Ego and Music - How Ego Can Destroy Your Musical Pursuits
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 28 ก.ย. 2024
- I can't tell you how many hours, days and years I wasted trying to become the best. It's your ego. Here's how to overcome it
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Ive learned that even insecurity is ego. Beating yourself up for not sounding or performing quite like others is always self centered, just self deprecating instead arrogant. It can be just as stubborn of a feeling, I would know. I think I and many others would just be better off letting go of ourselves, our pride, insecurity and just being naturally expressive people who aren’t concerned with comparison.
You hit it right on the dot!
Thankyou for this!
Man, SO good!! Absolutely 💯 🔥 🎶
Absolutely!!! Insecurity... shyness, etc...all them ego and vanity! It is what it is🤷🏽♀️
Damn right.
"The wise musicians are those who play what they can master."
-Duke Ellington
😉😉❤❤
- Use Time Signatures Wisely
- Tune Differently
- Understand how Compositions work
- ACTUALLY use scales & modes
- Delete your Socials
- ... FOCUS! (many have failed this one)
That's a blow to the gut...
Isn’t that obvious ?
Or what is he implying ?
Thelonious Monk “A genius is the one most like himself.” I take this quote as an expression of what to strive for, be like yourself. Do the things you love because you love them, the greats got great by finessing the craft they loved, not portraying something unlike themselves.
Yea thats such a beautiful quote
that's a gem!
I interpreted that as 'A genius is the person that you see yourself in' and it really made me think.
@@milky7257 this is a very interesting interpretation... hmm
@@milky7257 you'll have to explain further...
This reminds me of thing that Steve Morse said in his recent interview by Rick Beato and that stuck with me. I'm paraphrasing but he said something like "there will allways be someone that can play better than you but people are more interested by artist that play their own music with conviction"
There’s a vid of John Mayer somewhere saying, musicians often want to showcase how “good” they are and forget that 90% of the audience don’t know or don’t care they just want to like the song you’re playing regardless of whether it’s a couple of simple chords or a virtuoso piece!
@@MrKeefelm Exactly. That's why I'm not really excited about that Jacob Collier guy like most people seem to be (musicians). Apparently he's some prodigy. I checked him out and his music didn't strike me as anything special (even though it is from a certain perspective)
Whenever anyone is a "prodigy" these days it's just some theory wiz stuff and it doesn't feel like/sound like anything new and then they die off in a few years because they aren't a cute little kid anymore.
Music these days with real instruments seems to be only good in the eyes of others if it has complexity to it. Which I get and do like that too, but I don't like music solely because of complexity. I can appreciate it and notice it but I mainly look past that and into the soul of it, not theory. It's best to think in terms of painting when listening to music, not math - in my opinion.
@@Sledgehammers_Nail ultimately to connect it’s gotta make you feel something, an exercise in advanced harmonic concepts or technique means nothing if the song doesn’t speak to you. Regardless of genre, or the emotion you’re going for it has to fundamentally work! A musician might be impressed by your unconventional use of a secondary dominant diminished/augmented chord progression but most people aren’t musicians so you can easily wind up writing songs for a very narrow and slightly geeky audience! AKA Radiohead! (Who I love btw!)
Wow that's such a good thing to hear
Greatness is a matter of perspective and if you believe someone plays better than you then they do. There is no one better than me as a writer and I will never ever think or believe that, period.
the yt algorithm works way too well, this is exactly the kinda thing i need to think about rn
Same. Painfully so.
Same bro
me too
The universe helps you through everything, TH-cam is just another place in that :)
@@ryankelly1840 the universe has no desire or awareness of you the way you'd hope it does. youtube on the other hand is a website designed to keep you addicted and owned by one of the most corrupt privacy violating companies in the world along with the rest of social media :)
The thing that destroys me is self-doubt and procrastination.
Meditate
try limiting consumption of media & make more space for creating.personally that has done allot for me.
That’s what I did. Read some books about Focus, Habits, productivity and procrastination, after that you’re gonna be for sure a “monster”.
@@cigarettearms5992this is really good advice that I’m going to think about because sometimes when I’m in a production drought, just focusing on other peoples music, music that I love and music that I don’t love, all help inspire new ideas that get me excited to play again. However when I take these intentional production breaks to study other music I feel like it becomes more overwhelming to return to the practice itself if that makes sense. It seems like finding the right balance for how you feel is right would be the best, and not taking things too seriously can help avoid overwhelm
All the replies here are gold btw. My advice is: Do not be afraid of your own power. If you are afraid then your mind will find other things to do like self doubt, procrastiination etc. Own you, there is only one of you. Kick the day in the teeth and be amazing.
Be the best at being you, not who you think you SHOULD be…
Incredible! Story of my life. Pianist, music producer and video art here. Everytime I hear some genius pianist I want to pursue more in this direction. Next day I go to a rock concert and feel like I want to be on the stage with them. This is crazy ego marathon that never stops. You have to stop and realize that the world doesn’t care until you bring something genuine, authentic and original to the table. This is the only thing you should focus. Nothing else. Thank you for this. Subscribed.
I have this same experience, has taken years to realize what I was doing and how much it paralyzed me. Staying aware of it is key, and just playing what makes me feel something, while continuing to learn along the way.
Confirmation! ❤
You just told my life story..
Thank you for sharing!
The ego will always try to crop up, if not in music, then somewhere else. What I'm learning lately, is that it (the ego) is not the real 'me' and to just stay aware, and not to take it (ego) seriously. The 'real' is other side of the veil...touched by dialing in. Thanks for posting this -- is thought provoking. @@MichaelMartinezmusic
I used to grind so hard at the piano during my pre college and college years. I had put myself this goal to become a virtuoso pianist, and my inspiration was reading about other virtuosos and learning all they had to do was grind really hard, so I thought, hey if I grind really hard then I’ll become a virtuoso too!
But then reality hit me hard, you can’t force yourself to become a virtuoso by sitting in a room for 7 hours practicing. If some people can do it and it works for them, great! But, for me, grinding like that was making me miserable and I wasn’t achieving the results I expected. So I got burnt out.
Eventually I came back with a new mindset, nowadays I don’t practice nearly as often as I did before, but every time I practice it’s such a joy, and the best thing is, I can see the progress, I can feel it and if that means progressing just tiny steps every week I’m overjoyed.
I realized learning an instrument is a long life endeavor, it’s an art to be cultivated like a tree, with patience and persistence it will surely grow big and strong one day, also the same a tree growth cannot be rushed, neither can this art be rushed. Trying to do it would be a fatal mistake.m
I've been learning guitar recently and i just got aware of that long path that one must follow before doing something excellent. I mean, you're in conection with your instrument, so how can you force a connection? It's like wanting to love someone in a matter of days
@@sopademacaco1535 Exactly. Trying to force that connection will only drive you furrher away from the instrument.
Thank you❤
'I'm trying not to get too spiritual about this...' Let yourself be spiritual, it's all connected to that thread, let it happen.
As I warm up to making more content about this topic, I will definitely be diving in more spiritual topics! Thanks for the motivation 👍
Woo.
YESSSSS
🤮🤮🤮🤮🤮
Yes! More people need to do content and books on music and spirituality then the little content we have from Kenny Werner, Coltrane, Herbie, interviews with John Crusciante...
I think what’s good is the enjoyment of, and being present with, the process.
The process of creating, regardless of the end result.
exactly Steven!
Outcome independence. It has the power to transform lives
@@MichaelMartinezmusicis this ego? I suffer from thinking it is.
Yes!
.. and its so easy to forget this.. and get lost in my imagination
I think it's a symptom/expression of a deeper trauma that relates to believing you are fundamentally bad at everything. You get over it because you heal. You heal because you get over it. Wanting to learn everything is a defence mechanism against being called out for not truly knowing what you're doing. The young traumatized artist desperately wants their music to represent particular qualities that they want the world to associate with themselves, and they have a deep fear that someone will recognize that it's all an act. So arming yourself with knowledge and technique is a cope against not wanting to be exposed for not having anything to to with one's own music.
In my opinion / experience of course. It may be different for everyone
This is a very deep answer from psychological point of view, and I believe it’s true for many of us artists
def true for me damn. speak on it mr. r word username (...)@@eugene_plasmon
this one hit a lil too hard
On point.
Fucker it’s 3am don’t get me like this 😭
I'm not sure how to answer the final question, but this is a huge come to Jesus moment when it comes to being a musician. All musicians and artists have much more of a problem with narcissism than the average person. Ironically, you can get so much further faster learning simple stuff with elegance, then learning the hardest thing you can because you're hell bent on impressing other people. Wonderful vid.
I wouldn't say it's exactly narcissism, more feeling like you have to be better than everybody else to be worth anything and doing everything to prove it. Idk, maybe that is narcissism. As an amateur college musician, I do not think I am narcissistic or egotistical by nature or in my relationships. However, I constantly find myself doing things almost subconsciously that I think will make me look better than everyone else. I study a piece because I know people will say "omg you are so good!! your hands were moving like crazy! How did you do that?" I don't intend to be this way, I don't think it is healthy behavior and I don't do it intentionally, but the feeling of inadequacy is ingrained into my being.
@@crustyboi710I agree, it isn't narcissism. It's Ego.
My fragile ego has stopped me being creative for years.
@@crustyboi710 People regularly switch the meaning of the words narcissism and ego around so frequently it's nauseating. Narcissism is usually used whenever we feel that an ego-related trait is more shameful to us, which is why nobody wants to call any tendency of themselves a narcissistic one.
I think it's actually enlightening to consider the idea that the very group of people who can be the most emotionally expressive are especially prone to narcissistic tendencies, I know both is true for me, and it's difficult to understand the whole picture of myself with those 2 things in mind, but it is necessary to try I think.
@@crustyboi710spot on
Totally true. You have to be really strong when signed to major labels.
Very well said, and I am thinking about the word “ego”, and I think more and more, that such a thing is non existent. What is called “ego” is our strive to please other people regarded by ourselves as “important”, the “ego” is not about me, it is about “everyone else”.
I think we artists forget why we learn a style, or a certain thing. We need to remember why we started it. Most of us would say "Because I love it". That reason is enough to keep going and learning.
Ikrr, you hit the nail on the head 🎶⭐
This is good life advice in general. Just focus on the things you need, dont try to do everything at once.
This resonates so much! I have struggled with similar things my whole life. I didn't even want to be a master in all music fields but in every field in life. In that road your ego will definitely run out of gas and it happened to me. I'm still recovering from a total burnout. And the sad truth is I didn't master anything. But the burnout was still the best thing that have happen to me. It forced me so much deeper in to my self and everyone. Music is the only thing that I can do now and that is also a blessing because it means less distraction. I wish all the best for all of you :)
Thank you for sharing. I see myself in your story more than I'd like to admit 😔
Wow I’m experiencing exactly what you’re saying. In college I was obsessed with just being the best at everything. Drums, football, fitness, coding the list never ends. Now four years later I’ve flunked a ton of subjects in college, don’t have a job and I am severely burnt out and depressed. There is this deep desire in me to impress and prove something to people that has been inside of me since I was a kid. But now after a lot of deep self reflection I finally feel like I’m healing and I’m starting to prioritise things I actually want in life like friends, stability and family.
I started with classical guitar, went into hard rock, and learned a little bit of jazzy stuff. Always just took what I need for music...and, all areas of life. Its been a good life.
I debated going down the jazz rabit hole, but it was more information than I needed for my expression, so I didnt invest the time, and I'm still me, very deeply, just me.
Again, its been a good life.
I'm sure it has been sir, well done
What is also true, is that if you think you're not ready to make music because you don't know enough, or are not skilled enough, you'll be spending a lot of time not knowing what you actually need to actually improve. Instead of working on what you truly want, you'll be lost in other genres trying to find yourself. In reality, you're probably already there, you just need to shine a light on your current abilities, see your flaws, and then you'll have perspective to work on what you actually need.
For instance, let's say I'm a 4 chord songwriter, I only know how to make simple chords and melodies. I hear a song that uses a strange chord that really works well. I learn this chord and try to use it in a way that feels good in my typical songwriting. Now I know, and will be able to do that forever, and will be able to put those pieces together in new ways as I continue to advance.
The important thing is to center on your own musical expression.
True
When you dig deep into one idiom, all others fall into place naturally. Jazz is a great focus to study because it encompasses most, if not all, genres of music. I don't believe Miles ever intended his music to become what it was. It just eventually became his next topic of study organically.
This is very true and true for a lot of creative pursuits. Trying too hard to be a jack of all trades to appeal to everyone will tear you apart. You can't win everyone over.
And why would we even be trying to win everyone over?
@@jumhed994 insecurity most likely
I absolutely loved this video and what you had to say.
It has a lot to do with self-awareness and staying true to who you are (even though it might take time to figure out who you are).
I'm 65 and I started playing guitar two years ago.
Playing an electric guitar is a lifelong dream come true for me.
It's discouraging because there's no way I can compete with someone who started at 9 or 10 years old.
But it's important to remain true to your style.
What you said about people learning this and learning that technique or style. Are they doing it just to look cool?
Like fingerpicking, slides, pull-ons and pull offs, techniques are great to learn but you have to stay true to yourself.
Carlos Santana said you can have all the technique in the world but if you can't put together a string of melodic notes, you're lost.
I'm really glad I watched this because I was putting so much pressure on myself, but this has reminded me to stay true to what I want to learn and play and make sure that whatever I do, that it comes from the HEART.
Again, thank you. 🙏🕊️❤️
Love from the heart is what travels the fastest. Enjoy the journey my friend!
@@MichaelMartinezmusic
Amen and thank you brother.
🙏🕊️❤️
Realization of these things usually comes with experience in sorting out your mental flaws that you received during upbringing. I am also a musician, been doing this for 25 years, now I'm 39 and youtube recommended me your video probably because I've been watching a lot of videos regarding narcissistic abuse since I'm a victim of narcissistic parents and an ex-narcissist myself. So I perfectly understand your ego references here, good point.
No. Narcissistic personality disorder is a lifelong mental health disorder. However, treatment might help you manage symptoms and reduce the impact the condition may have on self-esteem, work, and relationships.
@@PeterPepper93 Sorry, I didn't get your point. You said 'No' as if disagreeing with what I said but then you made some statements that do not contradict what I said.
My point is it's impossible to grow out of narcissism. You cannot be an ex-narcissist, you can be aware of it but not become an "ex-narcissist"
@@PeterPepper93 ok, I'll rephrase: I had narcissistic traits inflicted upon me by parents. And I didn't feel comfortable with those traits, I felt there was a problem. Once you realize you're sick and you want to heal, you will find the way, understand the mechanism, and eventually heal with time. Well, I might not fully heal, some wounds will probably stay. People who are 100% narcissists, enjoy it, and don't feel there is a problem - yes, these people cannot be cured, that's exactly how my parents are.
@@PeterPepper93 No.
You can accomplish anything, no matter how ridiculous, if you commit your mind, body and soul to it.
You assume the limits are real.
heartfelt & sincere, thank you for this tidbit of wisdom.
You didn’t waste a second Michael. You were following your instincts and making the best decisions with what you knew at the time. And those taught you lessons and got you to where you are now. You are simply deciding to have a different approach and do different things with your time. That’s called growth. Good job
I loved your latest article. It is easy to get so distracted out there, while trying to get into your own headspace and find that special place.
We pull on our plethora of influences and musical knowledge. We only have one life and and infinite space of time. So we have to follow our heart, and do what we feel. So just put the hands on the keyboards, sing and see what comes. You know when it is the real thing, it just feels absolutely right, no matter how simplistic it is. It's the first breath, the original. We learnt we can't be all things to all men, and we can't be the greatest, but somewhere in the melting pot of music we manage to project our hearts. I remember thinking on listening to this amazing 11 year old pianist whilst studing in a London Music college. OMG, I will never be this great. I knew I had not got the chops or focus to be that incredible pianist, but I knew I just enjoyed writing songs, and searching for that one bass note that pulled the chord together. Right there was and always will be my joy. So just be as one in your own space and see where it all lands
I enjoyed hearing the calm presentation of your experience, Michael. I discovered the tendency to compare oneself to others will turn a musician either into a condescending snob, or else drive a person to want to quit music altogether (ego getting in the way?). I have worked as a musician since my teens, explored all kinds of keyboard related situations from church jobs, accompanist for singers, shows & choirs, played many jazz gigs, party/event pianist, with weddings, memorials, and lots of teaching! Got a Master's Degree in classical performance but now jazz my main passion - every situation can be a learning experience though, right? (sight reading, playing by ear, organizing). Of course some music situations are more enjoyable than others - but in order to work as a professional musician I just accepted that it was necessary for me to say "yes" to all kinds of gigs, but tried to keep a positive attitude and play each one with the right spirit!
When you play music, learning, practicing, performing, there’s no ego. It’s the before and after one needs to worry about.
This goes hard on 2x speed.
Jokes aside, thanks for this. Gives me something to think about.
I just tried that, but it made Michael sound like Jesse Eisenberg, so I brought it back to 1x to hear his nice calm voice. Great wisdom in this video!
no cuz i literally watched it at 2x speed lol
1.5 was perfect for me. Dude was draggin.
Went to school for classical music. Got my associates instead of bachelors in music because I wanted to learn basic music theory. Best decision ever. Got what I needed and got out. I make house and RnB music. My education helps me write the songs so much easier. However I did have to come to a point of accepting the rules I was taught don’t always apply to the music I was making. It was hard at times to give both the same energy so I agree you can get lost in the process so it’s important to keep the main thing the main thing. Study the skills and make them your own to make the music you want.
That was so good to listen... Thank you sincerely. I often think about my relation to music and what it really means to me. There are times that music comforts me in a spiritual level, and makes me smile and laugh. There are times that I want to share my music with the people around me. But also, there are times that music hurts me a lot, it challenges me so hard that I feel that I'm just helplessly bad in the only thing I was supposed to be good. Sometimes I don't even want to talk about music. But in the end of the day, music is the one true thing that really connects me to life and I hope to have a healthy relationship with it forever.
thanks for sharing
Awesome video! Very true! I finally got comfortable with my music when I started writing my songs/pieces from intuition rather than through direct thought and manipulation. Art is about expression and not imposing your ego!
Me too and you are so right. Also, it's great that you are able to express yourself more freely now! 🎶😊⭐🥳
Focusing on what you like along with figuring out what you actually like, in detail, is the key to good composition - great video.
Good reminder for me as an amateur musician...I need to remember I'm good enough to play what I want and it's important to just do stuff. I'm already where I want to be. Happens professionally too (not music), it's so important to keep learning but - when you know enough to do something, just do it. Keep learning, take from other fields but focus on what I do best and keep moving. Good video.
It's been a lifelong challenge to always remember why I loved music in the first place and to stay true to that. Self actualization as an artist should be pursued as honestly to yourself as possible. If ego gratification is what you really want, then it's it's almost impossible to not sacrifice some of that integrity because it necessarily requires a certain degree of putting others' expectations before your own. Sincerity, I believe, should be the prime virtue of art.
This is the first time I've heard someone voice these ideas. Thank you very much for doing so.
Michael, you welcomed me into you studio and were so incredibly encouraging to me beginning to learn to play piano. That was over five years ago and I put myself into lessons for two years. Now I play everyday or at least most days and I will always appreciate you for what you did. Thank you! And if anyone can go listen to Michael play and meet him if you can, do it! He's an amazing person and pianist.
The biggest breakthrough I had was recognizing what I loved about the songs I love, emotionally.
At the same time, I also recognized that music is also an intellectual puzzle, and there is inherent joy in unlocking that puzzle as an intellectual pursuit.
So now I focus just on the joy of playing songs I love, while also just thinking about how songs (especially jazz songs) work.
The reward is intrinsic, and very satisfying.
Also another big lesson is the realization that music isn’t about you. It’s about the audience. Songs have special meaning to people. Picking the right songs and playing them authentically can transport your audience members to happier times in their life, long in the past. Playing those songs allows them to relive their cherished memories. That’s a big responsibility: respecting and caretaking the memories of your audience.
Music is a time machine. A lot of it has to do with escapism and nostalgia.
When you bring a tear to someone’s eye, or a smile to their face, your job is DONE.
Everything else is superficial.
What is ego? It is who we THINK we are, it is what we have made ourselves from influences over the years. Our true self, that looks through our eyes and perceives everything going on in this world is an innocent bystander and does not belong to this world and the ego, it is infinite and lies within. It is light it is love and it will never die. Everyone has their own ego, we could not function without it in this world. We are all individual and unique, the best thing we can do is focus on the positive, on the heart, and the ego will just do what it has to, like driving a car we need to concentrate out the windscreen in front, otherwise we could crash. Focus on the light, be in love, and peace, the ego will always be there but in it's right place, we don't have to worry about it, it's not our job. Walk forward, find peace and happiness within, and let the world do whatever it does.
Our true self, an ‘innocent bystander’, nicely put! In the perspective of non-duality, that is called awareness. The ego is into judgement, awareness is not.
People dont talk about this enough! More spiritual talk! Thank you for your work!
Spent the last 4 years unpacking what you said, and its' reinvigorated my zest for creating (and finigsing) music!
What you shared is applicable to every discipline - you’re realizing something deeper about the fundamental nature of things, albeit through your musical journey.
".. you're not going to have to be the best..."
So true, man. So true.
Every musician, no, every artist needs to hear this! Thank you for the wise advice!
That your "little thoughts" saved my day! I'm facing a difficult time in my career. I can't find myself anymore, and I don't feel I'm good in anything. I lost my path and I can't find it! Really dunno what to do, but your words made me calm a little bit. Thank you!
Glad I could help!
As a classical pianist and piano teacher, I have wanted to delve into other styles and learn other musical instruments. I also feel like I need more hobbies so I can feel less inferior. I can't help constantly comparing to others...
This is something that I have been thinking more and more about as I get older, that I think it is important to ruminate on. Not just relating to music. Thank you very much for posting
Great concept cat. I have always lived by those exact principles and had 47 years of professional and personal joy from my music and all of the people i meet and see dance. When my instrument came out of its case my ego went into the case while I did a painting of sound.
Thank you again for your wisdom shared.
Thank you for this so much. This is exactly where my perfectionism and insecurities tend to lead me and I needed to hear this.
The message that really resonated for me was focusing on one thing at a time. Its quality over quantity
Thank you for this beautiful insight. As someone who fell out of practice for like 3 years and getting hack into playing again, I realized i wasted way too much time already instead of understanding the why things work aspect
:13 "I'm trying not to get too spiritual about this" ... I got spiritual about this, and it was very helpful. Appreciate your authenticity, vulnerability and kindness.
I do not totally agree with you.....Let's say Lenny Breau, he mastered different genres that's what made his guitar playing interesting.....much more interesting than a guitar player playing blues all day....
A guitar player playing the blues all day is probably getting 100x more out of the music than you listening to Lenny Breau. He's living his life the right way. Just like Lenny Breau.
@@schoolboyh4783 bullshit
And here we go again, Prince was definitely a genius... great ego, multi-instrumentalist and crossover artist.
This aligns quite well with my musical philosophy, love to hear you preaching it!!! I’ve never been good at everything, but I am very good at what I do. I rarely learn, I always write, and I love what I do.
我每次都需要被臣服自己喜歡的東西，越本質越好，因為我發現為了自己喜歡的音樂，我做了太多不屬於我原本需要做的東西，我也漸漸習慣這種感覺，覺得自己學的慢，但是總會有學完的一天，就一直不斷的增加給自己學習的項目跟興趣，我有太多精力了，並且在狀況內的時候，似乎一切都好重要是不可切割的一環，但對於能力還不是很足夠的我，可能有點太超出範圍了，我覺得我還是需要回歸本質，這是我最近一直被提醒的東西，總之，很感謝你的影片被我看到，這是來自台灣的問候與祝福，謝謝。
Sí
i think artists must have ego to keep going
There is a night/day difference though in belief in the work, without the need in external approval, and the typical ego so common in many people.
I had huge ego issues I was unaware of for years because I sought validation from others to appear a certain way. Such an ego is fragile and insecure, really a lack of identity more than secure in identity.
I'm so glad I saw this.Thank you for being my best friend
Thank you so much for your word! As an ADHD person, I tend to want to be and do everything, and it's very hard to focus on one thing because I need to feed my toxic enthusiasm... hehehhe
Thank you, thank you! I now decided I'll pursue a particular style to be really good at instead of forcing myself to learn every style and waste time not creating my own stuf.
Thank you!
This is a powerful message! I always make imperfect music, in fact I love the imperfections, I’ve never strived to make perfect music or to make music for anyone but myself, with this mindset I’ve naturally gotten quite far with my music. I highly recommend not caring what others think, being brave and exploring the different ways you can compose or improvise music, push yourself outside your comfort zone, music is fundamentally about expression and fun not perfection!
Thank you for this video. Also, I could listen to you speak all day. A soothing, intelligent, and intentional voice. Rare nowadays.
Thank you - as an adult learner I’ve suspected my ego getting in the way of my progress - just learning to let that go !
I personally am not trying to make music my career. But I invested a lot of time into it. I studied classical guitar as a kid, then learnt to play electric on my own, learnt how to do producing, a bit of composing, etc etc. I also sometimes notice the thoughts of "I want to become great", "I want to become popular", "I want to make others happy" all of which stem from the ego. But the essence of making music for me has always been self-expression and challenging perfectionism. It's therapeutic in a way. And I'm trying to get back to it every time my mind strays away.
But I think it's easier for me this way, as I'm keeping this as a hobby, and I'm not expecting to make money out of it. It becomes more challenging if it's a career I think.
P.S. I'm very happy you brought up meditation there, because I also meditate, and some spirituality definitely helps make sense of these things.
This really made me think about my music career before and now my work moving forward. Even a particular cowrite recently with a popular trance artist, who I now recognize I had no reason working with and had no passion or drive for the sound being created. This really helped me re-assess my commitments moving forward to commitment more to the right thing and less to the things that are unnecessary or adjacent to the goals in my life. So well said. Thank you, Michael!
I completely agree here. Ego has to die before great honest music/art/ literature and everyday deeds, is produced. Best wishes from SM Liverpool UK
Damn it's so satisfying just to listen to him formulating his thoughts in such a gentle manner. Very intimate and precious video, thanks for such a sincere content!
Love this! "Grab what you need" - such a good perspective. I needed to hear this, relieving after feeding myself all of these success-stories of musicians who seem to "have it all together". It's good enough to play and enjoy the ride, if that's what you're about. Thanks!
I agree 100%. This is been my story till now and it spoiled the pure joy of making music of the beginner.
The key word you said is "identification",,when you start wanting to be another person (your hero probably) and you set the bar that's where the problems begin
Exactly…. Thanks for sharing!
This video is proof of how I was ruining my life in this industry by showing I know everything and this Ego kills my own growth
Very interesting! I can definitely relate to what you’re saying. I went through a similar path, starting with classical guitar in high school, then learning jazz at university, then playing bands, corporate gigs, writing my own songs, producing them etc… music was my living for about 15 years, but it took me a while and a lot of psychological pain to uncover the hidden story of the ego which said that I needed to proof to the world how good I could be. But this got me depressed quite a few times as I realized you can’t compare yourself to anybody else. There will always be people better than you at any given discipline, but it’s not about that. We are all unique in the way we express ourselves.
I had to go back to the basics and ask why I loved music in the first place, and I remember it was about the feeling. Nothing to do with how much you know or how much you can impress others.
Music is nothing other than an avenue to openly express your rough feelings.
Beautifully said! One thing I've started to admire about people who age well is that, realizing they don't have the boundless energy they once had, they begin focusing their energy and time on the things that they really care about, and cutting out things that don't feed their soul quite as much. Even things they once loved to do may be set aside, because something else feels more important, and energy is finite. I'd like to be a little more that way.
I gave up on music a while back and your video popped up and i guess im gonna go back to relearning what i love to do on a daily basis or whenever i can. Thank you!
Beautiful, Michael! Thank you for what you said and how you said it. This is the big pair of handcuffs for musicians and composers, improvisers: the thought that ‘I am doing this’. ❤
And it feels so good when the handcuffs finally fall away doesn’t it!
This is very true of writing music. Some music is seen as more cool than other music. If you let this affect you, say through people you respect or love, you’ve put yourself in a box. You won’t write stuff that isn’t ‘cool’ that might have been very good. You’ll also run out of ‘cool’ things to write. To escape this box of limitations you need to develop, or find, the courage to write and develop *anything* that comes into your head. This also means recognising and wrestling with your ego because you risk rejection. The is a process I’ve gone and go through repeatedly. Because most (all?) creators want their work to be appreciated, by at least one person, preferably uninvested in you and your art, the drive or pressure to create more of what you think will be accepted also never really goes away.
To escape this box of limitations!! That is the dream...
I wonder if it's possible for creators to lose the want of their work being appreciated by others... perhaps it's possible that one's own appreciation for one's own work can be enough? No... Maybe??
Keep rolling and wrestling 💪
I appreciate this video. I'm slowly learning to strip things back, simplify, and hone in on what comes naturally to me. I still catch myself trying to be perfect a lot of the time, and get caught up in it more than I'd care to admit. It's freeing to admit the things I puzzle over the most end up the most bloated, and the things I put the least thought into end up being my favourite.
I’ve been searching the answer for this very question for such a long time. It’s just amazing that your video popped up on my feed as if the universe was helping me find my path. I create indie electronic music with a lot of organic instruments blended in. But as I record guitar parts into my composition, I always had this urge to make myself the best classical guitarist first and then continue composing music. I’ve wasted a lot of years doing that and honestly, I was just missing composing music the way I did before. Thank you for your perspective. You’ve made perhaps one of the most powerful videos here for all musicians. This will help a ton of people. I’m extremely grateful for this. Thanks again.
Thank you, glad it helped 🙏
Excellent point. My advice as an old musician is play what you feel and enjoy and if you are lucky others will feel and enjoy what you do. Otherwise you just go round in circles trying to be something you are not or second guessing. Also define success, it could just be having the time and space to do what you love. Music is great....
Thank you so much, this really really resonated with me and came exactly at the right time!!
You are right one does not need to be able to everything and the thing about ego is true... ofentimes we lose sight of whats really important:
Exploring our own creative potential and the ideas within them, having fun in the process and challenging our growth in a healthy way!
I learned a lot trying to be "the best" or doing too much and it did make my music suffer so now I'm still bad at making music but I know a lot about it 👍
Can relate so much....the neverending fight with the ego is real
Thank you! I am about to retire from my full time job and am planning to spend my time composing. I have grand plans of doing EVERYTHING I (think) I need for this. (Play piano, guitar, bass, percussion, be an awesome audio engineer...), but your video made me realize that I should just jump in, take what I need, and enjoy the process.
I love how slowwwwwwly you speak, it’s put me in a gorgeous ASMR relaxation state.
I was doing violin and orchestra, and classical and jazz guitar all at once in college until I finally hit my breaking point. I can definitely relate.
So true! Kids, learn this.
I come from more of improvisor's POV, but I found when your ego is less involved with playing my music, that normally means, at least to me, that your mainly focused on serving the song's needs in that moment, not flashy playing just for it's own sake that can easily sound out of place. It's def a tricky landscape to traverse, but a more rewarding way of playing and a higher calling, I guess you could say. No matter how good you get or what genre(s) you play, that's where the deepest musical satisfaction come from for me. For example, Michael Brecker was a tenor giant with monster chops, but he didn't display all that in that on the solo for "Still Crazy After All These Years" by Paul Simon. He heard what the song wanted and rose up it with something simple, spacious, soulful, deeply touching. There's not one uneccesary note in it. It's perfection.
Thank you so much for your words. I’ve wanted to make music my whole life but I’m stuck practicing, learning different instruments and studying technology. You’ve inspired me to trust my gut and do what I want :) which is to get a cheap midi-controller and start creating!!
what you say is interesting, thanks for sharing. relaxing the ego is certainly a good way to put it.
many years ago when i was starting out, i veered away from what i was "good at" and working toward mastering at the time. i was a solo folk artist and got bored playing the genre and my career was very insular as a result of always being alone. it was very lonely for me at the time and i was mostly listening to electronic bands. i quit folk music to explore pop/electronic, try to become a producer and DJ/ beat maker but sucked at it, but that's what my ego envisioned for myself. failed at this and naturally came back to writing and playing folk music.
i don't have regrets but i wish i'd not been so judgemental and hard on my young self, nurtured my strengths in songwriting and guitar that i eventually came back to. but that's just it. no matter your path, you will always come back to what feels right. your gut will tell you (and other people) that is where your strengths are. so no regrets! you will end up exactly where you need to be, no musician's journey and exploration is a waste of time. everyone is on their own path.
Great advice... never take yourself too seriously
Absolutely spot on! I’ve tried to become the “best” jazz drummer in school and in combos but that wasn’t useful. I started just focusing on what I like about jazz and then supporting the band as best I can. Taking jazz chords from songs or copying rhythmic ideas and implementing them into my own indie music is constructive to me. Listening to world music and Afro pop taught me that pop don’t always need a straight groove. It’s just a bunch of tools in the toolbox but it doesn’t mean I can build a skyscraper out of jazz
I started out playing folk and rock guitar. Then, I pursued classical guitar and cello for years. I played and practiced the classical repertory often. I’m sure my ego was involved but I truly loved the music and felt incredible passion about playing. Only, I started both quite late - in my 30s and 40s. Although I attained a nice level I truly was fighting against time and physical obstacles - back problems in particular. In the end, whatever your motivations are, I have to agree that it’s too difficult to “master” more than one instrument and style. There’s nothing wrong with trying different things but one has to have a realistic vision of one’s goals and what is possible.
Great to see more creators besides myself talking about this kind of thing! Fantastic video.
I don’t play music. But, this is definitely a mindset anyone needs to have..
Thanks for the honesty and great insight.
It’s a tough call. Sometimes the journey is required for the perspective to be developed, so that one can comprehend the lesson. I’ve always taken away things that benefited me greatly . While sometimes looking back or looking forward it’s something we tend to analyze, but it is a fine line between knowing if this is just another clever layer of the ego.
The great thing about this video is that this can be applied broadly to other art forms.
This video popped up exactly when I needed it. Its an instant sub and I,m so humbled by this. Thank you.
I applied this video to my programming skills now, since ego is such a versatile thing which is everywhere in our everyday lives.
One should be very brave to realise and accept that ego drives him and not the sincere want.
I have no idea though how to get that courage to finally change my life. Overthinking is the least thing you want to do, but it’s so hard to keep everything in mind while doing something.
What you say gives me lots to think about. Is it wise to try to please others expectations of you and your talents when what is desired is to keep you doing one thing that may not be what you understand is what you need to do. I’m glad the algorithm showed me this today. It speaks to a situation I’m dealing with now.
This is in part why it's so emotionally and technically challenging to become a full-time orchestral musician. To win an audition you need to (amongst other difficulties) master so many different styles (baroque, classical, romantic, contemporary etc) which all demand specific skills... I do feel like I'm wasting a lot of time learning styles that I don't particularly enjoy but the overall dream of playing in an orchestra is genuine and not based on ego. Maybe I don't love the entire repertoire but it's still the most beautiful job I can imagine.
Hot diggity, Michael, you lookin’ fine! The years have been kind to you my friend. Glad to see your hard-earned insight evoking such empathy and positivity in the comments. I still listen to your tracks at work to this day!
After 8 years, I still have not found a specific genre I enjoy more than others. I have worked on and produced anything from psytrance, to ambient, chillstep, mid-tempo, cinematic, and future bass.. each of these genres employ techniques that others don’t.. and the knowledge of these techniques can be brought over to the other genres to potentially improve them.. so that’s why I personally like to bounce around different genres every once in a while