served in the military and while it might seem an unlikely vocation for an INTP, there was a level of comfort that I enjoyed with having these kinds of tasks delegated and specified in a manner where the decision making process was taken out of my hands -- when it became uncomfortable was when the real work was done and I was told that we needed to be "gainfully employed" which, to me, meant meandering and doing bullshit (or otherwise, make myself disappear). Conversely, I once had a civilian job that when I got hired, the president of the company said "we don't want you to work all day, we'd be happy if you got all of your work done in your first few hours of the day and spent the rest of the day throwing pencils into the ceiling". Until that changed, it was the best job I ever had -- it wasn't that I was throwing pencils into the ceiling when I was done, it meant that I could get the awful stuff out of the way and spend the rest of the day doing the stuff I liked to do in a productive manner.
I spent 6 months eating nothing but chicken flavored crackers. Because I didn't want to wash dishes. My dishes were clean. I often said that I was too lazy to make a mess. ~INTP
Infp in a relationship with and intp when you said you used to go to the store and just buy whatever in the moment lol he knew I needed milk but he also showed up with: flowers, me and this kids favorite flavored waters, a huge box of ice cream bars, and a chocolate bunny for each of the kids 😭❤❤❤ as an infp the random variety was hilarious but the fact that each item was purposed in such a sweet way and that he made mental notes of what we needed or like…AND the fact that I didn’t ask him to bring milk but he did it anyway… He’s the one❤ (intuitively however I knew this from our first date when our hands fit perfectly together. Sounds cheesy but it was a “moment”❤)
I'm an INTP and my wife is ESFJ. I have to say it is extremely convenient being with someone who is willing to take care of groceries, bills, all that mundane crap. Its important though that I make up for it in my own way and that I show appreciation. The showing appreciation part is something I have always struggled with, at least in past years. I've always just thought it was obvious that I appreciate it, lol.
ESFJ is better then isfj at thee point if love partner of an INTP
I am talking to an esfj but am reluctant on paper. She is good and seems to be interested in having logical convos, but I am not sure what is real and what is a front because she likes me. But this is something I've always struggled with do is there any advice
This is cool. My wife is an ISFJ-T and I’m an INTP-T. We get along extremely well.
Funny that you made that mention about how INTPs typically don’t believe in God. I was actually a pretty rooted atheist before I became a Christian. Now I love 3 things outside of my God and Wife. I love Theology, Philosophy, and Psychology. Those interest me far greater than innovations.
Im isfj. My bf is intp ....
Im worried. Im too illogical for him.
"I became Christian" lol
I found it funny that you mentioned that ISFJ pairs particularly well with INTP. As an INTP myself, one that has been dating an ISFJ, it has been the single hardest relationship that have ever been in. It certainly has its values (as with any relationship) but a defining characteristic about it is that we are opposites in every single way except for the introverted part BUT, as ISFJs are known to be the "helper" type that puts others before themselves so much that they can have trouble honoring their own time, Even this seems like we are opposites (as if I am an introvert and she is actually an extrovert). What's more, I've realized that the "N" function (i.e. viewing the world with theories, imagination, and concepts) is very much how I derive energy and satisfaction. Being with someone that sees this as useless rambling about things that don't actually exist is extremely difficult. I will admit though, being with someone that has the "J" function is a nice contrast to my disorderliness. But even then, I sometimes have to work with the insecurity of feeling like I need some kind of caretaker. The relationship has definitely been a valuable learning experience.
In retrospect the INTP/ISFJ combo might not have been the best one to cite as an example. It's really fascinating to hear your thoughts on this! ~ Nathan
@@lovewho I'm an INTP and my boyfriend is ISFJ. It's hard for me to understand his overly affectionate expressive love though he completely understands how and what i feel as we both know I'm 100% genuine. I'm currently having a lot of conversations to understand him more and more and the journey is beautiful
@@lovewho thanks Nathan. I do think that this particular pair had A LOT of positivity to learn from each other though. My experience was, at times, extremely rewarding, since I would expand her openness to outside-the-box thinking (as confirmed by her), and she would expand my capacity to lead first with empathy and put problem-solving aside. But...it was also extremely painful at times because we would sometimes be stretched to our limits.
@@HS-wu4el ya it is a beautiful journey. That's how I feel about my pairing with an ISFJ too
My INTP daughter is seriously dating a man who appears to be an ISTP. It appears they will be eloping at any moment. Haha! I never saw her forge an alliance like this before. Very amusing and they seem so happy.
No one will understand the strong attraction in this combo from outside looking in, but can confirm from my own experience, it is long lasting and intense union in a very low-key way.
An INTP here with ISTP mom. Our conversations are the best. As long as they have accepted each other's quirks, great potential
@@jooyeonhuh8242 INTP with ISTP dad. We are just cute dorks, when we find something interesting to talk about or figure out. He obviously has a more hands-on/practical approach, and I a more abstract one, so the available points of view are nearly endless. :)
Also being Fe out inferior function makes it possible for us to ignore feelings altogether. We know we love each other, and that's plenty for us, you don't have to say it out loud.
I see it as one of the best combinations. There might be some contradictions here and there but it's life it happens but they will be able to fight it because of similarity in thinking. And when they need their alone time she would do her Ne stuff and he - his Se . He might have cool sense of humour. My neighbour was in i s t p, she still is, she's just not my neighbour anymore, and we have had amazing time together. Her isfj mother said that we are weird but we were good together. Personally I think it has a potential to last forever.
I’m ENFJ and my mentor is INTP. He is constantly correcting my thinking and he’s right 99% of the time. That lead Fe exhausts me and I welcome any help exercising logic. The longer I know him, the more I grow as a person. I’m grateful.
Reclass, retest with a inner circle group of friends.
@@Roqjoru I tested ENFJ at college in the late ‘’80’s, by certified MBTI people, and by Dave & Shan with OP. I even asked the people that know me best and for 10-30+ years to describe my weak areas and have that to Dave & Shan. You can rest assured, I’m ENFJ.
I'm an INTP with an ENTJ girlfriend. We fit each other really well honestly but sometimes it's like her logic is backwards compared to mines and we're both right in some kinda way but are both too stubborn to say it. And something about her snarky attitude is just appealing but she also has very deep feelings that I sometimes never detect or don't take seriously until it's too late. 😅Also she's always getting up much earlier than me and making schedules for her schedules while I just kinda improvise and go with it until I have time to do me lol.
Basically my life, i wish i had a entj gf
Obviously my INTP boyfriend was speaking here, by an ENTJ gril
Hi intp, I love ya'll, your logic is strong and helps me understand the world better! 💞-infp
And i love you INFPs who help me understand how to behave properly in this crazy world
@@midoriemi3859 🧡
I love INFP's. So smart and super deep. ♥️
@@samf8887 🥺
@@andytheindividual3862 ♥️ from a female INTP 😎
I'm an INTP and ISFJs for me are among the most unlikely to partner up with. My mother is an ISFJ: I perceive her as being extremely controlling & we have no common interests to talk about. A Type I do tend to get along with well & could imagine a relationship with is the ESFP: not controlling, but down to earth, sensitive & capable of dragging you outside to do things - just what I need!
You have 3/4, trade the "J" for "P". Better balance.
Be careful with the "E"s, "I"s work good together.
Ad in a magazine for INTPs:
“This Christmas, give the gift of logic”
My Da Vinci! Would I spend a fortune on that for everyone ik!
INTP here and I'm married to ISFJ. We are very much opposites but since we have the same life goals, we compliment each other incredibly well.
Yeah but what if you didn't have it?
As an INFJ I'm 50/50 on attraction to INTPs. Sometimes I'm crazy about them and other times I get annoyed with their lack of caring or feeling. I almost always find myself attracted to ENTPs though. My sis who is INTJ is dating an INTP and they seem pretty happy together.
I'm an ENFP and I'm also attracted to ENTPs. Cheers to having the same taste.
I'd venture to say that often INTPs do care, but they either don't realize it or would rather die than let you see their weakness lol. We are not so great at expressing it even when we try. I've often had the experience of being taken aback by partners assuming I don't care about them. But unless they're vulnerable first and give me room to feel safe reciprocating, I probably won't. Part of why I love INFJs is that they often seem to know how I feel without me having to say anything, and they are good at revealing just enough to make you comfortable opening up.
@@heatherbryant4197 yeah I guess it depends on maturity and if they put effort into working on their empathy or feelings or at least displaying it.
In my experience as an INTP, I have lots of feelings but people don't take me seriously. Like they don't believe I'm going through something because I explain myself rather than crying or yelling. I get neglected and taken for granted and then people wonder why I have low sympathy. People rarely have sympathy for me, but they expect me to show sympathy for them.
This is not with everyone mind you. It's just some people that I have real difficulty communicating with, and vice-versa.
I like INFJs generally but the ones in my life are prone to projecting meaning onto words and actions that aren't there sometimes. I get mad when people try and put words in my mouth. But I usually get along pretty well with that type.
regarding cognitive functions INFJs are most compatible with ENTPs👀👀👀👀
interestingly, my girlfriend and i are both INTPs. our relationship is long-distance, though, so that cuts out the factors of having to go buy groceries, or even necessarily having super emotional conversations. we both function perfectly well on our own, but it's nice when we just come together and chat and spend time together. i actually think it has worked out super well - i know a lot of people say that LDRs are a terrible idea and never work out, but as people who are introverted and need a lot of alone time, this lifestyle works super well. when we hang out or talk, it's because we want to. both of us are engaged in what we're doing. i think we just compliment each other well. but like you say, i can't say for sure how much of this is to do with personality type, or just personality itself.
My partner is an ISFJ, and quite a mature, reasonable one. We benefit from one another in many ways. His social skills are like magic to me, as are my scheduling skills to him. We enjoy many mutual interests, creativity, harmony, as well as alone-time, deep conversations, ...
I enjoy his skill of creating a cozy environment, and he appreciates my "precision" as he calls it.
As for the INTP's flame thrower and unfilteredness, he likes the honesty and he's more than earned my respect for being fireproof and seeing through bullshit quite well himself.
The urge to correct the people i care about is strong indeed, but it can be conquered. The longer the lesson, the less likely it is to be absorbed. Sometimes it's best to figure out what's the first step and then show it, instead of saying it. Take the other person on the path where they learn it themselves, instead of having me explain it. Unless they are an INTJ, in which case i just explain it. INTJ-s are the easiest to get along with, but the most interesting people to me are usually the INF types. More challenging, more rewarding.
As an INTP i like ISTP and ENTP personalities😩
Glad I'm not the only about ISTP 😂
ISTPs are the only sensing types I can see to match with me INTP in a relationship (other than a friendship). Most of my friends have always been ISTPs: the coldness this type gives off attracts me and we share the same dark humor!
@@mariram7593 I've never experienced a cold ISTP. The one I was closest too was the warmest person I had ever met. It was refreshing how warm they were. But I might percieve Ti as warm for some reason. I tend to percieve all Ti Dom's as warm, ISTP is warmer and extra present, with that tertiary Se. I might be weird.
@@Gio-sx7kt of course you're weird, you're an INTP (I guess?)! Kidding
I find ISTPs cold at first, but they can actually reveal themselves as very caring people when you get close to them (basically when they choose you don't suck like other humans lol). I have this ISTP friend who isn't good with words at expressing her feelings, but she rememers or do things for me showing she cares with actions. I still wouldn't call an ISTP warm though as I'd do with a feeling type. But I don't want to generalise MBTI since, for instance, some ISTPs could be more in touch with their feelings than others.
@@mariram7593 I'm actually INFJ, I dated an ISTP at one point in time and they were particularly warm, and charismatic, which I attributed to their Se. I did have another friend that I think was an ISTP female that matches your description of your friend. She was very shy and to herself mostly, but liked to surf and had a unique talent for throwing large ceramic vases, which I think was a product of her TiSe. But to me she was warm, at least because I was a bit closer to her, but yeah a bit similar. I don't know if it's just that I look past the exterior in determining warmth, or maybe because I use Ti and just experience it as a well intentioned function, but yeah I'm also weird. 🤷
That's logical. Me too.
The INTP&ISFJ marriage I have followed very closely for twenty years and it seems quite painful for the ISFJ. Societal conformity and manners being very high on her list and the other almost at ENTP level of breaking them is constant battle. And of course Fe needs actual attention. But dinner is on the table.
Very good points.
Last line got me off guard lol
@@djdragons69420 🤭
Exactly. The only good part is a dinner...
I'm an ENFP female who's been in a relationship with an INTP male for 28 years. Sometimes I feel like speaking in generalities and he hates that. The thing I've tried to work with him on is to not insult me or others when he wants to make a correction. He really pisses me off when he starts our the correction with an outraged "God! That's so stupid!" It's taught me to try to have my backup ready when I do want to say something that contradicts what he thinks. And he loves my happy, go-with-the-flow nature. It's a pairing that works best when both partners behave in a mature (about their own shit) manner.
I would like to know more that how ENFP thinks about INTP as a complement
As I'm mature and experienced now-
I know now that what is imp and not imp in life for me.
As a INTP - (N+P) intuitions and perceiving are imp for me. And I think my partner should honor the same . Perceiving - to be open minded for new possibilities
And as an INTP to complement my weakness to strength of (E+F) - I am open to learn and grow my (E+F) aspects.
Some facebook friends even feel pissed off when I note that there is an error or misunderstanding in their data. Then they assume that I doubt their whole intention or issue they posted about. Strange.
As an INTP with ISFJ mother, I have my doubts on that being a good match. ISFJs will take care of things which INTPs appreciate. Neither type know what they really want on the Ni level. ISFJs with undeveloped Ne inferior really don't want to discuss the things that INTPs are usually into. There needs to be some Te or Ni to actually get somewhere with life.
My mom scored ISFJ on her 16personalities test and yeah. Growing up, we did get into long arguments over minute details, but the inferior Ne's lack of imagination and Si dom's rigid adherence to personal experience and rules, etc, was very painful to deal with. :)
Yeap. INTP with ISFJ mother as well. They are NOT even good for relationships. They have nothing in common.
Completely agree, there's nothing to talk about with her. She's not even excepting my interests not like being a participant but simply being ignorant.
INTP female with ISFJ mother too. First of all, I have not met ISFJ male. And let’s say if there were such males, I suspect they would be too grounded, boring and over emotional for INTPs🙀
He's completely wrong. I'm an INTP female and I hate all SFJs.
INTP... rationale has lead me to believe in God and this has lead to a pretty close relationship. It sounds irrational to the more atheistic view, but I've found that His understanding and patience has helped with many of my shortcomings. You don't have to believe me, but its as real as any other relationships with more ups than downs.
Fellow INTP who also believes in God. Atheism presupposes naturalism, which isn't rational at all.
@@bez1196 I agree with you fellow INTP. I don't find the atheistic arguments very convincing. On the other hand I'm also very reluctant in buying into stupid religious dogma, as my conception of god is based on my own philosophical reasoning. I just don't like to adopt a fixed belief system which is completely illogical.
My boyfriend (INTP) also believes in God as do I - and he came to this conclusion through rationalization as well.
@@jenchapple89 honestly, I don't see how people don't see the patterns
True enough, as ever but... sometimes the logician just wants to do the most irrational things (whether prompted by others or not) and to be hurt and damaged by doing them, only makes them more bitter and fearful of such emotionally charged realms.
Sometimes, an INTP cares enough to want to 'correct' people yes, but if they care even more that, they want to be themselves corrected. Logicians want to learn too not merely teach, and to be protected by another persons wisdom (probably emotional) instead of always relying on their own hard-won knowledge.
Its bad enough living in an irrational world, but when one is alone with logic and sustains oneself with it, it leads to a kind of emotional under-nourishment. We are a social species, after all. But being so built as to be so often alone and worse, lonely, its very hard indeed. And you can't reason yourself out of lonliness.
Crying doesn't solve anything which is of course logically true, but often, its all an INTP wants to do. I suppose it would take some even rarer type or a saint, to be bold enough to hold the INTP, while reason takes a little vacation.
I have yet to find such a person. And that hurts more than the usual sting of people being generally illogical.
Sometimes, I would rather be less logical perhaps more stupid and simple, if it meant, well... if it meant I could be more easily loved. I'm an INTP apparently, as y'all might have guessed by now, but frankly, I'd rather be something - anything - else, so that I wouldn't be so alone. I'm logical yes, but as Hume remarks, we are at the end of the day, creatures of and slaves to, our passions. And I so passionatly feel my own lonliness and alienation, that I can barely subsist on the consolations of logic and philosophy anymore.
It sucks.
I can relate and I'm an XNFP.
And your comment remember me of "Ignorance is bliss" by Kollektivet.
Somewhat agree and somewhat don't 🤔
I mean, yes, we are social beings and yes, it can be quite difficult to get along with an INTP and yes, I too sometimes thought that being a "less complex being" must be a bliss, but after thinking about it, I'd never want to exchange my clear vision for simple bliss.
I like to rely on myself, even though I dislike when everyone relies on me all the time (it's just too much). Feeling lonely usually has to do with "feeling misunderstood" and that's something we all as human beings, be it reluctant or not, will have to fight all our lives. Sometimes it'll be worse (especially when close people misunderstand) and sometimes it'll be absolutely fine and we can even laugh about it. Don't give up, move on and let every encounter or mishap in your life be a worthwhile lesson to you 😊
This is so deeply relatable.
@@valej9387 You're welcome, I think lol
Have you been reading my thoughts cause some things are what i have thought about too :(
I get along well with my ISFJ mother for the most part (really adore her), but sometimes... there are some very crazy thoughts in her head 🙄
The people I find most interesting and get along with exceptionally well: ENTJs 😂
Love ENTJ’s, married to one
@@tfranc347 Guess, you are having a great time together 😁
Wish you the best for all the coming years too and lots of fruitful conversations 😉
regarding cognitives functions ENTJs and INTPs are highly compatible. I can tell since I’m an ENTJ and my brother is an INTP and we get along quite well (most of the times). Although, I do think that I enjoy his company more than the way around lmao
@@sophiezhang7258 Hehehe I know what you mean, one of my best friends is ENTJ, we get along super well, for most of the time as well, but sometimes, she stops me from talking, because I get immersed too much in topics I like and that feels a bit bad at times, but it's never even near a critical point 😂
Leading a team with her was the best experience ever, those teams were always successful too 😁
Where do I find INTPs? I've never come across them (other than in engineering classes).
Wow, great video.I have a couple of friends that I think maybe INTPs. They are blunt, but very sweet. Thanks for the insight.
That is statistically unlikely. There is a high chance you have identified some of them.
@@JohnSmith-ox3gy Thanks for the heads-up, ? INTP ?
@@JohnSmith-ox3gy "statistically " what type of Si bullshit is this?
I am an ENFP and in by far the most satisfying, deep and adventurous relationship of my life with an INTP.
The issues we had to work through were more surface level - just understanding differences in communication style. I love that you say INTPs point out contradictions. Once he was pointing out my contradictions and I was like, “oh yeah, I totally contradict myself, it’s so human. I don’t judge myself or anyone for that”. And he was so psyched to know it didn’t hurt me and said it was freeing to know he could have his own contradictions!
He’s had to learn to trust that I express emotions just to express them, that they are not a tool to manipulate nor have agenda.
I have had to learn to trust and respect his pace which has taught me more patience and humility.
But fundamentally we are both independent and value the other’s individuality, freedom and space. We share the values of curiosity, questioning, and never-ending learning and growing.
And yeah, no food in the fridge, bills aren’t paid on time. But neither of us cares and seeing how bad the other one is at Si, we certainly aren’t trying to get the other to take care of that part of life for us!
As the ENFP in the relationship, yes, how did you get him to be okay with it? My INTP's rule about "no crying while talking because that's not fair" and his resentment of me bringing up issues from the past are feeling very unfair to me. I'm not supposed to talk when I'm upset, but once I've managed to get over it and am calm enough to discuss without tears, it's too late and I'm "dredging up the past"
@Rose Dreamsinger it’s interesting to hear another INTP feel wary about emotions being manipulative.
Well, first off, I may be older than many who watch these videos (I’m in my 40’s) so I can express difficult emotions without being in a temper tantrum state, so that probably helped. I think it helped that I let go of the need to “convince” him my feelings were valid, weren’t a ploy, etc.
I had good boundaries and wouldn’t participate in arguments that were circular or going nowhere. I would honor my own feelings and tell him he was of course free to think about it anyway he chose, as I don’t seek control.
Over time, he came to his own conclusion: his Ti figured out that based on a lot of logical evidence, it didn’t make sense that I was trying to “trick” him with my feelings.
We have come to see that both of us used to feel like the disadvantaged one who could be “tricked” by the other. I thought there were no ways to “prove” my feelings rationally, so therefore they wouldn’t be respected and I’d get walked all over, manipulated, etc. I’m glad we are through that phase and have built trust.
@@er6730 That all sounds really difficult and I can think of similar dynamics I used to have with my INTP.
First of all, I personally would not participate in a relationship “rule”. Rules in relationships aren’t healthy, but boundaries are. If he is unable to handle crying, then he can make a personal boundary for himself and leave the room.
As an ENFP, use your Fi to get in touch with your own personal values and boundaries. Are you willing and able to not cry when sad or hurt? If not, say so. It’s only from authentically expressing what we can and can’t do that we can work towards compromise. Without compromise, the relationship operates from a “sacrifice” mentality- one person sacrificing too much for the other. All we get from that is resentment and exhaustion.
I would also ask a rational question: “If we can’t look at/talk about the past, how can learn from it? If we can’t figure out what didn’t work well, how can we learn to do better?”
@@heartpoint5289 That's really helpful, thank you.
@@er6730 my pleasure and good luck!
I am an INTP and my bf is an ISFJ lol. He sometimes worries because we're different in many ways, but I think we complement each other quite well.
ISFP here dating an INTP. He values how empathetic, intelligent (mbti has nothing to do with intelligence - be careful with that one), kind and creative I am. I value his intellectualism, loyalty, conversational abilities and willingness to try to understand others. We’re both mature, have stable careers (I’m a nurse and he is an engineer), have the same values, have similar goals, and value alone time. He’s also quite a sweet guy despite his logical tendencies (yes, it’s possible to be both...).
Don’t let mbti I hold you back from forming a relationship with whomever you please. It is a lens through which people interpret the world in general, but it is not indicative of exact personality. Every person is unique within each category and capable of change &/or working on their weaknesses and faults.
Edit: Something I find extremely endearing about INTPs is their affinity to elaborate on thoughts, ideas, opinions, observances, etc. It makes for wonderful conversation and I’m not sure if this is something all, or even most, INTPs do, but the guy I’m dating certainly possesses this trait.
The affinity to elaborate is an INTP trait. We only do it when we feel there is value in doing so. Since your BF does this with you, it is a sign he likes, trusts, and respects you. The elaboration is sharing our thoughts, ideas, opinions, and observations and is one of those personal inner things we guard and filter from the outside world. Only select people get to see that side of an INTP. To an INTP, it is an intimate part of themselves they are sharing which shows their willingness to be vulnerable with you.
I'm not an INTP (INTJ here and our cognitive functions are so different) but I do relate with a lot of these statements! I repress emotions because I'm aware of how intense they can be and I'm afraid of them overflowing (proven to be true though...), I invest a lot of energy and time trying to give concrete solutions for people I care about, and, although not necessarily in a romantic sense, the one person I have secured the strongest relationship with so far is actually an ISFJ. As always, loving your videos!
Indeed, my sister is an INTJ as well and she's exactly like that, we share a lot of common traits, just that she's a lot more goal oriented and (luckily) gives me advice on how to reach my own goals that sometimes end up in a pile of research on "anything that caught my attention and interest" 😂
INTJs are ❤️
I notice that the emotions my INTJ significant other and I repress are very different. She's actually super shy and quite timid, even fearful, and hyper-feminine...on the inside...but behaviorally she's the opposite on the outside. She only lets out what's underneath with people she's genuinely close to. For me the instincts being repressed are more like unadulterated rage and insane first impulse to charge in where angels fear to tread...on the inside...but behaviorally I'm the exact opposite on the outside (the mild mannered cautious Bruce Banner meme is real). INTx emotions tend to be high-intensity instinct-level emotions, not nuanced like INFx's. The higher order mammalian emotional subtlety is almost missing in its entirety. =S
I think both INTx types (over)compensate behaviorally by means of their rational filters, but one for overactive "don't" instincts and the other for overactive "do" instincts.
Your sign in the background is awesome........ Live with no excuses and love with no regrets is sublime.
I am an INTP and my mother is an ISFJ.
Hell no.
Yeah your mother and idk 15% of the population?? Don't clump all ISFJs into your mother's behaviour. Also an ISFJ is good for you, not that you'll like it 24/7. Thirdly if you correct their thinking for about 3 years straight maybe you'll end up perfect.
I'm an INTP and I think I could only be with an INTJ, ENTJ, INFP, INFJ or ENTP. But you never know 🤔
@@arianam9977 I see Te domimants as the plague for a Ti dom. When it comes to your Ti they treat it impersonaly and their arguments are swallow at best. I mean you've been thinking a thing for a year and they say something like: oh yeah it's obvious, next subject. Of course the exact same thing happens backwards for emotional subjects. We're the shallow ones, they just like things more, deeper.
@@drosos_strength_coaching Are you talking about ENTJs? To be honest I haven't really talked that much with any ENTJ, so I can't give an opinion. But I'm talking with an INTJ and I like how he is so far. He's intelligent (though I'm more xd) and he has more (important) knowledge than me (which is cool). Plus he seems like a mature INTJ, as he told me he likes me and he's not as cold as INTJs are said to be.
@@arianam9977 I'm talking Te vs Ti in any place from 1st to 4th. One uses logic to fit in, to make and the other to stand out
I think INTP and ISFJ would make for a bad couple. One wants to break social boundaries, the other relishes within them.
Im an INTP and my mom is an ISFJ. We had the roughest time and my childhood wasn't too pretty. We literally spent years with a wall against each other (mostly my part) but now we were able to resolve our differences. Despite that, I can still find difficulty in communicating, it's like we speak different languages whenever we talk and when there is an issue it's kinda frustrating (since I focus on trying to find a solution whilst gathering important details and she tends to be emotional and redundant) but since I understand our differences (learning cognitive functions definitely helped), I try to be patient and steer the conversation to a more reasonable one (but obviously prolonged because she will throw irrelevant infos all the time)
Despite that, ISFJ being mostly caring and great with real-world mundane tasks really helps a lot, unfortunately, me and probably some other intps would fail to appreciate their efforts as they usually put efforts into things intps don't care about (social expectations, routines etc) but are still important to actually consider.
@@nyxcheshire4247 Thank you for sharing. I'm an INFJ with ISTJ parent and the difference between communication styles can really show sometimes. That's why I don't think IN types are really suited to IS-J types.
Blah Smith, father of my children is ISFJ, and he is the best match despite all his imperfections which make me crazy. He is my guide and he is also my caring nanny - and that is soooo nice. And, which is very interesting and I still can't solve how he does it - he easily handles me.
@@nyxcheshire4247 different languages is extremely correct. It's like when I say left, she hears wright and I'm like "wtf?" I appreciate what she's doing but she's doing the "wrong" thing.
INTP-ENTJ best couple ever.
True
Me too, so great
Exactly, need an ENTJ to stimulate my mind talk logically with me. They're too rare though.
Naw, too controlling and domineering.
I thought ISTP-INTP
But I guess that’s the reason they are hidden on the outside.
And here i am, an INTP (self typed) who typed his girlfriend as ISTP. From my experience: perfect match, although i find it slightly upsetting, that for her the is a 'perfect time' for everything and not a 'perfect circumstance' like for me.
I am sure she doesn't find certain traits of me charming, but if i were to list all of them that i suspect i would be sitting here a long time
Yeah, I would tend to agree. I'm an INTP and my sister is one of the few ISTPs I know. We get along pretty well, usually and she kinda keeps me sane and connected to the world. I think a mature ISTP is a pretty good fit for a relationship, at least for some INTPs.
@@thecoleopterist My old boss was an ISTP and we got a long super well. I think ISTP is the type that's the most NT without actually being NT. They don't use their imagination as often as we do, but they're nonetheless intelligent, quick, adaptable, and can often roll with the punches of an INTP.
I love ISTPs, amazing people, I wish I was them this is how I love them
Good video Nathan
-Nathan
Damn, I was supposed to put (-Intp) lmao
Well nevermind
-Intp
@@tatertotbri7081 lol
-Nathan
There *is* an edit button!
INTP’s emotion needs to be looked after as well as their every life. When an thinking and logical INTP can develop a mature emotion system, it’s beautiful.
So good to hear your caution about using MBTI to determine relationships! I always cringe when I hear people use personality type as some kind of relationship bible. It's terrible advice.
Case in point: almost every site that gives relationship guidance based on MBTI says that INTP and ISFJ are mortal enemies. I'm an INTP, married to an ISFJ for 19 years. Challenges? Sure. But it would be that way no matter which types we are.
Are you sure your partner isn't an ISFP?
She has never gotten that result.
@@FrankDAgostino77 I've never had intp result until I figured out what this test wants from me to say. It defined me as ixxj because ti is actually a judging function as well as fi so it has seen me as a judger but before I typed myself upside down so check out maybe there's something wrong because it kept saying I'm intj until I started to put neutral answers to the questions my Ti considered unclear. But if she's stuck on control then she's clearly ixxj to check this out bring a dog and watch if she treats a dog as a "dog" she's ixxj, as a human - she's not. (When I was about 10, we had a puppy and it was on the chain and he was blocking my way and badly scratching me but I couldn't help it and my isfj mother kicked his ass with her saviour control, I am able to control the dog as a jumper but she does it in autopilot, to be clear she doesn't have to actually hit the dog just show power and control). But I don't know how on 19 years you would not be able to figure out is she controling especially as an intp. But I also don't understand how you survive with that because when I hear isfj telling me what to do I'm not doing it as a result we fight. It's a constant beef. She's probably an amazing cook.
I am an INTP and I believe in God.
Brother ❤
How
@@arfajmind2984 is a matter of the environment one grew up in to believe.. i sometimes give this example that where there's light there's darkness and where there's darkness somewhere some how light is present because those two things need each other to exist
so?
@@driizzxoxo8751 how is that related to believing in God?
"if you contradict yourself, God help you - INTPs often don't believe in God"
I just want this on a T-shirt front - and back
No, not true for all, after all INTPs have and open door.
@@Roqjoru Logic says that God does not exist
i have a lot of diffrent relationship with diffrent types and i think the best type i enjoy talk to and being with its entj
and intjs
I think INTP's (like myself) also like anime...
I saw Uchiha in your name↑
@@nviolinist7328 I don’t like them -INTP
@@bagel7080 oK - INTP
@@bagel7080 very intp thing to say, actually
@@L.l.I.ia_N Really?
For me, investing any amount of time in another person is an indication of care. I am notorious for icing people out unless they are in some way important to me.
A sister of mine is physically unhealthy-- has been for decades-- and despite trying to assist her by talking to her about healthier habits, my extreme love for her eventually pushed me to intervene by having her live with me for 3 and a half weeks. After researching her ailments and natural ways we could counter/address them, I regimented her diet, her exercise, her stress management, and even her sleep. At the end of her time with me, she'd lost 27 pounds, reversed out of prediabetes, brought her blood pressure down to the point where her doctor was considering weaning her off blood pressure meds, she was sleeping better, had less severe bouts of emotional turbulence and was overall a more positive and playful person.
I loved, loved, LOVED being able to assist her in this way, but eventually I needed my apartment back. I craved getting back to my own individualized mental, physical and emotional rhythms, even if to others they could be perceived as haphazard.
To care more about someone than they care about themselves, is self-abuse.
@@exnihilonihilfit6316 - - That's a rather problematic statement. More nuance is required.
Occasionally, prioritizing the needs of others over one's own needs, especially if meeting the needs of others do not lead to self-neglect and/or self-abuse, is healthy in an interpersonal regard. Those who are unwilling or incapable of consideration of the needs of others are usually egotists to the point where they are detrimental to themselves and others.
me an INTP married to an ESFJ. haha the best we have the same functions but in reverse. I learn a lot about Fe and he learns some Ti attributions like problem-solving. Also, he tolerates my Ne and gets used to my craziest ideas I have at 1am but as he sometimes can't leave me alone... he deserves to hear those ideas XD
As an Intp humanoid type with a crush on a ESFJ this is the way to go. Nothing more spicy, never a dull moment
It always fascinates me how spot-on the vids are and how understood I feel. Like, I just wanna send them to my friends every time they don't get my behavior, lol
Same 🙂
I have read a lot of comments on the pairing between INTP and INFJ and the attitude they have shown. So, because people actually take it as a given that a person is what they say they are, they rarely check the veracity of it. And this is not only to be applied on certain types, but rather all. Trust only the knowledge of the functions and how they work, not what other people say. They might be confused about the functions they are using. A bit of skepticism goes a long way. And if you can’t really understand a certain type, try observing the sort of reasoning they have as a fictional character in a book, movie, … Either way, having a brother who is an INTP and me being an INFJ, I know that the reason we both can function well together is due to our shared judging functions, yet balance our approach due to having different perceiving functions. While my brother has a chill attitude overall, mine is more motivating and driven. People stating an article they have read on those types being referred to as Golden because of the mutual admiration towards higher use of either Ti, or Fe, perhaps should try to switch perspective: our cognitive functions don’t work one at a time. There is no play button, or pause one we get to press at will. Functions exist and interact mutually. The difference is ultimately in the way those function can manifest themselves, not how much, or little we use them. It is how we use them that matters. Even though there is a system most people use and rely on to make sense of the functions, in order to truly get to the bottom of things, try deconstructing it all, and then put it back together making sure that you have reached an understanding of the structure. And finally, I will share a personal opinion on INTPs. They can be quite easygoing, adaptable, kind, caring. So, I do believe that they can get along well with people who have different personality types in any kind of relationship - be it family, romantic one, friendship,… Nothing can ever stop them.
I’m INTP, and my soulmate is also INTP. We started from normal friendship, and gradually went deeper. It took us very long time to realize that we actually love each other.
INTP with ISTP partner ... we don’t argue often, but when we do, it is epic. My superior verbal jousting skills combined with emotional self-control are deliciously infuriating.
I bet it's true. My favourite couple is istpxintp don't understand why people don't think it's perfect...
I'm an INTP and my wife is an ISFJ. I think it's a good match but, when I try to explain something to her, I feel she doesn't understand that logic and being right is more important to me than being nice. Sometimes I try to agree with her on something that she is explaining to me, and when I rephrase what she said with my own words, to see if I'm understanding correctly but trying to apply logic to it, she thinks I'm trying to argue against her point. We definitely don't think the same way but we complement each other in lots of ways.
This would explain why I finally met my mate at age 38. Took me a while to find that perfect person for me, but find them I did! Married and extremely happy now.
I’m 34 so maybe there’s still hope?
@@PS-lv1mrOf course
INTP-ENFP is fun
INTP : for me, by far the biggest challenge in a relationship is that a relationship needs to be taken care of. By going on dates, caring about anniversaires, going to familly diners, being there at all during the day instead of in my head.
Yes, the biggest challenge is being there at all. I have had almost no relationships, and friendships that ended because of fights. They ended because i didnt take care of that relationship enough. Friends i didnt contact enough....
Then again i have been described as arrogant and unsensitive several times. The irony is that its just as true as it is wrong.
Here I am, same problem until I reached the 30y old, when huge traumas made me feel much more close to other people and feelings exploded all in once. Now the problem is that the Fi sucks and I sound awkward when trying to understand the others feeling. It's a challenge man. It's like feeling "sadness" in a big pot where everything is mixed together and there's connection between the most ridiculous things. Damn. Hard. It takes a lot of time to be conscious, but each minute spent on understanding human nature is totally worth it.
Istp here , same man , and the worse , I am a girl , for some reason I think people expect girls to be more caring regarding the things you mentioned ,ahh , I don't know
INTP Female here and this is so true for me. I just don't care about relationship maintenance.
Know exactly what you mean. I consider myself extremely lucky to have the best friend I have. To the point I don’t feel need for anyone else.
INTP here, a good friend of mine was ISFJ at a time when I didn't have any other friends. They would always remind me of important stuff that I forgot about and they cared about me. Sadly, they went to a different school and we rarely talk now.
INTP with an ISTP woman, long term marriage. Intellectually we have a great time, but being intimate together is impossible and has the been the bane of our existence. Lots of resentment that we never manage to work out, no matter how much we both understand the problems.
I am an INFJ married to an INTP. This was VERY accurate.
What's his/her best quality as an INTP?
Hi there, @@midoriemi3859. I'd say that his best quality, is his ability to solve problems .He doesn't just solve them, he will come up with the most efficient, original, and precise solution for the problem at hand. He will even invent new tools for his solution. I also really appreciate the deep conversations that we have together, he is my best friend. We've been together for 13 years now.
@@Julie-v5y Aaaah cute
Hey Nathan!
Could you make more ENFJ-content?
I'm an INTP, and i have a ISFP Friend that Is exactly what i like in a relationship: when we met, she sent me a video and tell her what i think about it, i said that it wasn't my thing and all that stuff, but i was surprised that she didn't felt offended of what i said... I love her so much.
INTP here married to an ESFP. Love the woman. She gives me my freedom and alone time. I still haven't worked her out. Never bored and we can talk things through. Very much like Ying and Yang. We still even flirt a lot. Oh boy does she drive me nuts with how forgetful she is. But that's about it. She can't stand how clumsy and I am. It's something we have learned to live with. The first 2 years were the hardest but now in our 6th year and feel more deeply attached every day
Personally, my mom is an ISFJ (i’m quite sure about this), my brother an INTP and I’m an ENTJ. I find that both my mom and I enjoy my brother’s company a lot, but I don’t really know if he feels the same way. He’s hard to read. But he definitely doesn’t always enjoy my mom’s company since she can be really pushy and impulsive about other people’s matters. I’ll have to disagree about INTPxISFJ
Yeah, pushy is the word.
Was married to an ISFJ, It can work, sort of. The biggest thing missing for us is the abstract conversations and spontaneous things. We try to bring that to the table, but with mixed results. ISFJs just end up nagging us over Si things
I'm an INTP-A who has over 90% in Assertiveness and thinking and i believe in God. HOWEVER, I always question stuff and rules in religion.
"Why This" "Why That"
"What's this's use?" etc..
Same. I’m a Christian INTP, and I’m always questioning things. I could not stop researching until I find a good and reasonable answer to something, whether it be a certain verse in the Bible, or the church. I still hold God close to my heart, because honestly He is the reason why I always thirst for knowledge
I think that inxj are actually more disbelieving at that point. It's easier for them to believe in aliens then to believe in God. I think it's easier to make them believe in anything else...
“Things INTPS do well in relationships: The urge I had to end the video there... was strong”
As a fully non-superstitious INTP I can't imagine being married to someone who believes in any religion, superstition or conspiracy theories. I couldn't fully respect them. They can be irrational sometimes about everything else but I want a fully sane, logical partner in general. Luckily, I somehow mananged to find a single such person on planet Earth and we've been happily married for years. People like this are incredibly rare, unheard of. I couldn't pass such opportunity.
After reading a lot of comments here, maybe some of you should pay a bit more attention not to fall into an "I'm smarter than pretty much everyone" mindset.
I wrote it like that instead of the classic "I'm better than everyone" because many people feel kind of both superior and inferior to others; also, many people do realize that there are obviously very smart, or just smarter, people in this world, but at the same time they feel intelectually superior to almost everyone they know that doesn't think like them and can even act like everyone is subpar.
Of course this isn't specifically just an INTP thing, nor are all INTPs like this, or fully like this. Of course, I'm not saying you're not smart either, or that you should be with someone you don't even enjoy a conversation with or you're not compatible with.
Just remember that your intelligence will naturally show without you constantly putting emphasis on it.
Basically what I'm saying is be careful not to become a "r/iamverysmart" kind of person, you don't need it. Also, always remember that you *can* be wrong, about a whole lot of things.
I'm sorry if I sounded demeaning or anything like that, it's just that this is something I've also seen irl in people (to an extent in myself too) a whole lot, much worse than here, and it's sad. It's sad that some people feel like they need to be preachy to show they're smart, or that they tie their identity and worth to this label of "intellectually superior". Or for some to think that being an INTP makes them intellectually superior, in the same cliche way as let's say those "not like other girls" type INFPs in some comment sections.
There are also so many things one can learn by being around you INTPs. Seeing your passion is motivating.
Anyway sorry for writing a whole ass novel lol, and if anyone got here, thank you for reading!
Indeed, the wise know that they know nothing 😁
Even in my field of research I learn something new everyday from various people of various ages and various fields of research. I appreciate their flexible mind, their intelligence and intellect, but I also appreciate street-smart people, as long as people appreciate logic, thinking in general, as long as they are willing to learn and understand, that's intelligence and that should be appreciated.
"a "r/iamverysmart" kind of person" THANK YOU i couldn't put my finger on it!
I agree. It's always extremely important to me to remember that there are many kinds of intelligence and ways to measure it. I love seeing different people's perspectives on things.
@Krugerツ True words.
I don't see people say it, it might seem like that but how the type that feels like it's not smart enough claim that they are? That's the perception other types have on us but it's clearly false.
My husband is an ENTJ - we have enough interest in common that we can never run out of things to talk about, but can also enjoy comfortable silence. He has his own time consuming interests which leaves me plenty of personal space. We don't exactly share the same values on everything, but we do respect and understand the merits of each-other's opinions. We do take the time to thoroughly discuss and form a compromise when it comes to important things - but mostly we are just happy to let each-other be. He gets me out of the house and makes me interact with people, which I recognize is ultimately a good thing. To be honest, I'm not sure what I have to offer, but at least I can make him laugh.
Interesting about the isfj being a good match...my parents are an intp-isfj pair. They've been married for over 4 decades. Sometimes it's baffling to me how they get along so well, as on the surface they seem to be speaking different languages.
Advice from an older infp. Not trying is worse than failing. Regret is the worst thing ever ❤
I've only known one ISFJ well and really like her, but I can only see an enormous intellectual mismatch between ISFJ and INTP, on both level of interest and capacity. I'm not sure about this pairing, although I am a big fan of both types that i've known irl. from, intj
I have chosen that a relationship is too draining of my life force; those energies are best to be conserved and invested in me. I have actually evolved out of requiring, desiring, or needing to be in one, and that, actually, suits me just fine. Solitude is Bliss, but not for all.
As someone that went through 18 years of hell with an ISFJ, DON'T DO IT!!!! They need to have things done the right way, which is there way. Si hero can't tolerate INTP quirks. It affects their acceptability in their head. ISFPs are much better. No common traits so your Ne and Ti are a mystery that appeals to their sense of adventure. You also cover each other's blind spots as your parent functions are the other's trickster function. Lots to learn from each other if you aren't afraid to show feelings and they can receive wisdom from your Ti.
So True !
I am in process of divorcing my ISFJ just after 1.5 yrs of marriage. Maybe staying with her for long during corona period escalated the conflicts.
One day my sister litrally cried when I explained her how she was wrong logically(withous considering her feelings). Although she accepted her mistake, my rationality still hurt her. Sometimes we gotta put our rationality aside in relationships. Dont be so harsh on the person for being illogigal. just know that most people cant think logically like you and thats okay.
Mistakes INTPs make in relationships: *Being in them in the first place.*
"If they're investing the time to correct you, it's actually a sign that they care"
Me: So in other words *"INTPs show that they care by correcting your faulty logic"*
YES
Always my main takeaway and main deterrent
Yeah. If I don't care about someone I see no further point in communicating with them, especially when they're logically disabled
@@johannchin6431 some broken circuits just aren’t worth fixing
@@johannchin6431 same dude
I'm bored by ISFJs after a while.. I don't need someone who just brings me food, I need to stimulate my Ne 😂
Be honest, you got lured by the food
@@chrisb9143 😂😂😂
@@micohabit what if they second function is actually Si?
I'm INFP and my INTP new friend of 2 months asked me out for a movie yesterday. He has been calling me every single day and we text and have intresting conversation until midnight every night. Sometimes we have little debates to keep things intresting. I've come to really like him. I really enjoy being with him and we have a lot in common. I'm curious to see how it goes. If anyone has any tips for a very first date (like, very, very first) in general or when it comes to INTPs, I'd be extremely grateful.
seriously. never met someone who talks so specifically and in detail about intp.... u must be an intp ,,, at least,, if not, ure amazing
I never dated before, a girl just saw me shying and thought my smile is cute... then she adopted me, now I am marrying the first girl who adopted me☺️
Sounds like an ntj or SFP lol
@@kurodesuuuu I am An INTP
@@gauravrajak007 I'm talking about your gf (nfj and SFP are both high compatibility with you ,btw)
1:30 I didn't even know that judging myself for emotions/trying to think my way out of emotions was a common INTP thing.... I'm quite self-aware but even I didn't catch this
What's with all the picking on ISFJs, people? Just because they are different from an INTP? It doesn't give them less worth or value to be the type they are. They are as much needed as any other type out there, stop judging start observing, develop an understanding of others and why they may act the way they do. There's a reason for everything, it's just hidden sometimes. No type is really stupid, they just think differently. What's stupid are those people, and I srsly don't give a damn on their types, that don't think or think they know it all (that can be any type out there). The one thing we should distrust most is ourselves and our judgement. Falsify (yes, as in statistics) whatever you think, it helps.
Someone can throw rocks on me but I think the most stupid type is actually my personal favourite isfp. I love they because they are very different from INTP they are actually the most opposite type I absolutely love them but they are dumb as shit. But it makes them funny as shit.
did not come here to be called out, but um i feel personally attacked
rekiiii
“INTP’s aren’t robots, they are reluctant humans.”
This is so good! I’ve been called a robot so many times in my past relationships. I care I just show it differently.
I'm an INTP that married an ENTJ. 7 years now. I think we INTPs do well with someone high energy and commanding, but not needy. The ENTJ does not need us to be a part of their external life and will just tell us what needs to be done. The ENTJ gets a compliant minion at home that they can occassionally consult. It all works out.
INFP with an INTP husband. If you contradict yourself, God help you indeed...
Lol fear us mortals
😂😂😂👌👌👌
Lol i cant stop laughing at this i can hunt the contradictory person down until they beg me to stop 😂😂😂😂😂
😂
Lol! Yes to this all! Loved this...self-ironically, of course. 😉
Seriously though, as an oddly friendly INTP who *still* experiences those awkward moments when I sense people are thinking that I'm thinking/saying "too much", we should try to remember that everyone has thoughts "that matter", be they logical or illogical (usually the latter and usually repetitively so 🙄). Be generous when/if they might struggle to express these thoughts/feelings that they have. The latter two things aren't separate anyway (no, really, they're not. I swear. 😆).
We INTPs need to avoid giving into an easy temptation to "correct" everybody---unless they're in true imminent danger; or only after we've listened very carefully, and have been asked for the assistance of the clearness of our thoughts that we do tend to cultivate; and, above all, we know in our minds-hearts that it's genuinely coming from a place of care.
So use language that says that outright. Perhaps, "I truly, really care about you. Tons. So see that buzzsaw you're about to plow into for, like, the 70th billionth time? Please don't do that, as we discussed. Please turn around and go waaaay in the other direction so that you avoid an unnecessary and expensive trip to the ER. I love you. I think."
Laugh--a lot! 🤣🤣🤣 Do it in your room by yourself! Seriously---practice laughing! Get in the habit of just laughing like an absolute lunatic for no freaking reason at all. You'll find this person in you who's softer, funnier and much, much sillier than you thought, who takes great joy in a whole bunch of things that have nothing to do with INTPs' favorite "world of ideas". That person will shine through whenever needed.
So much irrationality rules the day in nearly aspect of life out there now. Me? I feel so much I've been "box turtling"--a lot. But I've also made an effort to poke my head out of that protective shell--and it's proven to be very rewarding every time. So, relax, go out and "play"! Find "playmates" to join in. They'll come out to play with you, too.
Apologies for the length! Much love to all from an INTP who occasionally gets her nose out of her books, sticks her head and legs out her comfy, wee turtle shell, and goes out to play in the sunlight. 🌞