MM's will see everything in a wrong vs right context. Also very critical. Thats a great way to figure out what ur dealing with. Good managers are adaptable and flexible, they want you to make your own decisions, and grow from them.
I love this, just found a new job away from a micromanager who always told me she didn’t want to micromanage me. Sure Jan. I always came with receipts and her ppl above her who had my back
I have a micromanaging boss, &;to me it looks like an anxiety disorder. I don't have the time, or energy to bear the brunt of other people's mental illness, so I won't be staying there. The team has a high turnover because of her, and is only full of older women who need to stay in one place because of their age.
My workplace condition exact like you. I think i will be a pioneer of high turnover because someone who micromanages me is brand new. i wonder how high will the employee turnover is after i quit.
My boss is like yours except he uses his position to dangle their job security in front of people everytime they make small mistakes...this really f'ed me up mentally
Same here, all the people in my team (7) left in less than a year since I joined and now I feel like leaving too. My manager is obviously still there even though she is responsible for that and in the last two months she started to micromanage me like hell. She take me into 1h meetings over minor things with no business impact almost every week.
Great video!! My former boss was a workaholic micromanager. She had no personal life and worked every day from 5 Am till 11 pm. Weekends and Holidays included. I was supposed to be the PR manager for a non profit but I ended up feeling like a ghostwriter since everything had to get my boss’s and the president’s seals of approval: from a 180 character tweet to a Facebook status, or a letter (simply meant to thank someone or another organization). When I first started, I didn’t get a change over from anyone- everything was dumped on my desk during my first week in the office with very little explanation. I remember being in my 3rd week and Boss sent me a very rude email telling me I should be doing more work at this point - on my 3rd week on a new job. She would never detail what she wanted work wise and never give feedback. So finally two months ago, after a year of being gaslighted, micromanaged, manipulated, I hand my resignation letter. Farewell dtupid hitch.
So sorry you had to deal with that.. BUT very happy you’re moving on! The biggest victory you can have after dealing with a bad boss is being happy and moving forward. Glad you found the video helpful!
Find your micromanager's Achilles heel. If they like to spend an inordinate amount of time going over your work and what you do, keep them busy. Overperform and don't let up. Swanp them with reports and paperwork and things to approve. After a while, they'll burn out and leave you alone.
From the title, I'm already thinking, "there's no working WITH a micromanager," when they just want a slave and zero pushback. I've had micromanagers that wanted to take control to a personal level - "you need to speak this way and think this way" - constantly correcting subjective word use and tone rather than actually focusing on the real details related to a project - trying to change their employee's personalities and typically having a turnover rate specifically related to their unsustainable management style. Micromanaging doesn't allow trust and perhaps isn't actually interested in trust of developing autonomy in workers, just execution of commands. 7:42 spot on, I agree - nudging and guiding has been the most effective and revealing approach in my experience. Confrontation just sets off their defenses over listening "no....I've never tried to micromanage you....oh and can I ask you to not make up accusations, please - thank you" 😂. I've realized it's totally ok to just accept some are insecure, primarily their own business, and that our more authentic self-management and respect must remain adventurous to keep networking for a more sustainable fit for us, not just unsustainably self-sacrificing and catering to toxic environments.
Sometimes there's nothing the employee can do. "Managing Up" can work as a temporary measure, but the onus to change the behaviour should be on the manager and company. It's easy for people to find other/better jobs. Tips for dealing with them are like bandaids until ycu find a normal job again (where you are able to actually do the work you are compensated for)
My boss micromanages to the insane extreme. For example: She will check the christmas cards we mail out to patients. She. Checks. Every. Card. If my letters dont look " Capitalized" enough she sends them back, if im missing a comma or period, she sends them back. And the best part is is she wont include the name of the 2 ppl that work for her, where just referred to as " the staff". I have received long, book-like, emails from her if i miss one simple thing... Even though most office resposibilities get directed to me. I am so dead inside, even was contemplating deleting myself. These videos have helped, and reading the comments helps too.
At my work 90% of the employees have fmla. An extra benefit if they have a illness or disability that interfere w their job. Such as rheumatoid, chronic fatigue, lupus, etc or the sole provider of a elderly parent, autoimmune flare-up, they get an extra 1000 hours a year not including regular pto. All u do is call fmla, report it, and they get in touch w your manager. If you use all your pto you just don't get paid for those days. So basically people call in all the time. Some only work 3 or 4 days a week and there's nothing your manager can do cause it's a privacy thing. Yeah and they always tell me they just didn't feel like coming. It makes lot of the other employees angry cause they have to pick up the slack. Thats why I'm getting out.
My boss is a nightmare!! He needs to know everything everyday! And when you try to explain he cuts you off and tells you that you are worthless and that he has his eyes on you! Also he assigns tasks to someone else and asks you about it and if you tell him you don't know what he is taking about he gets angry and says that you are stupid and know nothing!
How does someone who is NOT a micromanager answer the question if they are one or not? Seems like if you say you arent one, it's a insta assumption that you are Or is it you dont even ask and they just say that they are not a micromanager? Like they are putting it front and center without asking?
Try clicking Settings (looks like a little cog wheel) just below the video, then look for Playback Speed, you can slow the video playback speed from there.
If you feel you’re being micromanaged then you’re not a desirable employee. You don’t want to be managed or supervised. It’s that simple. Independent people become their own boss. The boss is not interested in micro managing you… trust me 😂 They want employees they can trust and are confident communicators. Not those who get off on their boss needing them to deliver. If you are s boss, fire employees that need to be micromanaged. Very simple.
Hmm I think the behavior is still micromanaging from an employee’s pov. As the employee may or not have a background in leadership before, so it can feel like the interaction can question their ability. But I can see that a boss may not be interested in micromanaging as well! Like in their head, they may be thinking about the reputation of the business or the production, numbers, etc. and if that worker can reflect what the boss is envisioning, if that makes sense. But it comes across wrong. Two things can be true at the same time. And employees can definitely quit, and managers can fire…but wouldn’t be better to try to talk it out and establish trust? Sometimes you can start over somewhere else or the company can start over with a new worker and still face the same problem, until the lesson is learned.
Don't forget to download my FREE Checklist to Uncover Your Purpose: benjaminpreston.com/free-training
My favorite is when they say they're not a micromanager. My manager just told me that the other day. It made me laugh.
Yeah, it's usually a swift denial...
MM's will see everything in a wrong vs right context. Also very critical. Thats a great way to figure out what ur dealing with. Good managers are adaptable and flexible, they want you to make your own decisions, and grow from them.
Nobody wants to deal with a micromanagement boss, they're too toxic! Just start making plans to leave!.
I love this, just found a new job away from a micromanager who always told me she didn’t want to micromanage me. Sure Jan. I always came with receipts and her ppl above her who had my back
I have a micromanaging boss, &;to me it looks like an anxiety disorder.
I don't have the time, or energy to bear the brunt of other people's mental illness, so I won't be staying there. The team has a high turnover because of her, and is only full of older women who need to stay in one place because of their age.
My workplace condition exact like you. I think i will be a pioneer of high turnover because someone who micromanages me is brand new. i wonder how high will the employee turnover is after i quit.
My boss is like yours except he uses his position to dangle their job security in front of people everytime they make small mistakes...this really f'ed me up mentally
Same here, all the people in my team (7) left in less than a year since I joined and now I feel like leaving too.
My manager is obviously still there even though she is responsible for that and in the last two months she started to micromanage me like hell.
She take me into 1h meetings over minor things with no business impact almost every week.
I agree honestly. These people lack self reflective capacity .
Everything you said is describing my boss!! He praises himself all the time and says that he understands and knows everything!
Great video!! My former boss was a workaholic micromanager. She had no personal life and worked every day from 5 Am till 11 pm. Weekends and Holidays included.
I was supposed to be the PR manager for a non profit but I ended up feeling like a ghostwriter since everything had to get my boss’s and the president’s seals of approval: from a 180 character tweet to a Facebook status, or a letter (simply meant to thank someone or another organization).
When I first started, I didn’t get a change over from anyone- everything was dumped on my desk during my first week in the office with very little explanation. I remember being in my 3rd week and Boss sent me a very rude email telling me I should be doing more work at this point - on my 3rd week on a new job.
She would never detail what she wanted work wise and never give feedback.
So finally two months ago, after a year of being gaslighted, micromanaged, manipulated, I hand my resignation letter. Farewell dtupid hitch.
So sorry you had to deal with that.. BUT very happy you’re moving on! The biggest victory you can have after dealing with a bad boss is being happy and moving forward.
Glad you found the video helpful!
@@BenjaminPreston thank you for making me validated and seen. ❤️
Find your micromanager's Achilles heel. If they like to spend an inordinate amount of time going over your work and what you do, keep them busy. Overperform and don't let up. Swanp them with reports and paperwork and things to approve. After a while, they'll burn out and leave you alone.
Fantastic strategy!
why over 4 millon quit their jobs, everyones tired of it
They have superior complex
From the title, I'm already thinking, "there's no working WITH a micromanager," when they just want a slave and zero pushback.
I've had micromanagers that wanted to take control to a personal level - "you need to speak this way and think this way" - constantly correcting subjective word use and tone rather than actually focusing on the real details related to a project - trying to change their employee's personalities and typically having a turnover rate specifically related to their unsustainable management style. Micromanaging doesn't allow trust and perhaps isn't actually interested in trust of developing autonomy in workers, just execution of commands.
7:42 spot on, I agree - nudging and guiding has been the most effective and revealing approach in my experience. Confrontation just sets off their defenses over listening "no....I've never tried to micromanage you....oh and can I ask you to not make up accusations, please - thank you" 😂. I've realized it's totally ok to just accept some are insecure, primarily their own business, and that our more authentic self-management and respect must remain adventurous to keep networking for a more sustainable fit for us, not just unsustainably self-sacrificing and catering to toxic environments.
Sometimes there's nothing the employee can do. "Managing Up" can work as a temporary measure, but the onus to change the behaviour should be on the manager and company. It's easy for people to find other/better jobs. Tips for dealing with them are like bandaids until ycu find a normal job again (where you are able to actually do the work you are compensated for)
Benjamin: “…how to tackle a micromanaging boss.”
Me: (takes the tackling thing literally) “Get a running start.”
To summarize: BOUNDARIES.
My boss micromanages to the insane extreme. For example:
She will check the christmas cards we mail out to patients. She. Checks. Every. Card.
If my letters dont look " Capitalized" enough she sends them back, if im missing a comma or period, she sends them back. And the best part is is she wont include the name of the 2 ppl that work for her, where just referred to as " the staff".
I have received long, book-like, emails from her if i miss one simple thing... Even though most office resposibilities get directed to me.
I am so dead inside, even was contemplating deleting myself. These videos have helped, and reading the comments helps too.
They say “we don’t do that here “ 😂
This was extremely helpful! THANKS
Yeah just quit no reason to put up with this
These were really helpful signs--thanks for sharing Ben!
At my work 90% of the employees have fmla. An extra benefit if they have a illness or disability that interfere w their job. Such as rheumatoid, chronic fatigue, lupus, etc or the sole provider of a elderly parent, autoimmune flare-up, they get an extra 1000 hours a year not including regular pto. All u do is call fmla, report it, and they get in touch w your manager. If you use all your pto you just don't get paid for those days. So basically people call in all the time. Some only work 3 or 4 days a week and there's nothing your manager can do cause it's a privacy thing. Yeah and they always tell me they just didn't feel like coming. It makes lot of the other employees angry cause they have to pick up the slack. Thats why I'm getting out.
This was an excellent video. Thank you.
Don't go to HR.
My boss is a nightmare!! He needs to know everything everyday! And when you try to explain he cuts you off and tells you that you are worthless and that he has his eyes on you! Also he assigns tasks to someone else and asks you about it and if you tell him you don't know what he is taking about he gets angry and says that you are stupid and know nothing!
Quit
Summary of how to work with a micromanager:
Do as they say;
Don't contradict them;
Find a support network - like the Samaritans.
You have hit the nail on the head!
I have a micromanaging boss who hired a micromanaging assistant.......
Same.
Yes, great ideas. Support group is great to have
thanks for watching, Ali!
How does someone who is NOT a micromanager answer the question if they are one or not? Seems like if you say you arent one, it's a insta assumption that you are
Or is it you dont even ask and they just say that they are not a micromanager? Like they are putting it front and center without asking?
I wished I learned this some months ago
Micro managing co worker is the worst being unable to communicate & trying to make you look dumb sdf end up losing the plot
All to familiar.
Micromanager = VERY VERY VERY VERY INSECURE
I’m leaving. Life is too short to spend the majority of my time with a toxic insecure person.
Me too
How to work ith micros... Don't!
None of this works usually. Trying to guid an insecure egomaniac that is
I love your videos but I find that you talk so fast it’s hard to follow and I feel like I really don’t retain much even if I listen to it again
Try clicking Settings (looks like a little cog wheel) just below the video, then look for Playback Speed, you can slow the video playback speed from there.
@@colinmacmillan2944 thanks. don't know why. didn't think of that.
If you feel you’re being micromanaged then you’re not a desirable employee.
You don’t want to be managed or supervised.
It’s that simple.
Independent people become their own boss.
The boss is not interested in micro managing you… trust me 😂
They want employees they can trust and are confident communicators.
Not those who get off on their boss needing them to deliver.
If you are s boss, fire employees that need to be micromanaged.
Very simple.
You said a lot of nothing buddy. Do you have a job?
utter rubbish -the MM is a person with bullying and anxious traits
Hmm I think the behavior is still micromanaging from an employee’s pov. As the employee may or not have a background in leadership before, so it can feel like the interaction can question their ability. But I can see that a boss may not be interested in micromanaging as well! Like in their head, they may be thinking about the reputation of the business or the production, numbers, etc. and if that worker can reflect what the boss is envisioning, if that makes sense. But it comes across wrong. Two things can be true at the same time. And employees can definitely quit, and managers can fire…but wouldn’t be better to try to talk it out and establish trust? Sometimes you can start over somewhere else or the company can start over with a new worker and still face the same problem, until the lesson is learned.
Umm the micromanager says a lot about them and their insecurities and control issues, not the employee.
You have hit the nail on the head!