I learned the latter pretty quickly. Just the lack of reciprocation and effort on their end feels draining. Not saying that because you’re attracted to someone, you’re entitled to a relationship. If it’s not going anywhere, it’s just better to cut your loses for your own sake and sanity.
When a man showers more attention than the woman wants - Clingy behavior When a man gives less attention than the woman wants - emotionally unavailable. You can't win with woman 🤦♂️
1) 0:28 Expecting her to lead 2) 2:52 Neglecting yourself 3:47 Sponsor Ad 3) 4:52 Chronically Online Behavior 4) 7:28 Overly Clingy or Seeking Validation
That "chronically online" bit is pretty serious. I hate being nostalgic, but the days before the internet and social media were way easier on our minds. Now, we're overthinking and over-analyzing everything, because of some crap we heard online.
You can also add to that advent of texting and even mass use of mobile phones in general. Now it's like, if you don't get a response/call back in a couple of hours, it can start making you wonder.
Way too many people these days analyze this stuff to an absurd degree.. they put 5 times the effort into analyzing this stuff thsn they do actually going out and meeting people
Pay close attention to neglecting yourself. It doesn't only mess up the relationship, but when it ends due to that, you're going to be in a position where you have to get back into shape. I took it for granted when I got what I wanted and ended up worse than where I started. But yeah that’s good advice
I saw a young adult couple out at a nice high end restaurant the other day. Both sat looking at their phones at the table. My wife is age 59 and I am 60 and we have been together 40 years but we still can talk for hours without looking at our phones if we are out together.
What you're missing from that picture is that the young couple were probably looking for funny things to show each other and interesting topics to discuss, and you just happened to notice them when their behavior didn't conform to your ingrained expectations.
@@AndrewAung1992 Some Red Pill channels offer valuable warnings and advice, but a person should take care not to become too negative in advance and should give a new woman the benefit of the doubt. You should be discreet in what you say to any new person, not immediately look to start aguments and so on. But 'stay away from those channels?' Ah, no. Given how risky dating is these days, awareness matters. You have to be careful.
@@AndrewAung1992 I've been happily married for five years, and lived with my wife for four years before that, so it's not about me. If you think there's 'nothing wrong with modern women,' you don't seem to have any idea of the sort of culture we live in now. I hope for your sake you don't learn some unfortunate relationship lessons in the future.
I really like that. Chronically online behavior. You can always see that kind of behavior in people, both men and women. I tend to steer clear of these types of people for good reason. Sound advice regarding the topic to unplug from the online matrix!
2 things that I've had women say they appreciate about me is always having a positive attitude. I've also been told I'm very disciplined and dependable.
funny thing is: women know they actually need that. but as long as theres a welfare state to live off...no man needed. until other peoples money is gone for good. like in eastern europe in the nineties.
Love your opinion on validation. A mantra that I hold near and dear to my heart about that is. “ love is not something you look for love is something you become. “
Courtney, I’ve recently gotten back into running and getting in shape and listening to your videos for some reason is much more helpful to me than listening to music. I feel like I gain confidence just listening to your videos and I stand a little taller and feel more confidence in me because I envision the person I want to develop into. Thanks for your videos and it’s great that you respect men and don’t trash talk. I have subscribed. Now time to get back to this run. (:
Another thing that can destroy attraction, rushing things! I’ve learned over time that women need time to get comfortable with a guy and know that he’s trustworthy.
Has a women you ever dated or were interested in banged Chad an hour after meeting him? If so, she liked him and doesn't like you enough. She uses the excuse of "needing time to get comfortable" before finding a way to kick you out of her friendzone, especially if you cut her off with financial or physical help.
Hi Courtney. I just wanted to say that one of the things that I love about your videos is that you're able to show that instead of some pick-up artist hack or hyper-masculine facade, 9 times out of 10 all it takes to understand what's attractive to good women comes from good old fashioned common sense. The chronically-online folk (have to put myself in that category unfortunately) often get to the point that they forget what common sense is, so it's very important to have someone like you giving us that reminder. Objective for this week: roll in some grass🙂
What you said at the 2:20-2:40 mark is so true and I think a lot of guys don’t understand that. Just tell the girl when & where, don’t bargain, if a girl is interested she’ll gladly tell you a time that is better than the one offered.
Yeah it was a shock when I realized that when I set the plans, women are very willing to make things work in their schedule to stick with my plans. I always wanted to be super flexible and empathetic to their schedule but I found women prefer having concrete plans made so they don’t have to make the final call.
Hey relationships and pursuing romantic interests is super complex and nuanced, I hope that you gain enough insights to improve yourself and figure out what's blocking you! Best of luck @@doom9603
You talked about the "chronically online" stuff in the most sensible, diplomatic way. I really appreciate it. I just took a long walk after watching this video :)
I haven't watched your videos for a couple of weeks and was pleasantly surprised to see(and hear) you using a new opening line. Thanks for another great video. Staying in love is often more difficult than falling in love, and that begins with attraction.
Taking the lead is not as black and white as some may think. There are nuances to it. Your behavior sets the tone/example and leads the way if you are persistent with it and disciplined. But to imply that leading means having to always take the first step in every situation equates to trying to preemptively act upon what the girl is thinking about or possibly desiring at that specific moment. Also, having to always make the plans, set the time, choose a place for dates, gets really tiring after a while. It's alright for the girl to make the suggestion every so often because it looks like she is contributing as well, otherwise it's just one-sided and it feels as if you're dating a child or an uninspired bot. If the girl has something on her mind, she should also communicate it instead of trying to hint at it so subtly as to make it impossible to pick up on it and then you are told you didn't take initiative when you should have. Been there, done that. It's frustrating as well.
I don’t care if she’s attracted to me or not. I do the things I do because I like to do them. I don’t do the things I do to attract a woman, if she’s turned off by me and my actions, then “bye. Now I’m glad you know how I feel about a majority of the things you do. “
My mother is a feminist who was raised by Communists, who believed (because they were legally required to) that men and women are explicitly equal in all respects; my father is an odd mix of take-charge Army officer and mama's boy, who expects men and women to be equal not only in principle but also in action; and I'm autistic and struggle to correctly interpret subtext and body language. Let me tell you, #1 "Expecting her to lead" is an incredibly hard habit to break under those conditions. I'm supposed to just do what I think is right and wait to see if she nonverbally signals that she appreciates it? Maybe you'd like me to walk across a minefield with bricks tied to my feet, too. I'm trying, but damn it's hard.
The validation one is well-said, because it's critically important that both parties in a relationship are validated. That said, it's the "making it your entire personality" bit that makes it problematic. Balance in all things.
Keeping a healthy mind and body keeps me good all the time. Less is more and having no expectations is peace. Don't ask from others what you can't do for yourself is my motto.
I’d like a gf but every time I didn’t have one I did much better in my life. The problem is I keep getting girls who try to “fix” me and they end up ruining my finances and vehicle and I lose another place to live. I’m really hesitant on pursuing anymore after the last one.
@@KBowWow75 asian women are much more likely to be materialistic and transactional: It is a contract and if you default, they walk. Western women are more romantic and feel an obligation to support a man "in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer,", etc.
Good morning, Courtney! I'm freshly out of a toxic relationship, and I was clueless about how to better myself as a person and a man. Unfortunately, these things weren't taught in my family and watching you over these past few months has given me so much. I feel like I finally have a road map and attainable goals to achieve that bring me closer to a healthy happy relationship and life overall. I can't thank you enough for your insight, wisdom, and advice. You've been amazing for me, and I imagine a lot of other men. Please keep the gems coming. Wishing you and yours the absolute best, take care.
If you do have to ask her what she brings to the table instead of using your observation skills over time, and she says I am the table, you may remind her that men built that table and it's her job to make it beautiful and pleasant and sanitary if she actually cares about you. Like Courtney says you shouldn't be asking a question like that but you also should know that when a girl says she is the table she is telling you she is absolutely useless and she doesn't have heart for other people because if she is the table she is getting used and she might not notice how language speaks volumes but you don't want a used dirty sloppy table
Everything that exists in society wouldn't be if not for the unpaid labor of women so stuff it. Any woman with more than 2 brain cells can smell the attitude from a mile away.
How about you let the woman pursue you? Then when you see she's worth your time or potential in her, then that's the time you take the lead. Sometimes you do all the work that the woman don't do anything anymore, you just tire yourself by then.😔🇵🇭
@@xjoemallardx I know, and that's what I mean, as an attractive guy, I just let the women who like me pursue me to see if they're really serious, cause a lot of this ladies are just in for games, and not worth my time anymore.
"I had a woman who constantly contacted me first, and even asked why I didn't contact her first. When she reached out to me, I wanted to plan dates, but she only gave me excuses. I deleted her number, but she messaged me again two weeks later. I didn't answer. These types of women are exhausting and just want attention.
Life need not be so difficult. If she likes you, she's going to give you validation. That validation is going to make you feel chemistry. That chemistry is going to make the man want to put in effort.
Great Video Courtney. I like what you mentioned in the video about nuance... and having chronically online behaviors (too much combative speech). I think many of us do this by accident as I have seen it myself just observing people.
Im passive because i dont want to upset people. I dont like aggressive people. Im not a door mat, i just have been told so many times that nobody wants to hear what i have to say.
I buy things with my own money and don't need her permission like other men need to ask her. I know someone at work wants to buy a laptop with his own money but he thinks he needs her permission. I said to him just buy it. Does she ask you permission when she buys a purse or dress? The answer is she doesn't.
@@doom9603 my father isnt able to choose his own socks without getting approval....its insane, yet thats what i grew up with...he was a school principal and now he is stewing in alcohol and TV-propaganda for a retirement. and he projects all bad things on me! ;)
Duh, that's because this simp has it in his head that his money is the couple's money and her money is her money. She will keep him around only as long as she gets "paid" metaphorically. Most likely, she is in debt up to her eyeballs, and he has no idea.
Eh I really hate the idea that men should adhere to social gender roles without fail, but woman get choice and can do whatever they want. If a woman is masculine it's now celebrated. For men we've been given one extra emotion crying, but all the others are still considered not manly. We can be happy, sad, angry that's about it. The other stuff is hidden in fear of killing attraction, looking weak, inability to process emotions etc. It's one reason a lot of men are giving up, we don't have a role anymore and when you try to fall into one you either have toxic masculinity, or insecurity. Imagine trying to fall in between that all day everyday as a man... it's exhausting trying to turn on/off emotions all the time.
That's why videos like this exist. Women get presented with all kind of outs. Except one.. and it's pissing a lot of them off right now because it takes their power away. We create this out for us. I myself what I do is ignore them all until one may present themself, remember vast majority of them assume you can read their mind so those are out but there's always a handful of them left. I basically put them through a human decency check, nothing cruel or anything like stupid mind games and shit like they do but just do good small things for them and see what the reaction is. If someone is always appreciative and humble, approach that one.
I've always been that kind to take the lead and make those choices, like you are indicating, but when you say put in the effort, especially when it comes to building a relationship, women naturally will do the bare minimum if at all. Men are incumbent to do everything and if a woman is really really all about you, she will try to do things to make your life easier but don't expect her to put in personal effort on herself because women don't think, they typically just feel and if they don't feel like it's necessary they won't even think it's a thing. Just so the fellas know in case they haven't really dealt with women because I've been dealing with women in a positive way since I was a preteen and soon I will be in my mid-thirties
so, are you married or did you give up on maintaining something meaningful with modern women? because people like you dont get treated the way they should. things will change, but not until it gets much worse even than its now. i like your perspective, but you left out the part where this touches your personal life. and therefore, its a little sus.
Exactly. The problem with her advice is that it's largely for upper betas. Unless he gets into some marriage game later on, he'll be a "leader" in a household doing everything his wife wants while he has to pretend it was his own idea: "You know, I was thinking it would be fun to spend our whole Saturday shoe shopping! You too? Great!" Nothing wrong with that, if that's what guys here want and she means well and she gives wonderful insights and criticisms but overall, she wants what's in her and other women's interests, not in ours.
Great video! Would love to hear your thoughts on how a man can understand what he wants vs needs in a woman. I was divorced last year after almost 20 years with the same woman (mid-30s now), and my first instinct is to seek out women who are the opposite of my ex in every way. Probably not the correct approach. Thanks!
This whole channel highlights the cognitive dissonance we see between gender norm expectations and the reality of modern life. Wanting men take the lead is fine, but this concept has been so pejoritivly generalized that it's created false expectations. Especially in an era where the populist feminism movement is pushing for equality (rightfully so), but not seeking to shift expectations and responsibilities that accompany it. Equal treatment by definition carries the expectations of equal sharing of responsibilities, especially in a day and age where men have increasingly more risk associated with traditionally normal counting roles. Why should women expect men to initiate dating, and be the only ones to face rejection? If a woman is interested in a man, why should we not expect her to ask him out, or plan the first date? If your answer is "that's not what women want", while guess what; then they don't actually want equality.
Because smart instinctively understand the sexual dynamics. Initiating means they are more interested than the man, who is therefore more likely to take advantage of that to " pump and dump" them.
Not to mention that being forced to face rejection and be absolutely humiliated is "not what men want," so why not compromise? It should be normal for either party to engage first.
Dont worry guys, hopefully the next video/content will be better 💯 I know courtney can give advice beyond/summed up as "just be hot" (which admittedly this video was 🤦🏾♂️)
They want you to lead in everything except what's for dinner. Man: "Where would you like to eat tonight?" Woman: "I don't know, whatever you want, I guess." Man: "Ok, let's go here." Woman: "No, not that one." Man: "Ok, then Restaurant B it is." Woman: "No not that one either, we just had that last week." Man: "Well, what, then?" Woman: "I don't care." Man: 😵💫
@@LisaFenton-h7f it is beyond ridiculous with how many men that binge watch this type of content only to comment that “we no longer care about dating or women!” .. it’s such a lack of self awareness and I try to point it out to them every chance I get lol
0:28 In this day and age, it is considered increasingly dangerous for men to take lead especially with 'initiation' or shall i rather say approach. With influx of tiktok shaming, men-shaming all just because of wanting to know her sincerely and 'taking the lead'. I hope women really understood this, or else no thanks it sjus not worth it. It kills any form of interest we have toward women
I clearly remember during my courtship days with my wife, it was always me planning out the venue as well as time for the dates .... Clear psychology behind this is that any girl who tends like her man, ideally would love to know about him as a husband material ... So when a man ideally plans out these things and communicates the same to his girlfriend, she is then more then happy to block that time from any other meeting or work just so that she can spend the time in knowing how good of a husband material her man is .... Seeking validation ... Not at all happening especially during dating since it exposes that the man is terribly short of confidence and also unsure of the way he carries himself ... Anyways I hope this video is helpful to all the young dating men out there ... ☺️.
Good statement. Especially about planning dates. Get your chance to plan now. When you get married, she will plan your life away. One weekend at a time. Women can fill your life up with more shit and projects than one man could do or afford in a lifetime.
You are so beautiful! Thank you for another wonderful video. I am especially interested on the topic of what attracts women. I like the way you explain everything you say. You’re always easy to understand and feel uplifted after every video you release. Thank you!
This one frustrates the piss out of me. I think texting good morning and good night is polite. It's a great way to start and end a day for someone, and it lets them know you are thinking about them. I know the game to play is ignoring them and pretending you are not interested, but I hate the game and I think it's cruel, so I refuse to play that game. I don't really push people. Just ask them questions or their thoughts on something. But today apparently saying good morning every day and good night is considered clingy. Like where the hell has society gone to?
@@KBowWow75I know what you mean but to the modern women you can't text them as much. I woukd say no more than 3 a day while you getting to know her. Everything gotta be meet up in person. Hop this help
What I've found is I ask plainly for a text back requesting an item, a time or date to meet up, or something for her to come back with a clear answer showing her interest and her making herself available. If she doesn't text back, I don't follow up, it's done move on.
Every failed relationship I've ever had, began to deteriorate the second I showed emotion or vulnerability. Women do not respect a man that shows his emotions on a consistent basis. They see it as weakness. And at that point, it's over. This is from 30 years of dating.
Hi Courtney, the chronically online part, what if you just like to listen to music all the time, listen to scripture or bible app, or watching Netflix and Anime. Is that being chronically online?
I need help. If things go well at meeting each other the first. So there is some interest between us but after a while of talking to each other what do I do when I feel like I can't think of what else to talk about? I feel like I struck blank
Good morning, Courtney! If I were to suggest a time and place for a date and the woman says that day doesn’t work for her, do you think I should suggest another time or ask what day works for her?
If I meet a girl on an app, she's not getting some elaborate creative & expensive date. I think all these ladies are still expecting to be chivalrously pursued by a man like their grandmothers were, but that world is long gone, dating apps finally killed it when they gave women a sea of suitors to chose from. If you simply breathe wrong on that date, all the hard work in putting it together is for nothing because they'll just replace you with someone else.
“Women” who find men “clingy” often times are immature attention garden tools. If said “woman” wants the man, then she won’t find him to be clingy but thoughtful and caring and all the sappy stuff….. ❤️ u Courtney
I will take this advice to the bank. Also I haven't had internet for a couple of months so basically I was living under a rock and didn't know squat. Which not having internet was kind of like a blessing in disguise, I noticed I was happier and less irritable now I don't spend too much time online any more. Exposure therapy has helped, focusing on reality helps. Rolling around in grass... Helps.
Many of her tips don't actually work. Men who have actual experience with women know this. The only ones that follow her advice are those gullible, naive ones who aren't good at analyzing trends in people's behaviors.
This video can be good tips ASSUMING a man meets a certain woman who is worth trying to win her attraction over. I think the author is speaking in that context. Not all situations are beneficial for a man to worry about winning her attraction because she might penalize him by giving him a hard time about not calling enough or not making enough effort to spend time with her.
I agree with you. Now, let's reverse it. What's the fastest way for a woman to lose all the attraction of a smart man who is also fine by his own. 1) Behaving masculine; 2) Having a dating schedule (dating multiple men at the same time); 3) Entitlement, argumentive, being bossy...; 4) Talking like trash and acting like it; 5) Being disrespectful to people in general. waiter...; 6) Being on stupid fans. Yep, Courtney smart men will test women from the get-go by setting boundaries according to their values and morals. Before any commitment, of course. That's not a bad boy, but it's definitely not a simp either. If women cross any important boundary, he will no longer be interested cause he understands what will work in a long-term relationship and what will not. Looks are less important for such a man. Just a bonus. You know why, cause he understands that physical looks déminage by ageing.
I really enjoy following you Courtney 👌I already do it myself how you describe it, but it's nice to hear from a woman how women see it (perhaps confirming that I still have it in me 😌) And your eyes match your sweater very well because of the beautiful color 🤩Greetings from the Netherlands 🧡🧡
5. Showing any form of physical, mental or emotional weakness, in any way, ever. Women don't care that you're only human, they just want a strong protector, they don't want to deal with your weakness or fallibility. Never risk being truly vulnerable or honest with any womam you want to or have a romantic relationship with, she will judge you negatively because of it, it's never worth the risk. Turn to your friends, family, professionals or even strangers first to help and support you with those things. You may get away with showing weakness occasionally if you're doing well enough at meeting her other needs, she may not criticise you openly, but she will be judging you negatively any time you do it. Women will say that's not true, but they know it is, they just don't want to admit it because it makes them appear heartless and uncaring, and women still get a lot of mileage out of being the caring and supportive gender. Women do want a man to be emotionally intelligent and mature, but because it implies you'll be able to deal with their emotionality, their weaknesses, whilst not dumping yours on them, because you'll be strong enough to deal with it yourself. They do want to feel that a man can go to them for support and understanding during times of difficulty, but they don't want you to actually do it, it's more about their self image than your needs. And before anyone replies with "Who hurt you?", lots of people, but I've learned to deal with it myself.
Its always good to have a plan, but there is a thin line between "taking the lead", and "dictating terms". As a man, its important to show a woman that you can implement effective leadership skills, but you should probably also ask for their opinions in matters so that they feel included and considered in decisions.
You're damned if you do, and damned if you don't. In that case, you've got nothing to lose by following whats in your heart, because either way its game over for you.
When you take the first step to improve yourself in a mental way, you take the first step away from chronically online behavior. By the way, I surprised the girl I'm seeing the other night when she was performing in front of a small crowd. Her face lit up when she saw me!
So glad you mentioned the chronically online bit. I was sucked into the redpill content for years. Took a break and Went back to it the other day. it looked and sounded like the WWE except they actually believed they were the undertaker.
I Remember my Ex never being able to make any decisions whatsoever ( what movies, what restaurants), and i mean nothing so she always left it up to me which was fine. When we broke up one of her accusations was i never let her decide on anything 😵💫. Give the girl what she says she wants, then in the end you find out thats not what she wants. Take any advice on women with a handful of salt .
I had a gf years ago tell me that she wished I was more decisive when it came things like what to have for dinner. The funny thing is our conversations would normally go like this: Her: hmm I'm getting hungry. What should we do for dinner? Me: I'm feeling like Thai tonight. Let's go down to our favorite Thai place. Her: no I don't want that. Me: Ok that's fine. I could totally do pizza. Haven't had pizza in a long time. Her: I don't want pizza. Me: That's cool. Let's just go get takeout from your favorite Indian place. Her: I'm not feeling that Me: Ok so what do you want? Her: I don't know. I just want you to decide. Me. I just decided 3 times.
Every woman I ever met was like that. They don't make any decisions, they don't do any planning, they don't take any responsibility. It's because they don't really know what they want, they just somehow "feel" what they don't want. As a man in a relationship you're not a partner but a parent.
Men will stop asking modern women what they bring to the table when women stop asking it with their no icks mandates and 6 or higher requirements. If women want men to lead, then they need to appreciate the effort, not criticize and compare it constantly with strangers they saw online.
Problem. Some people's lives versus your own simply don't make sense for you to be making the decisions. My Ex has 2 kids, they are not my kids, I was given little insight into the requirements surrounding them except a general schedule of being with her or not. Why would I presume automatically that anything I'd come up with without input would work given all that heehaw? On top of that, even If I know for sure she didn't have have them, who's to say she wants to do anything? I don't believe in onesided decision making without all of the information. In hindsight, I was apparently expected to be doing just this, and especially in that case with her life it was never going to be something I'd be doing. I want an equal partnership, not someone that needs bossed around
I hate going out, don't particularly like dates, why would I plan something (without input) that she might hate? Way better to have her plan/make suggestions because I'm gonna prolly mostly hate it regardless. I'm only doing it to spend time with the person in question, not because I enjoy in ANY way the rest of it.
women wan t a leader and then they dont follow the lead, calling you insecure and controlling. please, courtney, hold women accountable. same as men. anything else makes it worse. i think you got the bag...now use your platform to help instead of milking it, please!° be the rolemodel my daughters need!!!!!!!!!!!!! i know this will get deleted, but please make her read it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Calling the kettle black it so many women out here who lack confidence in thereself who dont no how or wont communicate who have soo many trust issue because of fealing with the wrong type of man in their past and dont heal! Its crazy men take all the blame for the relationship not being healthy
Courtney, I sense a Tide endorsement coming since people need to roll around on the grass! Those stains. Solid Advice, Excellent video! Taking initiative and being decisive in a positive way is key.
Idk why, but i burst out laughing when you said that number 3 was Chronically Online Behavior (don't get me wrong, that type of trait is unattractive, but it being relatable is the funny part).
I think it’s best to have real life relationships, like hanging out with social groups at places. I’m going to go to this speed dating event in a few days. At least I get to meet real women and that eliminates the scammer suspicions.
tbh everything is interconnected, so online and rl are basically the same. I can tell both worlds are kinda cringe 😆 Personally I challenge a chance if I see one but I can just recommend not putting much effort in it. If it works, it works. If not then not.
Take notes. See if the event has men move from table to table or women move. Studies show women are more amenable if they move and the men stay. Also, note the men to women ratio. Speed dating has become like other small group singles activities where there are many more women versus men at these events. If you can do so discretely, find out what percentage of the women are single mothers. Supposedly, the largest fraction of women at speed dating events are divorcees with children. Finally, don't be surprised if speed dating is like online dating. Women there look for the top tier men just like online. The difference is you may be in the top percent who actually show up as opposed to the billions of men worldwide who could be on a dating app. Good luck!
@@pace1195 thanks for the advice. I will keep that in mind. I’ll just see what happens. I want to interact face to face with a woman so maybe that can help get a date also.
4:52 As a man.. I cringe when I see my male friends and content creators post things online every single day. Especially 'masculinity content" or when men say we need to save the world.. what, from behind your computer or smart phone? The irony is, masculine men don't spend their days mindlessly scrolling on social media or being over opinionated I think to myself "do you have a life outside of social media? Go build or fix something!"
At the end of the day, if she likes you, it will be natural. If she's not into you, it will feel like work.
💯
I learned the latter pretty quickly. Just the lack of reciprocation and effort on their end feels draining. Not saying that because you’re attracted to someone, you’re entitled to a relationship. If it’s not going anywhere, it’s just better to cut your loses for your own sake and sanity.
Roll around in the grass……❤❤❤❤
pretty much
When a man showers more attention than the woman wants - Clingy behavior
When a man gives less attention than the woman wants - emotionally unavailable.
You can't win with woman 🤦♂️
1) 0:28 Expecting her to lead
2) 2:52 Neglecting yourself
3:47 Sponsor Ad
3) 4:52 Chronically Online Behavior
4) 7:28 Overly Clingy or Seeking Validation
I guess sponsor ad will destroy a woman's attraction.
Heh... fuck.
I was looking for this, thank you! I like being able to read to summarize since I find it hard to focus on audio only
@@jackdonith Every time I say, "this sexual experience is brought to you by SkillShare," the woman kicks me out of her house.
Wow I’ve done this I think all of them no wonder 😭
That "chronically online" bit is pretty serious. I hate being nostalgic, but the days before the internet and social media were way easier on our minds. Now, we're overthinking and over-analyzing everything, because of some crap we heard online.
More like crap we *experienced* online, since there are so many dating sites and apps.
You can also add to that advent of texting and even mass use of mobile phones in general. Now it's like, if you don't get a response/call back in a couple of hours, it can start making you wonder.
Way too many people these days analyze this stuff to an absurd degree.. they put 5 times the effort into analyzing this stuff thsn they do actually going out and meeting people
Totally agree with you. I was better off before, there are som good pointers but overall it just make you stuck in your head.
Women's phones are taped to their heads, if they don't reply it's deliberate
Pay close attention to neglecting yourself. It doesn't only mess up the relationship, but when it ends due to that, you're going to be in a position where you have to get back into shape. I took it for granted when I got what I wanted and ended up worse than where I started.
But yeah that’s good advice
I saw a young adult couple out at a nice high end restaurant the other day. Both sat looking at their phones at the table. My wife is age 59 and I am 60 and we have been together 40 years but we still can talk for hours without looking at our phones if we are out together.
My wife can’t communicate at all
Imagine being able to look at your phone all day and neglect your partner and still get laid. Golden times🎉
What you're missing from that picture is that the young couple were probably looking for funny things to show each other and interesting topics to discuss, and you just happened to notice them when their behavior didn't conform to your ingrained expectations.
@@deusexaethera For an hour? I know what you mean but that wasn't what they were doing?
@@Robinson8491We both look at our phones all day. If we don't, we get into heated verbal arguments. Never mind the getting laid part!
As I watch this video online I can't help but feel a deep sense of irony when watching the "Chronically Online" segment.
😂
lol, ditto! Oh the irony...
@@AndrewAung1992 Some Red Pill channels offer valuable warnings and advice, but a person should take care not to become too negative in advance and should give a new woman the benefit of the doubt. You should be discreet in what you say to any new person, not immediately look to start aguments and so on. But 'stay away from those channels?' Ah, no. Given how risky dating is these days, awareness matters. You have to be careful.
@@AndrewAung1992 I've been happily married for five years, and lived with my wife for four years before that, so it's not about me. If you think there's 'nothing wrong with modern women,' you don't seem to have any idea of the sort of culture we live in now. I hope for your sake you don't learn some unfortunate relationship lessons in the future.
@@AndrewAung1992facts
I really like that. Chronically online behavior. You can always see that kind of behavior in people, both men and women. I tend to steer clear of these types of people for good reason. Sound advice regarding the topic to unplug from the online matrix!
2 things that I've had women say they appreciate about me is always having a positive attitude. I've also been told I'm very disciplined and dependable.
I've heard that many times...usually followed with a "chemistry isn't there "
@@Cee_Eff dependable is another word for predictable
funny thing is: women know they actually need that. but as long as theres a welfare state to live off...no man needed. until other peoples money is gone for good. like in eastern europe in the nineties.
@@jasonmarchant4525it’s another word for ‘emotional tampon’.
Dependable is code for "good husband material"
Which means they'll want you once they've run out of other options.
Love your opinion on validation. A mantra that I hold near and dear to my heart about that is. “ love is not something you look for love is something you become. “
Courtney, I’ve recently gotten back into running and getting in shape and listening to your videos for some reason is much more helpful to me than listening to music. I feel like I gain confidence just listening to your videos and I stand a little taller and feel more confidence in me because I envision the person I want to develop into. Thanks for your videos and it’s great that you respect men and don’t trash talk. I have subscribed.
Now time to get back to this run. (:
Another thing that can destroy attraction, rushing things! I’ve learned over time that women need time to get comfortable with a guy and know that he’s trustworthy.
Has a women you ever dated or were interested in banged Chad an hour after meeting him? If so, she liked him and doesn't like you enough. She uses the excuse of "needing time to get comfortable" before finding a way to kick you out of her friendzone, especially if you cut her off with financial or physical help.
Duh!
if he's Chad, she will rush
So do men !
Hi Courtney. I just wanted to say that one of the things that I love about your videos is that you're able to show that instead of some pick-up artist hack or hyper-masculine facade, 9 times out of 10 all it takes to understand what's attractive to good women comes from good old fashioned common sense. The chronically-online folk (have to put myself in that category unfortunately) often get to the point that they forget what common sense is, so it's very important to have someone like you giving us that reminder.
Objective for this week: roll in some grass🙂
What you said at the 2:20-2:40 mark is so true and I think a lot of guys don’t understand that.
Just tell the girl when & where, don’t bargain, if a girl is interested she’ll gladly tell you a time that is better than the one offered.
men always lead, even if they don't lead. Think about it.
Yeah it was a shock when I realized that when I set the plans, women are very willing to make things work in their schedule to stick with my plans. I always wanted to be super flexible and empathetic to their schedule but I found women prefer having concrete plans made so they don’t have to make the final call.
@@ErikPelyukhno funny enough, for me it didn't matter whether I made the plans or not 😆 Probably some personality stuff
@@ErikPelyukhno 100%!
Hey relationships and pursuing romantic interests is super complex and nuanced, I hope that you gain enough insights to improve yourself and figure out what's blocking you! Best of luck @@doom9603
You talked about the "chronically online" stuff in the most sensible, diplomatic way. I really appreciate it. I just took a long walk after watching this video :)
I haven't watched your videos for a couple of weeks and was pleasantly surprised to see(and hear) you using a new opening line. Thanks for another great video. Staying in love is often more difficult than falling in love, and that begins with attraction.
👏🏼 thanks for being here!
@@CourtneyRyan Anytime.
Taking the lead is not as black and white as some may think. There are nuances to it. Your behavior sets the tone/example and leads the way if you are persistent with it and disciplined. But to imply that leading means having to always take the first step in every situation equates to trying to preemptively act upon what the girl is thinking about or possibly desiring at that specific moment. Also, having to always make the plans, set the time, choose a place for dates, gets really tiring after a while. It's alright for the girl to make the suggestion every so often because it looks like she is contributing as well, otherwise it's just one-sided and it feels as if you're dating a child or an uninspired bot. If the girl has something on her mind, she should also communicate it instead of trying to hint at it so subtly as to make it impossible to pick up on it and then you are told you didn't take initiative when you should have. Been there, done that. It's frustrating as well.
THANK YOU, to be fair if im picking most things out than i just think the other person is too dumb to do anything , which is a huge turn off for me.
I don’t care if she’s attracted to me or not. I do the things I do because I like to do them. I don’t do the things I do to attract a woman, if she’s turned off by me and my actions, then “bye. Now I’m glad you know how I feel about a majority of the things you do. “
I love the green 💚 shirt on you, Courtney! Wishing you a wonderful relaxing weekend
You too my friend! ❤️❤️
@@CourtneyRyan Thank you! ❤ ❤
I don't know. I'm getting creepy Katie Britt vibes with that sweater. At least she's not in the kitchen. 😂😅
My mother is a feminist who was raised by Communists, who believed (because they were legally required to) that men and women are explicitly equal in all respects; my father is an odd mix of take-charge Army officer and mama's boy, who expects men and women to be equal not only in principle but also in action; and I'm autistic and struggle to correctly interpret subtext and body language. Let me tell you, #1 "Expecting her to lead" is an incredibly hard habit to break under those conditions. I'm supposed to just do what I think is right and wait to see if she nonverbally signals that she appreciates it? Maybe you'd like me to walk across a minefield with bricks tied to my feet, too. I'm trying, but damn it's hard.
Same here. My Party-man Soviet upbringing made me expect all people to be men, wich ruined my marriage
Your video reflects a comprehensive. Research and effort for every word you speak.
Awesome presentation with majical voice.
The validation one is well-said, because it's critically important that both parties in a relationship are validated. That said, it's the "making it your entire personality" bit that makes it problematic. Balance in all things.
Keeping a healthy mind and body keeps me good all the time. Less is more and having no expectations is peace.
Don't ask from others what you can't do for yourself is my motto.
'Stage 5 clinger' is mentioned in most of your videos. Could you please elaborate on this? What are the implied 4 previous stages?
I’d like a gf but every time I didn’t have one I did much better in my life. The problem is I keep getting girls who try to “fix” me and they end up ruining my finances and vehicle and I lose another place to live.
I’m really hesitant on pursuing anymore after the last one.
@@LinkinVerbz44 Nah. I’m just looking in Asia now
what, they crash your car and take your finances to buy their frivolous shit?
@@75egcg I am in East Asia. Not much better here mate.
@@KBowWow75 okay nvm. I’ll look in Antarctica.
@@KBowWow75 asian women are much more likely to be materialistic and transactional: It is a contract and if you default, they walk.
Western women are more romantic and feel an obligation to support a man "in sickness and in health, for richer or poorer,", etc.
Good morning, Courtney! I'm freshly out of a toxic relationship, and I was clueless about how to better myself as a person and a man. Unfortunately, these things weren't taught in my family and watching you over these past few months has given me so much. I feel like I finally have a road map and attainable goals to achieve that bring me closer to a healthy happy relationship and life overall. I can't thank you enough for your insight, wisdom, and advice. You've been amazing for me, and I imagine a lot of other men. Please keep the gems coming. Wishing you and yours the absolute best, take care.
🥹🤍 I’m so glad I could help. This means the world to me - wishing you the very best!
@@CourtneyRyan 🤍
Ms Ryan your demeanor and soft voice are a great part of your video’s as well as content🍷‼️
If you do have to ask her what she brings to the table instead of using your observation skills over time, and she says I am the table, you may remind her that men built that table and it's her job to make it beautiful and pleasant and sanitary if she actually cares about you. Like Courtney says you shouldn't be asking a question like that but you also should know that when a girl says she is the table she is telling you she is absolutely useless and she doesn't have heart for other people because if she is the table she is getting used and she might not notice how language speaks volumes but you don't want a used dirty sloppy table
Everything that exists in society wouldn't be if not for the unpaid labor of women so stuff it. Any woman with more than 2 brain cells can smell the attitude from a mile away.
I get your point but it's to long just summarize it next time
How about you let the woman pursue you? Then when you see she's worth your time or potential in her, then that's the time you take the lead. Sometimes you do all the work that the woman don't do anything anymore, you just tire yourself by then.😔🇵🇭
They'll only pursue you if you're attractive.
@@xjoemallardx I know, and that's what I mean, as an attractive guy, I just let the women who like me pursue me to see if they're really serious, cause a lot of this ladies are just in for games, and not worth my time anymore.
"I had a woman who constantly contacted me first, and even asked why I didn't contact her first. When she reached out to me, I wanted to plan dates, but she only gave me excuses. I deleted her number, but she messaged me again two weeks later. I didn't answer. These types of women are exhausting and just want attention.
🇵🇭
Women do not pursue.
Most women would expect a man to have the motivation to lead.
Life need not be so difficult. If she likes you, she's going to give you validation. That validation is going to make you feel chemistry. That chemistry is going to make the man want to put in effort.
Great Video Courtney. I like what you mentioned in the video about nuance... and having chronically online behaviors (too much combative speech). I think many of us do this by accident as I have seen it myself just observing people.
I posted this on my Facebook page. Thanks. Will listen a few times.
Im passive because i dont want to upset people. I dont like aggressive people. Im not a door mat, i just have been told so many times that nobody wants to hear what i have to say.
Another valid piece of information that is useful. Thanks Courtney.
I buy things with my own money and don't need her permission like other men need to ask her. I know someone at work wants to buy a laptop with his own money but he thinks he needs her permission. I said to him just buy it. Does she ask you permission when she buys a purse or dress? The answer is she doesn't.
its insane where the baseline is set today. unstustainable would be the understatement of the century. all courtesy of printing money.
Who asks their lady whether they can buy anything (for themselves)? wtf?
@@doom9603 my father isnt able to choose his own socks without getting approval....its insane, yet thats what i grew up with...he was a school principal and now he is stewing in alcohol and TV-propaganda for a retirement. and he projects all bad things on me! ;)
Duh, that's because this simp has it in his head that his money is the couple's money and her money is her money. She will keep him around only as long as she gets "paid" metaphorically. Most likely, she is in debt up to her eyeballs, and he has no idea.
@@pace1195sounds ew.
Eh I really hate the idea that men should adhere to social gender roles without fail, but woman get choice and can do whatever they want. If a woman is masculine it's now celebrated. For men we've been given one extra emotion crying, but all the others are still considered not manly. We can be happy, sad, angry that's about it. The other stuff is hidden in fear of killing attraction, looking weak, inability to process emotions etc. It's one reason a lot of men are giving up, we don't have a role anymore and when you try to fall into one you either have toxic masculinity, or insecurity. Imagine trying to fall in between that all day everyday as a man... it's exhausting trying to turn on/off emotions all the time.
That's why videos like this exist. Women get presented with all kind of outs. Except one.. and it's pissing a lot of them off right now because it takes their power away. We create this out for us. I myself what I do is ignore them all until one may present themself, remember vast majority of them assume you can read their mind so those are out but there's always a handful of them left. I basically put them through a human decency check, nothing cruel or anything like stupid mind games and shit like they do but just do good small things for them and see what the reaction is. If someone is always appreciative and humble, approach that one.
I just want to say thank you, you are rational sensible and it is so refreshing overall that the world isn't so crazy.
I've always been that kind to take the lead and make those choices, like you are indicating, but when you say put in the effort, especially when it comes to building a relationship, women naturally will do the bare minimum if at all. Men are incumbent to do everything and if a woman is really really all about you, she will try to do things to make your life easier but don't expect her to put in personal effort on herself because women don't think, they typically just feel and if they don't feel like it's necessary they won't even think it's a thing. Just so the fellas know in case they haven't really dealt with women because I've been dealing with women in a positive way since I was a preteen and soon I will be in my mid-thirties
so, are you married or did you give up on maintaining something meaningful with modern women? because people like you dont get treated the way they should. things will change, but not until it gets much worse even than its now.
i like your perspective, but you left out the part where this touches your personal life. and therefore, its a little sus.
Exactly, don't waste your time and resources. If someone is worthy, they will prove it.
Exactly. The problem with her advice is that it's largely for upper betas. Unless he gets into some marriage game later on, he'll be a "leader" in a household doing everything his wife wants while he has to pretend it was his own idea: "You know, I was thinking it would be fun to spend our whole Saturday shoe shopping! You too? Great!" Nothing wrong with that, if that's what guys here want and she means well and she gives wonderful insights and criticisms but overall, she wants what's in her and other women's interests, not in ours.
speaking of chronically online behavior, have you seen modern women and their phones who post to their timelines every couple hours?
Great video! Would love to hear your thoughts on how a man can understand what he wants vs needs in a woman. I was divorced last year after almost 20 years with the same woman (mid-30s now), and my first instinct is to seek out women who are the opposite of my ex in every way. Probably not the correct approach. Thanks!
This whole channel highlights the cognitive dissonance we see between gender norm expectations and the reality of modern life.
Wanting men take the lead is fine, but this concept has been so pejoritivly generalized that it's created false expectations.
Especially in an era where the populist feminism movement is pushing for equality (rightfully so), but not seeking to shift expectations and responsibilities that accompany it.
Equal treatment by definition carries the expectations of equal sharing of responsibilities, especially in a day and age where men have increasingly more risk associated with traditionally normal counting roles.
Why should women expect men to initiate dating, and be the only ones to face rejection?
If a woman is interested in a man, why should we not expect her to ask him out, or plan the first date?
If your answer is "that's not what women want", while guess what; then they don't actually want equality.
you nailed it 🎉
Because smart instinctively understand the sexual dynamics. Initiating means they are more interested than the man, who is therefore more likely to take advantage of that to " pump and dump" them.
Not to mention that being forced to face rejection and be absolutely humiliated is "not what men want," so why not compromise? It should be normal for either party to engage first.
Awesome video. I just subscribed. Keep up the excellent work.
Dont worry guys, hopefully the next video/content will be better 💯 I know courtney can give advice beyond/summed up as "just be hot" (which admittedly this video was 🤦🏾♂️)
I can’t even get the date taking care of yourself only gets you so far and some people just aren’t gonna get what they want
1. breathing
2. existing
3. being an average man
4. satisfied with being an average man
💯
Always knocking it out of the park!!! Thanks!
They want you to lead in everything except what's for dinner.
Man: "Where would you like to eat tonight?"
Woman: "I don't know, whatever you want, I guess."
Man: "Ok, let's go here."
Woman: "No, not that one."
Man: "Ok, then Restaurant B it is."
Woman: "No not that one either, we just had that last week."
Man: "Well, what, then?"
Woman: "I don't care."
Man: 😵💫
I think the bigger problem is even getting us interested. Feminism is making women single forever
Kobiety zamieniły facetów na koty, psy, wino i wibrator...
WHY are you even on this site if all you have to say is "Don't date women" Move along...
@@LisaFenton-h7f it is beyond ridiculous with how many men that binge watch this type of content only to comment that “we no longer care about dating or women!” .. it’s such a lack of self awareness and I try to point it out to them every chance I get lol
Good morning Courtney, digging the green 🍀😌
Thank you so much! ❤️❤️
0:28 In this day and age, it is considered increasingly dangerous for men to take lead especially with 'initiation' or shall i rather say approach. With influx of tiktok shaming, men-shaming all just because of wanting to know her sincerely and 'taking the lead'. I hope women really understood this, or else no thanks it sjus not worth it. It kills any form of interest we have toward women
I clearly remember during my courtship days with my wife, it was always me planning out the venue as well as time for the dates .... Clear psychology behind this is that any girl who tends like her man, ideally would love to know about him as a husband material ... So when a man ideally plans out these things and communicates the same to his girlfriend, she is then more then happy to block that time from any other meeting or work just so that she can spend the time in knowing how good of a husband material her man is .... Seeking validation ... Not at all happening especially during dating since it exposes that the man is terribly short of confidence and also unsure of the way he carries himself ... Anyways I hope this video is helpful to all the young dating men out there ... ☺️.
Good statement. Especially about planning dates. Get your chance to plan now. When you get married, she will plan your life away. One weekend at a time. Women can fill your life up with more shit and projects than one man could do or afford in a lifetime.
its so difficult bc modern standards tell men specifically NOT to take the lead. Thats mysognisytic, apparently these days 🤷♂🤷♂
You are so beautiful! Thank you for another wonderful video. I am especially interested on the topic of what attracts women. I like the way you explain everything you say. You’re always easy to understand and feel uplifted after every video you release. Thank you!
Following up on the last point: stop texting a woman continuously, especially if you have only gone on a few dates with her.
unless they are texting you just as much, then go with the flow!
This one frustrates the piss out of me. I think texting good morning and good night is polite. It's a great way to start and end a day for someone, and it lets them know you are thinking about them. I know the game to play is ignoring them and pretending you are not interested, but I hate the game and I think it's cruel, so I refuse to play that game. I don't really push people. Just ask them questions or their thoughts on something. But today apparently saying good morning every day and good night is considered clingy. Like where the hell has society gone to?
@@KBowWow75I know what you mean but to the modern women you can't text them as much. I woukd say no more than 3 a day while you getting to know her. Everything gotta be meet up in person. Hop this help
What I've found is I ask plainly for a text back requesting an item, a time or date to meet up, or something for her to come back with a clear answer showing her interest and her making herself available. If she doesn't text back, I don't follow up, it's done move on.
Every failed relationship I've ever had, began to deteriorate the second I showed emotion or vulnerability. Women do not respect a man that shows his emotions on a consistent basis. They see it as weakness. And at that point, it's over. This is from 30 years of dating.
Hi Courtney, the chronically online part, what if you just like to listen to music all the time, listen to scripture or bible app, or watching Netflix and Anime. Is that being chronically online?
no
Great video Courtney. I really like your green top perfect for St. Patrick's day!
Once you realize and accept the things that are out of your control, you'll realize it isn't worth the effort.
I need help. If things go well at meeting each other the first. So there is some interest between us but after a while of talking to each other what do I do when I feel like I can't think of what else to talk about? I feel like I struck blank
Good morning, Courtney! If I were to suggest a time and place for a date and the woman says that day doesn’t work for her, do you think I should suggest another time or ask what day works for her?
If she doesn’t suggest an alternative, she’s not interested.
If I meet a girl on an app, she's not getting some elaborate creative & expensive date. I think all these ladies are still expecting to be chivalrously pursued by a man like their grandmothers were, but that world is long gone, dating apps finally killed it when they gave women a sea of suitors to chose from. If you simply breathe wrong on that date, all the hard work in putting it together is for nothing because they'll just replace you with someone else.
I LOVE clingy behavior. I need a girl that is completely obsessed with me. I used to have that. It felt so good.
Its no longer chronically online, its terminally online. its me, I'm terminally online
So, being a leader without controlling her, being self centered without neglecting her, and being vulnerable without showing weakness.... right
“Women” who find men “clingy” often times are immature attention garden tools. If said “woman” wants the man, then she won’t find him to be clingy but thoughtful and caring and all the sappy stuff….. ❤️ u Courtney
I will take this advice to the bank. Also I haven't had internet for a couple of months so basically I was living under a rock and didn't know squat. Which not having internet was kind of like a blessing in disguise, I noticed I was happier and less irritable now I don't spend too much time online any more. Exposure therapy has helped, focusing on reality helps.
Rolling around in grass... Helps.
I'm going to follow these tips to ensure I get left alone.
Why are you even on this site? No one needs MORE negativity about dating these days!!!!
Bullshit Fred. If you were that disinterested then why are you even watching this content?
Many of her tips don't actually work. Men who have actual experience with women know this. The only ones that follow her advice are those gullible, naive ones who aren't good at analyzing trends in people's behaviors.
This video can be good tips ASSUMING a man meets a certain woman who is worth trying to win her attraction over. I think the author is speaking in that context. Not all situations are beneficial for a man to worry about winning her attraction because she might penalize him by giving him a hard time about not calling enough or not making enough effort to spend time with her.
Hey. I appreciate your videos. They have really helped. Can you do a video on friendship btwn men and women?
Chris Rock covered that😊
Long story short - yes you can be a friend but NEVER EVER it will be like with other men.
Thanks for your explanations. It gets better if you also use some visualization
How much of the advice and recommendations are related to a product that is being sold!
I agree with you. Now, let's reverse it. What's the fastest way for a woman to lose all the attraction of a smart man who is also fine by his own.
1) Behaving masculine;
2) Having a dating schedule (dating multiple men at the same time);
3) Entitlement, argumentive, being bossy...;
4) Talking like trash and acting like it;
5) Being disrespectful to people in general. waiter...;
6) Being on stupid fans.
Yep, Courtney smart men will test women from the get-go by setting boundaries according to their values and morals. Before any commitment, of course. That's not a bad boy, but it's definitely not a simp either. If women cross any important boundary, he will no longer be interested cause he understands what will work in a long-term relationship and what will not. Looks are less important for such a man. Just a bonus. You know why, cause he understands that physical looks déminage by ageing.
I really enjoy following you Courtney 👌I already do it myself how you describe it, but it's nice to hear from a woman how women see it (perhaps confirming that I still have it in me 😌) And your eyes match your sweater very well because of the beautiful color 🤩Greetings from the Netherlands 🧡🧡
5. Showing any form of physical, mental or emotional weakness, in any way, ever. Women don't care that you're only human, they just want a strong protector, they don't want to deal with your weakness or fallibility. Never risk being truly vulnerable or honest with any womam you want to or have a romantic relationship with, she will judge you negatively because of it, it's never worth the risk. Turn to your friends, family, professionals or even strangers first to help and support you with those things. You may get away with showing weakness occasionally if you're doing well enough at meeting her other needs, she may not criticise you openly, but she will be judging you negatively any time you do it. Women will say that's not true, but they know it is, they just don't want to admit it because it makes them appear heartless and uncaring, and women still get a lot of mileage out of being the caring and supportive gender. Women do want a man to be emotionally intelligent and mature, but because it implies you'll be able to deal with their emotionality, their weaknesses, whilst not dumping yours on them, because you'll be strong enough to deal with it yourself. They do want to feel that a man can go to them for support and understanding during times of difficulty, but they don't want you to actually do it, it's more about their self image than your needs. And before anyone replies with "Who hurt you?", lots of people, but I've learned to deal with it myself.
yep, that's why the men's suicide rate is higher
The harsh truth
Very well said.
I strongly disagree, I don't think you have ever been in a genuinely loving relationship.
@@unaminous00 you're completely entitled to your opinion, for whatever reason you feel is valid.
I went in expecting to relate to all 4, pleasantly surprised that only two applied to me. Maybe there’s hope.
Its always good to have a plan, but there is a thin line between "taking the lead", and "dictating terms". As a man, its important to show a woman that you can implement effective leadership skills, but you should probably also ask for their opinions in matters so that they feel included and considered in decisions.
If you do not dictate it, you are weak. And you will be punished for that as well. No worries, women can be perfectly fine and logical beings 😆
You're damned if you do, and damned if you don't. In that case, you've got nothing to lose by following whats in your heart, because either way its game over for you.
At what point do you transition from nonverbal to verbal communication when initiating going out?
When you take the first step to improve yourself in a mental way, you take the first step away from chronically online behavior.
By the way, I surprised the girl I'm seeing the other night when she was performing in front of a small crowd. Her face lit up when she saw me!
So glad you mentioned the chronically online bit. I was sucked into the redpill content for years. Took a break and Went back to it the other day. it looked and sounded like the WWE except they actually believed they were the undertaker.
The no laptop always throws me off!
Love the Sunday posts Courtney!
It does for me sometimes too! Lol thank you 🥰
I Remember my Ex never being able to make any decisions whatsoever ( what movies, what restaurants), and i mean nothing so she always left it up to me which was fine. When we broke up one of her accusations was i never let her decide on anything 😵💫.
Give the girl what she says she wants, then in the end you find out thats not what she wants. Take any advice on women with a handful of salt .
I had a gf years ago tell me that she wished I was more decisive when it came things like what to have for dinner. The funny thing is our conversations would normally go like this:
Her: hmm I'm getting hungry. What should we do for dinner?
Me: I'm feeling like Thai tonight. Let's go down to our favorite Thai place.
Her: no I don't want that.
Me: Ok that's fine. I could totally do pizza. Haven't had pizza in a long time.
Her: I don't want pizza.
Me: That's cool. Let's just go get takeout from your favorite Indian place.
Her: I'm not feeling that
Me: Ok so what do you want?
Her: I don't know. I just want you to decide.
Me. I just decided 3 times.
Every woman I ever met was like that. They don't make any decisions, they don't do any planning, they don't take any responsibility. It's because they don't really know what they want, they just somehow "feel" what they don't want. As a man in a relationship you're not a partner but a parent.
I do most of these, except for the online thing. I've tried to work on being less clingy, though it doesn't seem to matter.
Love in such a way that the person you love feels free... 🎉
Sometimes we all Need alittle reminder, Thanks 👏
Women can smell that online redpill resentment energy. Dude's walking around with bitterness reeking from their pores.
Two seconds into the “Neglecting Yourself” segment, I knew the sponsor plug was landing here 😂
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂
Smiling without any teeth :O that probably scared them away when I opened moi mouth haha
Getting new teeth / denture implant quotation this week ( finally ) look out ladies
Men will stop asking modern women what they bring to the table when women stop asking it with their no icks mandates and 6 or higher requirements.
If women want men to lead, then they need to appreciate the effort, not criticize and compare it constantly with strangers they saw online.
Problem. Some people's lives versus your own simply don't make sense for you to be making the decisions. My Ex has 2 kids, they are not my kids, I was given little insight into the requirements surrounding them except a general schedule of being with her or not. Why would I presume automatically that anything I'd come up with without input would work given all that heehaw? On top of that, even If I know for sure she didn't have have them, who's to say she wants to do anything? I don't believe in onesided decision making without all of the information. In hindsight, I was apparently expected to be doing just this, and especially in that case with her life it was never going to be something I'd be doing. I want an equal partnership, not someone that needs bossed around
I hate going out, don't particularly like dates, why would I plan something (without input) that she might hate? Way better to have her plan/make suggestions because I'm gonna prolly mostly hate it regardless. I'm only doing it to spend time with the person in question, not because I enjoy in ANY way the rest of it.
It's literally no matter what I do it's never enough. There just isn't enough honest women out there
Keep in mind that do these things in early ages since possibilities reduce step by step, Thanks Courtney.
women wan t a leader and then they dont follow the lead, calling you insecure and controlling. please, courtney, hold women accountable. same as men. anything else makes it worse. i think you got the bag...now use your platform to help instead of milking it, please!° be the rolemodel my daughters need!!!!!!!!!!!!!
i know this will get deleted, but please make her read it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Calling the kettle black it so many women out here who lack confidence in thereself who dont no how or wont communicate who have soo many trust issue because of fealing with the wrong type of man in their past and dont heal! Its crazy men take all the blame for the relationship not being healthy
This woman looks fantastic in GREEN. Irish Courtney Ryan, as they say. Happy St. Pats Days, Courtney (next week).
Courtney, I sense a Tide endorsement coming since people need to roll around on the grass! Those stains. Solid Advice, Excellent video! Taking initiative and being decisive in a positive way is key.
😂😂😂 this made me laugh!
1. Making less than seven figures
2. Expecting her to be monogamous
3. Not being a mind reader
4. Answering her texts too quickly
Sounding like an incel
That's so good, "touching it is not enough, roll around in it." Hahaha!
Idk why, but i burst out laughing when you said that number 3 was Chronically Online Behavior (don't get me wrong, that type of trait is unattractive, but it being relatable is the funny part).
I think it’s best to have real life relationships, like hanging out with social groups at places. I’m going to go to this speed dating event in a few days. At least I get to meet real women and that eliminates the scammer suspicions.
tbh everything is interconnected, so online and rl are basically the same. I can tell both worlds are kinda cringe 😆 Personally I challenge a chance if I see one but I can just recommend not putting much effort in it. If it works, it works. If not then not.
Take notes.
See if the event has men move from table to table or women move. Studies show women are more amenable if they move and the men stay. Also, note the men to women ratio. Speed dating has become like other small group singles activities where there are many more women versus men at these events. If you can do so discretely, find out what percentage of the women are single mothers. Supposedly, the largest fraction of women at speed dating events are divorcees with children.
Finally, don't be surprised if speed dating is like online dating. Women there look for the top tier men just like online. The difference is you may be in the top percent who actually show up as opposed to the billions of men worldwide who could be on a dating app.
Good luck!
@@pace1195 thanks for the advice. I will keep that in mind. I’ll just see what happens. I want to interact face to face with a woman so maybe that can help get a date also.
@@doom9603 I’ll just play it by ear. Never tried speed dating but I’ll just see how it goes.
@@angelacosta466 good luck mate!
Could you elaborate on chronically online behavior? Are we talking about incel behavior or referencing current tiktok trends?
Just leave tiktok and YT useless videos, if you know that it will not help you in the future just dont see it
4:52 As a man.. I cringe when I see my male friends and content creators post things online every single day.
Especially 'masculinity content" or when men say we need to save the world.. what, from behind your computer or smart phone?
The irony is, masculine men don't spend their days mindlessly scrolling on social media or being over opinionated
I think to myself "do you have a life outside of social media? Go build or fix something!"