The Book the seven core issues of adoption and permanency helped me so much understand what was going on internally with me, thank you for speaking on this.
I have a very similar experience with having been adopted by my stepfather. I definitely had many of the issues you described. I never felt like I belonged. Even today, I don’t really fit into the adoptee community either.
While in rehab for addiction, my counselor dismissed the possibility of Trauma from being adopted. I don't believe her one bit.It's deep and unlike a traumatic event that happens at a young age, where there is no point prior to it to reference/go back to in effort to start healing.
I'm sorry to hear that you felt dismissed. Adoption can indeed be a source of deep emotional pain and trauma. It's important to have a therapist who validates your experiences. Consider finding someone who specializes in adoption-related trauma for better support in your healing journey.
@@ScottT-g5mYes, they are all very booked-up, and they don’t take insurance and charge a lot of money. I had to stop working with mine when our finances changed. But she charged $200/50 minutes, and didn’t give you a paid receipt weekly, but monthly. (A “superbill”.) This meant I had to have $800 upfront to pay her before I could even submit for out-of-network reimbursement to my insurance company. And then there were more weeks of therapy before the check came to me from the insurance company. Only way I even got in to see her was that I essentially wasn’t working at the time, and begged her to let me take her cancellations. She was happy to do this and we found time nearly every week to work together. I was on her waiting list for 6 months without any progress before it came to me to suggest this solution. I can’t afford her anymore, but I think every adoptee should have appropriate therapy from an appropriate therapist and PAID FOR by their adoptive parents!
💥Adoption trauma is no joke‼️There is a humongous void that ought to be addressed by both parties. Being denied closure on the truth does more harm than good. Being told things like: "We didn't tell you because we love you" only brings up more anger to be honest. 💢 It's even worse when the adopted parent roles completely leave the biological parents completely out the picture, and insert themselves to take their place. It makes it worse because the adopted child is naturally going to put two and two together, but being gaslit and silenced even when the evidence is laid in the table is abuse‼️
The Book the seven core issues of adoption and permanency helped me so much understand what was going on internally with me, thank you for speaking on this.
I have a very similar experience with having been adopted by my stepfather. I definitely had many of the issues you described. I never felt like I belonged. Even today, I don’t really fit into the adoptee community either.
Thank you for shedding light on this.
Thank you
While in rehab for addiction, my counselor dismissed the possibility of Trauma from being adopted. I don't believe her one bit.It's deep and unlike a traumatic event that happens at a young age, where there is no point prior to it to reference/go back to in effort to start healing.
I'm sorry to hear that you felt dismissed. Adoption can indeed be a source of deep emotional pain and trauma. It's important to have a therapist who validates your experiences. Consider finding someone who specializes in adoption-related trauma for better support in your healing journey.
@@themindfulspace I found one in my area, but apparently this psychologist is booked up for years. Might have to consider the online route
@@ScottT-g5mYes, they are all very booked-up, and they don’t take insurance and charge a lot of money. I had to stop working with mine when our finances changed. But she charged $200/50 minutes, and didn’t give you a paid receipt weekly, but monthly. (A “superbill”.) This meant I had to have $800 upfront to pay her before I could even submit for out-of-network reimbursement to my insurance company. And then there were more weeks of therapy before the check came to me from the insurance company.
Only way I even got in to see her was that I essentially wasn’t working at the time, and begged her to let me take her cancellations. She was happy to do this and we found time nearly every week to work together. I was on her waiting list for 6 months without any progress before it came to me to suggest this solution.
I can’t afford her anymore, but I think every adoptee should have appropriate therapy from an appropriate therapist and PAID FOR by their adoptive parents!
💥Adoption trauma is no joke‼️There is a humongous void that ought to be addressed by both parties. Being denied closure on the truth does more harm than good. Being told things like: "We didn't tell you because we love you" only brings up more anger to be honest.
💢 It's even worse when the adopted parent roles completely leave the biological parents completely out the picture, and insert themselves to take their place. It makes it worse because the adopted child is naturally going to put two and two together, but being gaslit and silenced even when the evidence is laid in the table is abuse‼️