I remember one time I went on a date back in college and he asked the waiter to split the bill. He did try to have sex with me but I said no. He got mad. Even though I paid for myself, he still thought I owed him something. Fortunately he drove me home. That was the last time I paid for my own meal on the first date. Oh and before our date, he took a SHOWER at my place claiming he just needed to use my bathroom. After he took me home, I blocked him. Fortunately I came across videos like yours my senior year of college and I ended up meeting a good guy who paid for our first date no problem.
Girl! He used your shower, he used your time he certainly felt entitled to use your body. Young girls are not taught on how men operate and how they are programmed to use deception to get what they want which is 🐱. While stupid girls read magazines on crushes and zodiacs compatability young boys are developing their game on how to obtain benefits without minimum to no effort. And we get movies and crap telling women that "holding s3x" is manipulation. No, it's not, it's self preservation. I noticed the guys who show cheapness from the start react very badly when they don't get what they want.
She argued and defended this behavior on Twitter. I could not believe it! She is a pretty girl. My heartbreaks that she doesn’t know she deserves better and doesn’t have to do that for a date. I just... can’t. Why on earth would she do that? Who are the men and women in her life? No one ever told her anything? Heartbroken for her.
True, no one is born with relationship knowledge. You are modelled by the people around you on how to act and what to accept, anything else you learn from channels like these or personal experiences. You live and learn
@@brittneysperspective8433 Didn’t know she defended that because I didn’t watch the video yet but hopefully she will come around. If not, her life her consequences.
I truly believe she pay for the date because she wanted to have a special place in his life and not seem as other woman that just ask for money. I’ve been around countless high earning men and they would refuse to take money from me if I offer to pay for anything not even a pack of gum. My wallet don’t exist around men.👸🏽❤️
Not all high earning men are men with standards because not all men with money are giving of their finances. AND, there are men who aren't high earners who know that they are to pay & provide. It's the man character & how they manage their funds that's important. Not all men with $$$ are worth the headache.
The last line was the most impactful, “ YOUR NOT GOING To ATTRACT A QUALITY MAN BY PAYING FOR HIS TIME”. That sentence speaks Volumes. The person paying for the time usually is the most interesting. An the time and money spent is seen as a investment into getting to know someone. You have to pay to play.
What’s so embarrassing is my mom only ever dated provider men, including my father and I still ended up a masculina majority of my 20s until I found Chloe’s channel 🤦🏻♀️
The culture is big now on women having low standards: splitting the bill, driving your man around and buying him gifts, having sex early on, marriage no longer being sacred, etc. Don’t blame yourself, probably the majority of women on this channel were once deceived. At least you can ask your mom where to meet provider men loll!!
@@kathyalex778 right. I swear millennial, zillenial, and older gen z women were Taught by pop culture during our coming of age to be hyper independent and date dusties. Bc majority of my friends also dated dusties and paid for everything. Maybe 2-3 women I knew always only dated provider men their entire lives and they all grew up poor. All of my upper middle class friends weren’t dating provider men until more recently. Actually only 1 upper middle class friend in college always only dated men who paid for everything but she was the only 1.
@@AFFTFOMSICHTS Well the first step towards change is being aware of your situation. I'm sure that by watching Chloe and learning how to date with logic (and not just feelings) will have you miles ahead of your peers. You will be fine! Don't worry about how other people choose to navigate their relationships though, when they're ready maybe they will learn, whereas some women will forever grip onto the "independent woman" trope for dear life and couldn't imagine being provided for.
My concern is that she thought it was wise and/or safe to have a guy she barely knew meet her at her place of residence in order to pick her up on the first date. NO. NO. NO. NEVER and I do mean NEVER allow someone whom you barely know to know where you reside. If you don't want to drive then you take an Uber. Your first date should be during the day in an open and public place b/c you don't know what type of man you will encounter. Never bring that person back to your house b/c many women have been murdered/kidnapped/r*ped/sex trafficked for being naive, too nice, accommodating, too laid back and trusting when first meeting a man. Always let a friend or family know that you're going on a date, your location, time, and his picture along with your dates info. This is for your PROTECTION and SAFETY ladies.
I believe that having high standards prevents you from succumbing to low value people and experiences, although it may mean you have less interactions overall. Having bottom of the barrel, scraps, or breadcrumb standards means your “dating pool will be bigger”, but you will have men disrespecting you, begging you for sex after they just met you, and getting angry when you’d prefer him to pay the bill. I’ve spent enough time dating immature, lazy men out of boredom and loneliness that I have now learned being with a traditional man with good character is the only kind of relationship I want, otherwise I’ll stay single. Ladies PLEASE do not give yourself away for Free.99. Men in other cultures do pay for everything and will move mountains to please you. You are worth more than some immature little boy in a grown man’s body.
Role Reversal is a woman’s life sentence with no parole. I’ve learned that a young woman can’t understand having standards or worth if it has never been taught. I saw the whole video and it is truly distasteful how she is tolerating his behavior but also how she can’t relieve it wasn’t in her best interest to go out with him.
Yes my mother was ALWAYS the bread winner and didn't require much from the men she dated. I ended up being the same way with my relationships in my 20s. Wasted my time and energy. Now in my 30s, picking up the pieces.
Especially when the mother purposely ruined him, so he is not fit for purpose in the real world. It’s best to be aware, spread awareness of convert incest sons to young ladies and yourselves.
The thing is these dusties are dangerous. These days you can’t just dismiss them politely, might cost you your life. The best advice is to just smile, dismiss yourself, and BLOCK in this situation.
“Hey everyone, Chloe here”. I always smile when I hear this intro. Do the work ladies. Get therapy, level up your mindset as well as your body. If you need to cut off toxic friends/family, do that. Don’t date until you’ve truly done a deep dive on why you attract certain kinds of men. Make peace with both the good and bad sides of yourself and every aspect of your life will improve. Give to yourself first/set boundaries and just watch how people treat you. I WISH someone had given me this advice when I was a teenager. Listen to Miss Chloe.
@@wordlifefactory1656 I absolutely agree. Writing down what you want is a powerful visualisation tool. Journaling your thoughts and feelings will get everything out of your head and prevent you from oversharing and allow you to focus on change and improvement.
I was in a relationship with a guy, who barely paid for anything. He'd give me the 'pay now I'll send it to you after' excuse. Of course this never happened... I see where I was wrong in this situation- by allowing him in my presence, I was devaluing myself. Definitely need to do a lot of shadow work to get better because I never want to be in that masculina position ever again🙄
The older men in my family use to say use that as test to make it a last date. Real men will never let a woman even go near her purse on date let alone pull your money out. These are the men that have been taught and learning proper protocols.
If enough Women would stop going out with these Men or never go out with them again(no 2nd date)…maybe they would self reflect, realize they are the common denominator and try to improve. It does a disservice to all Women when they don’t give honest feedback and/or accept “lowballing”.
I agree 1000%. These men act the way they do because they get away with it. Decades ago it was unheard of for women to be paying for anything on a date, letting alone going back to someone’s place that you just met!!! That was a big no no
@@kathyalex778 Lol..to me it’s like the elephant in the room..like the person who’s breath doesn’t smell too fresh… but no one wants to tell them…you need a mint lol. If after awhile they see they can’t catch any bait with their behavior, they will have to level up or be left out. To the Women I say always choose yourself and be ok with being alone. You gotta stand for something.
@4:00 It’s like that movie A BRONX TALE. It’s not about what you say to children, it’s about what they see. You have to lead by example. Period. You cannot expect your children to do something that you cannot do. Who are you? What do you allow? 20 years from now....That is your children. 😑 Do you like what you see? CHANGE. PERIOD.
If WE keep the bar low, then why would men aspire to act like a real man? Somehow (some) women have been convinced that "males" are in short supply, as if there is a "going out of business" sale on men. The "Well at least I gottta man!" way of thinking only leads to a life of gaslighting, stress, manipulation and sorry. Set your standards high and know that you will find someone who meets them.
Glad to hear Chloe's take on this! I was taught that if the man asks you out, he pays, and to bring your own money & transportation in case things go wrong. This girl should have never entertained a man who would ask her for gas money to take her out. And she didn't need to be alone in a car with a strange man who tried to coerce her into sex on the 1st date. He also lied about having children, & she said she didn't want to date a man with kids.
I love this channel! Thank you so much Chloe 🥰 your the first one that taught me so many things about feminine and masculine nature. More than I was ever taught at home. I learned that some things are just in a woman’s nature/design: 1. Women are competitive and comparative by nature. ( this is not inherently a bad thing, I’ve learned that comparison doesn’t have to be that important, it helps me want to level up or see what I truly desire) 2. Women love attention. We also love a man’s attention. I often think of women like flowers, we are beautiful and with a strong, alluring fragrance in order to attract the bees and the birds. Attention/male attention doesn’t have to be a bad thing when it’s balanced with self love, self respect and boundaries. 3. Women repeat what we were taught. We are huge observers and what we see, we do. Sometimes even when it’s not beneficial for us. 4. We as women have the responsibility to vet and select. It’s always has and will be our responsibility when it comes to who we ENTERTAIN. 5. Women need a sense of belonging/nurturing to be healthy. In order to thrive in our femininity. We need to be allowed the safety and freedom to express our feminine nature. We need lots of love, nurturing, warmth, encouragement, affirmation, affection and space. Men’s nature/design: 1. Men need success/accomplishment in order to be healthy. They need to have something that drives them gives them purpose/allows them to flourish in the masculine. Whether it’s a thriving business, a promotion at work, a successful rap career, an artistic talent or a high ranking position in the service. 2. Men are hunters by nature. It’s in their nature to compete and conquer. They enjoy the chase and they enjoy to win the PRIZE (which is you) or your 🐱. 3. Men want sex! This was the hardest one for me. I had so many negative views centered around this. I have done so much healing and come to understand that. Sex is not a bad thing! If a man is attracted to you he will want to have sex with you. They will do any and everything to get access to that, it’s your job to set the standard to how they will get access to that. 4. Because men are hunters by nature. They will instinctly understand how to get what they want and if they don’t they are taught and socialized to figure it out. If they sense or smell low self esteem or desperation they will see you as “low hanging fruit” and sadly they might (if they are a dusty) take advantage of this.
I was just thinking about you! I was thinking “where is my dose of Chloe* gospel?” Lol I am glad to hear from you. Oh dear! This is why I always have money on myself while on a date but luckily I never had this situation since I usually met them at a certain location and I drive myself and tell someone about who I am meeting, where I am meeting them and how they look etc. She sadly played herself, I do hope she learns from this. I never pay on dates, give a man money and I don’t “put out” unless I am ready.
I think a man with twisted intentions will always see how far he can get over on you. He made no commitment or investment in her, so he doesn't care. She was willing to put out for gas and food. He wanted to see what else would she "put out for" and he didn't mind wasting time to do it. Because when a man has no problem wasting his own life....he will have no problem wasting yours.
Girl I had to clutch my pearls watching this video circling around geesh. She could’ve went out by herself enjoying herself if she had to pay for his gas and her food what in the world. Dudes don’t have pride.
Exactly if you’re going to pay, might as well go out with your girls or go out by yourself. Men who respect themselves do not expect women to pay nor do they act crazy like the guy in the video.
I can’t tell you how much you’ve changed my life Chloe ❤️ what a blessing and breath of fresh air you are for women who were never role modeled correct feminine behavior. Thank you from the bottom of my heart ❤️
Basically your own happiness is up to you and the decisions you make. No man can make you do anything you do not want to do. Stop giving all the power, all the choice and all the time in the world for men to make you out to look like a desperate fool. 🤷🏽♀️
New subscriber thanks for this my adopted momma's husband died so I don't know some of these things but im not this soft. I woulda opened the door for him and tripped him on the way out
Nah she's actually really an abuser. I do however hate that bc of her lies people are calling out now toxic femininity when it's really just narcissism and she's making it alot harder for women that do get abused.
*The good thing is at least she DOES have money to pay. Imagine how this could've really gone left field. She is still young and hopefully learned from this as this is a teachable moment for women all over. You must get to know these dudes BEFORE you decide to go out with them. Preferably, they need to invest first. Then you decide the time, and only go out in the daytime to public places. Always drive or better yet take Uber. Have your own money, drop the location for a friend or family member to know where you are at all times and know the exits and where the bathroom is. WOMEN MUST KNOW THE GAME!!!*
I'm not even finished the video yet and I just want to give you your flowers now sis! 💜🌺🌼🌹💮🌸! This was a whole WORD.💯 My backstory is I am 52 yrs old and it's honestly been a lifetime lesson for me. When I saw this story I was so sad. Thank you so much for doing this work for our community real talk. The part about "generational curses", THAT PART! AMEN AND AMEN AGAIN! Thank you for making my spirit smile. God bless 💜💜
Wonderfully, put Chloe. This video reminds us that we as ladies have a responsibility in determining our self worth and we have the power of choice. I love all of your content. Please continue inspiring us with your throughly researched, intentional, and gracefully put work! Love from FLA ♥️
I remember seeing what happened to that young lady, and all I can do was SMDH. SHE paid for the date and the gas, and HE had the audacity to expect “dessert” and had a temper tantrum like a little toddler when he didn’t get it. I wanted to shake that woman because she’s young and very pretty, so she would have a very easy time attracting and getting a provider man. I see this a lot with younger women where they feel like they have to be 50-50 and lead with their financial success. This attracts nothing but men looking for a “sugar mama” and men who are looking for a “Barbara the Builder” to improve their financial status so they can get the woman they really want. Chloe, please keep doing your work on educating young women.
I have recently realised that those who will hang a woman like this quicker than the Roadrunner running from Coyote treat THEMSELVES with the same harshness AND have done the same!!!!!. I have been there. Those who live in the truth of their healed feminine energy will simply softly tell her to question her actions, offer her compassion and remind her to listen to her intuition....Because Madam 'Billpayer' knew deep down inside....this aint right....Let's offer ourselves so much compassion that the 'automatic' response to shame the actions of this woman becomes a very unattractive response...Thank you Chloe for your guidance ...
Hi Chloe, My last comment which was intended for this video, somehow, ended up on your Frienimies Video. Nevertheless, Thank you for your acknowledgement. I have shared your videos with all of my Nieces. Unfortunately,they aren't listening as I stressed the importance of Breaking the Generational Curse, especially coupled with the fact that they all have Children..ie Girls !! I can only hope they wake up and get the message and pass this Wisdom on to their little girls !! Thank you Chole for your unmatched Wisdom !! 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰
Wow. The gems in this one. Chloe_ is back with rare form. Part of me prays prays prays for black women to start knowing their worth and understanding their black woman magic. But I’m also focused on unlearning my own poor modeling and I gotta stay on track, focused with my energy light. Still a little prayer. Cuz these dusties getting away with too much. Let it be a lesson for her. Hopefully she finds this channel and others and never ever do these things again.
This is what happens when young women try to “prove” themselves to a man a lot of these feminists agree with 50/50. But idky they would think that is a date… I’m not sure if that’s how this young lady was thinking or if it was lack of self esteem and speaking up. Either way to me the whole scenario is a red flag. Im 33 and I never met a man who called a 50/50 split a “date”. I knew there are guys who agree with this concept but good luck with being cherished by that energy. I’ll pray for the girls who subscribes to this thinking especially if you subscribe and STILL want the benefits of a feminine woman.
I had a crazy talk of offer proposal couple days ago a guy I been seeing who has ghosted me …. Asked me if we can be together he wants to grow and build with me. Yet this entire time he’s never treat me right and our relationship is good when we r together but not good no communication when we are apart he works down the road etc an now What’s to move in together. But I think he lost his job he is getting kicked out of the apartment he’s a room mate on couch not on the lease but if they see he’s not working So how are they going let him stay ??? He told me he’s now ready to build and be with me and the reason why is because he has completely lost everything he only has him and a bag of clothes …. Lol 😂 so what do u have to offer me within the situation u are in ? I asked he didn’t have a explaining he hasn’t said nothing back. Exocet a couple gibberish words
So he wants to stay together but wants me to move out my parents house where I’m saving growing building and I run a business in my 1600 sw foot top of the house and I’m only child home my brothers left. So our home is paid my car is paid i have minimal bills
Hey 🤗 yes, you can still make better choices. Don't beat yourself up and be patient with your progress. I wish you all the best, I know you will do great xx
I remember one time I went on a date back in college and he asked the waiter to split the bill. He did try to have sex with me but I said no. He got mad. Even though I paid for myself, he still thought I owed him something. Fortunately he drove me home. That was the last time I paid for my own meal on the first date. Oh and before our date, he took a SHOWER at my place claiming he just needed to use my bathroom. After he took me home, I blocked him. Fortunately I came across videos like yours my senior year of college and I ended up meeting a good guy who paid for our first date no problem.
Damn he has a lots of guts. Must have been the type of women he’s been with
Girl! He used your shower, he used your time he certainly felt entitled to use your body.
Young girls are not taught on how men operate and how they are programmed to use deception to get what they want which is 🐱.
While stupid girls read magazines on crushes and zodiacs compatability young boys are developing their game on how to obtain benefits without minimum to no effort.
And we get movies and crap telling women that "holding s3x" is manipulation. No, it's not, it's self preservation.
I noticed the guys who show cheapness from the start react very badly when they don't get what they want.
What a dusty foo he showered In ur house
"Don't waste time on Men who can't afford LIFE!" Chloe
Yes
DO NOT give your home address to strangers. Why are these young women not paying attention to the dangers???
A lot of women operate from a place of desperation and scarcity.
Honestly we need a town hall meeting because the bar is really low out here
if I had a daughter i would tell her this 'STOP PUTTING ATTRACTIVE PEOPLE ON A PEDESTAL'
Yes. THIS is a whole vibe.
I’ve always said that ✊🏾
@K. Kong bye lurker
This is the one !
She probably never been taught that before. Best thing to do is to learn from it, forgive yourself, move on, and prevent that mistake again.
She argued and defended this behavior on Twitter. I could not believe it! She is a pretty girl. My heartbreaks that she doesn’t know she deserves better and doesn’t have to do that for a date. I just... can’t. Why on earth would she do that? Who are the men and women in her life? No one ever told her anything? Heartbroken for her.
True, no one is born with relationship knowledge. You are modelled by the people around you on how to act and what to accept, anything else you learn from channels like these or personal experiences. You live and learn
@@brittneysperspective8433 Didn’t know she defended that because I didn’t watch the video yet but hopefully she will come around. If not, her life her consequences.
Completely agree
@@kathyalex778 I had to realize that. I used to be so harsh with people until I realize I had been careful taught everything I know.
“A dusty’s job has always been to devalue a woman’s value.” - Chloe_
ingrain this is your subconscious mind, feminine sisters. 💎💕
Yes i have been there my Self Worth improved since listening Chloe Amen !!!! Dusty go away from me facts!!!!
I truly believe she pay for the date because she wanted to have a special place in his life and not seem as other woman that just ask for money. I’ve been around countless high earning men and they would refuse to take money from me if I offer to pay for anything not even a pack of gum. My wallet don’t exist around men.👸🏽❤️
@@vanaphill2454 he would probably got verbally defensive and try to flip it on her.
Not all high earning men are men with standards because not all men with money are giving of their finances. AND, there are men who aren't high earners who know that they are to pay & provide.
It's the man character & how they manage their funds that's important. Not all men with $$$ are worth the headache.
@@ChannelFiend I agree
@K. Kong neither are woman so here we are
That’s where that “I’m not like most girls” mindset gets you.
This is why I always go on dates with my own transportation. If something bad happens I will have a safe exit strategy.
I've dealt with too many mentally unstable, unpredictable men. There's no way I'm letting him pick me up. It's too dangerous.
Always, I made that mistake once, no better assume better lol.
The last line was the most impactful, “ YOUR NOT GOING To ATTRACT A QUALITY MAN BY PAYING FOR HIS TIME”. That sentence speaks Volumes.
The person paying for the time usually is the most interesting. An the time and money spent is seen as a investment into getting to know someone. You have to pay to play.
What’s so embarrassing is my mom only ever dated provider men, including my father and I still ended up a masculina majority of my 20s until I found Chloe’s channel 🤦🏻♀️
The culture is big now on women having low standards: splitting the bill, driving your man around and buying him gifts, having sex early on, marriage no longer being sacred, etc. Don’t blame yourself, probably the majority of women on this channel were once deceived. At least you can ask your mom where to meet provider men loll!!
@@kathyalex778 right. I swear millennial, zillenial, and older gen z women were Taught by pop culture during our coming of age to be hyper independent and date dusties. Bc majority of my friends also dated dusties and paid for everything. Maybe 2-3 women I knew always only dated provider men their entire lives and they all grew up poor. All of my upper middle class friends weren’t dating provider men until more recently. Actually only 1 upper middle class friend in college always only dated men who paid for everything but she was the only 1.
@@AFFTFOMSICHTS Well the first step towards change is being aware of your situation. I'm sure that by watching Chloe and learning how to date with logic (and not just feelings) will have you miles ahead of your peers. You will be fine! Don't worry about how other people choose to navigate their relationships though, when they're ready maybe they will learn, whereas some women will forever grip onto the "independent woman" trope for dear life and couldn't imagine being provided for.
@@kathyalex778 you’re so right thanks 😊
Me too, love. It’s ok, never too late to start implementing
My concern is that she thought it was wise and/or safe to have a guy she barely knew meet her at her place of residence in order to pick her up on the first date. NO. NO. NO. NEVER and I do mean NEVER allow someone whom you barely know to know where you reside. If you don't want to drive then you take an Uber. Your first date should be during the day in an open and public place b/c you don't know what type of man you will encounter. Never bring that person back to your house b/c many women have been murdered/kidnapped/r*ped/sex trafficked for being naive, too nice, accommodating, too laid back and trusting when first meeting a man. Always let a friend or family know that you're going on a date, your location, time, and his picture along with your dates info. This is for your PROTECTION and SAFETY ladies.
It's proper foolishness to think that a guy that had you pay for your own mean and gas is capable of treating you right
Love you Chloe ❤️
I believe that having high standards prevents you from succumbing to low value people and experiences, although it may mean you have less interactions overall. Having bottom of the barrel, scraps, or breadcrumb standards means your “dating pool will be bigger”, but you will have men disrespecting you, begging you for sex after they just met you, and getting angry when you’d prefer him to pay the bill. I’ve spent enough time dating immature, lazy men out of boredom and loneliness that I have now learned being with a traditional man with good character is the only kind of relationship I want, otherwise I’ll stay single. Ladies PLEASE do not give yourself away for Free.99. Men in other cultures do pay for everything and will move mountains to please you. You are worth more than some immature little boy in a grown man’s body.
This comment is everything 👏🏽👸🏽❤️
❤❤
Best comment!❤︎
Role Reversal is a woman’s life sentence with no parole. I’ve learned that a young woman can’t understand having standards or worth if it has never been taught. I saw the whole video and it is truly distasteful how she is tolerating his behavior but also how she can’t relieve it wasn’t in her best interest to go out with him.
Life sentence without parole 🤣
Yes my mother was ALWAYS the bread winner and didn't require much from the men she dated. I ended up being the same way with my relationships in my 20s. Wasted my time and energy. Now in my 30s, picking up the pieces.
You can't love a man out of his dustiness. You can't inspire a man to be ambitious with your own ambitions ladies. Chloe!!You are heaven sent. ❤
Especially when the mother purposely ruined him, so he is not fit for purpose in the real world. It’s best to be aware, spread awareness of convert incest sons to young ladies and yourselves.
Key takeaways: I am the prize, Dusty men aren’t going anywhere, and I am the captain of my own ship!!!!! 👩✈️ 🔑
I love how Chloe teaches and intertwines the principles of humility and grace in her messages!
The thing is these dusties are dangerous. These days you can’t just dismiss them politely, might cost you your life. The best advice is to just smile, dismiss yourself, and BLOCK in this situation.
Exactly!👏🏽x
YES! You have to fortify yourself and become dust repellant!
Well that’s why you don’t talk to them in the first place.
Very true Denai🙌
Absolutely dangerous.
“Hey everyone, Chloe here”. I always smile when I hear this intro.
Do the work ladies. Get therapy, level up your mindset as well as your body. If you need to cut off toxic friends/family, do that. Don’t date until you’ve truly done a deep dive on why you attract certain kinds of men. Make peace with both the good and bad sides of yourself and every aspect of your life will improve. Give to yourself first/set boundaries and just watch how people treat you. I WISH someone had given me this advice when I was a teenager. Listen to Miss Chloe.
@@wordlifefactory1656 I absolutely agree. Writing down what you want is a powerful visualisation tool. Journaling your thoughts and feelings will get everything out of your head and prevent you from oversharing and allow you to focus on change and improvement.
Love this ❤
I would never pay for anything in the first place, the minute he said he needed money she should have ended the whole date.🙄
I was in a relationship with a guy, who barely paid for anything. He'd give me the 'pay now I'll send it to you after' excuse. Of course this never happened... I see where I was wrong in this situation- by allowing him in my presence, I was devaluing myself. Definitely need to do a lot of shadow work to get better because I never want to be in that masculina position ever again🙄
The older men in my family use to say use that as test to make it a last date. Real men will never let a woman even go near her purse on date let alone pull your money out. These are the men that have been taught and learning proper protocols.
It just goes to show that no good can ever come of dealing with a dusty, poverty mindset, looking for a bob-the-builder man
If enough Women would stop going out with these Men or never go out with them again(no 2nd date)…maybe they would self reflect, realize they are the common denominator and try to improve. It does a disservice to all Women when they don’t give honest feedback and/or accept “lowballing”.
I agree 1000%. These men act the way they do because they get away with it. Decades ago it was unheard of for women to be paying for anything on a date, letting alone going back to someone’s place that you just met!!! That was a big no no
@@kathyalex778 Lol..to me it’s like the elephant in the room..like the person who’s breath doesn’t smell too fresh… but no one wants to tell them…you need a mint lol. If after awhile they see they can’t catch any bait with their behavior, they will have to level up or be left out. To the Women I say always choose yourself and be ok with being alone. You gotta stand for something.
I realize now I’m older 35 when I was in my 20s I wanted them to know I’m the shit and I got money and this n that . It only sets u up to get used
I agree it is learned behavior until a person learns something different that they would prefer to do.
This and I don't even have a car!!!
@4:00 It’s like that movie A BRONX TALE.
It’s not about what you say to children, it’s about what they see. You have to lead by example. Period. You cannot expect your children to do something that you cannot do. Who are you? What do you allow?
20 years from now....That is your children. 😑 Do you like what you see? CHANGE. PERIOD.
If WE keep the bar low, then why would men aspire to act like a real man? Somehow (some) women have been convinced that "males" are in short supply, as if there is a "going out of business" sale on men. The "Well at least I gottta man!" way of thinking only leads to a life of gaslighting, stress, manipulation and sorry. Set your standards high and know that you will find someone who meets them.
I read the title... had to sit down! 🤣❤
Stay dust free ladies! 💅🏽💎
Had to edit: 🧹🧹🧹🧹🚮
Men will never appreciate anything you do for them economically, women do, but it’s a mistake to think men are the same.
Glad to hear Chloe's take on this! I was taught that if the man asks you out, he pays, and to bring your own money & transportation in case things go wrong. This girl should have never entertained a man who would ask her for gas money to take her out. And she didn't need to be alone in a car with a strange man who tried to coerce her into sex on the 1st date. He also lied about having children, & she said she didn't want to date a man with kids.
Same here! Never go out with a man with no money in case things go south
I’m confused how she said she was traditional but opened her wallet while interacting with him.
Chiiiiiiiile 😒
I wish all moms would teach their daughters these facts. I wish I have learned these lessons in my 20s or 30s and not my late 40's
I realized the reason my mom never taught me is because she did not know. 😢
I love this channel! Thank you so much Chloe 🥰 your the first one that taught me so many things about feminine and masculine nature. More than I was ever taught at home.
I learned that some things are just in a woman’s nature/design:
1. Women are competitive and comparative by nature. ( this is not inherently a bad thing, I’ve learned that comparison doesn’t have to be that important, it helps me want to level up or see what I truly desire)
2. Women love attention. We also love a man’s attention. I often think of women like flowers, we are beautiful and with a strong, alluring fragrance in order to attract the bees and the birds. Attention/male attention doesn’t have to be a bad thing when it’s balanced with self love, self respect and boundaries.
3. Women repeat what we were taught. We are huge observers and what we see, we do. Sometimes even when it’s not beneficial for us.
4. We as women have the responsibility to vet and select. It’s always has and will be our responsibility when it comes to who we ENTERTAIN.
5. Women need a sense of belonging/nurturing to be healthy. In order to thrive in our femininity. We need to be allowed the safety and freedom to express our feminine nature. We need lots of love, nurturing, warmth, encouragement, affirmation, affection and space.
Men’s nature/design:
1. Men need success/accomplishment in order to be healthy. They need to have something that drives them gives them purpose/allows them to flourish in the masculine. Whether it’s a thriving business, a promotion at work, a successful rap career, an artistic talent or a high ranking position in the service.
2. Men are hunters by nature. It’s in their nature to compete and conquer. They enjoy the chase and they enjoy to win the PRIZE (which is you) or your 🐱.
3. Men want sex! This was the hardest one for me. I had so many negative views centered around this. I have done so much healing and come to understand that. Sex is not a bad thing! If a man is attracted to you he will want to have sex with you. They will do any and everything to get access to that, it’s your job to set the standard to how they will get access to that.
4. Because men are hunters by nature. They will instinctly understand how to get what they want and if they don’t they are taught and socialized to figure it out. If they sense or smell low self esteem or desperation they will see you as “low hanging fruit” and sadly they might (if they are a dusty) take advantage of this.
Great comment! All facts!!
I was just thinking about you! I was thinking “where is my dose of Chloe* gospel?” Lol
I am glad to hear from you.
Oh dear! This is why I always have money on myself while on a date but luckily I never had this situation since I usually met them at a certain location and I drive myself and tell someone about who I am meeting, where I am meeting them and how they look etc.
She sadly played herself, I do hope she learns from this. I never pay on dates, give a man money and I don’t “put out” unless I am ready.
Why can't yall ever spell Chloe's name correctly
@@relleyy I changed it, is your life better now? Did you get the bag? No, ok. But at least I got Chloe’s name correct now lol😑
I think a man with twisted intentions will always see how far he can get over on you. He made no commitment or investment in her, so he doesn't care. She was willing to put out for gas and food. He wanted to see what else would she "put out for" and he didn't mind wasting time to do it.
Because when a man has no problem wasting his own life....he will have no problem wasting yours.
You are absolutely right!
I am glad she made home safe and alive... This could have gone wrong... I hope she finds chanels like this one
Never ever never give them money 🤦🏾♀️ you will regret it
So true …we ladies need to be valued and respected
Too much!!!
Girl I had to clutch my pearls watching this video circling around geesh. She could’ve went out by herself enjoying herself if she had to pay for his gas and her food what in the world. Dudes don’t have pride.
Exactly if you’re going to pay, might as well go out with your girls or go out by yourself. Men who respect themselves do not expect women to pay nor do they act crazy like the guy in the video.
Chile, sometimes they do have pride, it's just placed on the wrong things.
Yep I have an X that owes me $300. But guess what he'll definitely stay out of my life knowing that
Damn,...she paid for his gas and he had the gaul to make her walk home ??? WOW, what type of low grade ninja is he??? I pray for this new generation.
“Men who cannot afford LIFE” 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😝😝😝😝😝🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Future Hendrix!!!😭😭😂😂
I can’t tell you how much you’ve changed my life Chloe ❤️ what a blessing and breath of fresh air you are for women who were never role modeled correct feminine behavior. Thank you from the bottom of my heart ❤️
❤️
Your channel has been more helpful to me than most relationship coaches have. Thank you for teaching logic and dispelling mainstream rhetoric.
I just loove that God has blessed us with Chloe x
Basically your own happiness is up to you and the decisions you make. No man can make you do anything you do not want to do. Stop giving all the power, all the choice and all the time in the world for men to make you out to look like a desperate fool. 🤷🏽♀️
New subscriber thanks for this my adopted momma's husband died so I don't know some of these things but im not this soft. I woulda opened the door for him and tripped him on the way out
I’m always looking forward to learning from you Chloe 🥰
Much love, goddess. Your words are deeply appreciated
When respect is not being served,get up and Leave.....
.
I feel like Johnny Depp vs Amber Heards case moved a mob of pickmes.
Same!!!
Nah she's actually really an abuser. I do however hate that bc of her lies people are calling out now toxic femininity when it's really just narcissism and she's making it alot harder for women that do get abused.
*The good thing is at least she DOES have money to pay. Imagine how this could've really gone left field. She is still young and hopefully learned from this as this is a teachable moment for women all over. You must get to know these dudes BEFORE you decide to go out with them. Preferably, they need to invest first. Then you decide the time, and only go out in the daytime to public places. Always drive or better yet take Uber. Have your own money, drop the location for a friend or family member to know where you are at all times and know the exits and where the bathroom is. WOMEN MUST KNOW THE GAME!!!*
That poor girl needs to watch Chloe_
I would rather go blind.
Well tell them how you REALLY FEEL! Much needed and we'll received. Thank you!
I'm not even finished the video yet and I just want to give you your flowers now sis! 💜🌺🌼🌹💮🌸! This was a whole WORD.💯 My backstory is I am 52 yrs old and it's honestly been a lifetime lesson for me. When I saw this story I was so sad. Thank you so much for doing this work for our community real talk. The part about "generational curses", THAT PART! AMEN AND AMEN AGAIN! Thank you for making my spirit smile. God bless 💜💜
She doubled down on her entertaining him still on another creator's page. She is definitely in her masculina.
Future Hendrix be rasing some of these dusties 😆 😆
Valentines the first day got too many to pleasee
❤ So much wisdom 👏 Thank you Chloe
Wonderfully, put Chloe. This video reminds us that we as ladies have a responsibility in determining our self worth and we have the power of choice.
I love all of your content. Please continue inspiring us with your throughly researched, intentional, and gracefully put work!
Love from FLA ♥️
Why she didn’t end the date ? No idea. I would of never allowed a stranger to pick me up from my home in the first place
I remember seeing what happened to that young lady, and all I can do was SMDH. SHE paid for the date and the gas, and HE had the audacity to expect “dessert” and had a temper tantrum like a little toddler when he didn’t get it. I wanted to shake that woman because she’s young and very pretty, so she would have a very easy time attracting and getting a provider man.
I see this a lot with younger women where they feel like they have to be 50-50 and lead with their financial success. This attracts nothing but men looking for a “sugar mama” and men who are looking for a “Barbara the Builder” to improve their financial status so they can get the woman they really want.
Chloe, please keep doing your work on educating young women.
Chloe_ no lies detected. Thank you! 👏🏽👏🏽👏🏽
Can't pay don't play
Jeez...haven't been on IG in a min...& it looks like I haven't missed anything AT ALL!
I have recently realised that those who will hang a woman like this quicker than the Roadrunner running from Coyote treat THEMSELVES with the same harshness AND have done the same!!!!!. I have been there. Those who live in the truth of their healed feminine energy will simply softly tell her to question her actions, offer her compassion and remind her to listen to her intuition....Because Madam 'Billpayer' knew deep down inside....this aint right....Let's offer ourselves so much compassion that the 'automatic' response to shame the actions of this woman becomes a very unattractive response...Thank you Chloe for your guidance ...
Love this ⬆️❤. Too many women saying "Why would she do that?" or "I could never". Judging and shaming her is def not the way!
Hi Chloe, My last comment which was intended for this video, somehow, ended up on your Frienimies Video. Nevertheless, Thank you for your acknowledgement.
I have shared your videos with all of my Nieces. Unfortunately,they aren't listening as I stressed the importance of Breaking the Generational Curse, especially coupled with the fact that they all have Children..ie Girls !! I can only hope they wake up and get the message and pass this Wisdom on to their little girls !! Thank you Chole for your unmatched Wisdom !! 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰
@@theorderofthebees7308 Yes, I hope they wake up before time runs out. Thank you 😊
Well said Chloe_ 👏💯
..... future Hendrix😂😂😂
That's me. I learned this way of dating from my mom. My mom settled. My dad is dusty. ☹
This is so true and this video is much needed. Thank you!
👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾.
Here early and loving it!
Did She say "Struggle lambs"?.... Lol
The dusti tried to con me out of some money and I stood my ground and didn't give in
😩 Not a struggle lamb 🐑 🐺
Leave it to Aunty Chloe to give us the pep talks we need to hear, not what we want to hear.💓
That guy is disgusting 🤢 🤮
Wow. The gems in this one. Chloe_ is back with rare form. Part of me prays prays prays for black women to start knowing their worth and understanding their black woman magic. But I’m also focused on unlearning my own poor modeling and I gotta stay on track, focused with my energy light. Still a little prayer. Cuz these dusties getting away with too much. Let it be a lesson for her. Hopefully she finds this channel and others and never ever do these things again.
This is right I'm a broke guy and I seen this
Damn! 💯💯
It was the 'menergy' for me, Chole!
This is what happens when young women try to “prove” themselves to a man a lot of these feminists agree with 50/50. But idky they would think that is a date…
I’m not sure if that’s how this young lady was thinking or if it was lack of self esteem and speaking up. Either way to me the whole scenario is a red flag. Im 33 and I never met a man who called a 50/50 split a “date”. I knew there are guys who agree with this concept but good luck with being cherished by that energy.
I’ll pray for the girls who subscribes to this thinking especially if you subscribe and STILL want the benefits of a feminine woman.
I had a crazy talk of offer proposal couple days ago a guy I been seeing who has ghosted me …. Asked me if we can be together he wants to grow and build with me. Yet this entire time he’s never treat me right and our relationship is good when we r together but not good no communication when we are apart he works down the road etc an now What’s to move in together. But I think he lost his job he is getting kicked out of the apartment he’s a room mate on couch not on the lease but if they see he’s not working So how are they going let him stay ??? He told me he’s now ready to build and be with me and the reason why is because he has completely lost everything he only has him and a bag of clothes …. Lol 😂 so what do u have to offer me within the situation u are in ? I asked he didn’t have a explaining he hasn’t said nothing back. Exocet a couple gibberish words
So he wants to stay together but wants me to move out my parents house where I’m saving growing building and I run a business in my 1600 sw foot top of the house and I’m only child home my brothers left. So our home is paid my car is paid i have minimal bills
Gems 💎
So sad because she really should've took herself on a date instead .
What is she say after poor family background?
Why you can't love a man out of his dustiness?????? The title threw me.
Future Hendrix 🤣
122k wow 🤩
Hi Chloe_ 👋🏽
Amazing content.
You need to get paid for your commentary..Wow ..valuable ..Never to late to learn....life lessons
I'm here early, will come back to comment after watching the video
0:46 which is why you need to subscribe to this channel
Or the son sees the same thing many men coming n paying so he thinks woman will pay sleep around too just like his mom did
I made a lot of mistakes, is it too late for me?? I want to be better, to make better choices.
Hey 🤗 yes, you can still make better choices. Don't beat yourself up and be patient with your progress. I wish you all the best, I know you will do great xx
@@nyaholorunda7167 Thank you ❤🙏🏾 I'll make sure of it
@@thateastafricangoddess ❤️❤️