Moving On! Breaking Free Physically, Emotionally & Energetically from Emotional Abuse
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 16 ก.ย. 2024
- www.drdenisedar...
One of the the most painful aspects of an emotionally abusive relationship is that it robs you of your sense of self. I hear from thousands of women all over the world who describe the sense of feeling stuck; of not knowing whether to stay or go or how even to begin to make that happen. It isn't easy but I want you to know clearly that you have the power to choose what you want and don't want in your life. As long as you are listening to his stream of toxicity interspersed with what appear to be sincere efforts to get you back you abusers voice will drown own your ability to hear your own interval voice or to access your intuitive wisdom. You can break free. Keep coming back and we'll continue to talk about how to begin and keep going. I'm not sure the source, but I love the quote, "Everything you desire in your life is on the other side of fear."
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Please watch and tune in every Friday for the next installment of the Ask Dr. Denise Series: "When Will I Learn to Trust Again Narcissistic Abuse?"
• When Will I Learn to T...
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I couldn't believe some of the nastiest, hurtful things he would say, and then come back!! It was a horrible pattern that I thought I was the only one going thru. My first painful experience of this. I began looking online for emotional abuse and discovered narcissism. Never knew a thing about it!! I feel stronger since I left and I'm not looking back now. Slowly getting myself back!!
Feels so good to know I'm not alone with those experiences. Thought at times I might be crazy and if I could only become the person he expected me to be we could be happy. Now I've understood the Wohle mechanisms. Still struggling to break free. Thank you so much for all your videos.
Dear Dr Dennis . Thank you for all the helpful information.
I'm 56 years old and my boyfriend of 19 years is 63. He never wanted to get married, he bought a house by himself with out me while we were living together,and made me pay have of all the bills.
I finally bought a small condo on my own
And we've been living separate for the last 7 years. He does everything for me and I'v became very codependent of him. He's always been very controlling and manipulate. Many times I felt diminished by his comments but I'd learned to take the good with the bad.
Well, a few days ago I got very furious about a conversation we were having and I said things that I can't take back. I think is over now and I'm suffering.
Is very confusing for me because sometimes I think that is my fault. I keep watching your videos,and I'm also going for counseling. Thanks so much.
Thank you for taking the time to leave a comment and share feedback. I know how much this hurts. My heart goes out to you 💜
He shut me out for three years and now it's time for me to let go. We're in different states. I love him but he's no good for me at all.
Ps, George Addair made the quote and its one of my favorites. Also.. "At the end of the debate slander is the tool of the defeated" -Socrates
One of the best videos on this subject I've seen. So practical and comforting - I keep coming back to it to generate more healing. Thankyou.
you are helping soooooooo much thank you doctor Dart
I’m so glad 💜 You are welcome!
Thank you Thank you Thank you Dr Dart. I was holding in my emotions with food. I now know to feel. When your brain is so traumatized you only are able to understand solutions when they are explained in such a simple way, as you explained to feel the emotions and don't hold them in, Thankyou Tania and God Bless you xx
God bless you too Tania 💜
I'm glad you are back. Thank you for this.
20 years! I threw away 20 freaking years on a man who I trusted and thought would NVR betray me---and he did! Worse and more thoroughly than I could ever have imagined he'd be capable of in my worst nightmares! 20 years!! -well, it would be 19 yrs in April---April fools day to be exact. When I was planning our wedding I gave my husband a choice of two dates to pick from to schedule it on-neither one being better or worse than the other to me...but, he worked Saturdays at the time And had to request off well in advance--so, I wanted to make sure there were no scheduling conflicts on his part---typical of me to ALWAYS be thinking and worrying about his happiness and convenience while I was like "whatever! Doesn't matter to me! As long as you're happy, honey!".
He chose April 1st. He thought it was hilarious...I thought it amusing as well. Having our anniversary on that day was quirky and a cute conversation piece when it came up! Other people got a kick out of it----and no one that knew it was our anniversary ever forgot---so, it was just a nod to our silliness and our shared sense of humor as a couple for most of my married life!
Now!?!----now sometimes it seems like a cruel joke----on me...a cruel joke and no one who knows about it will ever forget it😦😐😶. I still try to have a sense of humor about it---but, there have been times where i truly believe that it was a neon sign from the Universe and the universe did not intend it as humorous at all! Obviously, the universe doesn't have a firm grasp on the concept of human humor or it would be a lot more clear when sending out it's messages not to inadvertently do it in a way that could be misunderstood and just seem like a minor twist of fate and not regarded as a cosmic warning by its intended recipient! I guess that's where the concept of irony comes from!😳
My first husband was emotionally abusive and neglectful . After over 20 years of marriage is left. Single for 13 years. Then I fell for a worse narcissistic abuser. 2 years of marriage and I am divorcing him. I need to find out why I keep doing this.
I am divorcing him. It is worse and so very hard
Kathy, I can absolutely help you with this 1:1 Coaching can help you gain clarity and heal the internal wounds so that you no longer attract or are attracted to this type of person.
You are AMAZING! Thank you so much❤❤❤
Everything you are telling as is so helpfull and so nourishing.I love you Dr. Denise!
Absolutely! Feel it to Heal it! Amen!
great video.
I stopped owning other's words. through flippantly saying almost nothing back. For example: If it works for you. Or if you ca live without it, I can live with it. And walk out chuckling.
Your videos have helped me let go& end things within a few hours. So eye opening, but it is very hard right now. & he blames me & goes off on me for not replying telling me I've given up on him.
He will be arrested. He had his hands on my throat. Threatened to knock my teeth out. I am done
I like you so much. Thank you. And im literally in the driver's seat in my driveway 😂
Thank you..u r a God-Sent...bless u
This is so awesome! I needed this ❤
Spot on! Thank you.
😢 thank you so much
I want no love and no relationship :(. I want no contact! I want to be left alone. AARRRGH!
It’s so hard to leave your abuser so don’t wait until you have nobody left to help you .. go now.
Leann, this is such good advice. I can't tell you how many people tell me about the years, sometimes decades, they sacrificed under the spell of a narcissistic abuser. The abuser's bag of tricks is filled with tactics that can literally suck the life out of you. The longer you stay and are subjected to empty promises, gaslighting, projection, minimizing, hoovering, name calling, demeaning etc. the harder it is to find the strength to leave. Thank you for taking the time to share your wisdom with others. 💜
Love this! Thank you Dr.!
Krystal, our personality is not yet formed at 16. She is likely in the throws of adolescence and confused, angry...probably a lot going on there. If she were my daughter I'd do everything humanly possible to get her into therapy. If that's not possible because of your ex, it's probably a good idea that you have a therapist to explore the options and how to best process all this. 💜I can only imagine how painful it must be.
Thank you, I will do my best to get us both in therapy.
I am just moving on from an abusive nephew....I am 50 ,cared for both parents for 32 years,and he made our lives miserable without even living with us.... didn't know he had gone to a cousin and smeared campaign me for years....my dad died,I moved,when my dad died I went no contact with my nephew,he has been ruthlessly stalking me for two years,I saught a restraining order and his flying monkeys came out of the woodwork,however,his flying monkeys have caught him ,they are scratching their heads now when even they see he is always driving by my home flipping me off,or walking by my office shouting obscenities at me when I'm outside....my nephew didn't know his monkeys were there,now they are trying to tell me all he has said,I told them I don't want to know! No contact is both ways,I don't want him knowing about me not I him.....forgiveness is my response to all of this,yes, yesterday is gone,today is beautiful....I wish my nephew well,I feel sorry for him,but I am responsible only for my behavior,not his.....God bless and thankyou for your wonderful videos!😀
Forgiveness releases you from an energetic connection with him. You're absolutely right we are only responsible for ourselves...and that is very empowering!
This is one of the best l have listened in on. Right now there has been little to no CONTACT for about 8 months now. We have 3 grown up children and grandchildren. We are divorced and all of the things you mentioned in the video he said to me. He left me in financial disaster and l am not on meds any more but at times l feel l need them. It's been almost 4 yrs since our divorce and I'm sure there is another supply. He's keeping hidden for now. The pain of giving 33yrs of my life to this sick person just makes me want to hurt him. I know l must forgive myself for not knowing. I was so young back then. The grandchildren don't understand why he's so mean when it comes to me. I listened to your words in tears. I'm dealing with this the best l know how. I have new friends and a support system. I hate being alone..... l just want the pain to stop so l can move on!!!! Blessings to you!
Im looking forward for that video about children involved
How do you do this when it's your 16 yr old daughter? She is now living with her father, who is my ex narc, and she is totally against me and is showing all the signs of being narrissict too. She cut out her brother as well. I'm no contact with her but, it's killing me. I love her and want to have a good relationship with her, which seems impossible right now. How do I handle this without making things worse? I'm damned if I do, and damned if I don't. I just don't know what to do. Thank you, Krystal
KRYSTAL ROUSH pray for her. The prayers of the mother are powerful. Don't give up on her.
Hi I love what you say in your video... I can't go no contact because I need evidence for a restraining order. I don't reply.
If you could help me with why I don't want to press charges on my ex I would really appreciate it. I don't want him to go to prison... I just want it to be over xx thank you xx
There are many reasons Becca. One that may fit is Stockholm syndrome. If he has hurt you to the extent that he would go to prison for it, you may be in more danger than you realize. If there have been ANY threats in communication, you probably have what you need already to get a restraining order. Looking at or listening to abusive communication is subjecting yourself to his abuse.
What a beautiful bare face! And your videos are helping us.
I'm glad my videos are helpful. :-)
J Romeo She's naturally beautiful.
U r BEAUTIFUL
can everyone pray for me
After watching amd reading your feeds I am horrified on how this seems to destroy some good men (I am included here) that have some issues but lose their entire family due to your advise.
I truly love my wife but am guilty of lack of love and affection seen from my own parents and family. Based on your advise I shall never be able to conquer this and keep my family.
Your advise sounds like watching a political parties opinion of the other party.
My wife probably watching your videos amd basing her actions up on them, leaving me.
Can u help me??? I want to change and be a part of my family but your advise promotes separation.
Gary, I appreciate your comment and I assure you I do not advise anyone to stay or leave their relationship. My channel is designed primarily for a female audience and I use pronouns that reflect that....this form of emotional abuse is not gender specific. I do not believe that one gender or the other is the problem. The information I provide can be helpful is looking for abusive patterns that repeat over and over and are often so entrenched they are unlikely to change. I believe in marriage and in committed relationships and yet no one should be forced to live in a relationship that demeans or belittles them. If you believe you are losing your marriage and do not want that to happen it would be a good idea to work with a local therapist who specializes in emotionally hurtful relationships (if that fits). The only way we can change anything is to look inward and change what needs to be changed. I wish you all the best.