SPECIFIC BOUNDARIES YOU NEED WITH FAMILY | divorce, disapproving parents, splitting holidays
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 6 ม.ค. 2021
- today is a big day for us! We are breaking ground on our property and could not be more excited! I guess you can say it's going to be a groundbreaking day... lol Anyways, Comment what you want our next series to be! We could do another one on Sex, or one on Finance, we have many many more ideas... we just need to sit down and plan it all out!
Honestly tori and I are working around the clock and it feels good to do so... even if we are exhausted. Our main goal right now is to get out in front of these videos so it's not all so last minute... But we are doing as much as we can and that is okay! That is something I would love to encourage y'all in right now is having grace for yourself. Taking a step back and realizing you're human and sometimes that can mean the human condition limits you from being who you want to be, and doing what you want to do... and guess what?1 THAT IS OKAY. IT'S OKAY. I need to hear that and you need to hear it as well. Life is so much more enjoyed when we let go of the control and embrace where we are. Sometimes the best answer to our prayers is not to get out of our current situation but to find PEACE inside of it. Don't just ask God to remove you from your hardships, but invite HIM into your hardships. The unconditional love and acceptance you will feel in those moments will shock you. it did both of us. It's one thing to be loved when you are "loveable". It's another thing to be loved when you are "unloveable" in the times when you think there is no way I am worthy of love right now. You may think to yourself... "just give me more time, I'm close to who I want to be..." But imagine not having to earn love. Imagine not needing to be enough. Imagine feeling freedom from what society tells you that you need to do and who you need to be.
I think I'm rambling at this point but we can't wait to get more videos to you all next week! Thanks for watching yall!
Love,
Chad & Tori
1. Our Patreon: / themastersfam
2. Our Instagrams:
Tori's- / torimasters
Chad's- / chadmasters
Podcast- / themessymasterpiecepod...
3. Daily Devotional Podcast: toriandchad.buzzsprout.com
4. Books and other things we recommend: www.amazon.com/shop/torimasters
5. Our website to get on email list for prayers and updates: www.toriandchad.com/
6. Our Mailbox:
Tori and Chad Masters
2161 E County Rd 540a
144
Lakeland, FL 33813
7. Podcast with the Boyz: linktr.ee/PromptUs
Love you,
Chad
Left some encouragement in the description if yall need it!
the podcast has been getting me through each day especially Tori's prayers❤️
Aww we love that! Love seeing everyone listen to the podcast!
@@ToriAndChad Your podcast is my fav!! I love how you two go into the bible as if a newbie is with you listening.
I would love to see two series, one about how to trust God when something bad happens to you and or like when you don't feel like he is close to you, and another one on sex and like how to have guardrails (Hope I said that right lol) but how to have that in place while dating so you don't mess up by giving into sin.
Hope you don't mind making those videos on those two things, Love you guys!
Aww thanks for saying that, Rebekah! And yes that sounds like a great idea!!! We love you!
I would also love a second part to this video
me too honestly. hahah
Sex, finances, a second part to this, anything for dating couples / pre marriage. Love you guys!
YES AND YES AND YES!
“Pray for my future significant other’s family”
That’s 1 thing I NEVER thought about!
Thanks guys!
SN: why does that scare me now lol.
As someone who has experienced abuse within family, you hit the nail on the head with the combination of resources and boundaries. I personally have a counselor that I see 1-2 times a week and I have very strict boundaries with this specific person. Setting boundaries specifically with an abuser is hard and I’ve had to work through significant guilt because of setting those boundaries but it is so worth it (reminder that guilt does not come from the Lord)! Like Chad said in the description, have grace for yourself and take all the time you need to process whatever it may be. Be in constant prayer for both yourself and specifically the other person and know that setting boundaries is so worth it. This video is so so good. A part two would be amazing😍
Thanks for being strong and sharing that, Eva... You are so strong and we know people will be encouraged by your journey and how you have worked through such hardships.
I'll be praying for you Eva
Tori's hair though 🤩
Yeah i love it! So happy she did that!
Tori you should do a video about planning a wedding and tips about having a wedding and saving money on stuff what’s worth the spending and what’s not worth spending your money on. And cool ideas to incorporate godly things into your wedding and what you guys did at your wedding.
Also you should talk about having forgiveness in a relationship having forgiveness for your significant other when they have done something wrong.
Chad is literally so wise. In every video that I’ve watched, he always says something that truly hits. Like I’m going to show you my philosophy before introducing you to my philosopher. Or people bearing the fruits of marriage before having the protection of marriage. Or loving her heart before her body. Like oms the things you quote truly touch me!
Awesome, a new video and I can't wait to watch! I saw some ideas in the comments from your last video that I'd like to see like a series on maintaining friendships with non-Christians and finance. And on the less serious side of things, some fun challenges like Chad narrating Tori's makeup and dubbing her voice, and also a cooking challenge
Aww wooo! Everyone wants the narrating Tori's makeup video haha It needs to be done. And yes to thevideo on maintaining friendships with non christians! Thank you a ton for the advice!
Yes PLEASEEEE on that series!!
Hahaha thinking about Tori talking with Chad's voice is already making me start to giggle
You should do a series on just marriage itself. Things you’ve learned so far for other newlyweds seeking to put the Lord first!
Yesss a finance one!! I've never seen a finance topic video😭
Well we need to do it then!!!
saw the thumbnail, heard *in a high-pitched voice* hi guys, welcome back to our channel
hahahahah we hear it too
I feel like nobody ever addresses this subject on dysfunction in families. And I needed this. Thanks ❤️
I felt what Tori said about divorced parents since my parents don't stay together either. Oh my god "im not the middleman" PREACH !!!!!
And what Chad said about giving grace, it's so hard to do that cause they are your parents and you expect them to be perfect for you but it's really something I had to walk through. There's this quote "We have a tendency to want the other person to be a finished product while we give ourselves the grace to evolve.”
And I just think it's so true and apt for everyone around us and specially here.
OH MY GOD LOVED THIS VIDEO.
I would love to watch more of this series and finances ❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️
Last time I was this early I was kicking my way out of the womb
HAHAHAHAHAHAH
😂😂😂😂😂
I died laughing hahah
That is establishing boundries with your parents at an extremely early age...... kicking your way out... wow.
This is so accurate. New boundaries towards parents, getting back to parents' house...
could y’all do an entire video about divorced parents? i relate 100% to everything you said! my parents have been divorced since I was 5 and I still feel like it’s chaos. the hardest thing is coming back home and trying to split time equally so they don’t get upset.
Yes, boundaries with the in-laws can be tricky but good boundaries are necessary! God bless
Congrats on your new property, also I'm loving this new upload schedule!
So proud of you two speaking into these hard questions! 💛
Always such a happy moment when I see you uploaded a new video! 💛 Love watching your videos and being encouraged by your widsom! Love you guys! Be blessed! 🤗
Longest video ever!!! Highly loving the length & content of it!
A big thank you to take time and talk about such stuff that's unarguably not spoken about as much as they need to...!
I believe recognising the need to set boundaries( in all kinds of relationships) is a yardstick of responsible behaviour. However, sometimes we all are waiting, against insurmountable odds for something extraordinary to happen to us. But when we steer the wheel of our inner locus of control, is when the actual magic show begins! :))
The commitment to so many offerings as you spoke about previously, can be exhaustive. The Masters fam shall be patient enough to tune in whenever you guys are ready.. 🙂
As for the next series, financial one sounds good. It's different and need-of-the-hour kind of topic! I can't wait for whatever it is that is in store ...
Congrats on the ground breaking day...its the beginning of something beautiful!
God bless you two always! ♥
Wow this is so good. Ive been waiting for this video for a long time and I can say that its worth the watch. All the questions asked were answered greatly and its good to see that some of the questions are very timely on the positions people are right now. Love how you guys have a wide range of experience to answer the issues and also love the description box. Love the video 🐢🐨
Didn't even start the video yet and the description already gave me the jolt of inspiration I needed to start my day!🥰 I really appreciate the hard work you two put in your videos. I'd like to see you continue the sex series. I guess you guys get A LOT of requests to do the video of Chad doing Tori's voiceover for makeup so that would be cool too😎 I guess a lot of people think it would be funny to see her talk with his dulcet tones coming out of her lips, I mean I think I would too🤣🤣
Aww yay! We honestly needed the inspo helo today too... and yes the make up video needs to happen! lol so many people want that
@@ToriAndChad I don't know who came up with it, but whoever came up with the makeup voiceover idea is a comic GENIUS, nothing would be funnier than seeing Chad trying to explain her makeup and his speaking voice dubbed over her lip sync!! That's how Liza Koshy did it with her bf but unfortunately it's not family friendly
Oh my goodness, yes to the voiceover/voice swap/lip sync idea 😂
I really needed this video!!! Need more of these boundaries in family pls😭❤️
Oh wow this video hit me! Hit my circumstances, hit friends I know and their circumstances...this was honestly just what I needed to hear in the new year.
Tori I LITERALLY can feel your heart through the screen and needing to not say the wrong thing. Ugh I love you guys❤️
I desperately needed to hear this...It really moved me and I will apply your advice in my life....thanks❤
Thank you for this series! It is so helpful. I love hearing both of your perspectives! It would be great to see a series on finances. Thank you! 😀
Such great advice as usual! I think it would be cool if you guys did a engagement series or even just a few videos that talk about the different things to prepare for like big topics to discuss with your significant other before you get engaged and after, planning for the wedding, preparing for the living situation for after the wedding, writing vows, signs you’re ready for an engagement, and the list goes on haha. A lot of people do videos about dating and marriage but I feel like there isn’t as much content out there for the engagement season of one’s relationship, so it would be cool to hear your guys advice on all of that :)
I am so excited for the new series you are planning to do this year! I Would love every kind of subjects you consider discussing, but I would especially enjoy a series on singleness or Marriage preparation! 💛 Looking forward to watching your next videos! 🙂
It is interesting how soft yet impactful your videos are . Always my go to cozy place . ❤
Such great advice on very real and hard questions!! Love these types of videos
I just love watching you guys and listening to your genuine & thoughtful advice!! I really REALLY appreciate how you both always take the time to talk about as many possible situations/relationships as possible. there aren't many videos that I see that I can relate to as much as yours because you guys are so intentional with your encouragements for ALL people in whatever situation! praise God for the amazing things He's doing through you both and for what is to come!!!
Great video.. “guard your heart go it is the wellspring of life” comes to mind in dealing w/abusive, controlling or manipulating family members... great word - love from afar!!!!
Thank you so much for putting so much work into your vids!! You guys are on fire!!!!
That is so sweet of you to say!! Thank you for that!
Yes agreed!!
Aww thanks Sweet Angela!
I’m so glad you’re making great progress on your property! Thank you so much for you encouraging words in the description. One of the things I struggle with the most is being okay with not being able to do all the things of the world and feeling like I’m not good enough because of it. These were words I really needed to hear and I’m so thankful. You guys are so amazing!
Aww thank you for taking the time to read that description! Happy it hit home for you!
Thanks for the great video guys!! And congrats on 'breaking ground'!! So happy the process is starting!
Honestly one of my favorite videos you have done
This is exactly what my hubby and I needed to hear!!
Thankyou for being such genuine, Godly people. Such a rare find on this channel. Blessed by your faith and your desire to share with us❤️
Just wanted to say THANK YOU. This channel is an oasis in a crazy world. I love, love, LOVE these videos and admire your dedication to Christ! ❤️
so thankful for this video! you all have helped me so much!!💜
Thank you guys for sharing with us, I can imagine how hard it was to talk about your situation.
thank you so much guys for putting in so much effort and dedication into what you do...the podcast, the videos and everything else going on in your personal lives! I love y’all and i thank God for guiding me to your channel ☺️🤍I’ve been subscribed for a couple of months now and honestly, God is so good. The growth on the channel and just seeing how many people are joining the family is amazing to see! And also, the descriptions are ALWAYS so encouraging 🥰ok, i’m saying too much...love y’all :)
Aww thanks a ton for saying that, Ariana! We love you and appreciate you sharing that because it is humbling for us to read and see what is happening with our growing online family! And thank you for reading the description!
I felt so blessed & encouraged watching your videos. I stumbled across your TH-cam channel when I was trying to look for inspirational Christian relationship vlogs.
Thank you and Blessings to you both.
Great video, can't wait for part 2!! Thank you!!!
I know this is a difficult topic to discuss. I'm proud of you for meeting it head on. Good job y'all and lots of love
I love the Isaiah verse and the wisdom you shared on that! Much love to you both!! I just stared watching you a few weeks ago and have never been addicted to anything until now. Lol ❤️
How to maintain a relationship with your parents while you’re still a teenager?
I appreciate you guys' effort for these videos and conversations, it's so valuable! Just a reminder to motivate you :)
Just got out of class and saw this video. So excited to watch it😃😀love both of you so much😊
WOOOO! WE hope that you like the video!!! Thanks a ton!
You two are so smart! Thanks for all the wisdom you two are sharing!!
Love you guys!!! You've truly helped me continue to grow my faith.
That is all we could ask to do!
Great work guys! I would love to see more on this. I would also like a video or series on finding community and deep friendships. I just moved across the country for work. I’m in a state I don’t know anyone in and would love to hear tips and trick. Love you guys ❤️
love you guys, thanks for wise advices. Happy new year . God blessssss
Just started watching this video and I just have to say, Tori your hair looks amazing! The color is soo beautiful!! Love it 😄
LOVE THIS SERIES!!!!
Thanks so much!! And Tori I love that sweater/jacket on you! So cute and cozy! My suggestion foe a video is missional dating I feel like so many people are for it because they see one couple that it worked for and base all their reasoning why it's ok on that.
Love u guys!
Can you do a separate video JUST for navigating life with divorced/separated parents? especially on setting boundaries but also being there for your parents/loving them/spending time with them? Also with holidays and split family stuff - all the things?
If you’re comfortable with that. I would SO appreciate that! Not in a particularly healthy place right now with that but idk how to remedy it.
Thank you for this! I specially needed it today❤️
Aww yay! Thank you for encouraging us by saying that!
I would love to hear both of your testimonies in the next video series 🙌🏽💕 I love hearing what amazing things God has done in people’s lives
such good encouragement!!! love yall
Best 2021 vlog ever🙌
These are all really GREAT and relevant topics!! Great answers guys
Love this! Finally got to watching it. I would love to see another part of this topic, and finances for sure.
Okay yay we are about to start our finance series so stay tuned for that!
I would love a finances series!!
Love you guys! and love the podcast
I would LOVE more on boundaries with parents! As a young adult trying to be independent but also still living at home currently. Would love to hear y'all's take on that! Much love to you both! Thank you for being such a Light and so encouraging :)
ah any advice would be helpful for me also- Matt
Great and excellent video you guys. God bless you!!! Keep it up 💗💗💗
Thanks again for the video and your honesty 🤗🙏
Looove this. Boundaries are hard, and with family I think harder, to set, to follow,...
And about the next series.... I don't know! I will think on some topics!
By the way, I forgot to say on the last video when I spoke about the podcast, when you launched it, I thought it was named The Messy Masterpieces because of your surname haha, like 2 messy pieces called Masters hahahahaha. Then when you explained on the podcast it has also sense (and more than my first idea hahaha).
Thanks for the video and for the boundaries series! I’m new here, and I’m not sure if you guys have a video on this already, but can you guys make an in-depth video about male-female friendships? How close is too close (physically, emotionally, spiritually, mentally)? Are opposite sex friendships bound to lead to romantic feelings? How can I maintain a godly, platonic friendship with the opposite sex? Do guys pursue close friendships only with girls they like?
I am so thankful for you guys...
Finance series! Also part 2 of this would be awesome!
Excited to watch this video and can’t wait to watch y’all speak some wisdom
We hope it encouraged you!!!
Wow ya’ll, I legit teared up at that message in the description! I would love it if you guys could make some videos for HS graduates like me, who don’t really know how to navigate their life and who are still learning the basics of so many things. And as I’m still living with my parents, I need some advice for living with them, because they are verbally abusive and honestly don’t show the love of Christ even as believers. Anyways love you guyyyys ♥️
So good y’all!!! 💗
Great advice 👌🏾
Def a part 2!
Maybe some videos about HOW to travel wisely! (Outside of these covid times)
Hi, I am happy to hear your house is coming along good. Love the description box. Love the podcast. Can you make this video into a series? I don't know if my letter ever got to you because I forgot to put a stamp on it. The envelope had a return address but it never came back.
Great video guys❤ Chad you always mention how you got saved when you were much older it would be really cool to get a story time of how you came about to give your life to Christ and Tori your hair😍😍
Hello Tori and Chad,
All the way from Australia.
I have watched you for awhile now, but this is the first time I have commented..lol Thank you for this video it came at the most perfect time...God inspired obviously..
I will continue to pray for you guys 🙏 God Bless
I didn't know I needed this video until now. Like wow❤️
Aww that means a ton, Twisha!!! Thank you!!!
Would love a video about finances!!! Loved this video btw💗
Love this video! God bless you to keep giving us wisdom. A small request, can Chad does his testimony video
who should you vent to if not your parents? not like just straight complaining, but when i have a conflict with someone i feel like i need to ask my mom what to do and how to handle it, because she’s been through more life than me and is wiser than me(i’m 16 btw, no bf just asking for the future). i feel like it’s really helpful to get her input on how to handle problems in having with people. i process things externally so it is a lot easier for me to work through things with someone, so who would you suggest that be?(other than God)
I'm currently having conflict with my dad because he is a narcissist and he has a lot of anger within him, so he projects that anger to me on the daily. He diminishes everything I do even though I try my best to honor him and love him, I have come to the conclusion that his problem cannot be fixed by me (I've tried for 7 years), it can only be changed by God.
He kicked me out of the house for something that didn't make sense but thank God I have a place where I can stay (my boyfriend's house because he is with his family in another country so I'm alone), but when the time comes I don't really know what to do. Should I keep looking for another place to stay? (I don't have the resources since I am a student) or should I come back and endure all of the things that make me feel bad? Because it causes me depression and anxiety.
I've been praying for a solution, but maybe I can do something...
Obviously God’s Fatherly love isn’t being shown by your father, which is sad, however you can show him mercy just as Christ has shown us mercy, please do prayerfully consider not moving back, Proverbs 22:24-25
“Don't befriend a hot-tempered man, and don't associate with one who harbors anger: lest you learn his ways, and ensnare your soul.”
it is hard to come to the humbling and truthful conclusion that he is narcissistic person, that’s the first step. Then praying for God to have mercy on him, and forgive him, the second, then pray for practical wisdom for yourself and how God wants to use you for Christ glory. From what I can tell it’s obvious that you should not move back in with him, seek and trust God for financial provision, and always remember to make purity the priority in your relationships! - Brother Matt.
I agree with the other comment here, well said! The only way to heal is to establish some distance and boundaries. Growing up with a narcissist will reveal you have many layers within to examine and heal that you would not even realize until you have that distance. Love him from a far, and pray for him. But do not set expectations for his behaviors or the future. Live one day at a time and focus on self love!! I can not say that enough, dealing with narcissistic abuse .... SELF LOVE, first!!! 💗
I think a detailed video on how seasons pass and what exactly we handle within seasons and PURITY!!! LOVE YOU GUYS
Great video!! Thank you so muchh❤️
Wooo ! Thank you for the love!
Hope you get to feeling better soon. Remember to take time for self care as well.
Respecting my parents is honestly my biggest spiritual issue right now, because I feel like I'm doing fine and then I go home and I fall back into toxic behaviors that I thought I grew out of (like being critical, negative, etc.). And then I have such a hard time honoring my parents bc my attitude is terrible! 😭
Tori's hair looks great 😍
Yesss, you should talk about finances and how you know your ready (financially) to get married, or how much money do you guys think it's smart to save before moving (idk) videos like that would be very interesting
You guyzz are outstanding 😍😘😘❤❤
Yayyyyy letsgo finish school & watch thisss
Hope school is good!!!
@@ToriAndChad aw thanks!:)
Love you guys!!!
We love you!!!
Guys my advice to you both glean all you can from your family. It will answer so many questions. Don't be afraid of such a task. The good news is it wasn't about the rejection. It was about how much I loved the girl in this video. She my next love song.
Really loved this one! I wouldn’t mind seeing a dating series.
Now this is an Interesting video to watch ! Looking forward to the wisdom y'all are gonna be sharing In this video. ☺️
Thanks a ton man! As always, we so appreciate your support!
@@ToriAndChad As always , I appreciate you guys talking on topics that need to be addressed .
We can't help it! lol