I love this so much! I’m 35 single with no kids and I have to honestly say, I’m more at peace being single than I ever was being in a relationship. It’s complete serene here🥰!
Marriage is a journey, it’s either for you or not for you. Single is a journey, it’s either for you or not for you. An unhappy nightmare marriage is not good at all. Neither is a person who is single, lonely and miserable. Let’s wish all people well.
I’m learning from the Bible that whatever state I am in I will be content. Philippians 4:11…I would love to be married and have children but not enough to compromise a peaceful life. For years the people at church shamed unmarried women but then I read scripture for myself and realized that being unmarried isn’t a curse and God promotes unmarried people just like he promotes married people. My favorite apostle Paul enjoyed his single life even being persecuted
I wish that Dr. Marsh raised awareness on the over 1400 Federal Financial Laws that only benefit married people and financially penalize Single people. Single people pay higher taxes, Singles pay higher rates in ALL insurance polices, higher property taxes by not qualifying for state tax exemptions, higher healthcare costs and discrimination in care, higher housing costs and higher added supplement costs in traveling solo. There are State laws and County laws/policies that also financially penalize Single people. No one should PAY higher taxes or charged penalty rates because they are Single and not willing to betray themselves by staying in a loveless marriage for financial reasons...many do betray themselves because they can't AFFORD to be Single.
I couldn't agree more... That law is probably the reason why so many people get married, "the benefits of marriage" I hate to say it but after all of the misogynistic, controlling, spoiled, selfish, verbally and physically abusive men that I've dealt with, I am very happy to be single.
Have you ever considered WHY? I'll start with the single woman in my own family: because you cost more. My father's side (married or remarried) passes down more wealth than my mother's side (largely single and independent). The majority of the world isn't wealthy, so costs from elderly care to burial gets more expensive when traditional family units aren't in place. Even something as basic as protection, no husband, you are more likely to rely on 911 as opposed to having someone tasked with dying for you in the home. There's also the fact that two incomes, splitting duties in most scenarios is more advantageous
@@nancyt.8799 I'm not from the US, hence the need for clarity. Is it that the Law rewards married ppl and penalizes singles? Or is it that there are just certain benefits given to the married as incentives to build the families that are necessary, that don't apply to singles (because they're not yet building families) and hence an obvious difference in allocation of funds? If one person is given a medal for winning a race, is the other penalized because he didn't get a medal for which he didn't qualify? I did say, I'm seeking clarity, so please take my questions in context. In my country the Gov't does pay Marriage Allowance, which singles certainly will not get, children get free meals in school, financial assistance with school books. There might be other perks for families of which I'm not aware.
ATTN Producers- show idea: "Singlism- Why Single People are taxed more and pay more" - Over 1400 Federal Financial Laws only benefit married people and financially penalize Single people. Single people are financially subsidizing the married people's life style. See Dr. Marsh's published work along with Ph.D. Harvard Social Scientist Dr. Bella De Paulo on "Singlism."
The Bible Destigmatized Singleness (and Marriage) a long time ago. It essentially said, "Both have their pros and cons and each person has his own gift from God. If you're single don't go seeking to not be single because the married have certain responsibilities that singles don't. But rather use your singleness to serve God without distraction, you have the freedom not to divide your attention. And if you're married, love and respect your spouses, don't withold yourself from each other, be fruitful, build your families, love and raise your children well." What it didn't say is, " Use singleness as a cover to sleep around when you don't want commitment (i.e.Marriage) or think that Marriage always makes life easier." You either want the responsibilities that go with the benefits of being single or married or not.
Been engaged 3 times, and each time I just couldn't move forward to marriage. Some type of feeling would come over me and I felt like my life was going to be snatched from me. Last time I was engaged at 37, now in 50s, I told myself "I can't be single forever" and took it a step further and lived with this person. Worse thing I could have done, he became another person -- abusive, drinking way too much, and had the audacity to say "I got you where I wanted you". I felt trapped and sad and would stay late at work because I didn't want to go home. Even though my intuition was telling me "this relationship is not right for you" I continued with it because I was listening to people say "it's better to have somebody than nobody and look at this nice house he bought." I played it off for a while until it got so bad that he tried to choke me one day. I managed to call the police and they locked him up until his friend came to get him out. I had to get a restraining order. While he was in lock down, I got a lot of my belongings and stayed in a hotel until I could get an apartment. It was devastating and basically I had to pull my life back together. To make a long story short, marriages/relationships are not what they're cracked up to appear. People pretend in public, like I did, that everything is just peachy, but behind closed doors it's a different story. A lot of women go back to these type of relationships because they feel scared and helpless like they can't make it on their own. In fact some men will brainwash women to believe they can't make it without them. I say the hell with that, pick yourself up, buy your own home and enjoy spending time by yourself, get some hobbies, and relish in peacefulness while praising the Lord and not having the stress to please or entertain anyone. Always listen to you intuition when you are skeptical. I'm not against marriage, just saying that sometimes being single is a good thing. If you are truly in a fantastic relationship and not pretending to be, then "God bless you."
the interviews are abbreviated and edited to fit into the parameters of this platform- perhaps the original broadcast would give you a more accurate representation of how the actual interview unfolded- in the interim choose to calm down
The notion of a flawless marriage or relationship is a myth. There's no set formula for success; what works for one couple may not work for another. Yet, I've discovered that there's always a way forward, even in the most challenging times. Five years ago, my wife and I encountered significant hurdles in our marriage that nearly led to divorce. Despite the adversity, we managed to weather the storm and emerge from it with our bond renewed and revitalised
There is a lot of sense in what you just said and I hope mine works the same way too, we are currently separated but I can't live without him, I love him so much. wish I can get him back I can do anything to have him back, we have tried therapy amongst other things
It's always difficult to let someone you love go, but in my case I had the help of a spiritual adviser who saved my marriage from collapsing her name is shelly renee white
Tamron is so right about staying with someone because of peer pressure. You can be in a relationship and still be alone. So many people assume that being in a relationship equals happiness, but that’s not automatic. Like Vivica said, just let people live. Single or coupled up, do what’s best for you and what you want…not some pre-determined set of rules that someone who’s not in your skin has laid out.
I'm 45 with no kid's I have totally forgotten how long but I'm ok with it until otherwise being single has Kept me feeling great and staying young but hopefully one day someone special will come along.
I'm embarrassed to say but I have been single all my life! There are reasons why but the main one is because I WILL NOT SETTLE!! I want ONE KING who I can spend the rest of my life with. I am only going to be with ONE MAN and get married ONE TIME!!! My stuff is too priceless. I'm not allowing multiple dudes to hit this! One phenomenal king is enough 🙏🏾🙏🏾
You should do some research; you should understand that you may value making the "one" connection with someone and planning your future with him, but many men are not socialized to view wedding and marriage the same way, and women often find that out the hard way. Also, be sure you understand the culture that your future husband comes from and what his home life was like, because those aspects will have a profound impact on his mindset, even if he verbally says it won't. Example: There are men who say that they will never cheat AND that they hated that their own father cheated on their mother, BUT when they are presented with the same circumstances decades after witnessing the trauma of cheating in their household, they still find it hard to do the right thing or deep inside they don't think it's "manly" to just have one partner. And It's very important to understand that men and women view intimacy quite differently; it's a bonding experience for women, but not so for some men. Watch the movie, Where the Crawdads Sing, where one of the supporting characters was living a double life. You may be saving yourself for your one king, which is wonderful, but walk into relationships "with eyes wide open" and understand that some men, including so-called men of God, may claim to be one way in public, but in private they are someone else. Eyes Wide Open!
We need to be having these conversations A LOT more! That part about how married people aren’t honest or upfront about marriage until after others get married is something I always hated; it’s one of the things I’ve noticed as I’ve aged. My married friends complain so much, yet in the same breath used to or still try to tell me that I should settle down. Only a few of them applaud me for sticking to my own beliefs.
I'm 47 and I love the idea of marriage but the success rate is so low...like 20% (not included unhappily married). The odds are against us in this fallen world. I would rather be single than be stuck with a loveless, abusive man. If I meet a miracle man, and he was full of lovingkindness and God-fearing, and easy to deal with, I would marry. If not, I will live my single life of freedom, live abroad, travel, doing what I love and build great community around me. I may even adopt because one living parent is better than no parent or an abusive household. A loving marriage is great but if that hasn't happened for you, it is not the end of the world!
im 61 australiian dark woman i was single for 28yrs before i met my 69 yr old bf in 2019 my heart was broken before i met him it was my choice to stay single he came out of a relationship too ex wife being unfaithful wasnt looking for love either in 2019 didnt expect anything to happen we become friends was talking to each other for 3 months then boom he asked me on a date he treats me like a princess hes my soulmate be 5 yrs this yr 2024 we,v been together we have tiffs not a full blown arguements nope i feel happy relaxed an content finding love at 56 was the greatest thing i thank God for putting us together i couldnt of asked for a better man i felt like ruth an met my boaz amen hope everyone world wide finds their soulmate i got sick of being single too but thats just me everyone is different amen God bless everyone ☺❤🙏🧔♀👵👴💐🌹🌺🌼🌷
I’ve been single all of my life and I do feel like there is a lot of ignorance out there as to why people are single. Not everyone is single for the same reason and we can live our lives however we choose to. I had a lot of childhood trauma that I had to deal with and I never realized how much it got to me. I felt more comfortable to be alone than to be with someone that might hurt me.
I agree with Carmindy. Workdwide travel, both for work and play has taken me to heights you can't imagine. I may marry some day. If I don't, it was never meant to be. Was engaged, but he passed away. Life goes on.
Thank you for bringing up Foster Care, Abusive/Unfilled marriages. Also, many women cannot have children and many women lose children whether due to pregnancy loss or criminal loss. And spouses do pass away even in their twenties. And let's not forget the number of Women out number Men. Folks will be without simply due to outnumbering. And many parents are not great at parenting either, especially when people are sending death threats to these women. Those folks were parent by someone who possibly failed at parenting. Let people live their lives. Truth be told, happy marriages do not worry about single people. If you are confronting single people abundantly living their lives about why they are not married, then there's a good chance that married person is not happy in their life.
32 and still happily unmarried by choice in an oppressive, misogynistic country like Bangladesh 🇧🇩 Who needs men when I already have 2 cats to accompany me ! ♥️🐈🐈 Marriage and kids are NOT my cup of tea ! 🤷🏻♀️
I would rather be happy and single than to be married and miserable. Unless some day I will find my true match. But I am almost 70 years old so I am not worried about it.
The Civil Rights Act was the Emancipation of Men, it freed Men from the obligation of sharing their resources with women and allowed women to work for themselves. Women's labor force participation rate grew from 34% in 1950 to 60% in 2000.
This interview should have happened many years ago. Marriage is honorable, and it takes work, maturity and selflessness. This interview would have helped with the divorce rate!
Why do we need to take on a mothering role when we aren't even mothers while men don't even have to take on a fathering role even when they are actual fathers?
Exactly! I'm also tired of the "rich auntie" phrase as well. That just implies that women (even childfree) need to always be tied to some motherly duties.
I don’t think people in North America know how to be married (both men and women), because relationship rule is broken here, so people are confused, and eventually get divorced. If you’re not lonely and miserable being single, I think it's better to stay single.
@@saramatthews7159 Don’t assume “friend,” I take friendship seriously. Women have brought this dating disaster down upon themselves. You could have a man, but apparently you don’t want to put in the work.
@Garrett799 yes you're right I'm way too lazy to take on the responsibilities of caring for a man-child. I'd rather spend that time handling myself w/my handy dandy vibrator! 😂 😂 😂
WHAT AM I MISSING OUT ON BECAUSE I CHOOSE TO STAY SINGLE, AND WHAT AM I MISSING BECAUSE I CHOOSE NOT TO BE ATTACHED TO A MAN FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE?….MOST DUDES SAY “YOU’RE GONNA BE LONELY AS HELL”. BUT HERE’S HOW I SEE IT AND SO DOES SO MANY OTHER WOMEN WHO ARE NO LONGER SLEEP WALKING, AND WHO ARE WIDE AWAKE: I’M MISSING OUT ON A WHOLE LOT OF UNPAID LABOR THAT IS RARELY APPRECIATED. COOKING, CLEANING, LAUNDRY, EMOTIONAL LABOR, GIVING BIRTH, CHILDCARE, ETC. NOT TO MENTION WOMEN ARE NOW BRINGING HOME THE BACON AND HELPING TO PAY BILLS. MARRIAGE DOES NOT SERVE WOMEN LIKE IT SERVES MEN. ALONE DOES NOT MEAN LONELY….. MAYBE BACK IN HISTORY IT WASN’T AS BAD, BUT TODAY MARRIAGE IS FOR WOMEN WHO DON’T MIND COMPLICATING THEIR LIVES, AND WHO DON’T REALLY CARE TOO MUCH ABOUT THEIR LIFE OR HEALTH. THESE DAYS WHEN YOU CHEAT AND PASS OUT DISEASES, THERE ARE NO CONSEQUENCES. FOR THOSE WHO CAN MAINTAIN STAYING SINGLE, THEY ARE USUALLY HAPPIER BECAUSE THEY HAVE MORE TIME TO FEEL AND DRAW CLOSER TO GOD AND CHRIST, ALONG WITH TIME TO FOCUS ON BECOMING THE BEST VERSION OF THEMSELVES. I DON’T GET LONELY OR BORED TOO OFTEN BECAUSE I HAVE PASSIONS, HOBBIES, FRIENDS, SOCIAL MEDIA, SUPPORT GROUPS, AND A LONG LINE OF SUPPORTERS. I REALLY DON’T NEED A MAN TO VALIDATE ME OR TO COME AND COMPLICATE MY PEACEFUL LIFE.
I was 4 when I came to that conclusion. I came from an abusive household and my father was horrible to a family of 7. Watch my mom try her whole life to get away from him. She passed at 39. He’s still living. I e dated sone nice guys but didn’t want to sleep with them, get married or have kids. A friend of mine was pressured at 24-25 then had a child at 25.
So couples made through in their 80's married and become acting like teenagers in love. I saw moments like this with my parents and the lion and winter side 😂 back and forth, life different when you lose your parents, something changes in your soul , you never stop missing them,then you finally learn and understand the lessons they were trying to teach you
And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. Genesis 2:18 and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. Mark 10:8 Marriage is a refinement of your spirit, you should be in a relationship with someone that helps you GROW on your journey through life. “That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh." - Genesis 2:24
You quote the bible to these women but most probably they sleep around and claim that they are happy to be single. These women are very selfish and our Father doesn’t have a place in their lives.
Relationships is better then being single. The goal is to find someone compatible. But we are not in control of others. We cant control people decision. Good luck in the game.
Folks need to worry about raising their rude ill-mannered children before telling others what to do. Can we at least get the existing people on earth to wipe their pee drops off the toilet when they are done. And wash their hands.
Yeah, I'm older and things change. I'm glad I didn't have children, I don't think I would be a good Mother. Later in life things change with friends and you don't have anyone to call on... You have to have a good spiritual connection.
It’s probably a good idea to not base having kids off of having someone to take care of you when you’re old. It’s really much more difficult than people think. Even you have kids, you should have a plan for your elderly care that can still give them a chance to live their lives and take care of their own children.
It wasn't until recently that women had the choice not to marry and not to have kids. Up until a few decades ago, women had to marry and have kids right away. If no man wanted you, you were labeled an "old maid." Women were to stay at home and raise the children. There were no such things as women working outside the house like men did. Women couldn't even have their own bank account. Marriage was a transaction to benefit men, and a lot of modern men want this type of relationship with a woman today. They lament they want a woman like their mom or grandmothers, not realizing those women in their lives were often abused, trapped, unhappy. But, because women were sold the story of romantic love, many of us think it's real and see men as romantic partners, something most are incapable of being.
Depends on what you want. If you're a traditional woman and want a traditional man, HE approaches. I'm traditional, old school. I appreciate the alpha male. But that's not for everyone. I knew a couple where she clearly wore the pants, and he was effeminate. They were so good together.
When human population is at 1000, it is understandable they want to populate. But at today's 8.2 bil, the air is not fresh, the water is chemicals, the food lost its nutrients, and it is saddening to keep hearing society's view that people should still get married and have kids. A person is always a single journey, nobody else but you can feel your own pain, happiness, sadness.
Weird that the glorifying of these never explains the full picture to the people that have to deal with the consequences. Ive had to deal with the cleanup of "singles" who have expired. Especially when dealing with morhers, grandmothers and aunts, there is zero glory in this. Death is so ugly and yet im hearing these ladies forget the down the line portion. Having to comfort grieving relatives that find out the hard way mom had a stroke or heart attack and died alone, that absolutely brutal. Please stop promoting this, its fun when your able bodied and even then not really
What’s weird about it? Everybody dies alone….and let’s be real way more men, “die alone” and you know it. These guys have no friends; children; wives or girlfriends. Many of these guys have abused, flat out abandoned or neglected their friends and families…don’t take relationships seriously, even when they have been in relationships for years, but never marry or commit. I see it everyday…..yes, some single women don’t have anyone, but far more have family, children and friends that visit/live with them…..
So you goal in life is giving up children for your looks and spending on pleasure like a good consumer. You have a job to afford the self soothing you need to combat the emptiness. And you want a trophy? Oh and a man, or should I say men? Because at 53 years old you had plenty time to find one. There is no such thing as single by choice, because if you could attract your dream man you'd be with him. You have to tell yourself all that to cope. And you have to cope because of your entitlement, sorry I mean your standards. Which I'm sure are as rational as mine; a small harem of bikini models. See that's why I'm single, because the laws in my country don't allow harems. So it's not my fault, and I can't fix it.
A lot of this is just pure talk We were made to partners Even if it as not yet happened...that is the ULTIMATE we weren't made To be single and we all Know YOU'RE not happy.
Such hypocrites... For the last couple of years, I have been hearing women criticize the "MGTOW - Men Going Their Own Way." Man says it: name calling, ad hominem attack, insults... woman says it: thunderous applause.
Trust, some married women would trade their lives to live Vivica's and Carmindy's lives. However, childless elderly women need to consider that they will eventually need someone to entrust with their health and finances.
They can always find a friend or family member or attorney to be their power of attorney and health care proxy or put it a trust or will it out to foundations near and dear to their hearts. They can also make a living will or set up advanced directives. That's why people have life insurance.
Your children aren't your life insurance policy. They don't owe you anything and most people in nursing homes have children and grandchildren that don't see them. Why isn't this messaged push to ageing men?
It's all about building community whether they are blood relatives or not. You can't rely on children. Many parents outlive their kids or their kids live elsewhere or are estranged.
@@valm.5243Yes, I know people from all three scenarios. A mom recently buried her child because of an illness. A mother who’s on one coast and her child’s on the other coast. And a mother who is estranged from her child. It’s a constant reminder that nothing is guaranteed in this life except the fact that you will leave this earth one day. Not to sound like gloom and doom because there is hope in Jesus Christ (if you(anyone) are a believer) and I have to remind myself to take one day at a time and trust God and lean not on my own understanding.
Tamrons fake positivity gets annoying at times. Like it's cool to be interested in your guests but calm down for goodness sake. She's too busy trying to be everyone's cheerleader.
That’s so untrueeeee! Men in their 30s and 40s are considered in their prime because normally by this age they are already stable financially but still don’t look old. So they are highly desirable. Unless he’s got no money, career, only watches Netflix and play video games; yes he’s an incel. Single men are not judged by age; they’re judged by their success, charisma, and height. Men and women have different challenges.
I’m happily Single 🩷 My own home and Paid it off I am in Love with Me My accomplishments No man saying I not good enough Not pretty Not smart No Way because 🩷 I am smart Beautiful intelligent Lovely wonderful with all My accomplishments and milestones with more to come 🩷
I would rather be happy and single than to be married and miserable. Unless some day I will find my true match. But I am almost 70 years old so I am not worried about it.
I love this so much! I’m 35 single with no kids and I have to honestly say, I’m more at peace being single than I ever was being in a relationship. It’s complete serene here🥰!
Me too i'm so zen being single.
Cap
@@singingchef23 Jealous much!
@@alleykatt6110 not at all, a man being by himself is much different than a woman being by herself.
@@Ranger1991 And of course leave it to a “man” to think that he can speak on the mindset and decision of a woman who prefers to be alone…… 😏
Marriage is a journey, it’s either for you or not for you. Single is a journey, it’s either for you or not for you. An unhappy nightmare marriage is not good at all. Neither is a person who is single, lonely and miserable. Let’s wish all people well.
Say that again!
U said the truth. I dont understand where all this single vs. marriage especially comin from singles.
I'm not miserable cause of I'm single. I happier cause I'm single. I don't have to have a man. I do need a job
I’m learning from the Bible that whatever state I am in I will be content. Philippians 4:11…I would love to be married and have children but not enough to compromise a peaceful life. For years the people at church shamed unmarried women but then I read scripture for myself and realized that being unmarried isn’t a curse and God promotes unmarried people just like he promotes married people. My favorite apostle Paul enjoyed his single life even being persecuted
Exactly 💯 A lot of married people are resigned and cynical and unhappy in their situation, which is why they hate on singles 😅😂
What married people have you ever seen hate on single people?
@@singingchef23Lots because of the freedom that we have
@@singingchef23Such a bitter hctib….. life not what you hoped? 😢 boo whoo!
@@singingchef23You for one! 😂
@@kmurray559 What, a sad, unfulfilled, and lonely existence?
I LOVE being single ❤ hassle-free and peaceful ✌️
Being married is only a hassle if with the wrong person
No in-laws 😂disturbing your peace.
Why are men shamed for being single but not vice versa?
@@mrbrave29 Men are never shamed for being single, women are shamed all the time. 😐😑
@@keturaequalizer I disagree. It is vice versa.
I wish that Dr. Marsh raised awareness on the over 1400 Federal Financial Laws that only benefit married people and financially penalize Single people. Single people pay higher taxes, Singles pay higher rates in ALL insurance polices, higher property taxes by not qualifying for state tax exemptions, higher healthcare costs and discrimination in care, higher housing costs and higher added supplement costs in traveling solo. There are State laws and County laws/policies that also financially penalize Single people. No one should PAY higher taxes or charged penalty rates because they are Single and not willing to betray themselves by staying in a loveless marriage for financial reasons...many do betray themselves because they can't AFFORD to be Single.
I couldn't agree more...
That law is probably the reason why so many people get married, "the benefits of marriage" I hate to say it but after all of the misogynistic, controlling, spoiled, selfish, verbally and physically abusive men that I've dealt with, I am very happy to be single.
Finally someone who shares my same thoughts. I've been saying this for a while now.
Have you ever considered WHY? I'll start with the single woman in my own family: because you cost more. My father's side (married or remarried) passes down more wealth than my mother's side (largely single and independent). The majority of the world isn't wealthy, so costs from elderly care to burial gets more expensive when traditional family units aren't in place. Even something as basic as protection, no husband, you are more likely to rely on 911 as opposed to having someone tasked with dying for you in the home. There's also the fact that two incomes, splitting duties in most scenarios is more advantageous
@@nancyt.8799 I'm not from the US, hence the need for clarity. Is it that the Law rewards married ppl and penalizes singles? Or is it that there are just certain benefits given to the married as incentives to build the families that are necessary, that don't apply to singles (because they're not yet building families) and hence an obvious difference in allocation of funds? If one person is given a medal for winning a race, is the other penalized because he didn't get a medal for which he didn't qualify? I did say, I'm seeking clarity, so please take my questions in context.
In my country the Gov't does pay Marriage Allowance, which singles certainly will not get, children get free meals in school, financial assistance with school books. There might be other perks for families of which I'm not aware.
Read the book! She talks about it!
ATTN Producers- show idea: "Singlism- Why Single People are taxed more and pay more" - Over 1400 Federal Financial Laws only benefit married people and financially penalize Single people. Single people are financially subsidizing the married people's life style. See Dr. Marsh's published work along with Ph.D. Harvard Social Scientist Dr. Bella De Paulo on "Singlism."
The Bible Destigmatized Singleness (and Marriage) a long time ago. It essentially said, "Both have their pros and cons and each person has his own gift from God. If you're single don't go seeking to not be single because the married have certain responsibilities that singles don't. But rather use your singleness to serve God without distraction, you have the freedom not to divide your attention. And if you're married, love and respect your spouses, don't withold yourself from each other, be fruitful, build your families, love and raise your children well."
What it didn't say is, " Use singleness as a cover to sleep around when you don't want commitment (i.e.Marriage) or think that Marriage always makes life easier." You either want the responsibilities that go with the benefits of being single or married or not.
Single, Dominican-American, childless woman...I NEEDED to hear this! Than you.
Been engaged 3 times, and each time I just couldn't move forward to marriage. Some type of feeling would come over me and I felt like my life was going to be snatched from me. Last time I was engaged at 37, now in 50s, I told myself "I can't be single forever" and took it a step further and lived with this person. Worse thing I could have done, he became another person -- abusive, drinking way too much, and had the audacity to say "I got you where I wanted you". I felt trapped and sad and would stay late at work because I didn't want to go home. Even though my intuition was telling me "this relationship is not right for you" I continued with it because I was listening to people say "it's better to have somebody than nobody and look at this nice house he bought."
I played it off for a while until it got so bad that he tried to choke me one day. I managed to call the police and they locked him up until his friend came to get him out. I had to get a restraining order. While he was in lock down, I got a lot of my belongings and stayed in a hotel until I could get an apartment. It was devastating and basically I had to pull my life back together. To make a long story short, marriages/relationships are not what they're cracked up to appear. People pretend in public, like I did, that everything is just peachy, but behind closed doors it's a different story. A lot of women go back to these type of relationships because they feel scared and helpless like they can't make it on their own. In fact some men will brainwash women to believe they can't make it without them. I say the hell with that, pick yourself up, buy your own home and enjoy spending time by yourself, get some hobbies, and relish in peacefulness while praising the Lord and not having the stress to please or entertain anyone. Always listen to you intuition when you are skeptical. I'm not against marriage, just saying that sometimes being single is a good thing. If you are truly in a fantastic relationship and not pretending to be, then "God bless you."
PLEASE Tamron stop cutting people off. It happens so much!
the interviews are abbreviated and edited to fit into the parameters of this platform- perhaps the original broadcast would give you a more accurate representation of how the actual interview unfolded- in the interim choose to calm down
The notion of a flawless marriage or relationship is a myth. There's no set formula for success; what works for one couple may not work for another. Yet, I've discovered that there's always a way forward, even in the most challenging times. Five years ago, my wife and I encountered significant hurdles in our marriage that nearly led to divorce. Despite the adversity, we managed to weather the storm and emerge from it with our bond renewed and revitalised
There is a lot of sense in what you just said and I hope mine works the same way too, we are currently separated but I can't live without him, I love him so much. wish I can get him back I can do anything to have him back, we have tried therapy amongst other things
It's always difficult to let someone you love go, but in my case I had the help of a spiritual adviser who saved my marriage from collapsing her name is shelly renee white
This is helpful, I will look her up online right now...Thanks.
You won't regret it
Tamron is so right about staying with someone because of peer pressure. You can be in a relationship and still be alone. So many people assume that being in a relationship equals happiness, but that’s not automatic. Like Vivica said, just let people live. Single or coupled up, do what’s best for you and what you want…not some pre-determined set of rules that someone who’s not in your skin has laid out.
Stay single
Nothing wrong with being single .
Marriage isn’t for everyone!!!
Just like having children isn't for everyone either.
@@lunairis570💯
I'm 45 with no kid's I have totally forgotten how long but I'm ok with it until otherwise being single has Kept me feeling great and staying young but hopefully one day someone special will come along.
Yep
People let society push them into toxic bad marriages. Live your truth❤
Amazing 60 and single 🎉
Single and loving it❤
I'm embarrassed to say but I have been single all my life! There are reasons why but the main one is because I WILL NOT SETTLE!! I want ONE KING who I can spend the rest of my life with. I am only going to be with ONE MAN and get married ONE TIME!!! My stuff is too priceless. I'm not allowing multiple dudes to hit this! One phenomenal king is enough 🙏🏾🙏🏾
You should do some research; you should understand that you may value making the "one" connection with someone and planning your future with him, but many men are not socialized to view wedding and marriage the same way, and women often find that out the hard way. Also, be sure you understand the culture that your future husband comes from and what his home life was like, because those aspects will have a profound impact on his mindset, even if he verbally says it won't. Example: There are men who say that they will never cheat AND that they hated that their own father cheated on their mother, BUT when they are presented with the same circumstances decades after witnessing the trauma of cheating in their household, they still find it hard to do the right thing or deep inside they don't think it's "manly" to just have one partner. And It's very important to understand that men and women view intimacy quite differently; it's a bonding experience for women, but not so for some men. Watch the movie, Where the Crawdads Sing, where one of the supporting characters was living a double life. You may be saving yourself for your one king, which is wonderful, but walk into relationships "with eyes wide open" and understand that some men, including so-called men of God, may claim to be one way in public, but in private they are someone else. Eyes Wide Open!
@@Ava2969ny I didn't read your comment but K 💯
Keep holding on!!
@@Ava2969nyThis is excellent advice. A lot of women don’t realize this stuff until it’s too late.
We need to be having these conversations A LOT more!
That part about how married people aren’t honest or upfront about marriage until after others get married is something I always hated; it’s one of the things I’ve noticed as I’ve aged. My married friends complain so much, yet in the same breath used to or still try to tell me that I should settle down. Only a few of them applaud me for sticking to my own beliefs.
Excellent and thanks for sharing
Great conversation!❤❤
Thank you Tamron for capturing this! This subject is rarely talked about.😊
"Society pressure, that's the right word!❤❤
I'm 47 and I love the idea of marriage but the success rate is so low...like 20% (not included unhappily married). The odds are against us in this fallen world. I would rather be single than be stuck with a loveless, abusive man. If I meet a miracle man, and he was full of lovingkindness and God-fearing, and easy to deal with, I would marry. If not, I will live my single life of freedom, live abroad, travel, doing what I love and build great community around me. I may even adopt because one living parent is better than no parent or an abusive household. A loving marriage is great but if that hasn't happened for you, it is not the end of the world!
We love your show tamron hall
im 61 australiian dark woman i was single for 28yrs before i met my 69 yr old bf in 2019 my heart was broken before i met him it was my choice to stay single he came out of a relationship too ex wife being unfaithful wasnt looking for love either in 2019 didnt expect anything to happen we become friends was talking to each other for 3 months then boom he asked me on a date he treats me like a princess hes my soulmate be 5 yrs this yr 2024 we,v been together we have tiffs not a full blown arguements nope i feel happy relaxed an content finding love at 56 was the greatest thing i thank God for putting us together i couldnt of asked for a better man i felt like ruth an met my boaz amen hope everyone world wide finds their soulmate i got sick of being single too but thats just me everyone is different amen God bless everyone ☺❤🙏🧔♀👵👴💐🌹🌺🌼🌷
They look beautiful and their energy is up up up
I’ve been single all of my life and I do feel like there is a lot of ignorance out there as to why people are single. Not everyone is single for the same reason and we can live our lives however we choose to. I had a lot of childhood trauma that I had to deal with and I never realized how much it got to me. I felt more comfortable to be alone than to be with someone that might hurt me.
I agree with Carmindy. Workdwide travel, both for work and play has taken me to heights you can't imagine. I may marry some day. If I don't, it was never meant to be. Was engaged, but he passed away. Life goes on.
Oh Carmindy. I love her so much from WNTW.
Me too!! I loved that show
Ladies live your best life no matter what it looks like.
Thank You.😇🍓
Thank you for bringing up Foster Care, Abusive/Unfilled marriages. Also, many women cannot have children and many women lose children whether due to pregnancy loss or criminal loss. And spouses do pass away even in their twenties. And let's not forget the number of Women out number Men. Folks will be without simply due to outnumbering. And many parents are not great at parenting either, especially when people are sending death threats to these women. Those folks were parent by someone who possibly failed at parenting. Let people live their lives. Truth be told, happy marriages do not worry about single people. If you are confronting single people abundantly living their lives about why they are not married, then there's a good chance that married person is not happy in their life.
32 and still happily unmarried by choice in an oppressive, misogynistic country like Bangladesh 🇧🇩
Who needs men when I already have 2 cats to accompany me ! ♥️🐈🐈
Marriage and kids are NOT my cup of tea ! 🤷🏻♀️
I would rather be happy and single than to be married and miserable. Unless some day I will find my true match. But I am almost 70 years old so I am not worried about it.
I so understand Tamron about dating someone you now despise, and you can't get out bc u are afraid of friends scrutiny 😢
The Civil Rights Act was the Emancipation of Men, it freed Men from the obligation of sharing their resources with women and allowed women to work for themselves.
Women's labor force participation rate grew from 34% in 1950 to 60% in 2000.
Women where working raising children and doing things in the house not by our choice though, but women’s labour was and still isn’t valued
"Single at Heart" a book I recently discovered, describes me perfectly.
This interview should have happened many years ago. Marriage is honorable, and it takes work, maturity and selflessness. This interview would have helped with the divorce rate!
Great interview my beautiful cousin Kris.
Why do we need to take on a mothering role when we aren't even mothers while men don't even have to take on a fathering role even when they are actual fathers?
Exactly! I'm also tired of the "rich auntie" phrase as well. That just implies that women (even childfree) need to always be tied to some motherly duties.
I don’t think people in North America know how to be married (both men and women), because relationship rule is broken here, so people are confused, and eventually get divorced. If you’re not lonely and miserable being single, I think it's better to stay single.
Ladies, go do yourselves
I did myself early this morning...had the greatest time!
@@saramatthews7159That’s just sad .. and repulsive.
@@Ranger1991 Nothing sad about it friend! It's actually quite fun!
@@saramatthews7159 Don’t assume “friend,” I take friendship seriously. Women have brought this dating disaster down upon themselves. You could have a man, but apparently you don’t want to put in the work.
@Garrett799 yes you're right I'm way too lazy to take on the responsibilities of caring for a man-child. I'd rather spend that time handling myself w/my handy dandy vibrator! 😂 😂 😂
WHAT AM I MISSING OUT ON BECAUSE I CHOOSE TO STAY SINGLE, AND WHAT AM I MISSING BECAUSE I CHOOSE NOT TO BE ATTACHED TO A MAN FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE?….MOST DUDES SAY “YOU’RE GONNA BE LONELY AS HELL”. BUT HERE’S HOW I SEE IT AND SO DOES SO MANY OTHER WOMEN WHO ARE NO LONGER SLEEP WALKING, AND WHO ARE WIDE AWAKE:
I’M MISSING OUT ON A WHOLE LOT OF UNPAID LABOR THAT IS RARELY APPRECIATED. COOKING, CLEANING, LAUNDRY, EMOTIONAL LABOR, GIVING BIRTH, CHILDCARE, ETC. NOT TO MENTION WOMEN ARE NOW BRINGING HOME THE BACON AND HELPING TO PAY BILLS. MARRIAGE DOES NOT SERVE WOMEN LIKE IT SERVES MEN.
ALONE DOES NOT MEAN LONELY….. MAYBE BACK IN HISTORY IT WASN’T AS BAD, BUT TODAY MARRIAGE IS FOR WOMEN WHO DON’T MIND COMPLICATING THEIR LIVES, AND WHO DON’T REALLY CARE TOO MUCH ABOUT THEIR LIFE OR HEALTH. THESE DAYS WHEN YOU CHEAT AND PASS OUT DISEASES, THERE ARE NO CONSEQUENCES. FOR THOSE WHO CAN MAINTAIN STAYING SINGLE, THEY ARE USUALLY HAPPIER BECAUSE THEY HAVE MORE TIME TO FEEL AND DRAW CLOSER TO GOD AND CHRIST, ALONG WITH TIME TO FOCUS ON BECOMING THE BEST VERSION OF THEMSELVES. I DON’T GET LONELY OR BORED TOO OFTEN BECAUSE I HAVE PASSIONS, HOBBIES, FRIENDS, SOCIAL MEDIA, SUPPORT GROUPS, AND A LONG LINE OF SUPPORTERS. I REALLY DON’T NEED A MAN TO VALIDATE ME OR TO COME AND COMPLICATE MY PEACEFUL LIFE.
Loose the caps lock. You sound very selfish. I don’t think you really love God and have understood that He wants from us in the Bible.
I was 4 when I came to that conclusion. I came from an abusive household and my father was horrible to a family of 7. Watch my mom try her whole life to get away from him. She passed at 39. He’s still living. I e dated sone nice guys but didn’t want to sleep with them, get married or have kids. A friend of mine was pressured at 24-25 then had a child at 25.
I'm 37 single no kids and I love it BUT I have been shamed so bad especially by co workers or certain family members but God is good he keeps me.going
So couples made through in their 80's married and become acting like teenagers in love. I saw moments like this with my parents and the lion and winter side 😂 back and forth, life different when you lose your parents, something changes in your soul , you never stop missing them,then you finally learn and understand the lessons they were trying to teach you
There are plenty of things that make us better people, children being just one of them
And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him. Genesis 2:18
and the two shall become one flesh.’ So they are no longer two but one flesh. Mark 10:8
Marriage is a refinement of your spirit, you should be in a relationship with someone that helps you GROW on your journey through life.
“That is why a man leaves his father and mother and is united to his wife, and they become one flesh." - Genesis 2:24
You quote the bible to these women but most probably they sleep around and claim that they are happy to be single. These women are very selfish and our Father doesn’t have a place in their lives.
The people who need external validation are the ones who truly are unhappy single.
Good for you
Even in the age of feminism, asking a guy out on a date is not viewed favorably in some cultures.
Dr Marsh is on point.
Relationships is better then being single. The goal is to find someone compatible. But we are not in control of others. We cant control people decision. Good luck in the game.
😂😂😂😂😂😂 typical male response
You're a male...of course you're going to say this!
Folks need to worry about raising their rude ill-mannered children before telling others what to do. Can we at least get the existing people on earth to wipe their pee drops off the toilet when they are done. And wash their hands.
😂😂😂
Glad not to have children but worry a bit when I am old and less healthy as a single too.
Agree, 56 and never married and no kids Again, are we being pressured?
Majority of people in nursing homes have children. What's your point ? Having children isn't a life insurance policy.
Yeah, I'm older and things change. I'm glad I didn't have children, I don't think I would be a good Mother. Later in life things change with friends and you don't have anyone to call on... You have to have a good spiritual connection.
@@KeshaNance Very true. Nothing is guaranteed.
It’s probably a good idea to not base having kids off of having someone to take care of you when you’re old. It’s really much more difficult than people think. Even you have kids, you should have a plan for your elderly care that can still give them a chance to live their lives and take care of their own children.
Yes, a lot of women are single by circumstances.
Please know that all childless and single women haven’t had abortions either.
How do you know?
It wasn't until recently that women had the choice not to marry and not to have kids. Up until a few decades ago, women had to marry and have kids right away. If no man wanted you, you were labeled an "old maid." Women were to stay at home and raise the children. There were no such things as women working outside the house like men did. Women couldn't even have their own bank account. Marriage was a transaction to benefit men, and a lot of modern men want this type of relationship with a woman today. They lament they want a woman like their mom or grandmothers, not realizing those women in their lives were often abused, trapped, unhappy. But, because women were sold the story of romantic love, many of us think it's real and see men as romantic partners, something most are incapable of being.
So true.
Yea I was single for years …. Until 31 years old now engaged until 32
Depends on what you want. If you're a traditional woman and want a traditional man, HE approaches. I'm traditional, old school. I appreciate the alpha male. But that's not for everyone. I knew a couple where she clearly wore the pants, and he was effeminate. They were so good together.
Stay single and when you retire you'll have your parents taking care of you 😂
When human population is at 1000, it is understandable they want to populate. But at today's 8.2 bil, the air is not fresh, the water is chemicals, the food lost its nutrients, and it is saddening to keep hearing society's view that people should still get married and have kids. A person is always a single journey, nobody else but you can feel your own pain, happiness, sadness.
If she met the right man then she would marry him.
Dating men is like buying lottery tickets, most are losers
Weird that the glorifying of these never explains the full picture to the people that have to deal with the consequences. Ive had to deal with the cleanup of "singles" who have expired. Especially when dealing with morhers, grandmothers and aunts, there is zero glory in this. Death is so ugly and yet im hearing these ladies forget the down the line portion. Having to comfort grieving relatives that find out the hard way mom had a stroke or heart attack and died alone, that absolutely brutal. Please stop promoting this, its fun when your able bodied and even then not really
What’s weird about it? Everybody dies alone….and let’s be real way more men, “die alone” and you know it. These guys have no friends; children; wives or girlfriends. Many of these guys have abused, flat out abandoned or neglected their friends and families…don’t take relationships seriously, even when they have been in relationships for years, but never marry or commit. I see it everyday…..yes, some single women don’t have anyone, but far more have family, children and friends that visit/live with them…..
Single by choice or Man that you want are not love you back.....
So are they single and celibacy , or flower power getting down,
Many are celibate, some aren't.
Nice one, really love the subject , a lot of judgemental attitude all over the place
@jdstep97 I agree 100% Tamron should allow people to speak & stop interjecting it's rude & annoying😮
❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤❤
So you goal in life is giving up children for your looks and spending on pleasure like a good consumer. You have a job to afford the self soothing you need to combat the emptiness. And you want a trophy? Oh and a man, or should I say men? Because at 53 years old you had plenty time to find one. There is no such thing as single by choice, because if you could attract your dream man you'd be with him. You have to tell yourself all that to cope. And you have to cope because of your entitlement, sorry I mean your standards. Which I'm sure are as rational as mine; a small harem of bikini models. See that's why I'm single, because the laws in my country don't allow harems. So it's not my fault, and I can't fix it.
Ummm...we're not ashamed...duh
I like watching Tamron but sometimes she talks over her guests a little too much. Let them talk.
😊 duLulu is the soLulu
I’m a Anntie
A lot of this is just pure talk We were made to partners Even if it as not yet happened...that is the ULTIMATE we weren't made To be single and we all Know YOU'RE not happy.
So she’s an incel…
So shut up about no men are appraching aka walking ATM
Such hypocrites... For the last couple of years, I have been hearing women criticize the "MGTOW - Men Going Their Own Way."
Man says it: name calling, ad hominem attack, insults... woman says it: thunderous applause.
Trust, some married women would trade their lives to live Vivica's and Carmindy's lives. However, childless elderly women need to consider that they will eventually need someone to entrust with their health and finances.
They can always find a friend or family member or attorney to be their power of attorney and health care proxy or put it a trust or will it out to foundations near and dear to their hearts.
They can also make a living will or set up advanced directives. That's why people have life insurance.
Your children aren't your life insurance policy. They don't owe you anything and most people in nursing homes have children and grandchildren that don't see them. Why isn't this messaged push to ageing men?
No guarantee your children will take care of you...
It's all about building community whether they are blood relatives or not. You can't rely on children. Many parents outlive their kids or their kids live elsewhere or are estranged.
@@valm.5243Yes, I know people from all three scenarios. A mom recently buried her child because of an illness. A mother who’s on one coast and her child’s on the other coast. And a mother who is estranged from her child. It’s a constant reminder that nothing is guaranteed in this life except the fact that you will leave this earth one day. Not to sound like gloom and doom because there is hope in Jesus Christ (if you(anyone) are a believer) and I have to remind myself to take one day at a time and trust God and lean not on my own understanding.
Tamrons fake positivity gets annoying at times. Like it's cool to be interested in your guests but calm down for goodness sake. She's too busy trying to be everyone's cheerleader.
You are 53 lady, you cant have kids lol wow the level cope is strong with this one.
January six never forget 🔵🔵💙 vote..
Single men get shamed WAY more . If a man is 40 single and childless people call him "incel".
Stop acting like it's only women who get judged.
Nope, men are congratulated. Women are called spinsters.
Good point!
That’s not true, they call him a bachelor and you don’t even know the definition of Incel
That’s so untrueeeee! Men in their 30s and 40s are considered in their prime because normally by this age they are already stable financially but still don’t look old. So they are highly desirable. Unless he’s got no money, career, only watches Netflix and play video games; yes he’s an incel. Single men are not judged by age; they’re judged by their success, charisma, and height. Men and women have different challenges.
@@danidiaz2377 lies. They call them INCELS now!!
I’m happily Single 🩷
My own home and
Paid it off
I am in Love with Me
My accomplishments
No man saying
I not good enough
Not pretty
Not smart
No Way because
🩷
I am smart Beautiful intelligent Lovely wonderful with all My accomplishments and milestones with more to come 🩷
I would rather be happy and single than to be married and miserable. Unless some day I will find my true match. But I am almost 70 years old so I am not worried about it.