As a post op girl, I couldn’t agree more! Although transgender is a part of my history, it doesn’t describe me or who I’ve become since transitioning. ❤
People don't understand. Trans went through the physical process to fit how they feel. They did this for themselves, not for anyone else. This makes them happy. I say more power to them. After all, everyone goes through life looking for what makes them happy. For Trans, this is one of those. And it's perfectly fine to think you're no longer tran after op. This is part of that happiness. You're a beautiful woman. Even though you're not capable of getting pregnant, you're still a woman. Having said that, some women can't get pregnant, for whatever reason, because of their problems with the reproductive system. The bottom line is be happy who you are and what you have.
You should all watch The Danish Girl to guide you about transition!😊Maya is lucky to pass as a woman without FFS! Look out for Colleen at a Toronto Starbucks!
Maya, as an older transgender-transexual woman I so much agree with you. Some of us are simply binary and changed our gender and sex. I too don't identify with the non-binary trans community. Thank you for being such an eloquent spokeswomen for us transsexuals!😘
You bring up an excellent question which is, are trans people actually changing their gender? For myself I'm finally living as my true gender after many many years of pretending to be the gender that is usually associated with my physical body. That is my experience and I always assumed, possibly incorrectly, that my experience is shared by all trans people.
@@emilytrott Thank you so much for your comment. I miss spoke, I did not change my gender. I often tell people that the only thing that I changed was my physical body. I was always female.
No one can change their sex. Transgender women’s neovagina is not a vagina it’s an artificial cosmetic structure that’s not suppose to be there which is why it’s always attempting to close.
Maya, this is one of the best videos you’ve done. I relate to this almost one hundred percent. I’m trying to find my place in the world and community as a trans woman. Thank you for your insight and heart and care.
Your place is not in women's spaces. Get out and stay out of women's spaces. You have no idea the damage you do. You don't know because you don't care.
I completely respect your choice to use whatever term you wish. For the record, I've only been on HRT for a few months and call myself a transwoman. Even if I have surgeries, I think I will always refer to myself as transgender rather than transexual. The reason being is this: I think we, in 2023, are currently in the hey-day of gender transitioning. It is almost mainstream nowadays. But I feel that there will soon be a big(ger) push back from the current mood in society. We've had our two steps forward and now is the time for 1 step back. I think the trans community need to stay closely knit and support one another rather than splinter into seperate groups (transexual / transgender / whatever else). You are free to do you and seek your own happiness, but for the sake of staying strong as a community and showing support for others who have yet to embark on their journey, I'll remain transgender. Additionally (and about this I have no opinion), I think you are also opening yourself up to criticism of the anti-trans activists. Aren't they going to say that; it's one thing to identify as a woman (ie your gender), but you can't change your chromosones (ie your sex)?
Hooray for you Maya !! i transitioned m-f over 50 years ago, my problems since have been similar to most other women. i have little urge to identify with TG, yet i proudly acknowledge TS if i must be labelled.
You've got 15 years on my transition but it's interesting how the terms have changed over the years. Back in the 80's I never liked the term sex change or transsexual so I started using trans. Now I just use woman as trans has become too vague.
@@braaaplife557 You made the right choice because a "woman" is what we are, and there is no reason to have to explain to others other than in political discussions to differentiate between cis and trans people.
Be the person you want to be, but be sure that this is the life you want to adapt to. The idea of being transgender is a good step to make aslong as you have support of your friends that are understanding you should get through any problems that may be encountered.
Really, 50 yrs? Someone close to my age, that seems a rarity. I started 24 years ago, transitioning, and had vaginoplasty 16 years ago. I am definitely switched from one extreme to the other, of the binary, extreme. My mental health has been much improved. Enjoy
I have struggled awkwardly at times with saying to others I'm Transgender. But transsexual feels comfortable, and I'm elated knowing one more thinks like me . Happy holidays! ❤
I absolutely implore no one ever check out Buck Angel, Blaire White, or Marcus Dibs. They're truly awful people, and I don't relate to them or their toxic ideologies at all. They're every bit as harmful and uninformed as the people they criticize - especially Marcus, who I'm fairly certain is an angry f*g-h*g who medically transitioned to get a pass for being transphobic, which is the same thing I see a lot of newer "trans women" and "nonbinary" people as doing. Blaire occasionally makes decent points but then overshadows them with far right talking points, classism, transmedicalism, transphobia, racism, and wanton ignorance and historical illiteracy. Alexis Blake is a significantly better voice for quasi-conservative transsexuals. Though she, too, has some problematic blindspots, she at least avoids the self-righteous arrogance of White, Buck, and Dibs - all of whom would argue that Maya is a man with a mutilated penis, as opposed to the gorgeous, in tact woman she is.
Transgender is an umbrella term and emcompasses many different types of people. Each type has their own issues and challenges. It is totally fine to use terminology that more specifically defines who you are.
You are a classy and beautiful woman, period. I don't see you as anything else because you dont act like anything other than who you are at this point in your life. You respect yourself and are true to yourself. I think you deserve respect just for that alone. You are an inspiration, and you should be proud.
❤You are an inspiration to all of us(followers) Your narrative shows the depth of your beliefs and your positive honesty. Personally I am in awe of your bravery in confronting all the challenges.
Hi I’m not sure if how many of these comments you read but I just wanted to say as a grandfather and husband of 40 years I really don’t understand why any one would be horrible to you. As far as I’m concerned understanding and kindness is what we should expect from others unfortunately we don’t see that especially from the religious right and insecure. Good luck to you and I hope you have a happy and long life.
Maya, I am a woman first and my transition was due to an error at my birth. I also am a Trans Woman and will always support my community. Personal relationships require disclosure, IMO. Be comfortable with your labels, and someday we can stop and be people.
My wife stopped using any term to identify herself except female/woman. She was trans but after her final surgery she considers herself female, as do everyone else. It isn't an issue in her life
To be honest, I am tired of all these labels generated by society....it seems to be causing too much division and hatred. I say just be ourselves, whatever that is!! NO more labels! Love your channel!
@@alicelund147 they invented cis. you are just a woman. otherwise these clowns would be trans-cis.....see how fucking ridiculous it is. dont let them control you. they dont care about you.
I disagree with the continued "Ideology" language. That is the talking point of the right. Reclaim and use the term transexual. Its a matter of squares and rectangles. Transexual is a subset but will forever be part of the larger community. I have had HRT and surgery. There are things that we exclusively experience but we are not so different than someone else in the community that has for example socially but not medically transitioned. The community is not a monolith but we can't play us vs them in today's environment.
I'm not trying to divide anyone. I'm just quietly stepping out of a noisy room brimming with loud voices of every kind, a cacophony reverberating off of every surface, filling every millisecond of silence. I'm entering a quieter more relatable lounge down the hall where I can sip a cosmo and cackle with the dolls over our shared experience of transexual womanhood. There's enough people stuffed into the former room for no one to notice my departure. It doesn't mean I won't poke my head back in once and a while, but I've found a much more accessible, and calm venue to inhabit for the foreseeable future.
@Mayavhenry And that is great for you. No issues there. Maybe it wasn't intentional, though the language felt "othering" particularly referring to non-binary with reference to Ideology and the term lacking meaning. For us binary individuals it doesn't mean much just as trans(whatever root word) means little to cis folks, but for those that it is their only feeling of alignment it is everything. By all means I'm not meaning to come at you as I've followed your journey for 6 years. I'm only am addressing perhaps the delivery.
@@Krysten_now honestly though you are one of the reasons why I am many of others thaat are aactually trans and don't go under the umbrella of t he fake guise of being nonbinary, it was called something else before everyone made a big deal and its called being androgynous. How about you stop being so emotional and such a snowflake. Maya can literally say whatever she wants how she wants and she doesnt need you telling her how she should say it because it doesnt align with your slow way of thinking. Nonbinary doesnt make you transgender at all -- actual transsexuals really get the shit end of the stick because we have blue hair, scream fest of girls trying to be different.
Maya, I love these videos where just sit down and tell us your thoughts. I have watched you grow into the person you are now. Always speaking with intelligence and honesty. Keep it up ! You are a beautiful person.
@@Mayavhenry Like I said, your honesty and intelligence is outstanding. From someone looking from the outside in, you have given me great insight. I only wish there was a way to communicate privately. Anyway, keep it up, you are a voice that should be heard and listened to.
I got draaaaagggged for defending terms like transexual, transvestite…heck even just saying you’re a women (post op). I UNDERSTAND because I’m not trans. But I call women like you “woman” and don’t apologize for it. Great video.
You do you Maya! Even though I technically fit under the term transsexual, having undergone medical transition, I dislike using it for myself because I feel it perpetuates the common misconception that being trans has anything to do with sexuality. That being said, I’m a huge advocate for everyone to use the terms they find most empowering for themselves, and think that no one should have a say in what labels others use for themselves. It’s definitely important that we as a community can discuss these things without immediately being at each other’s throats, and because of that, thank you for making this video! It's honestly quite refreshing to see a person assert their identity without putting other people down.
Yes I also wondered why people think it has anything to do with sexuality, especially when I've seen some detransitioners saying they've been basically raped by hormonal transition, and I'm like whaa? like how? Some people even think that a child transitioning is a sex crime, lol, that one had me laughing on the floor. To me it is as much a change of physical body as anything else. But personally I prefer transsexual because it acknowledges that everything about human beings is driven by sexual energy oscillating between masculine and feminine, so it makes sense to me to call it trans-sexual, as we're alrering sexual dynamics and characteristics of the body, not sex per se, the problem is that a lot of bigots dont understand this important nuance, that our entire body is bascially sexed, and it has nothing to do with sexuality of the person, but sexed body as a whole.
@@Shalanaya Go do a search. For all the things you are convinced are not happening. There are so many videos where this is all about sex in public places and you are acting like those trans people do not exist. Your community is large and diverse, and the rest of us are actually looking at the whole picture not just listening to YOU pander your ridiculous delusions.
to be fair, when you medically transition you're changing your sex characteristics, so transsexual is actually a more accurate description of someone who takes HRT and undergoes surgery
In your case, in my opinion you could drop the "trans" & just identify as "young woman" ! I realize from a technical DNA related aspect you would disclose it to a significant other, but your beauty, mannerisms, speech, & attitude shout female! I'm a 75 y o very hertrosexual male, that knows a woman when I see one! I'd have no trouble pursuing you in my younger days! I'm fiercely independent & never influenced by thinking of the masses. I've seen men with feminine traits, & even had schoolmates that suffered from what was called in the 1950's "morphidites", (born with undefined genitalia) No shame was assigned to them & they only needed to chose which gender they identified with, have the surgery & all was well! I've had several life or death medical procedures done, so how is a surgery to clear up a life threatening disphoria in many cases, wrong? No stigma was attached in a religious sense by the devout of the time, such was a decision left to the Creator. Modern times seem to digitalize, classify, & micromanage aspects of the human experiance. I've my own relationship with the creator. I know what I have to do! Each needs to figure that out for themselves. Few in the masses agree with me, but they don't pay my bills, or guarantee my salvation. Of course only "cis" women car bear children, but then many for whatever reason can't, due to some problem. My first wife was one, & I never was a father. But that 's okay. I'm sad for her, but we play the hand we're dealt. God at times can be a tough hombre, & he expects us to count what blessings we have, & "suck it up buttercup"! Your blessed to live your life as you see fit! I'm proud of you, carry on!
maya, i think it's great that you have found your own identity and expressed it with us. it's great to have kept with you over the years, watching your videos, and seeing you transition into the mature woman you are now. i wish i could be where you are right now. unfortunately, i wasn't given the opportunity to transition, and i have been silently suffering in my dysphoria, only opening up very slowly, so some people that are close to me. i'm honestly kind of losing hope, i don't think i will ever be in the situation you are in. also, while i respect your decision, do keep in mind that you probably wouldn't be able to distance yourself from "transgender" if you didn't pass as well as you do. it's definitely a great privilege to have, and it's the result of your long and arduous journey, but do keep in mind that a lot of people who identify as binary transgender aren't necessarily different than you. that's all, i'm very proud of you, and i will keep following you because you are an awesome human being ❤❤❤
I think her point is not only about passing as a woman or have undergone surgery; but that she identify as a woman that express and present herself as a woman, that follow "traditional" gender roles, is attracted to men and have relations with men et cetera. But i might have misunderstood it because it is quite complicated with all these terms.
also theres some trans women who after transitioning go full terf mode and bury their transness and hide it even from themselves, which is not the best place to be. i'm sure maya won't be like that, but it's important to be humble and know where you come from.@@alicelund147
"More questions than answers" is something I can relate to Tbh at this point I kinda feel like the whole concept of gender isnt helpful. Not when ur talking about about individuals at least. All it does is iron out all the little things that make each of us special and unique. And makes the world a grey and boring place instead of a beautiful rainbow ❤
I transitioned 50 years ago as a Transsexual Female. I went into the world as female, not Transgender. I changed my sex as in organs to fit my gender which was female. The public’s acceptance of us was due to us living under the radar and not causing trouble. 50 years later I’m happy and content with who I am.
I had a friend in Idaho in the 90s who was just like you. We all loved him, I never once saw him bullied for who he was. But he never ever not even once tried to force anything on anyone he was just a wonderful person, before and after transition.
That is the way I have always understood it. My mom let me watch an interview with Christine Jorgensen. I was only 7 years old. Yes, liberal parenting. I understood what was being said. When I saw a picture of “George”, for me he didn’t exist. I’m watching a lovely woman named Christine. She’s always been Christine. Now she’s had the surgeries and everything else she needed to do so that now we “see” the physical Christine. Outside now matches who she’s always been. Courageous lady.
Maya, there you go again, flashing that sexy brain of yours. It's always refreshing to hear your clear headed and logical thoughts. Listening to you over the years has done a lot to set my mind straight about transsexual and transgendered people.
Hey Maya, I think it's super neat that you're changing how you identify in line with what works better for you. Personally, I think the more labels we are collectively okay with people using, the better! Though, I will say I think it misses the mark a little when you say non-binary has more to do with politics or political alignment than it does with peoples identity. That feels more like something that's been forced onto people by prejudice than anything that someone would choose for themselves.
Girl, our transitional timeline is so similar. It is insane. I totally know where you are and how you're feeling right now. And you couldn't be more correct. The umbrella term of transgender is so much that I don't understand it. So how can I expect anyone outside of the community? Understand it. Separating myself from the term and just using transsexual is much better, more direct, and it just makes more sense. Overall. Overall. Kudos to you for putting that out there
All I can say is from my experience. When I had my operation. I dropped any term with transgender transvestite or transexual. Whatever and I was strictly female and female only. I haven't regretted that decision since. I am a female to everybody. I know everything so I would highly suggest that dropping transgenderism. And whatever else that you want to call it and just say that you are female
I'm really happy for you for reaching a point in your transition where you pass and can live fully as a woman. Many will never reach that place, and I'm glad you have found a label that fits who you feel you are now. Maybe I just don't travel in the same circles as you do, but I've never encountered anyone who was non-binary for "political reasons." Some people are enbys because we will never pass. Some are enbys because we don't want to pass. But please, don't dismiss any of us as an "ideology." That's what the straights have been trying to do to _all of us_ by calling it "transgenderism." It's what the "LGB drop the T" crowd have been trying to do to _all of us._ I understand the allure of respectability politics, but it's not worth it. We're all in this together.
I don't relate to the NB experience. Why is that so hard to grasp? I want to exist in a space where I can relate to other transexual women who have medically transitioned. I don't care if you're an 80 year-old ex-linebacker who wishes they would have transitioned. If you haven't done so, you don't know what it's like, and you can't speak on the experience. Of course, I am advocating over and over for peace and love for all gender experiences in this video. I'm not being political. I genuinely don't align with every viewpoint in the Transgender community these days. Why would I pretend otherwise? "We're all in this together" -- I certainly don't align my thoughts with someone simply because they identify within the transgender community. We all have differing views and experiences that go so far beyond gender. Can we unite against bigotry against the trans and LGBT community at large? Of course! We MUST. But that doesn't mean I'm going to agree with every nuance or every transgender person's perception of bigotry.
Nonbinary for political reasons exist allover washington state. I just quit a job I loved because they took over the place and are allowed to do whatever the eff they want just because they ID as nonbinary. They even bring in fecal matter from their pets to eat in their lunch box they are that freaking gross.
Maya - it is refreshing and impressive to see you take ownership of who you are; and clearly that is a woman and womanhood! You have walked the walk & taken the profound actions to align your life/body, with your heart & mind. Transexual def fits better than transgender… ❤
When I saw the title, the term 'transsexual' came to mind, however thought you might think it was too specific to use. So, yes, good for you in making this distinction. :)
I love your attitude of "you do you" and accept others. We are not a monolith and there are different experiences out there. If people get angry it is their own insecurity talking
I am old enough to remember when the world completely dismissed Transgender identity, so it is unsurprising to me that the world is pushing back on other gender identities. This doesn't make it right, it simply explains that there is a process here. You are young enough and lucky enough to be an adult at a time when broad segments of our society understand and at least somewhat accept Transgender identity. Had you been born at the time I was, you would have a very different opinion on the need to tell people who you are and to fight for space within society. I ID as an Androgyne, under the Non-binary identity. I am sad this term doesn't make sense to you. But I also remember how the gay community dismissed Transgender identity, so even our own LGBTQIA+ community has a history of marginalizing some of our own people. It is something important to understand and remember. I live my life without having to tell people in my life who I am or about my identity. I am lucky, I live around very forward thinking people who have been fighters in the cause for Queer rights for many decades. But I do need to make space to be who I am in the work place, in general society. In exactly the same way my generation's Trans community had to fight for their space. We don't "push" our identity on people, we claim the right to exist, we claim inclusion and equitable protection under the law, also just like Trans people. Gender identities off the binary have existed for as long as recorded history in cultures all around the world. This is also an undeniable fact. While they used other cultural and local terms for these gender identities, the are well documented and an undeniable part of the human experience. Non-binary is a term that is younger than I am, but it was a welcome new term to broadly explain 3rd and other gender identities with a shared language and understanding. I encourage you to look beyond your own generation, experience and perspective to learn the history of non-binary genders and to make the effort to see the Trans community, and yourself, through the history of Trans fights for rights and inclusion and see that the exact same struggle is now being waged by Non-binary people for the opportunity to live freely and inclusively, without the need to fight for space. Until that happens, we have no choice but to raise our voices to educate others, to claim space in society and to assure equality. Again, just like Trans people have done for the past several decades. I am an advocate because this is the time to advocate. My identity doesn't define who I am, it is just one aspect of who I am. I am a technical manager, an American expat, a musician, an organizer, a friend, a writer, and so much more. But I don't need to fight for space as any of these things. I do need to fight for space and inclusion to dress as I wish to and to be protected from discrimination, unlawful exclusion, denial of medical care and consequences to protect me from violence. That is why I advocate and that is why my identity is sometimes at the forefront of my interaction with the world.
Very well articulated, and I also wholeheartedly agree with what you say. I wish people in the LGBTQIA+ community would accept and protect their own kin. It's so sad to have to prove to the world you exist and valid. She says you have to look how you want people to treat you. I'm really curious, what does she thinks being non-binary looks like? Also would she use them/them pronouns automatically if someone "looked" androgynous enough? What if she hears the person's voice and it sounds more fem or masc, would she uses their AGAB pronouns then? Or if someone has done HRT to be more androgynous and got top surgery, would she use "he/him" pronouns because the other person doesn't have boobs, so duuuh they have to be a man? That doesn't make any sense to me. It's border line transphobic, because YES non-binary people ARE trans people. My spouse discovered they were non-binary at 35yo, they are NOT doing it for attention, politic or ideology reasons and it's wrong to assume they are. They want to live as they are, their true self and what feels right for them, just like any trans person, like Maya is. It's unfair to say this kind of stuff just because you don't understand a concept. Read stuff, talk to people and ask around, don't be transphobic like that with your own people...
I agree with this 100%! I haven't undergone surgery YET but I relate to this all the way. For girls or guys who have are will undergo surgery, the term "TRANSGENDER" is just the 1st stepping stone towards becoming who you truly identify as...yes we are still transgender but transexual is like...the final goal of who we ARE! if that makes ANY sense lol I can be terrible at trying to explain things lol but yeh I agree with Maya! 💜
Yes "that makes any sense," because the journey from one extreme of the binary to the other extreme takes one through the Transgender Umbrella phase to finally get there.
i decided to not transition for several reasons, mostly medical reasons, but there were also other reasons and one of the bigger ones was exactly what you have said in this video. i am hundred percent sure my brains is convinced i am a man, and consequently i feel huge amounts of dysphoria. i am also not certain transition is necessarily the cure, it might as well not help at all. maybe in future we will find something else, and maybe i will just feel too bad and will transition. who knows. however, politics and everything that is happening around this movement is definitely pushing me away very strongly and probably not making my life better.
Exactly 💯 We do need to distinguish ourselves from the transgender political movement. Our narratives are used as support for the larger community when our lived experience is not about identity or political but about Being.
Here, here; sign me on. One extreme to the other extreme, that is Trans-Sexual Or, pseudo-woman, pseudo-mam =Transsexual. Just live and experience the fullness that is this God given life. Just fit in, love, and be; be a respectful, productive and supportive member of the society we are a part of; get to know your neighbors. Hmmm, musings. Enjoy
Exactly, we are individuals! We don't need labels. Once you start labeling people and putting them into different groups, hatred is usually right behind it.
As a post op, I too don’t relate to the term transgender but use transsexual if it ever needs to be discussed. I live my life as other women without parades and flags.
Very interesting to hear your thoughts! This video popped up on my recommended, so I haven't seen your videos before, but this one is certainly thought provoking. As a nonbinary/queer person myself, I'm at a transitional point in my journey where I'm moving away from most labels and mostly identifying as just queer, and I've been thinking a lot about how labels can evolve and change with us as we grow. I'm glad that you've found a label that works better for you!
💯 agree. Thank you for speaking on this. I also don't use the term transgender and it has been difficult to say the least with having to navigate the guantlet of misconceptions and negatively that has invaded our space and lives, politicisation notwithstanding. Love you, Maya 😌🫶🦋🩷
@13:31 Thank you! Very well said. You're the first person I've heard transcend the ideology and be able to navigate a truly philosophical space. Sincerely, I hope more people get to hear this, because it's profound.
I called myself transsexual after bottom surgery 15 years ago. Recently though I feel that I am not allowed to say this as it's exclusionary. They make me feel bad about myself when I shouldn't, I love and respect everyone and would never try to make them feel bad. I am so glad people are standing up and reclaiming the word because it is so much more precise and describes us much better with less explanation. I am still a transgender woman but also more precisely a transsexual woman. Thanks Maya for making this video and explaining it so well. Some women are given womanhood on a plate but we have earned it.
That's the crazy part about it. Calling ourselves transsexuals is look down upon by others in the LGBT community or by a lot of activists. Just because it is exclusionary like you said. But at the end of the day it is exclusionary so we deserve that right. There is a clear life and lived experience to be had after undergoing such a transition.
love this for you maya! congratulations. my humble opinion as someone not in the trans community, when i hear transexual it bears more weight and seriousness, in a good way. i love it. go girl xoxox
Maya, I absolutely understand your points. You are such a great example of a confident person who is not afraid to live their life the way they want while still being respectful of other people's choices. One of the reasons why I have been following you for a while and will continue to support you. Much love.
I also don't tell people I'm transgender, I haven't said the term to describe myself since like 2017 or 18 I think. I call myself a transgirl or transwoman. I've felt for a long time that the trans umbrella taking on literally everything has made it so confusing for people and when I hear people use the term, people start walking on eggshells because they're straight up scared of offending people. When I say I'm a trans girl I never have problems. It tells them exactly what they want/need to know, there's no follow up questions or awkward avoidance of conversation. I completely identify with the trans community, but I 100% agree, a lot of the things said in the community are super gatekeepy. It really feels if you are a "cis-passing" person then you get treated as if you're not really trans, or if you want to conform to certain gender roles then you're not *really* trans. Which is so messed up. It can sometimes feel like we're getting pushed out of our own community honestly, because we care about or do things things that somehow perpetuate transphobia or something like that. What I try to remember is that these people aren't real, that's just how certain people act on the Internet and if I met them in real life they'd likely be normal or someone I wouldn't want to hear the opinion of anyway. I just had to erase so much because I'm rambling. Thanks for making this video. Anybody who thinks you're somehow disrespecting other trans people this way need to take a break from being online.
I love you as you inspired me to find myself. I got so lost I almost successfully killed myself. I've now identified myself as Jessica and looking more like my inner self (still developing) with makeup and hair extensions but I do use transgender-non-binary as I listened to your video about being careful especially being assaulted for who I am in my community so I am comfortable in being fluid for my safety even though I am female on the inside. I'm 38 and I have felt depressed and stuck since I was 6 years old and you have inspired and helped me for years. It is especially difficult with severe epilepsy. But I can be as close outside as inside. So lots of love and thank you for everything for me being open you have saved me and helped me genuinely and honesty ❤
I completely agree with this and your previous video, esp about the part about getting our surgeries and just being ourselves, and seeing ourselves more as woman and their experiences rather than the whole transgender ideology
Wow, you are a very wise woman! Thank you for sharing your toughts and perspectives. I have to agree with this video. Please be strong and I wish you all the best, cheers
There's nothing inherently wrong or negative with the political aspect of "the transgender movement" or "the non-binary community"; there's always going to be disagreements and infighting but also strength, solidarity and pride in just about every major collective. Personally, I will never turn my back on the transgender and non-binary communities, even if I may no longer identify with those labels personally. They were there for me in my darkest moments, supporting me every step of the way, even through all the disagreements and drama; the least I can do is choose to continue to support them unwaveringly and continue to give back to the community when I can as I have done throughout my journey. Turning my back on the very community which was the foundation I built myself on for me just drips with elitism, exclusivity, gatekeeping and privilege. Assigned male at birth, did I want to be female - or at least just being seen as being female - a woman and only a woman? Absolutely. But having achieved that in any capacity doesn't mean I'm going to use the privilege of being female, being seen as female or "cis" (as those vocal "cis" women too painfully often do, as we all know) to complain, to say "Hey, I'm not one of you anymore, alright!?" (Because I've been there, with them, every step of the way - I know what it feels like and I should never forget because I'm in a better place) and talk down on the trans community for "not representing me and every aspect of my experience personally" when my sisters and brothers are being abused constantly, discriminated against for not fitting in with what society expects us to be, beaten, robbed, raped, killed, in backwater countries that have a long way to go or in developed nations. No amount of privilege, affirmation, self-contentment and euphoria that comes from being a woman, being seen as "cis" or being seen as woman, or that comes from being medically affirmed can ever make me walk away and turn my back on my sisters and brothers and non-binary folks who are struggling every day, just because I don't like or want anything to do with the "politics" or because I don't agree with everyone in my community or that simply I don't identify with the labels that are used to describe my experience. I can live my life fully, how I want but I can do at least one of at least two things - enjoy my privilege that comes with being finally seen and accepted as a woman, or look back on not only where I came from and how far I've come (with the help of the community no less) and give back, turn around with a smile and hold out a hand for those even a little less fortunate than myself. Because otherwise, I'll be turning my back on all of that collective suffering of real lives (regardless of any politics whatsoever) and live with blood on my hands. The more we are seen, the more we help each other and stand proud and visible together where and when we can, the better it is for us all in the long run, whether transgender or non-binary or transsexual or just being you. There's enough hate and division out there as is for us not to all stick together, help each other and advocate for each other even as little as we can. Aside from having a particularly traumatic detransition, there's not much reason for anyone who was in any niche corner or any part of our wider community to turn their backs on, and in practical effect become part of, or like our oppressors, to go to being no better than those who can never understand our collective experience. But that's just me and my two cents. Like everyone else.
I loved this video, thank you! I am a straight cis male who wants to better understand the trans community and I've always appreciated what you've shared on this channel. What you said in this video makes 100% sense and I absolutely agree with not wanting to be pushed into a label/category, for example, describing myself as "straight cis male" is really a simplification so other people have a general idea of my identity, but my gender identity and sexual orientation are not completely limited to that label. Also, you are the first person that I've heard distinguish between the political element vs the personal journey of trans identity, so you've given words to something that I've been trying to better understand as well.
So many great comments and there is so much associated with being trans* and what that means. No one will have the same experience and it's important that everyone just recognize that fact. So what it is to be trans is soooo broad these days. It would be great to see you on a national 'talk' show to share your wisdom. I wish I could make that happen. You're really going to rock it when you get older (more great perspectives to come) and I hope you're still sharing your experiences then but then again, maybe it just won't be a thing then.... Hugs and Happy Holidays to you and your family.
Ignore the bullies and trolls. Some push transition or push people to "experimenting" with 100 gender possibilities or something, 5:18 i agree its turned into some big confusion. The whole gender revolution thing, there's too much anger (IMO). I love staying out of the way of The Group (I'm independent transitioning) because I'm shy anyhow. 7:55 there is a LOT of relatability here. Thanks for your video.
In my opinion, if that part time crossdresser sees herself as a woman, and not just as a man who enjoys wearing women's clothing, then she is no different than you, me, or any other trans woman, or for that matter trans man.
@@emilytrott I agree with you, but in this case they did identify as a man and saw it as a fetish, which is where I took issue with them saying we were exactly the same.
Ooooh I was waiting for this video. I've seen the subtle nods to this in your videos but you've finally come out and said it 👏. As someone that's basically been labeled the Calgarian Blaire White, I get it. All you're doing is respecting the gender binary, and there's nothing wrong with that. It's simple - We want everyone to be happy, we respect that. We had surgeries and did what we did to help with our dysphoria - this is what it means to be transsexual. Now we live our lives and move on. I'm happy you finally posted this, respect girl 🙌
Lots of great comments in support of this very special video. You have hit on such an important topic around transgender and discussed it in a very delicate and sensible way. I identify very much with the struggles of transitioning and post transition wanting to just live in my ‘aligned’ body as much of a ‘woman’ as anyone else. Thanks for sharing and to all the other positive comments here.
You are so beautifully articulate! You could not have explained it any more clearly. You have changed your primary and secondary sexual characteristics as much as it is medically possible. "Transexual" is absolutely the correct term , nothing wrong with that!
I think probably ultimately as people experiencing extreme marginalisation and discrimination that we should look to the commonalities that bring us together rather than trying to divide ourselves off into smaller groups. The things I have in common with my close trans masc non-binary friend and the support and solidarity we can offer one another is vast just as it is in a different way with the queer cis women in my life.
You know, I could look at you and see you as a north American white girl with a very different cultural expression of femininity and say we’re different and reject commonality and solidarity with you despite us sharing in trans womenhood and other experiences. I just think that would only be a loss and not a gain.
I definitely agree in unifying over our commonalities against forces which seek to destroy us, but also want to acknowledge our difference in experience as it can greatly impact the perception of our queer identities. In certain trans spaces, for instance ones that focus solely on the non-binary & non-medical aspects, a transexual (like myself) can feel so removed from those conversations that ignore the major medical aspects of our journey as a necessity (for transexuals like myself). Which can feel isolating in and of itself. Bonding with others who have gone through similar surgeries has been instrumental, and I'll never have that level of understanding with the enby's and the anti-medical transitioners.
@@MayavhenryI understand that and understand wanting to seek out community there but I don’t understand the need to separate yourself off from the rest of the community to achieve that and I don’t really understand trying to rehabilitate a term that has been wielded against members of the community across the spectrum at various times. It feels kind of like edginess for the sake of edginess. I think like being in public and trying to discuss those unique experiences of being a trans woman and going through physical transition is so hard and uncomfortable with people who haven’t had that and don’t identify with that but I don’t think that’s because of non-binary people existing.
I also think different aspects of being trans and different challenges can be important at different times. I’ve found connections with different kinds of trans and queer people really significant and good at different times. I just think it’s leading with empathy and care. And also it’s about not depriving someone who maybe does identify as non-binary today of your experience and perspective which might help them to understand their needs and access medical transition or not you know?
It did make sense, thank you Maya. You lost me a bit in the middle, because your life experience is so different from my own, but that's why I watch. I am relieved you have returned to these shorter more on-point style of videos. I feel you covered important issues here. I tried to watch your live streams but I am too old to watch a girl putting her make up on an hour and a half. Glad to see you are not just surviving but thriving.
Hello again. I like that you think of yourself as Transsexual. I do too. However, there are others that just don't take action on their anxiety and frustration do to gender dysphoria and would prefer to live without a gender. The umbrella term of transgender is valid in my opinion. There are bad people who want to aforbid people from finding internal peace and happiness. Having a trans community is a safe space and fights these unAmerican laws. I would like to finish with. In your last video about Thailand, I was concerned about being available with guys that could easily take advantage. I think you have to find your way and no one should prevent you except your mom from enjoying life. You are beautiful go for it.
never even thought about myself as a transsexual. especially because in dutch its even more loaded then in english. but now i am considering to start using it aswel for myself. after your vid it makes much more sense in my situation aswel. thank you
I am also post-op and like you have reclaimed the term "transsexual" to describe myself. I cannot understand someone who has no bodily or gender dysphoria and no intention of doing anything to transition, other than claiming to be transgender. The transgender community has become so intensely political that, as a result, I no longer attend meetings of the local transgender organization as I feel alienated from it.
If male and female behavior was not so culturally polarized it would be so much easier to have the fluidity of male and female sexuality. All children feel out who and what they are sexually by experimenting with their peers( not, I repeat not adults or much older teenagers). It is through the experimentation without adult judgement and interference does sexuality begin to emerge. When this sexuality is constrained by masculine and feminine constructs, confusion starts to happen. These constructs are so devisive. One has to be male or female and act accordingly. Geez, this is where social acceptence becomes problematic. I feel for men and women who are born discontented with their bodies. I really wish there was a way they could be who they see themselves as without cutting their bodies up and be judged and mocked by a polarized society. Western society is pruient and puritainical at the same time. The result is really, really sad. Homophobic men who are obcessed with anal sex with women and women who wax their pubes to look like little girls but demand respect as women. God/Goddess, help us sort this mess out. And, Ms. Maya thank you for your thought provoking messages. This is my first time watching you and as a 70 yr. old sort of hetero woman, I am so impressed😊 by your grace.
I use transsex for much the same reason. Transsexual just give me sexuality vibes (homosexual, heterosexual, bisexual) and my gender is not a sexuality (I have a sexuality as well). So, I merged it with intersex to get transsex. Because in my opinion it is much more like I am intersex to the maximum (the point at which it is simply all wrong, as opposed to partially wrong). Also, to avoid the pornography history of the term.
You are walking a difficult path. First you transition and then there are people who agree and people think it is weird. It is an extra hard spot to be at. It really doesn't matter what others might think. In the end it comes down to how you feel about yourself. Maya seems like a wise person in a confusing situation. It is not easy. All we can do is try to be the person we want to be. Forget what others might think of you.
I feel like the term transsexual puts the place in your transition in focus and lable people as post op, which I feel like is a personal thing where you are and what you have done for your own happiness. Maybe it has something to do with being asexual. I don't know about others, but sort of taking focus to if you have physically transitioned people might have ideas about sexuality and again adding sexual to something does tend to add a sexual feel to it. I'm like. Does it matter where in transition I am? Can't we just cuddle?
That being said I have no problems understanding you using the label for yourself, but that's part of why it doesn't really work for me and I can't shake the feel of it would put a sexuality label when I prefer romantic labels
I respect you sososo much Maya and I'm glad to know you are confident in yourself today and know what you want to label yourself as. For me personally though I think it's more the opposite. I think transgender makes more sense honestly than transsexual. If we go with the notion that sex ≠ gender than it's important for ME to express that being trans to mean is connected to that. With the fact that I have always been female, but I wasn't always a woman or a girl. Being trans among such a diverse community and an array of perspectives is so fascinating and it's always intrigued me how many different stories you can hear from 2 different trans girls let alone the millions of us their are around the world. I'm sure things will only get better for the more that we are open and honest about who we are exactly (the same with everyone really!!)
Thank you for making this! You've for the most part been healthily addressing these things. Its true that certain parts of the population who may be resentful or spiteful have politicized those who are trans, when for the most part trans people would transition within a binary. Not to say one cannot be genderfluid, but it is an unfair "speaking for" a group that should not be spoken for, by those who are cis or genderfluid.
I've been saying the same thing ever since the term transgender started to be a thing... Got called transphobic by my local Trans Community, and that was what made me wanting to part ways with my own community! At this point, nothing makes sense we use words to define things, and if something means everything it will inherently also mean nothing at the same time! I always said having issues with your genitals and not being able to function as a human being because of it is such a different experience from someone who spiritually believes they should transition. Everyone can do whatever they want with their lives, but don't depreciate me for having my own opinion... I NEVER thought I would say this, but it's time to SEGREGATE the shit out of this community, be an individual, not a collective
Ghurl I thought I was the only one that got attacked for calling myself transsexual … I’m like that’s what we was called in the 80’s 90’s. And these new ones saying what we should be calling ourselves. And yes trans kids/ teens were a thing in my day also…
Funny, I agree with you. Well said. I have never been a part of the LGBTXSQTRVNOMY crowd. I tried a couple times, because I wanted to feel supported, but it never resonated; I was uncomfortable. I transitioned entirely on my own without anyone to sort of talk with; I missed not having that. Enjoy
Like Maya alluded to in the video, the LGBTQ+ community is more of a political movement and ideology. A very toxic one in my opinion too. But I think more and more people like yourself are just doing their own thing now and just live their life :)
Maya. Right on the mark. You are very clear, and you have to negotiate dangerous waters in society. Besides, you have a perfect right to identify yourself.
Yeah, I agree. I used to think initially, I was non-binary. But upon reflection, I discovered that the masculine expression that I once had was something that I did not choose, and was rather placed upon me via expectations from society and culturally speaking. But now, several years into my transition and practically living stealth, and being a highly desirable woman, as it is, I feel more comfortable and aligned with the term transsexual, as do you. Nothing against the nonbinary community or others by the way. We just aren’t all that same and that’s okay. Best of luck.
I honestly hate the whole labels thing being who I am. I am just me. That's all I want from my existence, I'm always searching for a label, but don't fit perfectly into any of them. This was wonderful to hear Maya. Thank you! Love your dress too by the way, silver is such a cool color 🩶 (they need sparkles on the silver heart IMO)
Thank you for your openness to educating! Cis person's question, to understand better: Is -gender associated with gender identity (i.e., who a person is) and -sexual associated with sexuality (i.e., who a person loves)?
This is exactly what I think. I'm not transmedicalist (at least not 100%?) nor "tucute" (not 100% also), I believe what makes sense TO ME. And I really hate when either "side" assumes you are "the enemy" just because you either question or don't agree entirely with all of their ideology. The trans community shouldn't have "sides", we are individuals, we have different opinions, let's discuss them with respect and not push them onto others or get mad when someone doesn't agree.
Well said. I have held true to myself in using the original terminology too. I was leaving comments on different podcasting sites for awhile, attempting to point to the differences between "Transgender" vs. "Transsexual." You are right. I could agree that at one point in my transition, that point being, from my time exploring and challenging myself to solve this struggle, of figuring out who I am and what is wrong with me, through to the period I had, living for two years presenting in the gender of a woman; during, and after that period, I realized and confirmed I was a Transsexual woman. Then I had my primary vaginoplasty, which was the best thing I had done to treat my Gender Dysphoria. I really wanted to fit in and be welcomed, as a Transsexual woman, within the womens social culture; I had been, and still am, but this radically disrespectful element from within the Transgender community has and is, threatening to change that. I identify with the binary of biological male and female; I am different by my male genetic construct, I know this, but I don't broadcast it. My mental illness has and continues to be responding quite well to the medical and psychological treatment I have received. Oh, I also sacrificed competing in sports; it would be unfair and disrespectful on so many levels; it's part of the cost of transitioning. I will never really be a woman, I am a pseudo-woman; I am just, well, different. Enjoy and Thank You Young Lady Biological women who are screaming now about men pretending to be women have a point. I don't entirely agree with some of it and how far they are going to fight back against people like me. I have never intruded into women's spaces; I have shown respect pending being invited in; forced inclusion by regulatory law changes that the Transgender community advocates have imposed on society is obscene. Women who refuse to accept Transgender women into their spaces don't really know the difference that a Transsexual woman presents, and they are strong in their belief that we are phonies, we are not Trans-Women because we cannot change our sex, that we are delusional male transvestites, or gay, or female impersonators who have gone to far, and that we should remain within the male arena and keep our of the female arena; no matter to what extent you have gone to fit in.
I totally agree with your desicion and I also think that you meet the definition for transsexual. I also think that you removing your experience from a political ideology is awesome! Its so rare to see and it just makes you all the more authentic in my book 🎉🎉
While I am not able to surgically transition due to health issues. I feel that Transgender is a good term. However, I do have an issue with people self diagnosising being "Transgender " or "Transexual". Going through all the steps in our journey is not something that should be done light heartedly and self diagnosis is. People should take the time follow the WPATH guidelines and get a diagnosis, mental health is not a game. HRT does have side-effects and must be done in a doctors care. Using a team to help a person in their transition will help the community as a whole.
Totally agree, transexualism is our diagnosis and medical journey for cure and a happy and fulfilled life. A very medical topic that shouldn't be politicized. Thanks for speaking up for us and clarifying :) I am super happy that we have access to the treatment we need and it makes us free and we can live on freely in our true selves. Sending kisses ❤
I totally get what you are saying. My sister is Post-op and wants nothing to do with the "movement" and just wants to be seen as one of the girls and live her life. She isn't stealth but just doesn't care about pushing any agenda.
Yay! The term is precise and exact. You may know that the "transgender" label was coined by an American transvestite male who called himself Virginia Prince who was very dismissive of people born male who wanted to change their body to harmonize with their mind. Transsexual to me means having physical sex dysphoria so severe that the organs in question must be minimized, hidden or fixed. Whereas I encounter people who call themselves transgender while being perfectly happy to keep their male organs. And I can respect their right to their self identity but I could never understand it for myself. Bravo to you! Your presentation is clear and shows understanding and empathy. Bigger fan of you now (always was!). Please keep posting!
Prince did not coin "transgender," only popularized use of the term as distinct from transsexual to refer to those who didn't "fully" transition (she actually did transition and used feminine pronouns BTW). The term was used previously in clinical literature, synonymous w/transsexual but referencing more the cross-identification aspect, vs physical sex. Christine Jorgensen fit the traditional definition of transsexual but from the 70s on used "transgender" to refer to herself, because she felt it was more specific to the core issue of gender identity. Not quibbling over use of the term "transsexual," just correcting a common misunderstanding of the history.
I remember watching you 8 years ago when You and I just started our transition. I am so happy to hear these words coming from you. I didn't agree with most of your opinions, thats why it really is resfresing to hear. I've had pretty much the same experience as you (HRT, SRS, Legal name and sex change). I am more of a right leaning in terms of politics, i have never understood non-binary. I always smelled it would become this ideology. I understand that people are experiencing different mental problems, as I did, yes i suffer from gender dysphoria, it's a condition. I was extremely lucky to be born in Poland where i transitioned at the age of 20 (I am almost 29 now) i live a happy life, no one around me in my work space knows my background, they assume I am a woman. I am really grateful for that. At the same time it doesn't mean that a woman or a man that feels fluid in their gender expression has the same experience as I. It really creates confiusion. We fought so hard to be taken seriously, and now after all those years i fell like this movement is making a mockery out of itselft.
My spouse is non-binary. They've discovered that at 35yo, they are NOT being political NOT ideological. It's sad for me that as people of the LGBTQIA+ community they still have to fight for people to realize they literally exist and are real and valid among their own community that should accept, protect and recognize them... I hope you'll change your mind on that some day, and congrats on your transition, I hope you can live as your true self and have a very happy life.
@@simplepage Ok, so he/she is a gender non conforming male or female, that's it. They were feminine men and masculine women before the trans movement...No one is denying their existence. I am just saying that, if you SAY you're non-binary and you don't FEEL male/female that doesn't mean you're trans. Having gender dysphoria is extremely hard condition that i don't wish upon anyone. If you live in US/Canada/Europe/Australia you have every right to wear or feel whatever you want, you're extremely priviledged. I don't understand the need to give yourself the victim card" look im non-binary, i struggle..."it's a joke.
The interesting thing is that my spouse does have gender dysphoria and does hrt and laser hair removal. Enby people do have gender dysphoria and I kinda don't know where you get the idea they don't? I agree it's awful and stressful, especially if like my spouse you had that your whole life without knowing why or what it was, just feeling there is something wrong with you but being unable to put words on it and talk about it to people that are your agab (even more so if you're amab I think). They didn't even let me touch their face for years because of how it reminded them they had a "beard" despite being very well shaved every day, and that's only one example. I'm really sorry you had to get through that, but pain shouldn't be a contest, and some trans folx (enby and trans women or men) don't have gender dysphoria or very little. That doesn't mean they are not trans nor does that mean they won't undergo surgery or HRT. Trans means transition, literally. Changing pronouns, name, the way you present yourself and sometimes your whole appearance through medical intervention makes you trans, because you transition from your assigned gender at birth to the gender that feels right for you. I wish you could see that, because my spouse and I would fight for you to have the rights to be seen as the woman you are and live in a world where you don't need to prove you are one and can live without fear. I would also hope you'll do the same for people that are really not that far away from what you are and feel pretty much the same. If you have any questions on this subject I would gladly answer them. If you prefer not to respond that's also your choice. In any case I wish you still a happy and fulfilling life no matter what
@@simplepage No, the whole premise of being a transsexual is having gender dysphoria, that's why you transition to feel more comfortable with your whole body. If you don't feel any discomfort with your secondary sexual characteristics there is no point in transition. And this is the problem with "non-binary", people say i didn't experience dysphoria, but i like presenting masculine and feminine, depends on the mood. Ok, no one is saying you can't, If you live in the West, you have every right to do so but it doesn;t automatically say you are trans. You say your spouse experience dysphoria, is taking HRT, doing lasers, but he is comfortable living as a man, and that is ok, he is not a victim nor i am. If he comes to the realisation that he wants to live as a woman, then do it. I don't understand why people want to feel inferior, victimized. No one cares, what you feel like or look like. I think the biggest point where we would disagree is that i know there are 2 genders (not talking about pathology in genetics or endocrine problems) and you and your spouse probably believe there is more or something in between. No one is making you fight for anything, It's not the 50's or 60's, you can do whatever you want with your life. Your spouse is extremely lucky enough that he won't be stoned for any homosexual and gender bending activity like in the middle east. I am not even going to start with the pronouns they/them etc, it just shows that you want everyone around you to cater towards your emotions "i dont feel comfortable with he/him, she/her" too bad, it's the real world, there are real problems, you can't demand everyone around you to walk on egg shells to avoid misgendering you, if you can't stand the thought that someone will refer to you as he/she, there are bigger problems inside you. Life is hard. Best of luck to you and your spouse!
@@marsellae I'm sorry you have such hatred inside you... I hope one day you'll find peace and stop being negative and saying things deliberately to hurt people. Also you say they don't have any problems while also being the embodiment of what they have to live with everyday and why and what they have to fight against. It's a sad thing seeing someone trans and also transphobic. Since you're disrespecting my spouse I won't interact with you anymore, I can see you are not in the right mental space for this complicate conversation nor being rational right now.
totally agree with you, and it’s sad that people are sending you hate. words mean things, and as you said, if you telling people you’re transgender just makes them confused there’s nothing wrong with using a word that would make it clearer. also, i personally think there’s nothing wrong with acknowledging that someone who has transitioned medically has had a different experience in life than someone who hasn’t. nobody can define who is ‘really’ trans or whatever but there’s nothing wrong with being in your own category of trans that doesn’t always overlap with the rest. labels are used to communicate information, and if the ‘agreed upon’ label isn’t cutting it, why not go back to something that does?
In the mid 70s there were few resources for gender dysphoria. Reading books by transsexuals like Canary Conn set the definitions though very narrow in scope. Mayas use of transsexual for those fully committed to transition is the world I grew up in and makes perfect sense to me. Go Maya.
I 100% agree. Policies for or against Transgender people misrepresent transsexuals in terms od experience and what is good or bad for us. I find this distinction important for health, representation and legislation. I totally resonate with yout statement because changing gender and changing sex are different things.
Omg! YES 🙌🏻 I’m so happy to hear you’re literally keeping us Transexuals alive! 😭🥰❣️ I think the same on this subject! I no longer feel so alone anymore on this! Thank You Maya! Everybody in these comment sections bring me so much Love knowing they also agree to! 🥲❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥
I totally agree. I see the transition as more of an individual journey rather than a political movement. I am a transsexual lady. When I go to Germany, I am a Trans Frau.
As a post op girl, I couldn’t agree more! Although transgender is a part of my history, it doesn’t describe me or who I’ve become since transitioning. ❤
Well said same here x
People don't understand. Trans went through the physical process to fit how they feel. They did this for themselves, not for anyone else. This makes them happy. I say more power to them. After all, everyone goes through life looking for what makes them happy. For Trans, this is one of those. And it's perfectly fine to think you're no longer tran after op. This is part of that happiness. You're a beautiful woman. Even though you're not capable of getting pregnant, you're still a woman. Having said that, some women can't get pregnant, for whatever reason, because of their problems with the reproductive system. The bottom line is be happy who you are and what you have.
You should all watch The Danish Girl to guide you about transition!😊Maya is lucky to pass as a woman without FFS! Look out for Colleen at a Toronto Starbucks!
you're a man.
@@jeffmedlock2782If my insurance covered FFS i would have did it by now!!! FOR SURE
Maya, as an older transgender-transexual woman I so much agree with you. Some of us are simply binary and changed our gender and sex. I too don't identify with the non-binary trans community. Thank you for being such an eloquent spokeswomen for us transsexuals!😘
You bring up an excellent question which is, are trans people actually changing their gender? For myself I'm finally living as my true gender after many many years of pretending to be the gender that is usually associated with my physical body. That is my experience and I always assumed, possibly incorrectly, that my experience is shared by all trans people.
@@emilytrott Thank you so much for your comment. I miss spoke, I did not change my gender. I often tell people that the only thing that I changed was my physical body. I was always female.
Ehhh you can’t really change ur sex,ur gender is woman sure,but ur sex remains the same. You’re a woman sure but always AMAB
>transgender-transsexual
>converted-convertible
>bicycle-2wheel
How many kids did you diddle?
No one can change their sex. Transgender women’s neovagina is not a vagina it’s an artificial cosmetic structure that’s not suppose to be there which is why it’s always attempting to close.
Maya, this is one of the best videos you’ve done. I relate to this almost one hundred percent. I’m trying to find my place in the world and community as a trans woman. Thank you for your insight and heart and care.
Your place is not in women's spaces. Get out and stay out of women's spaces. You have no idea the damage you do. You don't know because you don't care.
I completely respect your choice to use whatever term you wish. For the record, I've only been on HRT for a few months and call myself a transwoman. Even if I have surgeries, I think I will always refer to myself as transgender rather than transexual. The reason being is this: I think we, in 2023, are currently in the hey-day of gender transitioning. It is almost mainstream nowadays. But I feel that there will soon be a big(ger) push back from the current mood in society. We've had our two steps forward and now is the time for 1 step back. I think the trans community need to stay closely knit and support one another rather than splinter into seperate groups (transexual / transgender / whatever else). You are free to do you and seek your own happiness, but for the sake of staying strong as a community and showing support for others who have yet to embark on their journey, I'll remain transgender.
Additionally (and about this I have no opinion), I think you are also opening yourself up to criticism of the anti-trans activists. Aren't they going to say that; it's one thing to identify as a woman (ie your gender), but you can't change your chromosones (ie your sex)?
Hooray for you Maya !! i transitioned m-f over 50 years ago, my problems since have been similar to most other women. i have little urge to identify with TG, yet i proudly acknowledge TS if i must be labelled.
You've got 15 years on my transition but it's interesting how the terms have changed over the years. Back in the 80's I never liked the term sex change or transsexual so I started using trans. Now I just use woman as trans has become too vague.
@@braaaplife557 You made the right choice because a "woman" is what we are, and there is no reason to have to explain to others other than in political discussions to differentiate between cis and trans people.
Be the person you want to be, but be sure that this is the life you want to adapt to.
The idea of being transgender is a good step to make aslong as you have support of your friends that are understanding you should get through any problems that may be encountered.
Yes. Just yes. Thank you!
Really, 50 yrs? Someone close to my age, that seems a rarity. I started 24 years ago, transitioning, and had vaginoplasty 16 years ago.
I am definitely switched from one extreme to the other, of the binary, extreme. My mental health has been much improved.
Enjoy
Very well spoken! As a 52 y/o trans person myself. Transsexual is what I relate with myself.
🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮
@@someoneelse3173 the plus side of being my age. I don't care if you agree with me.
I have struggled awkwardly at times with saying to others I'm Transgender. But transsexual feels comfortable, and I'm elated knowing one more thinks like me . Happy holidays! ❤
Transsexual was always the correct term til yall generation allowed transgender “ umbrella term “.
This isn't a new thing. Check out Buck Angel or Blaire White or Marcus Dibs...
I absolutely implore no one ever check out Buck Angel, Blaire White, or Marcus Dibs. They're truly awful people, and I don't relate to them or their toxic ideologies at all. They're every bit as harmful and uninformed as the people they criticize - especially Marcus, who I'm fairly certain is an angry f*g-h*g who medically transitioned to get a pass for being transphobic, which is the same thing I see a lot of newer "trans women" and "nonbinary" people as doing.
Blaire occasionally makes decent points but then overshadows them with far right talking points, classism, transmedicalism, transphobia, racism, and wanton ignorance and historical illiteracy.
Alexis Blake is a significantly better voice for quasi-conservative transsexuals. Though she, too, has some problematic blindspots, she at least avoids the self-righteous arrogance of White, Buck, and Dibs - all of whom would argue that Maya is a man with a mutilated penis, as opposed to the gorgeous, in tact woman she is.
@@icyflann7178Ew. Imagine using Buck Angel or Blaire White as a good resource for trans issues. Couldn't be me.
@@artluver94c You are doing what vegans did and I can assure you it 100% did not end well for us. The world is watching you right now.
Transgender is an umbrella term and emcompasses many different types of people. Each type has their own issues and challenges. It is totally fine to use terminology that more specifically defines who you are.
You are a classy and beautiful woman, period. I don't see you as anything else because you dont act like anything other than who you are at this point in your life. You respect yourself and are true to yourself. I think you deserve respect just for that alone. You are an inspiration, and you should be proud.
❤You are an inspiration to all of us(followers)
Your narrative shows the depth of your beliefs and your positive honesty. Personally I am in awe of your bravery in confronting all the challenges.
Hi I’m not sure if how many of these comments you read but I just wanted to say as a grandfather and husband of 40 years I really don’t understand why any one would be horrible to you. As far as I’m concerned understanding and kindness is what we should expect from others unfortunately we don’t see that especially from the religious right and insecure. Good luck to you and I hope you have a happy and long life.
Maya,
I am a woman first and my transition was due to an error at my birth.
I also am a Trans Woman and will always support my community.
Personal relationships require disclosure, IMO.
Be comfortable with your labels, and someday we can stop and be people.
❤
Yes, 'stop and be a person' hits the mark.
My wife stopped using any term to identify herself except female/woman. She was trans but after her final surgery she considers herself female, as do everyone else. It isn't an issue in her life
Anyone should do what they feel is best. An identity doesn't harm others. Actions do.
To be honest, I am tired of all these labels generated by society....it seems to be causing too much division and hatred. I say just be ourselves, whatever that is!! NO more labels! Love your channel!
they make all these ridiculous labels for themselves. norhing to do with "society"
society is the sum of "they", Jimmy! you're eternally stuck in the 70s you lucky dog!@@JimmyHandtrixx
I think it is the LGBTQ-community that introduce these labels. It is quite confusing for me as a cis-woman.
@@alicelund147 they invented cis. you are just a woman. otherwise these clowns would be trans-cis.....see how fucking ridiculous it is. dont let them control you. they dont care about you.
I disagree with the continued "Ideology" language. That is the talking point of the right. Reclaim and use the term transexual. Its a matter of squares and rectangles. Transexual is a subset but will forever be part of the larger community. I have had HRT and surgery. There are things that we exclusively experience but we are not so different than someone else in the community that has for example socially but not medically transitioned. The community is not a monolith but we can't play us vs them in today's environment.
I'm not trying to divide anyone. I'm just quietly stepping out of a noisy room brimming with loud voices of every kind, a cacophony reverberating off of every surface, filling every millisecond of silence. I'm entering a quieter more relatable lounge down the hall where I can sip a cosmo and cackle with the dolls over our shared experience of transexual womanhood. There's enough people stuffed into the former room for no one to notice my departure. It doesn't mean I won't poke my head back in once and a while, but I've found a much more accessible, and calm venue to inhabit for the foreseeable future.
@Mayavhenry And that is great for you. No issues there. Maybe it wasn't intentional, though the language felt "othering" particularly referring to non-binary with reference to Ideology and the term lacking meaning. For us binary individuals it doesn't mean much just as trans(whatever root word) means little to cis folks, but for those that it is their only feeling of alignment it is everything. By all means I'm not meaning to come at you as I've followed your journey for 6 years. I'm only am addressing perhaps the delivery.
@@Krysten_now honestly though you are one of the reasons why I am many of others thaat are aactually trans and don't go under the umbrella of t he fake guise of being nonbinary, it was called something else before everyone made a big deal and its called being androgynous. How about you stop being so emotional and such a snowflake. Maya can literally say whatever she wants how she wants and she doesnt need you telling her how she should say it because it doesnt align with your slow way of thinking. Nonbinary doesnt make you transgender at all -- actual transsexuals really get the shit end of the stick because we have blue hair, scream fest of girls trying to be different.
i repeat being trans and nonbinary are TWO different things and not the same. will never be the same.
@@Krysten_now queer theory is real
Maya, I love these videos where just sit down and tell us your thoughts. I have watched you grow into the person you are now. Always speaking with intelligence and honesty. Keep it up ! You are a beautiful person.
Thank you! I was worried the format may be a bit of a bore but I can see it’s inciting an engaging response! 😊
@@Mayavhenry Like I said, your honesty and intelligence is outstanding. From someone looking from the outside in, you have given me great insight. I only wish there was a way to communicate privately. Anyway, keep it up, you are a voice that should be heard and listened to.
I got draaaaagggged for defending terms like transexual, transvestite…heck even just saying you’re a women (post op). I UNDERSTAND because I’m not trans. But I call women like you “woman” and don’t apologize for it. Great video.
You do you Maya! Even though I technically fit under the term transsexual, having undergone medical transition, I dislike using it for myself because I feel it perpetuates the common misconception that being trans has anything to do with sexuality. That being said, I’m a huge advocate for everyone to use the terms they find most empowering for themselves, and think that no one should have a say in what labels others use for themselves. It’s definitely important that we as a community can discuss these things without immediately being at each other’s throats, and because of that, thank you for making this video! It's honestly quite refreshing to see a person assert their identity without putting other people down.
Yes I also wondered why people think it has anything to do with sexuality, especially when I've seen some detransitioners saying they've been basically raped by hormonal transition, and I'm like whaa? like how? Some people even think that a child transitioning is a sex crime, lol, that one had me laughing on the floor. To me it is as much a change of physical body as anything else. But personally I prefer transsexual because it acknowledges that everything about human beings is driven by sexual energy oscillating between masculine and feminine, so it makes sense to me to call it trans-sexual, as we're alrering sexual dynamics and characteristics of the body, not sex per se, the problem is that a lot of bigots dont understand this important nuance, that our entire body is bascially sexed, and it has nothing to do with sexuality of the person, but sexed body as a whole.
I LOVE 💗 your analysis. Couldn’t agree more!
@@Shalanaya Go do a search. For all the things you are convinced are not happening. There are so many videos where this is all about sex in public places and you are acting like those trans people do not exist. Your community is large and diverse, and the rest of us are actually looking at the whole picture not just listening to YOU pander your ridiculous delusions.
to be fair, when you medically transition you're changing your sex characteristics, so transsexual is actually a more accurate description of someone who takes HRT and undergoes surgery
In your case, in my opinion you could drop the "trans" & just identify as "young woman" ! I realize from a technical DNA related aspect you would disclose it to a significant other, but your beauty, mannerisms, speech, & attitude shout female! I'm a 75 y o very hertrosexual male, that knows a woman when I see one! I'd have no trouble pursuing you in my younger days! I'm fiercely independent & never influenced by thinking of the masses. I've seen men with feminine traits, & even had schoolmates that suffered from what was called in the 1950's "morphidites", (born with undefined genitalia) No shame was assigned to them & they only needed to chose which gender they identified with, have the surgery & all was well! I've had several life or death medical procedures done, so how is a surgery to clear up a life threatening disphoria in many cases, wrong? No stigma was attached in a religious sense by the devout of the time, such was a decision left to the Creator. Modern times seem to digitalize, classify, & micromanage aspects of the human experiance. I've my own relationship with the creator. I know what I have to do! Each needs to figure that out for themselves. Few in the masses agree with me, but they don't pay my bills, or guarantee my salvation. Of course only "cis" women car bear children, but then many for whatever reason can't, due to some problem. My first wife was one, & I never was a father. But that 's okay. I'm sad for her, but we play the hand we're dealt. God at times can be a tough hombre, & he expects us to count what blessings we have, & "suck it up buttercup"! Your blessed to live your life as you see fit! I'm proud of you, carry on!
maya, i think it's great that you have found your own identity and expressed it with us. it's great to have kept with you over the years, watching your videos, and seeing you transition into the mature woman you are now. i wish i could be where you are right now. unfortunately, i wasn't given the opportunity to transition, and i have been silently suffering in my dysphoria, only opening up very slowly, so some people that are close to me. i'm honestly kind of losing hope, i don't think i will ever be in the situation you are in. also, while i respect your decision, do keep in mind that you probably wouldn't be able to distance yourself from "transgender" if you didn't pass as well as you do. it's definitely a great privilege to have, and it's the result of your long and arduous journey, but do keep in mind that a lot of people who identify as binary transgender aren't necessarily different than you. that's all, i'm very proud of you, and i will keep following you because you are an awesome human being ❤❤❤
I think her point is not only about passing as a woman or have undergone surgery; but that she identify as a woman that express and present herself as a woman, that follow "traditional" gender roles, is attracted to men and have relations with men et cetera. But i might have misunderstood it because it is quite complicated with all these terms.
no, i get that, i really do. as i said, i would love to be in her place, but it's not (realistically) achievable if you don't pass. @@alicelund147
also theres some trans women who after transitioning go full terf mode and bury their transness and hide it even from themselves, which is not the best place to be. i'm sure maya won't be like that, but it's important to be humble and know where you come from.@@alicelund147
"More questions than answers" is something I can relate to
Tbh at this point I kinda feel like the whole concept of gender isnt helpful. Not when ur talking about about individuals at least. All it does is iron out all the little things that make each of us special and unique. And makes the world a grey and boring place instead of a beautiful rainbow ❤
I transitioned 50 years ago as a Transsexual Female. I went into the world as female, not Transgender. I changed my sex as in organs to fit my gender which was female. The public’s acceptance of us was due to us living under the radar and not causing trouble. 50 years later I’m happy and content with who I am.
I had a friend in Idaho in the 90s who was just like you. We all loved him, I never once saw him bullied for who he was. But he never ever not even once tried to force anything on anyone he was just a wonderful person, before and after transition.
That is the way I have always understood it. My mom let me watch an interview with Christine Jorgensen. I was only 7 years old. Yes, liberal parenting. I understood what was being said. When I saw a picture of “George”, for me he didn’t exist. I’m watching a lovely woman named Christine. She’s always been Christine. Now she’s had the surgeries and everything else she needed to do so that now we “see” the physical Christine. Outside now matches who she’s always been. Courageous lady.
Mother Nature hates such medicine that allows people to transition
I don't understand how "transsexual" is any more gender specific than "transgender"
do you feel you understand transgender? What is your understanding?
people like you don’t realise how special you are you are amazing intelligent and beautiful ps i’m trans to x
Maya, there you go again, flashing that sexy brain of yours. It's always refreshing to hear your clear headed and logical thoughts. Listening to you over the years has done a lot to set my mind straight about transsexual and transgendered people.
Hey Maya, I think it's super neat that you're changing how you identify in line with what works better for you. Personally, I think the more labels we are collectively okay with people using, the better! Though, I will say I think it misses the mark a little when you say non-binary has more to do with politics or political alignment than it does with peoples identity. That feels more like something that's been forced onto people by prejudice than anything that someone would choose for themselves.
Agreed, that part sucked
Girl, our transitional timeline is so similar. It is insane. I totally know where you are and how you're feeling right now. And you couldn't be more correct. The umbrella term of transgender is so much that I don't understand it. So how can I expect anyone outside of the community? Understand it. Separating myself from the term and just using transsexual is much better, more direct, and it just makes more sense. Overall. Overall. Kudos to you for putting that out there
All I can say is from my experience. When I had my operation. I dropped any term with transgender transvestite or transexual. Whatever and I was strictly female and female only. I haven't regretted that decision since. I am a female to everybody. I know everything so I would highly suggest that dropping transgenderism. And whatever else that you want to call it and just say that you are female
You are right on target! ❤
I'm really happy for you for reaching a point in your transition where you pass and can live fully as a woman. Many will never reach that place, and I'm glad you have found a label that fits who you feel you are now. Maybe I just don't travel in the same circles as you do, but I've never encountered anyone who was non-binary for "political reasons." Some people are enbys because we will never pass. Some are enbys because we don't want to pass. But please, don't dismiss any of us as an "ideology." That's what the straights have been trying to do to _all of us_ by calling it "transgenderism." It's what the "LGB drop the T" crowd have been trying to do to _all of us._
I understand the allure of respectability politics, but it's not worth it. We're all in this together.
I don't relate to the NB experience. Why is that so hard to grasp? I want to exist in a space where I can relate to other transexual women who have medically transitioned. I don't care if you're an 80 year-old ex-linebacker who wishes they would have transitioned. If you haven't done so, you don't know what it's like, and you can't speak on the experience. Of course, I am advocating over and over for peace and love for all gender experiences in this video. I'm not being political. I genuinely don't align with every viewpoint in the Transgender community these days. Why would I pretend otherwise? "We're all in this together" -- I certainly don't align my thoughts with someone simply because they identify within the transgender community. We all have differing views and experiences that go so far beyond gender. Can we unite against bigotry against the trans and LGBT community at large? Of course! We MUST. But that doesn't mean I'm going to agree with every nuance or every transgender person's perception of bigotry.
Nonbinary for political reasons exist allover washington state. I just quit a job I loved because they took over the place and are allowed to do whatever the eff they want just because they ID as nonbinary. They even bring in fecal matter from their pets to eat in their lunch box they are that freaking gross.
Maya - it is refreshing and impressive to see you take ownership of who you are; and clearly that is a woman and womanhood! You have walked the walk & taken the profound actions to align your life/body, with your heart & mind. Transexual def fits better than transgender… ❤
When I saw the title, the term 'transsexual' came to mind, however thought you might think it was too specific to use. So, yes, good for you in making this distinction. :)
I love your attitude of "you do you" and accept others. We are not a monolith and there are different experiences out there. If people get angry it is their own insecurity talking
I am old enough to remember when the world completely dismissed Transgender identity, so it is unsurprising to me that the world is pushing back on other gender identities. This doesn't make it right, it simply explains that there is a process here. You are young enough and lucky enough to be an adult at a time when broad segments of our society understand and at least somewhat accept Transgender identity. Had you been born at the time I was, you would have a very different opinion on the need to tell people who you are and to fight for space within society.
I ID as an Androgyne, under the Non-binary identity. I am sad this term doesn't make sense to you. But I also remember how the gay community dismissed Transgender identity, so even our own LGBTQIA+ community has a history of marginalizing some of our own people. It is something important to understand and remember.
I live my life without having to tell people in my life who I am or about my identity. I am lucky, I live around very forward thinking people who have been fighters in the cause for Queer rights for many decades. But I do need to make space to be who I am in the work place, in general society. In exactly the same way my generation's Trans community had to fight for their space. We don't "push" our identity on people, we claim the right to exist, we claim inclusion and equitable protection under the law, also just like Trans people.
Gender identities off the binary have existed for as long as recorded history in cultures all around the world. This is also an undeniable fact. While they used other cultural and local terms for these gender identities, the are well documented and an undeniable part of the human experience. Non-binary is a term that is younger than I am, but it was a welcome new term to broadly explain 3rd and other gender identities with a shared language and understanding.
I encourage you to look beyond your own generation, experience and perspective to learn the history of non-binary genders and to make the effort to see the Trans community, and yourself, through the history of Trans fights for rights and inclusion and see that the exact same struggle is now being waged by Non-binary people for the opportunity to live freely and inclusively, without the need to fight for space. Until that happens, we have no choice but to raise our voices to educate others, to claim space in society and to assure equality. Again, just like Trans people have done for the past several decades.
I am an advocate because this is the time to advocate. My identity doesn't define who I am, it is just one aspect of who I am. I am a technical manager, an American expat, a musician, an organizer, a friend, a writer, and so much more. But I don't need to fight for space as any of these things. I do need to fight for space and inclusion to dress as I wish to and to be protected from discrimination, unlawful exclusion, denial of medical care and consequences to protect me from violence. That is why I advocate and that is why my identity is sometimes at the forefront of my interaction with the world.
Very well articulated, and I also wholeheartedly agree with what you say. I wish people in the LGBTQIA+ community would accept and protect their own kin. It's so sad to have to prove to the world you exist and valid. She says you have to look how you want people to treat you. I'm really curious, what does she thinks being non-binary looks like? Also would she use them/them pronouns automatically if someone "looked" androgynous enough? What if she hears the person's voice and it sounds more fem or masc, would she uses their AGAB pronouns then? Or if someone has done HRT to be more androgynous and got top surgery, would she use "he/him" pronouns because the other person doesn't have boobs, so duuuh they have to be a man?
That doesn't make any sense to me. It's border line transphobic, because YES non-binary people ARE trans people. My spouse discovered they were non-binary at 35yo, they are NOT doing it for attention, politic or ideology reasons and it's wrong to assume they are. They want to live as they are, their true self and what feels right for them, just like any trans person, like Maya is. It's unfair to say this kind of stuff just because you don't understand a concept. Read stuff, talk to people and ask around, don't be transphobic like that with your own people...
I agree with this 100%! I haven't undergone surgery YET but I relate to this all the way. For girls or guys who have are will undergo surgery, the term "TRANSGENDER" is just the 1st stepping stone towards becoming who you truly identify as...yes we are still transgender but transexual is like...the final goal of who we ARE! if that makes ANY sense lol I can be terrible at trying to explain things lol but yeh I agree with Maya! 💜
Yes "that makes any sense," because the journey from one extreme of the binary to the other extreme takes one through the Transgender Umbrella phase to finally get there.
@@aerondanann8683 There is no place called there.. life is a problem not to be solved , ,,,,,,,
i decided to not transition for several reasons, mostly medical reasons, but there were also other reasons and one of the bigger ones was exactly what you have said in this video. i am hundred percent sure my brains is convinced i am a man, and consequently i feel huge amounts of dysphoria. i am also not certain transition is necessarily the cure, it might as well not help at all. maybe in future we will find something else, and maybe i will just feel too bad and will transition. who knows. however, politics and everything that is happening around this movement is definitely pushing me away very strongly and probably not making my life better.
Exactly 💯
We do need to distinguish ourselves from the transgender political movement. Our narratives are used as support for the larger community when our lived experience is not about identity or political but about Being.
Here, here; sign me on. One extreme to the other extreme, that is Trans-Sexual
Or, pseudo-woman, pseudo-mam =Transsexual.
Just live and experience the fullness that is this God given life. Just fit in, love, and be; be a respectful, productive and supportive member of the society we are a part of; get to know your neighbors. Hmmm, musings.
Enjoy
Exactly, we are individuals! We don't need labels. Once you start labeling people and putting them into different groups, hatred is usually right behind it.
As a post op, I too don’t relate to the term transgender but use transsexual if it ever needs to be discussed. I live my life as other women without parades and flags.
Very interesting to hear your thoughts! This video popped up on my recommended, so I haven't seen your videos before, but this one is certainly thought provoking. As a nonbinary/queer person myself, I'm at a transitional point in my journey where I'm moving away from most labels and mostly identifying as just queer, and I've been thinking a lot about how labels can evolve and change with us as we grow. I'm glad that you've found a label that works better for you!
💯 agree. Thank you for speaking on this. I also don't use the term transgender and it has been difficult to say the least with having to navigate the guantlet of misconceptions and negatively that has invaded our space and lives, politicisation notwithstanding. Love you, Maya 😌🫶🦋🩷
This is genius. I do think there needs to be the distinction. You're beautiful. I love you! Keep doing what you're doing!
@13:31 Thank you! Very well said. You're the first person I've heard transcend the ideology and be able to navigate a truly philosophical space. Sincerely, I hope more people get to hear this, because it's profound.
I called myself transsexual after bottom surgery 15 years ago. Recently though I feel that I am not allowed to say this as it's exclusionary. They make me feel bad about myself when I shouldn't, I love and respect everyone and would never try to make them feel bad. I am so glad people are standing up and reclaiming the word because it is so much more precise and describes us much better with less explanation. I am still a transgender woman but also more precisely a transsexual woman. Thanks Maya for making this video and explaining it so well.
Some women are given womanhood on a plate but we have earned it.
That's the crazy part about it. Calling ourselves transsexuals is look down upon by others in the LGBT community or by a lot of activists. Just because it is exclusionary like you said. But at the end of the day it is exclusionary so we deserve that right. There is a clear life and lived experience to be had after undergoing such a transition.
love this for you maya! congratulations. my humble opinion as someone not in the trans community, when i hear transexual it bears more weight and seriousness, in a good way. i love it. go girl xoxox
Maya, I absolutely understand your points. You are such a great example of a confident person who is not afraid to live their life the way they want while still being respectful of other people's choices. One of the reasons why I have been following you for a while and will continue to support you. Much love.
Why I love hearing you talk about Transgender and your life experiences as a trans women
I also don't tell people I'm transgender, I haven't said the term to describe myself since like 2017 or 18 I think. I call myself a transgirl or transwoman. I've felt for a long time that the trans umbrella taking on literally everything has made it so confusing for people and when I hear people use the term, people start walking on eggshells because they're straight up scared of offending people.
When I say I'm a trans girl I never have problems. It tells them exactly what they want/need to know, there's no follow up questions or awkward avoidance of conversation.
I completely identify with the trans community, but I 100% agree, a lot of the things said in the community are super gatekeepy. It really feels if you are a "cis-passing" person then you get treated as if you're not really trans, or if you want to conform to certain gender roles then you're not *really* trans. Which is so messed up. It can sometimes feel like we're getting pushed out of our own community honestly, because we care about or do things things that somehow perpetuate transphobia or something like that. What I try to remember is that these people aren't real, that's just how certain people act on the Internet and if I met them in real life they'd likely be normal or someone I wouldn't want to hear the opinion of anyway.
I just had to erase so much because I'm rambling. Thanks for making this video. Anybody who thinks you're somehow disrespecting other trans people this way need to take a break from being online.
I so appreciate hearing your nuanced thoughts and experiences- thank you for posting!
there has been a lot of regression so its nice to see people pointing out whats working and whats not working in practical terms.
All men, regardless of how they feel, must keep out of women's spaces and sports.
ALL MEN. INCLUDING TRANSWOMEN.
I love you as you inspired me to find myself. I got so lost I almost successfully killed myself. I've now identified myself as Jessica and looking more like my inner self (still developing) with makeup and hair extensions but I do use transgender-non-binary as I listened to your video about being careful especially being assaulted for who I am in my community so I am comfortable in being fluid for my safety even though I am female on the inside. I'm 38 and I have felt depressed and stuck since I was 6 years old and you have inspired and helped me for years. It is especially difficult with severe epilepsy. But I can be as close outside as inside. So lots of love and thank you for everything for me being open you have saved me and helped me genuinely and honesty ❤
I completely agree with this and your previous video, esp about the part about getting our surgeries and just being ourselves, and seeing ourselves more as woman and their experiences rather than the whole transgender ideology
❤
Wow, you are a very wise woman! Thank you for sharing your toughts and perspectives. I have to agree with this video.
Please be strong and I wish you all the best, cheers
There's nothing inherently wrong or negative with the political aspect of "the transgender movement" or "the non-binary community"; there's always going to be disagreements and infighting but also strength, solidarity and pride in just about every major collective. Personally, I will never turn my back on the transgender and non-binary communities, even if I may no longer identify with those labels personally. They were there for me in my darkest moments, supporting me every step of the way, even through all the disagreements and drama; the least I can do is choose to continue to support them unwaveringly and continue to give back to the community when I can as I have done throughout my journey. Turning my back on the very community which was the foundation I built myself on for me just drips with elitism, exclusivity, gatekeeping and privilege. Assigned male at birth, did I want to be female - or at least just being seen as being female - a woman and only a woman? Absolutely. But having achieved that in any capacity doesn't mean I'm going to use the privilege of being female, being seen as female or "cis" (as those vocal "cis" women too painfully often do, as we all know) to complain, to say "Hey, I'm not one of you anymore, alright!?" (Because I've been there, with them, every step of the way - I know what it feels like and I should never forget because I'm in a better place) and talk down on the trans community for "not representing me and every aspect of my experience personally" when my sisters and brothers are being abused constantly, discriminated against for not fitting in with what society expects us to be, beaten, robbed, raped, killed, in backwater countries that have a long way to go or in developed nations. No amount of privilege, affirmation, self-contentment and euphoria that comes from being a woman, being seen as "cis" or being seen as woman, or that comes from being medically affirmed can ever make me walk away and turn my back on my sisters and brothers and non-binary folks who are struggling every day, just because I don't like or want anything to do with the "politics" or because I don't agree with everyone in my community or that simply I don't identify with the labels that are used to describe my experience. I can live my life fully, how I want but I can do at least one of at least two things - enjoy my privilege that comes with being finally seen and accepted as a woman, or look back on not only where I came from and how far I've come (with the help of the community no less) and give back, turn around with a smile and hold out a hand for those even a little less fortunate than myself. Because otherwise, I'll be turning my back on all of that collective suffering of real lives (regardless of any politics whatsoever) and live with blood on my hands. The more we are seen, the more we help each other and stand proud and visible together where and when we can, the better it is for us all in the long run, whether transgender or non-binary or transsexual or just being you. There's enough hate and division out there as is for us not to all stick together, help each other and advocate for each other even as little as we can. Aside from having a particularly traumatic detransition, there's not much reason for anyone who was in any niche corner or any part of our wider community to turn their backs on, and in practical effect become part of, or like our oppressors, to go to being no better than those who can never understand our collective experience. But that's just me and my two cents. Like everyone else.
Beautiful as always!!! Ignore the haters they r not here to learn or discuss !!! You have so much valuable information to share with others!!!
I loved this video, thank you! I am a straight cis male who wants to better understand the trans community and I've always appreciated what you've shared on this channel. What you said in this video makes 100% sense and I absolutely agree with not wanting to be pushed into a label/category, for example, describing myself as "straight cis male" is really a simplification so other people have a general idea of my identity, but my gender identity and sexual orientation are not completely limited to that label. Also, you are the first person that I've heard distinguish between the political element vs the personal journey of trans identity, so you've given words to something that I've been trying to better understand as well.
So many great comments and there is so much associated with being trans* and what that means. No one will have the same experience and it's important that everyone just recognize that fact. So what it is to be trans is soooo broad these days. It would be great to see you on a national 'talk' show to share your wisdom. I wish I could make that happen. You're really going to rock it when you get older (more great perspectives to come) and I hope you're still sharing your experiences then but then again, maybe it just won't be a thing then.... Hugs and Happy Holidays to you and your family.
Ignore the bullies and trolls. Some push transition or push people to "experimenting" with 100 gender possibilities or something, 5:18 i agree its turned into some big confusion. The whole gender revolution thing, there's too much anger (IMO). I love staying out of the way of The Group (I'm independent transitioning) because I'm shy anyhow. 7:55 there is a LOT of relatability here. Thanks for your video.
Me as a trans woman taking HRT being told by a part time cross dresser that we are the same 🙄🙄🙄
they have their thing, we have ours, no tea no shade 💕
In my opinion, if that part time crossdresser sees herself as a woman, and not just as a man who enjoys wearing women's clothing, then she is no different than you, me, or any other trans woman, or for that matter trans man.
@@emilytrott I agree with you, but in this case they did identify as a man and saw it as a fetish, which is where I took issue with them saying we were exactly the same.
@@maddiewadsworth4027 Wow. I'm very sorry you had to listen to something like that. ☹
You are the embodiment of light feminine energy. Beautiful and graceful.
Ooooh I was waiting for this video. I've seen the subtle nods to this in your videos but you've finally come out and said it 👏. As someone that's basically been labeled the Calgarian Blaire White, I get it. All you're doing is respecting the gender binary, and there's nothing wrong with that. It's simple - We want everyone to be happy, we respect that. We had surgeries and did what we did to help with our dysphoria - this is what it means to be transsexual. Now we live our lives and move on.
I'm happy you finally posted this, respect girl 🙌
Lots of great comments in support of this very special video. You have hit on such an important topic around transgender and discussed it in a very delicate and sensible way. I identify very much with the struggles of transitioning and post transition wanting to just live in my ‘aligned’ body as much of a ‘woman’ as anyone else. Thanks for sharing and to all the other positive comments here.
You are so beautifully articulate! You could not have explained it any more clearly. You have changed your primary and secondary sexual characteristics as much as it is medically possible. "Transexual" is absolutely the correct term , nothing wrong with that!
I support and agree with you Maya!!! Love you girl!!!
I really appreciate your perspectives and voice of advocacy. Don't listen to the haters. You be you..... You're an inspiration.
I think probably ultimately as people experiencing extreme marginalisation and discrimination that we should look to the commonalities that bring us together rather than trying to divide ourselves off into smaller groups. The things I have in common with my close trans masc non-binary friend and the support and solidarity we can offer one another is vast just as it is in a different way with the queer cis women in my life.
You know, I could look at you and see you as a north American white girl with a very different cultural expression of femininity and say we’re different and reject commonality and solidarity with you despite us sharing in trans womenhood and other experiences. I just think that would only be a loss and not a gain.
I definitely agree in unifying over our commonalities against forces which seek to destroy us, but also want to acknowledge our difference in experience as it can greatly impact the perception of our queer identities. In certain trans spaces, for instance ones that focus solely on the non-binary & non-medical aspects, a transexual (like myself) can feel so removed from those conversations that ignore the major medical aspects of our journey as a necessity (for transexuals like myself). Which can feel isolating in and of itself. Bonding with others who have gone through similar surgeries has been instrumental, and I'll never have that level of understanding with the enby's and the anti-medical transitioners.
@@MayavhenryI understand that and understand wanting to seek out community there but I don’t understand the need to separate yourself off from the rest of the community to achieve that and I don’t really understand trying to rehabilitate a term that has been wielded against members of the community across the spectrum at various times. It feels kind of like edginess for the sake of edginess. I think like being in public and trying to discuss those unique experiences of being a trans woman and going through physical transition is so hard and uncomfortable with people who haven’t had that and don’t identify with that but I don’t think that’s because of non-binary people existing.
I also think different aspects of being trans and different challenges can be important at different times. I’ve found connections with different kinds of trans and queer people really significant and good at different times. I just think it’s leading with empathy and care. And also it’s about not depriving someone who maybe does identify as non-binary today of your experience and perspective which might help them to understand their needs and access medical transition or not you know?
It did make sense, thank you Maya. You lost me a bit in the middle, because your life experience is so different from my own, but that's why I watch. I am relieved you have returned to these shorter more on-point style of videos. I feel you covered important issues here. I tried to watch your live streams but I am too old to watch a girl putting her make up on an hour and a half. Glad to see you are not just surviving but thriving.
Hello again. I like that you think of yourself as Transsexual. I do too. However, there are others that just don't take action on their anxiety and frustration do to gender dysphoria and would prefer to live without a gender. The umbrella term of transgender is valid in my opinion. There are bad people who want to aforbid people from finding internal peace and happiness. Having a trans community is a safe space and fights these unAmerican laws. I would like to finish with. In your last video about Thailand, I was concerned about being available with guys that could easily take advantage. I think you have to find your way and no one should prevent you except your mom from enjoying life. You are beautiful go for it.
never even thought about myself as a transsexual. especially because in dutch its even more loaded then in english. but now i am considering to start using it aswel for myself. after your vid it makes much more sense in my situation aswel. thank you
My goodness, you are looking extra lovely today, Maya. All the best to you ❤
I am also post-op and like you have reclaimed the term "transsexual" to describe myself. I cannot understand someone who has no bodily or gender dysphoria and no intention of doing anything to transition, other than claiming to be transgender. The transgender community has become so intensely political that, as a result, I no longer attend meetings of the local transgender organization as I feel alienated from it.
If male and female behavior was not so culturally polarized it would be so much easier to have the fluidity of male and female sexuality. All children feel out who and what they are sexually by experimenting with their peers( not, I repeat not adults or much older teenagers). It is through the experimentation without adult judgement and interference does sexuality begin to emerge. When this sexuality is constrained by masculine and feminine constructs, confusion starts to happen. These constructs are so devisive. One has to be male or female and act accordingly. Geez, this is where social acceptence becomes problematic. I feel for men and women who are born discontented with their bodies. I really wish there was a way they could be who they see themselves as without cutting their bodies up and be judged and mocked by a polarized society. Western society is pruient and puritainical at the same time. The result is really, really sad. Homophobic men who are obcessed with anal sex with women and women who wax their pubes to look like little girls but demand respect as women. God/Goddess, help us sort this mess out.
And, Ms. Maya thank you for your thought provoking messages. This is my first time watching you and as a 70 yr. old sort of hetero woman, I am so impressed😊 by your grace.
I use transsex for much the same reason. Transsexual just give me sexuality vibes (homosexual, heterosexual, bisexual) and my gender is not a sexuality (I have a sexuality as well). So, I merged it with intersex to get transsex. Because in my opinion it is much more like I am intersex to the maximum (the point at which it is simply all wrong, as opposed to partially wrong). Also, to avoid the pornography history of the term.
You are walking a difficult path. First you transition and then there are people who agree and people think it is weird. It is an extra hard spot to be at.
It really doesn't matter what others might think. In the end it comes down to how you feel about yourself. Maya seems like a wise person in a confusing situation. It is not easy.
All we can do is try to be the person we want to be. Forget what others might think of you.
I feel like the term transsexual puts the place in your transition in focus and lable people as post op, which I feel like is a personal thing where you are and what you have done for your own happiness.
Maybe it has something to do with being asexual. I don't know about others, but sort of taking focus to if you have physically transitioned people might have ideas about sexuality and again adding sexual to something does tend to add a sexual feel to it.
I'm like. Does it matter where in transition I am? Can't we just cuddle?
That being said I have no problems understanding you using the label for yourself, but that's part of why it doesn't really work for me and I can't shake the feel of it would put a sexuality label when I prefer romantic labels
Sooooo refreshing to discover such intelligent reflections coming out of your beautiful entire, complete, true, integrity prone person!!!
You are amazing! Whoot another Center/left person. Always the far to either sides voices so loud and drowns out those whose views are more nuanced.
I respect you sososo much Maya and I'm glad to know you are confident in yourself today and know what you want to label yourself as. For me personally though I think it's more the opposite. I think transgender makes more sense honestly than transsexual. If we go with the notion that sex ≠ gender than it's important for ME to express that being trans to mean is connected to that. With the fact that I have always been female, but I wasn't always a woman or a girl.
Being trans among such a diverse community and an array of perspectives is so fascinating and it's always intrigued me how many different stories you can hear from 2 different trans girls let alone the millions of us their are around the world. I'm sure things will only get better for the more that we are open and honest about who we are exactly (the same with everyone really!!)
Very thoughtful and well spoken. OK, I accept your point of view.
You look great too
Thank you for making this! You've for the most part been healthily addressing these things. Its true that certain parts of the population who may be resentful or spiteful have politicized those who are trans, when for the most part trans people would transition within a binary. Not to say one cannot be genderfluid, but it is an unfair "speaking for" a group that should not be spoken for, by those who are cis or genderfluid.
I've been saying the same thing ever since the term transgender started to be a thing... Got called transphobic by my local Trans Community, and that was what made me wanting to part ways with my own community! At this point, nothing makes sense we use words to define things, and if something means everything it will inherently also mean nothing at the same time!
I always said having issues with your genitals and not being able to function as a human being because of it is such a different experience from someone who spiritually believes they should transition. Everyone can do whatever they want with their lives, but don't depreciate me for having my own opinion... I NEVER thought I would say this, but it's time to SEGREGATE the shit out of this community, be an individual, not a collective
Ghurl I thought I was the only one that got attacked for calling myself transsexual … I’m like that’s what we was called in the 80’s 90’s. And these new ones saying what we should be calling ourselves. And yes trans kids/ teens were a thing in my day also…
Funny, I agree with you. Well said.
I have never been a part of the LGBTXSQTRVNOMY crowd. I tried a couple times, because I wanted to feel supported, but it never resonated; I was uncomfortable. I transitioned entirely on my own without anyone to sort of talk with; I missed not having that.
Enjoy
Like Maya alluded to in the video, the LGBTQ+ community is more of a political movement and ideology. A very toxic one in my opinion too. But I think more and more people like yourself are just doing their own thing now and just live their life :)
Maya. Right on the mark. You are very clear, and you have to negotiate dangerous waters in society. Besides, you have a perfect right to identify yourself.
Yeah, I agree. I used to think initially, I was non-binary. But upon reflection, I discovered that the masculine expression that I once had was something that I did not choose, and was rather placed upon me via expectations from society and culturally speaking. But now, several years into my transition and practically living stealth, and being a highly desirable woman, as it is, I feel more comfortable and aligned with the term transsexual, as do you. Nothing against the nonbinary community or others by the way. We just aren’t all that same and that’s okay. Best of luck.
I honestly hate the whole labels thing being who I am. I am just me. That's all I want from my existence, I'm always searching for a label, but don't fit perfectly into any of them. This was wonderful to hear Maya. Thank you! Love your dress too by the way, silver is such a cool color 🩶 (they need sparkles on the silver heart IMO)
Amen! A label can never describe a whole person. I'm so much more than my gender and sexuality.
Beautiful. So agree with the sentiments shared in this video about being transsexual. Love this!! 😘😘
Thank you for your openness to educating! Cis person's question, to understand better: Is -gender associated with gender identity (i.e., who a person is) and -sexual associated with sexuality (i.e., who a person loves)?
This is exactly what I think. I'm not transmedicalist (at least not 100%?) nor "tucute" (not 100% also), I believe what makes sense TO ME. And I really hate when either "side" assumes you are "the enemy" just because you either question or don't agree entirely with all of their ideology. The trans community shouldn't have "sides", we are individuals, we have different opinions, let's discuss them with respect and not push them onto others or get mad when someone doesn't agree.
Well said.
I have held true to myself in using the original terminology too. I was leaving comments on different podcasting sites for awhile, attempting to point to the differences between "Transgender" vs. "Transsexual."
You are right.
I could agree that at one point in my transition, that point being, from my time exploring and challenging myself to solve this struggle, of figuring out who I am and what is wrong with me, through to the period I had, living for two years presenting in the gender of a woman; during, and after that period, I realized and confirmed I was a Transsexual woman. Then I had my primary vaginoplasty, which was the best thing I had done to treat my Gender Dysphoria. I really wanted to fit in and be welcomed, as a Transsexual woman, within the womens social culture; I had been, and still am, but this radically disrespectful element from within the Transgender community has and is, threatening to change that.
I identify with the binary of biological male and female; I am different by my male genetic construct, I know this, but I don't broadcast it. My mental illness has and continues to be responding quite well to the medical and psychological treatment I have received.
Oh, I also sacrificed competing in sports; it would be unfair and disrespectful on so many levels; it's part of the cost of transitioning. I will never really be a woman, I am a pseudo-woman; I am just, well, different.
Enjoy and Thank You Young Lady
Biological women who are screaming now about men pretending to be women have a point. I don't entirely agree with some of it and how far they are going to fight back against people like me. I have never intruded into women's spaces; I have shown respect pending being invited in; forced inclusion by regulatory law changes that the Transgender community advocates have imposed on society is obscene. Women who refuse to accept Transgender women into their spaces don't really know the difference that a Transsexual woman presents, and they are strong in their belief that we are phonies, we are not Trans-Women because we cannot change our sex, that we are delusional male transvestites, or gay, or female impersonators who have gone to far, and that we should remain within the male arena and keep our of the female arena; no matter to what extent you have gone to fit in.
You are doing the right thing Maya. You are doing what is best for you and you shouldn't have to answer to anyone else for your decision. ❤
I wish you a Merry Christmas Maya, and hope you and your family gett a happy Hollidays.
I totally agree with your desicion and I also think that you meet the definition for transsexual. I also think that you removing your experience from a political ideology is awesome! Its so rare to see and it just makes you all the more authentic in my book 🎉🎉
While I am not able to surgically transition due to health issues. I feel that Transgender is a good term. However, I do have an issue with people self diagnosising being "Transgender " or "Transexual". Going through all the steps in our journey is not something that should be done light heartedly and self diagnosis is. People should take the time follow the WPATH guidelines and get a diagnosis, mental health is not a game. HRT does have side-effects and must be done in a doctors care. Using a team to help a person in their transition will help the community as a whole.
Totally agree, transexualism is our diagnosis and medical journey for cure and a happy and fulfilled life. A very medical topic that shouldn't be politicized. Thanks for speaking up for us and clarifying :) I am super happy that we have access to the treatment we need and it makes us free and we can live on freely in our true selves. Sending kisses ❤
I totally get what you are saying. My sister is Post-op and wants nothing to do with the "movement" and just wants to be seen as one of the girls and live her life. She isn't stealth but just doesn't care about pushing any agenda.
Yay! The term is precise and exact. You may know that the "transgender" label was coined by an American transvestite male who called himself Virginia Prince who was very dismissive of people born male who wanted to change their body to harmonize with their mind. Transsexual to me means having physical sex dysphoria so severe that the organs in question must be minimized, hidden or fixed. Whereas I encounter people who call themselves transgender while being perfectly happy to keep their male organs. And I can respect their right to their self identity but I could never understand it for myself. Bravo to you! Your presentation is clear and shows understanding and empathy. Bigger fan of you now (always was!). Please keep posting!
Prince did not coin "transgender," only popularized use of the term as distinct from transsexual to refer to those who didn't "fully" transition (she actually did transition and used feminine pronouns BTW). The term was used previously in clinical literature, synonymous w/transsexual but referencing more the cross-identification aspect, vs physical sex. Christine Jorgensen fit the traditional definition of transsexual but from the 70s on used "transgender" to refer to herself, because she felt it was more specific to the core issue of gender identity. Not quibbling over use of the term "transsexual," just correcting a common misunderstanding of the history.
I remember watching you 8 years ago when You and I just started our transition. I am so happy to hear these words coming from you. I didn't agree with most of your opinions, thats why it really is resfresing to hear. I've had pretty much the same experience as you (HRT, SRS, Legal name and sex change). I am more of a right leaning in terms of politics, i have never understood non-binary. I always smelled it would become this ideology. I understand that people are experiencing different mental problems, as I did, yes i suffer from gender dysphoria, it's a condition. I was extremely lucky to be born in Poland where i transitioned at the age of 20 (I am almost 29 now) i live a happy life, no one around me in my work space knows my background, they assume I am a woman. I am really grateful for that. At the same time it doesn't mean that a woman or a man that feels fluid in their gender expression has the same experience as I. It really creates confiusion. We fought so hard to be taken seriously, and now after all those years i fell like this movement is making a mockery out of itselft.
My spouse is non-binary. They've discovered that at 35yo, they are NOT being political NOT ideological. It's sad for me that as people of the LGBTQIA+ community they still have to fight for people to realize they literally exist and are real and valid among their own community that should accept, protect and recognize them...
I hope you'll change your mind on that some day, and congrats on your transition, I hope you can live as your true self and have a very happy life.
@@simplepage Ok, so he/she is a gender non conforming male or female, that's it. They were feminine men and masculine women before the trans movement...No one is denying their existence. I am just saying that, if you SAY you're non-binary and you don't FEEL male/female that doesn't mean you're trans. Having gender dysphoria is extremely hard condition that i don't wish upon anyone. If you live in US/Canada/Europe/Australia you have every right to wear or feel whatever you want, you're extremely priviledged. I don't understand the need to give yourself the victim card" look im non-binary, i struggle..."it's a joke.
The interesting thing is that my spouse does have gender dysphoria and does hrt and laser hair removal. Enby people do have gender dysphoria and I kinda don't know where you get the idea they don't? I agree it's awful and stressful, especially if like my spouse you had that your whole life without knowing why or what it was, just feeling there is something wrong with you but being unable to put words on it and talk about it to people that are your agab (even more so if you're amab I think). They didn't even let me touch their face for years because of how it reminded them they had a "beard" despite being very well shaved every day, and that's only one example. I'm really sorry you had to get through that, but pain shouldn't be a contest, and some trans folx (enby and trans women or men) don't have gender dysphoria or very little. That doesn't mean they are not trans nor does that mean they won't undergo surgery or HRT. Trans means transition, literally. Changing pronouns, name, the way you present yourself and sometimes your whole appearance through medical intervention makes you trans, because you transition from your assigned gender at birth to the gender that feels right for you. I wish you could see that, because my spouse and I would fight for you to have the rights to be seen as the woman you are and live in a world where you don't need to prove you are one and can live without fear. I would also hope you'll do the same for people that are really not that far away from what you are and feel pretty much the same. If you have any questions on this subject I would gladly answer them. If you prefer not to respond that's also your choice. In any case I wish you still a happy and fulfilling life no matter what
@@simplepage No, the whole premise of being a transsexual is having gender dysphoria, that's why you transition to feel more comfortable with your whole body. If you don't feel any discomfort with your secondary sexual characteristics there is no point in transition. And this is the problem with "non-binary", people say i didn't experience dysphoria, but i like presenting masculine and feminine, depends on the mood. Ok, no one is saying you can't, If you live in the West, you have every right to do so but it doesn;t automatically say you are trans. You say your spouse experience dysphoria, is taking HRT, doing lasers, but he is comfortable living as a man, and that is ok, he is not a victim nor i am. If he comes to the realisation that he wants to live as a woman, then do it. I don't understand why people want to feel inferior, victimized. No one cares, what you feel like or look like. I think the biggest point where we would disagree is that i know there are 2 genders (not talking about pathology in genetics or endocrine problems) and you and your spouse probably believe there is more or something in between. No one is making you fight for anything, It's not the 50's or 60's, you can do whatever you want with your life. Your spouse is extremely lucky enough that he won't be stoned for any homosexual and gender bending activity like in the middle east. I am not even going to start with the pronouns they/them etc, it just shows that you want everyone around you to cater towards your emotions "i dont feel comfortable with he/him, she/her" too bad, it's the real world, there are real problems, you can't demand everyone around you to walk on egg shells to avoid misgendering you, if you can't stand the thought that someone will refer to you as he/she, there are bigger problems inside you. Life is hard. Best of luck to you and your spouse!
@@marsellae I'm sorry you have such hatred inside you... I hope one day you'll find peace and stop being negative and saying things deliberately to hurt people. Also you say they don't have any problems while also being the embodiment of what they have to live with everyday and why and what they have to fight against. It's a sad thing seeing someone trans and also transphobic. Since you're disrespecting my spouse I won't interact with you anymore, I can see you are not in the right mental space for this complicate conversation nor being rational right now.
totally agree with you, and it’s sad that people are sending you hate. words mean things, and as you said, if you telling people you’re transgender just makes them confused there’s nothing wrong with using a word that would make it clearer. also, i personally think there’s nothing wrong with acknowledging that someone who has transitioned medically has had a different experience in life than someone who hasn’t. nobody can define who is ‘really’ trans or whatever but there’s nothing wrong with being in your own category of trans that doesn’t always overlap with the rest. labels are used to communicate information, and if the ‘agreed upon’ label isn’t cutting it, why not go back to something that does?
Words or labels can never fully express who we are. the uniqueness of each person is beyond language.
In the mid 70s there were few resources for gender dysphoria. Reading books by transsexuals like Canary Conn set the definitions though very narrow in scope. Mayas use of transsexual for those fully committed to transition is the world I grew up in and makes perfect sense to me. Go Maya.
I 100% agree. Policies for or against Transgender people misrepresent transsexuals in terms od experience and what is good or bad for us. I find this distinction important for health, representation and legislation. I totally resonate with yout statement because changing gender and changing sex are different things.
I really want to go through medical transition but the UK NHS is so bad
If it's what you want, it's what you'll have one day! Sending you love. ❤️
Omg! YES 🙌🏻 I’m so happy to hear you’re literally keeping us Transexuals alive! 😭🥰❣️
I think the same on this subject!
I no longer feel so alone anymore on this! Thank You Maya!
Everybody in these comment sections bring me so much Love knowing they also agree to! 🥲❤️🔥❤️🔥❤️🔥
I totally agree. I see the transition as more of an individual journey rather than a political movement. I am a transsexual lady. When I go to Germany, I am a Trans Frau.