55 Greatest James Bond One-Liners
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 5 มิ.ย. 2024
- Bond has been quipping since 1962, so we thought we'd compile our favorite (and what we think are the best) one-liners into one video. Enjoy!
End screen music by Andrew Applepie
andrewapplepie.com/
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0:00 Introduction
0:16 THE SPY WHO LOVED ME (1977)
0:36 FOR YOUR EYES ONLY (1981)
1:28 THUNDERBALL (1965)
1:48 DR. NO (1962)
2:03 THE WORLD IS NOT ENOUGH (1999)
2:20 THE MAN WITH THE GOLDEN OUN (1974)
3:08 THE LIVING DAYLIGHTS (1987)
3:52 ON HER MAJESTY'S SECRET SERVICE (1969)
4:19 LICENCE TO KILL (1989)
4:27 DIAMONDS ARE FOREVER (1971)
4:51 TOMORROW NEVER DIES (1997)
6:28 MOONRAKER (1979)
6:38 A VIEW TO A KILL (1985)
6:56 GOLDENEYE (1995)
8:44 GOLDFINGER (1964)
8:59 DIE ANOTHER DAY (2002)
9:16 CASINO ROYALE (2006)
9:29 OCTOPUSSY (1983)
9:35 NEVER SAY NEVER AGAIN (1983) - บันเทิง
I think what makes James Bond one liners so great is that he is saying them for his own entertainment. He does not care if anyone else hears them or approves of them. It is also a way for him to unwind from the stress of almost being killed and the stress of having to deservedly kill the villians. It is his way to reboot his psyche.
Is that a camerman in the tree on the left at 0:26 I see ?
That or he is just finding a way to comment on each scenario and he's just really clever about it. It's really not as clear cut as you make it out to be.
Good take
I approve of your analysis.
*hanging on for dear life*
“Hang on James”...
“The thought had occurred to me”😂
Best one imo
I would have pushed him off.
@@gjaeigjiajeg Why
Watched that exact scene just before reading yout comment and this is the best one lmao
" Yea i know him his name is Jaws and he kills people " 😀
Yep saw that and was about to say Roger Moore definitely delivers these lines the best.... however I think they missed the best "But James I need you".... "So does England!"
“That last hand nearly killed me.” Just brilliant
My favourite part of this is the fact he says a one liner when there's no one around to hear it.
John McGrath that’s cause Bond is cheeky like that. He doesn’t need anyone to be around to validate him.
@@addisondebter9468 when I do that I get called mental
God hears all my one-liners.
@Castle Bravo its a joke, loser.
@Castle Bravo OK, Dunbar
"You'd miss me"
*BANG*
"I never miss"
Yeah well she's at point blank range
Looking for seashells??
No, I was just looking.
kandang ha
Aditya Sanjay It means he was looking at the girl singing and picking shells. Because he finds her sexy
That’s my favorite one, too
@@ChuckBeefOG lmao same
@@ChuckBeefOG Ursula Andress is 83 now.. but yeah, a time machine would definitely be necessary
“That’s a smith & Wesson and you’ve had your six” is probably the smoothest line in any movie!
💯💯
Explain this one to someone who isn’t a gun nut
Terrance Johnson basically in the scene. The guy sneaks in with a gun! This particular gun can only hold 6 bullets! That being said bond works out that when he goes for the gun. He’s already used all of his ammunition. Which is why he says “you’ve had your six” and smith and Wesson is the maker of the gun. Hope that sums it up for you.
@@cierangray9528 except its clearly a Colt .45
Echoed in Living Daylights when Brad Whitaker says: You've had your eight, now I have my eighty.
In Thunderball, when Bond puts the woman on the chair, and says "Do you mind if she sits this one out? She's just dead." I died at that 😂
You want to sit as well?
@@fernwhite9158 I don't know what you mean, but I feel threatened
@@thegentleman4874 you said you "died" the lady from Bond died and Bond said she has to sit. So I basically asked do you have to sit as well.
No matter don't mind me I just have shitty sense of shitty humour.
@@fernwhite9158 oh I understand - I'm just a bit slow in terms of understanding jokes.
Maybe it should have been she's just dead on her feet?
I always liked the line in Never Say Never Again where Bond is told that his health is poor because of Turkish cigarettes, martinis, red meat, and white bread. Bond responds with, "I shall have to cut down on white bread."
“That’s a nice little nothing you’re almost wearing” I’ve really gotta try to sneak that into conversation sometime
"Provided the collars and cuffs match" is a better one.
They kind of swiped that line from a better one in An American in Paris:
"That's quite a dress you almost have on. What holds it up?"
"Modesty."
That was my favorite one. He then finishes his remark with "I approve."
Lmao.
I have!
" I'm Mr kill."
" Now there's a name to die for"
Love it
I like the quip by Bronson after the pen grenade exploded.
"Don't say it."
"The writing's on the wall."
I think Desmond Llewelyn was genuinely laughing at that one. I doubt his reaction was scripted.
"The pen is mightier than the sword"?
So is the rest of him
I think it took a few takes - Pierce breaks character
*In a confession*
Bond: Forgive me father, for I have sinned.
Q dressed as a priest: That's putting it mildly 007.
Aryaman What movie?
@@NeoArashi For Your Eyes Only
Dion Snijders Oh. Been too long sunce I watched this one XD
This one always cracks me up. Best Q quote ever.
@@EmmaSaints I heard that was intended to be M, but the actor was unable to be there for the filming.
Sean Connery is the GOAT of Bond. His delivery and timing are dark and funny at the same time. He's the perfect balance of Bond that has made all the movies cool in the pop culture. He's the reason why Bond movies are cool.
Him and Roger Moore were the best
It's Daniel Craig for me!
@@ishaan2863 he does very well indeed, although he isn't the most goodlooking of the Bonds
@@tabaksmozaiekvirus1715 its never about the looks, I think he portrayed the bond very well, he is one of the best action stars, judging from the movies.
Also, he gives people like me hope, who once felt inferior due to their height, I'm 5'10 too you know lol😄
@@ishaan2863 im 5'8"...
The beauty about every actor who has played bond? They have all brought something different and unique to the roll.
Fantastic.
Connery : the classic Bond
Lazenby : the ignored Bond
Moore : the witty Bond
Dalton : the one-liner Bond
Brosnan : the funny Bond
Craig : the vulnerable Bond
And now, we're waiting for the gentleman Bond.
what I love about James Bond one-liners is they're silly but still witty
"She always did enjoy a good squeeze" gets me every time 😂
J-800 Model HaHaHa Brosnan bro!
"That's a nice little nothing you're almost wearing" is my favorite
"You don't need the gun...commander."
"That depends on your definition of 'safe sex'."
@@macsenplays all of his lines in Goldeneye were, well, gold, especially the "no more foreplay" line to conclude that scene
James Bond stiff ass Brit
Fun Fact: Credit must go to Sean Connery for his ad-libbing of many of Bond’s famous one-liners and witticisms in the early films. His contributions are where it all began.
Yes, Sean Connery is the Best Bond. The rest had to basically follow his blue print.
A great addition to the Bond films.
Terence Young is involved in that.
It looks like Sylvia Trench is the one who led Bond to say "Bond, James Bond" because she is the one who says it as "Trench, Sylvia Trench" that Bond immediately copies into "Bond, James Bond"
Top comment 👌
Yep, and the timing was because Connery wasn’t able to do the line the way the director wanted it: so they had him snap his lighter shut before continuing.
It's interesting that Sean couldn't get the line right--extremely nervous. So Eunice had to help him walk it off. They came back a bit later and he got on the first try.
*and her last name is coat*
I love Dalton's exasperated, laboured delivery of "He got the boot!" with "Boot!" emphasized. People often describe him as humourless but I think the humour's still there, just not necessarily with the tongue and cheek delivery of other Bonds.
"Do you lose as gracefully as you win?"
"I wouldn't know, I've never lost"
Love that, so witty 😂
"You can't kill me, you'd miss me"
Bond: "i never miss"
next scene
"You missed mister bond"
Take a giant step for mankind.
weird screaming while falling into space*
@@eoinreen8808 i wish he would say ''i gave him some space''
Bond: "Did I?"
I guEss yOu NevEr mIss Uh
I still love the line from John Cleese's Q in the movie where he is introduced:
"Ah, the famous 007 wit!" *pause* "Or at least half of it."
HAH! Savage!
Roger had the most - of course he was the most light hearted Bond so it worked extremely well. RIP Roger/Sean ...my two favorites
I always thought Pierce Brosnan could have been as great a Connery. I remember being so excited when he got the role. Unfortunately, they never gave him the scripts. They had already started slowly morphing the character out of all semblance to James Bond.
Secret agent "dad jokes".
all dads watched bond movies, that is where they got them from,
Ye, im 25-y old and i use dad jokes on women. Works like a charm (most of the time)
The whole idea of "dad jokes" is millennial BS. They're just jokes.
Your sister doesnt count.
It was the '60s..'70s
0:43. The only time in movie history that a car goes over a cliff and doesn't explode.
John Oberst sad and true
Shareem Ibitsfala neither of you have seen it’s a mad mad mad mad world
Fast 7
I was SO waiting for it to explode. I've even seen the scene before and I was still assuming it was about to explode.
Spoiler alert: Duel 1971
Who's here after Sir Sean Connery passed away??
RIP legend
Two other Bond legends passed away. Roger Moore in 2017 and Desmond Liewelyn, our beloved Q for 17 movies in 1999. Someone should make a videos of all the Q quips.
"Really double-oh-seven!"
"I haven't any time for these adolescent antics!"
"Don't touch that! That's my lunch!"
@@Animeaddiction 🙏
@@Animeaddiction Why aren't you that somenone?
“My name is bon-“
“Names is for tombstones baby”
Best Line from any bond movie ever
Woman, hands Bond a balance sheet: "Would you like to check my figures?"
Bond: "I'm sure they're perfectly rounded."
My favorite will always be Sean Connery’s line in Goldfinger:
Stewardess: “ Can I do something for you Mr. Bond?”
Bond: “JUST a drink”
CLASSIC!!!!
5:26 "Stinging in the rain?" "That's not funny 007." Yes it is! 😂
HILARIOUS 😅😆😂😂😂😂
RIP Desmond Llewellyn or however its spelt. He was the best Q, fucking loved him
@@DittoGTI He was a great Q all right, always quick to castigate 007:
007: Have I ever let you down?
Q: Frequently.
But my favorite Q is Ben Whishaw's Q in Skyfall:
Q: 007 - I'm your new quartermaster.
007: You must be joking.
Q: Why, because I'm not wearing a labcoat?
007: Because you still have spots.
@@georgehenderson7783 Nah Desmond was always the goat. And he did it for 30+ years
@@DittoGTI That he did!
3:20 "That's a Smith and Wesson, and you've had your six" was Bond's most calm and merciless killing and it was in the very first Bond movie - Dr. No.
yes, he seemed to portray the natural killer there, hardly even acting.... the way he flinched as he pulled the trigger, like it was so natural for him... perfect timing.
My favorite line is from Golfinger. When James is about to be cut in two by the buzz saw asks “what do you expect me to do talk? Gold finger replies “no I expect you to die.”
👏👏 that is fantastic
Also, how about
Tan-Sun: "Time to face destiny"
Bond: "Time to face gravity"
Tan-Sun: plummets to his death 🤣♥️
That's a goldfinger line not a bond one
Thats mine too.
Along with (Bond to Domino) "You swim like a man" (Domino to Bond) "So do you".
When I was wheeled into surgery a few years ago, I said it looked like a scene out of James Bond... then I looked at the surgeon and asked, "Do you expect me to talk?" He had to bite his tongue so as not to say the reply. ;)
I love that you include the context for them. Not just the clip.
And “SWITCH THE BLOODY MACHINE OFF” is obviously the best. 😂😂😂😂😂
you left out the best one:
On Her Majesty's Secret Service - "This Never Happened To The Other Fella"
Agreed. That was a real breaking the fourth wall moment (c.f. Deadpool). Also a foreshadowing of things to come, as it would eventually become standard that the lead actor gets replaced periodically, resulting in comparisons of Bonds.
@@gamerg0 James Bond is a Time Lord
The droleness of a Moore sometimes with eyebrows, the wry scottishness of a Connery, the acerbity of a Craig or a Dalton with a hitman passas. The charm of a succinct Brosnan. You choose and of course not forgetting Mr. G. Lazenby on her majestys secret service with a smooth nonchalance.
Moneypenny: "James where are you"
Bond getting frisky with a college girl: "oh Moneypenny I'm just over here at Oxford brushing up on a little danish"
Moneypenny: "you always were a cunning linguist James"
I think she was a foreign language professor lol
Would make more sense
Moneypenny turns around and sees M. "Don't ask." "Don't tell."
@@johnstapleton7305 don't own a kite
I have to say.....IMG!! 😍
"you always were a cunning linguist James" - That was another line that slipped right by the American censoring.
It’s a shame I’ll never have a reason to use these quotes. Probably won’t see a man in feathers fall down a cliff
@@mE-up7tq The fact that you have deadpool as your pp makes this even funnier haha
Hahahaha!!
ha na very good
3:57 that was BRUTAL! 😂
Didn't like the delivery icl. Never liked Lazenby at all
Do you know him?
Bond: "Not socially. His name is Jaws and he kills people."
Always been one of my favourite lines. It's just so casual.
Jaws was the coolest!!
Favorites:
“Shocking. Positively shocking.”
“I must be dreaming.”
“I think he got the point.”
“Keeping the British end up, sir.”
“Oh, he had to fly.”
“He had no head for heights.”
“Well, you know what they say about the fittest.”
“No. For me.”
“Backseat driver.”
“I never miss.”
“Sorry. That last hand nearly killed me.”
“Now the whole world’s gonna know that you died scratching my balls!”
I used the point one after in cooling class someone sliced their finger open
The last one was the best
"Mr Solo had a pressing engagement " - Goldfinger
I think Q had the best all-time line at the end of Moonraker:
Freddy Gray: "What's Bond doing?
Q: "I think he's attempting re-entry, sir"
"Did I?"
"Sergeant, make sure he doesn't get away."
"Very novel, Q. We must get them in the stores for Christmas."
"I sincerely hope so."
"You don't believe me, do you?"
"The deck was slightly stacked in my favor."
"How about an earthquake?"
"Don't tell me you're not insured."
"Just being disarming, darling."
"It looks terribly difficult. No, it isn't, is it?"
"No, I know a little about women."
"What kept you?"
"I think he got the point"
Arguably one of the best James Bond one-liners of all time
The late great Sir Roger Moore was always the funniest and the best at delivering one liners.
"All those feathers and he still can't fly." Years ago when I first watched that movie, I thought that line was funny as heck. Lol
@@asmartbajan It still is.
Although not strictly speaking a Bond line my favourite is from Goldfinger when he is about to be cut in half by the laser. “ Do you expect me to talk Goldfinger?” “ No Mr Bond I expect you to die”
Though Bond didn't deliver the "I expect you to die" part, it was a good line overall.
@@OntarioAndrews415 Yeah, I was thinking gee why is it not in this list. But true, since Bond doesn't say it, it doesn't make the cut for this video. But at least you, me, Peter Jones, and the 12 (plus me) that gave Peter's comment a thumbs-up, agree it's a good one.
Diamonds are forever
"Hi my name is Plenty, Plenty O'Tool"
Bond: "Named after your father no doubt"
perhaps
"Hi my name is Plenty"
Bond : But of course
"Plenty O'Toole"
Bond : Named after your father perhaps
It's Pierce Brosnan's 66th birthday. What a coincidence this video came out today
HBD,Man.
Pronto Pierce is my favorite Bond probably cause I was born in the 90s I love Goldeneye ❤️
@@Thatguy55595 I love TND
Well he was born to be James Bond as they say!
Pierce is a Legend, my favourite Bond (with Sean, Roger and George) and absolutely epic in his interpretation, dark to funny with transitions at the speed of light
Man: *dies horrifically*
Bond: It’s about time for a dad joke!
I guess they didn't live to hear it
The line that stays in my mind always is Bond in the shower aboard a sailboat in Skyfall. He says, "I like you better without your Beretta." She comes back with "I feel naked without it." What a great line.
"He had lots of guts!" is the one that always gets me 🤣
Sean Connery is the true reflection of James bond. No other actor has the unique style like him, awesome
"I never miss."
-"You missed Mr. Bond."
-"Did I?"
Moore in Moonraker
Vesper Lynd: You know James, I just want you to know that if all that was left of you was your smile and your little finger, you'd still be more of a man than anyone I've ever met.
James Bond: That's because you know what I can do with my little finger.
That scene was more cringe-worthy than funny.
I was expecting this one to be on here
"No but seriously things are really mangled down there"
"I'm the money"
Bond: "Every penny of it"
alphaess1 Vespa > all other Bond girls
Roger Moore has the best deliveries in my opinion.
"Take a giant step for mankind" *gently pushes guy out the spaceship*
"Thats a nice little nothing ur wearing. I approve" So good
7:47
- Where is Drax?
- He needed some space.
Drax is invisible.
7:47
-He is OUT OF THIS WORLD.
-OUTSIDE.
-He Got Out.
Hey Bond has to workshop thousands of witty zingers a movie, so they can't all be gold
Thanks for editing in the context for these lines lol. I havent watched most of these Bond films yet and it really helps
7:04 is not even really a joke but that's just funny!
"Just a slight stiffness coming on" from Her Majesty's Secret Service is still my favorite.
9:16 Honestly, this one is my favorite _guilty pleasure_ quotes by James Bond.
These Bond one liners are EPIC!
Roger Moore’s, “Did I?” from Moonraker , for me, will remain the most iconic Bond one-liner till kingdom come.
"Hi, I'm Plenty."
"But of course you are."
"Plenty O'Toole."
"Named after your father?"
During the newspaper scene they defo missed out on saying, I’d imagine that’s going to be all over the news tomorrow
He is gonna be in all the papers tomorrow!
Seeing as the fresh copies had the guy's blood all over it, he could have also said, "If it bleeds, it leads."
"I've lost my charm!"
"Not from where I'm standing"
Great line from Diamonds are Forever
Bond to Mr Wint - "That's rather potent, not the wine your aftershave, strong enough to bury anything.
Didn’t he say something about each time he smelt it, he smelt a rat ?
@@symbiat0 - yes he did, referring to the rat he saw in the pipeline while Mr. Wint's "after shave" was all over his suit.
Throws toaster in bathtub
James Bond:shocking
Me: dead
It was a fan, but close enough
@@KenjiAsakura09 - It wasn't a fan, it was an electric heater
2:28 is hands down my favorite one.
living daylights was so underrated
seerpou Dalton was a very underrated Bond as well. It’s just a crying shame that audiences weren’t ready for a gritty and realistic Bond and still wanted the camp theatrics from Moore. His only two movies are also miles better than the last 5 Moore entries.
I agree. Dalton’s Bond was the closest to the books, and he got criticised for the colder Bond....which everyone loves about Craig’s version
5:55 a bit crazy knowing that Oddjob was literally in pain during this scene. Great sport.
Dalton's line about the Aston Martin, "I had a few optional extras installed" is my all time fave 😆
"you know him?"
"Not socially, his name is Jaws he kills people"
XD
"They'll print anything these days" still gets me so bad, even after all these years.
The fact that there are only 3 quips from the Daniel Craig era (all of them from one movie) says something about the direction these movies are going.
They overcompensated for Die Another Day. They need to remember that Bond should be as fun as he is intense. It’s why I love the Connery films. Connery knew how to be cool under pressure
Not really, lazenby and Dalton also had few lines like that.
Lazenby - Dalton - Craig played bond closer to the books while Connery - Moore - Brosnan played closer to cinematic fun bond. Both have their own place, same kind of films can't survive forever.
Without even watching the video, the best Bond line ever was when he emerges from the pipeline being laid in the desert, shoots his cuffs, and says," Pardon me, I was out walking my rat and seem to have lost my way."
First time I ever saw it I had said that line to myself ten seconds before.
For Your Eyes Only, in the confessional. Bond: "Forgive me father, for I have sinned." Q (dressed as priest): "That's putting it mildly 007!"
She always had a good squeeze"
Brings tears to your eyes"
💀💀💀
@4:11 I was hoping he would say: "So that's what's black and white and red all over ..."
Know what they say though 4:16
You forgot the best Timothy Dalton line! “What is this?” “I’ve had a few optional extras installed”
Honestly think the best one from that movie is,
KARA: You were fantastic! We’re free!
BOND: Kara, we’re in a Russian air base in the middle of Afghanistan.
The lack of Timothy Dalton lines was sad to watch, definitely one of the most underrated Bonds
1:45 Back then, I thought he was gonna say, "See yah... On the top..."
Agree
I guess they choose it instead
Shocking positively shocking!! One of my favourite
Same!
Honorable mention:
"The thing's we do for frequent flyer miles."
GoldenEye
from 3:50 and then on this is just mental
"All those feathers and still cant fly" 🙃. "Well she always enjoyed a good squeeze"
'Hang on James!'
"The thought had occurred to me"
I knew there was a reason I loved these movies when I was younger
RIP Thomas Sean Connery. Brilliant actor.
My favourite is "Yes, considerably"
DJCamel Reviews What does that mean exactly??
@@tanishsingh5260 context
"Dont worry the second [kill] is- *gets shot*"
"Yes, considerably"
@@tanishsingh5260 Think he was gonna say the second is easier than the first time lol.
"He always did have an inflated opinion of himself"
That's got to be the best of the lot. Roger Moore had a perfect comic timing.
"He thinks I'm still a virgin."
"...yes, well. You get your clothes on... and I'll buy you an ice cream."
He should say candy 😂😂
@@h3nnkka90 Bond isn't an American, we Brits call candy sweets or sometimes rock, even spice.
trick or threat😎
@@h3nnkka90 Baby smooth delivery.
dafuq?
It really is criminal what Hollywood &as done to such a great character and franchise
Its really telling sth that most of this lines came from Moore and Connery,
"- I trust you can handle this contraption, Q?
- It goes by hot air.
- Oh, then you can."
I’m not at all sad that I have all these memorized from my childhood...
Roger Moore! Possibly the best in terms of one-liners:
“Hang on, James!”
“The thought had occurred to me.”
“I trust you go handle this contraption, Q.”
“It goes by hot air.”
“Oh, then you can.”
“You have a nasty habit of surviving, Mr. Bond.”
“Well, you know what they say about the fittest.”
Phu yuck?
You shot your bolt Stromburg, now it's my turn
All those feathers and he still can't fly
Moore was the man for one liners
Roger Moore & Pierce Brosnan 👌👌
I forgot about Phu Yuck!!
Golden Gun was by far the most underrated Bond movie... Moore, Christopher Lee, and the delectable Britt Ekland.
"You big bully!" "SHUT UP!"
...seconds later...
"Oh James - you didn't!"
"I most certainly did!"
4:02, an epic one liner 🤣🤣🤣🤣
"I think he got the point" is still the most badass from all.
Agreed
I always thought this was the worst one.
My favorite one liner from any Bond film actually comes from the villain in Goldfinger
Bond "Do you expect me to talk?"
Goldfinger "No Mr Bond...... I expect you to die!"
Best one liner ever
It was a real pity Gert Fröbe didn't speak a word English.
I'm guessing Sam Smith was watching Goldeneye when he made his Bond song 5:20
I think one of the best is one from Thunderball, the delivery by Connery makes it perfect:
Domino - I'm glad I killed him
Bond - You're glad
Best one from Thunderball is "I think he got the point".
The guys that write those one liners, and the special effects guys, hey guys you are really talented ! Sean Connery was definitely the best actor to play JAMES BOND !!
After pushing Bond into the crematorium:
Mr. Wint: Very moving
Mr. Kidd: Heartwarming, Mr. Wint
Mr. Wint: A glowing tribute, Mr. Kidd.