I changed my mind about having children

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  • เผยแพร่เมื่อ 1 ธ.ค. 2024

ความคิดเห็น • 16

  • @morganalexandria2524
    @morganalexandria2524 24 วันที่ผ่านมา

    I’m so glad I found this video ❤ I’m going through kinda the same I thought ever since I was 15 I would never want kids and always rejected the family concept but now going into my 30s I’m realizing what is important to me and I think I want kids now.. I wish more people would talk about this. One can feel lonely when this happens because people can shame you on both sides because you “changed your mind”

  • @rootsofaurora
    @rootsofaurora ปีที่แล้ว +3

    An interesting subject. :) I said all my life I would never want children. It wasn't until I was past the age of 30 that I changed my mind. For me it probably came down to being emotionally and mentally ready, and discovering new priorities at this age compared to when I was younger. When I was younger I always focused on what was going on right now, and rarely thought of how life would be when I'm 40, 50 and older. But when I really started to ponder what I want my future to look like, with my husband, I discovered that family life with a child actually was what I wished for. I'm with you that babies aren't the most interesting so to speak, and I'm more looking forward to seeing life through the lense of my child and not baby or toddler. :) It's fascinating how we transform and grow in life...

    • @IlvaIgnatovica
      @IlvaIgnatovica  ปีที่แล้ว +1

      I absolutely get what you mean. That’s why I think maturing is so, so important. Because then you do things because you are mentally and emotionally ready, not because of societal pressure. In that process you align with your values which can bring even more happiness and contentment.
      Thank you for sharing! 🤍

  • @dianaculictheartist
    @dianaculictheartist 11 หลายเดือนก่อน

    You literally spoke my mind. ❤ Thank you

  • @_maymie
    @_maymie ปีที่แล้ว +2

    Thank you for this video. Especially the part where you talked about how your decision to not have children was very influenced by the idea that it’s disempowering to women, and all the other negative ideas we hear about being a mother or having kids.
    I’ve always been on the fence about it because on one hand I love the idea of creating something beautiful. But there’s a lot of negative stuff about how being a mother is terrible on social media or how kids are terrible, how pregnancy can kill you, etc. It’s crazy how like you mentioned in the video, we have come to somehow believe that being a mother means sacrificing everything you love, your beauty and energy, all the things that we love about being women. It’s a very doomsday way of thinking.
    Of course I think all perspectives are important to put forward but some part of me always felt like the negative perspectives are way over-represented. Hopefully we can see more of a balance as time goes on

    • @IlvaIgnatovica
      @IlvaIgnatovica  ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Yes, the negative connotations about motherhood are very, very strong! But I hope the idea of “creating your life on your own terms” is as liberating for you as it is for me. Learning how to block the noise and do things the way it feels right to you can make everything so much easier!
      Thanks for writing this and thanks for watching! 🤍

  • @vilmamerio9103
    @vilmamerio9103 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    I think it is great that you are getting rid of labels and what people should or should not do. On the other hand I do not encourage to have a child as this thing that unites you and your partner. And I do not know what do you mean with when you think when you say you can have your family your way. In a way it is true, but all the families revolve around same tasks and routines still and you will not decide how your family looks, the baby does not care about the image.

    • @IlvaIgnatovica
      @IlvaIgnatovica  ปีที่แล้ว

      I agree with you, a child is never a reason to unite, however in a happy and loving relationship a child can only enrich that family! I think it’s a very beautiful process to create a new human life, as long as you’re ready emotionally and mentally.
      And of course you do it your own way. Just look around-family dynamics and relationships differ all around! You have the power to create your own routines, habits and adventures. Lastly, it’s not about image, it’s about being authentic to you :)

  • @Koko_Tan29
    @Koko_Tan29 ปีที่แล้ว +1

    Your eyes are goals✨btw loved this convo ❤️

  • @arlora
    @arlora ปีที่แล้ว

    Can relate to this a lot! Thanks Ilva! 👏💕

  • @Kaytlin_
    @Kaytlin_ ปีที่แล้ว

    I feel like it might be naive to say that you can still orchestrate how your life will look when you have a child. Ultimately I think the childs needs/wants will win over yours.

    • @IlvaIgnatovica
      @IlvaIgnatovica  ปีที่แล้ว +1

      There are things that won’t be in my control and there are things that will be, i will focus on things that i can control and affect :)

  • @antramartinsone6273
    @antramartinsone6273 ปีที่แล้ว

    Sorry,bet būs latviski.. :) Aizķērās tas par bērniem tādā vecumā,ar kuriem var sarunāties. Tu pat iedomāties nevari (es arī nevarēju,jo to nevar iedomāties, kamēr tas ir noticis), ko visu var piedzīvot no tā brīža,kad berniņš ir Tevī.. ❤ Nemēģināšu neko aprakstīt, novēlu piedzīvot to!

    • @IlvaIgnatovica
      @IlvaIgnatovica  ปีที่แล้ว +1

      Cik jauki, es varu un reizē nevaru iedomāties to!