Your co-workers are NOT your friends.
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 7 ก.พ. 2023
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@grimey83
Never tell people (especially coworkers):
1: Your intentions
2: Your personal goals
3: Your charitable deeds
4: Your training and practice
5: Your family affairs
6: Your wealth and possessions
7: Your spiritual experiences
And especially not your problems, 90% of people don't care and 10% are glad you have them.
This is a damn powerful comment. All who read, take heed.
Agreed I had a car accident in on my way to school this year in January caused by an idiot who totaled my car. As I was there, 2 hours away from my family I realized no one cares about you. Cars zoomed past, not giving a shit. Why would they? Its just another another accident on the road for everyone else right? When my family drove all the way to pick me up, That’s when I realized yeah, only few people in your life will actually care about you… the rest are irrelevant. Quote from the joker: (2019)
“If it was me dying on the street, you’d walk right over me.”
@@dannyhernandez265
I get where you're coming from but I've seen proof of this not being true!
@@Fighting_Fatigue_117 hmm. Maybe in rare cases. For the most part though, the world is a void of despair, where you are truly alone out here.
The other percent will hold you to it and bring it up to put you down !!!
my coworkers try to gossip to me and i want no part of that- if they'll say it TO you, they'll say it ABOUT you. no desire to be a part of that!
100% true. my coworkers are always so kind to me, but are constantly talking shit about whoever isn't there at the moment. I don't believe I'm an exception.
@@drualipa3607 💯🙌🏾🙌🏾
Perfectly stated!!! 💯
Right I don't get paid for that it doesn't affect my pay I don't care about it
So true!!!
this is why people fight for remote work because this removes all these workplace violence that goes on.
The hostile work environment
Yes. I prefer working remote.
i would love to work remote again
I made mistake by telling my coworker about my personal life….I Learned the hard way,NEVER AGAIN!!!
Same!!! Lesson learned long ago! 💯
Yep me too
Omg, I stupidly dated one for a couple months and now have to see him every day. The regret hits hard 😢
What did you tell them?
@@menumlor9432 That I was secretly a ... wait a minute nevermind
General rule of thumb is to talk to a coworkers as if your boss is listening. Because most of the time he really does.
FACTS!!!!!!! 💯💯💯
@@BigMike_RTTV I'm from Canada. What is your advice? Same here being bullied, mobbed, gaslighting, harassed at the hospital for over 12 years. I've happened to be the top worker for 38 years and have never been suspended. These bullies are jealous and miserable people. Union, manager, HR and the police are all totally useless. Bullies are lazy bums and stupid managers are scared of the bullies. They say about me I'm crazy, I drink, I'm a stalker all bs defamation of character. The biggest mistake since they removed disciplinary measures. They should arrest the bullies and fire the manager. Action speaks louder than nasty words. It destroyed my reputation. I will never quit to make these lazy bums ever win. If I decide to transfer to another hospital and may start mobbing me once again, I don't know all the new managers etc. like in every department like now. So best to not change hospitals. I will never let bullies try to control me from quitting. Never let these low life lazy bums ever win.[
@@AnthonyManziothat is the 99% sadly
My boss was a retard
My coworkers are all LGBTQ. One of them pinned me down and called me gay. They tried to penitrate me, but luckly I had a bad accident when I was young and had to get metal plates inserted into my bum. So I deflected the coworkers thrusts with my metal plated butt cheeks.
Once they knew I was half man half metal, they all went as limp as a new born baby.
Your work mates really are not your real mates. Really mates don't r*p*. REAL MATES DON'T R*P*!!!
2 things I learned in companies: Coworkers are not your friends, and HR is your enemy. HR is basically there to protect the company FROM you.
Yep I learned that the hard way. I don't say anything anymore I'm mute now
Well no one is going to give the game to over throw them especially if your just there to be used.
HR in corporate is a double edged sword. On one hand I've seen and heard from leaders who use them in straight up dirty ways. On the other hand I've also heard of HR giving these same leaders hell if they don't get the right man handling their business.
@@shamfyre modern day slavery
@techwin1048 nah, corporate is just its own game. I'm not in that line of work anymore and I think thats best for my mental health, but I still had a good time overall. Best advice I can give is not to dive head first into politics though. You probably can't stay away from them entirely, but try to stay out of the mix when you can.
They will pretend to be curious about you but more often than not, they are actually being nosey and fishing for ammo to use against you. This is a great video and so true.
@jonvon2044 "more often than not, they are actually being nosey and fishing for ammo to use against you"
You hit the nail right on the head. I've said the exact same thing to my spouse, but she thinks that I just see the worst in people.
What about the idiots who are looking for their next boyfriend/girlfriend at the workplace? I have a dude that has a crush on me at work. He's always nervous around me and dropping stuff on the floor. He never talks to me. But he turns bright red when he sees me. People can't help who they fall in love with. But it's getting distracting. Now HE makes me nervous. I don't know what to do. I'm just here to collect a paycheck.
@@LaoSoftwareLet him hit it one time. 🫠
@@LaoSoftware shouldn’t effect you at all if he’s not speaking to you. Tf LOL
There’s quote from Goodfellas - “See, your m*rders come with smiles, they come as your friends, the people who've cared for you all of your life. And they always seem to come at a time that you're at your weakest and most in need of their help.” A lot of people act curious about you but they are looking for ammo as you said.
They are so called friends don't go out with them, no relationship, don't visit them to there home, don't invite them to your home, don't introduce them to your loves one, don't accept anything from them don't give them anything. Just go to work and do your job. Eat alone on your lunch break. Ignore the gossip.
Amen
Exactly
I follow this but I’m labeled “weird”😂😂
sure but at the end of the day when you die the majority of people who come to your wake will probably be your coworkers.
Yep
One of the biggest reasons I PREFER to work by my damn self. Does it get lonely, yes, however some of the best conversations with God and self-reflection I've had since working alone.
Now that’s real!!! Which is why I’m definitely working for myself after the military. I can’t do it anymore.
@BigMike_RTTV Respect, brother, thank you for your service/wisdom from one veteran to another.
God be with you brother! Thank you! 🙏🏿💯
facts bro same here
Exactly! Its always a hating azz byyootch being fake at work...😡
Beware when you hear "we're like a big family here ", all that means is people will want to be in your business. When they see your not into gossip they'll be looking to fire you saying you "Don't fit in".
I just don’t see the point in playing the game or working a job/career if you were never on the team to begin with and alot of negativity within it that right there is a red flag.
@@techwin1048
Boy we need that damn check that's why we keep up with their bullshit
@@anti-narc1343 Nah rs it’s too bad we ain’t never getting out fr because folks at the bottom are the majority and could’ve dipped but they support the people who are pimpin them.(kissing ass isn’t gonna help u over throw or get in good with someone who’s intentions are to fuck u over).
@@anti-narc1343 The term you're looking for, is 'wage slave'. You are a wage slave.
Learned that 😂😂
What I’ve learned from work:
Once and a while some new employee appears and outshines the people who have been around longer.
If you bust your ass off and go above and beyond what is asked of you, it makes others feel insecure. That’s their own problem, not yours. Don’t kill your ambition just because they never had any.
There are people who naturally stand out and unintentionally intimidate their superiors. The superior(s)will try everything in their power to appear to be in control.
The average worker constantly switches sides depending on who they perceive to be the strongest. They are followers and can be manipulated by you or others.
When you do something right, you will never get recognized for it. However the moment you make one mistake, you will never hear the end of it.
That’s all true, but that last point you made I feel every day 😢
Just got laid off cuz of this
This is why I don’t talk to anyone at work. I just be by myself. Anyone gossip I just give them a “mhm” or a “oh ok that’s cool” cause people at work place want to know your business and it’s up to you to just keep quiet.
But when you do your job well they don't really appreciate it or care they like people that kiss ass anyway
The last point is how it should be I believe. it may not seem fair but doing a good job is to be expected much more than mistakes. And mistakes must be minimized at whatever cost which is why errors are acknowledged more.
Be friends with coworkers at your own risk. Be aware that at any time one of them could stab you in the back.
The biggest red flag is when co workers push themselves on you so tough to be your friend. I always keep to myself and they hate it.
Yeah people hate what they can’t figure out.
smart option
I can definitely relate to this. I'm very introverted and when I came across loud mouths they got really annoyed real quick.
Me to Warzone you like a life depends on it or some like it's not call self-esteem
Its always a female.....
Be careful who you trust because not everyone who smiles at you is not your friend
Big Facts!!! 💯
@@BigMike_RTTV That's why I keep my grandma at a distantness -she be smiling when she speep me and says she loves me but I can tell dat trick be LYING!!!
@@beno8082 😂😂
Well damn 😂😂😂😂😂😂
Yup. Let's not forget how the Bible mentions wolves in sheeps clothing...
Never get personal with a coworker. Ever! A good morning with a smile and a good evening with a smile is all you need to give them. Just stay focused on your work and avoid personal conversations at all times. I couldn't agree more. Great content. Folks need to know this. 👍
He did not say that at all. This is not a good attitude. You don't have to be friends with them but personal conversations are necessary to keep work going.
@@deamateurjurist Not really because they can be used against u. No one is obligated to be personal or divulge personal info with co-workers.
@@deamateurjuristlol what a dumbass comment
This is so true! I was a young adult when I learned coworkers aren’t my friends. In fact, a couple mature women several decades older than me told me this from the start of my working career. I have worked with many difficult coworkers that lied on me, talked trash behind my back etc., etc. I just can’t stand how nosy everyone is and I don’t want to trust just everyone. People are so fake.
In Vietnam, we have co-workers as friends and often hang out after work like going to a restaurant or a game arcade.
Here in America, co-workers view you as a threat. No wonder America's work culture is so depressing.
Big facts…. And bro your username is taking me out 😂😂😂
@olympicassester
You’re absolutely right!!! This only happens in the US, back where I worked we hanged out and met and it was all cool, here is totally different.
I'm from the US, we hang out and go out together ALL the time here. But... they will ALSO talk behind your back and try to get you in trouble. So it's at a risk. EVERYTHING you say CAN and WILL be used against you.
@@anactaneustheeleventh2542
It happens in the UK as well.
I think it’s a western problem.
Your username is crazy 😂
I'm everyone's friend at work, but i'm also nobody's friend. The only thing that matters to me is to getting my work done very well.
This is facts
People hate when you do your work well. You aren’t everyone’s friend you’re everyone’s enemy.
@@CC-pu6qnyou have no enemies . Nobody in this world, has enemies .
Well said
Same here get along with all shifts but they wonder why I don’t never hang out with them drinking …came here on a mission
A lot of the time your friends are not your friends. Let alone co-workers.
I had a horrific supervisor who loved to gossip about everyone. It was VERY demoralizing. I finally had to quit because I couldn't take the stress of dealing with that and her harassment of me in general. HR would never do anything. I'm now at a much better workplace but my salary and benefits are greatly reduced but my health was being affected in a VERY negative way in the old job. I agree with your advice. Don't EVER give people bullets to use against you. Don't get involved in the office gossip and be EXTREMELY careful of who you trust!!! Be very neutral at work.
Your supervisor is toxic. It is best that you transfer out of that department and work with good people.
@@LaoSoftware I left the company about 3 and a half years ago. The entire place was toxic. I worked there for 24 years. I couldn't take it anymore. I now work in a place with a fabulous atmosphere. 😃It's like night and day. The pay and the benefits aren't as good but I swear I was going to die an early death if I stayed at my previous place. I knew about 10 people that died in their 50s and early 60s due to the stress of that hellhole. Did you hear of Glassdoor? It's a website in which employees can evaluate their employer. Everyone trashed my previous workplace in the comments! I still will never trust anyone at work completely no matter where I work. I swear I have PTSD.
From my experiences, some are so eager to stir the pot, that if you remain private, they’ll make shit up lol
Oh my goodness I’ve seen that one too many times. Some people just have no life and it’s really sad.
its happening to me now but its everyone even my boss
@@thecringeistoostrong My manager was definitely included
Its better they make stuff up and fail rather than use specific vulnerabilities (from what we showed them) to target us more effectively. I find that without enough info they just fail most of the time if they have to "shoot in the dark" or it backfires.
Loll😅😅😅
I’ve noticed that coworkers will form an alliance amongst each other and go against or make life a little harder for the guy that’s the most productive at work. Thankfully all productivity is logged in the system and the stats speak for themselves. Generally people will ignore someone with some level of incompetence or a layman (that’s where they form their alliance) but when they see your level of expertise and that you are not a group follower, they will want to bring you down, solely out of spite for you.
YOOO THIS IS FACTS AND TRUTH!!!! Perfectly said!!! 👏🏿👏🏿👏🏿💯
The story of my life. I went into business for myself because of this abuse.
This!
This is a hidden truth facts 🔥💯
Oh my God, the story of my life 😱(I live in Europe, it’s the same problem everywhere)
So true.... I try to tell brand new employees exactly what you're saying. And sadly, they ignore me and eventually figure it out for themselves! I just retired after 27 years on the job. I've not received one call or text from any of my co-workers or Supervisors who I was cool with. It was like I never existed.
Just started a new job. I plan on small talk and jokes having nothing to do with my personal life. And very superficial work only relationships 😊.
Congratulations on your retirement! Forget those people, and focus on a healthy and happy retirement. Be blessed ❤
I said this almost 20 years ago during my time in the military. If you are sharp and doing everything you can to progress your career, you’ve put a bright red bullseye on your back.
🎯🎯🎯… FACTS!!!
That's awful, sorry the military has such a bad wrap, but then I think of the cover up so it's a good allegory for friendly fire. But yeah it helps to know when to leave as the turnover rate increases (especially when it was a friend at work but sometimes they don't talk outside the job) or you are given lateral promotions to do more for the same pay.
I'll never understand how the nasty ones get ahead then?
@@Anywhooo While they pretend to be your, “friend,” they’ll be trying to gather information. They’ll go and tell so & so what you said about them, they’ll spread that you thought something was stupid or bs, they’ll try to convince people that you’re nothing but, “arrogant” & think too highly of yourself and all the while, they’ll smile and act like your buddy.
Since they’re not as good as you, that’s all they have to try to get ahead. I made E6 at 24 years old. (I enlisted at 17) Imagine how well that went over with people that were E5s and in their 30s. If you have the opportunity for E7 before or by 30, don’t trust anyone. Your own troops will respect the hell out of you and will be highly motivated, but any other E7s and above will not like it. Not just for the fact that that they feel threatened, but because of the fact that they believe you, “didn’t put in your time” like they did. For the most part, those individuals will be coming to the end of their career.
I can only imagine what it’s like today.
@@Anywhooo Nasty ones always seem to be in a clique and you’ll notice that a key individual in that group is always a higher ranking individual.
Before I started my actual career, I was working at a gym fresh out of college. I remember selling a membership to this guy named Dwight, who was a traveling businessman with years of experience. One thing he told me that I will always remember was “in the workplace, you do not have friends, you have associates.” I’m now 5 years into my actual career, and I know exactly what he meant.
I have always known this but there is a simple way to know if someone you work with is actually a friend or just an associate. If they meet you outside of work on there day off then they are actual friends or more then just work mates. It's not just about work its meeting people at any place your lifes cross do you meet each other outside of that activity, if the answers no then they are also just associates.
Did he tell you thar after a hot session in the locker room
@@anti-narc1343 shhh that’s a secret!
Was his last name schrute?
Was he a travelling paper salesman with a passion for bears, beets, and Battlestar Galactica?
So true.. ain't no friends at the workplace.
You have the right to remain silent.
Anything you say or do can and will be held against you
LOL… I see what you did there 😂
True. Always be polite and professional. It builds class and character, which you can take anywhere. Do your job, get paid, go home. That’s the formula for every job in every field. If that gets old, then it’s time to move onto your next job and repeat. Until you retire.
Colleagues will gossip to you, about you and will say you did it all by yourself and will play the victim when shit hits the fan.
Preach!!!
😂Exactly!!
Learn this today. She lied on me when it saving her job. I’m done trusting
@@BigMike_RTTV😂😂😂😂 Absolutely true
facts sis
For me coworkers are two faced. We accomplish our tasks but I don’t trust them.
At the end of the day you really can’t because everyone will be loyal to their job before they’re loyal to you.
They really talk about one another and when you don’t participate the eyes jump to you
I told a co-worker about me going back to school and when I applied for a new position at work I learned that same co-worker tolded the hiring manager that I was back in school and couldn't give 100% dedication and she received the position I wanted and I had to train her on what she didnt know on top of that. I trust no one and especially at work.
She fucked you😂😂😂😂😂
So true. I met the worst of humanity at EVERY job I had. I could not understand why this was happening .
DON'T forget: Your co-workers are also NOT your enemies.
The great thing about a job thats genuinely demanding and difficult is that people dont have time for any of this bullshit. The weak are too busy thinking about walking out rather than how to slight you.
If they trying to take your job, they are
@@freshswagga100 It depends on the methods they use. co-workers usually don't try to kill anyone to get a job.
@@user123yxc theres a difference between enemies and murderers. Enemies are just anyone who oppose you
@@freshswagga100 I disagree. Enemies are people I want d34d.
I'm all for that divide. Where I currently work, people are in their feelings about me being quiet. I'm there to work. If I meet some decent people, yea, but it has been my experience that a majority of them are messy, so I keep my distance.
Which is the best route to go. There’s no sin in being quiet. People just hate what they don’t understand and can’t figure out. Keep doing you. 👍🏿💯
@@BigMike_RTTV 💯💯💯
I get called to the office often because people feel intimidated and get their feelings hurt when I stay quiet , it's not intentional , it's just how I am ,I'm a introvert and people drain my energy , it's not just at work, I'm like that with family and I can't change my personality and I won't change my personality to please someone else or make them feel comfortable. just like those who are introverts that talk too much - they get their energy from people , I don't expect them to change because that's who they are , but don't expect me to talk to you other than work related .
It's like that for me too!! They don't like it that i am quiet. I know if they asked me to dinner after work they will make fun of me being quiet.
❤❤💯👍
Coworkers and toxic management is the reason why I quit my last job. It was very saddening to me because I loved the technical aspect of the job itself. No matter how thick I think my skin is I had a limit for how much disrespect and outright sadism I could tolerate from staff. I also realized in the end how superficial relationships in the office is. Someone who I genuinely thought was my friend didn't hesitate to stab me in the back for their own gain within the company. I was really caught off guard when it happened because the whole act was so well executed, like sociopath level manipulation. Now I'm older and wiser and way more guarded.
Smiling faces sometimes
Pretend to be your friend
Smiling faces show no traces
Of the evil that lurks within..
-The Undisputed Truth, 1971
I do not mix business and personal. This is a very strong boundary for me. I do not hangout with people that I do work with.
✊🏿💯
💯 💯 🤘❤
Why not?
@@user-jh4wl3vp3ngossip
Depends on the person. I’ve hung out with coworkers, been to their homes and shit.
But these are also close friends around the same age or older.
Most other people, I just wouldn’t do that with that.
I learned this the hard way. The best thing is to stick to "harmless" topics. Politics, religion, deeply personal stuff and being too close to someone can backfire. The work environment tend to have toxic individuals who have motives that does not involve friendship. Also, the boss is never your friend. He/she can get you fired. There's a lot of narcissists and psychopaths in leadership roles. They lack empathy and thrive in environments where they are in control over others. They are gru, and we are the minions they place around working for them.
I also learnt the hard way, resulting in me leaving the workplace. I do freelance work now, and while I am client focused, I realise these people are not my friends and i am very careful about what I discuss with them. I agree the boss is never a friend and even if they think it is too hard to fire you, they can make your life hell, so that you resign.
General rule of life
Never talk about politics at work
Perfectly said
I disagree. As a Christian it's our duty to spread the gospel. If people hate me for it, so be it. Romans 8:31 "If God is with me who can be against me?"
I agree, never tell your co workers anything personal about your life,,
I preach this to my children, grandchildren and great grandchildren. You never; discuss your personal life at work, never say anything; that you don’t want to be repeated. It will be all over your work place. You are at work; to focus on doing your job. Not to create drama or be in drama. These people; aren’t family. They can twist something you said.
I consider my co-workers acquaintances, I had a co-worker in the middle of my shift call my boss and told him she caught me in the bathroom snorting something, I immediately contacted my boss and offered to do a drug test so it backfired on her and he fired her the next day.
My stepmother is gone now, but one of the things she taught me...Keep your job and personal life separate. I'm 46 now I been working at the same job for 22 years and I hold true to what she taught me.
💯💯💯
U probably be at work scaring ppl off 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 we know your type foh
@@dmoneydadon94Not saying I'm anti social or anything like that, I just keep the two separate...But yeah I know your type also, the weird idiot that makes assumptions and everyone just tolerate you but deep down they know you're special 😆😂
I learned this the hard way, I worked in the hotel industry a few years ago at a huge place, and thought I had real friends there so I confided on some personal marital problems I was going through to a few coworkers. Long story short half the place ended up knowing my personal problems and to this day I don't know which of those so called friends spilled the beans......
My only friend is my "Glock". He never borrows money, never borrows my car and never steals my coffee. Now that's a true friend.
LMAO!!!! Can't argue that one!
I stick to a 90/10 rule when speaking to coworkers: 90 percent work related conversation 10 percent other topics
Smart.
Me 99 percent work 1 percent ufc 😂
I like this! It’s just hard when they keep talking, so I tell them, ‘I have 10 minutes and that’s it, sorry I have a lot of work. ‘
I like that 💯💯💯
Got a little stopwatch you carry around? Jot it all down on a notepad?
I go to work mind my business and come home. Simple and plain.
As it should be done… Nothing wrong with that at all. 💯
Simple
Me too bruh ....
I ain’t going out after work
Me to an people till try to find a way around drama
My wife told me this SAME EXACT THING before I started my job at at the industrial plant.
Its crazy how ppl always say co workers aren’t your friends. Yet call everyone and anyone who send or accept a request on any social media platform. Their FRIENDS
The video is facts. I always keep everything work related. Even if someone ask what I did for the weekend. I always say I ran errands. I'm not telling you what I did for real. People will be trying to count your pockets based on your weekend activity. When I go on vacation. I just say I went to see friends and family. I don't give exact details. Now people don't like me because they can't figure me out. I bought a nice weekend ride and won't even bring that car to work. Its all in the game. Your coworkers can't manipulate you if you have limited information on you.
Intelligent comment. Love this
Not everyone is untrustworthy and manipulative.
You are right. But my experience has shown most people are jealous. You can have a simple life and most people will be jealous because you are happy about your life. @@deamateurjurist
Bingo!
Exactly, my coworkers will have a casual conversation with me and I just keep in simple and to the point. That is the best way to go. It’s ok to talk to your coworkers, but always keep it as short and sweet, regardless whether they’re trying to open up to you or not.
There's a reason that I try to say nothing but the truth about people at work. Gossiping and telling tales ultimately comes back to bite you.
😂I keep to myself go in work get stuff done leave I don’t say much they know that…do I care if them little lazy co workers talk about me nope I’m just gonna mind my business and keep being me work leave eat sleep and that’s it I need no friends I really don’t like talking and that it’s….
@lil-whiteog990 omg you hit the nail right on the coffin lol I can relate to everything you said. I've been exposed to so much phony mess from coworkers that I just stay to myself. I clock in, do my job, I do it good, get out of dodge, clock out & go home. I know I have haters but it is what it is. I don't lose no sleep over some fools that mean nothing to me.
I’m 62. Once in DC, some 40 years ago, a woman accosted myself and my mom. She grabbed us by our arms. She seemed like a homeless or mentally ill person. She was talking confusedly. But she basically said that coworkers will do evil things on the job. She said a coworker put something in her coffee to make her sick so that she would lose her job. And she did lose her job. I was young then and thought this woman was completely dreranged. But having worked various jobs over the years, I don’t think that what this woman said was entirely untrue. I believe some people on jobs will try to sabotage your progress and, possibly, get you fired.
It's good to be friendly and cordial but always maintain professionalism because if you get too comfortable, you may cross a line without knowing it. Also, if you make real friends at work then more power to you!
They may not be your buddies, but being friendly and polite is always good. We don't need more division.
As what I said in a nutshell 👍🏿
not there to be friends, I'm too busy for that....
Yea we do
Being professional yes. Otherwise no.
Its OK to be friendly but just don't get too personable. Don't tell your personal business. I remember my coworkers seeing me as a threat because the work came so easy to me so they'd think I was way smarter then them. Smh The same ppl talking behind my back were the same ones asking me how to fix something. I'd show them what I would do, they'd do it. Then they would get the credit for it lol. But I still wouldn't care because I was confident in my own work. But if laugh when I'd see them accepting the credit, knowing it was all my idea etc.
Be a business environment associate. That's it. I could move on and you wouldn't know until my last day of employment. No parties, no gifts. I'm out. Bye. It's about money and progression. Thanks for everything.
FACTS! 🙏🏿💯
lol thats the exact thing Im doing right now.
That is typical my thing, I move on and never tell anyone that I would quit or anything, they can only find out on my last day of employment, let people at work know nothing about you, that is the way to go, more importantly, don't tell them your next move or your plan, cause you never know if they would try to sabotage you.
You don't have to become friends with colleagues, but why wouldn't you want a party/gifts? There is a clear difference between a working relationship that remains only in the workplace and a relationship with colleagues outside of it. Being nice in the workplace itself doesn't mean you have to see them outside.
I worked at a job for 12 years...... I put in my notice until my supervisor didn't want an announcement.....4-5 days before I left people started asking me what was what I told them that I was still going to be working there part-time just so they would back up. My last day I smiled and keptit pushing
Sadly the friendlier and more social people tend to get promoted where I work. They know the most about everyone and their families.
I have been betrayed by coworkers all my career because I trust and wear my heart on my sleeve. The problem is that management thrives on creating a peer-to-peer competitive environment. This causes people to do and say anything to get ahead or a promotion at your expense, especially when you are a high-producer. So I learned co-workers are not your friends and that goes for your supervisor who could be threatened by your high-production and quality of work too.
Yep, my manager was threatened by my over-achievement. She was worried that I would take her job or be HER boss in the future. I quickly move out of that department and let her lazy employees failed her. I can't stop laughing to this day!!!
@@LaoSoftware I had same experience. A manager was giving my credit to a co-worker and got him promoted by it. It was thoroughly disgusting behavior, I got out from under her as quick as possible and never looked back.
I felt this deep down in my spirit! The spirit of jealousy & competition in the workplace is unreal. Thanks for this reminder. 💯💯🎯
Facts, still this makes no sense to me. I'm just working for a pay check, that's all.
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The one thing that companies try to push that makes me laugh internally is “we are a family “
hr will fire you
Yeah you’ll see how much of a family y’all are when their back is against the wall.
Hahaha heard that one
@@AnthonyManzio then people will blame you for a decision u can’t even make.(programming)
@@techwin1048 HR IS ONLY THERE FOR THE COMPANY NOT THE STAFF. Ask any lawyer.
I recently retired after 26yrs as a Soldier, the biggest thing I learned very early is:
There are two types of people in the military …people in the military and then you have Soldiers, Marines etc. My friends are at the house.
💪✊ I go to work to make $, not to make friends! Salute!
After being burned countless times by co-workers, I have always found it best to just keep a certain amount of distance from them. While some are nice, most are not, and will stab you in the back the moment they think they can get away with it. I try to remain friendly, but it's also hard when you work around a bunch of people who act like they are in HS still and are all friends outside of work. To make things even worse, when you dont fit in with their group, you become the outcast. It gets quiet at work most days, and I dont really talk with anyone, but I keep to myself and try to remain friendly when I need to.
💯💯💯
most jobs really are extensions of high school/college... you'd think ppl of age would mature, but i've seen the same level of gossip of my younger days lol
You have to be 100% careful around the nice ones those are the dangerous ones who have eyes like snakes and a face as cute as a puppy.
I worked at Motorola in the 1980s. Same thing. I worked very hard and learned the entire build process for building missiles. It didn't make a difference. Why? Because, I didn't play on the softball team and go drinking with the "guys" or the manager. When they went and rated all of us as Quality Assurance inspectors, I was rated in the bottom 33% but I knew exactly why. And the worst was when you kept hoping for the raise the manager promised you but it never came. 8 years there. I went from $6.75 and hour to $10.05. $3.30 raise in 8 years. And just to make a point, being white, doesn't give you "any" privilege either. Blessings to all!
sometimes you have to mingle a lil' bit with your coworkers, you cant just be totally aloof. dont have to be the best of friends either, but gotta be social every now and then just so ppl dont cut you out of good raises/opportunities. sucks that it is that way, but just the way the game goes@@googlewalle8904
People think I'm mysterious at work and it makes them very uneasy to the point where they make stuff up about me.
Sucks for you. Try to be a better person to people and stop being stuck up. Or "mysterious " if that's what you wanna call it
You’re doing something right if they have to make stuff up😂😂
Trust none of them. I’ve see grown middle aged men gossip like little girls.
Most workplaces are like junior/high school.
Coworkers + Friends = Conflict of interest
I agree 100% with what you’re saying. I’ve tried to tell my wife the same same thing. She’s a speech pathologist working in a school. There’s so much jealousy between her coworkers. I tell her not to over value her relationships at work. She has learned the hard way over the years. It’s very difficult to accept people as you get older and wiser. You can see through people and can recognize if they are genuine.
Sadly she will have to learn the hard way
Schools are breeding grounds for gossip and Jealousy. Most school staff are women and you already know how that goes.
Exactly!
I couldn’t careless what people say when I’m NOT In the room but I definitely know when my presence is felt, once I step foot in it I don’t care who doesn’t like or care for me, the paycheck is what I’m there for if we speak cordially then that’s it, please DON’T force yourself on me because I’ll ignore you, and you won’t like it one bit so tread lightly‼️… You’ve got to be careful with these miserable souls that pretend real well‼️
Humans are awful. Animals are better
I remember back when I believed this was true. Then I got a little older and learned that people would rather work with someone they liked than someone that is actually competent. This attitude will cost you a whole lot.
Right! There’s a balence that nearly everyone in the comments sections absolutely doesn’t have. It’s staggering how many comments on here are like “I tell my coworkers I’m here to make money and not friends” and, “your coworkers are obstacles to your success”.
Like bro you might just be the problem 😂
It also says a lot about your judgement if you are constantly getting "screwed over". Well what's the common denominator there? I agree that you should never over-share, but you are going to be very lonely possessing the attitude in this video and much of the comments section. I have violated quite a bit of the advice in this video and it has never bit me in the butt. But I also quickly felt who I could trust and who I should stay away from and I have been 100% right every time.
To each their own opinion… However I’ve seen some of the sweetest harmless people get screwed over by people they thought were their friends… If that’s not your experience then good for you, but I never get on here and speak on things I haven’t seen firsthand. And I have stated that I’ve met friends at work but I’m also aware that not ALL coworkers have your best interest in mind.
You clearly missed the message… You’re saying that as if I said to be a stone cold bastard. That’s not what I said. I get it though… This isn’t for everyone which is fine:
Never ask someebody a question unless you are ready to be asked the same question.
This is exactly why we should NOT be bummed out if somebody doesn't talk to us as we'd like or if they don't talk to us as much as someone else, we have to remember we aren't at work to make friends. That's not meant in a negative way at all, we just need to be aware of being professional vs personal, and don't confide personal thoughts or info with them if you wouldn't say it to your boss/manager.
You don't need to have a deep conversation with your co-workers, but you still need to be cordial and polite to all. If someone doesn't talk to us, it's okay. Respect their personal space. Life is short.
The only way around this is asking these people questions, let them talk, you just listen, always works 😂
😂 Tells you all you need to know
ive gotten so many connections this way, they spill their guts, then i take that to HR to report lol......People are easy, just be a mirror, reflect them on themselves, we all love ourself, so when you see your mirror image in a person, its easy to get along.
@@Kjhd9987hyso ur one of them ppl who snitch to try get a promotion? Your literally the people he was talking about in the video 🤢
yeah catching people smoking weed and driving a forklift is snitching, drinking on the job is snitching. fucking the parking lot while your husband also works there is snitching. A area manager covering for a hot little girl that constantly fucks up and reporting his actions to HR is snitching. Youre just a worthless bag of shit. What do you think im paid to do? @@aceboogie5054
@@Kjhd9987hyyour the same type person he’s talking about in this video
I was "LET GO" from my job after 26 yrs.because of the poke, and i remember when i first started, a co-worker at that time was about to retire and one of the first talks was about this very same topic and sure enough, the communications dwindled after about 2 months, and going on 2 years i have deleted and blocked ALL of them. After working there 26 years, thank goodness that i didn't take it personal after that pep-talk when i started.
Right on brother! Got thrown under the bus for over sharing my opinions. Gotta remind myself to keep to myself and not be ashamed of it.
I am a quiet person by nature and so I don’t talk alot but I’m always there to help anyone but I have been working long enough to know that it just pays to stay to myself especially when it comes to alot of women co workers when all we do is have this compete and complain attitude and the sad part is I work remotely and see this all the time.
Yes I feel that… It just pays to distance yourself from that drama. I’m the same way for the most part. I hate foolishness.
I am the same way @Ms Anthony 211.
My co-workers think I’m stand-offy because I don’t spend my breaks drinking coffee and gossiping with them in the break room. They hate me for it, and many of them treat me like I’m invisible as a result. At the homeless shelter I work at, you can’t tell the people that work there anything without it spreading around the whole workplace like a flu outbreak, and I want absolutely no part of that. Your co-workers are not your friends, and HR is your worst enemy, as they only exist to protect the company from you, not the other way around. Anybody who fails to realize this is either ignorant or foolish
This is 1000 % true! I had some coworkers that always wanted to hang out and I was always repulsed by it! Well after more than a year working I finally decided to give them a chance and I was immediately repulsed again so I ignored them again but they wanted to hang out again and again but I just didn’t want to and I honestly sensed they admired me but I’m here to work not be your hero or savior lol …. Anyways I ended up moving to a better job with no coworkers and I’m so glad I left that behind and I have a new number and I can finally forget about those weird coworkers 😂
I’m sorry but your comment is hilarious😂😂. Repulsed. They disgusted you that bad🤣🤣🤣
@@lisatryme3518 because they would always complain at work and it got annoying and I figured they were the same outside of work so I never wanted to accept invites to hang out with them! After over a year you get used to people somewhat so I decided to go out with them on a night I was bored and not doing anything and I regretted it because all they did was complain about work the whole time and talk trash about other coworkers and I was more than repulsed after that ! 😂
@@lisatryme3518this aint even my comment but yes, repulse! I had a few coworkers at my summer break during college job ask me if we were ever going to see each other after I quit. Let’s find out!
Thanks. You are right. You have to be careful about what you say and who you say it to.
Absolute FACTS!!!
Don't go to ANY Baby Showers or First Homecomings either. They want a gift but don't even talk to you at work. 😂
😂😂😂
same applies to Birthdays 🎉
Yes yes yes one boss was pregnant. Not one coworker told me. They knew what she was having. Not one coworker told me. She had a baby shower. I didn’t bother. If I can’t be included in the joy then don’t bother putting your hand out for the gift. They should have passed the hat around though to give a few dollars. And then someone should have gone to the store and bought the presents. But instead, each person brought a gift individually. So, the boss knew who didn’t give her a gift. That was bad. Talking about retaliation. Now she’s pregnant again .I asked a coworker if she was pregnant. He said no. Wow. These people are evil.
Exactly!
@@snowbunny1285maybe she just had a big lunch.
I always tell everyone whenever I start a new job. I am not here to make friends. I am here to work, get paid, and go home.
If I heard someone say that on the first day, I would not want to work with them. Not because I don’t agree with what you said, because I do, but it lacks emotional intelligence; especially if said in a group setting. Something’s are better left “unsaid”.
Way to go. Smart man. 👍
And thats why they dont like you lol. They call you "no fun aaron"
@@daguywhoknowz2638yea. Very autistic thing to say to new coworkers lol
So rude. Best just dont talk much to them
My last job had coworkers joining & quitting the team left & right, very rarely would someone stick around for longer than a couple of months. Out of all of them there was only 1 person out of dozens of temporary employees that I was cool with & we still keep in contact with each other till this day many years later, almost like long-lost distant cousins we got along instantly with no issues whatsoever
Co workers are not your friends, this is the best advise you are giving. I agree 1000%.. my best part is the tedious process it takes for people that comes your way. Lol.. im the same way. People always refer to me as secretive, for a good reason, people can be devious, they can pretend they care when they dont, of course to get the most they can out of you, then use it against you, thats why i dont have best friend, im always guard up.
Recently at work, one of my coworkers told me that other coworkers/partners that works in different departments thinks I'm an asshole because I won't acknowledge them----being too sociable at work comes with a lot of stigmas and could potentially backfire on--right off the back, people are going to think you're gullible, stupid, naive, dumb etc I rather people to think I'm an asshole to think to think I'm stupid---I heard coworkers gossip about other coworkers who wasn't presence and that's why I refuse to interact with people who works with me... coworkers are fake and phony.
Yer alot of people at My workplace thought I was wired but I dont really care what they think as it's just work couldn't care less what they think. Those people who know you enough be associates or actual friends are the only onces matter and they know you enough not to listen to ballshxx.
Human nature
Yeah, that's just called being human. Most people do it, even you, one way or another
When I left a job I was at for 5 years and no one contacted me after I was constructively dismissed after I was injured at work. That was pretty eye opening.
It's pretty easy to know who's a friend and who's a associate you just ask them if they would be interested in meeting up outside of work and if the answers no you have your answer they are associates and that's perfectly fine with Me.
Same dude, I worked at a place for 2 1/2 years got injured, and got fired for it. It’s definitely salt in the wound when the people you worked alongside for so long didn’t care either. I literally had a piece of metal run through my face…Not one text or call after to see how I was. Coworkers are the fakest of friends 😂 Luckily I healed real well, and the scar is almost gone. Also I ended up getting a new job that pays $10 more an hour. So honestly some times work out for the better. I got the fake people out of my life, and more money in my pocket, win, win.
Saw an example of a friendly young woman get burned so bad because she opened up to some people on the job. She ended up leaving the job cause it got so bad.
I appreciate this video. I recently began having this mentality at work because I’d gotten burned so many times. I started just making small talk and keeping things light, instead of trying to make everyone my immediate friend. Recently, this person who I could tell right off the bad wasn’t a good person (she gave me a bad gut feeling) said within an hour of meeting me that she thinks I’d do better living in the Midwest because “people there don’t like intellectual conversation either”. I was floored. I’m a deep thinker and I’m constantly ruminating on deep topics, but I’ve LEARNED not to show that side of myself to just anyone. Needless to say, that comment was hurtful, but at least I know my new method is working. I don’t want people like that in my business anyway.
For some reason, some seem to seek to humiliate you, diminish you even when you stay focused on being kind. 2 years later, you still find yourself walking into a sort of mental warzone... I wouldn't have guessed work life was like this, and I thank God this video came my way 🙏❤️
So true! I experience this everyday, I’m not the nicest person in the world but most of the time I feel like I’m the nicest person at my job and I only get shit on for it
You 100% right on. I used to beat myself up for not being social at work, great video sir.
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New sub. Retired from the Navy in 2004 after 20yrs of service. Great content! Agree with everything you just mentioned. I’ve been on my current job for 19yrs. You are 💯 on everything.
Thank you for subscribing I appreciate you. And thank you for your service from from one vet to another! 🫡
At my last job in the news industry, my department boss told me to "interact with the newsroom" and "ask them questions". I don't know why I had to ask them questions when I can just go straight to her because she'd know the answer. STUPID. People are leaving the news industry in droves because of toxic workplaces & low pay
Yup, just listen to "Backstabbers" by the OJay's.
I have carried this same mentality from my military career into the civilian world. It has served me well. It has probably cost me a friendship here and there, but it's also kept me out of a lot of animosity in the workplace over the years. Another name for this philosophy could be that classic expression "Don't 💩 where you eat!"
Facts I feel that… Same here. Some think I’m antisocial, but it bothers me none. I speak when I have to and watch what I say cause people twist your words up so much.
@@BigMike_RTTVI understand that too well. They think I'm scared or whatever. But the main reason is that I like to keep to myself and I don't want my name to be called when BS happens.
❤❤❤
@@BigMike_RTTVthey be thinking a nigga be scared of me. I say quote “ Hell nah I’m feeding my family so leave me alone or we can handle this shit after work since you hating so hard “ I don’t condone violence but if somebody all in my face then it’s up. Dont be mad at me because I don’t wanna be yo friend nigga fuck wrong with you I’ll go file and complaint and call the cops for harassment. Them white folks ain’t let me down yet all the snitching and telling I do at work.
@@BigMike_RTTVI stay snitching on people bro
I'm standoffish and keep to myself because it works for me and I have no pity for others feelings. They're messy and don't deserve my company.
The same can definitely be said about schoolmates.
If I could, I would work for myself. Sometimes, it's very exhausting to work for others - there's gossip, people trying to shift the blame onto you, and disrespectful bosses.
Narcissistic bosses
you can and should. most wealth used to be from small to medium businesses. As those have decreased so has the number of wealthy people.
I couldn’t agree with you more!!! If I could be my own boss I would. And I say this with a lot of humility, but I’m too smart for these people, they act like they own me, when it’s them who should be following me, but it is what it is.
One who are saying this you can find what you good at that can make money 365 any weather or pandemic invest an be patient
Needed this fr. I always do my own thing, stay in my own lane, step on nobody toes. Yet thats all they do to me. Everything is a competition to them when all I'm doing is my job. They cant "beat" me so they go as far as copying everything i do. From how i walk and talk to how i do my job and converse with people. Its draining as hell and sometimes leaves me depressed but i just gotta remain focused. I'm a leader and will continue to serve my God given purpose despite their actions. Thanks for the video man 💪🏾💯
I learned it years ago. Your correct. They get mad when your secretive and they tell all of their personal life. 😂
Perfectly said! Thank you!
I approve this message 100%, I have seen people get fired especially with the work relationship turns sexual men and women, that gets messy real quick. None of that here Period. It is not worth your money!
Amen!!!
Never fck your companie. Its a wise sayin^^
that's the worse kind. I also advise people to not date at work. I for sure learned my lesson quick
Sometimes it is worth your money. Great experience and memories ❤❤❤
@@goldbrick2563now u not making any money at all cuz u couldn’t control yourself at work
Glad I seen this. I was pure pressure to give a co-worker a ride home twice & I didn’t feel comfortable doing it, but she kept begging that she really needed a ride so I gave it to her, & I tried running to my car the second time to avoid it, but another co worker was like “Don’t leave her here by herself without giving her a ride home” like thats supposed to be my fucking problem . I’m 19 and was 18 at the time, & she’s 50 years old (And a manager) and I can’t believe she would pressure A 18 year old who recently completed high school to do such a big task like that & I felt like what I did was dangerous & not safe . I don’t work there no more & I Quit that job 4 months ago .
Lmaooo u was power walking huh 😆
oh man what the hell thats so weird!!!! im 20 and i would not feel comfortable with a complete stranger in my car. i'd smile and be polite and say "its not my responsibility sorry, but i can give you a number for a taxi to call instead" try and style it next time, i know you said ur not there anymore but just incase it happens again. dont let them walk all over you!!!
Everyone pretty much has a phone and debit card these days. They can Uber lol
@@sofiastar2933 Yeah, I’ve gotta work on not letting pure pressure get to me because I already knew it was dangerous before I did it but she just wouldn’t stop begging .
@@BigMike_RTTV Yeah, I could’ve asked her if she could uber, but I wasn’t thinking at the moment & felt like under pressure to do it so that’s why I did it
Thanks for this! I needed the reminder
Wow, your right on the money. I’m in the medical field ( been at the same place since 7/26/99) and love taking care of people. I’m way too trusting and open,,, but I’ve been lucky so far. Only a few problems here and there. I just love people and want to friend everybody but you just can’t do that. Anyway I’m tired and ranting lol. Excellent info, also appreciate your service. New sub here.