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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 3 ก.ค. 2022
- This was my favorite track off Agust Ds mix tape but be warned, the subject matter is dark. This reaction is taken from a live album reaction I did last year. The whole mix tape reaction is now available on Patreon. Join us Next Sunday on Twitch for my reaction to D2.
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![I WAS NOT EXPECTING THAT!! || Suga (AGUST D) - The Last 마지막 [ REACTION!! ]](http://i.ytimg.com/vi/Jt0ZBcYG86I/mqdefault.jpg)
![I WAS NOT EXPECTING THAT!! || Suga (AGUST D) - The Last 마지막 [ REACTION!! ]](/img/tr.png)
This song is how my daughter found BTS. She was depressed, had made 2 suicide attempts, was refusing to eat, covered in scars from self harm, and we were lost. We didn't know how to help. Her Dr insisted on an inpatient place, she was too young for it but they made an exception. And that's where she found AgustD, and from there BTS. Don't get me wrong, there were multiple Drs, dieticians, therapists and other professionals involved in her recovery, but this song was a turning point. He found her and I've never been so grateful for a song. No one else in our family had experienced depression, we didn't understand. Couldn't understand. But he did. And he was open about it. And it helped. I'll likely delete this after a bit, but wanted to share.
You are an amazing mom and your daughter is an amazing girl. I am very very glad that AgustD and BTS found her when she needed them. 💜 Lots of love to you both. 💜
I'm glad he was there for her to find in her time of need. Thank you for sharing your story 💜
God bless you, your family and your precious daughter. My own daughter also struggles my similar issues that haunt her and i used this song and also Blue and Grey to show her that she wasnt alone in her thoughts and that i understood her so it was ok to talk and let it out in the open without the fear of being judged. I feel it helped bring a turning point to her letting me in 💜
I'm glad for your daughter! I too was in a similar position prior...but then his songs gave me the strength to seek help etc
Don’t delete, just like his words reached her, someone else may need to read yours too. Prayers and borahae 💜💜
This isn't even a song to me. Its a testimony. Yoongi blew me away the first time I heard it.
Thank you 🙏🙏🙏🙏
As most ARMY know Suga had suffered for many years with depression, anxiety and compulsion. After his panic attack had cancelled the concert in Kobe, that he was refering to in this song, Suga went back to the venue when it was empty to reflect, he then had a short break , and wrote a long letter for ARMY (translation below) ...
Hello, this is Suga. Many people were curious as to what I was doing on my break, and to simply put it, I walked a lot, slept a lot and thought a lot. I wanted to go on a trip to organize my thoughts before working on my mixtape. I also had a place I must go to. I wanted to do things I was able to do not as a 22-year old BTS’ Suga, but as a 22-year old Min Yoongi. It was a time where I looked back at myself. The things I will say now are things I wanted to share not as a singer to a fan or as BTS to ARMY, but to talk to you as human to human.
I've always wanted to be a cool person to a lot of people. Having rational thoughts and making rational decisions in any situations. I wanted to live like my father. My father said to take a look around you when there's something to be happy about. Be calm and make rational decisions when happy. The first day when "I need u" got 1st place, I took a look at my surroundings. Every minute I'm happy, I acted as if I'm not. When I'm sad I acted as if I'm not. Even if I like it, I acted as if I don't like it. I pretended to be cold-hearted and pretended to be strong. If a joy is shared, it will be doubled but if a sadness is shared, it won't get smaller. That's what I thought. I know I'm a person who's bad at expressing my emotions but I've been living that way and I thought it's right.
One day, I can't exactly remember when, I was in a car with my father and he said "Yoongi, don't live like me". The first day of vacation. The first day ever since I was born, I drank with my family. It has been 6 years since I left home. We were all just chatting, listening to stories that we haven't heard of. The strong and cool father that I know, knows how to feel hurt and sad, how to feel happy and love..
1.5-pyeong in the practice room, my studio is my wide meadows and narrow prison. I can do anything and at the same time, I can't really do anything. I can work on music thoughtlessly for 20 hours, but I can also sit there and not do anything but just thinking for 20 hours. I was 11 years old when I first started writing my own lyrics. When I listen to good music, I will feel really excited and I feel really happy more than anything.
To me, music is my hope and my happiness, I also want to be someone's hope and happiness. Actually I'm someone who would just walk away rather to crash and feel pain. Anyone hates being hurt and I don't want to get hurt. In "Nevermind", "If you feel like you a going to crash then accelerate more". Perharps, that's actually what I wanted to say to myself. The most upsetting time for me when I face a large number of people, is when I face myself who isn’t able to be fair to everyone. I didn’t want to hurt anyone, but there are times I couldn’t do that. I think I’m still a person that lacks in many things.
The second day of the concert in Kobe... I don’t think I’ve ever slept deeply after that day. Could it be because of the fact that I gave a wound to many people? Whenever I fell asleep, I would wake up with cold sweat. Because I already once have not been able to go on stage before and have hurt many people, I said that I’ll go up (to perform) no matter what situation arises. Everyone tried to stop me. I really cried a ton at the situation of not being able to go up on stage. And I know crying is losing. It’s really easy for me to cope with my own sorrow, but witnessing those who love me in sadness is very hard. I made them sad, once again. If I could go back to that day, I would go on stage no matter what. So there was just one place to go.
I went to Kobe during my break. Many people tried to stop me from going, but I didn’t want to be ashamed of myself any longer. So I just went to Kobe without planning. It was my second time visiting the concert venue after a concert. The first was Ax Hall at late night after finishing the first Red Bullet concert. The second time was the Kobe World Memorial Hall, at where I failed to perform. I hate becoming a numb person. I didn’t want to take the love and these glorious days for granted. I didn’t want to be a numb person. That’s why I visited the venues again on my own.
(T/N: He’s saying he doesn’t want to take all the love he’s receiving as granted, he really wants to appreciate every single love he gets. He’s meaning numb in the way by how he wouldn’t be able to feel what the fans feel about him. He’s basically saying he wants to appreciate every love he gets from his fans)
I liked being on stage, and I still do. When I was 15 and performed in front of 2 people I stood proudly and made eye contact with them during my performance. However after my debut I feel that I have not been righteous towards myself. I think it may be because I knew better than anyone that I wasn’t perfect. And then on the day of the first performance of HYYH on stage I made proud eye contact with the audience that I didn’t do in quite a while. But after the second day of the Kobe concert when I was unable to stand on stage, I didn’t have the courage to confidently confront the large number of people. So that’s why I visited Kobe, the concert hall again.
I kept wandering around the area by the concert hall from the time I arrived there until the time our performance was due to begin that day. From the ticketing booth to the entrance and the concert hall - I wanted to feel the same emotions as you all from every nook and corner. I felt many emotions. Happiness, the excited nervousness felt while waiting for the performance, sadness, resentment, anger, regret, etc. I wanted to understand you all, and I do understand. So I’m sorry and apologetic, for I am not a perfect human being. I’m a person who is weak but acts strong.
Once again I realized that I was a person who’s lacking. Although I’m not religious, I prayed at that place. After all, at the end, it was a fated day. Even if it’s ended, let’s not let this heart become numb. To me, who wanted to spend every moment alone, you all were taking up quite a large part (of my mind). Age and gender, nationality and religion, what language you use - all of that isn’t important. "Whether you're young or old, whether you have a hidden child, It doesn't matter", haven't I said this already. That day, we unexpectedly had a Music Bank broadcast and I boarded a plane and returned a day before planned. I returned after organizing my many thoughts.
Once again, while feeling that I’m a blessed person, I felt that I need to be a person who lives every moment feeling thankful. This is the moment I realizied the fact that 22-year old Min Yoongi, who hates being an adult, is standing in front of the threshold to being an adult. Thank you for making me a blessed person, ARMY. Although I’m never able to say this because I’m bad at expressing myself. Here I am conveying my feelings and thoughts once more through a piece of less-than-satisfactory writing. I will live while being thankful of every moment as I am such a lacking human being.
I love you, ARMY.
Wow I have never seen this letter before, I was a 2018 army... this is so honest and heartbreaking, I am so proud of him stepping up
It breaks my heart reading the letter, and see what he's been going through. He is strong but in adifferent way he thought. He looks like a happy person now.
Wow, I never read this before, it reads painfully, omg. He's stronger than he thought. I'm glad he found a way to cope. Love him for continuing to try for himself and us💜
Sad thing is that when yoongi was sick some so called kpop fans/bts fans cyber bullied him for not doing the concert and send pics of broken CDs and torn yoongi pictures photocards and slogans, and even blamed him for not fluent in Japanse is something intentional that he's not loyal to his japanese fans..
Yoongi knows everything , He may seem cold and indifferent person at first but he kept expressing his feelings / love to armies as much as he can..
@@jay-gu1ez yes, that is true....
He became my bias when I read the lyrics to this song. I had been suicidal since the age of 10yrs old I carry my scars of self harm I cried so hard because I could so relate to his pain. Depression and anxiety doesn’t just go away even this day I have to replace those negative thoughts and BTS has been there for me. Epiphany, Magic Shop and Love Myself has helped me so much. I have read the book Into the Magic shop also the Map of the Soul. BTS also helped my granddaughters also. I wrote to RM to thank him. I don’t know if he received it but I had to put it out to the universe.
I heard this and So Far Away on the same day when I knew a total of like 3 BTS songs. I found my bias and became ARMY on the same day. All thanks to Miin Yoongi. Kinda crazy how one guy from a far away country has had such a profound, even life saving affect on millions of us.
Hope you're doing well now! Your story reminded me a bit of myself. I started having suicidal thoughts at around 9-10 yrs old. I visited the doctor for a normal checkup, and they asked abt it on some questionnaire, Idk why I thought they wouldn't tell my mom or make a big deal out of it, so my 14 yr dumbass self said that I did have thoughts and attempted, and they tried to send my ass to therapy, never trusting doctors again they set me up.🤣🤣
This song is one of the most honest songs I’ve ever heard. It’s also my favorite Song by Min Yoongi. I find myself drawn to the songs he has written for BTS..Tomorrow, Let Me Know and Autumn Leafs are the main ones. Having been a fan since debut, thanks to my oldest twin daughter who introduced me to them in 2013, I have been fascinated by Yoongi’s lyrics. He’s just so raw and in your face but tender and comforting also. We were lucky enough to see them live twice before they hit big. Just an amazing group of guys. Also I was in the music industry for 22 years and raised my girls on every genre of music including international. So glad Rowan found BTS it’s been an amazing ride.
This is one of my fave songs of Yoongi/Suga/AgustD and this never fails to make me cry. It just feels so raw and honest. I’m glad he’s in a better state of mind now.
It's a very powerful song, it means so much to so many people. It's not just lyrically powerful, but musically as well. I cannot listen to it often as it brings up too much I'm not ready to deal with, but it cemented Min Yoongi as my ultimate bias. Mad respect for the man.
This song always makes me cry 😢. But I am glad to see how far he as well as all the BTS members have come. Will always be their ARMY no matter what. Thank you for the reaction.
After MORE I cant wait for the solos. Especially Sugas. This song is gut wrenching
This song awaken me from my darkest moment in life. It's like he's saying that he made it through depression so can you. His voice is so emotional, that's what I love about Suga, he really expressing emotions words by words through his voice. That's why I love him, he's not afraid to express himself.
His mix tapes are full of wisdom
I like to call this his self exorcism song bcause thats how it felt for me when i first heard it. You said everything i had in my thoughts...The incredible bravery to write something like this and put it out there for everyone to see, even more so in a cultural society that shuns the topic entirely as one you dont ever talk about... the power in that cannot be underestimated. He literally tore himself wide open 💜
Songs like this is what separates these men from almost all other musical artists. So open, honest and real.
@@timothywest1183 Absolutely agree 💜
Suga is the first member I noticed. He raps with his heart, raw and real.
I am so glad I found BTS, they help me a lot to keep me alive
This is the Queen of visceral cathartic experience in song writing - Suga and AgustD is the king of that category.
I do not know any other artist/ singer/ and least of all rapper who would make me cry and feel as much as Min Suga does :-)
Suga has said that Agust D is NOT an alter ego (like Slim Shady was/is for Eminem), but just another side to him. I recommend checking out a few different translations. Not that this one is bad or incorrect, but it's an interpretation and I always find it useful to read a few different translations to get a better understanding. It can be a disservice to take any one translation as 100% accurate when trying to interpret what he meant by his "words".
Join us Sunday on Twitch for the D2 Reaction www.twitch.tv/jimgameslive
I always cry whenever I hear this song.... because it's hard for me to imagine Yoongi went through all that. 😭😭
Yoongi was asked about this song a few years ago. He said at first he did not like the song, but now he likes it. When asked why he wrote this song, his answer: I was trying to live.
Wow
I didn't know I missed this reaction so thank you for uploading to TH-cam! Excited for this coming Sunday too 😄
Yoongi always hits us with truth and authenticity. He writes testimonies!
The BEEP part references the doctor if suga ever self harm/ tried to die
This song hits so hard and makes me cry every time I hear it...forever grateful to Yoongi for sharing it, such a strong and special man ❤️
Oh yes he is very very special my baby boy ❤️❤️❤️
cant wait for your d2 reaction, it's my favourite mixtape ever!
This was a rough time for every BTS member. Now the things are different. Now Suga even said that dancing is fun and he his trying to improve himself with activities beyond music and performance. They are in a new life stage. 💜
this song touched me so much. the lyrics are deep, showing yoongi's feelings well. shiver I always hear
Another really great reaction Jim. Thank you for giving this song the attention it deserves. I would agree with a lot of the comments that this song is one of the major reasons Suga became my bias. The first time I heard it I didn't have the subtitles on and I just closed my eyes and felt it. The emotion and desperation that turns to determination and strength and confidence and at the same time still holds frustration was enough to make it one of my favourite tracks he has ever released. Raw and beautiful. What took it up a level was then reading and understanding the lyrics and knowing how many people it was going to show they were not the only ones that had gone through that darkness and that one day that darkness could turn to memories for them too. Suga's ability to learn about his shadow and embrace it to make himself the person he is today is so admirable. He deserves to be where he is for that alone. Add the buckets of talent a warm heart for the people he loves and the passion he has for his work and you truly have an example of a beautiful human. Again, thank you for treating the song with such sincerity as always. 😊👍🏻
So well said, Kendall. It’s obvious that you are also a beautiful human .
Yes
I had severe depression for many years about over 15 years before finding bts. i would get better and cycle back down again get better and cycle back down again for those 15 years. i was really at my worst when i came across the boys. Upon meeting bts I had broken up with a boyfriend, my mom was sick, depression was heavy my anxiety was bad. I thought i was literally crazy in my mind. I stopped going to college and only got out of bed to work at my job. Bts music, speeches. songs, shows became as a positive distraction and motivation. Songs like this made me feel less unnormal. It's been about 7 years since I became an army and i have been on the upside of depression and anxiety. I think it is important for artist to talk about stuff like this. They can influence and motivate many people in ways that others cannot.
Finally 🔥 Thank you Jim.
When I first heard this song it literally left me completely speechless I couldn’t imagine being so open,real and totally raw. You can hear the emotions in his voice throughout this song. It takes courage to be this honest.
I always get chills when listening to Suga/AgustD. He is unafraid to show his struggles to the world 💜
I have been depressed for many years now and there has been times I was at my absolutely worst. It was really scary especially looking back. My mind was really scary. I am now just getting better, getting help and start to see world more clearly. I found BTS when I was my latest low point and many of their songs really gave me strength. This song is one of them and is really dear to me. I am not even sure why. Maybe because someone I look up can relate to me or because he is not afraid to talk about those things. Probably because many reasons. Really their music was there comforting me and I am now holding them close to my heart 💜
Can't wait for the D2 reaction sksjdkdmd
yoongi sharing his testimony and stories is so vulnerable and open of him. this felt like bottled up emotions, i am glad he found his outlet to let this pour out so he doesn’t hold onto it on his own.
this song always gives me chills and goosebumps 👏🏻
This the song that made Suga my bias. I can relate so much to his personality and his struggles. I'm also the type that has trouble showing emotion like Yoongi.
After I heard this song, he became my bias instantly. His raw lyrics and emotions really shows in his songs especially this one. This song also gave me hope, since I'm suffering from socialphobia. He's an amazing person, my all time inspiration and the one I look up to. Thank you for giving it a listen
Really to be appreciate for your honesty courage respect showing your painful struggles opening your heart turning your self wow you’re amazing Suga beautiful soul simply showing your sincerity stay strong you’re life is precious more anything else for you and your beautiful family friend avenirs pure soul keep shining stays honest 🌸☘️🌸☘️🌸☘️🌸🙏🙏thank you for sharing 🙏😊🙏
My daughter suffered from terrible anxiety, she would pull out her hair and be consumed with fear. She found BTS and the rapline and in a few months' time, she was a completely different person. Her perception of the world changed, and her anxiety lifted. It's been 3 years now, and she is a confident young woman who loves herself and has tremendous compassion for others
Suga was fighting with himself. That's what depression is. It's a whole war inside your mind i.e your body.
This song helped so, so much... it means so much to me and i would not be here if it were not for bts and my fiance, they came into my life at the perfect times
I think Suga said somewhere that he has OCD. Same as my daughter, this song means a lot to me. It describes how OCD works on a person's mind until we don't recognized them😢. My daughter felt on a wheel spinning, a tunel were you can't get out until you get the medicine that works right in your brain😢
I’m just gonna remind you this is from a few years ago. Altho mental health is cyclical for the most part I think. I also think it’s good remind it isn’t static. He puts music about things he already dealt with. So the AgustD and Yoongi from that time isn’t him anymore. That was a snipped in time of who he is. As part of his journey. But altho this is a part of him it does not mean he is still that same person
I love everyone of them this song means as someone who has attempted suicide twice and has extreme social anxiety. I sometimes have no one to talk and learned to alway keep everything to myself. Still don't have the courage to get help but I do have music
💜
They're great story tellers, not only bc of their lyrics, you can feel every word they're saying and The Last is a perfect example, you don't need to read the lyrics to feel the pain in his voice...
ahh.. i always skip this song cause I don't wanna cry 😔
Max Bparskih - Don't fp*]ck with Ukraine
Yarmak - дике поле
Reaction pleased
Now. Do. "Daechwita". Please.
He is going to react to D-2 this Sunday at 3:30 PM EST on Twitch :)
pls reaction to billlie flipping a coin by billlie 🙌🏻💋
In the stream chat kabazinga was so annoying. This song literally implies that he has attempted or thought about it. It seems quite obvious and in Korea they are shamed for talking about suicide like it is some kind of taboo subject. He couldn't say the words outright. Seriously they are trying to prove everybody wrong. It is obnoxious.