If Hard Seltzer Ads Were Honest | Honest Ads
ฝัง
- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 25 ก.ค. 2024
- White Claw Summer is out, and Horton's Hard Poison Fizzy Summer is IN.
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Roger Horton: Jack Hunter
Writer: Tara Marie
Director: Dave Brown
Assistant Director: Jordan Breeding
Director of Photography: Daryl Pittman
Editors: Jordan Breeding, Dave Brown
Sound: Mike Schoen
Seltzer Woman: Katie Culligan
Set Designer: Caitie Hirabayashi
Production Assistant: Ruda Yi
Product Design: Greg Breeding
Tara's Twitter: / taramariewords
Tara's Comic Book: devils-due-1first-comics.mysh...
Jordan’s Twitter: / the_j_breeding
Jordan's TH-cam Channel: / @drjordanbreeding
Dave’s Instagram: / deforestbrown
Caitie's Instagram: / caitiehira
00:00 - If Hard Seltzer Was Honest
03:31 - Hard Kombucha
03:57 - Hard Candies!?
04:46 - A Look Behind The Curtain
#HardSeltzer #WhiteClaw #HonestAds - ตลก
Someone once described the taste of Whiteclaw as “TV static while someone yells the name of a fruit from another room” and I
can’t help thinking that fits here
That is perfect! That's the taste exactly!
I thought that's what La Croix tastes like.
But it made my burps taste like carbonated water & Karen hairspray.
Holy shit. That's fucking spot on and genius at the same time.
@@tehevilengineer7939
It is, whoever his friend is stole that line and applied it to white claw.
"MIDDLE-AGED KIDS"
Oh god, that's it. That's the thing.
You're not my weekend dad!
What thing
Tell us the thing
The thing we 30ish year olds have come to realize lately....we're not that young anymore haha. I heard someone describe my year of birth as "the late 1900s" and I was like oh...fuck 😦
I snorted so hard when he said that! Jeez Rog, ease up 🥲
I absolutely want a shirt with "grab life by the booty-shaped fruits".
Seconded!!
Inbox me I’ll make you one
I’d buy that!
I'll buy that for a dollar.
@@919prodigyHow do u even inbox someone in youtube
“We’ll make bourbon infused cashew milk if we have to” 😂😂😂
The writers on this series are genius and Rodger ties it all up in a nice perfect package
Love Roger showing the psychology used in making advertisements.
Y'know he needs to do an episode of Adam Ruins everything but instead just keep interrupting the host with his own satirical even more honest ways of putting things
It's satire but the message still gets through. These corporations are a cancer to humankind, and their going to kill us off eventually.
@@jzblue345 corporations are just people operating under a government recognized business entity, im a solo truck driver and my company is a corporation. The problem is people blindly believing anything they see on the TV instead of actually stopping to think about it logically.
There's a bit from American Gods about how the only difference between certain products is the branding: th-cam.com/video/5tfjJcLmyfY/w-d-xo.html
"We'll make bourbon infused cashew milk if we have to."
Don't tempt them.
WRITE THAT DOWN! - Some Hip drink manufacturing Company
There's already almond Baileys. Not to mention the endless brands of real bourbon that felt the need to make a 'cream' product. I'm sure there's a cashew version of some kind of liquor.
Water, coffee, beer, and whiskey. Those should be the only options after 18.
Scariest part is this is the most honest part of the video 😂😂
If there's one thing I've learned from The Babylon Bee over the past five years, it's that parody + time = reality.
"Milk on the rocks" 🤣🤣
As a beer store clerk, I can verify this as 100% accurate.
Canadian eh!
Between the writers script and Jack's delivery, these are some of the best productions ever.
"Horton's Hard"? No wonder he's sitting in that pool the whole time.
And there it is😫🤣
He's got his eye on the redhead, and you know, sometimes when a man likes a woman very much.....
@@markh.6687 Oof, grandpa best not be eyeing this redhead. XD
So glad these guys are back at making videos, Roger for president🙏🏽😂
He would be a horrible president but at least honest about it.
Roger for GLOBAL LEADER.
I nominate Roger to be god.
Roger would get impeached so fast bc of his honesty. Successful politicians just deny everything and call their haters conspiracy theorists
And VP 😁
Roger 4 president, let's go Brandon!
"Brain murdering peach fart flavored earth blood" just got you 1 more subscriber.
"It tastes almost as good as companionship"
I can’t quite express how happy I am to have Roger back in my life.
Never ever unsubscribe from a channel you love even just a part of just because there are no uploads on the channel anymore.
The day I saw there was a new Roger video was the day I knew TH-cam just might have a hope after all
Me too!
My depression is cured now with comedy
Facts! Same here
Cynically delicious, almost refreshing.
So good!
At "we spend your money ironically too" I just lost my f*cking mind!🤣🤣🤣
This guy deserves an Oscar, his own show, hell! Make him president of the world!
"You drunk baby?"
(Oh my poor side!)
4:10 🖐🤣x3
"Ya know, thinking about the millions of people without access to clean drinking water really makes this insult against God just taste that much sweeter." 😂 I'm laughing cause it's funny but also crying cause it's sad af. Oh my God, that single frame of Jordan wearing a wig in the kiddie pool lmao
It's more like 884+ million people(Source: UN 2019) but that would be too sweet!
Who cares. Long as my kids have water.
Certainly makes one a little less inclined to buy Nestle (etc.) products, doesn't it? Well, assuming one has a conscience... but a surprisingly large portion of the population still does, to some extent!
@@BeaverChainsaw it may be 1/7 of the world or as many as 1 billion people now! :(
Insult against god? What god? Do you mean the one who sends missionaries into those places where they have no clean drinking water and instead of drilling wells and teaching them self sufficiency, ecological farming and irrigation, and population control, ships in food and water and teaches them all about their make believe sky daddy, only to leave them with nothing learned and in worse condition than when they showed up, as soon as they have them believing in a different type of nonsense than the one they already had? You know their evil paganism (another useless false belief) that lead to them to not advancing and improving their quality of life in the first place? You know, the god that instead of promoting science and reason to prolong life and fight disease AKA HOW to think, and insted WHAT to think no matter how irrational and irresponsible? The same god who would rather have people live in misery to insure they suck up to him in wishful thinking that would or even can help, when he clearly doesn't give a shit (Because he doesn't exist)? The god who encourages them to breed like rabbits in order to make "Warriors for his army", so they can put his misery on others and then die with "Dignity" as Mother Theresa called it when instead of helping she just aided the spread of disease and insured a good flow of souls for "His kingdom", with nothing but unanswered prayers and unfulfilled hopes, and a fear of hell? That god?
I DON'T THINK SO! Your god is an insult to human intelligence, and his followers are the ones holding humanity back, as well as the most likely to own businesses that exploit and gain the system, selling pipe dreams, as well as the majority of customers more likely to fall for their scams, and promoting a system wherein they can get away with it!
The fact that he is sitting in a baby pool th whole time makes it all so much better
With eggshell foam in blue underneath.
It’s a heavily underrated part of this whole video, Heavily!!
“We’ll make bourbon infused cashew milk if we have to.” 😆💀
"Just as long as they're Horton brand alcoholics" killed me
We own you...and your children." 🤔
Do “if sports betting apps were honest!”
This please!
Or "if stock market trading apps were honest" both decieve you to siphon your money as much as possible lmao
Online casinos
Aka trying to make gambling cool
Damn, that would hit a lot of people really hard!
Ain't no party like a Roger party, 'cuz a Roger party is depressingly poignant.
"You may be drinking this ironically. Don't worry, we spend your money ironically too." I'm dead
The narration, the background lady, and the music make this a masterpiece. I think this might be their best one and that’s saying a lot 😂😂😭😭
Horton's Handies made me choke on my tea 🤣
YUMMY
If handies are making you choke, you are likely performing a slightly different action...
Sorry, had to, it was right there.
Hope it was Horton's Hard Tea.
I'd really be interested if there's outakes for these, or does Roger just nail it in the first take?
Ha sometimes those trickier lines will get him.
@@cracked Well then let's see that bloopers reel
@@paulchro_ Haha maybe someday
I don’t know how he keeps a straight face half the time!
@@cracked the team under the last ownership said that now look at where they are
Other countries: OK, so there's alcohol in this, and it's got sweet carbonated water which we call soda pop. Let's call this thing an AlcoPop.
the USA: hard seltzer
Every time I watch these it’s instant happiness. Awww to sh!t on people’s reality, warms my heart.
That last scene of Jordan dancing across in his wig and bathrobe, with the boom operater shaking his head at him was just perfect.
Nothing will ever top "you drunk baby?" lmao 🤣
Searched the comments for this - I totally lost it when she said that 😂
Haha and the baby falling 🤣
I heard stories where parents would put alcohol in baby's mouth
@@freedomdude5420 sure it would put me to sleep
@@wtfbugs 🤣🤣
As someone who loves hard seltzers, this was hilarious. I wouldn't drink them if they weren't poison though. that's the point.
I can't drink these or regular water seltzer drinks, I'd rather lick butts than drink this crap
@@tinaprice4948 I go through cycles of drinking beer for a while, getting tired of it, then drinking seltzers for a while then going back to beer.
Have you ever considered trying anything else out of the vast range of poisons that are available?
@@sixstringedthing I do. but a lot of times I only have gas stations within walking distance of me at 12:30 am. I don't care much for wine, so it's usually beer and seltzers when the liquor stores are closed.
...Plus Caleb doesn't have running water or a refrigerator to keep that and other beverages cool for long periods.
“The next drink you like, we’ll make a hard version of that too” clearly cracked hasn’t come across hard Kombucha. (YES ITS REAL. The brand I tried is called “booch”.)
I love it when the corporation guys say "we own you"
I was done when she said “beer?! Eww!”🤣🤣
4:17 " you drunk baby?"
🤣🤣🤣💯🤣🤣🤣🤣
Love that these are coming back, one of the best video series Cracked has ever done!
The Best Part Of TH-cam 2021 has been the return of Roger Honestly
You mean, "The Best Part Of -TH-cam- 2021 has been the return of Roger Honestly"
God this year hasn't been good.
Roger should run for president and do an Honest Ad from the White House. Horton 2024!
I agree a follow up is in order, but I think he did an honest presidential ad
His honest debate is so timeless
Bad idea. He would likely be assassinated by the other politicians / leaders of other countries. Don't be honest about countries like North Korea or CENSORED or CENSORED about human rights.
He might just become one at this point
@@brandonboewe6198 campaign ads yes. No honest messages from the oval office yet.
I should know better!
Almost choked when the lady said: Are you drunk baby?
"You drunk baby" LOL.
That fight club inspired banana frame has me dying 😂
DON'T FORGET THE FIRST RULE
@@cracked damn i already blew it
I was scrolling the comments hoping someone mentioned that!
I love watching Roger before others for some illogical reason.
It's important
Life goals. 🤷🏽♂️
@@cracked You just can't top the sarcasm in Roger's voice.. and his smooth delivery! Best ad-man ever! 🤣
It's about time someone spoke the truth about this. I'd still like to see you give a healthy dose of honesty to those "We'll get you out of trouble with the IRS" companies.
I think they did so good advertising it I wouldn't be surprised if this actually drove people to try it, even people who knew it was supposed to be ironic
Jordan was just a figment of Rodger's imagination this whole time. I am Jack's complete lack of surprise
Oh no!
I love how Horton's manner of speaking is even able to induce the emotion these commercials try to invoke.
I like the new format, the slightly tweaked background noise, like ohhs and ahhs and profits. Beautiful way to rub the point in even harder. It just adds that extra layer of punch so to speak. Roger again had me laughing out of my seat. I am so glad you guys are back!
"You drunk, baby?"
I fking lost it at that cutaway
I was wondering, "They know what 'Horton's Hard' sounds like, right? Or do they?" Then "Horton's Handies" pops up on the screen. Oh, yeah. They knew what they were doing.
No doubt an unofficial side gig for Horton's "Technically-not -a-whorehouse"^^
Perfect thing to drink while reading That timeless classic, "Horton Hires a Ho"
ROTFL!!!
ONE OF THE BEST ONES YET!!!
I'm a bartender, so, this hits home, in a wonderful way.
Bravo!
I love these honest skits!!! I live for these!!!
Arguably one of the better honest ads I've seen
Anyone remember Zima? That came out when I was overseas. I got back to the states and people are raving about this new not-beer. Tasted like watered down antifreeze. But with a somehow worse after taste. Like if you sprayed random insecticides from under your kitchen sink together and took a big gulp.
I love how the actress’ eyes are the same shade of green as the can! You guys put in so much effort for even the little details. Well done!
Uh... both the eyes and the can are several shades of green. There's no such specific matching.
Could have been coincidence.
Look....BUBBLES!
Kudos to the writers. This is a true TH-cam Gem
I miss these videos !
This is basically new haha.
@@cracked I meant I miss the uploads... Videos were always gold !
Hard seltzer isn't a thing where I'm from but advertising is. I loved the insights. And dancing Jordan at end was the cherry on this marketable cake.
Yeah, never heard of hard seltzer. Everyone around here is still on the hard sickly sweet lolly water. That hard Kombucha or hard nut -milk- water though would sell like crazy I'm sure.
Seems like the wine cooler craze of the 80's. All seem like girly drinks to me. Oh wait, not supposed to say things like that now days. My bad. Beer for me. If it ain't broke, don't fix it.
As someone who can't even stance the scent of alcohol, that is _particularly_ horrifying.
Damn sucks for you
@@AirQuotes ...Does it though? Even _if_ i didn't find the stuff absolutely revolting, i'm not the kind to throw myself at mental and motor impairment. Gonna be real, my hate or raw tomatoes is way worse to deal with..!
At least i have no (known) food allergies.
@@KaedeLanyo you probably ate the shit tomatoes which tastes absolutely awful. You should eat the good ones. It's hard to get it in USA (Asumming that you are from US) but you can get it by growing them or maybe you have eaten the good ones but have an awful taste
@@tesstickle6974 Just, a biological response, really. Tomatoes are shockingly complex, and folk like me have enhanced and lowered taste of specific parts of it. And no, not US, upstairs neighbour. Did "have" home-grown tomatoes, grandmother always has had a garden, it's, absolutely the same for me, maybe a bit sweeter? But doesn't remove the nasty-tasting parts.
“So you need us to do it for you”
Amazing.
(4:01) "Feauturing candies from your childhood, however long ago OR PRESENTLY OCCURRING that childhood may be." 🤣
This shit is too damn funny. This shit taste like incense😅
At first I thought he said Incest
And was like
WTF does that taste li......nevermind I don't wanna know
@@zaczane Folgers: taste the incest.
@@kryptonianguest1903 Not exactly "good to the last drop," that's for sure.
Oh wait, that's Maxwell House...never mind.
@@zaczane I actually thought he said "insects" myself.
@@zagnorch1336 right.... folgers was "the best part of waking up is folgers in your cup" ... I'm not even going to go there😂
“Are you drunk baby?” 🤣 This was a 10/10 on the funny scale, right up there with SNL’s recent spoof on hard seltzer! - Hey Kombucha, you’re next!
😄
This got me too. Brought it over the edge. :)
Lost it on that one too!! 😂🤣😂
I've never tried this stuff, but you just about have me talked into it.
I love these vids, you guys crack me up 👌🏾
Hard Seltzer is just reverse engineered wine coolers. Change my mind.
They’re wine coolers but waaay less sweet. That way you can drink one after the other after the other… just like light beer with less flavor!
@@micahhittinger6083 less is more...[singing] more, more, more
, how do you like it? how do you like it?...
Milk on the rocks. I died laughing ha.
banana and cherry flavoured. 🍌🍒
Thank You for bringing these back!
1:26 So much freshness, Roger had to change his pants.
I absolutely love the "I single-handedly revived Cracked" dance by Dr. Breeding at the end.
Thanks for doing it up again Roger, Keep 'em coming!
Will do!
The best yet! Keep em coming, Roger!
These are so amazing. Roger deserves so much credit!
Gonna use all my rodgecoin to buy Huboocha.
SEe that's just smart
Don't forget the heroin and feet pics!
Whenever i see any kind of hard seltzer, i immdiately think of that clip of the leader of the proud boys trying to be tough, talking about his mango white claw 😂😂😂😂😂
This had my dying omg good job needed a laugh with my coffee
Roger, Roger, Roger... Once again, you show up just in time. Another hilarious and too painfully accurate video. My neighbour's two kids went to U and one of them def has a problem with alcohol, now. He drinks these frigging fizzy booze products like they're water. Apparently one of the makers was heavily sponsoring some events over the past two yrs and he's been literally seduced. 😟
Yeah White Claw in particular have done a great job at making themselves seem fun but "healthy" and easy going. It's pretty crazy.
It's really easy to convince yourself "well it's only 50 calories" but then you drink half a dozen of them...
OK boomer 🤣
@@wookman9112 My neighbor's two kids is doing weeds now after they went away to U. They're in the devil's grip now.
@@wookman9112 take another booster shot - everything is fine.
Yall jammed so many jokes in here that I had to rewind multiple times...hope it counts towards multiple views... love these Horton ads! 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣❤💯🙌🏿
We neeeeeed more of these keep cranking em out
i needed this thank yall😌
"You want to grab life by the booty shaped fruits"
How'd they know??
market research.
Grandpa: "Hey kiddo, go get us a few Handies from Grandma, but don't tell your parents ;) "
"Handies"? Grandpa and grandma are into some Alabama stuff
"Cursed phrase! Cursed phrase!"
“You drunk baby” great line
Is it for the taste? Me taking a mouthful, ahhhh ... nope it definitely not the taste 😅
I haven't had a drink in months. Roger has sold me, gonna get pisstanked on clear fizzy bullshit.
I wait for these materials every day, they just throw a big spit called reality/truth on big money businesses out there. ♥
You folks need to make a movie with these kind of things.
Hahaha🤭😂🤣 Now when i see the Fizzy drinks im reaching for a Horton's Hard.
I like this, but when Roger said, "Is it the taste?" I half expected him to mutter, "Nope. That sure isn't it." Which, granted they do basically do that joke at the end but I was a little deflated lol.
omg these videos straight up make me realize our reality is a straight up dystopia.
I quit drinking three years ago. This is just another reason to stay on the wagon.
The depiction of hard seltzer in this parody video is so true. It's total poison and I'm speaking from experience.
Thanks Roger, your vocabulary is outstanding, also your insights. Carry on.
This was so refreshing. Roger than you for another banger! spot on!!
Was planning on buying a pack of White Claw tomorrow.
I mean, I'm still gonna do it, but Roger makes a lot of good points xD
I love these series! XD!
It feels like a SNL skit. I love it.
I love Please Don't Destroy.
"drink horton's hard" 😂 phrasing omg!
They actually legit sold me into this unintentionally xD Now I am craving one
I love those descriptions!
Rodger, you are, without a doubt, the most perfect personification of unregulated capitalism I have ever encountered. Not since W.C. Fields have the sticky butt cheeks of humanity been so accurately incarnated. My sincerest compliments!
Capitalism was not originally envisioned to operate void of moral foundations (profit through deception). Remove morality from the basis of capitalism, all you're left with is a bunch of greedy thugs willing to legislate who gets to take (legislated theft, which they call "regulation") all the wealth and distribute as they see fit (Socialism -> Communism). It's the stupidity of assuming an individual or group of individuals has the sole ability to determine how everyone else gets to use currency. Capitalism has been taught as "satan" in the last few decades by a bunch of America-hating university-infiltrating thugs who hate capitalism and promote Socialism as the moral high ground. It's no wonder over 60% of those under the age of 35 today don't understand how money functions. Everywhere in the world that Socialism took hold, everything went to crap. Capitalism, standing on moral grounds, is the only system on the planet that has ever lifted the masses out of abject poverty, disease, and destitution. It's the worst system in the world, except for every other system.
Wake up the capitalism is the regulation as the big corporations own the government. Selling a product doesn’t need regulation it just needs someone to buy it and regulation only helps the top wanting to eliminate competition from start ups.
@@briank5877 Free enterprise built upon moral, ethical practices. Not burdensome taxation, not production control by political interests, not market manipulation by a globalist currency reserve system, not fascism by the government and centralized corporations, not the worthless paper-backed illusionary economy.
i mean, bourbon cashew milk kinda does grab me, and i'm not sure i like what that says about me
Best type of alcohol mixed with the best tasting milk. Seems to me like it says you have good taste.
Honestly that would cut the sharpness down to a reasonable level yeah
Probably taste really good, but then make you heave and retch right after.... But that's no problem, they'll throw different versions at you, without your knowledge or consent (obviously)
@@Nothinglikeagoodnut nailed it!
I was just thinking "That sounds kind of good for some reason" ...not sure what that says about me, either