How Can I Stop Being Controlling in My Relationships?
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- เผยแพร่เมื่อ 23 ก.ค. 2020
- How Can I Stop Being Controlling in My Relationships?
Learn how to change your thoughts, change your behaviors, and change your life.
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the amount of people are willing to see and work on fixing their toxic traits… kinda nice
✊🏼💯🔥
Any progress?
@@chamade166 long story short I was cheated on and being gaslighted
Trying my best to fix myself I don't want to hurt her anymore if u have any suggestions for me then tell me plz
@@vipul4967don’t talk to her
This is very helpful. I just lost my year and a half relationship because I was too controlling. It’s time to fix this.
I’m proud of you 🙂
I lost my wife of 11 years. I need to fix this.
@@ghostbroker6976I lost a beautiful loving person to being so controlling. It’s time to fix it
I’m late but I Hope you guys did it 💯🏆
I once read, “imagine life as a raging river, does it serve any purpose to struggle? Wouldn’t it be more relaxing and peaceful to go with the flow?”
This really stuck with me because sometimes I try to control every aspect of life, and I get frustrated when something doesn’t go my way. This reminds me to let go and go with the flow...even though it can be hard sometimes.
This helped
I hate being controlling 😭😭😭 its not who i am but in a relathionship i loose control of my self and cant control my behavior
I am the same . We just got to take day by day and try not to worry about things we can't control
Good on you guys for coming here and attempting to take the necessary steps needed to better your life and your loved ones life. I wish you all the very best.
Thank you so much for this reminder for us control freaks
Thank you for this video. Good to hear I am not the only one recognizing the toxicity of controlling but challenging to stop myself from controlling. I am one of those rare girls with extremely controlling behaviour. People don't notice well, because I am fake to most of the people I hang out with. When I start to care about someone, I like to plan their life for them so they can have a better life, for example, planning their budget or planning their work/vacation schedule. My best friend is really indecisive and needy, so our friendship worked out really well for almost 5 years now. However, my boyfriend is pretty independent and didn't appreciate any of my advice. He is definitely the nicest person I saw in my life and I don't want to be the reason for the breakup in the future. I am slowly realizing that I cannot change or control people. I am slowly working on this. Good luck to you guys who are also having the same problem as me.
I learned that you should just treat how you want to be treated. If you in relationship, trust your partner unless there are obvious signs. Respect goes along way! If it doesn't work out, give yourself appropriate time to recover before seeking a new person or even better don't look. A chance encounter is much better imo. Still give respect even if it doesn't work out. No point hating each other just because it didn't work out
Yeah this is exactly what I do, make other people's problems my own, as though I'm the only person who's not going to mess things up. It is ridiculous. Already started working on this.
Hell, I really needed to hear that, for anyone listening. It's great advise, I think if I had heard it 3 months ago I wouldn't have been sitting alone in an appartment without my finance. 🧡 thanks for shooting the honesty
I control by lying. Making myself seem more desirable than I am and then the lies make me look psychotic. Nobody wants to be with a liar. What’s crazy is I thought I stopped doing this, but talking to an ex has me acting in ways I used to. Trying to control the dynamic by lying because I don’t feel safe. Now that I caught myself I’m afraid to admit it and cut the loss because I know after I admit it we will no longer be cool like that.
thank you i needed this. i needed the break me and my gf took to reflect on my self, my insecurities. i’m gonna get her back when i’m better of my self.
good luck man!
If she is still available
I'm 16 and oft told I'm controlling. I want to change before it's too late. I've lost every single friend I have.
Thank you for sharing, great point
Powerful words!
I needed to hear this.
Not sure if you see the comments, I actually only started watching you today, but similar to this guy have listened to you on the Dave Ramsey Show. How do you balance the extremes of "I'm important" and thus telling everyone your problems vs "I'm not worth it" and not telling anyone your problems? Also, can't wait for you to get your own podcast! I will be subscribing as soon as I hear it comes out.
Hey thanks for this man.
Thanks... I'm already getting there the hard way after pushing and pushing, and hoping to fix and get things together... but I've already made so many mistakes...
I loved the message and delivery.
thank you
Thank you 🙏🏼
Thank you 🥺
Another great video Dr. D! (But the lamp was a bit creepy, Lol)...
oh i see what you did there
This video is good stuff
Thank you sir
I know im late to this but, i just lost a very important someone because of my dumb controlling behaviour and its about time for me to fix my mistakes.
The introduction was everything lol
I'm here today 4/9/2022 ik I'm toxic, my fiance is so important to me, so I'm here to learn how to get better for the sake of our relationship. Ill update eventually 🤷
update plz!!
How did it go?
MT boyfriend/baby daddy is so important to me so I'm here trying to get my stuff right. I "care" too much about everything he does :/
Thank you
I need help. I am very controlling towards my wife. I really don't want to mess up my marriage due to this .
I'm a woman and I needed to hear this im in a relationship where I want a closed relationship he is indicating to want poly . We,ve been together for almost 16 years. He admitted to keeping this to himself for years. He is a dark empath/covert narcissist. I have fought,prayed to keep things together. So much til I feel if I don't keep control he will drift away.. I know better but im being stubborn and hoping for that one day my effort would be all worth it. He,d see my value,my love,my sacrifice, everything I gone through. And realize that and change. Right now I'm admitted to him why I'm overcontrolling how I'm feeling about all this. He is taking to time to think bout this im giving him space. Im realizing my own toxicity on my part of the relationship . I Feel that he is battling between love and lust and I understand it's gonna be tough. Just like going through my own emotions going through will be tough. I hope in the end he can live with his decision and I can too.
And here I am...trying to figure out ways to have my sister in MORE control! 😁😁
😂☺
I met my friend at the casino 5 years ago. She was free and funny,but when her weird ex was there she was like dead meat. I avoid this bad energy by going to play at another slot machine and I feel much better
I hold a lot of value for myself and know my worth but i still get very jealous when there are hot girls on the tv screen, he has other women on his social media. I just get so worried he’s going to look at that in a sexual way. I don’t know how to get past that way of thinking and not care what he looks at. I don’t want to be the insecure girlfriend, but I also don’t want to settle for someone who might be looking at other women
Yeah me and my gf broke up today and I told her to give me a week so I can fix my controlling issues so yeah hopefully I can do this
“Come on man” LMAO
This is me unfortunately.
Yeah but it's hard when you don't know where to begin and I'm like almost 100000 in debt so i know how you feel
Dmn .... im so annoyed I let a good opportunity slip and go to my enemy... now thanks to that...my enemy has a bigger team and greater bullying power...im so annoyed right now
It's an airbrush compressor
Tell that to the government lol
Im stuck. See SHE, has wont listen to me about my current fiscal situation, which I am struggling in todays economy . Example. She says, Lets get a hotel in scottsdale for the weekend, and do this and do that. Then I say, well that sounds great but maybe we can do this instead, because I cant afford that. Her response, is that I am controlling and manipulative and its always my way or the highway. I see that point of view,, but she doesn't contribute to any costs, and refuses to listen to my side of the finances. She just takes it personally and then throws insults and hate at me.
I like your message, not so much your delivery. You sound more genuine when you stopped the handing gestures and you didn't try to talk like a "college student". You're a professional giving advice, act like it. Not trying to be mean, like a said the message was good the delivery a bit cringy.
I get what you are saying. Sometimes he sounds like he is trying to be the cool guy. He seems to act closer to whoever he is cohosting with on the Dave Ramsey Show. He is fairly calm around Dave but acts more like this cohosting with Anthony O’Neal. He still new at this. He will get better
I still like him though
Thanks, Margarita. I promise that there is nothing cool about me...I'm about as lame and boring as it gets. My friends and family have always given me a hard time about talking with my hands and being laid back...it's not an act or me trying to be cool...but I am also still learning how to talk in front of a camera. It's all new to me. Thanks for the feedback.
Agree 100%
That’s the problem. School teaches people that they should “act a certain way.” Why can’t people just be themselves? If he tries to fit that mold that everyone says he should fit in, he’s not being true to himself or others. In fact, he’s being someone he isn’t. But society wants everyone to fit a certain standard which is just one. This programming all begins in elementary school.
can someone help me, been in a relationship for about a year now, and I try not to approach her like I do my job, where I am usually in charge and handle and have to assume control of the situation.. but, she says things that frustrates me, because she withholds things and I try my best to not get frustrated and try to pry her open, can someone help how do I not handle her like I would my job?
If she's not being open she's manipulating you or lying....
Why is he react to the guilt by controlling her instead of making more money to pay off her student debt? Wouldn't it be better to focus on himself and making more money. Once the debt is paid off they can invest and become rich rather than driver her away if the marry. If they break up, well at least he would have the motivation and things set up to become a more wealthy man. He can apply his anxiety and controlling nature to work and maybe become a billionaire. Everyone wins! Just figure out how much of an externality he would have to pay and make that the target goal of feeling better. Does he feel that he caused he $10,000 worth of student debt? Then he can make that his target goal. He then will have the freedom to marry who he wants to without fear of not being manly enough to support and care for a family. If he feels guilty because he views her as incompetent with money, then maybe she shouldn't marry her until she learns to manage money better.
I just have the hardest time. I've been in cheating relationships, and sawv lots of cheating videos. But all I ask is a good morning text and a goodnight text. I didn't think of it being anything big.
I am facing the same situation 💔
I hope u r doing better by now
@@nadiabeno467 im doing a lot better now! Thank you :) you will make it through too :)
@@brandonboss6868 🥰 thats comforting
@@nadiabeno467 im glad I can be of any assistance :) it gets better 😊
She left cuza this
Every relationship is controlling
Can you see your cognitive distortion here?
Message is forceful & distracting by snappy gestures and rough macho tone. Try a little tenderness.
Wait so dont control her but tell her to read a book ? Wtf is this
I disagree with this. Why not be controlling? Controlling behaviors can be great in a relationship and can still be healthy. Each relationship should be controlling.
you are sick buddy
There are no reasons explained in your video which explains how u shouldn't control. 👎👎👎👎👎
He will help
WhatsApp him
+23457262296
I usually enjoy your videos, but dude (!) you do sound a bit like a human teenage ninja turtle 🙂
You're a doctor not a TH-camr
How do I send this to my boyfriend without sending it to my boyfriend🫣
Best bet is to send it by proxy, a friend of a friend sort of thing, someone that knows him and maybe knows the situation! Thought it's probably best to memorise the core elements of this video and bring it up calmly to them