Everything stated is so trueee! Passive Men = Lack of Plans, Lack of Preparation, and absolutely Lack of Purpose!! Do not choose "lack" for your life ladies.
Sounds like men I’ve dated. The dreamers too lazy to pursue their goals, the ones who didn’t stand up to their overbearing mother, the ones with no ambition who resented me for having ambition, the smooth talkers, & the ones trying to play on my sympathy. This was eye opening! ❤
My neighbor had a husband like this. He was not goal driven at all. He only wanted to work a low paying job and only wanted to work 8 hours a day (never took overtime)! My neighbor is a go getter and eventually dropped him. He is now avoiding marriage with his current girlfriend. SHE gave HIM an engagement ring and she pays for trips to the islands for the two of them!!! The new girlfriend sees a reward in him being her puppet. There is no hypergamous reward in a lazy puppet . 👁👁
An old boyfriend would keep mentioning a certain piece of equipment that could lead to him being his own boss, but he wouldn't buy it. He knew about it long before we met, and he made good money but he didn't manage it well (unable to delay gratification). I make decent money but I'm thrifty and I invest. I quickly realized that he was hoping for me to purchase the equipment for him! Of course I didn't, but I remember him saying that he didn't like for "people(females) to bring up whenever they did something for him "! He was trying to low key train me! Boy was I thrilled to block him!!
I’m submissive too, until they start abusing me. My next man will be sweet, and healthy and want a wife and a friend. No more Scorpio’s, worst experiences last 3 guys. F that
Wow you described my ex-husband. Young ladies do not know how to look for this as we don't want men who are too aggressive. Passive was viewed as nice until the Passive aggressive behavior showed up as well as a lack of a backbone. It's exhausting making all the decisions, feels like a woman is married to a child.
@@Realybean don't act on emotion. If you decide you want to leave you can take your time and come up with a plan. Build a strong support system. It will get hard when you leave and you might not recognize your husband he might turn cold. Work on yourself and making your esteem stronger.
This video also describes my ex-husband perfectly (it’s actually uncanny!). The divorce became official last month. Younger hypergamous ladies, the tips that you are receiving in this video are gold! This type of men initially appear as nice and one day you wake up and realize you’ve become the man in the relationship. Do not be fooled.
This is my ex-husband. I used to be attracted to passive men that I could control, but I quickly realized that I could never respect a passive man because I had to take the lead with everything and that got played out quickly. I had to go to therapy to learn how to release my need for control and learn how to allow a man to be a man. I’m still a work in progress but I’m more conscientious of my choices. Women we definitely need to heal in order to make better choices ❤ 🤗
We mistake these passive men for "nice guys" all the time. Thank you for concisely outlining the red flags for us as we tend to ignore them for some reason.
Should look for a man that is kind not nice. There's a big difference. However, most females will choose the "bad boy" in their prime years because it's exciting and fun even though they know it is not healthy or safe.
A man that lacks purpose has nothing to lose, therefore making him dangerous. Unfortunately, there is a disproportionate amount of guys out there that are like this. Be careful ladies! Edit: I’ve dated passive men and it was a living nightmare. I will never make that mistake again.
Lord forgive me, but my dad is like this. He got lucky by joining the military when he was flunking out of college, but he is definitely still passive. He’s not protective and he never wants to try harder to make more money for our family. Granted, we have never struggled financially, but it’s still sad. It’s also hard for me to date because I don’t want a man like this. I love my dad, but I just can’t be with someone like him 😔
Me too I have a dad like that And I don't want to end up with a man like that I can see how it affects my mother and their relationship in general I mean respect from my mom it's gone And the way unprotected my mother feels It's disheartening 😢
Likewise here. My father is someone who will barely do the bare minimum in life. He's 78 now and "retired" after being laid off more than twenty years ago, far earlier than he was eligible for retirement, leaving my mother responsible for their finances. It's when I learned how hard it can be on a woman to have a man in her life who is lazy and passive.
Omg girl this is my dad. Listening to this video was heartbreaking because like you, I do love my dad. He was my hero back when I was a child. however, now that I’m older and understand the game I realize that he has definitely failed my mother, my sister and I. I just hate to think about sometimes. He basically just sailed through life aimlessly being sheltered by my mother’s ambition. Now my sister is married to a military man who is also passive and puts his mother before my sis and my niece.
We have the same father. He's 77 and retired now and does absolutely nothing while my mom (67 and also retired) still makes sure bills are paid, spends time with her grandson, gets groceries, cooks, cleans, etc. She really got the short end.
Perfect timing, recently two men were asking a friend if i was single and they both put ZERO effort into making me their girlfriends they kept asking if i was in a relationship but when it came down to talking to me it was like they expected me to do everything like no i know my worth!
This men are soooooo lazy they want us to do everything immediately dey show little interest, it irritates me and that's y I don't date,lazy males everywhere who don't want to put in the work I'd rather continue being single
Spot on. I knew an individual who did the exact same thing! He would become enraged by me always referring to him as a friend, and expected me to know that he "is in love with me" and wanted a relationship, even though he couldn't decide what to do on any given day. Once I clearly saw the madness and I started to withdraw from the friendship, then came the manipulation, apparent death of family members and pets - to reel me back in. Absolutely incredulous. At the first sign of this, RUN ladies❗️
They always have a sob story. Yes! That's the one that sticks out most to me. I've experienced that before. What a pain. And they start that crap early too....like the first or second date. But then they're the same ones who complain about "bitter" women harping on past disappointments. Sir, you're doing the SAME thing!!!! 😅
This one Jamaican guy my sister set me up with on the FIRST DATE he's crying about how he's missing his son, showing me pictures and how his first wife left him so now he's not able to get his Visa...of course red flags went off to me like no, sir, you not about to reel me in just to help you become legal - get somebody else to do it.
Perfect timing! Yes, these men are perfect on paper but real life draining 😩 VERY feminine women won’t be able to rest in their femininity at all! That spot WILL be taken by HIM and you will find yourself more aggressive than usual as a result. I thought I was getting a soft, caring, nice guy in touch with HIS feminine side but he wanna be on mine too! 😂 It’s a gradual seduction killer and you will be promoted from girlfriend to full time mother.
Yesssss! Listen attentively ladies. The passive man is as dangerous as an extremely aggressive man. Even more so as they deceive, camouflage, manipulate and gaslight well. They are fully aware of their shortcomings and instead of doing the necessary work to heal and walk in their masculinity, they are happy being the victim as they are accustomed and addicted to the attention it brings, starting from childhood. Witnessing first hand the warped dynamic of a passive man (almost 40) and his parent was fascinating. Run ladies and stay safe❗️
I know a guy who is constantly posting his wife's achievements promoting her events and even attending her awards as a plus one. Never posted what he does for work or attaching himself to a money making venture, before this he was promoting some pyramid schemes to earn a living. Red flag 1: Positioning himself as the quiet background supporting husband and displaying to the world his woman is the financial muscle there. 2. Always posting success quotes from motivational speakers and other successful entrepreneurs, living vicariously through other successful men and giving the impression he's on their same level. 3. Social media display; His wife always posting her work and achievements which is good but on his page only photo shots and road trips with some "woke captions" .
I broke up with my ex because he got fired from his job after being caught smoking weed and when I asked him what’s his goals he said he was ok working temp jobs for the rest of his life. He was in his late 20’s with no goals while I was in my early 20’s when I was dating him with goals. I’m 27 now and I’m currently dating a man who is ambitious and works to reach his goals.
Nice to read you found a man who probably also has a decent bankaccount or will have one in the future because I believe that’s the only reason you females find this “goal” thing so important, to be able to hide behind someone with “goals” because you don’t have any yourself. Succes is a broad term and can be applied to almost anything, any man can feel successful and view himself as such, it’s not up to you to define to a man what succes is, its a matter of perception, if I was paralyzed and I worked very hard and succeeded to get on my feet and walk again, that’s called s-u-c-c-e-s in my book also, bottom line is, we men aren’t obligated to live up to your expectations.
Passive men are so hateful and vindictive after awhile. They're quick to get their backs up at the slightest suggestion that someone is onto their passivity game or they quickly throw other people under the bus in order to keep their cushy, passive existence going. I really despise weak, hateful passive men.
My sister's ex was like this. I even fell for thinking he was nice, but honey whenever she came to him with money problems (they lived together) the claws came out and his tongue could cut like a sword. Such visceral nasty energy.
A man who’s has nothing to gain and more to lose is a dangerous man.Never enter or entertain a poor relationship with a man who see you as a stepping stole than a deserving woman. A man who is passive will pull you down a crush every moment of your happiness,growth and any connection to his pipe dream and reality.
My daughter's father gave me signs 2 months into dating... I took him for a man of his word (gift of the gap). 8 years later, he's achieved everything he said he would except marrying me, the mother of his child, who encouraged him to follow his dreams (because "I'll hold us down baby") and supported them unconditionally. Lately, he's growing very entitled. I don't appreciate it. I feel like such a fool because his kindness is a shield for all the crap he's been through but my traumatized self read that sentimentally now I'm stuck with conflicting values and even more trauma bonding. Only God can turn this around for me. Thank you, Chloe. This was helpful still.
I worked with a man like this and for some reason I could smell laziness, mama boy and I just knew I this is someone I could never protect me and I could never depend on him. It’s funny how I was able to smell this without dating him. Woman intuition is powerful 👌🏾
Yes, he indeed chose his mother over me and his children. His mom always avoided family gatherings that included the kids and myself and would cancel last minute or not answer the phone. My ex husband would visit her on his own without us frequently, and the moment he walked all of a sudden they were together everyday. It was strange and still is strange.
Number 2 is so true. And what they do first is get you to fall hard for them first, then the sob stories start. Then you end up feeling obligated to help them. I've had the 'I lost my job, can't pay my rent,' etc etc... It's such a turn off, especially when they don't return the favor. If you need money, they may give you but expect you to pay them back. Dating men who you're financially doing better than is always a headache.
Got divorced after putting up with this man for 12 years. Now I have a son and because I thought my son deserved better I left. After therapy I understand that I too deserve better. After 12 years he never even got a car 🤢 🤮. Told me at the beginning of us dating “I planned everything and he wants to be more spontaneous” that should have been a huge red flag but I didn’t know any better! So glad 🎉to have found you Khloe because you were my first teacher in femininity. Now I’ve evolved a lot and hoping to break generational curses from my line through working on my femininity and choosing a better man to allow me and my son to learn the proper ways ❤
Yes. He needed to choose me and he didn’t. Now his mother tells my mother she wished she would have butted out because now he is unwed and she has no grand children and he is still living at home.
I’ve waited a long time for a video on the “Passive Man”. I was with a passive/passive aggressive man for four years. It was the most draining experience of my life. I definitely mistaken him for the “nice guy” only to find out he was not nice at all. I wasn’t very knowledgeable at the time of how deep passive aggression went. Chloe hit the nail on the head with the traits. There are tons of videos on narcissism but not enough on passive/passive aggressive people. This video really resonated with me because it is true to the T!
Sheesh. This is a good one. I have definitely dated this type of guy before. It’s a very frustrating experience. Some of them are good guys but they don’t recognize their blind spots. I need to put myself in better environments to meet better quality men
This is what I’m working on right now. Because I’m naturally nurturing, I tend to attract men like this. In fact, my first two serious relationships were with men like this, and both of them ended in a pile of resentment and wasted time. I’m doing a lot of work before I dip my toe into the dating pool again, because I am not interested in going through that a third time.
I have never heard of this term until now. I dated one for over a year. This video described his character to a T. I couldn’t keep going because I was exhausted and was super turned off to have to be in the masculine energy all the time. When I broke it off, he showed his true color by sending nasty text to me. I couldn’t blocked him fast enough.
Chloe_ is right on with this video. I was in a relationship with a guy who actually said his goal is to have a job where he’s home at 2pm everyday so he can play with his kids after they come home from school because his father never had time for him. Of course I was naive and saw this as cute but thank God I have high value uncles I can discuss anything with who pointed out that no successful corporate job closes at 2pm and entrepreneurs rarely ever leave at 2pm every day. And of course he checked all of the things mentioned in this video.
@LoveE This is probably a perfect, text-book example of a man (or *ANY* person for that matter) who has put the chart before the horse... and who should not be having children or starting a family. And not because he is a "bad person", per se... but simply because he cannot afford to have or start one. This is a double-edged blade that cuts both ways: Yes... I understand dude wants to be with his kids and family... but, that is what wives and (especially) grandparents are for: they stay home and watch the kids while daddies go to work. And, perhaps most important of all... if you are having to work 10+ hours a day by sheer necessity just to support your family with the bare minimum essentials & necessities... than that is a hint and half that you cannot afford a family and should have never started one in the first place.
I was married to a passive man that always allowed himself to be groomed by older “successful” men and was absolutely spineless when it came to outside influences. Everything in this video is spot-on. So glad I left!
Good for you, love. Good luck! Men like this will think there's nothing wrong with their behavior when women stay. Or they know it's wrong and disrespect the woman who puts up with it.
Wow , this video came in perfect timing. I’ve been dating a man that is extremely passive. Almost 3 months now , and I can’t do it anymore. At first I didn’t realize it but it’s actually a turn off not to mention he has me by 10 years older. I feel like I’m settling at this point 🤦🏽♀️
Crazy I went through this same experience too a couple months ago. I’m 26 he is 36. At first I felt guilty for judging his situation because I thought how are you so “comfortable” at this age but there was this undeniable feeling in my stomach I couldn’t shake until I ended the relationship. I knew I made the right decision.
Sis, the good news is you are not legally bound or attached (I hope) to this guy. You need to simply let him know that you all’s relationship/situation is not working out, as you feel that you each want different things in life. You want a man who is sure of and actively pursuing goals. He wants a woman who will tell him what his goals are and actively pursue them for him. Total turn off. 👎🏾 🤮
@@yourroyallioness6607 you’re so right. Not to mention he’s a 45 year old mamas boy. He even compared a situation that I address and told why am I questioning him because his mama don’t do that. 🤦🏽♀️ plus he only been single a year after a divorce. I know major red flags 🚩 right . He literally has no back bone, thank god no attachment !
Yep, I've met plenty of them and unfortunately dated way too many of them. Recently I had a male tell me he lives pay check to pay check and his financial plan is to marry and have his wife both motivate him and rely on her funds for stability for the family! That's insane!
"Oh Beautiful Dreamer" NOT! I, too, had to learn to distinguish between operational plans and aspirational ambitions when listening to a man. Important discernment.
Yes I have dated this.. He was a ‘nice passive guy’ and was cool at first. . But after the 1st date, he couldn’t/wouldn’t plan another date… He kept saying, ‘I’ll go wherever you want’.. . I said, ‘Well let me know when you to this park/farms market… He didn’t show up.. . So he was like, ‘I like spontaneous woman, I can’t be told even & where to go’… You are too ‘traditional’.. . Even told me ‘dinner dates’ come with time & I I have to be patient… (He’s a lawyer now) I said, ‘I eat everyday sir’ 😆 . Blocked & deleted immediately 🤷🏽♀️
@@onevenus6040 Yes he wanted me to plan nothing.. . Do ‘FaceTime dates’ (people really think a phone call is a date now 😫)… . And then eventually ask me to his place to ‘chill’.. No dates, no nothing.. . I call it ‘free prostitute’ 🫠😂
My brother is this way. Strangle very passive. Always a sob story, no accountability. He was the favorite, very coddled. He could do no wrong for my mom. Never mind that i did all the work. Now he calls me for large sums of money. It drains your energy. I blocked him.
I had an ex who would just go oooonnn and ooonnn about how he’s not impressed with titles and possessions and degrees etc. like yooooo Funny thing I’m a nurse with a masters and he never finished high school and was earning a small amount of money as a tour guide. He used Christianity as a means to put down successful people, people who make a good salary and he say things like “those things don’t impress me” as if people who do well for themselves are devils. I came to realize now that this man was probably insecure and tried to manipulate me into thinking men with status and money are not good so that he wouldn’t have to compete with them. He tried to create a bad picture about wealthy people to me so that I would only want him because he is holy due to poverty and anyone who is wealthy is wicked. Like wow guys 😂
Funny thing is when we first started talking online he was so impressed with what I do because I believe he had an idea of how much I make and my lifestyle. Later on in the relationship he was like “I’m not impressed by money and titles” 😂 And then when I told him that I wanted to buy a house, he basically talked me out of it and suggested I move in with his mom and pay rent there, in the ghetto. 😢 When we first started talking I didn’t know how much he made I just said I didn’t want to carry family finances and he ignored my statement. I guess he was planning to marry me and later on put all financial responsibility on me while he take a breather
When I asked him about his financial goals in life he told me a bit but after we got into a huge fight. He was like, “why did you spring these questions on me like this; you shouldn’t given me time to prepare my answers, you’re selfish” I was just asking him about his vision and the type of lifestyle he wanted to live. Since he proposed to me over the phone, which I rejected because I wasn’t going to be proposed to like that. It’s a mess ladies. It’s a mess
Worse part about it is the passive aggressiveness. The weakest man I ever met was Haitian and when I tell you I know senior citizens with more fight than he had. It was ridiculous. He was perfectly fine playing the role of a teenager. I think his parents had him brainwashed a little too good.
*I believe you & as a Haitian woman I can tell you, the majority of Haitian mothers "stop breastfeeding" at age 30. The reason why both of my brothers even have wives is because, my dad don't play that, let him find out they not leading their families.*
@@onevenus6040 No 🤦🏾♀️ A woman's breast milk doesn't even last 30 years. She's saying that they're overly dependent and coddled by their mothers, and it usually doesn't let up until they're about 30 years old.
This is my EX, early 30's white guy that made 6 figures At first I was happy to have all the control that way I don't get hurt (learnt the hard way) He resented my very being and I was disgusted he made me play mom every time! I even had to ask him if he ever thought of being gay at any point! Thank God for therapy, never again!
Although I’m a weak man at 44, thankfully I don’t have signs 1-4, but I do have the rest of the signs of being passive. This explains why people, especially women, don’t like me at all. It’s hard being a man. I had my first ever gf at 41 and I ended it after 7 weeks because I was too weak, negative, immature and lacked experience. She was an older Caribbean lady but never told me her age or introduced me to her friends or family. I knew she was embarrassed of me and I ended it so that she can find someone who was much better and would cater her needs. No woman should ever be with a weak man. I decided to give up getting a gf
Never get into a relationship or marry a passive man. By default the child will be passive as well. I've seen it a million times. Don't do it.💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀
Ooo, lawd, the passive chameleon..that's it! My ex husband pretended to be the nice guy who just needed a little help following through with his goals. When the mask came off...girl! I'm free now, but I'm working on forgiving myself for marrying a child. Eventually, he ran back to live with his mommy because he was and still is unable to financially support himself. Thank you for putting this info out there.
Yikes yikes yikes. Thank you Chloe_ right on time. And yes I have dated a man who always choose the other reliable women already in his life over me. I finally left him and his reliability in his female family members all the way alone. Life has been MUCH better ever since. Men are good at lying, the spirit of discernment is so necessary in these dating blvd’s. But I will say, time always tells, you can only play masculine divine or feminine divine for so long before your representative leaves the table and the real you shows up for dinner. Patience in all aspects is truly a necessary virtue. Thanks again Chloe_ keep going. ❤
Very scary men..esp when you realize their dreams are never ending and will never be or have anything concrete to contribute, just words... blaming women for everything, no accountability. I remember we were at a restaurant, changed our minds right after the order and decided to go to another restaurant. He would not go back in and cancel the order but made me do it. No boundaries, mom, family can walk all over him. Would never communicate, expect me to read his mind.., wanted to buy property, apparently offered a promotion, didn't take it to focus on business dreams going nowhere.. I was expected to buy property essentially for him since he couldn't get himself together ...passive aggressive asf...my God you describe this to a T!! Thank God I ran!
Lmao🤣😂😂 I clicked on this video so fast! I've attracted mainly passive men my entire life. I feel like I'm much better at spotting them now than I was before. But I feel like I have to be especially careful since I tend to have a strong attraction to "nerdy" guys as the majority of them tend to be chronically passive. I would love to experience being with a guy who is more assertive just so I can know what it's like for once in my life lol.
I agree with you as many "nerds" are typically passive. The last thing I need is a man who leads a sedentary lifestyle he didn't choose, uneventful & boring, and very little life experience. I consider myself too "worldly wise" for that kind.
There was a guy who I was interested in. He later ghosted me when we graduated and transferred to a four year college (the same college). Looking back, he came across as someone who uses others for his advantage, doesn’t approach the women he’s interested in, a ‘nice guy’, brags and very self-centered, major momma’s boy. Rejection is God’s redirection.
When I first started this video I was just listening for info. As I listened through all of the signs I realized this was spot on for someone I let go! 🤦🏽♀️
I had a guy I knew from college try and connect with me. He was definitely passive. He was still hurt by his ex wife and he was renting a room from a church member. He worked from home and was content with the way he was living at his big age of 53.🙄
Can a passive man change? I've been treated like a child by my parents all my life, i had no friends or guys around to practice competing for something, so i grew up not be seen trying for something, since i was the smart kid too everything had to be easy. Ao ive reached a point where i feel I'm passive, indecisive, and not an expert in anything. Could i ever change? I get too much anxiety by thinking and trying to be a "man" , it's like im not built for this.
Anyone can CHANGE with a williness to grow and UNLEARN. But as a man, you'll need Healthy Male Mentoring by a man that you want to BECOME. Never ask to be mentored by a Woman as a Man. Hope that helps.
In regards to #1 they don’t want to deal with confrontations. It’s a lose lose situation for us. They can’t communicate issues so they begin to hate you due to their own dealings and once they blow up they’ll also accuse you that the whole time they have to walk on egg shells as an excuse that they can’t talk to you about anything. Also they’ll waste your time and effort you put in to the relationship because they’re too chicken sht cowards to end it themselves. Walk away and do what men do, provide no reasoning. That way the next woman will pick it up too and act accordingly. Don’t let these men fine tune their selfishness
As a 54 yr old man I can 100% agree with everything you said . But don't make this mistake thinking just because a man is quite and seem a push over means he's weak .
Yes ...my husband is too attached to his mom and sister who are not good to me...he insults me infront of them to please them and never supports me...that's why I have decided to do things for my own and let these pigs disturb my peace... basically keeping myself busy and work on myself
Chloe, SO spot on 🎯! Experienced this with the now, second ex spouse. Keep up the amazing work! If I'd know some of the things you've presented, perhaps I'd REALLY be living my dream(s). Trying to get a beautiful, intelligent, nineteen year old to understand these basics before she's "bum-rushed!" 😒
The passive aggressive behavious is crazy and the you can feel their energy , my nervous system went crazy when i was around him , i was anxiously attached so i thought that was à good Sign! O boy did i learn à Lesson 😅 😂 If you heal your feminine energy you Will choose a Healthy masculine man ! And your nervous system Will feel safe around him
How are you describing my ex with such precision? He wanted me to lead so bad! While also respecting him. 😂 and when I stayed home after our son was born…BIG ISSUE
A Passive Man Is Truly A Man I HATE… The Crying Poor Me If I shad Better Parents If I Grew Up Like You If I Was Told To Go To College It’s Always If I Had They Can’t Get Past Themselves To Make Life Work For Them Poor Me Baby…
I let go off a passive man. Full of ideas no real plan. Stated one day, “I’m would hope my partner helps me advance or excel in my current field. Thats how I know she’s the one. That’s the blue print on how to love me”. Had a difficult time “expressing his emotions”.. only when i’d walk away is when i’d know how he felt about me & this last time I definitely found out. Everything was everyone else’s fault from his ex to his mom. My only regret is I didn’t leave him alone sooner. I just know I’m the bad guy to everyone tuned in listening to his sob stories.
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This was such an important video. Thank you Ms Chloe 😊💗
Everything stated is so trueee! Passive Men = Lack of Plans, Lack of Preparation, and absolutely Lack of Purpose!! Do not choose "lack" for your life ladies.
Great way to put this!
Amen.
💯💯💯💯💯
Amen!
Perfectly said! 💯
This video explains accurately why I am very suspicious of "nice guys". They talk a big game, but execution is zero. Scammers Dem😒🍵
😂😂😂
Sounds like men I’ve dated. The dreamers too lazy to pursue their goals, the ones who didn’t stand up to their overbearing mother, the ones with no ambition who resented me for having ambition, the smooth talkers, & the ones trying to play on my sympathy. This was eye opening! ❤
Facts
Told a guy once to speak to a therapist, when he started the blame game about his ex.
Literally the last guy I dated. NEVER making that mistake again.
Yep!!!
My neighbor had a husband like this. He was not goal driven at all. He only wanted to work a low paying job and only wanted to work 8 hours a day (never took overtime)! My neighbor is a go getter and eventually dropped him. He is now avoiding marriage with his current girlfriend. SHE gave HIM an engagement ring and she pays for trips to the islands for the two of them!!! The new girlfriend sees a reward in him being her puppet. There is no hypergamous reward in a lazy puppet . 👁👁
😳
Can she take me on trips to the Islands too👀 🤣
So basically she's the MAN of the house 🤷🏽♀️
Oh never would I want a passive man.😮 The most I may do is help him pick his clothes.😊
Not all men will be successful. Why do women treat average men so poorly….not all men are passive. Not all men will be rich!
An old boyfriend would keep mentioning a certain piece of equipment that could lead to him being his own boss, but he wouldn't buy it. He knew about it long before we met, and he made good money but he didn't manage it well (unable to delay gratification). I make decent money but I'm thrifty and I invest. I quickly realized that he was hoping for me to purchase the equipment for him! Of course I didn't, but I remember him saying that he didn't like for "people(females) to bring up whenever they did something for him "! He was trying to low key train me! Boy was I thrilled to block him!!
Same thing happened to me !! The way I left him so quick
OMG! The way some of their brains are set up sounds like they shouldn't even be dating!
@@briana14333 at all!
I could never like a passive man because I'm naturally submissive. I like gentle, but dominant men.
Me too
I’m submissive too, until they start abusing me. My next man will be sweet, and healthy and want a wife and a friend. No more Scorpio’s, worst experiences last 3 guys. F that
Wow you described my ex-husband. Young ladies do not know how to look for this as we don't want men who are too aggressive. Passive was viewed as nice until the Passive aggressive behavior showed up as well as a lack of a backbone. It's exhausting making all the decisions, feels like a woman is married to a child.
I was going to say… this sounds like my husband and I’m just done… but I have an 8-Month Old and I don’t know what to do.
@@Realybean don't act on emotion. If you decide you want to leave you can take your time and come up with a plan. Build a strong support system. It will get hard when you leave and you might not recognize your husband he might turn cold. Work on yourself and making your esteem stronger.
This video also describes my ex-husband perfectly (it’s actually uncanny!). The divorce became official last month. Younger hypergamous ladies, the tips that you are receiving in this video are gold! This type of men initially appear as nice and one day you wake up and realize you’ve become the man in the relationship. Do not be fooled.
You all describe my soon to be ex husband wow
This is my ex-husband. I used to be attracted to passive men that I could control, but I quickly realized that I could never respect a passive man because I had to take the lead with everything and that got played out quickly. I had to go to therapy to learn how to release my need for control and learn how to allow a man to be a man. I’m still a work in progress but I’m more conscientious of my choices. Women we definitely need to heal in order to make better choices ❤ 🤗
We mistake these passive men for "nice guys" all the time. Thank you for concisely outlining the red flags for us as we tend to ignore them for some reason.
Should look for a man that is kind not nice. There's a big difference. However, most females will choose the "bad boy" in their prime years because it's exciting and fun even though they know it is not healthy or safe.
They love sympathy 🤮🤢 literally makes my skin crawl how they be begging for sympathy and telling sob stories any chance they get.
A man that lacks purpose has nothing to lose, therefore making him dangerous. Unfortunately, there is a disproportionate amount of guys out there that are like this. Be careful ladies!
Edit: I’ve dated passive men and it was a living nightmare. I will never make that mistake again.
That is so true...they can get quite dangerous very fast
Girl Same! 😢
This here
YES❗️❗️
Lord forgive me, but my dad is like this. He got lucky by joining the military when he was flunking out of college, but he is definitely still passive. He’s not protective and he never wants to try harder to make more money for our family. Granted, we have never struggled financially, but it’s still sad. It’s also hard for me to date because I don’t want a man like this. I love my dad, but I just can’t be with someone like him 😔
Me too
I have a dad like that
And I don't want to end up with a man like that
I can see how it affects my mother and their relationship in general
I mean respect from my mom it's gone
And the way unprotected my mother feels
It's disheartening 😢
Likewise here. My father is someone who will barely do the bare minimum in life. He's 78 now and "retired" after being laid off more than twenty years ago, far earlier than he was eligible for retirement, leaving my mother responsible for their finances. It's when I learned how hard it can be on a woman to have a man in her life who is lazy and passive.
Same unfortunately but we can choose better partners/husbands!!
Omg girl this is my dad. Listening to this video was heartbreaking because like you, I do love my dad. He was my hero back when I was a child. however, now that I’m older and understand the game I realize that he has definitely failed my mother, my sister and I. I just hate to think about sometimes. He basically just sailed through life aimlessly being sheltered by my mother’s ambition. Now my sister is married to a military man who is also passive and puts his mother before my sis and my niece.
We have the same father. He's 77 and retired now and does absolutely nothing while my mom (67 and also retired) still makes sure bills are paid, spends time with her grandson, gets groceries, cooks, cleans, etc. She really got the short end.
Perfect timing, recently two men were asking a friend if i was single and they both put ZERO effort into making me their girlfriends they kept asking if i was in a relationship but when it came down to talking to me it was like they expected me to do everything like no i know my worth!
Honestly though, why are men like this. Want you to carry conversations and then complain when you're too confident or self assured.
This men are soooooo lazy they want us to do everything immediately dey show little interest, it irritates me and that's y I don't date,lazy males everywhere who don't want to put in the work I'd rather continue being single
@@venda1008 i thought i was going insane i thought maybe i was the drama but i'm not these men want to be chased its embarrasing
Spot on. I knew an individual who did the exact same thing! He would become enraged by me always referring to him as a friend, and expected me to know that he "is in love with me" and wanted a relationship, even though he couldn't decide what to do on any given day.
Once I clearly saw the madness and I started to withdraw from the friendship, then came the manipulation, apparent death of family members and pets - to reel me back in.
Absolutely incredulous. At the first sign of this, RUN ladies❗️
Same here I noticed that too even as for back as b university that claimed interested but put zero effort and as of recent but I paid them dust.
They always have a sob story. Yes! That's the one that sticks out most to me. I've experienced that before. What a pain. And they start that crap early too....like the first or second date. But then they're the same ones who complain about "bitter" women harping on past disappointments. Sir, you're doing the SAME thing!!!! 😅
Yes, sob stories and excuses on why they can’t/won’t progress in life. They’ll attach to a successful women quick. Love bomb the heck out of you.
@@yzma6142 Not anymore. Red flags don't get ignored over here anymore. I don't have time.
This part ❗️❗️🤣🤣
This one Jamaican guy my sister set me up with on the FIRST DATE he's crying about how he's missing his son, showing me pictures and how his first wife left him so now he's not able to get his Visa...of course red flags went off to me like no, sir, you not about to reel me in just to help you become legal - get somebody else to do it.
Passive men can also be successful in their careers but conflict avoid, lazy in courting you and risk avoidant as well
Perfect timing! Yes, these men are perfect on paper but real life draining 😩 VERY feminine women won’t be able to rest in their femininity at all! That spot WILL be taken by HIM and you will find yourself more aggressive than usual as a result. I thought I was getting a soft, caring, nice guy in touch with HIS feminine side but he wanna be on mine too! 😂 It’s a gradual seduction killer and you will be promoted from girlfriend to full time mother.
Yesssss! Listen attentively ladies. The passive man is as dangerous as an extremely aggressive man. Even more so as they deceive, camouflage, manipulate and gaslight well.
They are fully aware of their shortcomings and instead of doing the necessary work to heal and walk in their masculinity, they are happy being the victim as they are accustomed and addicted to the attention it brings, starting from childhood.
Witnessing first hand the warped dynamic of a passive man (almost 40) and his parent was fascinating.
Run ladies and stay safe❗️
I know a guy who is constantly posting his wife's achievements promoting her events and even attending her awards as a plus one. Never posted what he does for work or attaching himself to a money making venture, before this he was promoting some pyramid schemes to earn a living.
Red flag 1: Positioning himself as the quiet background supporting husband and displaying to the world his woman is the financial muscle there.
2. Always posting success quotes from motivational speakers and other successful entrepreneurs, living vicariously through other successful men and giving the impression he's on their same level.
3. Social media display; His wife always posting her work and achievements which is good but on his page only photo shots and road trips with some "woke captions" .
I broke up with my ex because he got fired from his job after being caught smoking weed and when I asked him what’s his goals he said he was ok working temp jobs for the rest of his life. He was in his late 20’s with no goals while I was in my early 20’s when I was dating him with goals. I’m 27 now and I’m currently dating a man who is ambitious and works to reach his goals.
Thank God you got away from him 🙏
Nice to read you found a man who probably also has a decent bankaccount or will have one in the future because I believe that’s the only reason you females find this “goal” thing so important, to be able to hide behind someone with “goals” because you don’t have any yourself. Succes is a broad term and can be applied to almost anything, any man can feel successful and view himself as such, it’s not up to you to define to a man what succes is, its a matter of perception, if I was paralyzed and I worked very hard and succeeded to get on my feet and walk again, that’s called s-u-c-c-e-s in my book also, bottom line is, we men aren’t obligated to live up to your expectations.
🎉🎉👏🏾👏🏾👏🏾
😂😂well, I have worse. I had one tell me his dream job would be to be a dandy.
@bodoor8172 Yet another foolish boy who stays in their feelings all day trying to sound deep when the lady specifically said she had goals herself.
You just described the men in my family 😳😳😳 This explains why I chose guys with similar energies without knowing
Same here, no wonder.
Passive men are so hateful and vindictive after awhile. They're quick to get their backs up at the slightest suggestion that someone is onto their passivity game or they quickly throw other people under the bus in order to keep their cushy, passive existence going. I really despise weak, hateful passive men.
My sister's ex was like this. I even fell for thinking he was nice, but honey whenever she came to him with money problems (they lived together) the claws came out and his tongue could cut like a sword. Such visceral nasty energy.
A man who’s has nothing to gain and more to lose is a dangerous man.Never enter or entertain a poor relationship with a man who see you as a stepping stole than a deserving woman. A man who is passive will pull you down a crush every moment of your happiness,growth and any connection to his pipe dream and reality.
Man, I got triggered watching this. 😂 Thank God those days are OVER! I’m 5 years clean of passive/ dusty men. Lol. Love you Chloe girl!❤
@Chloe_keep helping us #Jesus
I love you too.💕
Five years clean!!! Good for you 🥰
Passive Males LACK PREPARATION, FOR LIFE! SKILLS!....
My daughter's father gave me signs 2 months into dating... I took him for a man of his word (gift of the gap). 8 years later, he's achieved everything he said he would except marrying me, the mother of his child, who encouraged him to follow his dreams (because "I'll hold us down baby") and supported them unconditionally. Lately, he's growing very entitled. I don't appreciate it. I feel like such a fool because his kindness is a shield for all the crap he's been through but my traumatized self read that sentimentally now I'm stuck with conflicting values and even more trauma bonding. Only God can turn this around for me.
Thank you, Chloe. This was helpful still.
I worked with a man like this and for some reason I could smell laziness, mama boy and I just knew I this is someone I could never protect me and I could never depend on him. It’s funny how I was able to smell this without dating him. Woman intuition is powerful 👌🏾
Yes, he indeed chose his mother over me and his children. His mom always avoided family gatherings that included the kids and myself and would cancel last minute or not answer the phone. My ex husband would visit her on his own without us frequently, and the moment he walked all of a sudden they were together everyday. It was strange and still is strange.
My brother is quite attached to his mom however he knows once he get married he will have much more to give to his wife than his mother
"Surrogate husband"
Emotional incest between these disturbed mothers and sons.
Number 2 is so true. And what they do first is get you to fall hard for them first, then the sob stories start. Then you end up feeling obligated to help them. I've had the 'I lost my job, can't pay my rent,' etc etc... It's such a turn off, especially when they don't return the favor. If you need money, they may give you but expect you to pay them back. Dating men who you're financially doing better than is always a headache.
Got divorced after putting up with this man for 12 years. Now I have a son and because I thought my son deserved better I left. After therapy I understand that I too deserve better. After 12 years he never even got a car 🤢 🤮. Told me at the beginning of us dating “I planned everything and he wants to be more spontaneous” that should have been a huge red flag but I didn’t know any better! So glad 🎉to have found you Khloe because you were my first teacher in femininity. Now I’ve evolved a lot and hoping to break generational curses from my line through working on my femininity and choosing a better man to allow me and my son to learn the proper ways ❤
You actually used a vomit emoji just because somebody didn't get a car?
Wow 😂😂
@nackjicholson1940 To not get a car in 12 years though?? Yeah vomit emoji warranted. Some men know how to abuse people’s patience.
Yes. He needed to choose me and he didn’t. Now his mother tells my mother she wished she would have butted out because now he is unwed and she has no grand children and he is still living at home.
I’ve waited a long time for a video on the “Passive Man”. I was with a passive/passive aggressive man for four years. It was the most draining experience of my life. I definitely mistaken him for the “nice guy” only to find out he was not nice at all. I wasn’t very knowledgeable at the time of how deep passive aggression went. Chloe hit the nail on the head with the traits.
There are tons of videos on narcissism but not enough on passive/passive aggressive people.
This video really resonated with me because it is true to the T!
SAME HERE MY FRIEND, I AM IN THIS SAME POSITION AND I DIDNT REALIZE IT... AND STAYED IN IT 13 YEARS,, I AM STILL CURRENTLY GOING THROUGH THIS NOW.
Sheesh. This is a good one. I have definitely dated this type of guy before. It’s a very frustrating experience. Some of them are good guys but they don’t recognize their blind spots.
I need to put myself in better environments to meet better quality men
This is what I’m working on right now. Because I’m naturally nurturing, I tend to attract men like this. In fact, my first two serious relationships were with men like this, and both of them ended in a pile of resentment and wasted time. I’m doing a lot of work before I dip my toe into the dating pool again, because I am not interested in going through that a third time.
I have never heard of this term until now. I dated one for over a year. This video described his character to a T. I couldn’t keep going because I was exhausted and was super turned off to have to be in the masculine energy all the time. When I broke it off, he showed his true color by sending nasty text to me. I couldn’t blocked him fast enough.
Chloe_ is right on with this video. I was in a relationship with a guy who actually said his goal is to have a job where he’s home at 2pm everyday so he can play with his kids after they come home from school because his father never had time for him. Of course I was naive and saw this as cute but thank God I have high value uncles I can discuss anything with who pointed out that no successful corporate job closes at 2pm and entrepreneurs rarely ever leave at 2pm every day. And of course he checked all of the things mentioned in this video.
@LoveE
This is probably a perfect,
text-book example of a man
(or *ANY* person for that matter)
who has put the chart before the horse...
and who should not be having
children or starting a family.
And not because he
is a "bad person", per se...
but simply because he cannot
afford to have or start one.
This is a double-edged blade
that cuts both ways:
Yes...
I understand dude wants to
be with his kids and family...
but, that is what wives and
(especially) grandparents are for:
they stay home and watch the kids
while daddies go to work.
And, perhaps most important of all...
if you are having to work 10+ hours
a day by sheer necessity just to
support your family with the
bare minimum essentials & necessities...
than that is a hint and half
that you cannot afford a family
and should have never started one
in the first place.
I was married to a passive man that always allowed himself to be groomed by older “successful” men and was absolutely spineless when it came to outside influences. Everything in this video is spot-on. So glad I left!
This is my boyfriend to a tee minus a couple things. I am soo over him. I got a job in a new city and gonna leave him soon
Period 🎉 wish you all the best on your new start !
Leave him now lol
Yes, get rid of him! Bravo 👏🏾 to you.
Please leave quietly; DO NOT TELL HIM!
Good for you, love. Good luck!
Men like this will think there's nothing wrong with their behavior when women stay. Or they know it's wrong and disrespect the woman who puts up with it.
Wow , this video came in perfect timing. I’ve been dating a man that is extremely passive. Almost 3 months now , and I can’t do it anymore. At first I didn’t realize it but it’s actually a turn off not to mention he has me by 10 years older. I feel like I’m settling at this point 🤦🏽♀️
Crazy I went through this same experience too a couple months ago. I’m 26 he is 36. At first I felt guilty for judging his situation because I thought how are you so “comfortable” at this age but there was this undeniable feeling in my stomach I couldn’t shake until I ended the relationship. I knew I made the right decision.
Sis, the good news is you are not legally bound or attached (I hope) to this guy. You need to simply let him know that you all’s relationship/situation is not working out, as you feel that you each want different things in life.
You want a man who is sure of and actively pursuing goals. He wants a woman who will tell him what his goals are and actively pursue them for him. Total turn off. 👎🏾 🤮
@@yourroyallioness6607 you’re so right. Not to mention he’s a 45 year old mamas boy. He even compared a situation that I address and told why am I questioning him because his mama don’t do that. 🤦🏽♀️ plus he only been single a year after a divorce. I know major red flags 🚩 right . He literally has no back bone, thank god no attachment !
@@yzma6142 yes. I be feeling guilty. But honestly I know he’s not the man I desire .
@@Shiasospiritual they never have a backbone, Chile lucky you left. You will have to be the man in a relationship with someone like that 😂🤭
Yep, I've met plenty of them and unfortunately dated way too many of them. Recently I had a male tell me he lives pay check to pay check and his financial plan is to marry and have his wife both motivate him and rely on her funds for stability for the family! That's insane!
"Oh Beautiful Dreamer" NOT! I, too, had to learn to distinguish between operational plans and aspirational ambitions when listening to a man. Important discernment.
How?
This explained my narcissist ex to a T. Save yourself the time and pain ladies!! Love yourself and watch everything fall into place
I take peace in knowing I'm not going through this alone. That is a saving grace because these feelings and realizations can be isolating.
Yes I have dated this.. He was a ‘nice passive guy’ and was cool at first.
.
But after the 1st date, he couldn’t/wouldn’t plan another date… He kept saying, ‘I’ll go wherever you want’..
.
I said, ‘Well let me know when you to this park/farms market… He didn’t show up..
.
So he was like, ‘I like spontaneous woman, I can’t be told even & where to go’… You are too ‘traditional’..
.
Even told me ‘dinner dates’ come with time & I I have to be patient… (He’s a lawyer now) I said, ‘I eat everyday sir’ 😆
.
Blocked & deleted immediately 🤷🏽♀️
"Dinner dates come with time?"🤡🤡🤡🤡
@@CiaobellaAmour Yes I have to earn a dinner date.. Now mind you, he was a lawyer.. Nothing like a stingy man, passive man.. It’s the worst..
He was trying to get you to pay for the dates, that's why he didn't want to do any planning.
@@onevenus6040 Yes he wanted me to plan nothing..
.
Do ‘FaceTime dates’ (people really think a phone call is a date now 😫)…
.
And then eventually ask me to his place to ‘chill’.. No dates, no nothing..
.
I call it ‘free prostitute’ 🫠😂
@@trulydorcas lawd
I’ve dated men like this in the past and the description of a passive man is to a T…wow…a very necessary video I will be sending to my nieces😇🥰
My recent ex was just this, the good thing
Is that I recognized it early on and decided to walk away.
My brother is this way. Strangle very passive. Always a sob story, no accountability. He was the favorite, very coddled. He could do no wrong for my mom. Never mind that i did all the work. Now he calls me for large sums of money. It drains your energy. I blocked him.
I had an ex who would just go oooonnn and ooonnn about how he’s not impressed with titles and possessions and degrees etc. like yooooo
Funny thing I’m a nurse with a masters and he never finished high school and was earning a small amount of money as a tour guide.
He used Christianity as a means to put down successful people, people who make a good salary and he say things like “those things don’t impress me” as if people who do well for themselves are devils.
I came to realize now that this man was probably insecure and tried to manipulate me into thinking men with status and money are not good so that he wouldn’t have to compete with them. He tried to create a bad picture about wealthy people to me so that I would only want him because he is holy due to poverty and anyone who is wealthy is wicked.
Like wow guys 😂
Funny thing is when we first started talking online he was so impressed with what I do because I believe he had an idea of how much I make and my lifestyle. Later on in the relationship he was like “I’m not impressed by money and titles” 😂
And then when I told him that I wanted to buy a house, he basically talked me out of it and suggested I move in with his mom and pay rent there, in the ghetto. 😢
When we first started talking I didn’t know how much he made I just said I didn’t want to carry family finances and he ignored my statement. I guess he was planning to marry me and later on put all financial responsibility on me while he take a breather
When I asked him about his financial goals in life he told me a bit but after we got into a huge fight. He was like, “why did you spring these questions on me like this; you shouldn’t given me time to prepare my answers, you’re selfish”
I was just asking him about his vision and the type of lifestyle he wanted to live. Since he proposed to me over the phone, which I rejected because I wasn’t going to be proposed to like that.
It’s a mess ladies. It’s a mess
This was a great video and explanation of a passive man. This is a good video to use in the vetting process when meeting potential suitors.
Agreed 💕
My father has alot of those traits & honestly it's sad 😔
Worse part about it is the passive aggressiveness. The weakest man I ever met was Haitian and when I tell you I know senior citizens with more fight than he had. It was ridiculous. He was perfectly fine playing the role of a teenager. I think his parents had him brainwashed a little too good.
*I believe you & as a Haitian woman I can tell you, the majority of Haitian mothers "stop breastfeeding" at age 30. The reason why both of my brothers even have wives is because, my dad don't play that, let him find out they not leading their families.*
@@ClaireHaire do you really mean that they breastfeed their sons up to the age of 30?
@@onevenus6040 No 🤦🏾♀️ A woman's breast milk doesn't even last 30 years. She's saying that they're overly dependent and coddled by their mothers, and it usually doesn't let up until they're about 30 years old.
No, meaning the mom never stop showing up 😳🤣🤣🤣
@@onevenus6040 She’s making a joke to get her point across.
Chloeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee😍😍😍😍😍hope you can hear me screaming your name. Love your content. South African fan
South African here as well!
Hey glad we both stubbled on the gem that is this channel.😍
So nice to see South African women here hiiiiiiiii
I feel the love. Thank you.💕💕💕
We are here! ❤
This is my EX, early 30's white guy that made 6 figures
At first I was happy to have all the control that way I don't get hurt (learnt the hard way)
He resented my very being and I was disgusted he made me play mom every time! I even had to ask him if he ever thought of being gay at any point!
Thank God for therapy, never again!
Although I’m a weak man at 44, thankfully I don’t have signs 1-4, but I do have the rest of the signs of being passive.
This explains why people, especially women, don’t like me at all. It’s hard being a man.
I had my first ever gf at 41 and I ended it after 7 weeks because I was too weak, negative, immature and lacked experience. She was an older Caribbean lady but never told me her age or introduced me to her friends or family. I knew she was embarrassed of me and I ended it so that she can find someone who was much better and would cater her needs.
No woman should ever be with a weak man. I decided to give up getting a gf
Their only goal is to go home and play games and get carpal tunnel
So true! It’s like living with a roommate you rarely see. The escapism just overtakes them, and they’re just lost to you.
😂
😂😂😂
Yesss! Ole I wanna play Madden and 2K all day looking @$$ 😂😂😂 The dust is real yall...watch out😂 no RUN🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️🏃♀️
Never get into a relationship or marry a passive man. By default the child will be passive as well. I've seen it a million times.
Don't do it.💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀💀
Ooo, lawd, the passive chameleon..that's it! My ex husband pretended to be the nice guy who just needed a little help following through with his goals. When the mask came off...girl! I'm free now, but I'm working on forgiving myself for marrying a child. Eventually, he ran back to live with his mommy because he was and still is unable to financially support himself. Thank you for putting this info out there.
Yikes yikes yikes. Thank you Chloe_ right on time. And yes I have dated a man who always choose the other reliable women already in his life over me. I finally left him and his reliability in his female family members all the way alone. Life has been MUCH better ever since. Men are good at lying, the spirit of discernment is so necessary in these dating blvd’s. But I will say, time always tells, you can only play masculine divine or feminine divine for so long before your representative leaves the table and the real you shows up for dinner. Patience in all aspects is truly a necessary virtue. Thanks again Chloe_ keep going. ❤
Thank you Chloe for always dropping gems for us! In Chloe we trust!!
💕💕💕
Very scary men..esp when you realize their dreams are never ending and will never be or have anything concrete to contribute, just words... blaming women for everything, no accountability. I remember we were at a restaurant, changed our minds right after the order and decided to go to another restaurant. He would not go back in and cancel the order but made me do it. No boundaries, mom, family can walk all over him. Would never communicate, expect me to read his mind.., wanted to buy property, apparently offered a promotion, didn't take it to focus on business dreams going nowhere.. I was expected to buy property essentially for him since he couldn't get himself together ...passive aggressive asf...my God you describe this to a T!! Thank God I ran!
Lmao🤣😂😂 I clicked on this video so fast! I've attracted mainly passive men my entire life. I feel like I'm much better at spotting them now than I was before. But I feel like I have to be especially careful since I tend to have a strong attraction to "nerdy" guys as the majority of them tend to be chronically passive. I would love to experience being with a guy who is more assertive just so I can know what it's like for once in my life lol.
I agree with you as many "nerds" are typically passive. The last thing I need is a man who leads a sedentary lifestyle he didn't choose, uneventful & boring, and very little life experience. I consider myself too "worldly wise" for that kind.
Now you know, love. And can do better for yourself!
Passive, unconfident men turn me all the way off.
There was a guy who I was interested in. He later ghosted me when we graduated and transferred to a four year college (the same college). Looking back, he came across as someone who uses others for his advantage, doesn’t approach the women he’s interested in, a ‘nice guy’, brags and very self-centered, major momma’s boy. Rejection is God’s redirection.
When I first started this video I was just listening for info. As I listened through all of the signs I realized this was spot on for someone I let go! 🤦🏽♀️
My last serious relationship was with a man like this and you described him perfectly.
I had a guy I knew from college try and connect with me. He was definitely passive. He was still hurt by his ex wife and he was renting a room from a church member. He worked from home and was content with the way he was living at his big age of 53.🙄
Can a passive man change? I've been treated like a child by my parents all my life, i had no friends or guys around to practice competing for something, so i grew up not be seen trying for something, since i was the smart kid too everything had to be easy. Ao ive reached a point where i feel I'm passive, indecisive, and not an expert in anything. Could i ever change? I get too much anxiety by thinking and trying to be a "man" , it's like im not built for this.
Anyone can CHANGE with a williness to grow and UNLEARN. But as a man, you'll need Healthy Male Mentoring by a man that you want to BECOME. Never ask to be mentored by a Woman as a Man. Hope that helps.
How do I ensure this is not my son... because it is his dad, and I already worry about this 😔
I thank God for your content Chloe 🙏🏾 this kind of wisdom is not taught in some families including my own, so thank you ❤
I’m divorcing this man. He finally got aggressive and abusive once I left. So gross. Would not recommend.
Yes I was married to one and divorced him and didn’t get pregnant by him
In regards to #1 they don’t want to deal with confrontations. It’s a lose lose situation for us. They can’t communicate issues so they begin to hate you due to their own dealings and once they blow up they’ll also accuse you that the whole time they have to walk on egg shells as an excuse that they can’t talk to you about anything. Also they’ll waste your time and effort you put in to the relationship because they’re too chicken sht cowards to end it themselves. Walk away and do what men do, provide no reasoning. That way the next woman will pick it up too and act accordingly. Don’t let these men fine tune their selfishness
My ex husband was everything you described to a T.
As a 54 yr old man I can 100% agree with everything you said . But don't make this mistake thinking just because a man is quite and seem a push over means he's weak .
Wish we had this video 20 yrs ago frfr
Yes ...my husband is too attached to his mom and sister who are not good to me...he insults me infront of them to please them and never supports me...that's why I have decided to do things for my own and let these pigs disturb my peace... basically keeping myself busy and work on myself
Chloe, SO spot on 🎯!
Experienced this with the now, second ex spouse.
Keep up the amazing work! If I'd know some of the things you've presented, perhaps I'd REALLY be living my dream(s).
Trying to get a beautiful, intelligent, nineteen year old to understand these basics before she's "bum-rushed!"
😒
Chloe coming thru with the gems as usual 👏🏽
passive men are the worst. I'm laughing at your pictures of these men lol
Yes I have dated passive men, and married 1. That is over NOW! It is really a huge turn off to a woman like me because I am ambitious
This was right on point!!!
The passive aggressive behavious is crazy and the you can feel their energy , my nervous system went crazy when i was around him , i was anxiously attached so i thought that was à good Sign! O boy did i learn à Lesson 😅 😂
If you heal your feminine energy you Will choose a Healthy masculine man ! And your nervous system Will feel safe around him
How are you describing my ex with such precision? He wanted me to lead so bad! While also respecting him. 😂 and when I stayed home after our son was born…BIG ISSUE
I think it’s hard for us to hear the truth cuz we still make excuses like we’re in slavery and have no internet
Absolutely spot on!!!!!! Everything that you said in this video is facts. Love this video Thankyou
So accurate I will never again put myself through this foolishness
Wow, you are right on this.
A Passive Man Is Truly A Man I HATE… The Crying Poor Me If I shad Better Parents If I Grew Up Like You If I Was Told To Go To College It’s Always If I Had They Can’t Get Past Themselves To Make Life Work For Them Poor Me Baby…
Thank you, Chloe 💕
Hi Chloe 😘 looking forward to seeing your video.
Used to be my ex's pit bull, was absolutely draining and masculine while he rested in his feminine.
Great video and a timely reminder for myself.❤ Thanks!
Thank god I got myself out of that situation 😤
I’m a bit passive myself sheesh harsh truth I needed tho 💪🏾
She's forensic!
I let go off a passive man. Full of ideas no real plan. Stated one day, “I’m would hope my partner helps me advance or excel in my current field. Thats how I know she’s the one. That’s the blue print on how to love me”. Had a difficult time “expressing his emotions”.. only when i’d walk away is when i’d know how he felt about me & this last time I definitely found out. Everything was everyone else’s fault from his ex to his mom. My only regret is I didn’t leave him alone sooner. I just know I’m the bad guy to everyone tuned in listening to his sob stories.
Came back to rewatch after the Bachelorette divorce video
Hi Chloe!...I've missed you ❤💋
Me too!!
This video was much needed Chloe.😉👌🏽
On point as usual 💥